CHAPTER 2

Season 1, Age 14*

It had been a little over a week since school started and I was really starting to get into the groove of things. My classes were pretty boring (except drama and choir) but I was getting good grades. Mom and Dad had called over the weekend and when I told them this, Mom had said, "wonderful" which was the closest thing to direct praise I had ever gotten from her. It didn't even bother me that she immediately asked about Jesse afterwards. He would have talked to them too, but at the time they called he was out with friends.

Freshman year was going about as well as it could, but there was one thing that was frustrating about it.

"Ms. Corcoran?" I asked cautiously, as the black-haired woman stepped out of her office. Shelby Corcoran was the director of Vocal Adrenaline, Carmel's show choir. This was Jesse's second year in it and as much as I hated to admit it - he was damn good.

Ms. Corcoran had been looking down, fumbling for her keys. My voice startled her.

"Annie St. James," she acknowledged with a slight smile. "How can I help you?"

"Umm…is there any chance you've…changed your mind?" I asked timidly, fiddling with the zipper on my hoodie.

Ms. Corcoran smiled kindly. "No, I'm sorry, Annie. The rule that only juniors and seniors can audition for Vocal Adrenaline still stands."

My heart sank, even though I knew she was going to say that.

"However, if you still want to join in two years - the spot is yours. I've heard you sing before and you're very good. I won't even make you audition."

My face lit up. "Really?"

"Yes. You're incredibly talented and clearly very determined. I imagine you'll only improve leaps and bounds in two years."

"Thank you," I said sincerely. Maybe waiting wouldn't be so bad after all - Jesse would have graduated by then so I wouldn't have to deal with his constant criticism.

"You're welcome. Have a wonderful day," Ms. Corcoran turned to leave.

"Ms. Corcoran?" I asked quickly, before she got too far away.

"Yes?"

"Did um…Jesse have to audition for Vocal Adrenaline?"

"Yes, he did."

I couldn't help but smile smugly.

"Okay. See you later," I waved and quickly headed to my next class.

After school I had my voice lesson. I had taken the summer off to do a community theatre production of The Sound of Music - I played Louisa. This was my first voice lesson in about three months and I could hardly contain my excitement.

"Hey Annie Banannie," Rick said, as the time to leave for my lesson approached.

I looked up from my phone. "Yes?"

"I'm so sorry - but I've gotta go to work for an emergency meeting and I won't be able to take you to your lesson.

I'm sure the disappointment on my face was clear as day.

"However, your brother has agreed to take you," Rick added.

"Oh…that's nice of him," I said. I mean, it was - but how did Rick manage to get him to agree to that? Bribing him? Holding a gun to his head?

Don't get me wrong - I was grateful I was still going to be able to go to my lesson but who knew what the car ride alone with my brother would entail. What would he criticize today? My vocal technique? My dance technique? My life choices completely unrelated to the performing arts?

I heard Jesse come down the stairs just then. "All right," he said, snapping his fingers. "Let's get this show on the road." He was clearly impatient.

"What a delightful travel partner he's going to be," I thought bitterly. Fortunately, I had my bag ready to go.

"Have fun!" Rick gave me a hug. He turned to Jesse. "Thanks again, Jess," he gave Jesse a quick hug, too.

Jesse sighed. "You're welcome." We both put on our shoes and headed for Jesse's car.

I reached for the passenger door. Jesse put his hand on mine to stop me. I flinched - we rarely make physical contact in general and something about the way he grabbed my hand felt especially aggressive. He'd never hit me or anything but who's to say that he never would.

"Sit in the back," he ordered.

"Why?" I asked.

"My car, my rules," he barked. "Get in the back."

My eyes started brimming with tears.

Jesse's eyes narrowed.

"Okay, look, Princess. If you're going to be a crybaby about it then maybe you should just march your ass back inside. I thought you were fourteen, not four."

I frantically shook my head. "No," was all that I could muster.

"Good," Jesse smiled smugly. "You certainly need this voice lesson - you've sure got a lot of work to do."

I swallowed. No, I wasn't going to cry anymore. I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction. Fuck him.

My voice teacher, Melissa, lived about five minutes away. The lessons were at her house. When we arrived, Jesse told me he'd be back in an hour.

"I doubt Rick will be done with work in time to pick you up, so I'll just plan on coming to get you," Jesse said casually, like he hadn't just degraded me for the hundredth time.

I nodded. "Thanks."

"Yep. Bye." I was barely out of the car and in Melissa's driveway when he backed up and got the hell out.

I took a deep breath and walked up to the front door. I rang the doorbell, trying to shake off the whole interaction with Jesse.

Melissa opened the door.

"Annie! It's so good to see you! How was -?" She stopped abruptly, noticing the tears brimming my eyes.

"What's wrong?" She asked, gently leading me inside.

"Jesse…he just…he just said some mean things to me before we left," I was trying not to full-on sob.

"Oh," Melissa said. "Do you need a hug?" I graciously accepted.

"People always say, 'sticks and stones may break my bones - but words will never hurt me' but I think that's complete and utter nonsense," Melissa smiled. "Words can and do hurt - especially when they come from our own family members." Boy wasn't that the truth.

"Are you up for singing tonight? I've got a couple pieces for you to choose from - I think you'd absolutely nail all of them.

I grinned and nodded. I really just needed to get my mind off things.

"Great! Let's do some quick warm-ups and then we'll dive right in," I followed Melissa to her basement where the studio was. She sat down at the piano and began playing a familiar warm-up tune. I jumped right in. Regardless of what Jesse thought of me - Melissa thought I was talented. I felt so safe with her.