Author's Note: Sorry for the long wait! It doesn't take me that long to write these updates (I wrote this in like two hours), I don't know why I've been so slow. February was aromantic writing month (arowrimo) so I wrote like five stories for that. You can some of them out here on FFN but the rest of them are on my ao3 account. Unfortunately none of them are Warriors fics (I wrote for Naruto, Avatar the Last Airbender, Disenchantment, and Sanders Sides) but I'd still appreciated it if you checked them out.

"I want you to guide us to the clans, Dovewing."

"What?"

It was a few sunrises since the Kin attacked SkyClan. Dovewing was feeling… bad. Not as bad as Lionblaze or Jayfeather- she wasn't drowning in guilt like her former mentor or snapping at everyone like Jayfeather- but she still felt pretty bad for the role she played in the attack. She'd fought like any other cat but she was responsible for dragging Lionblaze and Jayfeather for that. That was just another thing she couldn't forgive herself for.

But they'd stuck around. They had nowhere else to go. Plus, Jayfeather had somehow ended up with a litter of kits on his paws and didn't seem inclined to abandon them anytime soon. Sticking around still didn't mean Dovewing was happy doing so though.

She didn't expect the Kin to be like that. Like this. How they were the night they attacked SkyClan. She knew that deep down she'd expected the Kin to be like a clan, however irrational that expectation was, and it hurt that they weren't. In reality, they were rouges. Not an honor bound fighting force, not a loving community, not followers of StarClan. Rouges. Dirty, honorless, wretched rouges.

But wasn't she just a rogue too?

It made her head spin. What was she, if not a warrior? One of the three, sure, but what were the three without clans to serve? What was any cat without a purpose? It was these questions that made her stay. That didn't mean her sense of morality was completely corrupt though.

"We need you to bring us to the clans, Dovewing," Darktail repeated. The two were standing off to the side of the group, though not out of earshot. When Darktail had asked her to speak with him, this hadn't been what she was expecting. If she knew, she would've asked to leave the warehouse. Maybe then she could yowl and hiss at him like she wanted.

"Darktail, no," she insisted, shaking her head. "You- What you did to SkyClan? Do you really think I'd be okay letting you do that to my- my- my kin? My friends? They may have turned against me but they're still my clan. I can't abandon them that easily."

"But that's not what I want you to do. I want to reform the clans," Darktail said so earnestly that Dovewing almost believed him. With so much regret in his eyes and shame weighing down his pelt, it was hard not to. "SkyClan was a mistake. By the stars, it was a big mistake. I didn't think- I didn't think- Dovewing, I didn't want to hurt them like that. You have to believe me."

"Don't tell me that. Tell them that," Dovewing snapped, angling her ears over to the corner where Jayfeather was trying desperately to feed the three tiny kits in his care. They weren't newborn but they didn't seem quite ready to eat prey yet and there were no queens here to nurse them. Jayfeather had resorted to chewing up prey and letting them lap it up but even that was difficult. And messy. Especially for a blind tom who wasn't terribly fond of kits.

Darktail sighed. "I will. When they're older. Old enough to understand. I'll tell them everything. I promise. I'm not ready to give up though. The clans, Dovewing, they're flawed. You know that, I know that. I can change them. I won't make the same mistakes as I did with SkyClan."

Dovewing was still far from caving. "Why do you care so much about the clans? How do you even know about them? I know you've never been to the lake. Did the clans hurt you when they still lived in the forest?"

"In a way," Darktail answered. He looked hesitant, opening his mouth before closing it again, and looked down at his paws. "I…"

Dovewing shouldered him with something that would be akin to friendliness if not for the tension buzzing between them. "Just tell me. I already told you I got driven out for being able to hear what's happening in other clans. Your story can't be worse."

"I'm- I'm- I'm… I- My father," Darktail stuttered out with considerable effort.

"What about your father? Did the clans kill him?"

Darktail shook his head. "He was one of them."

"Wait, what?"

"My mother, she lived in the twolegplace. My father visited her a lot but turned away from her when she told him she was expecting kits. She had a hard kitting and I was the only one who survived. She said this wouldn't have happened if the clans' borders were more welcoming. She tried bringing me to my father but he turned us away again."

"I'm sorry," Dovewing said softly. Of all the things, she hadn't expected this. She knew Tigerstar had taken a mate outside of the clans but he'd been banished at the time, right? Mating with a twolegplace cat was unheard of. Dovewing couldn't help but wonder which WindClan tom Darktail was talking about. Would it be one that she knew? Or maybe he hadn't made the Great Journey. She knew she couldn't ask though. Darktail probably didn't know and if he did, that wasn't something he'd want to share.

