Author's Note:
First of all, I don't own Hey Arnold!, That honor goes to Craig Bartlett. Craig, if you ever do read this, thank you for the series!
This is my first ever fanfic, and my first ever attempt at creative writing in general.
This story definitely has a dark tone to it, but I think I can safely say it is unlike any other Hey Arnold! story you've ever read.
This is a one shot set post TJM, but it doesn't have to end! I'd love to see what happens next and I encourage anyone who'd like to continue it to do so! I look forward to seeing where the community might take it!
Thanks to SakiKitty, Pearsquare, AiraSora, and The J.A.M. for their ideas and feedback in the creation of this story.
A very special thanks to SakiKitty for taking the time to edit this story and add some details that I just couldn't quite get right on my own. I'm forever grateful!
With all that being said, I hope you all enjoy my story. Thanks for reading!
Losses and Gains
Thursday had been a particularly beautiful day in Hillwood for most, but for Arnold, it had been anything but that. He had spilled his breakfast on his favorite shirt, then forgotten to put his blue hat back on after he changed. He was late to school, and was even forced to stand on the wall during recess as punishment. Further making things worse, Arnold had been given detention, due to other students talking to him, trying to get him to solve their problems, while he was on the wall.
As if things weren't already terrible, Helga even taunted him once they got back to class.
"Hey, Football Head! Don't you know you're not supposed to talk to anyone while you're on the wall? Doi! You really do have paste for brains!" Helga laughed at his expense.
Arnold walked away, not responding to the blonde girl's insult. All he wanted was for this day to be over, to go home, and forget everything that had happened.
Mad at herself for making fun on her love's misfortune, Helga placed her hands over her heart, closed her eyes.
Oh, Arnold, my love, how I detest myself for the way I've treated you for so many years. She lamented silently, inside her mind.
From now on, I'm going to treat you the way I actually want to treat you, even if it kills me!
After school, the day that had been so beautiful started to turn cold and grey. The weather report hadn't said that there would be rain, but then again, since when could weather forecasters predict the weather, let alone the future?
Per usual, Arnold decided to walk home with Gerald, both aiming to get home before it decided to rain. The day had been excruciatingly long, but despite everything that had happened, Arnold could only think about one thing.
"I just don't get her, Gerald. For as long as I can remember she's tormented me, then one day she confesses her undying love for me. Then she goes back to tormenting me, then she goes all out to help me find my parents in the jungle. Now she's back to tormenting me. Which is it? Why can't she just show me how she really feels?"
"She's just a bully, man. That's all she's ever been since Preschool." Gerald causally replied. "I don't know why you're dwelling on it, Arnold; it's just the same old thing as always. That girl hates everyone and everything, try not to overthink it."
Just then, the rain began; hard. It was a downpour, and the two boys knew they had to get home as soon as possible. Arnold's grandparents had always cemented the idea in his head that if he was to stay in drenched clothes, no doubt he would get sick, and he didn't need that to be the cherry on top of his day.
"I've gotta get home, Arnold. See you tomorrow" Gerald gave a quick wave, before rushing in the direction of his house.
"See you later!" Arnold yelled, watching as his best friend turned the corner and disappeared from his sight.
When Arnold finally got home, he was soaked from head to toe, physically exhausted from running nearly 10 city blocks in the rain, and he mentally and emotionally exhausted from everything else that had happened. He walked up to his room, trying to catch his breath. He was ready to listen to some smooth jazz, decompress, and enjoy the company of his pet pig Abner.
Opening his bedroom door, Arnold could see Abner laying on his bed from the corner of his eye. With a small smile, he started to change out of his rain soaked clothes.
"Hey Abner!" He greeted, unbuttoning his shirt and carelessly throwing it to the side. "Boy, I sure am glad to see you. You wouldn't believe the bad day I've had."
No response.
"Abner, are you okay boy?" Arnold kicked off his pants and stared in the direction of his silent companion.
Still no response.
Maybe it was his imagination, but as Arnold focused his attention on the pig, it seemed Abner was unusually still.
A rush of panic overcame Arnold, causing him to rush over. "Abner! What's wrong!?" Arnold asked, giving his pet a soft nudge.
The usual bright pink flesh of his faithful friend, was a shade duller, much cooler than normal, and his body felt stiff.
The world around Arnold suddenly halted.
"No…" The boy whispered, stunned in horror of the reality in front of him. It was clear that Abner wasn't sleeping, or playing a trick. He was gone.
Unable to process what was happening, an overwhelming sense of panic overcame him. How could this day get any worse? Arnold thought, as he ran downstairs to find his Grandpa, who had just walked out of the bathroom.
"Woah there, Short man, where's the fire?" His Grandpa asked.
Arnold grabbed his Grandpa's arm and started dragging him towards his room. "You've got to help Abner, Grandpa! He isn't breathing!" Arnold practically yelled as tears were streaming down his face.
"What?!" asked Arnold's Grandfather as he was being pulled up the stairs by his Grandson.
When they got to his room, Grandpa Phil's looked the pig over, then stood in shock as his fears were confirmed. Abner had passed away.
"He's dead, isn't he, Grandpa?" Arnold asked as tears continued down his face.
"Oh Arnold, I'm so sorry" Grandpa Phil reached out and hugged his Grandson. "Abner was a wonderful friend to you, and I know you loved him very much."
