Usopp rubbed a couple of bumps on his head (the price paid for sneaking a peek at the lovely navigator). "We looked all over the ship, but we didn't find anything. Whoever stole our clothes, it really looks like they disappeared."
It had been a rather traumatic awakening for the pirates. After making sure all their clothing was missing, including Zoro's underwear and bandana, they had to search the ship for the perpetrator (Robin had tried to help them with her powers, but she found nothing) between Nami's yells, Zoro's cursing and Usopp and Luffy's laughter. The captain had been the only one of the crew to enjoy it; to him it was like a hilarious treasure hunt. He hadn't even bothered to cover himself at first, but a couple of Nami's punches had forced him to change his mind.
Now they all sat in the ship's galley, wrapped up (including Robin, who, although she had used her powers at first to cover herself, had had to give up due to the effect it had on Sanji. The cook was already excited at the thought of the two girls' nakedness, but the sight of Robin covered only by her own extra arms had made him faint with joy. Chopper had had to work quite a bit to revive him) with some towels they had managed to find (the mysterious thief had also stolen the sheets). The only one not covered was Chopper. Being an animal, it was different for him.
The redhead gritted her teeth and slammed a fist on the table that shook the whole room. Her eyes shot up with blood and she began to growl.
Someone had stolen her clothes. Stolen. To her, the Cat Thief! It was she who robbed others, not the other way around! Whoever it was would pay dearly for it. Nobody could dare to rob her and think of getting away with it! "How is it even possible? Haven't you found any sign? Didn't you see a ship leaving?"
"U-Unfortunately not, Nami. I'm sorry." Usopp muttered.
Nami punched the sniper in the head, giving him another bump. "Is that all you can say, you idiot?!"
"Nami, don't blame Usopp. It's not his fault." Chopper timidly intervened.
The navigator sighed and turned to the reindeer. "I know, Chopper. But this is driving me nuts!"
"You shouldn't get so angry, it's bad for your heart. Try to stay calm."
"Stay calm, Chopper? After what happened! Someone stole my... our clothes!"
"Yes, but getting angry won't solve anything. We need to stay calm. Look at Robin."
Unlike Nami, Robin hadn't freaked out. Indeed, she didn't even seem embarrassed by the situation. "The Doctor is right, Miss Navigator. Being calm helps thinking logically."
"And how am I supposed to do that? They stole our clothes! If it weren't for these towels, we'd be buck naked! How can you be so calm?!"
The archaeologist just shrugged. "Nudity does not embarrass me." She rested his chin on the back of her hand. "Although I would rather avoid persistent stares..."
Sanji gasped and snapped to attention. "B-but of course, Robin-chan! F-forgive me for daring to lay my humble gaze on your divine beauty!"
"Actually, I was talking about the Captain."
Everyone's eyes turned to Luffy, only now noticing that he was staring at Robin's chest. But not in the way a man usually looks at a woman. More like... curiously, like a child who has just discovered something new.
"Stop looking at Robin, you pig!" Sanji said slapping his captain. However, the latter completely ignored him.
"Robin, what are those things on your and Nami's chest?"
There was a moment of silence, in which the pirates stared in amazement at the rubber boy.
"What… what kind of question is that?" Zoro said. He was used to his captain's weirdness by now, but still...
"They're called breasts, Captain. But usually people use synonyms, such as 'boobs'."
"And do the other women have them too?"
"Yes, all women."
"And what are they for?"
If possible, that question made the atmosphere even weirder.
"They are usually used by women to attract men, but their main purpose is to provide nourishment for newborn babies."
"And how do you do?"
"It's simple. The baby takes the nipple in its mouth... which would be a small dark protrusion in the center of each breast... and sucks the milk."
"A little dark..." He pointed to his chest. "Like the ones that men have here?"
"That's right, Captain. Men also have nipples, but in this case they are not used for breastfeeding. They are just to highlight the chest."
"Cool." said Luffy with a smile, and then added: "Hey Robin, could you give me some milk?"
Before Robin could even answer, Sanji promptly intervened. "YOU SHITTY RUBBER MORON! APOLOGIZE RIGHT NOW!" He then began to savagely kick Luffy, who reacted with a barrage of punches and his usual laughter.
Irritated by this, Nami jumped to her feet and banged her fists on the table. "STOP IT, YOU IDIOTS!" Unfortunately, she moved so abruptly that her towel fell down, exposing her naked body. She was so mad that she only noticed when she saw Zoro blush and Sanji, Usopp and Luffy faint with a gush of blood running out of their noses. She looked down, gasped, and hastened to cover herself as Chopper brought the three boys back to life. She sat down and scowled at the men of the crew. "You'd better forget what you just saw." she hissed threateningly.
