Essie chuckled to herself over the six men once again having one of their weird conversations. Roman, Seth, Baron, AJ, Finn and Randy often got into it to great entertainment to anyone who was listening. Unfortunately Essie was their only audience in catering today. She had walked in a minute ago and was getting a cup of coffee from the fancy machine.
"I'm telling you, I have the best ass," Randy slapped his ass. "Here. Feel it. It doesn't get more firm."
"I'm not touching your ass, Randy," Finn said.
"We need someone to be the judge," Seth said.
That was Essie's cue to leave. She picked up the cup, took a big sip, and tried escaping the room without being noticed. She almost made it to the door before they noticed her.
"Essie!" Roman said loudly.
"Crap!" Essie muttered.
"Yeah, Essie will do," Baron said.
"We need your help, sweetheart," AJ said.
Essie took another sip of coffee, spun around and tried smiling while swallowing the mouthful of coffee she had taken.
"You want to drop your pants for me?" Essie asked.
"What?" Randy asked.
"No, just tell us who has the best ass," Roman said.
"Come on, guys. Don't put me in this position. You know I got no filter. I don't want to hurt any of you," Essie said.
"We want the raw and honest truth," Seth said.
"Okay, you asked for it," Essie said.
Essie took another sip of coffee and placed the cup on a nearby table.
"Seth, you have no ass whatsoever," Essie said.
"Excuse me?" Seth asked.
"Seriously, have you ever checked out your own ass in a mirror? Can you even find it? There's nothing there. I'm still convinced to this day that they put a pillow in your jeans to make it look like you had an ass in that movie you were in with all the guns and you choking a woman. What was it called again? I forgot," Essie said.
"Armed response," Seth said.
"That's the one. Alright movie and the only time you ever had an ass. It was fake, wasn't it?" Essie smirked. "You're out."
Seth crossed his arms and sneered at Essie. He wasn't good at losing but he knew she had a point. He knew he didn't pack much behind him but he had hoped she would be a woman that liked small, firm asses. Clearly she was not.
"Finn and Randy are out too," Essie said.
"What?" Finn asked.
"Are you shitting me?" Randy asked. "Seriously, feel my ass. Feel how firm it is. I'm all muscles everywhere, babe."
"That's exactly the problem. I don't like firm asses which means you two are out," Essie asked.
"That's not fair," Finn said.
"You asked me to be your judge. If you like I can go find someone else to play this game. I'm sure Hunter or Stephanie might be free," Essie said.
"No, no!" Baron said. "They're out. They accept it."
"Fuck it. This game is stupid anyway," Randy said.
"You're the one who started it," AJ said.
Randy went to stand next to Seth and crossed his arms as well. Essie chuckled at them looking like a rerun of 2014 when they were both in The Authority. She turned her eyes to Roman, Baron and AJ.
"And that leaves the three of you," Essie said. "I think I might have to get into touching territory now. With consent, of course. Last thing I need is being charged for sexual assault."
"You know they'll believe us with the things coming out of your mouth sometimes," Roman said.
"That's exactly what I fear," Essie said. "So can I? AJ?"
"Touch away, sweetheart," AJ said.
Essie grinned and walked over to AJ to feel his ass. He couldn't help but laugh at how she really grabbed at it.
"Too firm, I'm afraid," Essie said.
Essie pinched AJ's ass and he jumped forward with a little scream.
"That hurt," AJ said.
"Suck it up, buttercup," Essie said. "And then there were two."
Essie made grabbing emotions with both her hands. Roman and Baron looked at each other, smirked, and then turned around to let her feel. She put a hand on each ass at the same time and took her time feeling them up.
"This is starting to turn me on," Baron chuckled.
"This is getting dangerous," Roman chuckled too. "You sure are taking your sweet time back there, Essie."
"I have to be sure," Essie said.
"It's an excuse to keep touching us," Roman whispered loudly.
"I know," Baron laughed.
Essie hummed and then let go of Baron's ass so she could use both hands on Roman's ass.
"We got a winner," Essie said.
"Yes!" Roman yelled.
"Roman's ass is so soft and just delicious to touch. I'd love to sink my teeth into it. Shake it for me, baby," Essie said.
"I have a wife," Roman chuckled.
"She's gonna love hearing about this, won't she?" Essie chuckled too. "Alright, thank you for the memorable experience that undoubtedly will lead to some very weird dreams tonight."
She grabbed her cup of coffee again and walked over to the door while waving a hand in the air.
"I'll see you around, boys," Essie said.
"See you," Finn said.
Essie walked out of the door and the six men were once again alone in catering. Roman couldn't help but grin at the other five.
"Wipe that smile off your face," Seth said.
"I won," Roman said.
"She called you soft," Randy said.
"Soft ass, hard dick," Roman winked. "You're just jealous she didn't even want to touch you."