As I slowly return to the "real"—I'm not sure what I should consider real anymore—world, the bits and pieces materialize before me. The gentle sway of the walls and the creak of metal along the howling wind and pounding rain tell me I'm back on the USS Telluride. When I notice Tim and Tony aren't here, I begin to lose whatever cool I have left. It takes a moment to realize where I am.
In the hallway outside Agent Palisades' office.
Beneath the scream of the hurricane, I catch sounds I recognize from before. They are so far away that I probably wouldn't be able to hear them if I were still human. That a sporadic hammer that reverberates from deep within the ship competing with the light tapping of Morse Code message: SOS. Wherever they are, Tim and Tony are still alive. For now.
On reflex, I take a deep breath. Nothing fills my lungs. I should be used to the emptiness by now, but the simple action is a comfort itself. If I can find them, I might be able to help them escape.
Not far up the hallway, I hear muted voices carry from Palisades' office. Rolling onto the balls of my feet, I sneak down the hallway like I did during my days as an agent. I might not be one anymore—hell, I'm not even alive anymore—but some habits die hard. Okay, I might need to rethink my metaphors here. But Gibbs' training runs so deep that I can't forget it even in the afterlife.
The hallway is dark and foreboding like something in a horror movie. The only light sneaks from Palisades' office. I wonder if there might be an electrical malfunction because the rest of the ship seems plunged into darkness. I slip to the end of the hallway, peering into Palisades' office.
Beside his desk, Palisades stands with his arms crossed, ennui deepening the creases on his face. Latimer waits in the corner with his hands on his hips, eyes darting between the Palisades and Gibbs.
Wait, when did Gibbs get here? That means I was gone for hours.
Oh G-d, Tim and Tony…
Gibbs is just inside the door frame. His hands are at his sides, his back ramrod straight. If I hadn't worked with him for years, I would say he was at ease. Yet, I notice how his right hand itches to whip out his weapon. Based on his soaked clothes and wet hair, I suspect he drove straight from Washington.
Gibbs orders: "Tell me where my agents are."
Palisades offers a languid shrug. "They left hours ago, Agent Gibbs. If they never made it back, odds are they're still on the road. It's a long drive back to DC and with the weather –" he sucks against his teeth " – it might take a while."
"They why is there an Agency car still in the parking lot?" Gibbs asks.
Palisades shoots Latimer a death glare and the ensign drops his head. I bet Latimer is lazy enough to wait until the storm was over to destroy the evidence. If he caught the interaction, Gibbs doesn't let on. Instead, he just stares at Palisades while he waits for an answer.
Sliding between then, I inch closer to Gibbs' face. After the encounter with Abby, I half-expect him to see him. I am still as transparent as glass to him. He stares through me, eyes locked on Palisades.
"They're here!" I yell. "Tony and McGee are here. Just listen."
Even though the room was already quiet, it goes even more still since I stop talking. Palisades eventually clears his throat. He worries a spot on the back of his neck, clearly shaken by something. I swivel around as I try to decide what to do next. As soon as he catches sight of me, Palisades rears back. My eyebrows jump at the awareness that he can see me, even if it wasn't the person I wanted.
"Where are my agents?" Gibbs suddenly growls.
Palisades skitters backwards as though the room is on fire and I am the dancing flames. I advance slowly, trying my best to play the scary ghost of Palisades' nightmares. He backs into his desk and skitters to the side like a crab until he is clear. He keeps retreating until his back is against the wall.
Emboldened, Gibbs steps forward with his hand hovering over his weapon.
"Just go," Palisades says.
"I'm not going anywhere," Gibbs says. "There's vomit on shoe, Palisade. McGee gets seasick." He pauses for effect. When nothing happens, his brow furrows. "They were here. What did you do to them?"
I draw closer still. Palisades flattens his back against the wall, the color drains from his face. His eyes are wide. They are the color of the ocean on a clear day, the same color as me. Up close, I didn't realize how old he really is. He holds up his hands defensively.
"Leave me alone!" He sounds like he is out of breath.
"Tell him where they are." My voice comes out all wrong, menacing and foreboding like something from one of Tony's old school horror movies.
Palisades' face twists with raw terror. "Go –" he gasps " – away!"
