A/N - It's been eight years since I first wrote Can Withstand Eternity, and since then, obviously some things have changed. For one thing, my writing—I hope—has gotten a whole lot better.
And besides that, Sesshomaru x Rin is now officially a canon couple, since Yashahime Princess Half-Demon came out. I haven't seen the series yet, but I do know the important details about the Sesshomaru x Rin pairing at least. Right now, I'm actually re-watching Inuyasha and will also be re-watching all the movies and Inuyasha: The Final Act, to get caught up and then see what the new show's all about and how it compares to the original.
Naturally, the nostalgia made me remember that I wrote a fanfiction about the Sesshomaru x Rin pairing, which, of course, I never got around to finishing.
I'd like to revisit that pairing now, and add in some improvements to my old story. I'll basically be starting it off when Rin is 16, and assume that everything up to the end of Final Act happened, but everything else can go into fanfiction territory.
Let's see where this takes us, shall we?
Chapter 1 - A Strange Proposal
Two years after the end of Inuyasha: The Final Act
The day was as peaceful as any in the village where Inuyasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango, the high priestess Kaede, and Rin lived. The sun shone brightly, a light breeze shifted through the rice fields, and birdsong was heard all throughout the hills. There were no demons nearby, and everyone was contented, and happy.
Everyone, that is, except for Rin.
She sat outside Kikyo's shrine near the highest point in the village, staring down at her swollen ankle in frustration. Only the other day, she had been out in the fields, distributing herbs and medicines to injured farmers. Most of their injuries had been minor, so even Rin, who was training under Kaede and Kagome to learn healing, was able to tend to them. She was hardly ever left to go out alone though, so this had been a test of sorts.
Rin had been so certain that she could handle it, and yet...
The sad part of it was that it hadn't even been a demon or something extremely dangerous that had resulted in her ankle becoming this way. No, it had been a simple group of bandits who had caught her unawares on her way back to Kaede's house. Rin hadn't thought there was any danger in taking the long way back, not in such a peaceful village. Most demons kept away from the area because they knew that Inuyasha and his friends lived there.
Somehow though, these bandits hadn't known, and since Inuyasha was out hunting demons with Miroku elsewhere, the area was largely unprotected. Even so, Rin knew that Inuyasha never would and would never have to use his powerful sword, the Tetsusaiga for such a meager feat as teaching the bandits a lesson. Even Sango, who spent a lot of her time raising her three children, or Kagome, who was pregnant with her first child now, could have handled the bandits just fine.
But Rin had been terrified, remembering all too well the trauma of her childhood when her family had been slaughtered by bandits, leaving her orphaned and mute. And, unlike her fear of wolves—who had once killed her—Rin had never had a chance to get over her fear of bandits. It had remained dormant within her, only to rear up its ugly head on her the other day.
Anyway, she had been frozen in fear as they'd surrounded her, with gods only knew what on their minds. If Shippo the fox demon hadn't been passing by on his way to visit his friends at the village, and rescued her, she had no idea what would've happened.
It was lucky, really, that she got away with only a swollen ankle and a brief scolding by Kagome and Kaede, but that wasn't the point.
What was the point was that Rin realized, for the first time in her life, how truly weak she was and how truly...worthless. Almost everyone she knew and was close to was a fighter in some way or another, able to defend themselves against much tougher opponents than a group of measly bandits. Shippo, despite being much smaller and younger than her, had been able to beat them back without breaking a sweat.
And meanwhile, what had she done? Remained frozen in fear and wishing that she was elsewhere.
It was pathetic.
Sighing, Rin glanced down at her hands.
As a child, she never thought that she'd had any particular gifts, or even potential. She'd just been trying to live the life of an ordinary girl, carefree and ignorant until...
Yes, that's right. Everything changed from the time that she first met Lord Sesshomaru.
When she had first come across him in the forest, at first she had been frightened of him, as any human would be—he was a fearsome demon, after all. But then, she had noticed that he was hurt and resting, and seemed almost passive in her presence. As a result, she had been compelled to help him however she could, sensing for once someone who was even more alone than she was.
That had been the catalyst to the change in her life, from an ordinary girl on her own to...well, to an ordinary girl surrounded by extraordinary people. People who knew how to fight, how to be strong and how to survive. They all did this better than she did, from Master Jaken to lady Kaede to Inuyasha himself.
As for Lord Sesshomaru...
...well, Lord Sesshomaru would live forever, no matter what.
But Rin herself...