Robin chuckled. "I didn't you were so modest, Miss Navigator."
Nami snorted. "It's not... oh, to hell with that! Let's not talk about it, okay?! Argh, what a mess!" She run her hands through her hair.
"Why are you even making such a fuss?" asked Zoro. He just couldn't understand why Nami was acting like that. He could understand the embarrassment of nudity, but the redhead was really exaggerating. Why couldn't she stay composed like Robin, or even Zoro himself? Although he was slightly embarrassed (not for himself, but for the two women. He wasn't a horndog like that damn curly brow, but he still unconsciously recognized their beauty, as proved by the erection he had had when Nami's towel had come down), he had remained impassive, as befits a real swordsman.
"Zoro is right." Usopp intervened. "We are friends, why should there be embarrassment in seeing each other like this? By the way, we already saw you once without clothes. Have you already forgotten what happened in the royal bath of Alabasta?"
Robin raised an eyebrow.
"What does what happened in the bathroom have to do with it now?! It was something totally different! By the way, you still owe me 100,000 berry each."
The archaeologist frowned. "Miss Navigator... do you perform other duties in this crew?"
"What..." The redhead took a couple of seconds to figure out which "duties" the brunette was talking about. "Oh no, Robin, it's not like that!" And she hastened to explain the circumstances in which she had used the Happiness Punch. By the end of the explanation, Robin's doubts about the mental health of her new companions began to increase, and she wondered again if joining them was a wise choice.
"Anyway, since there is no one else on board besides us, I would suggest..." Zoro began to say, but was interrupted by a banging noise coming from outside the kitchen door. "What..." More blows followed, and after that they heard a strange sound.
"Sounds like a bird's cry," Chopper said.
"I'm going." Zoro got up and went to the door, his nakama's eyes following him. Keeping one hand ready to draw a sword, he used his other hand to open the door. "So who..." There was no one.
"What the hell..."
Squak!
The swordsman looked down and saw a seagull perched on a small box.
"And where the hell do you come from?"
Squak!
"He said: my master sent me. There is something for you in the box." translated Chopper.
The seagull nodded, made another sound (which Chopper translated as "goodbye") and flew away. Zoro took the box and opened it.
"What's in there?" Nami asked.
Zoro went back to his companions and placed the open box on the table. Inside were two objects: an Eternal Pose and a sheet folded in two parts.
"An Eternal Pose?" Nami looked closely at the navigational instrument. "Hmm... it doesn't say anything. Let's see the sheet..."
She took the piece of paper and opened it. "Ah, it's a letter." She began to read.
Dear gentlemen and ladies,
My name is Erik, and I am the one who stole your clothes. I took them while you were sleeping, for a reason that, even if I explained to you, you would not be able to understand. Simple minds like you cannot understand a genius like me.
However, being a generous man, I have decided to give you a chance to get your clothes back. Go to the island the Eternal Pose will lead you to and try to overcome all the obstacles you will find. If you succeed, I will return your clothes. But beware: you are not the first, and all who have come before you have failed miserably.
Therefore, you can also decide not to accept my challenge. But if you accept, you will have to be very careful.
With this being said, I salute you and I hope you will accept. Sincerely yours, Erik.
The Straw Hat Pirates gasped in disbelief.
"But... what is it, a joke?" said Usopp.
"I'm afraid that's quite unlikely, Mr. Long Nose," Robin said.
"What kind of madman is this?" Sanji roared. "Besides, who the hell does he even think he is? 'Simple minds like you don't can understand a genius like me". What..."
"Shut up!" Nami yelled.
The Cat Thief took another look at the letter, then balled it up and hurled it away in anger. She dropped her fist on the table and stood up, holding the towel steady to avoid further accidents.
"Get ready, we are going to face this madman's challenge! We will take back our clothes and make him pay for it, and we will sho him who the Straw Hat Pirates are!" The anger seething from her was such that no one dared to contradict her. And anyway, they shared the assessment: they wanted to recover their clothes, and above all make the culprit pay for it. Therefore, they all nodded solemnly. The only one who reacted differently was Luffy.
"Come on, let's go find the thief!" He smiled and threw his fists in the air. His companions shook their heads: to their captain, this was just another great adventure. It was to be expected. But despite this peculiar side of his character, when he wanted he could be really terrifying. Of that they could be sure.