vi. i only have myself to blame
it's another night of suffering for xiao as karmic debt seems adamant on making him suffer. the moon shines brightly, masking dihua marsh in a beautiful silver glow and though the yaksha wants nothing more than to admire the view, he is reduced to groaning in pain, hoping none of the inn's guests can hear his suffering; he wouldn't want a mortal to come up to him in worry.
it seems his wish wasn't granted however, as a familiar mop of light blue peeks up from the balcony below. xiao can see the blue of the young exorcist's eyes fill with worry for the yaksha and despite the pain, xiao can't help the little sigh that escapes his lips.
here is another mortal carrying with him memories of the butterfly.
the exorcist seems to contemplate on something before making a decision. he pulls himself up, sandaled feet landing on the inn's roof. the guardian yaksha has never had anything to say to the exorcist: he does not need the help of a mere mortal to dispel of demons. he isn't called the conqueror of demons for nothing.
(he also didn't need to fall for a mortal yet he did.)
"adeptus xiao," chongyun starts with a respectful bow. "good evening."
the adeptus says nothing in return, only grimacing in pain. the exorcist once again seems to be contemplating something before opening his mouth to speak.
"you seem to be in pain."
"it's nothing," he dismisses, looking away. "you don't need to concern yourself with adepti matters, mortal."
his words seem to do the opposite as the exorcist took a step closer. the pain lessens a little in turn but xiao will not state it out loud.
"i can't just turn my back on an adeptus, adeptus xiao. i promised i would help you."
xiao does not need to ask who he made the promise to. it seems the woman has thought of everything before her passing. yet she lingered around long enough to see him smile. foolish woman.
another sigh escapes his lips as he allows the exorcist to sit beside him. chongyun's features lightens considerably as he slumps down next to him and instantly the karma vanishes, leaving no trace. xiao feels so much better already. he may not say it but chongyun's pure yang energy never ceases to amaze him.
chongyun doesn't look at him. instead his gaze seems to focus to the stars as he hums out a little tune. it's a familiar tune the kids in liyue all seem to be fond of. and then he remembers. she made the song.
"it used to annoy me whenever she sang that little tune." he mumbles. chongyun stops humming immediately, as if only now realizing what he had been doing the entire time. he looks at the adeptus with an apologetic gaze.
"forgive me. i didn't mean to-"
"it's alright," the adeptus cuts off. "you may continue."
the exorcist continues to stare at him for a while.
"you miss her," he finally says. xiao cannot deny it even if he wanted to.
"i do too," the exorcist continues. those light blue orbs of his go back to stargazing. xiao turns his attention to the one beside him. "hu tao would do the worst pranks ever. it's even worse when she's with xingqiu. together, the two are a force to be reckoned with.
"i hated being the butt of their pranks. and whenever she tells me i do not have to help with matters involving death," chongyun pauses, frown etching on his face. xiao continues to watch him. "i cannot help the irritation whenever she says so with the most irritating smile on her face.
"and yet she's always there for me when matters turn serious." the light blue eyes turn a shade more downcast. "but i wasn't able to do anything for her when she needed help the most. so here i am instead, trying to fulfill a promise."
xiao cannot understand human emotions very well. he doesn't think he ever will. but the pure emotion on the young exorcist's face, he understands. it is the same expression he wears whenever he thinks of the director.
"you love her." he states.
chongyun looks back at him with a small smile on his face.
"but she chose you."
and as xiao continues to stare at the exorcist, he finds new respect for the man who would go out of his way to fulfill a promise to his beloved, no matter how much it may hurt him.