Episode 3- French is an Eiffel language
Don: Last time on The Ridonculous Race.
Don: After buying spices and riding camels all over the desert, our teams worked up an appetite. And I lost mine. These people are disgusting.
Don: The winners were the best friends, Carrie and Devin. On my list everyone else was a loser, but we can only eliminate one team, and those were the Larpers. I'm not sad, those wannabe wizards gave me the creeps.
Don: But that's history, and this is... The Ridonculous Race.
-Intro-
Don: Yesterday's rest area, is today's starting line. Teams will start in order of finish, beginning with yesterday's winners, the strangely platonic best friends.
Devin pressed the button on the box and read the clue.
Devin: Oh man. Looks like we're going to Paris.
Carrie: Cool.
Pictures of Paris are shown. Including the plain monkey, a coffee shop and a mime on the street doing the box act.
Don: Paris, France. Home of the smooth monkey, small cafes, and other things that annoy me like you have no idea.
The camera shows Don at the top of the Eiffel Tower.
Don: Once in Paris, teams should arrive here at the eiffel tower and receive their next clue.
The best friends hop on a scooter nearby at a rental stand.
Carrie: Let's go
-confessional-
Carrie: I'm so excited. Paris is the most romantic place in the world.
Devin: No doubt, and after I win the million I'm going back to Paris. With Shelly.
Carrie: Yeah... Shelly.
Devin: I miss you so much baby.
-End of confessional-
McArthur: Is it hard to take your eyes off this Parisian landmark?
Sanders: The Eiffel Tower, come on.
Carrie and Devin walked past a sign marking the distance to the airport.
Devin: We're almost there, can you stop squeezing me partner?
McArthur: (imitating the sound of a siren) Stand aside, this is a police emergency.
Carrie: It's the cadets.
The cadets high-fived, before being overtaken by Jacques and Josee, who, as always, had a smile on their faces as they looked into the camera.
-confessional-
Josee: As skaters, we never know when the camera will focus on us, so we have to smile all the time.
Jacques: All the time. Even when we sleep.
Josee: It's very painful.
McArthur: What about those Icies, do they ever stop smiling? Do they sleep like that? When they cry, do they smile? I'll find out.
Sanders: Sometimes he gets a little obsessed.
-end of confessional-
Various teams such as the opposites, the goths (with Crimson holding a black umbrella over both), mother and daughter and the positivists advanced, the adversity twins ended up going through the sign, causing Mickey to fall to the floor.
Mickey: Wait.
The step-siblings also departed after fighting over who was driving, while Jen and Tom approached one of the bikes, carrying a rolled up rug.
-confessional-
Jen: Had we known our next stop would be the universal capital of fashion, we wouldn't have spent so much on an authentic Moroccan rug.
Jen/Tom: Paris. Ihhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
-end of confessional-
The skaters entered the airport and slid into the terminal to get their tickets. With Jacques carrying Josee.
Josee: Two for Paris. Do you offer special services for athletes?
Worker: Oh yes. Free promotion for all gold medal winners.
Josee (with a twitch in her eye): Economy class is fine.
Other teams arrived, the tennis players stopped when they heard noise and seconds later the Surfers entered with the motorcycle, until they hit a pile of luggage.
-confessional-
Brody: I love motorcycles. I tried to jump a pool using one last summer, but ended up crushing my neighbor's gazebo.
The Surfers laugh.
Geoff: Dude, we shouldn't laugh at ruining your wedding.
Geoff/Brody: Free cake.
-end of confessional-
The step brothers had resumed arguing, with Chet driving, while Lorenzo held onto his stepbrother, covering his eyes in the process.
Chet: Get your hands off my face.
Lorenzo: Get your face out of my hands.
Jen: The rug is holding us back, let it go.
Tom: But...
Jen: Tom. We're going to Paris.
Tom: oh. You're free, fly.
The red-haired man let go of the carpet, which was heading in the direction of a team.
Lucas: Flying carpet at 12 o'clock.
The carpet blocked their view, and the Masked Ones ended up crashing into some bushes on the side of the road. And they were passed by the Vegans, who had modified their scooter to have two pairs of pedals.
-confessional-
Laurie: Yesterday, we walked through the desert with our camel instead of riding it, so it would stay hydrated.
Miles: And today, we pedaled our bike so we wouldn't use fuel. I wish we could give the bike to the camel, right?
