{Normal POV}

(Saturday, June 3, 2023-2:15 pm)

[Haddock-Raseri Apartment]

Hayden was finally considered to be entirely recovered. Hayden finished physical therapy for the arm when he'd been shot. Hayden's ribs were better, and his wrist no longer broken. Everything else was just a scar now. Hayden did alright during April and May drill weekends. Hayden spent the three days with Troy gone trying to keep busy. Hayden didn't let anyone come over, but he texted a bit. The difficult times were at night because Hayden had to struggle in the darkness until he found something to bring him back, then he would be able to turn the light on and calm himself down. Troy knew of all these instances because Troy would call every morning to make sure Hayden was alright. And Troy would call at night around 9:30 pm before he went to bed to check in and remind Hayden that anything he saw was just a nightmare from the past; that he was home, safe and sound. Hayden managed the three days for both of those months and felt alright knowing he survived without a complete freakout. As soon as Hayden was given a clean bill of health in mid-May; he made the call to the corporate office for Barbarian Burger to get his former job back.

It began with Hayden coming in to receive a formal apology from the owners, and then one from his boss. Hayden got his work uniform that day too, and the manager told him what shifts to come in for. So for the last two weeks, Hayden has been working anything available between 8 am to 10 pm. Hayden's regular hours would be from 8 am to 3 or 4 pm. But the weekends were when he might come in later and work until 6 or 7 pm. Hayden and his boss didn't have any problems between them, and the staff who had framed Hayden a few years back no longer worked there, which made Hayden feel better about taking up employment in this place again. Hayden was usually given a day or two off, today was one of them. Also, Troy asked Hayden if he didn't mind everyone coming over to hang out yesterday, and though apprehensive, Hayden didn't want to take away from whatever Troy and the others did while he had been away. However, Hayden knew that everyone wanted to come over to see him since he hadn't wanted visitors while recovering, and didn't talk much if anyone was over. In fact, Hayden barely left the bedroom if people were over. And now as Hayden had learned, everyone was coming over. His parents, Gabriel, friends, Troy's parents, brother, Rosanna, Evelina, and members of the Inferno Platoon. This only made it more clear that Troy was trying to get everyone over to check on Hayden since he'd been pretty quiet and uninterested in a lot of things.

"Hayden?" Troy called while trying to locate his husband. Troy wandered into the bedroom to find Hayden shirtless and his back to him. Troy's eyes laid on Hayden's back, all the scars that Hayden never let him see while he was healing. Troy couldn't believe the damage; there had to be deliberate cut marks along the length, stabbings, burns, and what appeared to be whip markings based on the direction of some scars. Hayden pulled his shirt over his head and turned around, that's when he saw Troy standing at the entrance to the bedroom. Instantly, Hayden pulled his headphones out and looked either scared or ashamed to have been seen.

"H-How long have you been standing there?" Hayden asked.

"Just a few seconds," Troy replied.

"Di-Did you see anything?" Hayden averted his eyes off to the side, then the floor. Troy knew he could tell Hayden no to make him feel better, but Troy wouldn't lie to his husband. Hayden was very conservative since coming home; he didn't like people staring at him and wondering what he endured while captive to receive all the injuries he did. Troy had tried to make love to Hayden a few times in the last three months, but Hayden would always say he wasn't in the mood or too tired. Troy wondered if it had anything to do with the fact Hayden didn't want Troy seeing all the scars.

"I saw your back," Troy admitted as Hayden closed his eyes. Troy moved in closer to hug him, but Hayden moved away, shaking his head. "Hayden, it doesn't bother me,"

"It bothers me!" Hayden snapped. "I hate how I look because of it,"

"Why won't you tell me what happened, Hayden?" Troy tried.

"You saw. Why do I need to explain it?" Hayden remarked now.

"Because I want to help you, and I can't if you don't talk to me about what you're going through. I know about the PTSD, and that you suffered a lot, but I don't know any details about what you endured. You know it helps to talk, Love," Troy reminded.

"Yeah, well, I don't want to talk right now! I'm not ready to tell anyone the torture I endured. Two people know, and it's because I was forced to speak up or they wouldn't let me come home," Hayden said, glaring a bit with tears forming.

"Okay," Troy said softly, putting his hands up. "I'm sorry, babe. Please don't cry," he added. "We can talk when you're ready to. I just want you to be alright, and know that I'm here for you. I was only coming in to let you know that everyone is starting to arrive,"

"I'll be out in a minute…" Hayden looked away. Troy sighed, then he turned and left the room. Hayden sat on the edge of the bed, then he buried his face into his palms and cried silently.

. . .

[The Backyard]

"Where's Hayden, Troy?" Cole inquired. It had been twenty minutes, and Hayden was still inside the apartment on the bed. Troy had peered in quietly after everyone arrived and saw him there. Right before Troy could answer, Hayden walked out wearing dark blue jeans, sneakers, and a red long-sleeve.

"I'm here," Hayden said. Troy walked over and kissed Hayden's cheek.

"It's good to see you, son," Spencer smiled, greeting Hayden with a hug, then Vivian did the same. Rachel and Dustin were after them.

"Still can't do nothing with that hair, can ya?" Gabriel teased, ruffling Hayden's auburn hair.

