Mirrored Crescendo

Author comments at the end

Hachiman pov:

"mm.."

My neck hurts

I open my eyes after blinking a couple of times

My head hurts

Where the fuck am I?

Why did I sleep wearing this? Why did I fall asleep in this sof-

Yukinoshita?!

The beautiful girl whom yesterday I gave myself to, and proclaimed something outrageous with a hug is sleeping on the other side of the couch. Rocking a ponytail with a few strand rebellious hairs making company to her small ahoge she's also wearing the same cardigan I saw her in the last time I was here. A messy haired sleeping Yukinoshita forms an incredibly adorable sight.

I actually feel strange in my predicament. A lot of girls flashing shy smiles or being all cutesy might make my heart skip a beat, but that's essentially it. I close the matter with a mental comment on why I would not confess to them in this day and age of this Hikigaya Hachiman.

Yet the sight of a peacefully and disorderly Yukinoshita sleeping next to me wells something more than excitement or a simple doki doki situation.

I feel like… I have to.. I need to grab her hand in mine.

My left hand flies in search of her uncovered by her blanket right hand, and just as I'm about to form a physical link between us I notice how miserable it feels because of sleeping in these clothes.

My back and my legs feel sticky from dry sweat, where did this turtleneck even come from?

Well, handholding will have to wait. I know I let this girl know I have feelings for her, but come on. It 's this girl. Holding her hand will wake her up and she will fake dial the emergency services.

"Oi, Yukinoshita. Okiro-"

My eyes widen immediately after gently shaking her shoulder and I'm overwhelmed.

"I can't understand you just by forgetting Hikigaya-kun… please."

"Well that's fair, knowing and understanding aren't the same thing."

"I don't want to lose you Yukinoshita, you asking me to resign from the club made me picture a timer of milliseconds running out in my head, if I didn't step up then, I never would have, and that wasn't an option, it isn't."

"However, however Hikigaya-kun, I don't regret for one second placing expectations on you, real expectations, in your words, genuine expectations. and once again, against all odds and misconceptions, you came back and underhandedly did amazing things, who else if not you Hikigaya-kun."

"Hikigaya-kun. I like you."

"Yukino..sob…I like you too, so, so damn much."

"That is correct Yuki-hugger-san, the Yukino points have just been created. You are now in third and last place in the standings."

"Perhaps in the past. You did ruin my experience during that chance encounter in the Tokyo cats and dogs show. But you also helped me find my way. For that, I would never again send you to hell Hachiman. Without you I'll get lost."

"...I really like you Yukino."

"That was particularly high in Hachiman points."

…I am completely and utterly left out of combat by these memories and the sensation they bring with them.

As my eyes start to feel watery and misty and my chest starts resembling a Mitsubishi Zero engine I realize that however inconceivable these memories were, however unrealistic they look compared to what would seem normal to me a week ago, these memories are a part of what now makes me. A part of… us.

Ahh for fuck's sake! No matter how titanic the feat of declaring my affections to her was, it's still embarrassing as hell.

But, I came up with the Yukino points and you can put every single Hachiman point on the bank that I'm proud of my invention. I'll patent it.

But one part is missing, I need Yukino awake. Not only do I want the pleasure of observing her wake up. We have school in… one hour and twelve minutes.

I softly shove her shoulder again

"Hey, Yukino"

"mm" She fidgets a little bit in her sleep.

Now that I take another look at her face there are some strange things in place. For starters her breath hitched as in little gasp and her face is getting an endearing red glow.

Almost…Almost as if she wasn't sleeping at all.

"Uhh… Yukin-"

She spontaneously opens her eyes allowing me to see her blue irises. She turns her head to me and the previously mentioned eyes widen. Her lips barely agape.

"Ha..chiman?" She asks in disbelief

I feel my face getting hotter by each passing millisecond.

"Ohayo?"