She clenched her fists, feeling worse than before. She had already died twice, and been close to death more times than she could count. All because she was vulnerable, because she couldn't do the simplest things to protect herself.
It was hopeless. She was hopeless.
Why did Lord Sesshomaru even save her life in the first place?
"Rin?"
It was Kaede, who was coming up the steps to speak to her. Rin would normally have gotten up to greet her, and even told her not to overexert herself by climbing so many stairs, but since her ankle was hurt, for once she just stayed still.
"Kaede," she greeted, as the old priestess came closer.
"What is it that ails ye, child?" Kaede asked, taking a seat next to her. "It has never been that ye would spend so much time alone. Was it not at dawn that Shippo brought ye to rest here, before heading back from the village?"
Rin nodded. "Yes. I've been up here this whole time."
"And what were ye doing, child? I can see by the expression on ye's face that it was not praying to my sister."
Rin glanced at Kikyo's gravesite, and shook her head. No, she was not praying to Lady Kikyo. Many times before, she had prayed for Kikyo's guidance when she'd had no one else to turn to. She had prayed for a sign, a word, a meaning that would help her to understand what her purpose was, and how she could improve. Although Kikyo herself was also a mere human, and one that Rin had never really known in life, the fact that Kikyo had also been brought back from the dead was something in common between them. But, whereas Rin's mortality was still a very real concern, Kikyo herself had seemed almost immortal herself when Rin had seen her, so otherworldly. She had saved Kohaku's life, and helped purify the Shikon Jewel.
Her name, if not her memory, would live on far longer than the priestess herself did; Rin couldn't help but envy that.
"Will ye not answer?" Kaede prompted, when Rin failed to respond. "Or is it that ye are still sour after yesterday?"
Rin shook her head. "I'm alright," she lied. Just tired of being the only one around here who can't do anything, who can't fight.
But, that being said, Rin wasn't a fighter by nature. She would fight if it meant protecting those she cared for, but otherwise she hated violence and couldn't imagine hurting another living thing, except in self-defense.
It was ridiculous to be that way in the world she lived in, as Rin well knew, but at heart she truly was a healer, and couldn't help but let her kindness get the better of her.
Such selflessness...it would likely get her killed someday. Yet again.
And this time, not even Lord Sesshomaru's Tenseiga would be able to bring her back.
"Come inside, child. The day grows hot, and ye must rest," Kaede insisted, already standing and, as always, willing to lend a helping hand.
Rin smiled. "I'll be in soon, Kaede," she replied. "Please let me stay here just a little longer."
Kaede hesitated, but didn't argue. Turning away, she left the girl to her own thoughts.
It was just as well, because the next thing Rin did was get up. Ignoring the pain in her ankle, she limped over to Kikyo's grave and touched the large stone there.
"Lady Kikyo..." she murmured. "I know I've said it before, but each day only serves to remind me more and more. I've lived with humans and demons both, and yet...I don't seem to be able to survive in either world. What is my purpose for still being alive, when I'm constantly depending on others to save and protect me? Please...won't you help me? Help me to be more than what I am, to be—hey!"
Her reflection was thus interrupted as a figure stepped forward from behind Kikyo's gravesite, someone who had been hiding in the shadows and whom Rin had not seen nor even sensed before.
Someone...who was not a demon, but uncanny as a human.
The old crone had to be the oldest and most worn-looking person that Rin had ever seen in her entire life. She'd thought Kaede was quite old herself, but this person looked older still. If Rin had to guess, she'd give the person an easy hundred years in terms of age.
"W-who are you?" Rin asked, not recognizing the old woman at all.
Smiling, the old woman bowed slightly. "Forgive me, young lass, I'm merely a soothsayer, passing through. Now, tell me, why were you praying thus to Lady Kikyo? I have travelled very far in order to come to her gravesite, and I must say that to encounter such an ardent prayer was not what I expected upon arriving here."
Rin bowed in return, seeing no reason to be impolite, or all that the old woman creeped her out just a little. "My name is Rin, and I'm...uh, I live with the priestess Kaede, who is sister to Lady Kikyo. If you would like to learn more about Lady Kikyo, then I suggest you speak with her."
The old woman shook her head. "Oh, I need not speak to Kaede to know Kikyo, child. I trained with Kikyo at the same temple, back when she was alive and I was younger. Please, call me Matsume."
"Matsume?" Rin echoed. Doing the math in her head, she realized that her guess of a hundred wasn't that far off—if this old woman knew Kikyo, then...
"So wait, that means you're a priestess as well?"