"Today… ha…has been the… wor…worst day ever…" Arnold managed to choke out as he felt his heart breaking into a million pieces.
"I know, Short man, I know" Phil replied, squeezing him tightly. "Unfortunately, sometimes these things happen. We have to be strong."
Just then, Arnold's Dad walked in the room.
"What's going on here?" He asked as he saw his father and son kneeled down in front of Abner. Immediately he knew what must have happened.
"Oh Arnold, I'm so sorry." He said as he put his hand on Arnold's shoulder. "I really hoped this wouldn't happen."
Arnold was puzzled by what his Dad had just said to him.
"What are you talking about, Dad?" Arnold asked.
"Oh Arnold. Pigs bred by the Green Eyed People sometimes had a genetic heart defect, but I didn't believe it would effect Abner." Miles sighed, shaking his head. "I know this might be hard for you to believe right now, but Abner wouldn't want us to be sad. He'd want us to remember all of the good times we've had together with him. Saturday we will have a funeral for him, and we'll bury him in the back yard"
"I…I don't know…Wh…What I'm going to do…without him!" Arnold cried hysterically.
"Don't worry, son, we're all here for you."
Arnold could feel his father place a loving hand on his shoulder, causing him to cry only harder. He didn't like that his father had kept Abner's potential (though now obvious) heart defect a secret, but he understood why he did. He had enough on his plate as it was, and his father didn't want to burden him with something he could do nothing about. At least he was trying to comfort him.
In this moment, though, Arnold felt completely broken. He had no idea how he was going to get past this. Abner had always been in his life; now he was gone and Arnold felt himself completely shutting down.
The next day Arnold felt completely numb. He hadn't been able to sleep and cried all night long. Still, although his Parents offered to let him stay home from school, he felt it was impossible to stay in a house surrounded by things that all reminded him of Abner. What he truly needed, was a distraction to keep his mind off of what had happened, and going to school would be just that.
Completely distracted all day, Arnold just couldn't focus. Mr. Simmons had to call Arnold's name three times before he'd get his attention enough to answer his question.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Simmons. What was the question?" Arnold finally responded.
"The question was: Which country is the largest supplier of Silver?" Mr. Simmons repeated, now looking worried.
"Um, I think it's Mexico?" Arnold answered.
"That's right, Arnold." The teacher smiled kindly, "I hope you understand I need all of my special students to pay attention in class. I wouldn't want to have to give you detention again today."
"I'm sorry, Mr. Simmons. I've just been having a really bad day. I'll try to do better." Arnold replied, resting his forehead against the palm of his hand, in frustration.
"If you need anything, please let me know. You're one of my most special students" Mr. Simmons reminded the boy, before going back to his lesson.
Everyone was shocked to see Arnold so out of it, but no one was quite on the level of Helga at that moment.
Oh my beloved, how I want your days to be filled with joy, instead of pain. I must find out what is going on inside that football shaped head of yours and help anyway I can! she thought, desperately.
The end of the school day finally upon him, and Arnold gave a weary smile as he watched Gerald approaching him for their usual walk home from school. At least it's Friday, he thought.
"Ready to head over to Gerald Field? We've got some baseball to play!" Gerald asked enthusiastically.
"I'm really not in the mood, Gerald. Honestly, I'd just like to be alone for a while" Arnold replied, trying hard to mask his pained voice, knowing the dread that would wash over him once he opened up the doors to the Sunset arms. There would be no rush of animals in or out. There would be no wiggly pink friend to greet him with a mouth full of his empty bowl, begging for food. There would be no warm friend to lay with him, once he finally retired to his bed for the night. It would all be… empty.
"You alright, man?" Asked Gerald, knowing it was painfully obvious that there was something eating at him. "It's not like you to be so down in the dumps! Anything I can do to help?"
"Not unless you can bring Abner back from the dead" Arnold replied.
Gerald's movements immediately halted, as shock hit him. "Oh man! I didn't know Abner died! What happened?"
"I really don't want to talk about it, Gerald." Arnold replied sadly, slowly moving past his friend in the same direction. "I really just need to be alone for a while so I can grieve."
"I'm here for ya, Arnold. Call me if you need anything, okay?" Gerald reminded him.
Knowing his best friend's heart was in the right place, Arnold felt a twinge of hope that things might get better. "Thanks Gerald, I will. Have a good weekend." He replied.
The two friends parted ways, and Arnold felt as if he were a shell of himself as he started walking home from school. He felt a new hole in his heart that he didn't know would ever be filled. Sadness starting taking hold again and tears started forming in his eyes as he bumped into Helga, knocking them both to the ground.
"Watch where you're going, Football Head!" said Helga as she got up and looked at Arnold who was quite visibly upset.
Helga was shocked. She knew Arnold was having a bad day, but she had never seen him so upset before. She had never seen him shed a tear, but before her eyes was a boy who just looked broken.
"Hey Arnold, what's going on? Is everything ok?" Asked Helga in an uncharacteristically kind tone of voice.
Arnold scowled, "Oh, like you'd care." He replied, brushing himself off and wishing he had bumped into literally anyone else besides her. The last thing he needed was Helga G. Pataki saying something rude or inconsiderate to push his tears beyond their gate.
"As a matter of fact, Hair Boy, I do care!" She stated, placing her hands on her hips at first, but then reaching out to him as a kind gesture to help him back onto his feet. "I don't think I've ever seen you this upset."
