Chris: Last week on Total Drama Fandom Island, seventeen contestants went to Boney Island for the suckiest camp-out EVER! Pestered by the local fauna and by each others attempts to prank the others led to an arms race for defenses that saw the Killer Bass rise on top and the Gophers lacking! In a close vote, our resident Crystal Gem was sent packing!
This week, we revisit one of our most memorable challenges, as we've upgraded "Phobia Factor" into a more grueling version of itself today! Will our sixteen remaining campers cower and run? Find out right here on TOTAL! DRAMA! FANDOM! ISLAND!
[The theme song plays.]
Dear Mom and Dad I'm doin' fine, you guys are on my mind [Patrick wakes up under the lake, pulls a Krabby Patty out of his pocket and eats it, burping and creating a small tidal wave towards the beach], you asked me what I wanted to be [Arthur and Sasha are having a picnic on the beach just as the tidal wave hits them] and I think the answer is plain to see, I wanna be famous [Cyborg is recharging himself with a solar panel array when the weather suddenly turns Arctic. Cut to Gray laughing and Hermione shaking her head] I wanna live close to the sun [Darcy is looking for the Immunity Idol on the river riding Amethyst, shape-shifted as a canoe. They fall into the waterfall]. Go pack your bags cause I've already won [Sans is standing asleep on a log, blipping out of the way just in time as Mabel rappels across with her grappling hook], everything to prove nothing in my way [Mabel slams into the outhouse, causing Seraphine to fall out], I'll get there one day. [Brian and Raymond, tied up, look on in horror as Chef serves them 'mystery meat', meanwhile Bakugou is armwrestling an arm of sand conjured by Gaara next to him. Bakugou loses.] Cause I wanna be famous. [LSP and Ponyhead are taking selfies by the steps on the beach] Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na! [Baljeet is writing on his organizer while Lisa is playing her saxophone as fireworks go off in the sky] I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous, I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous [At the campfire, Jett and Jason are about to kiss when Barry pops up and fines them] (Whistling in tune)
Italic means Confessional!
[All sixteen campers are gathered around a bonfire]
Jett: Gee, it's all gotten so quiet since Amethyst left
Ponyhead: I'll give it to her, she knew how to keep a convo GOING. Like now what? We're floating in dead air here?
Arthur: Well, let's not cry over spilled milk hre, I daresay we can think of something interesting to talk about. How about fears?
Darcy: Sure, talk about your fears while a freaking Dark Witch is standing right next to you. What a bunch of idiots!
Ponyhead: Ooh, I love this game, I'm totally scared of just one thing and that's TACKY CLOTHES!
Raymond: Hear, hear!
Darcy: I'll admit, I'm not much scared of anything, it comes with the territory, but if you told me I had nothing but last year's stuff in my wardrobe, I would drop DEAD. And you, Seraphine?
Seraphine: I can't stand conflict. It gives me attacks
Arthur: My kind cannot avoid conflicts, but I am very revulsive of frogs. It's an, ah… historical thing
Jett: I hate losing. When I'm on a losing streak, I start getting all flaky
Cyborg: I hate the dark!
Baljeet: Same here!
Mabel: Claymation gives me the creeps!
Lisa: Well, I can't stand the feeling that I might get a failing grade!
Sans: I don't like getting touched. It's a… touchy issue
Sasha: Sans, I am going to strangle you, but for real, I'm claustrophobic
Barry: I have FOMO. I simply can't stand the possibility of missing out on something that's important to me!
Gaara: Jason?
Jason: Bricks
Gaara: Pardon?
Jason: You heard me. I'm scared of bricks
Barry: Flying is weak to Rock, and you're part-Electric, so you're not scared of lightning either
Jett: I don't think it's a typing thing, Barry. How about you, Gray?
Gray: I'm not scared of anything
Darcy: Everyone has a fear, Gray. Even magic users
Lisa: Is it something more… specific?
Gray: [blushes]
Gray: Fine, I have a very specific fear of… dakimakuras. Body pillows. Ones that have my friend Erza on it
Lisa: I think dakimakuras creep out everyone
Seraphine: A fan of mine once showed me a me dakimakura and I banned him faster than lightning
Darcy: Usually, it's us girls who'd be scared of the idea that somewhere out there some smelly fat incel is cuddling to a likeness of her, but what's with you?
