My name is Saiki Kuriko. I am the world's strongest psychic.
You might ask, "Kuriko? I thought it's Kusuo?". Normally, that would be correct.
However, this is fanfiction and the author seems to have decided that a genderswap was necessary.
Not that it matters to me, everyone looks... refer to the either the anime or manga of 'The Disastrous Life of Saiki Kusuo' for more information.
This time around I am not the main character, so this POV is hopefully the first and last it happens.
This world is exceedingly similar to another a vast majority of you are most likely familiar with.
There are a couple major differences other than my gender, but they'll be explained as the story progresses.
[Author here, I may have given Saiki-sama coffee jelly to give some exposition and background. This isn't part of the story, just wanted to make sure people weren't confused. The story will actually start down below. Hopefully someone has fun reading this, I had a quite a bit writing it.
I wish I owned "The Disastrous Life of Saiki Kusuo", I would of given up a vast majority of my personal profit to continue the anime properly.]
You know, when I died by truck-kun I was expecting to just die. When I met a self-proclaimed 'God' afterwards, I was expecting to get isekai'd with some cheats and have a fantasy adventure.
Instead of that happening, 'God' took one look at me laughed and said "Nope". Then I woke up as a baby in a crib. Rude.
I will not regale you the misadventures of my baby days, so let's skip over that and talk about the world I'm in.
The world is basically just modern day Earth and I live in Japan, I couldn't really find many differences. At least at first it was normal modern day Earth.
I remember the first 'change'. I was at my local pre-school out on the playground refreshing my mathematical knowledge with chalk.
Everyone's hair changed. People originally had normal colored hair, the vast majority being black since it's Japan with a few dark browns scattered here and there.
I blinked and all of a sudden people were walking around with some of the most outrageous patterns, colors, and styles you could imagine.
My hair stayed the same and no one seemed to have noticed the changes they went through. I actually asked one of the pre-school sensei's about it, who was now sporting a two-toned hair color of blue and purple, about it and she looked at me like I was crazy.
When I got home that day I checked my family photo albums and even those were changed. I was a bit worried that maybe I was actually crazy.
This was just the tip of the ice berg and everything else reassured me that it was the world that was crazy, not me.
Soon people were doing crazy things and having other anime-esque traits while I stayed exactly the same.
A paper cut takes a couple days for me to heal from and others were healing from critical wounds that would be fatal normally in seconds. It's like a scene change or panel change in anime and manga.
It was frankly a bit worrying and completely terrifying. Hell, I once saw a pick pocket take an old grandma's purse only for him to get neck-chopped by her in return.
She practically teleported behind him, gave him a tap with the side of her knife-hand and he slammed into the concrete hard enough to leave cracks.
The concrete also seemed to have fixed itself magically when I stopped paying attention. I didn't come out of my room for three days after seeing that.
One day, during my elementary school days, something that made me completely apathetic to everything happened.
An entire city went 'poof'. I could see the mushroom cloud from the school's roof. I could see the shockwave blowing through thousands of buildings and people.
I realized at that point, this world was too scary and I could die at any second without even realizing it, so why care?
Then everything went in reverse for a bit, watching and hearing things in reverse is traumatic and I do not recommend it. I went home while it was still ongoing and collapsed in my bedding that was moving around due the reversal.
The next day was the same day and so was the day after. Not in the way you'd expect since it wasn't actually looping.
The news achor literally said the next day was the 8th when it was already the 8th. There was also nothing said about the explosion which is why I was watching the news trying to glean any information.
The school day was being repeated over and over to a certain extent that I am not smart enough to work out completely.
For some reason the majority of lessons the teachers went through were exactly the same everyday but other things were consistently different. It's like everyone forgets certain things the next day but most of their conversations and that happened were retained. It was eerie.
The weekend was also still somehow the 8th as well. Don't ask, it's incomprehensible to my puny mortal mind. The days of the week were going by but the date stayed the same.
No one seemed to have realized something was wrong, it was like their cognitive abilities were being blocked or restricted by a higher entity.
