23
By Grace (purplemud)
Pairing: Naley and a bit of Leyton and Brucas
Summary: Nathan Scott is done playing basketball. In fact, if he's going to be honest about it, he's done with living. But one funeral just might change that. AU. Totally.
Warning: Character death. Strong language. Some sexual content in the future. Maybe.
Author's note: Much thanks for the awesome feedback. I really appreciate it.
Disclaimers: Standard disclaimers apply. Me don't own. Lines from the show shamelessly borrowed. Please don't sue.
Five - Interlude
You cut off ties, never look back and move on. Life is like that. Can't get stuck, not to a place, a time, a moment, a dream, a feeling, a person. Life continues on, even until after you've breathed your last breath, everything else moves forward. It's has to. And yet no matter how far you've gotten yourself, far away from that past, from that person you've left behind or the one that left you behind, there's always that small part of you that wonders every now and then: How does the other world, the other half live?
Lucas hadn't exactly been thrilled with the move. He already had friends in Tree Hill. He already knew where the best ice cream shop was, the best bookstore, the best places to hide at the playground, the neat little shortcut that led towards the Rivercourt; that small dirt road that he had walked on every day, alone with his thoughts, hoping that he didn't have to run into his arrogant, angry little half-brother.
And this inevitably led him to the most important thing of all: he had already gotten used to the fact that he had an arrogant, angry little half-brother.
To be honest, he had gone beyond getting used to it. He had already accepted it and had been quite okay with the whole thing. Well, as okay as one would expect from a thirteen year old boy who had grown up in a home where no lies were ever told and everything is out in the open, discussed any time he wanted it to be talked about. His mom had always been willing to answer any and all of his questions – this kind of honesty, made him not at all like the ordinary thirteen year old boys.
The night his mom told him of her plans, she had patiently answered when he asked the many whys of this decision. And while Lucas heard and accepted her answers, what he never told his mom was that he didn't understand why it always had to be them.
Why were they always sacrificing their happiness? Even at his young age, Lucas felt that it wasn't right, that it wasn't fair at all. But he kept it all to himself. It was the first, the last and the only thing that Lucas never told his mom. And besides, he knew that even if had voiced out his feelings, he was certain that there was no talking his mother out of leaving their home. This was the woman who had decided to have a son, with or without Dan, with or without the support of her parents. When Karen Roe decides on something, there was nothing in the world that can stop her. And once she had gotten the idea of moving away, starting all over again, a clean slate for both of them, it was all that she could think about until she has finally actually done it.
She was so determined to leave Tree Hill behind - the only home Lucas had ever known – it took her less than half a week to get a house in Oak Lake. Okay, certainly not the farthest place from Tree Hill, but it was, at least to Karen, a start.
Down the line, someday, they might move out of the state entirely. Somewhere far like Seattle or maybe even out of the country, New Zealand sounded nice to her, but for now Oak Lake would have to do.
There is only one Tree Hill, his mom told him once and now he was going to have to say goodbye to it. Lucas didn't want to. This was his one true home. He had wanted to tell his mom but when she spoke of leaving; she had never been so fierce, never sounded so sure, so hopeful, and so adamant that Lucas immediately understood that was what was going to happen. It was final. They were going. That was it. No ifs and buts. Goodbye, Tree Hill.
Packing their belongings had taken them less than a week. Karen made sure to leave everything that could be left behind. Everything that connected Karen to Tree Hill, she got rid of them. She no longer felt connected to that girl: the young Karen had long faded away from her memories. From here on, she could be anyone she wanted to be. And she wanted to be free from everything that tied her down to Tree Hill.
Lucas never uttered a word of complaint. He helped her every time she asked him to go carry out stuff and throw them away, even the old blue, black and white Ravens memorabilia that he secretly treasured. He didn't say 'I don't want to' or 'I have to have this!' when she told him that he can't take much of his belongings to their new home. Lucas just looked at her, listened to what she had to say, nodded his head and did as what was told.
That was her boy. Her blue eyed baby boy. Dan Scott might have gotten the better end of... well, whatever their misguided, obviously ill-fated high school romance had been; he might have gotten the better deal in life: the bigger house, better future, a blonde bombshell for a wife and another son. He might have everything that he had ever dreamt of and more but Karen got Lucas and everything else just didn't matter anymore.
As long as she had Lucas with her, everything was perfect. The rest, well they could learn to work on. They can and will cope with it. They were both good at that and as long as they had each other, it was all that mattered
Oak Lake is slightly bigger than Tree Hill. It was friendlier, that was for sure. Especially to a hard working single mother who can cook up a storm: the sweetest desserts that would make your toes curl, that could make your head spin at the swirl of flavors – there was time when it was whispered among the halls of Oak Lake that if you wanted to win someone's heart, you have to buy them the strawberry cheesecake from Karen's Café.
It helped too that Karen had a kind, courteous, quick witted blue eyed boy whom everyone loved. They got along fine with their new neighbors and by the second week, Lucas could see just how much his mother had changed. She didn't look wary or sad anymore; instead, she always had a bright encouraging smile whenever he would mention how different Oak Lake was from Tree Hill.
