(Or "Tricks are for kids!")
"WELL THE LAST TIME YOU WERE HERE, BULLWINKLE WAS DISTRAUGHT OVER NOT GETTING HIS RABBIT TRICK, AND SO, HE DECIDED TO GET BETTER TRAINING."
"Yep, this looks like the place!" Bullwinkle exclaimed, looking at a sign reading "MAGIK HALP MÜSE EES FREE."
"ROCKY AND BULLWINKLE ENTERED THE DECREPIT OLD BUILDING AND SAT DOWN IN A SEMI-ABANDONED OFFICE."
"Ve vill see yu now.." a female voice spoke, with a deep Eastern-European accent.
"ROCKY AND BULLWINKLE ENTERED THE DOOR INTO THE ROOM WHERE THE WOMAN WAS PRESUMABLY IN. SUDDENLY, A RATHER SHORT, PASTY MAN (obviously Boris, but don't tell them) IN A TUXEDO APPEARED BEFORE THE MOOSE AND SQUIRREL IN A PUFF OF RED SMOKE."
"Who're you guys?" Rocky asked.
"I yam Harry Howdini, Dees ees my lovely assistant, MISS JILL LUSION!" Boris exclaimed, tipping his hat.
"A WOMAN, OBVIOUSLY NATASHA APPEARED WITHIN A PUFF OF SMOKE, WEARING A FEATHERED, PURPLE, VEGAS SHOWGIRL-STYLE OUTFIT."
"So, ve hear yu een need of gettink bunny out of hat?" Natasha asked, approaching Bullwinkle.
"Y-yeah." Bullwinkle replied. "Since you guys are such master magicians, you think you can help?"
"Sure, sure…" Boris replied.
"AND WITH THAT, BULLWINKLE'S MAGIC TRAINING BEGAN.."
("Abracadabra" by the Steve Miller Band plays)
"I heat up, I can't cool down
You got me spinning
'Round and 'round
'Round and 'round and 'round it goes
Where it stops nobody knows"
The first portion of Bullwinkle's training was…sawing himself in half.
"Are you sure he's supposed to be doing this?" Rocky asked.
"Of course, dollink…" Natasha replied. "Ve AHRE professionals een dis bweesness."
Bullwinkle took the saw and began to cut the area in between both boxes he was placed into.
"Now say de vords…" Boris spoke.
"ABRA CADABRA-SKI!" Bullwinkle exclaimed. "HOCUS CROCUS! IN A GADDA DA VIDA!"
Then, he removed the tarp covering his body along with said boxes….to find his body completely sliced in half.
"Oh." He replied. "Good thing I got Medicare!"
"Every time you call my name
I heat up like a burning flame
Burning flame full of desire
Kiss me baby, let the fire get higher"
"AND TH' FLOWERS ARE STILL STANDIN'!" Bullwinkle exclaimed, removing a tablecloth and making perfectly sure a filled vase didn't break. "Now can we get t' doin' th' rabbit trick?"
"A leetle more trainink…" Boris replied.
"Abra abracadabra
I wanna reach out and grab ya
Abracadabra
Abracadabra"
After another hour or so, Bullwinkle was yanking multiple scarves from his tuxedo sleeves and making flowers appear within seconds.
"BIRDISTHEWORDICUS!" Bullwinkle exclaimed, making a flurry of doves appear from within his bare hands. "DANCIN' ON THE CEILINGUS!" He then pulled back a tarp, revealing a white tiger.
"I sink you're ready!" Boris exclaimed.
"Thank you so much.." Bullwinkle replied.
(*GROWL…*)
The tiger approached, growling and baring its teeth.
"One more thing…" Bullwinkle turned to face the tiger and blew some smoke at it. "WHATSNEWPUSSYCATUS!"
Within an instant, the tiger became a small, white kitten.
"MAKE SURE TO BE WITH US AFTER THIS SHORT BREAK FOR "Show me the Bunny" OR "Hip hip hop n' you don't stop"!"