Was it 'God'? Was it the 'Will of the Planet' or some other abstract concept? Whatever it was, it had nothing to do with me.
Then it stopped repeating and time continued on normally at some point. Not sure how many repeats it was but it was enough for me to realize that I was getting older while everyone else wasn't. I was taller than a majority of my peers by a couple inches.
When I was twelve(at least I think so?) my parents gave me a little brother. At first I was worried that he'd be like me and live in fear of the world we live in. Then he was born and he had blue hair just like Dad. Worries abated.
At least I thought so. The school break before I would go into highschool, my little brother at the age of six was strong enough in his rough housing to break my arm by accident. That was one week ago.
I am simply too fragile. It was heartbreaking to tell him that I wasn't able to play with him like that anymore.
Thanks to that incident I was finally able to realize what world I was in. He kept on screaming that I was Baron Cola and that he, Cyborg Cider-man #2, would defeat me.
Out of all the worlds I could of landed in, it was one where a literal God in human skin walked around. Fantastic.
Guess I'll just do what a lot of Chinese webnovels taught me... Hug the big thigh and hopefully not die.
Wait, now that I am thinking about it... Why didn't I get affected by Saiki's mind-control ability? Not that I am complaining, just a bit confused.
Oh well, maybe I'll figure it out when we become neighbors. Mom said that Dad's workplace was looking into opening a branch in another prefecture. Guess I could push him into accepting a job transfer before he would've originally.
~Final entry from Iridatsu Yuuji's notebook that was summarily destroyed~
My name is Saiki Kuriko. I am the world's strongest psychic.
It seems that the Author wasn't satisfied with just one PoV from me. I'll be expecting more coffee jelly.
Today is the first day I attend PK Academy, apparently that is somehow special enough to warrant one of these.
Sitting in the auditorium with the principal droning on and on while a majority of the people are cursing him in there minds isn't very fun. It is moments like these that reaffirm my opinion on my abilities.
They are useless and in fact detrimental to myself. Not to mention that I woke up this morning with a headache even though my precognition didn't activate.
"He just won't shut up!"
"Shut up shut up shut up"
"His voice is making me sleepy... Zzzz"
"I hope I can make friends here..."
"Even a perfect bishoujo like me has a limit on patience."
"So hungry..."
"I can't take this anymore!"
"Hey, is this seat taken? I almost missed the ceremo- Saiki-san!?"
Nani!?
Convincing my parents that moving before the company branch was fully completed was easy. Yuuta was a bit harder since he didn't want me to be away from him, but I bribed him with excessive amounts of his favorite drink.
They were a bit weirded out by how insistent I was but it wasn't anything compared to when I was younger.
I passed the PK Academy entrance exam with flying colors and today is the entrance ceremony where the Principal will spend an hour or so rambling the same few lines over and over in different ways.
Not really looking forward to that, but I am excited to see the characters from the show. Hopefully, I end up in Saiki's class.
They all seem like they'd be really fun to be around. It's been way too long for me to remember much about them though.
Whoops, it seems I'm a bit late to the ceremony. Gotta stop monologuing so much.
My inner monologues are slow and unaffected by Saiki's powers here, time actually passes by rather fast when lost in thought. When other people do it a literal second would've gone by.
Okay fine, maybe I am complaining a bit about being unaffected by Saiki's mind control. Can you blame me? I wanna be able to do "The Chop" as well. I call hax.
I languidly finish my breakfast of toast, I might've been sulking a bit, and start my rather short walk to school. According to Gaagle Maps it's only about 15 minutes.
I check the time and see that I'm about 20 minutes late to the ceremony already, it'll be around three-forth's of the way done if I keep this pace by the time I get there.
Fun fact, I am considered one of those weak constitution characters since I'm basically made of glass by this world's standards so I get away with a lot of things like being late.
I don't usually exploit it much since it'd be easy to make a habit of doing it. It would be kinda pathetic and sad if I basically just ditched class to sleep in the infirmary all the time.