Gray: The line of dakimakuras made in Erza's image uses an… uncanny design of her. Like she's going to come out of the pillow and give you a beatdown when you're asleep
Darcy: Well… Erza Scarlet is definitely terrifying right? I wouldn't pick a direct fight with her
Arthur: Absolutely. That woman manhandled a Durmstrang professor at the Wizards Summit the other year, shaking off half a dozen Stunning Spells like they were nothing!
Jett: Do you hear something?
[The campfire flickers off, and a maniac with a chainsaw jumps out!]
Everyone except Gaara: [screaming and scrambling]
[The maniac takes off his mask, revealing Chris]
Sasha: Chris, what in the Three fucking Sisters?!
Darcy: Let's get ONE thing straight here, Chris, I do the spooking around here!
Raymond: [lying on the ground, foaming at the mouth and legs kicking in the air]
Mabel: Oh, no, Rayray, I think you have rabies
Chris: [cackling] I see our resident shinobi is unfazed!
Gaara: I saw you sneak in five minutes ago
Sans: I just happened to be at a bad angle
Chris: Well, in any case, Gaara, you now have Invincibility!
Lisa: WHAT?!
Darcy: Just like THAT?!
Chris: Our challenge this week is all about fears! And if my Gemmy-Award winning stunt as the "Chainsaw-wielding maniac" didn't faze him, nothing will! Meet me at the campf-
Lisa: We're already here
Chris: Oh, well in that case, let's get started! This week's classic challenge involves facing your fears! Face them, and win a point for your team! Chicken out, and you get NO points, and your teammates will vote you out later on for sure!
Darcy: How convenient that everyone just so happened to blurt out their secret fears? Chris, you're viler than Valtor… I like that!
Chris: Thank you! Everyone has an assigned spot for their fears! Darcy, Raymond and Ponyhead have the same fear, so they have the same spot! So do Cyborg, Baljeet and Sasha! You must DEFEAT your fears, guys, to win the challenge!
Chris: [to the audience] They'll never guess WHO's in store for them!
Gray: I swear, this feels like the S-Class examinations
Lisa: Exams?! I-I didn't study! Wait, I- [hyperventilates]
Mabel: Get a grip!
Jett: Whatever they've got, we can handle it, right guys!
Arthur: Absolutely! Oh, wait, enemy team. I mean, you might find it difficult!
Gaara: And hopefully, Darcy, you won't waste your time pulling tricks again
Darcy: Watch your own back, Mr High-and-Mighty!
Sans: The two divas are having a spat because they stole each other's mascara
[Grounds]
Jett: OK, what's the big deal here?
Sky: [triple backflips out of a tree]. The deal is that you'll face me in a gymnastics routine, and you'll LOSE!
Seraphine: Who's there?!
Gwen: YOU are going to sit through the messiest party ever!
Leshawna: Yeesh, who invited Becky-with-the-bad-weave?
Anne-Maria: OH, YOU ARE GOING DOWN, FLOPPIN-THEE-STALLION!
Seraphine: Oh dear…
Mabel: I'm warning you, I know karate!
Harold: Have you ever heard of the story of Darth Alejandro the Cunning? I got all the clay figures for the play!
Mabel: [infernal screaming]
Lisa: There is nothing to fear but fear itself
Cameron: Hypothesis refuted! There's this pop quiz you forgot about!
Lisa: AAAGH!
Barry: So all you're gonna do is strap me down to this chair?
Cody: Yup! Oh, gotta go, there's this Shiny Jirachi giveaway online. You know there's only four of those in existence, right?
Barry: [screaming and foaming at the mouth]
Darcy: There's no use hiding!
Raymond: Yeah, what she said!
Ponyhead: Show yourself!
Lindsay: [giggling] Oh, I'm not sure you'll like what I've got for you guys! Brick arranged these outfits himself. Isn't he a dictionary?
Ponyhead: Visionary. OF THE MOST HORRIFYING EXCUSES FOR CLOTHES IN EXISTENCE!
Lindsay: Oh. Well, there's the dressing room! I'll get my camera!
Darcy: The Ancients are testing me today…
Jason: Hello?
[brick flies over his head]
Brick: You're wide open for attack, soldier! I expected more from the leader of the Twelfth Legion!
Jason: Oh yeah? Why don't I sho- [gets hit by brick] Why don't I sh- [gets hit by another brick] Why do- [gets hit by ANOTHER brick]. That's ENOUGH!