Darktail laughed bitterly. "Don't be. You did nothing wrong. My mother… She'd tell me about the clans, about their rules. When she died, she told me to get… I don't know if revenge is the right word but she died angry at my father. She was always so angry. Even when I wasn't. But when she died… I guess I got angry too but the clans were already too far gone for me to do anything."

"You don't want what happened to you to happen to any other cat," Dovewing realized aloud.

Darktail nodded solemnly. "Does it still happen?"

"I guess?" Dovewing ventured. She wanted to scratch her ear but she withheld. Her mother was half kittypet but Dovewing was still far from familiar with the discrimination half-clan cats faced. "Lionblaze, Jayfeather, and their sister are half-clan. That is, their parents are from different clans. It's forbidden to take a mate from another clan. The cat- The cat I love is from another clan too. We couldn't be together either and if we had kits, they wouldn't be accepted in either clan. Lionblaze and Jayfeather's mother managed to trick the clan for awhile but the clan found out eventually."

"And she was a medicine cat," a deep voice added. Dovewing jolted and turned to see Lionblaze approaching. He looked weary. Like he hadn't been sleeping well but it was more than that. "Medicine cats aren't allowed to have kits either. It's even worse for a medicine cat to have kits than it is for two cats from different clans to have kits. She lost her place as a medicine cat and Jayfeather had to take over on his own. It was meant to just be punishment for her but he suffered too. Hollyleaf left the clan altogether. And it took me a long time to regain the trust of my clan. I didn't even do anything. I was the same cat they'd always known but they looked at me- like- like-"

"A rouge?"

"Yeah. A rouge," Lionblaze finished. He looked at Darktail with an unflinching amber gaze. "You think you can change that?"

Darktail gestured loosely to the warehouse and all the cats within. "I have leadership skills. We have the numbers to be taken seriously and fight back if the clans attack. I think we can make change happen."

"I don't want more cats to die," Dovewing jumped in, glancing between them. "Can we do this without fighting?"

"Dovewing," Lionblaze said softly, looking at his old apprentice, "we're the three. We have the power of the stars in our paws. We can do anything."

"You have the power to fight."

"And you have the power to guide and warn," Lionblaze argued lightly, "and Jayfeather has the power to understand the hearts of cats and communicate with our ancestors. I'm just your back up. With Darktail, maybe we can do it."

Dovewing looked between Lionblaze and Darktail, recognizing something deep and powerful and honest in their eyes, and slowly nodded. "Okay. Okay, I will help guide you to the clans."

"Do you ever want any?"

"Any what?" Jayfeather asked as he stopped to try to keep Finkit from sliding off his back. It was the day after Darktail ordered the Kin to head out and, with Dovewing leading them, they set their paths for the lake. Jayfeather wasn't exactly keen on the idea, especially after Darktail dumped Finkit, Dewkit, and Reedkit into his paws, but he didn't have much of a choice. At least Raven and Lionblaze were willing to lend a paw when the kits got too tired to walk and demanded badger rides.

"Kits," Raven answered, walking with ease despite the kit on her shoulders. "You seem good with them."

Jayfeather snorted. "I'm terrible with kits. Besides, I can't have them. Medicine cats aren't allowed to have kits."

"Well, you're not a medicine cat anymore, are you?"

Jayfeather opened his mouth to give a snappy retort but his mind froze half way through coming up with a response. Raven was right. He wasn't a medicine cat anymore. He could have kits if he wanted but the thought of it just felt so wrong. Not only had it never been an option, the only cat he'd ever considered to be his mate had died long ago.

Plus there was the whole blindness thing. He had a hard enough time getting around as is, how would he manage with tiny kits under paw and constantly asking to play moss ball? And what if one of them inherited his blindness? He didn't think he'd be able to escape the guilt if that happened.

He tried to play it cool, tried not to show how uneasy the question made him. "I just don't think I'm meant to be a father."

"That's too bad," Raven responded before glancing at Lionblaze who was carrying Reedkit without the slightest trouble. "What about you? You've got good badger-riding shoulders. Ever think about getting your own kits to put up there?"

"You should!" Reedkit squeaked from Lionblaze's back. "You give the best badger-rides in the world! Your kits would be the luckiest kits ever!"

Lionblaze purred in amusement before sobering. "I'd like to. I have a mate back home, actually. It was kind of… hard getting together, with my powers and all, but we got to a good place before I had to leave. I'm not really sure how things are between us."