"You wouldn't understand." The boy turned his head and stared down at the sidewalk, unable to make eye contact. "What happened to me yesterday was the worst thing that has ever happened to me in my life."
Helga smirked, "What, getting detention for one afternoon is the worst thing that's ever happened to you? Criminy, I'd be over the moon if that's the worst thing that ever happened to me!"
Arnold's overwhelming sadness changed in an instant to that of unbridled rage by her careless remark. "Detention? DETENTION?!" Arnold practically screamed, finally looking up at the surprised blonde girl who he felt was just trying to harass him again at the worst possible time. Adrenaline brought the boy to his feet, he took a step in her direction, causing her to step back. "Do you really think that's what this is about?! Do you really think that you're the only person with problems?! You may have a pretty crappy life, Helga, but maybe if you looked around for a half a second, you'd see there are other people around who have it way worse than you! You… you… lanky, unibrowed freak!"
Helga stood there, shocked by Arnold's sudden angry outburst. He had never yelled at her like this, much less called her something so terrible. Oh my God, something really horrible must have happened. I've got to make this right, she thought.
"Woah there, Arnoldo. I'm sorry, I didn't realize this was so serious." Helga said, trying her best to keep composure so she wouldn't let on that she was actually shaking in her boots. "What could have possibly happened to make you into such a basket case?"
"You don't really want to know." He insisted, narrowing his eyes at her comment.
"Yes I do!"
"You really want to know why I'm so upset?"
"Doi! I wouldn't have asked if I didn't want to know!"
Arnold sighed. He figured maybe he needed to talk about it, but he hadn't thought that Helga would be the person he'd open up to. It was obvious that she wasn't going to back down, and he was beginning to feel like maybe he had let himself get carried away with his backhanded insult.
"Well, if you really want to know I'll tell you." Arnold began, giving himself a second to collect his thoughts and emotions. "Last night… was the most horrible night of my life. It wasn't bad enough that I ruined my favorite shirt, forgot my hat, got put on the wall for being late to school, got detention because the other kids wouldn't leave me alone on the wall, and ended up getting drenched in the rainstorm walking home from school. No, none of that was enough. When I finally got home after having such a horrible day I found my pet pig Abner, who I've had all my life…" He could feel the knife in his heart, twist even deeper and tried his best to swallow down the tears. "Was dead." Arnold closed his eyes, and breathed in deeply. "He died, Helga, alone, in my room, on my bed." He finished, his voice cracking as his eyes gave way to a single tear that rolled down his cheek.
Helga was stunned. She couldn't believe the misfortune that befell her secret love, and her heart broke for him.
Oh Arnold, my love, how could I have been so cruel? I must be here for you in your time of need. Perhaps I can help bring you some peace, she thought, biting her lip to keep from giving away her actual feelings.
"Oh, Arnold. I had no idea something so terrible had happened." She finally spoke, in a soft and understanding manner. "I'm sorry."
"This has to be the most difficult thing that I've ever gone through in my life." Arnold cast his eyes down towards the pavement again. He could hear the sincerity in her voice and now felt even worse for coming at her in the way he did. Grief was truly trying to turn him into something ugly, and he needed to turn things around before anything worse could happen.
"Is there anything I can do to help?" Helga asked, but before she could give him a moment to answer, she got an idea. "I know!" She shouted, pounding her fist on an open hand. "Let me buy you a late lunch at Mr. Greens today, my treat!"
Arnold considered Helga's offer for a moment, conflicted by the cruel girl's sudden change in demeanor. He decided that, although she had picked on him a lot over the years, when it came to serious matters, like saving the neighborhood or finding his parents in San Lorenzo, she always could be counted on.
Before he could reply, though, Helga interrupted his thoughts. "Arnold, I know I've treated you really badly in the past. Please let me try and make up for it now."
"Alright, Helga." He replied, admiring her for the kindness she rarely showed. "Thank you."
The two blonde kids walked together in silence, while Arnold was still deep in his own thoughts. They were about a block from Green Meats, when they saw a sight that made them both sick:
Oskar Kokoshka, entering the Deli, and carrying a dead pig.
Arnold was dumbfounded by what he was witnessing. He couldn't process what was happening. Helga, on the other hand, gripped her fists while her body swelled with rage.
"This can't be what it looks like…" Arnold said in complete disbelief, as he froze and tears started forming in his eyes. "Mr. Kokoshka can't be trying to sell Abner to Mr. Green…"
"That rotten S.O.B. better have a good explanation for this or I'm going to introduce him to Ol' Betsy and the Five Avengers!" Helga said as she clenched her jaw, grabbed Arnold's hand, and took off running for Mr. Green's shop dragging a helpless Arnold along.
In the butcher shop, Oskar attempted to strike up one of his manipulative conversations with Mr. Green.
"Hey Mr. Green, I have something here that I think you'd really want for your meat case!" said Oskar, giggling from his fortune.
"You've got to be kidding me, Kokoshka." Marty scoffed, looking down at what was being presented in front of him. "I don't just buy dead animals from people off the street. Get outta here!"
Just then, Arnold and Helga burst through the door just in time to hear Kokoshka pleading with Mr. Green. "Please, Mr. Green, I'll give you a good deal! Just $20! You can't turn down this pig at such great price!" peddled Oscar, before looking back to see Arnold and Helga standing there in disbelief. He knew he had been caught, but hid the dead pig behind his back and played nonchalant. "Hey, Arnold! How's my favorite kid? Is your day going well?"