[Brick throws an entire WALL of bricks at Jason with a special catapult]
Jason: Oh no…
Arthur: Who goes there?
Beth: Oh, it's just me, Mr. Kirkland, and my very special friends [ribbit]
Arthur: [screaming]
Gray: Who's there?
Jo: [stuffed inside an Erza Dakimakura] It's me, Erza, ya dingbat! Get ready, coz I'm piling on the smooches!
Gray: [screaming]
Cyborg: Hello?
Baljeet: Is there
Sasha: Anyone here?
[The ground beneath them shakes, revealing a giant box that folds up and traps the three of them inside its dark interior]
Max: MWAHAHAHAHA! YOU FOOLISH HEROES HAVE FALLEN TO MY INGENIOUS TRAP!
Sans: Pfft, like they got someone who can chase down a guy who can teleport- AAGH!
Scarlett: Perhaps! But with my quantum entangling ray, I can anchor my good assistant to you, enmeshing you together in the spacetime continuum, even when you blink to another location!
Sans: Ouch, welp, you got me
Scarlett: And my friend over here LOVES to cuddle!
Dawn: You're hiding some awful childhood traumas. Would you like to talk about them, or would you like to hug them out?
Sans: I'm not ready to have a bad time…
WHO WILL WIN THE CHALLENGE? VOTE ON REDDIT!
r/Totaldrama/comments/u4yunq/sixteen_campers_all_with_their_own_personal_fears/
Chris: Let's see how our campers are doing! Hope they're still alive…
[The camera pans out to the map of Wawanakwa]
Chris: Interns! Status Reports!
Brick: Jason [cough] has successfully [cough, sputter] conquered his fear of bricks
Chris: Fantastic! One point to the Gophers!
Brick: But now I have a fear of lightning…
Chris: Beth?
Beth: Chris? Arthur's in a coma!
Chris: Oh, too bad. No points for the Bass there! It's 1-1 so far! Lindsay?
Lindsay: Hi, Chet! Daisy and Reiner passed the test, Baloneyhead… she ran off into the woods…
Chris: That's 3-1 in favor of the Gophers! Jo?
Jo: Hello, Chris? This loser's passed out cold
Chris: 3-1 it still is! Gwen?
Gwen: Chris, we might have overdone it with Seraphine…
Leshawna: Move, people, give that white girl some breathing room!
Chris: And Harold?
Harold: Mabel LOVES my collection. She's starting her own collection now, too!
Chris: Great! That's 4-1! Max?
Max: Mmm, yes, Christopher, those puny heroes didn't stand a chance against my evil box! The cyborg and the schoolboy are out cold, yet I am chagrined to see the girl holding on
Chris: Sasha makes it a 4-2! Scarlett?
Scarlett: Well, Chris, I didn't succeed in breaking the bone-man, but I did get to document a successful psychotherapy session
Dawn: You've made great progress in unburdening yourself!
Sans: Thanks! I've already got enough with a team to carry, hehe
Chris: And Sans makes it 4-3! Cameron?
Cameron: Lisa's… losing it
Lisa: I AM THE LIZARD QUEEN! [faints]
Chris: Sky?
Sky: Well, I guess Jett can really reach new heights when she sets her mind to it. She wins!
Chris: AAAND that's it! The Screaming Gophers win this week's challenge, 5-3!
Jason: Well done, guys! Our team lives to see another day!
Gophers: [cheering]
Gaara: The important thing is that you tried
Arthur: [kicking rocks] BLOODY, DAFT, FROGS
Arthur: Oh, not you people, I was referring to the actual frogs
Sasha: I guess one of us is going home
Cyborg and Baljeet: [hugging in terror]
Ponyhead: Alright, let's get this over with, I want to get to my wardrobe!
Gray: And I need an ice pack. That crazy Jo tackled me off a cliff
Gaara: …and, where is she?
[On the foot of the cliff]
Jo: Gray? Where are you? We're not done yet here!
Cody: [running in the background] OH MY GOD, I FORGOT BARRY!
Barry: I AM FINING YOU LIKE NO ONE ELSE HAS EVER BEEN FINED, DO YOU HEAR ME?!
Chris: Alright, Bass, time to cast your votes!
