Hyperdimension Neptunia is owned by Sega, Idea Factory and Compile Heart and whomever else worked on it.

I felt it was getting too long or I was rambling, so I ended the chapter when I did.

Chapter 17

IF walked into the Basilicom and nodded to the staff members on hand before walking to the elevator that led to the living area. After riding the elevator to her floor, she walked out and raised an eyebrow as she saw the kitchen table with lots of Gunpla parts all over it. "What's with the mess?"

"Ah!" Histoire's voice spoke up as the book fairy floated into the room. "Welcome, IF. The mess, as you put it, is a project that Neptune and B-Sha were working on, though Neptune made B-Sha stop so they could go take care of some quests."

"...Wait, what?!" IF gawked at Histoire. "You mean Neptune WILLINGLY stopped doing something that she probably had fun doing... To do WORK?!" Histoire nodded and IF felt like her world had just gotten turned on its head. "Okay, I get that she was willing to forgive B-Sha for stealing her nation and running away from monsters because B-Sha got scared, but... Are we SURE this is Neptune and not some imposter? A clone? A robot?"

"Well, I'm not sure about the first two, but the third one I am prety sure that she is not a robot." Histoire told IF. "But if all of them are false and this really is Neptune... She said something about being back..."

"Yahoo!" Neptune yelled as she and B-Sha, both of whom were covered in dirt, waltzed into the room. "We're back! Oh! Hey, Iffy!"

IF stared at Neptune. "...Nep... Are you really the Nep I know? Because the Nep I know wouldn't do work unless she was strapped to the chair or kicked out by Histoire."

Neptune giggled and rubbed the back of her head. "Well, I was still like that for a long, long time. That kind of got beaten out of me when I was in Hades for awhile." A look of discomfort crossed her face, "plus a few other things, well... I gotta at least do my basic job duties, right?" Stretching her arms over her head, she griamced. "Okay, first, we need to get cleaned up."

"Um..." B-Sha fidgeted. "Nep Nep, thanks, for helping me get over my fears." Neptune nodded at her. "I... I don't think I'm ready to go monster slaying by myself just yet."

"Wait, that's what you've been doing?" IF asked and Neptune nodded. "Well, that makes a bit more sense."

"Yeah, well, I could kill a couple of dogoos with one cypress stick this way." Neptune nodded. "I could do some missions to kill monsters that were bothering people, B-Sha could come with to get items that people need and we could desalinate her around monsters."

"...Desalinate?" B-Sha, Histoire and IF all asked at the same time and Neptune blinked a few times before sighing and slumping.

"You know, making it so she's not scared of monsters by seeing that some aren't super scary." Neptune clarified.

"...Even after all this time, you still get words and phrases wrong?" IF asked in amusement.

Neptune raised her head to give IF a flat stare. "When you can speak a bunch of different languages, including one that has no words, fluently, then you can complain about me screwing up a phrase or three."

"...How many languages?" IF asked, confused.

"Well..." Neptune smiled at her. "I'll tell you about it some other time, anyway, I'm gunna go shower, cuz I'm all icky."

"I'll join you, Nep Nep." B-Sha said as the two walked to the bathroom, leaving IF and Histoire to watch them. They both slapped their foreheads as Neptune stripped herself out of her clothes, only stopping when she was walking through the living area in just her underwear. "Um, what if someone comes in?"

"Then they'll get to see me in my underwear." Neptune said as though it didn't matter to her. "It's not like I'm doing something lewd." The two then entered the bathroom.

IF looked at Histoire with an amused expression on her face. "Are we sure that this Nep isn't a clone or an impostor?"

"...I'm not too sure." Histoire said. It wasn't like Neptune had a problem with someone seeing her in her underwear or something, but she was never so flippant with her attitude. "But then again, if what she says is true, she's lived over a thousand years in the other dimension, who knows what she got into over there?"

IF had an uncomfortable look on her face. "I suppose so, there is a lot that can happen in that amount of time. At least she didn't leave a trail of clothes in her wake."

Histoire nodded, thankful they wouldn't have to pick up Neptune's clothes.

(-)

An hour later, IF, Compa and Histoire all watched as Neptune and B-Sha were busy working on the gunpla toy that had been spread across the table. "I'm surprised you aren't demanding she do more work, Histoire." IF told Histoire.

"I checked, she did ten quests this morning before you and Compa came over." Histoire told IF, who gawked at her. "They were only low-level quests, sure, but..."

"That's a lot more than Nep ever did before she disappeared without you getting on her case." IF conceded. "...Now I really wonder what happened to her."

"Nep Nep said something about kids, right? Maybe she had a few babies grow in her belly and it changed how she views things?" Compa asked and both IF and Histoire tried to imagine Neptune having children like that and failing.

"Alright!" Neptune cheered. "Done with my half."