She scoots a little bit closer to me and timidly pinches the fabric of the accursed black turtleneck. I now know it was a gift from my aunt.

"I… remember putting this on… yesterday."

"... I remember changing and putting on the cardigan you're wearing. Looks good"

For the sake of not being labeled a pervert I omitted that I missed the opening of one episode because I stared too much in the mirror when taking off her pan-san Tshirt.

She then directs her gaze to me and our eyes meet, showing me the doubtful yet at the same time full of hope feeling that engulfs this esteemed clubmate of mine.

"Is it..did it actually happen then? Was it not a product of a fantasy subverted from reality?... Do you… remember?"

"Dunno, we might've developed dementia together and fabricated it all. Ironic huh? Two loners started a hivemind." I smirk at her and she gives me an annoyed look, shattering the fragile image she was putting a moment ago.

"Hachiman! Don't tease me."

How cute, I bring her close, remembering how the simple action of a hug has now helped us reach clarity twice. I wrap one arm around her back and flick her ponytail with my fingers, then wrap the other arm around her waist.

She goes beet red

"Of course I remember woman. As narcissistically homosexual and confusing as yesterday was, it was the best day of my life.

Besides, if it hadn't happened, just by the occurrence of you calling me Hachiman my heart would have bursted out of my chest."

She leans her head against my chest and hugs me back

"It's just that, I was dreaming some minutes ago and suddenly all the memories of yesterday came flooding in. I was certain I had just been waken up but I was seeing everything again and my eyes were closed. For a minute I found myself on edge with the uncertainty of not knowing if it had been real or not."

Interesting. I woke up with no recollection of yesterday and was only assaulted with the flashback when I touched her, it seems she was squirming and nervous when she too got all the flashing images and sensations in her head.

She had it worse than me, after waking up I was just captivated and stupefied by her presence. If I had to figure out whether yesterday happened or not my heart would not have burst but it would have been ripped out like in an Aztec rite.

"uhn"

I'm broken away from my musings by a little sound of distress. I look at her and find her still incredibly red with a facial expression that just lets me know she's uncomfortable.

"Yukino? Are you okay?"

"I… my apologies Hachiman. Upon reminiscing the events of yesterday I noticed how uncharacteristically bold and daring I was… I'm sure it felt odd for you to see me act so atypically.

Please forgive me, I must have hid behind your face in such a strange situation that I found courage I would have never displayed before, I'm sorry!"

She says with shame leaving me flabbergasted while I process what I just heard. Then I just started… laughing.

I laughed for some seconds after the thoughts started rolling in, like achieving Buddhist enlightenment and making sense of life. I could only unleash my creepy laughter and confuse her further. I'm sorry Yukino! Please don't take points away!

"Didn't we already live outside of what we are expected of,you and I?" I hug her a little tighter

I mean, we initially met because we were deviants of this society of simpleminded teenagers, already disappointing my parents, our peers, whatever arbitrary rules that binded everyone.

We were exceptional variations and/or failures to the status quo and normie environment. For some reason or another we decided this way of acting, thinking, interacting was a better way to do it than how anyone else would expect us to do so.

"You know, it's funny. Yesterday at the table, I was at a crossroads. I knew that staying 'in character' was imperative, I mean, for Pan-san's sake Yukino, we switched bodies. The situation demanded we acted differently. But even so I had the urge to give it a twist.

And in hindsight, in the clubroom where I hugged you for the first time. Didn't we act inconsonant as fuck as when we met?"

I see her giving me the most precious smile I have ever seen in someone that isn't Komachi.

"I think it's very important that you placed expectations on me like you said. I treasure them and I feel bad for betraying them a week ago. But I also said I never expected you to give a damn about me and suddenly I'm hit with a confession by the most beautiful and most intelligent girl in school.

Fuck expectations, assumptions and established roadblocks Yukino, let's be free."

She lets out a heavenly giggle to complete my accession to Nirvana.