"I'm sure she misses you," Raven concluded with a nod. "You seem like a good cat, Lionblaze."

"You don't know either of us. How can you be sure?"

Raven shrugged, careful not to jostle Dewkit on her shoulders. "Just trying to make conversion. Traveling can be boring."

"Tell me about it," Jayfeather grunted. Finkit didn't seem to share his sentiment though.

"I know! Let's play I spy! Jayfeather, describe something you see and have us guess it."

"Well, I spy with my blind eyes something big and dark," Jayfeather responded sarcastically. It came out a bit meaner than he intended but his tone seemed to go over Finkit's head. He could feel the kit shifting on his back as his head swiveled around, looking for whatever Jayfeather was describing.

"I don't- Oh! Is it Raven?"

"I wasn't- Yes," Jayfeather sighed. By the stars, kits were dumb. "It was Raven, Finkit."

"Yes! I'm the best at this game!"

Jayfeather rolled his eyes the best he could in what he was pretty sure was Lionblaze's direction. The older tom purred and Jayfeather could feel the fondness rolling off him. Directed towards Jayfeather or the kit, the silvery tom didn't know but he couldn't help it when his lip quirked up into a smile. Maybe traveling wouldn't be so bad. Afterall, he had some good company.

Lionblaze found that he really liked traveling with the Kin.

Sure, he was still grappling in a losing battle with his guilt over what happened with SkyClan but it was hard to lose himself when Reedkit was always bouncing around him or clambering onto his shoulders. Lionblaze didn't have much experience with kits, save from when he was a kit himself, but it was strangely nice. It was kind of like having an apprentice but more fun. And he could let himself drift off into daydreams about what his and Cinderheart's kits would be like. Reedkit was a realistic reference point for how kits behaved.

By the stars, he missed Cinderheart. He couldn't wait to get back to the lake. Granted, he was part of a… colonization effort and he doubted she would take a liking to that but it had been moons since he'd seen her. It didn't matter how, he just wanted to see her again. Breathe in her scent, hear her voice, feel the softness of her fur against his muzzle- even just seeing her once more would be enough to satisfy him.

Lionblaze knew he'd probably not get to return to ThunderClan but he was okay with that. The Kin weren't all that bad. Codeless and fiercer than he was used to, they were still just a group of cats. Wasn't any group just a collection of individuals? It was getting easier to look past the group and just see the cats within it. And they were good cats, nothing like the heartless rouges he'd encountered so many times. He found himself getting used to them. He'd probably miss them if he had to leave them.

They weren't quite as excited as he was when they neared the lake. They didn't understand why Lionblaze felt so light when he began recognizing the terrain. They looked at him like he had bees in his brain when his joy gave him a sudden burst of energy and he paraded around with Reedkit cheering him on from his back.

They didn't understand his devastation when they finally arrived.

"We're almost there," Dovewing had said when things started to become familiar. "Maybe two sunrises away."

"You sound uneasy," Darktail had commented and Lionblaze agreed. There was something… off about her mew. "What's wrong?"

"I'm not sure," Dovewing told them hesitantly. "I can still hear cats there but it's… quieter. Something's different but I'm not sure what. I think we're going to have to get closer to find out."

Lionblaze had been confused but not concerned and he continued with his merriment. Even Dovewing's foreboding words couldn't dampen his mood. He was going to see his family and friends again. There was nothing that could prevent that, right? The clans were strong and sturdy. It was unfathomable that anything could happen to them in his absence. It wasn't even a thought that had entered his mind. And that willful ignorance was his downfall.

He didn't believe Dovewing when her mew became panicked a day later, rambling that something was wrong.

He didn't believe Jayfeather when he nearly collapsed, overwhelmed by the anguish he felt in Dovewing's heart.

He didn't believe it when they arrived at the lake and he saw the blood with his own eyes.

Author's Note: Darktail is super ooc in this but it's not completely out of the ballpark.

If you don't remember, badger-rides are what kits call piggyback rides. I know the term was introduced in Tallstar's Revenge but I'm not sure if it was used again after that. Also, canonically it has been confirmed Jayfeather's blindness is genetic. I'm not sure if the cats know that since none of Jayfeather's known family is blind but it says on the wiki, I think.

The next chapter will have a canon-typical amount of violence and death so be warned.

I made a tumblr btw. I'm not posting Warriors stuff atm but did make a separate blog so I can give status updates on stories. Having to tell you guys how far I am in chapters may help me actually write them once in a while. The mainblog is entity9silvergen and the sideblog is entityupdates.

Edited 5/13/2021: Minor edits cleaning it up a bit