I gesture at Gibbs. "Tell him where they are."
Latimer rushes over, panic closing on him too. Passing straight through me, he crouches in front of Palisades. He puts his hands hand on Palisades' shoulders to shake him gently. Now that I'm looking at Palisades again, he doesn't look good. His skin is pale, sweat dripping down his face. He gasps for air as though there isn't any air in the room.
"What's going on, Pali?" Latimer asks.
"She's back." Wild-eyed, Palisades turns to Latimer. "She knows."
"Who knows what?" Latimer asks stupidly.
"The Woman - " a sick-sounding gasp " - in Blue." Palisades' voice is a shaky whisper between breaths.
He points at me as though Latimer could see me too. I wave at the ensign, but he continues to keep his eyes locked on Palisades.
"She's right there," Palisades whispers. "Just look."
Latimer glances to the spot where I am, but his brow furrows as he studies the space. Turning back to Palisades, Latimer's face is a mask of confusion and fear.
"There's no one there," Latimer says.
"Yes, there is," Palisades gasps through bloodless lips. "She is."
I lean closer to him. "I'm not here for them. Just you. Tell Gibbs where they are."
"No." His chest is heaving, a bluish tinge touching his lips. His voice comes weaker this time: "No."
When I reach for him with both hands, he throws his body to the side. Latimer leaps back as though he has been burned. Palisades suddenly clutches his hands to his chest. Sweat cascades in rivers down his face, his lips are tinged with blue. His body spasms as it realizes a quiet rattle.
Shocked at the sight, I backpedal until I'm across the room. Did I scare him to death?
Suddenly, Latimer bolts into the hallway. He is gone in the blink of an eye. Gibbs doesn't bother to chase him. For a moment, I forgot he was even here. He appears as poleaxed as I am. His eyes still dart between Palisades' corpse…and me?
"Kate?" My name comes like a prayer.
It feels so good to hear it after all this time. Unsure if he can hear me, I nod slowly. My own eyes are still locked on Palisades. I half-expect his spirit to climb out of his body and call me away like the scene from Ghost. I can almost hear Tony throwing some random quote that makes no sense, but somehow fits the moment perfectly. Only Tony would have a movie quote for a dead teammate killing the person holding him hostage by complete accident.
I feel Gibbs' eyes on me before I turn to look at him.
"What happened, Kate?" he asks.
I bite my lip, shrugging. "I think I scared him to death."
"Yeah, I noticed." He wrinkles his nose at Palisades' corpse. "I meant, to you?"
I shrug again. "I don't know anymore, Gibbs. I was gone and now, I'm back. It doesn't really matter now. You need to help Tony and McGee before Latimer rallies the troops."
Gibbs squints at me. "The troops?"
"It's a long story. Tony will fill you in. I don't know how long I have."
He tilts his head in a Lead the way motion. My heart clenches at the sight of his expression. So many nights in the bullpen, so many times he would make the same motion on our way into a raid. This will be the last he will give me. I don't know how I know, but I do. I swallow hard at the realization. We don't have time for reminiscences and misty eyes.
I listen carefully for the sound of Tim and Tony. For a long beat, the world is as quiet as a grave and I'm terrified Latimer beat us there. Then, the steady rap of SOS kicks up again, followed by another wham of Tony's wrench against their prison door. Oh thank G-d, they're still alive. I move slowly down the hallway with Gibbs trailing. As we go, he clears his throat. I glance over my shoulder at him.
"Something on your mind, Gibbs?" I ask.
"You were there earlier." It's a statement, not a question.
I bob my head. "At the firing range and the restaurant."
"You tried to tell me."
"Yeah, but you were too worried about avenging my death." I might as well speak the truth while I have the chance. "You were more worried about revenge than your team. They could've died too."
At my words, Gibbs blanches. A frown threatens to swallow his face. Rubbing the back of his neck, he stares at the floor. The tapping grows louder as we move deeper into the ship.
"I thought it was what you would have wanted," he offers sadly.
"I would have." I purse my lips. "At least, I think I would have." Sighing, I throw my hands out. "Things changed a lot after I died. Now, I just want my friends and family safe."
"I want that too," he whispers.