"How could you do this to me, Mr. Kokoshka?" Arnold grit his teeth, unable to keep composure any longer. "How could you try to sell Abner's body after all we've done for you?" Arnold felt the tears running down his face.
"Arnold, it's not what it looks like!" Oscar suggested, letting out another nervous giggle. "This isn't your pig, I swear!"
"Oh Criminy! If that isn't Abner then why does it have a name tag that says 'Abner' on it?!" Helga scoffed.
"Oh… it does?" The man looked the collar over, and noticed it did, in fact, have a name tag on it. Knowing he had no way out, as it was Arnold who taught him how to read, Oskar dropped to his knees, and held the dead pet out in front of him. "Honest, Arnold, I didn't think you'd mind." He pleaded. "It's not like you needed him anymore! He gone, Arnold. Wouldn't you think Abner would want to bring joy to a few more people's lives instead of being buried? Who wouldn't love a nice pork chop, eh?"
Arnold couldn't move. He couldn't believe that this was happening. He couldn't believe that the man that he had taught how to read, helped get a job, and even done his job for him, was now betraying him in such a hurtful way. He was now in complete shock.
Helga, on the other hand, had had enough. "I've seen you around the neighborhood, Bucko. I knew you were a lowlife, but this is beyond deplorable. I'm not letting you get away with this!" Helga said, letting go of Arnold's cold hand, and rushing toward Oskar with the most powerful punch she could throw; the impact causing several of the man's teeth to break and spill from his mouth.
"Kids! Stop!" Mr. Green called out to them, struggling to remove his apron and rush around the counter.
Arnold felt a sense of rage more powerful than he's ever felt in his life overcome him. He walked up to Kokoshka and kicked him as hard as he could straight in the gut, causing Oskar cry out and fall to the ground, curling into a fetal position.
"That's what you get for betraying Arnold in such a horrible way, you heartless snake." Shouted Helga, as he made her way over to Abner's body. "You'd better not ever show your face around Sunset Arms again. If I ever catch you there you'll wish you were never born…" she finished, scooping up the pig and turning to her love. "Come on, Arnold. Let's go."
The two kids walked out, leaving Oskar beaten on the floor.
"Mr. Green, help me, please!" Oskar pled weakly.
The butcher made his way over to the pathetic mess on his market floor, and sighed. "It was only a matter of time before karma would come back and hit you square in the face… I just didn't think it would be that literal." He could hear the man whimper in pain in response, but felt no remorse. "Get up! You're getting blood all over my floor." He scolded, throwing an already dirty rag on Oskar's face. "And once you're done cleaning up, get out and don't come back, you worthless bum!" Mr. Green finished, pointing firmly at the door.
Did that really just happen? Arnold thought, doing his best to catch his breath as they were walking back to his boarding house. Did Oskar really try to sell Abner to Mr. Green? Did Helga and I really beat him up for it?
"Sorry if I was out of line back there, Football Head." Helga said, breaking the silence between them. "I just couldn't believe what that monster tried to do. No one deserves to be treated with such disrespect, especially someone as good and kindhearted as you are."
"I just can't believe it, Helga." Arnold replied, finally coming to terms with the reality before him. "I've always been there for Oskar… How could he do this to me?"
"He's obviously just a sick guy, who only thinks about himself, Arnoldo." Helga smiled as she cracked and admired her knuckles. "Good Ol' Betsy and I always have your back."
"Thanks, Helga." The boy looked up at his usual tormentor, and finally shed his first smile of the day. It was hard to believe any of that happened, but it was hard to deny that they did. "I mean it, that was really awesome of you."
A small blush mounted Helga's cheeks as she looked upon his boyish grin, but turned her head quickly, hoping he wouldn't notice.
"No sweat, hair boy… Just don't go around saying I never do anything for you."
Once the two reached Sunset Arms, they walked in together. It was weird not having a bunch of animals run in or out, but that was bound to now become the norm, with Abner gone.
"Short man!" Shouted Arnold's Grandpa, rounding the corner and looking as if he was just about to leave the house as well. "I was worried sick about you! Where have you been?" He looked his grandson over with much concern, then noticed Helga besides him. "Wait a minute, why does your little friend have Abner?"
Arnold went straight to explaining what Oskar had tried to do, not leaving out any detail. After listening to the story, Phil was disgusted. "I knew that Kokoshka was no good!" He exclaimed in self-assurance. "That's it, I'm going to file the eviction paperwork first thing Monday morning! No way am I going to let him stay here anymore! Not after this stunt!"
Arnold watched in relief, as his grandpa turned around and stomped away, presumably to tell his grandma and get everything started. He had always felt bad for Oskar's shortcomings, even if he knew they were always brought on by his own deeds, however that had ended today. He no longer wished to look at that mans cowardly face ever again, and hoped Helga's threat would keep him from coming back, even before his grandpa served him his eviction notice.
Meanwhile, Helga was beginning to feel a little uncomfortable. It wasn't just because she was holding a dead pig, but because she knew her love needed his own time to process everything that was happening to him. She looked around for a proper place to set down the pig, without causing Arnold anymore pain or just being gross. The stairs next to her seemed simple enough, so she gently placed down the stiff pink body and turned to go.