Being late to a horribly boring ceremony is definitely something I'll take advantage of though.
I'm actually the only one living in the house next to Saiki's currently, my parents decided they'll move in after a few months once they handle everything back there.
I brought a couple boxes of stuff from home and moved in yesterday night, so I haven't been able to introduce myself to the Saiki family just yet.
Not that I didn't try introduce myself to Saiki via thought. I may have also attempted to convey that I'd do my best to not annoy him.
No response or spontaneous teleportation into my room to kill me. Maybe he was asleep by that time? It was pretty close to eleven PM when I got there.
I'm actually thinking about this while walking up to auditorium, so Saiki should be hearing what I'm saying.
Actually, how long was his range again? Maybe he was hearing my monologue that I was having at home earlier.
How embarrassing to think about. Sorry you have to listen to all of my cringe thoughts and the occasional stray inappropriate ones that I have too.
Walking through the doors I peek around the corner and try to locate a pink haired guy with a couple antennae jabbed into his skull.
No go. There's too many people of varying heights and pink hair isn't exactly uncommon anymore. Oh well, let's try to find a seat near the edge of the rows.
After walking past about six rows that were occupied, well there was one other free one but it had a huge burly guy that looked like he could bend steel bars in half who glared at me in the seat next to it, I was able to see an open seat right on the edge next to a pastel pink haired girl a couple more rows up.
She's not looking so good from back here with her face planted in her palms while she rubs her temples. Must be a headache.
"Hey, is this seat taken? I almost missed the ceremo- Saiki-san!?"
When I started talking to her, her head whipped up so fast that I thought it was going to fly off and only then did I realize it was Saiki by her(HER!?) special and unique eyewear.
Her(Help brain!) eyes are opened as wide as possible as if she was startled so bad that it was like she got 'jump scared' and dare I say it, maybe a little frightened?.
Oh fuck, did I just call Saiki cute earlier? No no no, please don't kill me Saiki-sama!
Only one thing left to do. Assume the dogeza position and plead for mercy. Running is not an option here, though I wish it was.
"I'm so sorry for saying you were cute, please do not kill me Saiki-sama. I'll never show up in front of you again, so please spare my life."
...No response. In fact, I'm starting to hear the people around me comment about the 'weirdo doing a dogeza'. Did I cause a scene drawing attention to Saiki? There's no hope, I'm already dead.
"Ugh! Gah!"
"Sensei, Takahashi just collapsed over here!"
Thank you Takasomething that just collapsed, your sacrifice will not be in vain. I'm going to take this moment to nope the hell out of here.
I can vaguely hear a person yelling something about CPR, sorry Takasomething but my own life is in immediate danger.
I'll just go behind the auditorium and wait for Saiki to either kill me or some other horrific thing.
Saiki is really cute as a girl though, pulls off the kuudere look perfectly. Reminds me of Nagato from The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya.
Fuck me, I just did it again. My brain has no filter, please be understanding Saiki! Now that I think about it, I wonder if Saiki's powers could rival that of Haruhi's? Nah. Haruhi's stronger.
Gotta stop running from reality, I'm almost positive I can feel her glaring at me from behind. Might just be my nerves though.
Taking a peek confirms my fears, Saiki is glaring at me but showing surprise every couple seconds before returning to a glare.
"I know you have that one laser eye power, not sure what it really does but please don't try to explode my head with it. It looks as if you are actively attempting it and failing."
She shows another look of surprise before glaring again.
"..."
"..."
"Why aren't you saying anything!? It's getting weird!"
Another look of surprise then a look of realization. She teleports away after making a 'stay' gesture.
I am so fucking lost.
Chapter End
Like it? Hate it? Wanna kill me for heresy?
Review and tell me.
You can also PM me or review with a list of all typo's found or even redundancies with suggestions for replacements. I do not claim to be a master of language, in fact I know my skills are rather low, so it'd be nice to get some polite criticisms on where improvements could be made.
This took a mere 4 or 5 hours to create and I know there is minor and major typos since I typed it on my phone.