"Then prove it."
Unsure how to respond, he lets me lead the way. His steady footfalls reverberate over the metal grates on the floor. As we move, he unsheathes his knife. He taps out a quick message in Morse Code on an exposed pipe. There's a momentary pause before a rapid fire response comes.
"What did you say?" I ask.
"I'm coming." He half-smiles. "McGee asked if it was me. I confirmed."
At the knowledge the calvary is coming, Tim abandons his SOS message. The noise is random now merely clinks and clacks with Tony throwing in a slam for good measure. Sliding beside me, Gibbs walks in step with me for the rest of our journey. Thankfully, we don't encounter another soul until we reach the room where Tim and Tony are being held. Part of me wonders whether Latimer told his henchmen about the terrifying "Woman in Blue" haunting the hull of the ship. An earthbound spirit ready to rain hellfire on whomever hurt her family. Even though I'm dead, I do have to admit it is kind of cool to have a terrifying alter ego. Maybe I'll come back and haunt Tony.
When we arrive at the source of the noise, Gibbs pounds against the door with his fist. The metal pounding cuts out. On the other side, there is an excited rumble that sounds like Tim and Tony. They're both speaking, but I can't make out the words.
"Can't hear you, DiNozzo," Gibbs yells.
More excited chatter. Quieter like Tim and Tony are talking to each other. Then, it comes louder, but still unintelligible. So I do the only appropriate thing in this situation. I stick my head through the door.
Tim and Tony stand facing the door. They both look exhausted. With his wrinkled and filthy suit, Tony doesn't resemble the confident, put together man I'm used to. The white teeth of his smile are a crack against the dirt and motor oil on his face. Tim's outfit is less rumpled, but his face is bruised and grimy. His left eye is swollen shut, the purple spreading down his cheek. He attempts to grin, but ends up needing to hold his cheek as he does.
"Hi Kate," Tim says when he notices me.
"How's it hanging, McGee?" I ask.
He shudders as his grin broadens. "It's hanging."
I slide all the way through to join my team. On the other side, I hear Gibbs talking. We can't make out a single word. I offer Tony a shrug.
Finally, Gibbs shouts: "Going to open the door. DiNozzo, you and McGee stand clear."
"I heard that," Tony says. Then he yells: "Right!"
Opening the door takes Gibbs a few tries. Eventually, there is a loud groan and the lock turns. A few more turns and the door flings opens. Inside, Tim and Tony squint at the light cascading from the hallway. At the sight of Gibbs, he bolts out of the room. Unsteady on his feet, Tim is right on Tony's heels. He rests a hand on the wall to keep him upright.
Gibbs presses a hand to his face as he takes in the team. Tony, who is mostly fine. Tim, a seasick mess with a black eye. And me, a terrifying ghost who apparently haunts the high seas.
Something that might be tears well up in his eyes.
"Kate's back," Tim offers.
Gibbs blinks slowly. "You can see her?"
Tony furrows his brow at him. "She's been here a few times, Boss. Is this the first time you saw her?"
Gibbs doesn't reply. Instead, he continues to soak us up.
"I'm glad you're back, Kate," Tim says.
I grin at him. "I'm glad you're okay, McGee."
He gags into the back of his hand. "I will be okay once I'm off this ship."
"Let's just say we both will be when we get off this ship." Tony glances back towards their previous prison, shuddering. "And here, I thought you yakked up your entire lunch on Palisades' shoes."
Tim tries to chuckle, but it comes out wrong. "Nope, I saved some just for you."
"What a great time not to be able to smell anything." I start to laugh.
"I'm just glad you boys are safe," Gibbs says. "And you're back, Kate."
At that moment, Gibbs draws the three of us into a hug the best he can. Mostly, he holds onto Tim and Tony for dear life while leaving a small space where I should be. My body ends up sliding the three of them. The heat of their blood and the distinct thump of their three hearts—Gibbs is steady while Tim's is frenetic while Tony's is surprisingly relaxed—fills me with a hope I haven't felt in a long time. It feels a lot like coming home after a long vacation. I never want to leave again.
I let myself melt into them. At one with my team. Where none of our mistakes mattered, just us.
I don't even feel myself fade out.