Gaara: Cyborg, Baljeet and Ponyhead did cost us the challenge
Arthur: Three for Ponyhead. There was nothing stopping her from winning her challenge with Darcy and Raymond
Sasha: Three for Ponyhead. Somebody lied to her several times, told her she was fly, and cute and funny… and she's nothing like that. She's nothing of the sort
Cyborg: OK, I know this is every mans for himself now, so, sorry not sorry, three for Baljeet
Baljeet: Three for Cyborg. If it comes down to the two of us, I'm out for sure
Ponyhead: Arthur, Cyborg and Baljeet, like come ON! You guys got easy ones!
Gray: Ponyhead, Cyborg and Baljeet
Sans: Arthur, Cyborg and Baljeet
Chris: Gaara! Gray! Sans! Sasha! You guys got no votes!
Gaara: Thank you
Gray: Thanks, I know I fucked up back there
Sans: Hey, I do what I can for the team
Sasha: Thank you so much, guys!
Chris: Arthur, you got one vote
Arthur: Now, who could THAT vote be?
Ponyhead: [sips drink]
Chris: Cyborg, Baljeet and Ponyhead, you are this week's nominees!
Ponyhead: Again?! These fools are so annoying! You know what to do, Starmewnity!
Cyborg: Y'all better not let me go home now! I'm on a roll!
Baljeet: Oh, please, give me another chance! This challenge just wasn't suited for me!
Vote on Reddit!
r/Totaldrama/comments/u7wwjg/the_gophers_score_a_narrow_victory_over_the_bass/
Chris: Alright, campers! The votes are in! Cyborg, Ponyhead and Baljeet, you're all on the chopping block because you all failed what were supposed to be very simple tasks!
Ponyhead: Hey! Don't go invalidating our phobias, Chris!
Chris: Ma'am, you are terrified of tacky clothing. I rest my case
Chris: You are safe…
[nervous clatter]
Chris: BALJEET!
Baljeet: Oh, thank you! Thank you! I swear I won't let my team down again!
Cyborg: Well, Ponyhead, I guess it's either you or me
Ponyhead: Oh, why did it have to come down to this?!
Chris: The one with the most votes to evict is….
[Cyborg "holding" Ponyhead]
Chris: PONYHEAD!
Ponyhead: [sighs]. I guess there's nothing left for me to do but… THIS! [pulls out Invincibility Idol]
[collective gasping and groaning]
Darcy: I thought they were gonna get rid of her!
Arthur: I knew it was too good to be true
Sasha: I could've sworn it was Baljeet who got the Idol!
Chris: It's not against the rules to steal the Idol once someone else has found it! Ask Alejandro and Heather. Okay, maybe not Heather, she'll kill you…
Baljeet: I knew that was what I got for hiding it under a pillow… but did Ponyhead go into the Boys' Cabin?!
Ponyhead: Please, I sneak in there every night!
Chris: Cyborg, I'm sorry, but since Ponyhead invoked her Idol, that means the second-highest voted contestant is out. Which means YOU'RE out!
Cyborg: Oh, man! And I was on a roll!
Cyborg: Looking back, it was a really good time! It might not have ended with me having the biggest, BADDEST, victory PAR-TAYY in history, but at least I got to hang out with some of the chillest players in the Multiverse! Move your action figure collection off my bed, BB. Your brotha-from-anotha-motha is going home!
[Everyone gathers at the Docks as the T-Jet arrives to pick up Cyborg]
Jett: Is that the Teen Titans, for real?!
Arthur: The Go! iteration. I'll pass
Starfire: Oh, Cyborg! Your performance at this event has not been short of the wonders!
Beast Boy: Yeah, dude! When you scored that triple on those guys at Dodgebrawl?! That was sick!
Raven: Didn't even Merge. You three owe me twenty dollars each
Jett: Literally all of y'all have faithless friends
Robin: CHRIS! You will be considering making me a contestant for Action, right?! It'll be like getting my own movie!
Chris: Eh, you strike me more as a Pahkitew contestant
Raven: Translation: He thinks you're weird
Cyborg: Bye guys! Promise you'll have a big par-tayy in my memory, mkay?!
Ponyhead: [honestly crying]
Arthur: We will, old chap
Sasha: We won't forget you!
[The T-Jet takes off into the horizon. Fifteen campers remain]
Chris: One more Immunity Idol is somewhere in the Island, in the hands of one of our fifteen remaining contestants! What sort of drama and power plays will happen around that gorgeous wooden me? And how will our fifteen campers handle the ever-more-deadly upgraded version of "Up The Creek"? Find out next week on TOTAL! DRAMA! FANDOM! ISLAND!