A/N: I was not a fan of Kim Possible simply because I was too old for it. Some strange turn of events brought the series to my radar at some point. I enjoyed some of the episodes and the movies and forgot about it. Some months ago, I stumbled onto it again by accident and was enraptured by Drakken and Shego's dynamic. There are no similar villains anywhere and I was particularly fixated on them since they reminded me of Joker and Harley to an extent. What do I do – of course, go to my favorite for a deep Drakgo dive. In no way was I planning to write anything for them since I was doing another fic at the time, but there was a plot line that was just there and nobody had used it for some reason so I decided to give it a try.
The difficulty here is that I found it was extremely complicated to write Drakken since he is so vocally and facially expressive. In my personal, humble opinion, he is on a spectrum as such brilliant people generally are, but I am not going there. I admit my version of Drakken is more mature and stable, comparing to the series, but still very sensitive.
Also one important matter; even if Kim Possible is a teens's series, I gave Shego a bit of a potty mouth since I just feel like she is not above expressing herself in that way. Frankly, I thought the whole thing will be three-four scenes, but then the back stories came out and all kinds of other stuff. There are generally two questions in Drakgo: why is Drakken blue and why does Shego always come back, to me it was also important why she leaves in the first place.
On another matter… Drakken's downfall started, when he couldn't find dates for his friends for a singles' mixer. Isn't it the point of the mixer to find dates there? Not to mention, the mixer was only for the scientific department, the majority of which is generally men. What were the series' writers thinking exactly?
The story is written mostly from Shego's POV, but there will be some parts from Drakken's POV and some other characters'.
Disclaimer: Kim Possible characters belong to Disney.
We Fail to Rise again
by Lady Arabella Malfoy
"Looky-look what I found in the trash bin!" Shego goaded, flapping a red colored piece of carton in front of her boss, who continued to stare at something or other she did not care about through the microscope, paying her zero attention.
"I am going to ignore the fact that you for some unknown to me – even if I am a genius – reason went through my trash, the same way as I am going to ignore you and whatever you are going to say next," Drakken grumbled, not moving even an inch from his microscope.
"But how can you?!" Shego continued in a song-song voice of TV commercial. "It is all red and the paper is of top quality! And this cursive script that is almost like real gold cordially invites Drew Libsky – 'Doctor Drakken' in brackets – to the alumni reunion of the Middleton Institute of Science and Technology."
"I can very well read myself, Shego!" Drakken spat, finally rising from the microscope and turning on his chair to face the woman, who dared to disturb his precious scientific work for pointless trivialities.
"So why aren't you RSVPing in triplicate? You were ki-" A frown from her boss. "Walked out of there, but you saved the world! Everyone wants a piece of that! All your life didn't you want to prove you are smarter than them?"
"HA! What a naïve girl you still are, Shego! The only reason they invited me is to mock my success. Saved the world? Well, wasn't it by accident? Have a plant growing out of your back? Doesn't it make you a freak? Oh, sorry, you became one when you turned blue, so maybe that is an improvement? Oh, NO! IT IS NOT! And they will go on and go on about their successes, their labs and contracts and how filthy rich they are. And about their wives and progeny and how golden they all are and what perspectives their angels have to be as successful as their parents! Blah!"
Shego blanched at Drakken's accusation of her naiveté, but had to agree with him (a first for sure) on everything else. "So what? They are clearly jealous, they were just hiding in their villas while you were abducted by aliens and then defeated them."
"I know that, but that won't make their words hurt less. Particularly when Possible will saunter over and say with that retortive smirk, 'So you managed to save the world, but still couldn't get a date?' I hate that man!"
"Wait… you are not going, because you don't want to go stag? And who am I? Chopped liver?!"
"Don't be absurd, Shego! No one will believe you to be my date! They'll think you are a high-end escort I am paying for. And they will be right, because you are here only because I am still paying you. Only a quarter of your previous salary since we are now government funded, but still. And no, I am not going there to be mocked for bringing an escort, thank you very much!" With that snapped declaration Drakken returned to his microscope.