"Same here." B-Sha replied. "So let's combine them together and..." A clicking sound was heard as they finished the Bandam. "It's done!"

"Whoo! Awesome!" Neptune grinned at it. "There's something nice about doing something so simplistic."

"But it took us several days." B-Sha pointed out and Neptune just stuck her tongue out.

"Yeah, but this is simple, you try being a mediator when you have three different sentient species complaining to you because each of them needs the same thing." Neptune really hated dealing with that stuff. Thankfully that didn't come up very often. "And then there's the stuff we invented over the years." Neptune giggled suddenly. "Blanc got really pissy at us all for a over a decade and put a barrier around Lowee and none of us were allowed in. So we had to make something to get through so we could talk to her."

"...So what was the problem?" IF asked, curious.

Neptune shrugged. "Sorry, I don't really remember it too much." She sweat-dropped at the looks she was getting. "Well, I... Do remember it, but..."

"But?" Compa asked, curious. "What happened to the Blanc in that world, Nep Nep?"

"Well..." Neptune trailed off and smiled. "I guess I won't see her again, so I guess it's okay to tell you."

*Flash*

Vert looked at the others as they got through the barrier to Lowee. "Neptune, are you sure that this is the best thing to do?"

Neptune shrugged and looked at Noire, who looked annoyed, but also concerned about Blanc. "No, but we're Blanc's friends. She hasn't come out in a long time."

"She's the one who locked herself up, but sure, let's find out what's wrong." Noire grumbled and she sighed at the looks the other two gave her. "Fine, fine, I'm worried about her too, it's not the same without her around." She sighed softly. "And why couldn't Plutia or Peashy join us?"

"Plutie was sleeping and you know how she likes her naps." Neptune pointed out and Noire nodded. "And P-Ko..." Neptune trailed off, almost unsure how to continue. "Well, she was busy with some private stuff."

Noire and Vert both nodded, accepting that. Things had been weird in Gamindustri lately after all.

The three quickly made their way to the Basilicom, meeting people who were thankful for them appearing, as they were worried about their goddess. Once they got inside, they were greeted by Copypaste, who waved at them.

"HELLO!" The robot yelled, causing all of them to wince. "IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR BLANC, SHE'S IN HER ROOM!"

"Thanks." Vert sighed, knowing the element of surprise was long gone.

The group made their way to Blanc's room and as they got closer, they were bombarded by a rather... Pungent odor. They all grimaced and crinkled their noses as they tried to ignore the smell. Neptune and Noire looked at each other and nodded before sliding the door to Blanc's room open and all of them nearly gagged at the nasty smell that came out of the room.

When they looked inside, they saw a floor covered in glass and plastic bottles, paper strewn everywhere, and Blanc sitting in the middle of the room in her underwear, which were stained with various liquids.

"Oh!" Blanc's hair was out of place, her eyes had bags under them, her skin looked kind of greasy. "It's, hic, the sluts!"

"Blanc, are you..?" Neptune began and ducked as an empty bottle was thrown at her. "Yowza!"

"S, hic, shut up!" Blanc stood up, staggering as she got up, holding a large bottle of something in her hands. "Youze should all just... GO HOME! HIC!" She turned her head and started chugging what was in the bottle. "PAH!" Blanc let out a sigh as she finished her drink and wiped her mouth with her arm. "Das some good so-hic-da!"

"You're drunk." Noire pointed out.

"Nah uh!" Blanc shook her head and took a step forward before falling back to her butt. "Ha ha ha ha! I went boom!" She turned her back to them and huffed. "G...Go home!"

"Blanc, what's wrong?" Neptune asked as she carefully walked up to the drunk CPU. "Come on, you can tell us."

Blanc looked at Neptune before letting out a loud burp and then she let out a loud cry as she suddenly broke down crying, confusing everyone.

*End Flashback*

"It turns out that Blanc was feeling depressed since Lowee got taken over by the Mole People and was going through something like a mid-life crisis. At least that's what Rei told us it was like." Neptune said as she wrapped up the narration. "So she was really down on her luck, feeling really bad and didn't want to see anyone while she tried to drink herself to death."

"...With soda?" IF asked and Neptune nodded. "...How?"

"Carbonated drinks are the only way to make a goddess drunk." Histoire told IF. "And yes, they are to a CPU what alcohol is to you."

"Yeah, we had to help Blanc get over her addiction and help her out of her funk and we promised to not tease her over it."

"...How does soda get CPUs drunk?" IF asked, still not understanding that part.

"How does alcohol get humans drunk?" Neptune countered, "anyway, yeah, it was a bad time for her and the rest of us, but we got through it. That was centuries ago, she only got drunk a couple of other times after that but never that bad."

Histoire nodded, finding such stories interesting. After all, it helped piece together just what Neptune went through and why she was so different now.

"Hey, Nep Nep..." B-Sha spoke up, "do you want to paint this die-cast model? I also have some extra large Nepgeardam toys to put together."

