Tensions were rising in the Council chambers. A calm debate on allowing attachments into the Order had turned into a heated argument on the Order, the Dark Side, and the nature of the Force itself. Anakin itched to get up and swing his lightsaber, fix a ship, build a droid, do something to escape the darkness thickly filling the room, but he couldn't. He was on the Council, at least for now, he'd said his piece on attachments about a thousand times, and there wasn't much more he could do. He didn't want to break into this fight.
"The Old Republic had attachments for twenty thousand years and they never had problems with the Dark Side!" Kit Fisto shouted, almost standing up in his chair.
"They had nothing but problems!" Coleman Kcaj shouted back. "That whole period was full of Jedi wars with thousands of Sith warriors!"
"That is a gross exaggeration," Mace snapped. "The periods without being plagued by Sith wars far outstrip the years they spent being plagued by the Sith. We have had the same amount of Jedi fall to the dark that they had, only now the Sith were in hiding, so they all had to strike out on their own as dark Jedi. And they have, and they've cost hundreds of lives before we could stop them. I'm sure I'm not the only one that remembers Xanatos."
"Yes, and at least back in the Old Republic, the Sith were out in the open doing their deeds where the Jedi could find them and stop them," Obi-Wan said. "Now, we've spent a thousand years with the Sith killing and murdering and spreading their threads throughout the galaxy to prepare for their eventual Sith empire, and they came far closer to succeeding than they ever did during the old Jedi-Sith conflicts. If it weren't for Anakin, they would have won, no matter who came out of that office alive. No offense, Mace."
"Obi-Wan's right," Mace said. "We're doing something wrong. The shatterpoints show it."
"Oh, you and your shatterpoints," Stass Allie spat. "Have you ever averted anything with those? And have you noticed, despite the lauded efforts of Skywalker, the Force is still clouded? Everything is still unbalanced!"
"And no wonder with everyone here acting like children!" Depa Billaba snapped.
"Of course you would defend Mace," Coleman countered. "You're his padawan."
Anakin buried his head in his hands. With all the darkness, the negative emotions roiling in the air, even with his shields as strong as they could go, he still struggled to keep from sinking in them. Even with Palpatine in jail awaiting trial, the Jedi were still tearing themselves apart.
"We should have killed Palpatine when we had the chance!" someone snapped. Anakin didn't care enough to check who. He still didn't regret stopping Mace from murdering him. Mace had come almost as close to the dark as he had. They were all still slipping dangerously.
Well, all except one. Anakin glanced over at Yoda, who hadn't contributed to the discussion in at least an hour. Yoda was sitting cross-legged on his chair, eyes closed, hands on his knees. Anakin reached out to him. He was a tiny bubble of serenity in the midst of the chaos, reaching out to the Force and striving for peace amidst the darkness Anakin was so desperate to repudiate.
Perhaps, to avoid getting sucked into this argument that had already sent Anakin into clouds of anger for too many days, he should copy him.
Anakin crossed his legs in his chair, set his hands on his knees, and closed his eyes. He was never the greatest at meditation, and always one of the more emotional people in the room, so the fact that he was resorting to this really showed how far the Council had fallen. Coming home every night seething from the Council arguments not only affected Anakin and Padmé's relationship, it affected the twins, and that was something he wouldn't allow. He had to get a handle on his emotions for them, and that meant everyone else needed to behave as well.
The Force swirled, clouded with anger, with fear, with hatred, with regret. It clogged Anakin's senses, pressed in on his skin, fogged his mind and muddied his emotions. He reached out desperately to Yoda in the Force, clinging to his mostly serene but troubled presence. He poked an inquiry into the bubble of Yoda's meditations.
Yoda snagged him and pulled him into his bubble. Welcome, Skywalker. Troubling, this dissension is. Meditate with me.
Anakin let Yoda drag him down into a steady meditation. Once he was deep, he dove still further, pushing past the dissension and the darkness to feel the Force itself.
Darkness still clouded Coruscant, but the light of the people shone in his mind. He located his family, Padmé and her parents, staying over to help them adjust, and his twins. Luke and Leia.
Luke and Leia. The lights of his life. Ironically, Luke's name actually meant light. More than anything, his existence and his sister's made Anakin want to stay in the light forever. Even when they were crying in the middle of the night for feedings or because of a wet diaper, Anakin was just so thankful that they were alive. That they were his. The prospect of raising not one, but two children to be functioning, independent, moral adults—moral Jedi—scared him more than anything he could imagine, but it was a good fear, one that drove him to be careful with his words and actions, to go to therapy and rein in his anger and shed his darkness. To be the best he could be for them. He would do just about anything for them, anything but cross the lines he never should have crossed during the war. Luke and Leia were such bundles of shining light.
"Anakin!" Obi-Wan said.
Anakin jumped. He pulled himself out of his meditation. It was harder than he'd expected to pull his mind back from its extension over Coruscant and through the Force itself. He dragged his eyes open to see the Council chambers. All the other Council members were staring at him. Even Yoda was slowly awakening from his meditation.