-end of confessional-
The Bloggers and the Positivists took their tickets, and met up with the badly wounded Masked Ones.
Ella: Oh my gosh, what happened to them?
Shane: Something really weird, he gave us a rug. And it almost killed us.
Jen and Tom were surprised, and started laughing nervously before retreating.
Lucas: I think they had something to do with it.
Sammy: But seeing their reaction, it was most likely an accident.
Lucas: Yeah, well. You know what they say. Never drop giant carpets while riding a motorcycle.
The positivists shared looks of confusion, then looked at Shane.
Shane: Don't look at me, even I have trouble figuring out what he says sometimes.
Don: 12 teams are anxiously waiting at the airport to board flight number two. Which won't take off for another hour and a half.
At the airport, Emma was nervously watching the screen, while Kitty was taking a picture, the twins were also nervously watching the screen, while Spud was relaxing with music, the Cosplayers had changed outfits again, this time Lara was Carmelita Fox, and Pierce was Sly Cooper. From the video game saga, Sly Cooper.
Don: So we covered it with sad Caritas stickers, because that's funny.
Indeed, the plane was full of said stickers.
Don: Meanwhile the first 11 teams are already on their way to Paris.
Pictures are shown of each team on the plane, Devin was sharing some chips with Carrie, Sthepanie and Ryan were feeding each other some snacks (I mean pecans, unsalted peanuts, etc) the cadets were reading a guidebook, Noah was keeping an eye on Owen who was holding his bear while laughing, the Surfers were having trouble opening their bags of candy, the tennis players slept and snored, the geniuses read, the Skaters also rested wearing headphones and sleeping bandages, the goths as always, remained expressionless, Brick tried to gain sleep while Cameron did some calculations, and finally Dave watched the window while Sky rested next to him. Eventually the plane touched down for the night, and the crews took to the outside at full speed.
Don: Flight number one has finally arrived, and the race for first place begins.
All 11 teams tried to get a cab.
Carrie: Eiffel Tower please.
Owen climbed into one of the cabs and his weight tilted it slightly to the right.
Geoff: Eiffel Tower please.
The camera cut to the structure where the Skaters' cab was the first to arrive.
Josee: Gold medal. Ahhhhhh.
Another cab hit them, and out of it came McArthur.
McArthur: On target.
The brown-haired cadet pressed the button and got the clue. As the skaters recovered from the whiplash.
McArthur: Oh. It's a botch or watch.
The camera pans showing that Don was standing, next to a table full of notebooks and a gentleman holding another.
Don: In this look or act, whoever didn't eat the stew in Morocco must draw a caricature of their partner. when this local artist Frances approves the drawing, they will receive their next clue.
The artist gave a thumbs up. The other teams from the first flight began to arrive and everyone got to work.
Devin just smiled as Carrie started drawing, Jacques began the work as Josee struck a skating pose, Ellody and Noah drew for their teams, while their teammates stood static, Ryan moved his pecs as Stephanie's eyes glowed, Brody pulled muscle as he struck a bodybuilder pose, Sanders struck a pose of holding a gun, Brick performed his military salute, Crimson stood in an area with a little shade as Ennui drew, Dave and Sky were the last to grab items.
Dave: I warn you, I'm not exactly an artist.
Sky: I'm not worried, I trust you.
The boy smiled and started drawing. The camera panned to the airport showing the second flight landing.
Don: Just now, the second flight has landed. While the flight number two teams are on their way to the Eiffel Tower, the flight number one teams are trying to finish their drawings.
Brody was already sweating and resisting his muscle pull.
Geoff: Finish.
The party boy showed his drawing, which was literally a rather simplified version of Brody, albeit with considerable muscles.
Brody: Dude. It looked great.
The artist gave a thumbs up and gave them the hint.
Geoff: Yeah.
The surfers clapped their hands together. As Owen watched them.
Owen: Ah, the way they support each other is beautiful. Let's hug it out.
Noah: No.
Owen: Please how about we just...
Noah: Look straight ahead.
Geoff: A lot a lot a lot to go down, to find the circular cheese, and your next clue find. huh?
A noise caught both their attention, and they saw a rat, scurrying down a manhole.
Geoff: Follow that rat.
The surfers went after the rodent, while the cadets prepared to turn in their drawings. The camera passed into darkness, until Don turned on a flashlight.
