Ranma 1/2
Altered Destinies: A scary thought
Note: Although T. helps with pretty much all chapters of AST, this chapter and the next feature very large writing contributions from him, so very special thanks goes out to him for these two chapters in particular.
Edit Note: It's a common convention to call Shampoo's weapons Bonbori. Recently, I've come to find that this likely incorrect, as Bonbori are paper lanterns which while similar in appearance are different things. The proper name seems to be Chui, so I've gone back and edited the name to use this instead.
Chapter 11
Kasumi-kun's eyes blinked as he returned to the land of reality. He felt a cold cloth on his forehead and looked up to see Akane tending him. All around them was pandemonium. Soun was in the process of strangling the life out of Genma, Nodoka was arguing with Shampoo's great grand mother, Nabiki was rubbing her temples, mumbling to herself, and Ranma was pacing back and forth impatiently. About the only calm person was Shampoo who seemed too perplexed by the chaos around her to act, so she merely sat next to Kasumi quietly. When Kasumi saw her she had her eyes turned away, and was directing a look of gratitude at Akane. For a minute he looked at her, trying to puzzle out what exactly was going thru the Amazon's mind at that moment to no avail, and then his father's yells drew his attention.
"Saotome, how could you do this?" Soun shouted as he thumped Genma's head on the floor boards.
"It wasn't my fault! I had no choice!" Genma tried to plead.
"Don't hand me that Saotome! You've gone too far this time!"
"Father, killing him won't help." Kasumi said as he sat up aided by Akane, and a second later Shampoo, who went back to sitting quietly when he was up. His words brought all attention in the room squarely upon him.
"Ah, I see son-in-law is awake." The old woman said with a smile. Kasumi felt a shiver run through his body, not only from the feeling that smile elicited, but more importantly from the words she used. He resisted the urge to look around at Shampoo to see her reaction, if any, to those words.
"Would you like to explain this Kasumi?" Nodoka asked.
Kasumi's reflexive response would probably have been, no, not really. Unfortunately he couldn't just ignore this latest problem. "Um, I'm not exactly sure where to begin." Kasumi managed to say as he tried to recall the 'wedding'. This was important but he was coming up blank.
"Can this wait?" Ranma asked finally as he stopped his pacing. "I have got to get Ryouko back before that wacko does something to her."
"This is serious Ranma." Nodoka replied.
"And this isn't?" Ranma almost yelled, in his frustration at not being able to immediately go after Ryouko's kidnapper.
Nodoka was about to chastise her son then thought better of it. She wanted some time to talk with Shampoo's great grandmother. It would be easier if there were not so many people gathered around. This would give her a chance to talk this over with the old lady without a lot of distractions. "Very well. I think we should let them go." Nodoka said, looking at Soun. Soun merely nodded his compliance and released Genma. Nodoka looked back at Kasumi. "However, we expect an explanation when you return."
Kasumi nodded, but in his mind he was thinking that he needed an explanation as much if not more than anyone else. After all, he was the one who had suddenly found himself with a bride, and with no recollection of how he had acquired her. Akane grabbed Kasumi by the arm and began to lead him out with Ranma.
"Go with them child," Shampoo's great grand mother said to Shampoo. Shampoo who had already risen, nodded and followed the others.
XXXXX
Once outside they met Akira who was waiting, and began quickly walking down the street, in the direction of the more well to do part of town. "Ka...neda, this is Akira, he works at the animal shelter. Akira, this is my cousin." Shampoo gave Kasumi a short glance upon hearing the different name.
"Hello," Kasumi greeted and Akira nodded in response with a friendly smile. Kasumi then turned his attention to Akane. "What exactly is going on Akane?" Kasumi asked.
"Some girl named Azusa stole Ryouko. We have to go get her back."
"Why do you need me?"
Akira spoke up at this point. "I figured it would be smart to get as much help as possible. I asked Ranma and Akane to bring all the reinforcements they could."
"I told you, I didn't need any help," Ranma said.
"And I said, I wouldn't take you there without reinforcements," Akira retorted before continuing his explanation to Kasumi. "You wouldn't believe this girl. Last time we went to get an animal from her place we ran into some pretty nasty traps. I wouldn't be all that surprised if she's added a bit more security after the last time. Beyond that, we usually do this sort of thing when she's not around. She can be quite dangerous if you get her mad, and a sure way to do that is to try and take one of her cute little friends away. I heard she put a whole hockey team in the hospital. This time we have to do it while she's home."
Kasumi nodded in understanding then noticed Akane giving her a questioning look. "So, what's this I hear about you being married? We didn't exactly get any details," Akane asked.
Kasumi opened his mouth to respond but was beaten to it by Shampoo. "He married to Shampoo."