Of course, what he'd always meant was that he missed Tree Hill already and that he absolutely hated it here. Here he was the new kid, where no one paid him any attention at all; at least no kid his age ever spared him a second glance. Here, it was as though he barely existed. He could get lost at night; find himself at the middle of any empty unfamiliar street, completely alone, completely scared. Tree Hill was better, even if it meant that he'd have to keep on ignoring Nathan and his stupid little taunts and his stupid friends who always joined in on the name calling.
But here also, his mother glowed and she laughed more often. By their third week, she had befriended almost all of their neighbors and had even invited guests over to their home for dinner. They never had anyone at their old house at Tree Hill. Except for his uncle Keith who'd regularly visit them but he was family so that really didn't count.
It took Lucas a while but he finally understood that here in Oak Lake, his mother didn't have to constantly worry about words being whispered behind their backs. At least not the hurtful kind of words, like maybe pity or abandoned or bastard.
The last word he'd learned from some of the older kids back in Tree Hill who used to hang out at the Rivercourt. They were okay. They let him play with them, had even taught him a few moves here and there – had even attested to the fact that he was a born player, had natural skills and instincts for basketball. One summer afternoon they told him what 'bastard' meant and he had always been slightly thankful that Nathan never had the chance to say that to him. Of course, Nathan didn't stop his friends from muttering the word as he passed by them; still, it would have been a whole lotta different thing if his own brother threw that word at him.
And that was probably the only reason why the move wasn't so bad. At least at the start it had been Lucas's only reason. It took him a while, but in time, he had learned to like Oak Lake and maybe even love it better than he loved Tree Hill.
In Oak Lake, he had gotten what he would have never even had in Tree Hill. A chance.
A chance to become who he's meant to be and not who or what the past of Tree Hill might dictate. Here, in Oak Lake, he found himself.
It wasn't easy; he was a new kid after all. It took him a while to put down roots and slowly grow into a man that his mother fervently wished he would become. Not just because the expectation had been set almost too high but because he had moments of doubts, moments when he had been unsure, lonely and friendless, walking to class alone, having lunch alone - almost always so awkwardly alone in everything.
Not so totally alone though, he had his books and they were his constant companions. If you went by Karen's Café – his mother had gotten the courage to invest some money and started a small café – if he wasn't doing the dishes and didn't have tables to clean or wait on, Lucas would be at sitting on a corner, nose buried in a book.
He read so much Karen bought an old book shelf and placed it right next to his own corner at the café. He filled them up with books that by the time he graduated from Oak Lake High, it was practically bursting with books of all kinds.
Lucas didn't make any friends in his first year in Oak Lake. It wasn't really until he started playing basketball with the kids his age and then with the junior and then the senior varsity team that he found his place. With no one urging him or pushing him, deciding all on his own, Lucas tried out for the team, got accepted and found his calling. His path.
At first, yes, it bothered him, scared him that this feels too much like the same path his father had lead, would've wanted him to lead had he been the chosen son, but he managed to shake those doubts off. This was his present and it was all his. Exactly the way Karen had wanted it to be the day she decided that it was time to put the past behind them.
Lucas had always known that his mother had wanted him to live a life that didn't have to be dragged down and constantly colored by her history in Tree Hill. It was something that she wanted to give him, something that he needed. His mom was a wise woman. Brave. Probably the bravest person in the whole world and Lucas loved her dearly. His mom was his everything.
Well, half of his everything. The other half belonged to his best friend whom he loved in ways that could not be possibly measured.
And well, okay, basketball too.
By the time he graduated in Oak Lake High, Lucas had everything that his mother had dreamt for him. Everyone knew his name and it wasn't because he was Dan Scott's son or because he was Nathan Scott's older half-brother. It was simply because he was Lucas Scott and he was, as he had been when they first moved here, kind and smart and honest and always so polite. And it certainly helped that he was talented in basketball. And despite being part of the basketball team that had almost lead Oak Lake to the State Championship, he had still managed to graduate with honors.
He was popular with everyone. A local celebrity of sort. But more importantly, everyone and anyone in Oak Lake loved him. They treated them as though he was their own son, their older brother, a mentor, a friend. Karen could not have been any happier and though she couldn't be certain how Lucas' life would have turned out had they stayed in Tree Hill, seeing her son look so happy was enough for her to never ever regret packing up and leaving Tree Hill behind.
But no matter how perfect Lucas's life had been in Oak Lake, no matter how much he felt like he belonged here, a small part of him, the small ghost of a boy still wondered, still thought about it: What if they had stayed in Tree Hill?
- tbc -
Note: It's ugh, short, sorry. It's supposed to come with chapter 6 which I stupidly deleted and which I didn't have a back up copy of and I'm just stupid I know. I am currently pulling the hair out from my head at my staggering stupidity but once I've calmed down, I will attempt a re-write for chapter 6 and post is ASAP. Thanks.