I wish I could put out as many stories as FTDS, he's such a great writer and I'm absolutely loving PPP

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Highschool DxD

"Okay, Kuroka... Koneko... It's time I help set everything straight with you two." Naruto said seriously as he looked at the two sisters across from him.

"And how are you gonna do that exactly, nya?" Koneko asked.

"You two are gonna hold my hands!" Naruto said happily.

"That's... it, nya?" Kuroka looked confused.

"Yep! Although, I'm gonna make a clone do that for me... I have something else to do that I should really take care of sooner rather than later..." Naruto scratched his head in annoyance.

"Ophis?" Kuroka asked.

Naruto nodded his head, "Sasukeeeeee!"

"What do you want?" Sasuke poked his head into Naruto's room.

"Send me to the Dimensional Gap please, next to Ophis."

"Hn." Sasuke grunted and gestured to the portal on his side.

"Thanks! I'll be back as soon as possible!" Naruto made a clone before stepping through the portal.

The Dimensional Gap...

"Naruto, I'm surprised to see you here... Why are you in your glowing form?" Ophis asked, floating lazily around him.

"Because I'd die...?"

"Ah, yes... Sometimes I forget about that."

"Right... Anyway, I wanted to ask you to stop giving other beings your snakes."

"Are they causing you trouble?" She tilted her head.

"Not me per say. But they do bother people I know and that might end up involving me so I came to ask you to stop. You don't actually need those people anyway."

"Hmm, I guess you are right."

"Can you take what you gave them back?"

"No."

"Why?"

"Because I don't remember who I gave them to."

"How do you not remember something like that?"

Ophis shrugged, "They're all insignificant bugs who don't deserve any space in my mind. They should be grateful that I even gave them my snakes in the first place."

Naruto facepalmed.

"But I do promise to stop."

"Good... I'd also like for you to come live with me now. It's really hard to know what you're up to or if you're okay if you keep coming here."

"Ah, if you insist..."

"Alright! Let's get going then!"

"Before we do that..."

"Hm?"

"I want you to impregnate me."

"Eh?"

"I've waited long enough and I will only go back with you if you give me a child."

"R-Right now?"

Ophis nodded.

"What about Great Red?"

"He's off somewhere else. He was being a pest as always but as soon as I told him you would impregnate me he quickly left."

"Okay... There's no bed though. This is just endless space, Ophis."

"I don't mind. We won't be leaving until I'm pregnant."

"Hmmm, I don't really have a choice do I?"

"Correct."

Naruto sighed, "Let's get this over with."

2 days later...

"Holy fuck..." Naruto groaned as he collapsed in front of everyone having breakfast.

Almost instantly everyone rushed to his side. Except for Sasuke.

"Are you alright, Naruto?"

"What's wrong?"

"Why are you so drained of chakra, nya?"

"Man, you're sweating hard."

Naruto groaned again, "Too loud..."

"It's okay, let me help..." Asia squatted in front of him to heal him.

"Oh man, I can't even bear to look at your panties... And you're sporting such an awesome cameltoe." He sobbed slightly.

Asia blushed at the comment but focused on solely healing him.

"I don't think that's the only thing that needs healing..."

"What do you mean?" Xenovia asked.

"My dick... It's broken..."

"No way!" Xenovia quickly got on the ground and pulled Naruto's pants down.

Sasuke choked on his cereal as he looked at his friend's deathly looking penis.

Rossweisse panicked and quickly began performing the Heimlich maneuver on him.

All the girls looked down at Naruto's flaccid penis.

"That looks pretty bad..." Grayfia commented.

"Maybe if I suck it that'll make it better?" Xenovia suggested.

"Are you insane?! Look at it!" Irina pointed in embarrassment, "It's discoloured!"

"Akeno can suck the magic out of people, maybe she can suck it back to normal, nya." Koneko said.

"I would prefer not to use my dick anytime soon but I'm willing to try anything."

"I'll go get her, nya. Hang tight." Koneko said before leaving hurriedly.

"I could heal it a little bit... Or I could try at least." Asia suggested.

"Just do something about it, please."

Asia nodded meekly, "I will have to t-touch it though."

"Whatever you must."

"What exactly happened anyway?" Xenovia asked as she got up again.

"Ophis." Naruto groaned as Sasuke coughed by the table.

"I could've died... To a bowl of cereal..."

"What did that Dragon want, nya?" Kuroka asked.

"To get pregnant."

"And you did it?!" Ravel's head burst into flames.

"She made sure I did anyway. Probably enough times to make everyone in this room pregnant multiple times." He cried.

"Now I'm so wet." Xenovia squirmed.

"Not the time!" Irina smacked her.

"She just wouldn't let go. I feel so vulnerable now."

"Where is she now?" Ravel asked in annoyance.

"Passed out in the Dimensional Gap."

"So she's just floating around from being fucked silly, nya?" Kuroka blinked.

"Pretty much."

"That sounds kinda fun actually." Xenovia said.

"I just want to sleep now..."

"Don't worry, I'm here now!" Akeno burst through the door panting.

"I've never seen you run so fast in my life..." Koneko said from behind her.

"I don't know any healing spells that require me to suck something but I'm a very fast learner and in the meantime I can use my hands!" Akeno declared, "Oh jeez, now that I take a look at it that does look pretty bad. Definitely not normal."

"Okay, let's get you to bed, nya." Koneko slung Naruto over her shoulder and carried him to his room, "Everyone who is not gonna be healing him or has no way to do so back the fuck away."

"Can you even help heal me, Koneko?" Naruto asked groggily.

"Shhhhh, don't talk now." Koneko rubbed his back as she let the girls who would help heals him into the room.

This included Asia, Akeno and Kuroka.

"Yo, fried chicken! Make yourself useful and make a tear or something!" Koneko said before shutting the door.

"Why that little..."

"What do we do?" Irina asked.

"I don't know, I kinda just wanted to watch..."

"I'll go make him some food, he must be starving." Grayfia said as she made her way to the kitchen.

"Where are you going, Sasuke?" Irina asked, as she watched him make a portal.

"I'm going to bleach my eyes out, carve them out and burn them and then put them back in with hopes that I can unsee what I've seen. If that doesn't work then I'll figure something else out."

I was thinking of what to write for a while so I just said fuck it and decided to write this shit. I just felt like writing something short and silly.

Ophis is pregnant. Yay, good for her! Poor Naruto though.

Time to think of some baby names!

Hope you enjoyed this random ass shit.