Shego fumed at being degraded to a pretty much a prostitute although a tiny piece of her was flattered by the 'high-end' part. Since her boss's attention was yet again irrevocably lost, she left for the cafeteria where she could have a cup of latte. At least they had a properly stocked kitchen here. And 'here' was not another lair, but a research facility beside the Mexican border they agreed to move to after they were approached after the UN award ceremony. Well, Drakken was approached, Shego pretty much tagged along since she had nothing better to do and was regretting the decision with every passing day. Drakken was in a nerdy heaven being given a perfect lab and five young researchers he could boss around (which he relished and never missed the opportunity to do). They were doing something with plants, but Shego had no idea what it was and had no wish to do so. Her three-year contract stated that she was part of the security team, but the big guys with bigger guns, who patrolled the perimeter looked competent enough, although Shego had the impression they were not guarding them from the external threat, but keeping them from leaving the facility or committing any unlawful actions, which was also put into her contract. She didn't know what was supposed to happen in three years, but she was counting the days.
….
Later that day Shego approached Drakken in the cafeteria and slammed the invitation in front of him, almost spilling the ever present cocoa moo on the cursed piece of carton.
"We are going and that's it," she stated, gripping his lips together before he could voice his protests. "I already RSVPed for you and your girlfriend, who is me, if you need clarification on the matter. Consider this another plan for world domination. We will go there and we will crash those assholes, who ruined your life. And I get a couple of days of freedom outside these white walls, so that is beneficial for all parties involved. Now… this plan will not fail, because it is my plan, and you will follow it to a T, because otherwise you will be laughed out of your uni once again. And you don't want that, right?" Shego received only some grumbling noises in return, since she was still holding Drakken's lips closed. She rolled her eyes, at his inability to just nod his head and not complain just because it was her idea. "Do we have an agreement?" she asked, releasing Drakken, who was becoming more agitated by the moment.
"And what agreement is that exactly, Shego? You will hardly want to put it in writing, otherwise it will surely be found and exposed at the most inopportune moment."
"Inopportune? Uuuh, using big words, Doc? The agreement is simple – I will pose as your girlfriend at the reunion and you will take time and effort for us to become a believable couple to snub everybody there. So believable that even James Possible will swallow his tongue."
"As much I enjoy the visuals, I can't just drop everything, Shego, for this plan of yours. I have work-"
"World domination, Doc. Set your priorities. The reunion is in three months. We will meet every day at eight in the karaoke room."
"What for?"
"Despite your norm, revealing one's plan before it is completed is bad form that leads to things falling apart. As you very well know. Come tomorrow and you will see."
….
Shego was not fond of the karaoke room for obvious reasons. The newest one - it was the only stipulation the big wigs allowed in the contract and because it was again in her contract, Shego had to be present at all Friday karaoke nights. At first, she was sure, it wouldn't take. Surely the nerdy post grads, one of whom was a girl and Shego greatly disliked her (she didn't know why, but she didn't like her on principle), and other research and security personnel in the facility is not the group who belts tunes after the week of work. Unfortunately for Shego, she was wrong. Yes, there was no that many volunteers in the beginning, but after the fourth time, the karaoke night became the only way to release the frustrations of the unsuccessful week and the only form of entertainment in the facility isolated from the world. None will be hip hop stars in the near future, but their singing was tolerable enough for Shego not to suffer too much every Friday evening. The number of participants was usually large enough for her just to hide in the corner.
And yet she told Drakken to meet her in the accursed room, because it was the only quiet place in the whole building, where if not work was going on 24/7 then at least the guarding was.
Drakken appeared at 20:23, which Shego berated him for right away.
"Women hate men who arrive late, you do know that, right?" she snapped, when he flopped down onto the sofa near her. Near, but not beside her, clearly used to her fiery temper and her tendency to get physical in its expression.
"I had an experiment to finish-"
"Don't care. I said at eight, then you must be here at eight."
"Bossy-bossy," Drakken muttered under his breath, but then straightened to ask, "So what is this brilliant plan of yours?"
"All rom-coms show that whenever two people decide to pretend to be a couple they spectacularly fail because they don't get their stories straight."
"You watch rom-coms?!"
"Everybody does at one point of life, so zip it! We create our story in a way that nobody will be able to catch us in a lie, because we will be telling the truth or at least the truth we both know."
"And how do you think to accomplish that? Playing 20 questions?"
"Pretty much. Only it will be 1000 questions. Let's get started." Shego opened her notebook to look up the first question, but snapped it shut, hearing snickering from her present companion. "What's so funny?"
"So now you are the crazy person with lists?"
"This is a lot of information to organize, I can't hold it all in my head. I'll make you a copy later, because your notes are atrociously disorganized."