Don: Welcome to the Catacombs, where ancient Parisian victims of the plague were buried. Teams must use their sense of smell to navigate this labyrinth of tunnels and find the correct exit.
Don is shown at an exit, next to the river and with a pile of cheese wheels of considerable size.
Don: The next clue is hidden in the middle of these wheels of Roquefort cheese.
The camera pans to a cab with a flat tire, stopped in the middle of a street.
Tom: A flat tire in front of a boutique during a midnight event? Please.
Jen: The universe wants us to go shopping.
Tom: Or, the ultimate test of our will.
Jen: We're already in the back, can't we just go downstairs and shop?
-confessional-
Jen: If we come in last, we're going home.
Tom: And the longer we stay in the race, the longer we promote our blog.
Tom/Jen: Tom and Jen's fashion blog.
-end of confessional-
Tom: Although... It will take a couple of minutes to change the car tire.
The two got out and headed to the gallery while the cab driver changed the tire.
Tom/Jen: Yessssss.
Meanwhile, the best friends had no luck with their drawing.
Devin: What do you mean, no? She's the best of her class.
The local showed him the drawing which was very good... although it was apparent that Carrie went into her fantasy world when she did it, as it showed him shirtless and posing on a bed, with roses. Besides, it wasn't in the Cartoon category.
Devin: Oh I see... it's too realistic.
Carrie could only smile sheepishly at the camera. The best friends went back to redo the drawing, while the opposites showed theirs, but also received the thumbs down.
Sky: What? what's so... wrong with it?
The drawing was amazing and accurate, he had even taken the time to make details like taking into account lights and shadows, and the leg of the eiffel tower behind. Sky looked at Dave whit a smile.
Sky: "I'm no artist" you said.
Dave scratched the back of his head in embarrassment at the compliment.
Sky: I can't believe I'm going to say something like this, but. You could do... "worse."
Dave: It shouldn't be that hard.
The sisters were also in progress, with Kitty drawing Emma, who was focused on a booklet.
Kitty: So... you're dating someone from college?
Emma: Yes. His name is Law Curriculum in International and Comparative Monopoly.
Kitty: You know, I was thinking of getting a pixie cut.
-confessional-
Kitty: Emma's always been the serious one. But ever since her boyfriend Jake broke up with her two years ago she's been super...
Emma: FINE. I've been super fine, and I don't need a boyfriend, I need a law degree and my little sister to focus.
Kitty: And a boyfriend.
Emma growled in frustration.
-end of confessional-
The last of the Flight 2 teams arrived and began grabbing pencils and notebooks. But Mickey was trembling at said pencil.
Jay: Come on Mickey, show that pencil who's boss. There are 2 of us, and he's only one.
-confessional-
Jay: It was a Tuesday morning. Mickey's pencil box broke, they were all over the place, he slipped on one and fell down the stairs, landing on pencils during, all, the, fall. He's been afraid of them ever since.
-end of confessional-
Noah had finished his drawing, which consisted of a giant Owen holding the Eiffel Tower in his hand, ready to consume it. Which caused a gleeful reaction from the artist and Noah, who laughed at the drawing.
Artist: Oh, mer ui.
Owen started giggling nervously as well, the artist gave him the hint and Noah took the big guy away.
Owen: Wait, I want to see the drawing.
Somewhere, a cab stopped in front of a goat in the middle of the road. The noise of the engine made its passengers, the rival tennis players, wake up.
Gerry: Huh? Are we there yet?
Cab Driver: You never told me where you wanted to go, old man.
Pete: We're old, but don't call us old men.
-confessional-
Gerry: We have the same energy as the other teams, from 5 o'clock in the morning to 5 o'clock in the afternoon.
Pete: Yeah, then we get a little, groggy.
Gerry: Groggy, hehe? I haven't seen the moon since 2003.
The tennis players laughed.
Pete: Really? Cause I've got a moon for you. -points to his butt- right here.
They both laughed again.
-end of confessional-
Gerry: To the Eiffel Tower. Andale.
The camera passed inside the catacombs, where Ryan and Sthepanie were walking.
Ryan: If I gave you the plague. I'd throw myself on your sick body until I caught it, so we'd die at the same time. And in the same way.
Stephanie: That's... the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me.
The couple started another one of their make-out sessions, and that's not of interest at the moment, so back to the sketchers.
Emma: It needs at least 4 exaggerations to be a cartoon.
Kitty: Oh, I did a lot more than that.