"Well… I think it's time I better go." She said casually, to the boy of her dreams. "Things took a bit of a weird turn, and I'm sure you have some f-feelings to process."
Placing a kind hand on her shoulder, Arnold gave her another smile. "Thanks for having my back today, Helga. I really appreciate it."
A tingle shot up her spine, and Helga felt herself become overwhelmed with passion. "N- no problem, Football head!" She stammered, jerking her shoulder out from under his hand, and awkwardly making it to the door. "I'll just be letting myself out now, See you later!" and before she locked eyes with him once more, closed the door tightly and breathed a sigh of unyielding longing.
Arnold stood there in silence, just letting everything sink in. He couldn't help but feel an appreciation for how Helga had treated him and stood up for him that afternoon. Although it wasn't exactly out of character for her to become aggressive, it just seemed odd that this was now the second time she would fight someone on his behalf and he couldn't get his mind off of it.
A sudden ringing of the phone a few feet away, caused Arnold to jump and suddenly run towards it like if it was saving him from over analyzing something important. "Hello?"
"Hey Arnold!" Gerald's voice asked from the other end of the line. "I was just calling to check up on you, just in case, you know, if there was anything I could do to help."
"Hey Gerald." Arnold sighed, with a bit of relief. "It's been a weird afternoon. I ran into Helga on the way home, and she was actually nice to me when I told her what happened to Abner!"
"No way! Helga G. Pataki actually treated you with some level of decency? I don't believe it."
"I'm as shocked as you are, Gerald, but that was just the beginning. I decided to walk with her over to Mr. Green's, and when we got there, Mr. Kokoshka was trying to sell Abner to him. Helga freaked out and punched Kokoshka in the face. She broke out his front teeth!" Arnold explained, still taken aback by what had happened.
"You mean to tell me that not only did that dirtbag try to sell your pig to a butcher shop, but Helga beat the guy up for it?" Gerald replied, not knowing how to feel. "That's wild! Why'd she attack him, though? It's not like it was her pet."
"I don't know, Gerald, but it… felt kind of awesome to see her have my back like that." Arnold felt himself smiling once again, over the thought. Seeing her like that on his behalf, seemed to trigger something in him that Arnold didn't even know was there. "I even kicked him myself. I just felt so betrayed…"
Gerald let out a laugh. "I don't blame you! I'd want to do the same thing if someone did that to me!" Then the line got quiet for a moment. "Listen man, I've got some bad news. My parents are taking us all to the country for the weekend for some sort of family get together, so I'm not going to be around. I know the timing sucks but I don't really have a say in this. You think you're going to be alright?"
"Abner's funeral is tomorrow..." Arnold frowned, thinking about the inevitable burial and final goodbyes to his lifelong friend. "Don't worry about it, though." He reassured. "I'll be okay."
"I'm real sorry, man. I wanna be there for Abner as well. He was a pretty cool pig!" Gerald replied, wishing things could be different for the both of them. "Anyway, I gotta go. My mom's gotta use the phone. I'll bring back some flowers for Abner. You think he'd like that?"
Arnold let out a small chuckle. "Yeah, I'm sure he would."
"Alright. Later, Arnold."
The phone line clicked and Arnold let his back fall against the wall. He heard footsteps around the corner, and saw his grandmother coming over to him with her arms held wide. She gave him the biggest hug ever, kissed him on his forehead, then gently swaddled Abner's body with a kitchen towel.
"I'm sorry, Arnold" She frowned, taking the pig away.
Prickles of tears formed in his eyes once more, as he lost sight of them both. Managing to hold himself together a little longer, Arnold forced his way up the stairs and to his bedroom. Once he shut the door and turned around, the sight of his bed, and the memory of his friend's lifeless body, choked Arnold up to the point of feeling like he couldn't breathe. Feelings of sorrow started overwhelming him and gates that once could hold back his tears, fully broke, causing the boy to fall to the floor and try to catch his breath while the emotions plowed through him like a tidal wave.
Oh, Abner. What am I going to do without you? Arnold thought as he started crying uncontrollably into his hands, the tears flowing straight out and into his carpet.
Little did he know that Helga had used his fire escape to get on his roof to look in on him. She saw Arnold there crying his eyes out, and her heart tore itself into tiny pieces.
Oh, my love! I hate seeing you in so much pain... I know there is nothing I can do for you, right now, but I promise I will!
Helga could hear his grandparents in the backyard, speaking about the funeral's preparations for tomorrow, and had an idea.
Although you won't expect it, I'll be here tomorrow, to hold your hand, and be a shoulder to cry on, as your family pet is lowered down slowly into the dark depths below. I don't care who sees us, or what they might think because, my Angel, you're all that matters to me! I'll put aside my selfish feelings and give my all to you, and show you just how much you mean to me!"
Helga made her way off of his rooftop, in a way no one could see, and rushed home, up her stairs and to her own bedroom. The moment she laid eyes on her writing desk, and idea popped into her head. "I got it! A sympathy card!" She announced to herself, joyfully sitting down, and pulling out a blank piece of paper. "I can't just show up his house unannounced, for no reason!" Helga began to draw a picture of a chubby pink pig, with white angel wings, ascending to the heavens with a smile on his face. "If I bring this with me, it'll seem just to be coincidental that the funeral will be happening shortly after!"