"Su-u-u-re, especially since you'd never read them and even if you did, you understood everything perfectly. My madness always had order."
Shego had to agree with Drakken, because she will never be able to understand the technical mambo-jumbo even if it was written in straight lines on a white board with detailed explanations. So who is she to say that his notes made so sense? But she will not admit to it out loud obviously. "Anyway…We met when I came to work for you five years ago-"
"Five years and four months."
"Oh, is it?"
"It is, Shego, I sign your checks, remember? I am painfully aware of their exact amount."
"Whatever, Doctor D. Five years and four months it is."
"It is you, who insists on the truth and nothing but the truth. Also… Shouldn't you be calling me something less professional since we are in a personal relationship?"
"Ri-i-i-ght," and he was, dammit! And why was he smiling at her in that weird way? "I'll call you… D. And before you even think about it – NO pet names! No 'dumpling' nonsense or whatever!"
"Okay-okay, no need to be a harpy, Shego. Men usually don't like that, you know? Get on with the story then."
Shego gaped for a moment, her speaking ability blocked by Drakken's audacity to talk back to her. Has success gone to his head or was there always Drakken who could stand his ground against her? Bizarre… "Anyway… We've gotten together three years… and four months ago-"
"Why exactly then?"
"Because any later would be unbelievable. Two years is more than enough to understand if there is any attraction, chemistry etc. If nothing happened in two years then it was not supposed to happen."
"Hmmmm," was the only response to her explanation.
"Now some basic questions. How old are you?"
"42 in six months. And I do expect a proper party. I will do the same for you in four months. You will be 31-32?"
"32, but don't mention it."
"Looking good for your age."
That comment did it! On instinct Shego kicked Drakken's hip, throwing him off the sofa.
"Sheesh, Shego, that's abuse. And it was a compliment, you know?"
"Well, you suck at it! Just let me get on with it and no interruptions!" She continued without receiving confirmation, because it was just her way. "You are an only child… Mother… What's your mother's full name?"
"Flora Annabelle."
"Nice name. Not that she is particularly nice… So she is retired from what?"
"Pediatrician."
"And Mister Libsky?"
"Who?"
"Your father, you doofus!"
"Never had one."
"But isn't your mother Mrs. Libsky? Did they divorce before your birth?"
"Nah, it was just for propriety's sake. She changed her maiden's name after I was born and we moved to a new place."
"And you know this how?"
"I asked when I was teased in school for not having a dad. She didn't tell the whole story, of course. I was only eight at the time."
"So what actually happened? One-night stand? Boyfriend ditched her?"
"Short-term affair with her married boss."
"Right…" It was the only response Shego could master at the shocking piece of Drakken's biography. And it explained so much… Drew Libsky had no male role model in his life, no wonder he grew up into a man-child with a mother, who dotted on him too much for anybody's liking, even his. And his biological father could actually still be alive, moreover, it was clear Drew inherited his smarts (which were clearly above average despite countless failed world domination plans and inventions) from his father's side. Could it be that Drakken didn't only want to prove himself to his college mates, but to his father as well, so he would finally be worth acknowledgement? Although, the man may not even know about Drew's existence.
Shego knew how hard it could be for a boy to grow up without a father due to her child development degree. She stretched out her arm to… pat him on his back or something in support, but then recalled that he disliked being touched. Because of his overbearing mother?
Shego's psychoanalysis was interrupted by, "What about your parents, Shego?"
The arm returned to holding the notebook. Thankfully, sitting on the floor as he was, Drakken didn't notice her failed attempt at providing comfort. Not that she ever was good at that, being evil and all. "Well…as you know the comet hit our tree house and we've gotten superpowers, but what you don't know is that was actually quite a fancy tree house because our family was filthy rich. Old money and so forth. The tree house was with multiple levels. The twins' part was so close to the ground that it was safe for the toddlers to play there. So the comet hit the property, but not the tree house itself or the main house, creating a crater that pretty much destroyed the driveway and the fountain. It was a grand mess. We were dosed with radiation, but we didn't know that right away, we were only children. Everyone on the property was: drivers, staff, our parents… We survived – they didn't."
"I am sorry, Shego."
And Shego believed Drakken's condolences to be genuine. She always blamed him for being overemotional, but at least he could show emotion where she refused to. Was she setting up her own plan to fail right from the start?