She drew Sammy who decided to sit on a bench, while Shane drew Lucas, while he did the mythical Randy Orton pose leaning on the foot of the tower.
Ennui: Do you want to look alive in this?
Taylor: Thank goodness I'm the one drawing.
-confessional-
Taylor: I'm a very good artist, certainly the best in my class, and maybe in the whole world.
Kelly: I'm not bad, I went to art school for two years, until I dropped out to have Taylor.
Taylor: Oh gosh mom, not everything has to be about you.
-end of confessional-
Tom and Jen came running in, carrying an absurd amount of shopping bags.
Jen: That flat tire was the best thing that could have happened to us.
Tom: I've never shopped in another language so fast in my life.
Jen: It was worth it, if you're looking for rockin' leather pants in North America. I wish you luck.
Tom: Right.
Carrie, Cameron, Junior and Mickey showed their drawings, and they all got a thumbs up.
Carrie: Hurry up, let's go.
The twins stopped in front of the hole.
Jay: Ugh, I hope I don't get the plague again.
The teams of father and son, and brains and brawn exchanged glances.
Dave was next to show the drawing, and received the thumbs up. This time, the drawing was much simpler, and was more similar to a bobble head doll.
Sky: Great.
They both went to the sewer.
Dave: Tell me we don't have to go this way.
Sky (already inside): You'll be fine.
Dave sighed and prepared to go down.
The last three teams, which were the rockers, the vegans (who came on foot) and the tennis players arrived at the tower.
Pete: Let's go, let's go.
-confessional-
Gerry: It's great to be on TV again. Our sponsors died years ago.
Pete: About 30.
They both laughed.
Gerry: The last time he did a commercial, there was no internet.
Pete: Neither did the hair in your ears.
They both laughed again.
-end of confessional-
In the Catacombs. The cadets came to an area with many tunnels. McArthur began to sniff.
Sanders: What are you doing?
McArthur: I trained my nose to work on borders. People think they can take oranges into any country. Not on my watch… this way I'm going in.
The brown-haired cadet entered a tunnel, within seconds her screams were heard, Sanders went behind...and found McArthur with a skeleton on top of her.
McArthur: Get it off me.
Don: While the French Catacombs are giving some teams a warm welcome. Others are trying to draw their pass to the finish line. Heh, draw, get it?
The Bloggers submitted their drawing and received affirmation. The BFFs were next and also received a thumbs up, followed by the Rockers, who also received the artist's approval, and celebrated with an air guitar. Kitty presented a caricature of a moody Emma, with sharp teeth, horns, and a storm cloud over her head, the artist gave them a thumbs up, giving way to the cosplayers, and a drawing of Lara as Carmelita jumping on the rooftops of Paris with her gun, which also received a thumbs up. Lorenzo submitted his drawing of Chet... as a garbage bag with hair and face, while Ennui submitted one of Crimson in the style of Tim Burton's animations. Both teams also received the thumbs up and the clue.
Taylor was next to present her drawing, which rather than Kelly, was the Bride of Frankenstein. The artist was startled, but gave her the thumbs up.
Kelly: Mind if I take this to my surgeon?
Inside the catacombs, Owen and Noah were running around looking for cheese... literally.
Owen: Here cheese, cheese, cheese.
Noah: if we had any kind of advantage, we've already lost it.
The sarcastic boy stopped dead in his tracks when he saw a skull on the ground.
Noah: Oh no. I've seen that skull before. We're going in circles.
Owen: Humm. and so is my stomach.
The blond guy burps.
Owen: Do you see any toilets around here?
Noah was standing in the middle of the catacombs, as Owen ran between tunnels, and somehow came out into another one that shouldn't be connected. like a Scooby doo chase.
Noah: Owen hasn't. You know, "discharged" since he ate that crazy stew in Morocco so, we already knew this moment was coming, we just didn't know when.
The camera cuts to the surfers running, until they stop in front of a wall.
Brody: Oh man, this is the third dead end we've hit.
Geoff: chill out bro, we just have to find all the dead ends, and the only remaining path will be the right one.
-Confessional-
Geoff: We both see the glass half full. But since we met, I gave my half of the glass to him, and we're a full glass.
Brody: Take that science.
Geoff/Brody: Boom.
-End of confessional-
Dave and Sky were walking between the aisles. The boy kept looking everywhere in fear.
Dave: Any sign of an exit?
Sky: For the third time. No.