"What? What's wrong?" Anakin asked.
"What did you just do?" Shaak-Ti asked.
Anakin frowned. "I don't…understand. I was just meditating."
"Feel the Force, Anakin," Obi-Wan said gently.
Frowning even more, Anakin pulled down the strongest of his shields, bracing himself for the flood of darkness that would come rushing in.
But there was none. The Council room felt light in the Force. He stretched out deeper, feeling the Force hovering around Coruscant. The shroud of darkness that had enveloped the planet ever since Anakin could remember, only growing stronger as time went on, had lessened. It was lighter somehow.
Anakin blinked, focusing back on the room. "Did…did I do that? What just happened?"
"The Force feels different," Depa said.
"Lighter," Plo Koon added.
"More balanced," Obi-Wan said, an eyebrow raised and a bit of a smile—or was it a smirk?—growing on his face.
"But…" Anakin shook his head. "All I did was meditate and think about my children." About how much he loved them.
"You, that was," Yoda said. "No doubt. A step you made, in bringing balance to the Force."
"It was an accident!" Anakin protested. He didn't know why he was acting like he'd done something wrong. He was supposed to bring balance to the Force. Whatever that meant. But really, he hadn't done anything on purpose.
"Meditate together again, we should, young Skywalker," Yoda said. "Early morning, my chambers."
Anakin nodded automatically. Meditating wasn't his favorite thing, and he still struggled with the impression—that his therapist had made him confirm and that turned out to be largely mistaken—that most of the Jedi feared him, didn't trust him, didn't like him, and didn't want him around, but if he could actually clear the darkness that fogged up the Force and made it hard for him to think straight, the darkness that clouded the direction of the Order and sowed such dissension among them, then he couldn't pass up the opportunity.
Plus, Yoda was always kind to him, so there was that. And with the hundreds of years he'd spent teaching younglings, he had a surprising amount of good advice on babies.
"Over, this meeting is."
A chorus of arguments arose from the Council members. Yoda spoke sharply over them, thumping his cane on the floor.
"Up for debate, this is not. Accomplishing nothing, we are. Go, meditate, relax, cool down. Study the history of the Jedi Order. Meet again with cool heads, we must soon. Dismissed, you are." Yoda jumped off his chair and began thumping throughout the room. "Disgraceful," he continued. "Acting like a bunch of children, you all are. Ridiculous, it is, that only Skywalker among you, calm is."
Anakin snorted and stood up to follow Master Yoda out. Anakin was a fairly straightforward person. He knew what he believed. All this debate was pointless in his opinion. They needed to either come over to his opinion and let attachments in, or decide they weren't going to change and kick him out, though at this point, the media would eat them alive and the Senate would probably force them to disband if they did that. Or so Padmé claimed.
Regardless, he was tired of all the arguments. He just wanted a decision.
"Skywalker. Come in, come in." Master Yoda stood in his open doorway. "Breakfast, have you had already?"
"Yes, of course," Anakin said hurriedly. No offense to Master Yoda, but his food tasted worse than the stuff they fed some of the younglings in the creche. Worse than expired ration bars. He'd rather brave the sometimes-amazing, sometimes-horrific Temple dining hall than whatever Master Yoda put in his stew.
"Mmm, pity," Master Yoda said. "Better than ever, I believe my stew tastes today." He thumped over to his cushion.
Anakin followed him in, closing the door behind him. He sat cross-legged on the other cushion and forced a deep breath to loosen the tightened muscles in his chest. "So, how do you want to do this?"
Master Yoda held out his hands. "Meditate together, we shall."
Anakin placed his hands in Master Yoda's gnarly claws and closed his eyes.
At first, the meditation was the same as always. Though the Temple felt measurably lighter, darkness clouded the planet. With Yoda to anchor him, Anakin ventured farther than he had ever dared before.
The warm light of the Force pressed in around him, despite the sticky darkness that pervaded the galaxy. The impressions of words buzzed in his mind. Hello! How are you? I've missed you! Good job! Congratulations!
Anakin smiled involuntarily. Maybe this was why some Jedi liked meditation so much.
The darkness pressed in on him, overwhelming the light. His smile slipped. The arguments of the Council pressed in on him. How were they going to resolve this seemingly endless argument?
Images imposed themselves on Anakin. He gasped as he was plunged into another place.
Yoda and Palpatine fought furiously all across the Senate floor. Senate seats flew through the air, then Force lightning. Master Yoda caught and absorbed the lightning, fighting like he'd been taught, like all the Jedi had been taught for generations.
But then Yoda was blasted away and fell. And he fled away through the tunnels.
Anakin could almost feel Yoda's thoughts. The Sith had evolved, kept moving changing their ways, growing. The Jedi had become stagnant, unchanging. They had not grown as the Sith had. And that was why they had failed.
And then Yoda chose to send babies with families and only train them once they were grown up. Perhaps that would be the better way to go.
Although what babies and which families was clouded and unclear.
Anakin drew in a deep breath as he resurfaced. He opened his eyes, stared down into Yoda's. "Did you see that?"