Matsume nodded. "Indeed, though I have been inactive for many years. You see, so much of my spiritual power has been dedicated to keeping myself alive, so that I may see Kikyo's death avenged. She was a dear friend to me, and it was only once I heard of the passing of her killer, Naraku, and the destruction of the Shikon Jewel, that I knew I could finally come to say my goodbyes. This is my final homage to Kikyo, to whom I owe my life."
"Your life?" Rin asked. "She saved your life?"
"Aye, child." Matsume smiled. "You see, I was born a sickly baby, and should never have lived past childhood. By the time I was your age, my illness had gotten so bad that I was paralyzed in both legs, and most times could hardly breathe without pain. I was sent to the temple where Kikyo was a student, not to become a priestess myself, but to have the many skilled priestesses and monks try to heal me there. It was only Kikyo who succeeded. And she not only healed me, but saw great potential in me as a priestess. So, I too began training, and have lived a long, and healthy life ever since.
"It was said of me, for a long time, that I was second only to Kikyo in my healing ability, so well did I learn it. Not only on humans, but on demons as well—yes, I had lived out the potential that Kikyo saw in me. I had always meant to show her and prove myself to her in thanks, but the last time I saw her was before she was entrusted with the Shikon Jewel's protection. The next thing I heard, Kikyo had died."
Here, Matsume paused to wipe a tear from the corner of her eye. Looking up at Rin, she eyed Rin's foot. "I can heal that for you as well, lass, if you'd like."
It was on the tip of Rin's tongue to refuse, as of course it wouldn't be right to accept such a favour from a stranger, but instead she nodded and allowed Matsume to crouch and place her hands around Rin's ankle.
What Matsume did next, Rin didn't see, but she felt plenty. It was so painful for a moment, in a blinding flash, almost as though the old woman had broken the ankle further rather than heal it. But then, the next thing Rin knew, she was standing upright and felt no pain whatsoever. Unwrapping the bandage around her foot, she saw that it was fully healed.
"Wow..." she gasped.
Matsume smiled, taking a seat near Kikyo's grave. "Tis nothing, child. Actually, you did a well enough job wrapping and treating that wound yourself. You have learned much, for such a young lass."
Rin blinked, looking up at her. "How did you know that...?"
"I have been watching you, Rin," Matsume continued, as though Rin hadn't spoken. "I was not sure when I first saw you, but I am certain of it now: you are very similar to Kikyo."
Rin blinked. "I...am?"
Matsume smiled. "Yes. You possess the same kindness, the same giving nature that sets you apart from the common man. Only, unlike Kikyo, your powers have not yet been attuned to your personality."
Rin turned her head away bitterly. "I'm nothing like Lady Kikyo," she said. "Lady Kikyo was strong, so strong that she battled demons and humans alike who came after the Shikon Jewel. She purified it, and used its powers only for good, only to save lives. She...she could fight and kill demons as well, and—"
"And you differ from her in that you do not want to," Matsume finished. "I understand. It is this purity about you, and the fact that you have not done harm to a single living thing, that sets you apart not only from Kikyo, but from almost any being living. Why, even a child has squashed an insect at least once in their lives, and yet I sensed that you have not even done that much. You are so pure, lass, that it would hurt one to look at you—if you can properly attune your powers, that is."
"You keep saying that," Rin observed, "except that I don't have any powers. Don't you understand? I'm just a normal girl, I—"
"Ah, but are you?" Matsume stood up. "I've seen much, child, and I think not. For one thing, I can see that your life has already met its end—more than once, if I'm not mistaken."
"How can you?—"
"I've told you," Matsume cut in. "I have lived a long time, child, and seen much. And though I may not be Kikyo's equal, there is much that I could teach you, much that I could bring out.
"The choice is yours, whether you will allow yourself to be taught."
And that, though Rin didn't know it, would be the second time in her life when she would be faced with a decision that would change everything.
Not only for her...but for those around her as well.
A/N: Whew! And done and done!
My idea for this was essentially to keep some things the same as in my original story, like Rin wanting something different in her life and of course setting her on a course to developing spiritual powers, but I wanted to take a different approach than what Kikyo or Kagome as a priestess would have gone through.
So, basing my approach to Rin's personality as someone who can see the good in humans and demons, her skills and how she develops will take on a different direction, one of non-violence and healing. It'll be interesting to see how this can develop, especially in contrast to Sesshomaru who...well, who's pretty much all instinctual violence.
Ahem, anyway, with that said, please do leave a review if you like the story so far—and follow and maybe even favourite it if you really really like the story. I'll try to have another chapter up soon!