Dave (getting more and more nervous): No need to raise your voice. I just don't want to find out if the plague is still contagious. Do you know what the black plague did to people, do you? What if some rat is a descendant of a rat that ate the flesh of an infected that was buried here?
The boy began to hyperventilate and fell to his knees. Sky quickly grabbed him by the shoulders and forced him to look directly at her.
Sky: Hey hey hey hey hey hey, calm down, deep breathes, you're going to be okay.
Dave slowly began to calm down, until his breathing and pulse returned to normal. The two stood looking at each other for a moment, smiling.
-Confessional-
Dave: Wow. Normally I would freak out a lot more. But, I don't know how you did it, but, you calmed me down.
Sky: Training can be stressful, so I always practice my breathing so I can stay calm.
Dave: Yeah. I guess I'm not afraid to go into the Catacombs where they buried people with the plague anymore.
Sky: I'm glad to hear that mate. Anyway, if the plague was still contagious, I doubt they would allow access to the catacombs in the first place.
-End of confessional-
Back to the last sketchers. Gerry presented his drawing of Pete as a baby, complete with pacifier. The artist gave them the hint, and then did the same with the Vegans, as Laurie's drawing was Miles as a flower, with a smiling bee and sun.
-Confessional-
Pete: I have a plan, we follow the Veggie-heads to find the cheese, pass them like a rocket, and win.
Gerry: Veggie-Heads.
the two old men laughed again
-end of confessional-
In the tunnels, Cameron and Brick walked together, the military man nervously looking to the sides, while holding Cameron's hand, who was using a flashlight.
Brick: I'm bigger than the darkness, I'm bigger than the darkness.
Cameron: That's right, stay with me Brick. I'll find a way out soon... if I can figure out where we need to go.
The masked and positivists were walking with their backs to the wall, quite nervous about the amount of skeletons, so they didn't realize their paths were merging and ended up bumping into each other's backs.
Masked/Positivists: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
On instinct, Ella ended up jumping, and Shane grabbed her arms, while Sammy grabbed a skull and threw it, hitting Lucas.
Lucas: Ouch.
Sammy: Oh my gosh. I'm sorry, I got scared and that was the first thing that came to my mind.
Lucas: Don't worry, it's not the first time, besides, I have a very tough skull.
Shane: This place would scare the fear out of you.
The superhero and the princess realize what position they were in and quickly separate.
Shane: You want to... you know... team up until you find the exit?
Her: Oh, that's nice of you.
Shane: It's just my duty.
Lucas sighs.
Sammy: Is something wrong?
Lucas: No.
-confessional-
Lucas: Shane is one of the nicest guys walking the earth, but sometimes that niceness can. You know, get in the middle of the road.
Shane: We're very early on, and it's not like he's going to let them pass before us if we were the last 2 teams.
Lucas: Look at it that way. Just try to control yourself, remember the money is for your house, my house, and many more.
Shane: I don't forget brother, I don't forget.
-end of confessional-
The Adversity twins were also running down one of the many roads, Until they saw two eyes in the dark.
Twins: Ahhhhhhhhhhh.
Which turned out to be the goths.
Mickey: They scared us. It's a little scary down here.
Ennui: Really? I've never been so happy.
-confessional-
Ennui: This place could be an amusement park or a children's camp.
-end of confessional-
The camera switches to where the cadets were, McArthur was using her nose.
McArthur: Roquefort. Matured in the cellar for... 3 years... Do you hear water running?
The cadets went to some stairs and found themselves outside the Catacombs, and with the pile of cheeses.
McArthur: Yeah. That's what I was talking about. You're coming with me.
A cough interrupted them, and they saw that the skaters had followed them.
McArthur: Oh look, it's the silver losers.
In response, Josee kicked one of the piles of cheese into the water, revealing the sign with the clue.
Josee: I hate silver.
Jacques: Take your cheese, and sail to where the Mona Lisa is being displayed.
Sanders: The Louvre.
The cameras showed some images from inside the Louvre.
Don: The Louvre, home of the Smooth Monkey, and other expensive paintings that I've been asked to stop touching.
Then move to the outside, where Don was standing next to the carpet.
Don: It's also the rest area for this was of the race, the last team to reach the carpet at the culmination could be eliminated from the competition. But the race for first place is going at high speed.
Jacques landed on the cheese, and then caught Josee, the current did the rest.