Despite her amazing idea, Helga suddenly felt stumped. "But I must convince him somehow that he's not alone…" She pondered out loud, tapping her pencil against the wooden desk, as soon a spark of inspiration to take ahold of her. "He has me…" she mumbled softly, as she began writing: "No need to bet you miss your pet…" and drew a picture of a boy resting his head on the shoulder of a girl, just under the picture of the angelic pig, who gave them his own approving eyes.
The next day Arnold was still beside himself. He was so depressed that he couldn't bring himself to leave his room.
Everyone else in the boarding house was getting ready for the funeral, except for Oskar who still hadn't come back.
Suzie had other things on her mind. Grandpa Phil told her about the incident with Abner's body, and she was appalled. All at once it hit her that she needed to escape from Oskar and quit enabling his destructive behavior. She called her parents to tell them about her decision; they were so excited that she was finally leaving Oskar that they offered to let her move back in with them.
Without a moment to lose, Suzie packed her few belongings up into a single bag, and was ready to walk out the door when the doorbell rang. It was Helga, and she was holding a bouquet of flowers.
"Hi there. You must be here to see Arnold." Suzie greeted warmly, gesturing for the nice girl to walk in. "Come on in, Arnold is still up in his room." The woman's kind face turned into a worried frown, and she looked up the staircase. "I know what it's like to lose someone you loved… Maybe you can make him comfortable enough to come down here?"
"Thanks" Helga replied as she took the open invitation to walk in and up the stairs to Arnold's room. She knew Arnold was distraught, but she was hoping that she could make him feel better. When she got to his room, she knocked lightly on his door.
Hearing the knock, Arnold groaned and turned away from the door. He really didn't feel like having company, and it didn't help that people had been checking in on him all day. No one truly understood how he was feeling and because of that he really just wanted to be alone.
Helga knocked on the door again. "Hey Arnold, are you in there?" She asked.
Strangely, the familiar female voice, caused his burden to feel a little lighter. "Helga!?" Arnold shuffled out of his bed and put his ear against the door. "What're you doing here?" He asked in bewilderment.
"I came to check up on you, Doi!" She replied, a matter-of-factly. "But if I'm not welcome, I guess I can just leave!" She said, giving him a moment to let her in, but when it wasn't coming fast enough, immediately regretting her words. Why do I ALWAY have to snap at him? Why?! She lamented to herself.
"No! Please don't leave, Helga!" Arnold replied after quickly changing from his bed clothes, into the ones he had picked out for the funeral. He flung open the door, and stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Helga standing there holding the most beautiful bouquet of flowers he could have imagined.
"Arnold? Are you ok?" Helga asked as Arnold stared at her in shock.
"I… I really wasn't expecting you to be here today, much less with flowers." The boy admitted meekly, scratching the back of his neck, and not really knowing what to say.
"Well, I had to do something." Helga shrugged, holding out the flowers for him to accept. "Believe it or not I'm not completely heartless."
Arnold accepted the gift, but felt a little awkward. "You didn't have to do this…" He spoke, looking the gift over and letting his lips form a small smile, "but it means a lot to me that you did."
"Well don't get used to it, Bucko." Helga crossed her arms and looked away, tapping her foot impatiently as if there was something else she could be doing with her time. "I'm only here because I heard that Gerald couldn't come and SOMEONE'S got to be here for you."
"I knew you had a sympathetic side to you." Arnold said in a sarcastic tone. "Wait a minute. How exactly did you hear that Gerald wasn't around?"
Oh crap! I shouldn't have told him I knew! Helga thought in a panic. "I talked to Phoebe last night, and she told me that Gerald told her he was going out of town for some shindig." Helga quickly explained, hoping Arnold wouldn't see right through her. "And… I just so happened to be in the neighborhood and thought, hey, maybe you could use some support."
"Whatever you say, Helga." Said Arnold, rolling his eyes at how apparent it was that she was worried. "Well, since you're here anyway, would you like to come? The funeral should start pretty soon…"
Helga felt her heart melt when he asked her to stay.
Did he really just ask me to stay?! Oh my God! Play it cool, Helga Ol' Girl, PLAY IT COOL!
"Are you sure you want me to be here?" She forced out, trying her best to contain her glee. "I don't want to be a bother."
"I wouldn't have asked if I didn't." Arnold said as walked down his creaky stairs, gently reached for her hand and led her into the house towards the back door. Helga swooned to herself as she followed his lead.
As the two kids reached the back yard, the others were waiting for them. Arnold's Parents, Grandparents, and several of the boarders were gathered and waiting for the boy to come out.
The back yard was set up for the burial in a simple way. A small grave had been dug next to the greenhouse, and Abner was in a small plain wooden casket that has been sealed.
Everyone shared cherished stories about Abner, but Arnold's brought tears to everyone's eyes.
"What can I say about Abner that you don't already know?" He began, addressing everyone in front of him. "I've had him since I was born, and he was the truest friend I've ever had. He was always there in my times of need, through the good and the bad, and usually there to eat the left overs on my plate when I was full. Some of his favorite foods were egg shells, coffee grounds, and oddly enough, bacon. He liked to play fetch and roll around in the mud. He would even sleep at the end of my bed every night, and listen to all of my troubles. Who needs a dog when you could have a pig like Abner? He was unique and that's what made him special." Arnold paused and looked down at the casket. "I'm so lost without him… I love you, boy… And I'll miss you every day, with all my heart."
