A/N: So she missed the part where souma says the thing that makes everyone hate him but that's ok I think. She doesn't care what everyone thinks.

So, I'm in my first class. And the teacher is olddd. Hes super french and super angry and all the dumb average guys are literally shaking. While hes trying to be intimidating, I sneak up behind a scared boy, pull out the waist of his chef pants and drop a live lobster in there, then drop down to the floor and crawl away. He starts screaming like a little kid and the teacher throws a ladle at his face and starts yelling about disrespect and kids these days blah blah blah...

I crawl over to souma and try to tie his shoes together but they dont have laces! He sees me and says "hey, cotton candy!"

I turn absolutely pink and look up at him. "Hi. Um. Lobster!" I say.

He snickers and asks if I caused the scene.

"Yeah I like to mix things up :p" I say, twirling my hair.

"Well as funny as it is, you might not wanna go around making enemies here, I've already gotten a few death threats."

I scoff. "Please, like I have anything to be afraid of. I could take all of these guys with my hands behind my back... besides, they're just jealous of you. You've got that *sparkle*. They know they're all side characters."

"Haha, what does that mean?"

"It means... they're just average. They don't stand out in a crowd. But you and I were born to stand out."

"Huh... I think everyone's got their own 'sparkle'. Theres something about each of us that makes us unique. Plus we must all be pretty good chefs to have made it here!" If anyone else had said that I would have laughed in their face, but with him, I think I get it. Hes just a commoner, but hes clearly special.

I say, "hm."

The teacher reveals a giant chalkboard covered with instructions for making beef whatever, the textbook french way. I ignore the instructions completely and begin by beating my meat senseless with a spiky hammer thing (I know what it's called, shut up). Then I cover it in salt and pepper and ginger and coriander and throw it in a pot of boiling salted water with some red wine and onions added. The last thing I sprinkle in is the secret ingredient (msg). Then I sit on the counter and watch souma do his thing. Hes got some amazing knife skills. Not as good as mine though. I can slice any kind of meat paper thin, including human :p

I lay down and take a nap and wake up just in time to turn off my beef whatever. I plate it all fancy with some parsley and orange slices and sh*t, sprinkle on some fresh cracked pepper and some more (msg) and I take it up to the guy and he immediately says in his ridiculous accent, "you didn't follow the instructions at all you pink donut!"

I flip my hair confidently, thinking of strawberry donut-sama, and I force feed my meat to him. He resists at first, but upon tasting my delicious saltiness he begins to blush and ends up licking the plate clean. "I'll take that A, now, B****"

He begins to cry, but wipes his manly tears away as the next (average) student approaches him, quivering because he knows his dish is not up to my level. The teacher becomes very angry and throws the plate of meat across the room, smacking another boy in the back of the head. Said boy begins to cry, to which the teacher responds "suck it up you limp celery stalk!"

Then he looks around for me, but I am invisible (on the floor by souma again, in a position to trip him). Souma sees me again and ducks to my level. "Uhhh what are you doing, cotton candy?"

"I uh... lost my contact."

"Oh no, I hope you find it! I'll help you look in a second, let me just take this dish to mr.-"

"Old turkey-sensei!" I shout, cutting him off.

The teacher comes prancing over. "There's my prize student! I have the highest hopes for you, sweet pastry cream~!"

"Keep it in your panties old man! It's time to taste the main character's beef!" I order, pointing to souma.

He bows and tries the beef. His eyes get very wide, and he is visibly transported to a flowery meadow with a stable boy squirting milk onto his face from a cow's swollen udder. He comes back to his senses after writing down souma's grade which SOMEHOW is better than mine?!

"I'm glad you liked it sensei! To be honest it was almost ruined by a couple of pranksters, but I managed to make it even better than it was before they added all that salt!"

"Astounding..." the teacher says to himself. "That boy has his father's gift."

I'm not upset that he beat me. I knew I sensed something special about him before he even did anything. He drops to his knees and starts scanning the floor.

"What are you... oh!" I pretend to pick up my contact and put it in. "Haha! I found it! Thanks for helping though! Haha!"

"Yeah, no problem!" He says, standing up and wiping his hands on a dish towel.

"So um... where are you going after this?" I ask him.

"Ah, I think I'm going to check out my new dorm! Should be pretty fun. What about you?"

"I'm gonna get myself a pink donut, and track down my bestie takumi!"

"Cool, tell him I said hi!"

"I will!"

I skip to the double doorway, push the doors open and run down the hallway with my arms out like an airplane going "nyoooooooom!".