Josee: Goodbye. They stink worse than this cheese boat.
McArthur: Too bad you forgot the oars.
Sanders pulled out said objects to prove his point.
Jacques: Darn it.
Josee: Jaqces. You were supposed to take the oars.
The cadets quickly passed them on.
McArthur: How do you say in French, Boyah?
Back in the Catacombs, the vegans and tennis players were still searching, covering their noses for a strong aroma they assumed was cheese.
Gerry: If that's what French cheese smells like, I'm officially lactose intolerant.
The elders laughed.
Pete: I'm officially intolerant to you.
They both laughed again. While the vegans stopped in front of a wooden door.
Miles: It's coming from here.
The vegans opened the door and a stinky green gas came out, causing the two teams to run out, as that door turned out to be from a bathroom, which was being used by Owen.
Owen: Dude. That Moroccan stew sure does tear you up.
The blond guy flushed the toilet. The camera panned to the outside of a sewer, where a mime was performing the box act, until smoke from Owen's flatulence poured out of the grates like a shotgun blast, knocking the performer out.
-confessional-
Noah: And that's only 6.2 on Owen's stinky scale.
Owen: There's a scale?
Noah: Sure. Sushi fumes are 1, onion soup fumes are 5, spicy burrito fumes go up to 12. Those things can take the paint off a door.
Owen: It's true.
-end of confessional-
The Bloggers walked around with all their bags. Next to the BFF's
Katie: Gosh, this place really is scary.
Tom: too scary.
Jen: Hey Tom.
The three of them turned and saw Jen holding a skeleton in front of her, while waving an arm at it.
Jen: How do you like the results of my diet?
The 4 of them laughed, until they heard some grunting.
Sadie: G-G-Guys?
A monstrous shadow could be seen in a tunnel. The 4 of them ran out. With Katie jumping into Sadie's arms. Until Tom went back for a bag he dropped and then ran again. The figure stopped roaring and came out into the light, revealing it was just a small rat, who laughed at the result of his prank.
Outside, Devin caught Carrie so they could both be on the cheese raft.
Devin: Miss.
Carrie: oh. Hehe.
More teams took their cheeses to the water and started paddling, including the cosplayers, mother and daughter, goths, brains and brawn, adversity twins and the daters. The cadets kept paddling, at one point they looked back.
McArthur: What the hell?
Turns out the Ice Dancers weren't finished, as they swam along holding on to their cheese.
-confessional-
Jacques: Forget the paddles? Ha. That's not going to stop us.
Josee: We've been in much worse situations. He once got bit by a rabid squirrel, but that didn't stop us.
Jacques: I skated disguised as a dog, and all that foam coming out of my mouth looked normal.
Josee: Adapt. That's what a winner does.
-End of confessional-
The skaters moved on to the cadets.
McArthur: They're getting weirder by the minute.
The camera showed that the sisters, Surfers, and father and son had joined the competition in the water. While the rival tennis players and vegans were among the few teams still looking for a way out of the Catacombs.
Don: Most of the teams had made it all the way to the water. But for those still in the Catacombs, the challenge to not come in last has begun.
-confessional-
Pete: We made a terrible mistake.
Gerry: I thought the vegans would sniff out the cheese in seconds.
Pete: If we lose now we'll be lucky to get a sock contract. And I hate socks, you never know where to put your heel.
Gerry: Well, there goes the sock contract.
The tennis players once again shared laughter at their jokes that only they understood.
-end of confessional-
Owen and Noah finally emerged from the Catacombs.
Noah: There's the clue. We're still in the race, let's see, I'll take the oars, you take the wheel and. NO.
Owen was already eating one of the wheels.
Owen: What? Eating cheese is good.
The Ice Dancers were getting closer and closer to their destination.
Josee: The Louvre, that way.
The team reached the dock area and began waving to the camera, allowing the cadets to regain their lead.
McArthur: Push Sanders, feel the pain.
The skaters followed, the two teams up the stairs, and pushed the cheese, all the way to the carpet.
Don: Hurdle fence cadets, you came in first place. And the Ice Dancers will have to settle for second.
McArthur decided to dance to make fun of them.
McArthur: Don't you hear victory music? It must be because they didn't win.
Josee got her eye twitch.
Meanwhile, the other teams were still sailing, although the pros were on an ever-smaller raft thanks to Owen.
Noah: Stop it. You're eating our raft.
Owen: I'll stop.
I take another piece.
