A/N: So that's it for this one! I hope you enjoyed! Please leave a review so I get inspired to finish my latest... it's difficult at the moment.
"Alright, Natalie, you're discharged" Dr. Stone told her and John once she'd signed the release papers.
"Finally" she said.
"congratulations" the doctor said, "keep your check ups in Llanview, they're important"
"Thank you" Natalie said as the doctor left the room.
"You did it" John said, "I knew you would"
"You never doubt me" she said, grabbing the picture she'd kept by the bed and putting it in her bag.
"How long's that been there?" he said, putting his hand over her wrist to stop her from putting it away.
"The entire time" she said.
"Why'd you bring it here?"
"Your mom convinced me"
"I meant- to Seattle"
"I don't know" she said, "It's my favorite. I didn't want to leave it behind"
"I didn't know this was your favorite" he said, "I forgot Rex even took this picture"
"It was a good night"
"One of the best" he said.
"And I like how you're looking at me, its one of the only pictures that captures it well" she said, "And you know, there's something nice about having that commemorated"
"Yeah, well, you probably could have convinced me of anything in that dress"
"I still have it"
"Oh, really?"
"Really" she said she said, smirking at him, then put the picture in her bag.
"You know, that night, I really thought that was the start- that there'd be no going backwards after that"
"Hey" she said, "That, that was the best night of my life. I got you back, we got Liam. No matter how things turned out, that won't ever change"
"Do you still have the picture from when you got accepted into the program?"
"You mean the one that lived on your desk since the day we took it?" she asked, "Bo gave it to me when he cleaned out your desk. It's all in a box in your closet"
"I'm glad"
"I guess that's your favorite"
"It's a good picture of your smile"
"Well, I was pretty happy" she said, smiling.
"You ready? Let's go find this car"
She laughed and took his hand, as they made their way out of the hospital. As they drove to Michael and Marcie's house, she almost couldn't believe it, how well everything had actually turned out. They had tickets on a plane tomorrow afternoon and then they had a weekend to talk to Bo and everyone else about what happened. Eve and Marcie spoiled them with cooking and Liam was sad to go, but happy that his dad was coming home with them. Eve was already planning a trip to Llanview to see him again. After putting Liam to sleep and talking to Michael, Marcie and Eve for quite awhile, Natalie and John headed into the guest room.
"I hope you know you're stuck with me now. Mom loves you"
"Well, she always did"
"You're right" he said, "She knew before I did" he said, pushing her hair back, "I'm just so- I don't know- lucky, I guess, that you're letting me come back"
"well, don't go running out on me again. Next time it'll be much harder"
"There won't be a next time"
She smiled, looking down. "I couldn't have done this without you"
"You were doing just fine" he told her.
"Maybe, to everyone else" she said, "But I can't have as much faith in me as you do"
"Hey" he said, "You're capable, of anything, with or without me. You just, need someone to lean on. You don't do that so well"
"Except with you"
"so to reiterate you are stuck with me"
She laughed, then got quiet. She wanted to this for him, she wanted him to know, but as stupid as it was, she was afraid of how he'd look at her.
"John"
"Yeah?"
"Do you- do you want to see?"
"Natalie, you don't have to-"
"I know. But I want to. And you- I trust you, more than anyone, so if-" she cut herself off, "I just, you've been so good to me and, I don't know, I just, I guess I want you to know"
"Okay" he said.
She sat down on the bed, needing some distance, just in case he did look at her differently. He locked the door, then turned his attention back to her.
"Are you sure?" he said, staying back, sensing that she maybe wanted some space right now.
She nodded. With him watching her, she took off her shirt and bra before she could even think twice about it.
She was beautiful. She took off her shirt for him, with no second thoughts whatsoever. He loved that about her, that she wouldn't second-guess herself until everything was said and done. Her breasts, which had once been full now each had a few gaps cuts out them, and they weren't full or symmetrical anymore. Somehow, she was still beautiful, he was still enthralled with the sight of her.
She waited. She was sure she would see a sign of pity, some surefire sign that he thought she was broken. Finally, his eyes met hers.
And there was no sign of pity.
He looked at her the same he always did. Like she was the only one in the whole world he was noticing.
She didn't expect him to say anything, so she was caught off guard when he did speak.
"You're beautiful"
Her eyes welled up and he was next to her instantaneously to wipe her tears away. She couldn't say anything, she was so caught up in the moment.
"Does it hurt?" he asked.
She shook her head, still unbelieving that he was so okay with all of this. That he could even look at her the same way still. They just looked into each other's eyes, saying everything they had to without ever speaking a word. Gently, he kissed her, and she was sure she disintegrated. It was so sweet, and gave her everything she needed. When they came up for air, he looked at her again, and bent his head down. Ever so gently, he kissed the parts of her breasts that had been cut out. He was so gentle and careful, she felt so loved, and any doubts that she'd ever had about this were gone.
He couldn't explain how he thought to do that. All he knew was that she looked so scared, so sure he'd see and go running, and he wanted to change that. The cuts didn't matter to him so much as the look of fear in her eyes when she showed him. He already knew he'd do whatever he could to take that look out of her eyes. He kissed her, trying to show her it didn't matter, that she was always stronger than the battle she was fighting. Then, he wanted to show her, prove to her that she was just as beautiful as before, that those cuts didn't change that, nothing could. So he'd kissed her cuts, as gently as he could for fear he'd hurt her or that she didn't want him to. When he looked back in her eyes, she was still crying. She was so silent he wasn't sure if they good tears or bad tears, but he wiped them away just the same.
"I love you" she said, quietly.
"I love you" he said back, not sure what else she needed.
"I don't know what I expected, but this wasn't it" she said.
"Natalie-"
"You make this all seem okay. You make me feel like its not so big a deal" she said, "You're still looking at me like you always do"
"Well, you're real easy on the eyes"
"Thank you" she said, "You have no idea what kind of peace you just gave me"
"Anytime" he said, "but I should be thanking you"
"We've been over this" she said, "We need each other"
"Yeah" he said, "for better or worse, right?"
"John-"
"What I'm just saying-"
"You're going to torture me, aren't you? I said I wanted a surprise and now all the hints start"
"About what?" he said, feigning innocence.
"Fine, be that way" she said, "Will you hold me tonight?"
He nodded, "Let's get some sleep"