"My, this is indeed very unexpected of you Hachiman, shall we request membership to the popular clique from your homeroom?"

She smirks back and I deadpan, we are not countries trying to get into the EU woman! Even if I just trashed established images, I'm still somewhat of a loner and I would very much appreciate it if I got the Turkey treatment of staying over 35 years awaiting response.

"Err.. let's not." She started laughing and I joined her in that for a while, snuggling against my chest again. Honestly, this girl is a bundle of nice things that I really want to discover and treasure more.

"By the way, Totsuka-san asked us to play tennis with him again in exchange for getting Hiratsuka-sensei off your… my…. Well,off our case."

"He did? To you too? As in, he mentioned 'Yukinoshita-san?"

"Yes, why wouldn't he?"

"Well he did see you getting tired and nearly collapsing when we dueled the normie monarchs."

She pinches me in my abdomen

"Ow"

"Yes, he did ask of me and you too. We have a debt to repay."

"Hmmm, I'll ask him later if he wants to play today or next week."

Suddenly she backs a little to see my face again.

"Hachiman."

"Yes?"

"The times you mentioned your liking of me, to make matters clear. You do mean it in a romantic way, don't you?"

"I do, I like you a lot Yukino." I feel my cheeks hot again, but I said it with complete seriousness, for it is the truth. No extra comment or remark or cowardly added content to relieve my embarrassment.

"I see, that proclamation makes my heartbeat faster and as you can probably notice, my face is red-" I nod

"But I have heard it thrice already and it is starting to lose its novelty."

The sudden gut punch I felt must have shown as concern in my face because she brings a hand to my cheek in reassurance.

"It is because of that reason and the confidence your words about, I quote 'Fuck expectations, assumptions and established roadblocks' that I suggest this Hachiman."

The worry I had evaporates and the voice of Yukino cursing brings a little smile to my lips, I have only heard it a couple of times and I know it'll probably never get old.

"You like me."

"Correct."

"And I like you."

"You do?"

She pinches my torso again

"I do like you Hachiman, I like you a lot."

"Right." Would you look at that? 1200 bpm. My face is a very ripe tomato, I just know it.

"By those metrics…it would make sense, and I think we would both want this. So, I think we should become… a couple."

Oh. My. Gods.

If there was a Nirvana 2, a premium Omeyocán, or an even higher Takamagahara. My eyes see something that surpasses all that.

Yukinoshita Yukino has somehow managed to look even more beautiful, I'm…awestruck. I'm writhed and I'm impacted. And I have an answer, but I need to know something first.

I lock my black eyes on her blue eyes.

"Yukino, I have probably never heard a more exciting and interesting offer proposal before. And my input is yes. I want you to be my girlfriend.

But. I have to ask this again."

"What do you desire Yukino?"

She ponders a little bit and even brings her thumb and index to her chin as she usually does.

"I desire a lot of things, Hachiman." She looks at me directly in the eyes again

"I desire to change this world like I once told you. I desire to live in freedom. I desire to be competent and self-sufficient, ironically what almost tore us apart is what we both have. Your famous or infamous autonomy. I don't think either of us desire to lose it in its entirety.

But right now, in your arms, I desire you to be with me. I desire to be your girlfriend too. I desire you to be my boyfriend as well."

What did I say? I never expected this. I never saw this coming, at all. When we went on our faux date together back then, I remember assuring myself that I would never date someone like her.

When she left disappointed in that bamboo forest I would never in my wildest delusions think a week later it would come to this. I applied cold hard logic to make an understanding of my interactions with her, I thought and analyzed and made excuses and assumptions.

But when I saw her cry because of the stupidity and hypocrisy of my doing and I felt the end of my relationship with her nearby I acted.

I cannot say I was waiting for this moment all my life, like I said, I didn't know or think possible we could arrive at this point together. But what I am sure is that I wanted this, and I want this, badly.