"Never could," Hayden replied, then hugged his Godfather/Uncle. Hayden said hello to everyone else with little hugs or handshakes depending on who it was. For Inferno; it looked like they all came out except Grant, Maria, Jannike, Amber, and Eira.

"Hey, am I late?" came a familiar voice. Hayden turned to see Cody show up.

"Not at all," Troy said.

"Sweet. Hi, Hayden," Cody greeted after shaking Troy's hand.

"Hi," Hayden responded.

"How are you doing?" Cody inquired. Hayden shrugged with a tilt of his head. "As good as can be expected after everything, huh?" Hayden nodded. "You'll get through it; you're one of the strongest guys I know,"

"Doesn't feel that way sometimes," Hayden sighed.

"Not to you, no. But everyone else around who has seen what you can do is able to see that inner strength. You'll be fine with time; just gotta remember why you didn't give up then and let it be the reason you don't do it now," Cody offered with a smile.

"I'll keep that in mind. Thanks, Cody," Hayden gave a small smile.

"Anytime, my friend," Cody nodded. "Now, let's get this party started," he chuckled.

"I'm sure Hayden has music covered," Briana giggled. Hayden docked his phone into the system and pulled up one of his random playlists. After that, everyone just relaxed and talked to one another. Hayden was actually having a decent time too.

. . .

A couple of hours passed bringing the time to 4:10 pm. Troy was about to start cooking when the music was interrupted by ringing. Hayden looked at the phone to see the name as; Work. Hayden tapped the answer icon.

"What's up, boss?" Hayden said.

"Oh, Thank Odin you answered, Hayden. Could you possibly come in, like now?"

"Mad rush?" Hayden inquired.

"That and my daughter got into an accident; she's in the hospital, so I have to go,"

"You're the only manager; you can't leave unless you call in Mike or Andy,"

"Neither of them are answering. You can act as manager in my place, Thor knows you have the skills to do it. You know every position in this place, and how to run a shift. I'll leave you my numbers to use for manager override. Please? Just a few hours until I know how my daughter is doing?"

"I'll be there in eight," Hayden said.

"Thank you! You're a lifesaver!"

Hayden ended the call, then pulled his phone off the dock and prepared to go inside. After three minutes, Hayden came out wearing black pants, his non-slip shoes, blue and black t-shirt tucked into the pants. "Guess I'll be back in a few,"

"We'll be here," Troy said smiling, coming up behind Hayden and wrapping his arms around Hayden's waist to hug him. Troy went in to kiss Hayden's cheek, but something was wrong. Hayden's figure stiffened, and he started shaking. "Hayden?" No answer. "Hayden, what's wrong?" Cody got in front of Hayden and saw that his eyes were wide, and he was breathing hard.

"Shit. Troy, let him go, now; he's in a flashback," Cody ordered. Troy released Hayden and backed up. Hayden brought his hands to his head-shaking it side to side, closing his eyes tightly and hitting his knees with his head down.

"What did this? Me hugging him?" Troy asked.

"Had to be that; he was fine before. It must have triggered him to remember something from when he was captured. I don't know. I told you, I don't know what happened to him," Cody reminded. After a few more minutes, Hayden ended up sitting down with his knees pulled up and arms locked around them.

"Hayden?" Troy asked. Hayden lifted his head, still coming down from whatever he went through and taking in his surroundings. Troy knelt in front of him. "Please talk to me? Please tell me what happened to you?!"

"I don't want to…" Hayden forced out, still shaking a bit.

"No. No more of this, Hayden. You need to talk about it; this is destroying you. You can't sleep, you barely eat, and now, I can't do anything without worrying I'm going to put you in a flashback or PTSD attack. And it's because I don't know what's wrong or what happened. You need to talk!" Troy said, not yelling at Hayden, but needed him to understand how bad this was getting.

Hayden's eyes narrowed as he forced himself to his feet and clenching his fists at his sides. "I DON'T FUCKING WANT TO, TROY! I don't want to talk; I want to forget it ever happened!" he yelled, taking everyone by surprise. "You have no clue what I'm dealing with!"

"I would if you'd talk to me!" Troy tried again.

"And you told me earlier that you wouldn't ask me to talk until I was ready!" Hayden snapped. "Now you're demanding that I tell you; just like Henderson and that Psychologist did. You have no idea how hard it is to talk about. How much it hurts to have to think about. I said I would speak when I was ready, that way I don't have to risk freaking out. I'm tired of feeling this way, of breaking down, so I'm trying to work through shit in an attempt to be okay again; that way when I do tell you; I don't lose it. Stop fucking pushing me before I break beyond anyone's help!" Hayden ran away from them, getting in his car and driving down the street.

Nobody knew what to say or do. And no one felt worse than Troy did. Hayden was right; Troy told Hayden he would wait until Hayden was ready to talk, and he went back on that.

"Troy, it's not your fault. It's part of the PTSD and depression; you know that both are subject to outbursts of anger and sadness," Gabriel offered.

"I just wanted to know why my hug caused him to flashback to something from when he was captive…" Troy looked down.

"I've seen that kind of reaction before," Rachel piped up as they all looked at her.

"What do you mean?" Cody inquired.

"I'm a paramedic, and I've seen the reaction of freaking out like Hayden just did before," Rachel informed.

"And where have you seen that reaction? What was the cause?" Hailey questioned.

Rachel looked at Troy now, her eyes full of sympathy. "In abuse and rape victims."