Yoda nodded. "Shown us, the Force has. Change, we must."
"Now if only we can get the others to see it," Anakin said. "We need to meditate again." He wasn't sure why, since sitting still and just thinking wasn't his favorite thing. But he needed the warmth, not the sticky darkness that clouded his head and troubled his heart. He'd never quite felt the Force without the darkness and now he needed to feel what that was like.
Yoda pulled Anakin down again. Anakin felt the darkness again and, instead of pulling away, he followed it. Down, down to the bottom of the Temple, from below the Temple. He wrenched the darkness away, pulled it into himself and shoved it in his box where he shoved all his unacceptable emotions and thoughts, with the fear he hid from Watto, his mom, and even himself.
Yet darkness still radiated, though lessened. He tracked it back, down, down to the military prison's deepest, harshest levels. To Palpatine.
Palpatine's tendrils snaked through the galaxy, darkening planets, destroying souls, pulling the Force down, unbalancing everything.
Anakin pulled the tendrils back one by one, untangling the strangleholds until Palpatine was a writing seething ball of darkness. He packaged the ball smaller and smaller, wrenching it to him thread by thread. Sweat poured down his face and back, his muscles trembling. He severed the last strand, then seized the ball and gathered it close. He packed the ball into his box.
The box shook, almost bursting with the darkness held inside. Anakin's therapist said that keeping things in the box forever was unhealthy. He couldn't chance the darkness escaping. So what to do?
A roiling ball of fire caught his eye. Coruscant's sun. Anakin grabbed his box and tossed it into the heart of the burning star.
The box burst, a blue wave snapping throughout the galaxy. The darkness washed over him, then dissipated. The Force settled down, free of the weight clouding it. Free of darkness. Balanced.
Anakin drew in a clear breath as the darkness fled. The dragon in his heart died down. The Force wrapped itself around him, almost like a hug.
Thank you thank you thank you thankyouthankyou!
Anakin laughed. "You're very welcome." He pulled himself out of the embrace of the Force and opened his eyes.
Yoda stared at him, mouth slightly open, ears twitching.
"What?" Anakin asked. The staring continued, Yoda's brown eyes boring into him. "What?"
"Truly a wonder you are, Skywalker," Yoda said. "Truly a wonder!"
Anakin shook his head. He pulled his hands out of Yoda's. "Well, this was fun, but I've got to get going, so…" He stood up. His legs instantly buckled beneath him, darkness slamming into him.
"He's just exhausted," Vokara Che said. "He's going to be just fine."
"But there's no reason for him to—" Obi-Wan started.
Anakin groaned. "'bi-Wan." He dragged his eyes open. Obi-Wan hovered over him, facing Vokara Che. About the entire Council was gathered around the medical bed he was lying on. He yawned, then pushed himself up. He pressed his hand to his temple to steady the spinning in his head. His body ached as if after a hard-fought battle. He glanced around his crowded private room in the medical wing. "What are you all doing here?"
The noisy discussion amongst the Council died. As one, the Council turned to stare at him.
"You balanced the Force," Mace said.
"Ah, yeah." Anakin scratched the back of his head. "I guess I did. Sorry about that. It was an accident."
"Why are you apologizing?" Depa asked. "This is good! I haven't been able to sense the Force this clearly since I was an initiate."
"How did you do it?" Stass Allie asked.
Anakin shrugged. "I'm not sure. I guess I just did it."
Kit Fisto held up his hand for a high five. Anakin gladly complied.
"I am very impressed," Plo Koon said. "Good job."
"I told all of you he would do it! I told you!" Obi-Wan said.
Mace sighed. "Congratulations, Skywalker. You may be the craziest general I've ever met, but you're a good Jedi. Good job."
Anakin's face grew hot. Praise from Mace Windu? He must be dying. But no, Mace had really complimented him, the same as he had Artoo. "Thank you," he mumbled, ducking his head.
"We have come to a vote," Ki-Adi-Mundi said.
Anakin perked up. "You'll let attachments in?" It was about time.
"No," Ki-Adi-Mundi said. "That will yet take time, but with the Force unclouded, I have no doubt we will quickly find the Force's will on the matter. No, we have decided that, due to your exemplary actions, you will be elevated to the rank of master."
Anakin drew in a sharp breath. Palpatine had gotten him so worked up he had been convinced he deserved the rank a long time ago. He'd even gotten angry about being "denied" it. He could somewhat understand now. He was immature, undisciplined, not ready. So to be given this now was…astounding. Guess that must mean they weren't planning on kicking him out, whatever they decided about attachments.
Obi-Wan beamed. "I'm so proud of you, old friend."
Anakin beamed back. To his slight horror, his eyes filled with tears.
"All right, out! Everyone out! You've exhausted the man long enough!" Vokara Che said. "Out!"
Anakin opened his mouth to protest but stopped at her fiery glare. He lay down and pulled the covers up.
Vokara Che patted his shoulder. "I'll let you out once you wake up." She smiled. "Good job, Skywalker."
Anakin sniffed, blinking back his tears as he drifted off.