His one lead in this stupid drug trade had fallen apart and he'd heard it from his superiors. It was days like this he wanted her the most. Going to his empty hotel room felt even worse on nights like this. She'd always know what to say to him when he felt this way, when it all seemed like the world was against him. Sometimes, she just knew when he'd had a bad day and wanted to hold her. He'd give anything to just hold her again and have her tell him it would all work out. Somehow, when she said that it made all the difference than when he told himself.
For what must have been the millionth time, he laid down in his bed and tried to imagine Natalie pressed against him as they both fell asleep. He'd become so accustomed to listening to her breathe as he fell asleep, he still found it difficult to fall asleep without her. Truthfully, he probably hadn't had a full night sleep in the time they'd been apart.
She sighed contentedly as she snuggled into his side, and he wrapped his arms around her. Her hand ran across his chest for awhile, eventually finding his heartbeat and staying there. He took her hand in his and kissed it, placing it back over his heart. She moved one of her legs over his to be closer, and he kissed her forehead, resting his head on hers.
"You know, I did just live out every woman's fantasy" she told him.
"Oh, yeah? and what's that?"
"I just slept with my boss" she said, "Commissioner"
He chuckled briefly, then brought a hand to her hair, running his fingers through it, "I still can't believe it"
"What's not to believe?"
He looked at her, and as he was every once in awhile, was awestruck that after all, she was in his arms. There were plenty of reasons it shouldn't have ended like this, and yet, he wouldn't want another ending if he could have picked it.
"A lot" he answered simply.
She smiled, as always knowing exactly what he was trying to say even when he couldn't find the words to do so himself.
"Isn't that fantasy supposed to take place on my desk or something?"
"Well, you wouldn't hear any complaints from me" she said, "Besides, its not like it would be the first time, either"
"Hey, that's between you and me" he said, "have you ever thought about when Liam's older?"
"What about it?"
"When he's too old for a crib, but not old enough for us to lock our door. He wouldn't yell for us, he'd just come in" he said, "Our nights like this are numbered, we'll have to put clothes on every night, at least for a few years"
"Yeah" she said, "but we can always take my mom up on her offer to keep him for a night here and there. But I don't think its the end of the world. I don't foresee our relationship suffering"
"Never" he said, "But I like this feeling"
"Me too" she said, "But we wouldn't have to wear full on pajamas all the time. You could get away with boxers, I could get away with a big shirt"
"You make any problem seem small" he said.
"It'll only be a few years, anyway, and then he'll be old enough that we could lock the door" she said, 'Unless we had another one"
"Another one?"
"That wouldn't be so bad, would it?"
"Not at all"
"Good, besides, I want to see you with a little girl"
"I don't want to have a teenage daughter"
"God, I hope that happens, just to watch you"
"You're evil"
"Mmhmm" she said, "I'm going to enjoy sleeping like this tonight"
He kissed her head, "Me too"
They slept contently, only waking when John heard Liam cry out early in the morning for one of them. Natalie stirred as well, but he kissed her head and told her to go back to sleep. A few hours later, Liam was safely at Llanfair for the day. Before he headed to work, he heard her stirring and brought her a cup of coffee, having had made another for himself anyway.
"Hey" he said, quietly.
"Hey" she said, "What time is it?"
"About 830" he said, handing her the cup of coffee.
"What?" she said, "How did I sleep- "
"I was already up, and you didn't wake back up. I figured you must need the sleep" he said.
"What about Liam?"
"He's already at your mom's. I just came back to check on you, I heard you moving so I came up"
"I have to get ready" she said, going to get up.
"Hey" he said, "Take your time, drink your coffee"
"John, I'm going to be late"
"Consider a perk of that fantasy of yours" he said, "I'll cover for you"
"You don't have to-"
"Its not a big deal. Who's going to yell at you, huh?"
"I guess that's true" she said, "You're sure you're okay with this?"
"There's nothing pressing going on that requires your immediate attention, I think you being an hour late is going to be okay"
"People might talk, they might see you as a nice guy"
"Don't worry, I'll find a reason to yell at the whole squad to make sure that doesn't happen"
She laughed, "I'll have to keep sleeping with my boss, the perks are great"
"That better be the only fantasy you have"
"We could reenact that fantasy right now" she said, kissing him.
"Don't tempt me. I might be able to cover for you, but there's no one to cover for me"
"There's also no one to yell at you"
"Still, first day as the boss, wouldn't want to come in late. The mayor would have a field day"
"Alright. Another morning then" she smiled.
"I'll see you soon" he said, then kissed her goodbye.
"I'll see you soon, Commissioner"
He'd never forget those short few months he was Commissioner. So many things had made him question the choice, but she stood by him no matter what. She'd made sure he kept his sanity, and made sure he came home every night and most nights to a hot dinner. He'd spent so much of his younger life thinking a routine life would be his kiss of death that he would never want such a thing. Natalie had made that life everything he didn't know he wanted. It wasn't boring like he feared, it was wonderful, seeing the people he loved every day, he wished that was his reality now. He'd give anything to hear her say he'd figure this case. When she said it, he believed it.