Neptune's eyes seemingly lit up. "Sure! Let's do it!"

Histoire was about to say something about the two putting off work, but decided against it. "Neptune," the CPU looked at her, "just don't..."

"Don't worry, Histy." Neptune winked at her, "me and B-Sha will go and do some quests and stuff later today. Still gotta desalinate her."

"Thanks, Nep Nep." B-Sha smiled and pulled out a box of some gray Nepgeardams and some paint accessories.

IF shook her head, but decided to not comment on it. If Neptune was going to do quests later, she supposed it would be okay to let them goof off. 'After all, Histoire and I couldn't get Neptune to get off her ass and do work for years.'

"Hey, Iffy, why do you think that group that Mister Mouse was working for was after old consoles?" Compa asked and IF shrugged.

"I have no clue, it's not like we can just find a white console with an orange swirl on it or something."

Neptune blinked and looked at IF in confusion. "You mean like the one that's in my room?"

"HUH?!" Everyone yelled and Neptune nodded as she got up from the table and ran to her room and came out with a white console with an orange swirl on it.

"Yeah, Nep Jr. told me that she found this console in an alleyway one day, was working on it to make it work and got sucked into Zero Dimension because of it, so I haven't used it even though Nep Jr. said that it hasn't been able to do that since we got back."

"Wow, Nep, I can't believe you actually have something plot relevant for once." IF commented, causing Neptune to giggle and stick her tongue out. "So what should we do with this?"

"Allow me to put this away." Histoire said. "It would be too risky to..." There was a clinking sound and Histoire looked down to see some small pellets on the ground.

"CRAP! BOMBS!" Neptune yelled and tackled IF and Compa away from the pellets before smoke escaped from the pellets, quickly filling the room and making everyone cough.

"Not quite." A male voice was heard as everyone coughed. "While bombs would be effective, I do not wish to damage the console I was sent to fetch."

There was a shock-wave that caused the smoke to get pushed against the wall and Neptune stood there with a sword in her hands staring at a blue and purple ninja robot with a shuriken on his left arm. "A ninja?!"

"Indeed," the ninja nodded and that's when Neptune noticed he had the console in his right arm. "My apologies, but I must go." He threw down another pellet, though this one just let out a snap sound, causing everyone to flinch as a bright flash of light made it hard to look at where he had been.

"And he's gone." IF muttered. "Wait, he had the console!"

"Yep." Neptune nodded. "Come on, Iffy, Compa, we need to stop him." She looked at B-Sha, who was looking nervous. "Don't worry, B-Sha, you can stay here." B-Sha sighed in relief and nodded. "I don't want you trying something you're not ready for yet."

"Thanks, Nep Nep." B-Sha smiled and watched as IF, Compa and Neptune ran out of the room. "...I'm sorry." She sighed and looked at Histoire. "I'm not doing a good job as a co-ruler, am I?"

"Neptune asked you to take care of things in the city when she's out doing missions, didn't she?" Histoire asked and B-Sha nodded. "Just do what you can so she doesn't have to worry about things back here, okay?"

B-Sha sighed and walked out, feeling rather defeated. '...I'm so pathetic. If I wasn't so scared of monsters, I could help Nep Nep get the console back.'

After getting out of the Basilicom, B-Sha walked down the street to make sure that no one was causing problems. "I just wish there was a way to get over my fears."

"If that's what you wish..." A soft voice that B-Sha didn't hear spoke up. "I wonder if you'll enjoy it though."

"So, boss..." The person didn't turn as a new voice spoke up. "As much as you want to..."

"I know, I know, you two are CPUs, even if you want to torment Nepsy, you won't hurt the people here." The person turned and gave the two girls a smile that made both of them look uncomfortable. "But remember, I require Nepsy to be alive for my plans."

"I don't want to kill her." Ouya spoke up and Stadia scoffed. "Neither do you."

"I'm still pissed at her." Stadia growled. "But you'll give us what we want, Uzume?"

"Of course," the blue haired girl nodded before grimacing. "I'll have to go back for now. I can't manifest here for very long." She held up her hands and two black orbs formed there. "Take this and use one of them on that blonde girl, so she can realize what she wants. The other one..." She smirked. "Since she's afraid of monsters but wants to be a hero, give her a villain worth fighting."

"Of course." Stadia said as she and Ouya each took an orb from Uzume, who disappeared from in front of them. "...I don't like her."

"She's using us, just like everyone else did." Ouya pointed out. "Everyone but..."

"Just because she never used us as weapons doesn't mean that we need to care about her!" Stadia snarled at Ouya. "Those days with her and everyone else are over!" Her anger gutted out and she sighed, slumping. "I just want it to be over. I'm tired of being used as a weapon to hurt innocent people."

Ouya nodded and the two followed after B-Sha, waiting for the right moment to strike.

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