Hearing Arnold's words made Helga feel awful. She knew that Abner meant a lot to Arnold, but she hadn't realized that Abner had also been to him what her pink journals were to her. She couldn't imagine how hard it would be if her only outlet for expressing her most closely guarded feelings were ripped away from her.
Oh, my dear, sweet, Arnold. Abner may be gone now, but I'll always be here for you... Helga thought, biting her bottom lip and holding back her own tears. Even if you don't know it, yet…
Abner was slowly lowered down into the hole, and everyone took turns throwing down a pile of dirt, until the hole was no more and a compacted mound remained. He had now been peacefully laid to rest and the funeral came to a quiet end.
The atmosphere became thick and heavy with sadness, leaving Helga feeling out of place and unwelcome. "Well, Arnoldo, I should probably be getting back home" She explained, looking around uneasily.
Arnold looked over at his guest, unsure of how to feel. Before him was someone that, among other things, helped him save the neighborhood, find his parents, and even stand up to Oskar when he was at his most vulnerable. Overtime, he had noticed he was growing these confusing and strange feelings for her, but still wasn't too sure about how she actually felt about him. The only thing he knew for certain, though, was that he couldn't just let her leave now.
"Helga, would you mind staying for a little while?" He asked, shyly looking away from her and back towards the door to his kitchen. "I'd really rather not be alone right now…" When he noticed she wasn't responding, he looked back at her blank face, and felt maybe it might be in his best interest to elaborate a little. "We could go to my room and listen to some music? Just… talk for a while?"
He just invited me to his room to listen to music! He doesn't want to be alone! This is my chance to show him how I really feel! She was simply over the moon. You've got to be cool, Helga Ol' Girl. Don't screw this up! Helga swooned on the inside, maintaining her blank, emotionless stare while Arnold waited for her response.
"Yeah. Sure. Whatever floats your boat, Football Head" She finally managed to reply, causing him to gracefully lead her back into his house, and leave the adults to continue the cook-out they knew Abner would have wanted them to have.
The two kids quietly walked up to Arnold's room. When he opened the door, he saw a small pillow that Abner used to curl up on and the finality of Abner's death began to hit Arnold. For the first time, Arnold knew that Abner was gone. Tears welled up in his eyes as the overwhelming sense of sadness and loneliness overcame him yet again.
"He…He's gone, Helga. He's really gone…" Arnold cried out as he slowly picked up the pillow and sat onto his bed.
Helga felt awful. She didn't know what to do. She only knew that she wanted to try and console Arnold. "I'm so sorry Arnold." she said as she put her hand on his shoulder.
"Why did he have to have that stupid defect in his heart? Why did he have to be taken away from me? He was my best friend, now he's gone and I've never felt so alone in my life!" Arnold continued.
Sitting down in front of him, Helga looked helplessly at the boy she loved, knowing there was nothing she could actually do to bring his beloved pet back, and soothe his aching heart. "I won't pretend to have all the answers, Arnold, but you're not alone. You have people in your life that care for you more than you could ever know, and I'm one of them. Everything is going to be alright."
Surprised and grateful for everything she had said and done, Arnold wiped his eyes, allowed himself a brief moment to slowly regain his composure, before suddenly grabbing onto Helga and hugging her tightly. "Th… Thank you, Helga. You don't know how much this means to me…"
"Y-yeah… Of course…" Helga replied, wrapping her arms around him, and tightening their embrace to physically remind him that she was there, and always would be, unless he made it otherwise.
The hug lasted longer than either of them had intended, causing them both to feel a little awkward. Arnold casually reached for his stereo remote, and turned on his favorite jazz music to help smooth tension out. The two sat there quietly, and absorbed the somewhat melancholy melody of Miles Davis' "Blue in Green".
Eventually, Arnold found himself looking back over at Helga, feeling as though something had to be said, but what? What were the words he wanted to say? How could he accurately describe how he was feeling? Everything was so complicated, that it caused his head to spin and no words to come out.
"It sure has been one heck of a week, hasn't it, Arnold?" Helga finally said, breaking their uncomfortable silence with her voice a bit higher pitched than normal.
"This week has been hell, Helga." He replied bluntly.
Although knowing that his words were true, Helga couldn't help but feel a bit puzzled as Arnold continued to keep eye contact with her, in a way as if he was trying to figure something out for himself.
"What's on your mind, Arnoldo?" Helga asked curiously. "You got something you wanna say?" Her heart began to thud deep within her chest, as her insecurities gave way to anxiety. "If so, just say it! Criminy, you're staring at me light a deer caught in the headlights of an 18 wheeler!"
With her push, Arnold somehow just knew what he wanted to say. "Helga, the last few days have been a total train wreck. The only one that has really been there for me; the only one that seems to really understand… is you."
"Of course, I understand. I've been through my share of heartache, too, Hair Boy." Helga trailed off, realizing she had said more than she wanted to. "Y-you know… like you said, everyone has problems, Doi!"
"Like what?" Arnold asked.
Criminy! When am I going to learn to keep my big mouth shut!? Helga thought as Arnold waited patiently for her reply. "W-what do you mean, like what?!" She flustered, crossing her arms. "Do you think I'm just gonna pour my heart out to you like an open faucet because you asked me to?!"
"Come on, Helga. You might feel better if you tell me." The boy insisted, looking at her with his half lidded gaze, as if he knew something that she didn't.