Owen: The last one.
And another one.
Owen: Okay, the last one for real.
Ryan: Time to put this baby on full power.
The athlete threw his paddle in the air, but failed to catch it and ended up losing it.
Ryan: Whoops. Baby, hand me your paddle, I'll make it faster.
Unfortunately he had closed his eyes as he said it, so he failed to catch the paddle. Stephanie gave him a reprimanding look.
-confessional-
Ryan: I'm sorry I failed you babe.
Sthepanie: It's okay sugar. Just...don't let it happen again.
-end of confessional-
Noah paddled as best he could, while using Owen as a raft, as the big guy had consumed the entire wheel of cheese.
Owen: Paddle, paddle, paddle.
Tom was balancing on the raft catching more bags. While the B.F.F.S, Masked, Positivists and Opposites were already racing down the river.
Jen: Tom. Don't let that get wet.
Tom: Don't worry, I'll keep things balanced. But I think you'll have to swim.
Jen put on a look of determination.
Jen: I will. For the clothes.
The dressmaker sighed in surprise.
-confessional-
Tom: This is a big sacrifice. She just lets her stylist wet her hair.
-end of confessional-
Jen took a dive, and when she came out, she had a frog on her head, which was now wearing her glasses. This scared her, but she started pushing the cheese. Meanwhile, the Surfers made it to the finish line with the cheese.
Don: Third Place.
-confessional-
Both: Oh yeah.
-end of confessional-
Don: Quarters (Best Friends)
Don: Fifths (Father and son)
Don: Sixth (Step-brothers)
The vegans finally made it to the water, until the tennis rivals landed in front of them and walked away tauntingly.
-confessional-
Pete: The thing is. That age is only in your mind.
Gerry: And in your joints.
Pete: And it has a little bit to do with the year you were born.
They both laughed.
-end of confessional-
Don: And here come more teams.
Don: Seventh (Bloggers -with the frog-).
Don: Eighth (Cosplayers)
Don: Ninth (Daters)
Don: Geniuses in tenth, followed by Sisters and Brains and Brawn in eleventh and twelfth respectively.
Don stopped the pros.
Don: Oh look, it's Noah and his ark. 20 minute penalty.
Owen: What? But why?
Don: Because the challenge was to sail the cheese on the river.
Owen: But it's inside me. I am cheese.
Don: That you are cookie, now step aside and pray you don't come in last.
The camera focuses on the river, with the rockers (Rock was paddling and Spud was lying on the cheese) passing the tennis rivals and the Vegans.
-confessional-
Laurie: Being last made us realize we had to step up our game.
Miles: Yeah. We were super charged up.
-end of confessional-
The girls moved on to the seniors.
Gerry: How is that possible? We're athletes, they eat bird seed and dust.
-confessional-
Just the girls were eating bird seed.
Laurie: Pass me the seeds.
Miles: Do you want them with powder?
-end of confessional-
Don: Post 13 (Mother and daughter)
Don: 14 (Adversity Twins)
Don: 15 (Goths)
Don: 16 (Masked Mens)
Don: 17 (Opposites)
Don: 18 (Positivists)
Don: 19 (B.F.F.S.)
Owen was sweating like a shower, as Noah paced from side to side, there was still just over 5 minutes left on the clock.
Don: Looks like someone's sweating like a pig.
Noah ended up slipping from the sweat.
The Vegans and Rockers made it to the finish line.
Don: 20th place and the Rockers are in 21st place.
Owen: Oh no, here come the tennis rivals.
-confessional-
Owen: I'll feel really bad if we get eliminated because of my love for cheese. And the worst part is. I could eat a whole other one right now. I have no self-control. I'm like a dog.
Noah smacked him on the hand with a rolled up newspaper.
Noah: bad, bad partner.
Owen let out a dog-like whine, which did take Noah by surprise.
Noah: not so literal.
-End of confessional-
The tennis players were having trouble carrying the cheese up the stairs.
Gerry: Almost there.
Pete ended up falling to the floor, and the cheese crushed Gerry. As the clock kept counting down, now close to two minutes. The tennis players made it up the stairs, and were now carrying the cheese, one step at a time, the problem was that their pace was so slow, that a snail was faster than them... literally, because the snail was passing them at that instant.
-confessional-
Pete: Well, that's embarrassing.
Gerry: I need a nap.
Pete: He sleeps 8 hours a day.