I think together, no matter how it came to be or how did this happened. We can pursue what we desire. And because we desire each other and our company.

"I see, yesterday you did say only you were fit for the job, and I wholeheartedly think it's true. If there's one girl I really want to associate and hug like I'm currently demonstrating, it's you Yukino. So you'll be in my care from now on."

She lets out a sweet chuckle "I believe you'll be more in my care though, and yes, I claim exclusive rights to these embraces of yours."

"Heh, you're getting tons of Yukino points here, but I'll be more than happy to grant you that exclusivity, come here."

I bring her adjacent to me again and start rubbing her back making her squirm again, in return she tangles her arms around my neck.

Her eyes enrapture me plenty, but now the object of my observation are her pink lips that I now feel a visceral wish of meeting with mine.

I mentally laugh at myself for spouting cool shit. Hiratsuka would be proud of me. And good thing I said that earlier, fuck the mental binds we put on ourselves to act accordingly to expected. Lonerism taught me to be independent, and instead of panicking over how close we are or if this is filthy riajuu behavior or any other bullshit excuse, I want to kiss Yukino.

I start closing in on her face to see affection in the icy eyes that one too many times have left me speechless in the spot, paradoxically, they exude warmth now.

Our breath fuses in the proximity I tilt my head slightly to the right…

Contact.

Freude, schöner Götterfunken

Tochter aus Elysium

Ich betreten feuertrunken

Himmlische, dein Heiligtum!

The first kiss doesn't taste like lemon, but it sure as hell feels incredible. Initially gentle and obviously inexperienced, I delighted myself in Yukino's soft lips that I attack with the growing passion that she mirrors.

I always thought that when this moment arrived I'd feel stupid because I would have to shadow slurp a straw without actually slurping, and I secretly thanked my patheticness because I was sure I'd make an ass of myself. Yet now, I simply let myself go, all that mattered was that we had each other.

After I disconnected our lips our lips I instinctively smiled and she gave me a couple of playful pecks. I return it by getting a soft hold of her chin and kissing her left cheek. Which feels just as good but is less complicated.

"Haah,I certainly did not know how to go on about what we just did."

Her smile widens and I see a sparkle in her arctic blues "Don't worry, neither did I"

"A cubic shitton worth of points for each other?"

"Seems fair."

I have no idea how fast do I have to run to the station in order to make it home so I can shower and put on my uniform, but I think not even all the whacks Hiratsuka has ever given me can bring down the feeling of kissing my girlfriend. It can wait

I cup her right cheek this time and go in for another kiss.

Our youth out of nowhere met what we desire and we reached a crescendo.

What an eventful couple of days.

I don't want to turn 18. These are the last 3 weeks I can publish cringe like this and say 'Oh, I'm a dumbass teenager, I'll see this in a couple of years and die of embarrassment'.

I could swear February was yesterday.

As some might be able to tell, this chapter resembles a little bit to the premise of 'Therefore I am' By GenericOregairuFan, that shit was some well written thing. I've been thinking about it. To the point of wanting to make my own ending 'Therefore we will be'. But I'll wait some months before I type a word. It might be just the emotion after reading it still lingering, if it is I don't want to massacre GOF's effort for nothing. I shall wait.

I also have been discussing with the people from the discord some risky story that I might write on a whim this summer.

The title of the chapter doesn't fit, that closing phrase was an asspull. This chapter was going to be a lot longer and feature the Karaoke outing that Yuigahama suggested, but it's currently 5:43 AM and I have zero energy to write Yuigahama. (This applies to every hour of the day)

Battle station 9 is like halfway written. The promise of a fanfic author over when something is getting published is worth absolute jackshit. My reviews in a lot of dropped good stories speak for themselves.

But if I get motivated and don't fool around too much I might get it out this weekend. Anyways, if I don't then I'll just turn into a bigger hypocrite, there was a 2 month gap between Battle station 5 and 6 anyways.

Take care lads.