Feeling her heart fill, yet again, with the love that she's felt for Arnold ever since Preschool, Helga let out a sigh of defeat. "Do you remember how we met?"
"Of course I do. It was raining and you were soaked and covered in mud. It seemed to me you needed a friend, so I walked up to you and put my umbrella over your head and told you I liked your bow. You never told me why you ended up soaked that day, I've always wondered about that." Sharing his feelings caused Arnold to feel a brief sense of confidence in himself, after all, how many other people could remember something so long ago? "I'll be honest, Helga, I've never understood why you always picked on me so much. All I've ever done is try to be your friend."
"That day was one of the saddest days of my life, but also one of the happiest." She explained, her eyes looking down at the floor, before turning her body away from him.
"What do you mean?" Arnold asked curiously, not used to seeing her in such a vulnerable way.
"Well, to answer your first question, I ended up soaked in the rain because no one in my life ever cared about me. I had to walk to preschool all by myself that day because Bob and Miriam were too busy listening to Olga play piano. You…were the first person to ever show me any sort of kindness, Arnold. Later that day you gave me your crackers after Harold stole mine. That simple act of kindness made my heart fill with a warm feeling I'd never experienced before, but once the other kids saw that and made fun of me for it… I decided I couldn't let them get away with it. I get enough crap at home, I wouldn't tolerate it anywhere else, if I could help it. So… I decided to pick on you and everyone else so no one would ever try and cross me." Helga could feel her own heart ache with memories of the past, but knew this was a conversation that needed to happen eventually. "But the truth is, Arnold, you are the most wonderful, caring, kindhearted person I've ever known. I know I pick on you a lot, but I promise it's not because I hate you. I actually admire you more than you can know. I wish I the strength to be more like you."
Helga paused as she was having a hard time getting the next words out. "Arnold, the truth is…"
"The truth is…?" Arnold asked, having a hard time taking all of this in. He always knew that deep down she was more than what she seemed; but to see her speak so honestly almost made things even more confusing for him.
"The truth is, I…" Helga choked again, unable to get the words out.
"You what?!" Arnold finally demanded, trying to understand what he was being told. Once realizing just how pushy he was being with something clearly delicate to her, Arnold took in a deep breath. "Just tell me, please!"
Helga fidgeted for a moment, before pulling out the sympathy card that she had made him. "Maybe this will explain…" Helga said as she handed the card over to its rightful owner.
Arnold opened the card. He was speechless when he read what was written in it.
"No need to bet you miss your pet,
I know he was sublime.
You're in a rut, and you feel stuck,
but just give it some time.
Although right now you may be sad,
and feel the need to cry,
Just know that it's okay to feel that way,
With me right by your side."
Just as he finished reading the poem, there was a power surge that power cycled Arnold's stereo. It ended up defaulting back to a classic rock station that just happened to be playing a song that summed up Helga's feelings for Arnold perfectly. Although she would never have admitted this before now, it was her favorite song. The song was "You're the Inspiration" by Chicago.
Helga sat there, tears in her eyes, completely blown away that this was the song that was playing on Arnold's stereo now.
"The truth is… you're my inspiration, Arnold. I love you with every fiber of my being, and I have since the first time we met when you held your umbrella over my head in the rain and showed me you cared." Helga finally managed to say softly. "The truth is… I'm afraid of people seeing the real me, and I've been willing to do anything to avoid that from happening, even to the point of hurting those I care about… and the one person I love. I know I've been horrible to you for so long, but I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me. It may not be now, which is understandable because things, like mourning, can take time but… maybe someday?"
It only took a moment for Arnold to process what she had just told him. He knew that he had fallen in love with her back in the jungle, but she still hadn't allowed him to get close to her, and wondered why? Deep down, he always suspected that her façade was always just a mask to make herself seem bigger than she was, and that Helga was just trying to protect herself, but now he knew for sure.
"Of course, I forgive you."
His voice came so sudden, that it caused Helga to jump. "You… You do?" Helga asked, unsure if she heard him correctly or if she had just become so delusional she was hearing only what she wanted to hear.
"Of course, I do." Arnold smiled and placed his hand on her knee. "I knew deep down that you weren't so bad, but never knew just how hard and lonely your life has been. At least now we can be there for each other."
He cares about me! He really, truly cares about me! Helga's swooned internally before realizing she had to be sure. "Do you really mean that, Football Head?"
"How could I not mean it?" Arnold gave her the dreamiest smile she could only ever have imagined. "I love you, Helga!"
Helga was in absolute disbelief at what Arnold had just said. She knew that he had at least some feelings for her, after all, he kissed her in San Lorenzo, but she had never heard him utter those words "I love you" to her before.
"Did you just… Did you just tell me that you love me, Arnold?"
"Doi!" Arnold playfully replied. "How could I not love you after everything you've done for me?"
Helga felt a sense of happiness that she never felt before. What Arnold had just told her was everything she had ever wanted.
She grabbed Arnold, hugged him tightly and gave him a passionate kiss.
"Words can't express how happy you've made me, Arnold. Thank you for letting me into your heart."
"I feel the same way, Helga. Thank you for letting me into your life!" Arnold said as he leaned his head against Helga's shoulder.
The two sat together for some time, enjoying each other's company.
Arnold was still sad that Abner had died, but thanks to Helga that pain was starting to subside. He lost his loving pet, but gained his loving soulmate.
The End?