Gerry: And at least 10 at night.
They both laughed again.
-end of confessional-
Dave was watching the situation just as nervously as the pros, the tennis players were close by, when out of nowhere an alarm went off.
Don: Reality show experts, your penalty is over.
All 4 jumped to the mat.
Gerry: It's a tie, nobody leaves.
Don: Not so fast, I'm afraid you guys are eliminated.
Pete: What? Why?
Don: Because one of Gerry's feet was knocked off the mat.
The camera came down and confirmed it.
Gerry: Do you need glasses, dummy? That foot was inside.
Don: I don't need glasses, and your foot was outside.
Gerry: Inside.
Don: Outside.
Gerry: Inside.
Don: Game and Set, out. Get out of here.
A recap of the tennis players' short stay is shown.
Pete: Well, that was a disaster.
Gerry: At least we weren't the first ones eliminated.
Pete: Yeah, now we can fish for some sponsors.
Gerry: If you know of anyone who needs a promoter for arthritis creams or bathtubs with doors, call my agent.
The camera shows the tennis players floating on the cheese wheel in the river.
Pete: Who's your agent?
Gerry: It's been so long I don't remember.
They both laugh again for the last time on camera.
-BONUS SCENE-
The pros and Dave walked into the hotel which was near the Louvre. Owen immediately went to the buffet, which included... yep, more Cheese.
Dave: Good thing they made it, that was too close.
Noah: You think so?
Dave: Okay, I'll admit I earned that one.
Noah: It's wise to admit it. But you're right, Owen needs to control his appetite more.
The two watch as the season one finalist devours a block of cheese like it's nothing.
Noah: Hey can I ask. What's your relationship with that Sky girl?
Dave: Well. She goes to the same school as me.
Noah: And already?
Dave: Yeah, we're just buddies. Is it that weird?
Noah: A bit. From what little I knew about you from the conversations between our loud parents. It's not like you had a lot of friends. Much less girl friends.
Dave sighs.
Dave: Yeah well, she's not really my friend, she needed a partner, and it was a chance to get away from, you know, the guys on the football team with 2 brain cells.
Noah: Whatever you say, just keep an eye out, if I know anything about you, and I do. You're someone who latches on to people very easily.
Noah withdrew, Dave didn't understand what he was trying to say, but gave it little thought and went to his room, upon entering he saw Sky asleep.
Dave: I guess that race leaves no one indifferent.
The Hindu covered himself with his blankets and went to sleep, because tomorrow would be another day of racing.
-END OF BONUS SCENE-
Elimination Table
24- The Larpers, Leonard and Tammy.
23- The Tennis Rivals, Gerry and Pete.
Still competing.
Best Friends, Carrie and Devin.
The Cadets, Sanders and McArthur.
The Ice Dancers, Jacques and Josee.
The Opposites, Dave and Sky.
The Goths, Crimson and Ennui.
The B.F.F.S., Katie and Sadie.
Brains and brawn, Cameron and Brick.
The Daters, Ryan and Sthepanie.
The Surfer Dudes, Geoff and Brody.
The Geniuses, Ellody and Mary.
The Reality TV Pros, Owen and Noah.
The Cosplayers, Lara and Pierce.
The Masked Mens, Lucas and Shane.
The Positivists, Ella and Sammy.
The Rockers, Rock and Spud.
The Bloggers, Tom and Jen.
The Sisters, Emma and Kitty.
The Adversity Twins, Mickey and Jay.
Mother and Daughter, Kelly and Taylor.
The Step Brothers, Chet and Lorenzo.
The Vegans, Laurie and Miles.
Father and son, Dwayne and Junior.
And so ends our tour of the city of love.
The rival tennis players didn't have much to do here, so their elimination remained the same. I personally enjoy them, but they didn't have much to offer.
Sky and Dave continue to build their teamwork, this time, we have Dave showing that he has a talent with drawing (all characters must have some talent, even if they don't bring it out) and adapt the calm down moment from episode 2 of Pahkitew Island here, I think it fits well, and goes along with how nervous Dave gets about everything related to germs and dirt.
We get the first instance of the rivalry of the cadets and the skaters, we follow the interactions between masked and positivists, Owen and Noah entertain as only they know how, and The B.F.F.S had a moment of friendship with the bloggers.
In the next episode, we take a train ride to a Mediterranean coast to meet mammals and relive their childhoods… as long as they went to the beach.