Akane looked over at Shampoo. "And just who, or what is a Shampoo?"
"I Shampoo," the strange girl responded in annoyance. Both Ranma and Akane looked at Kasumi and Shampoo in shock.
"You two are... married?" Ranma asked, dumfounded.
"I suppose... so," Kasumi answered then turned his attention to Shampoo. "Shampoo, when did this happen? I don't remember anything about a marriage."
"How you no can remember? Was big celebration after you beat Shampoo." Shampoo responded in surprise.
"That was a wedding? Oh my, but why? We had barely met."
"Is law, Amazon must marry man who beat her in combat."
"But-" Kasumi started to say in surprise, but was interrupted before he could continue.
"Sounds like a dumb law to me." Akira commented. "You Amazons ever heard of a thing called love?"
"Know love, and marry for love too, not always for law, and not always different things. Love, Law, sometime go together." Shampoo answered, not looking at Kasumi.
Kasumi started at this. Could Shampoo actually have feelings for him? No! She couldn't, not after the way she reacted to his curse before. Could she?
While he was thinking, Ranma picked up the conversation. "So, let me get this straight, if some jerk comes into your village and knocks you out you have to marry the guy, no matters what you think on the matter?" He asked, and Shampoo reluctantly nodded in response. "And... Kaneda here came to your village, beat you, so you married he... him?" Ranma cast a quick look at Akira to see if he had caught Ranma's slip. Shampoo again nodded.
"Sounds suspiciously like rape to me," Akira said. "How the hell can a bunch of Amazons justify such a ludicrous law?"
"Is to bring strong blood into village."
"Strong blood?" Akira echoed. He began to shake his head in disbelief, when a thought occurred to him. He frowned at Kasumi. "I dearly hope you didn't do this on purpose?" He asked Kasumi in a censorious voice.
"No! I knew nothing of this law. I didn't even know until just a while ago that I was... married. I still can't remember anything about signing papers," Kasumi quickly replied as he tried to force the memories to the surface.
"That's good to hear. I can understand a little lack of communication, but forcing a woman to marry you..."
"Is no force!" Shampoo retorted. "Amazon woman obey law. Man beat Amazon in combat, but Amazon marry because of law, not because man force her."
Akira looked at her skeptically; he clearly did not accept her qualifier. He said nothing further on the topic however. He brought their group to a halt by a street corner. "We're here. Better be quiet. We don't want to run into her unless it's absolutely necessary." Everyone nodded and they proceeded forward.
XXXXX
"This is totally out of the question," Nodoka said in frustration. "You cannot truly be considering forcing Kasumi into a marriage-"
"Kasumi is already married. It is a simple fact you cannot deny," Shampoo's great grand mother responded. "We even have the official documentation to prove it."
"I thought we already established that the marriage was between Kasumi as a man and Shampoo. Kasumi isn't a man. She's a woman. The marriage certainly cannot be valid."
"He is as much a man as a woman, it is simply a matter of your point of view, particularly now," the old woman countered.
"Which is another thing, how could you do such a thing to her? It-"
"How could he do such a thing to my great grand daughter? He-"
"She!"
"He!" The Amazon retorted quickly causing Nodoka to sigh in defeat and let the matter drop. "As I was saying, he left my great grand daughter disgraced, dishonored and emotionally distressed."
"And you wish to force this marriage on them?" Nodoka shot back.
"As I have already said, they are already married. The point is mute. He must fulfill his obligations to her."
Nodoka retreated into thought while Soun took up the fight. "But my daughter is already engaged."
"Irrelevant, he is already married, and therefore the engagement must be called off."
Soun sat back in defeat. A few seconds passed then Nodoka took up the fight once again. "Are you totally unwilling to compromise?"
"Why should I?"
"We are dealing with two people's lives here. Do you not wish to see your great grand daughter happy?"
"Yes, of course I do."
"Then call this marriage off. It can never work out-"
"You place powers in me that I simply do not have. It is true that I am the elder council leader, but I am as bound to the law as anyone else. I cannot simply change the laws to suit my own interests, or for Shampoo. This is the only way."
Nodoka shook her head. "I do not see how this will help matters." She paused a moment then continued, hoping to get something from the old woman. "Could you at the very least allow Kasumi to change back?"
"No," the old woman replied resolutely.
"Why not? If Kasumi is a woman then the male Kasumi does not exist, there is no marriage."
"Not so," Cologne said. "Same sex marriages are recognized as legitimate between two Amazons."
"But Kasumi is not an Amazon!" Nodoka said, her eyes brightening with the thought that she had found a loophole.
"Unfortunately he is. The instant he married Shampoo he became an Amazon. I wish that were not the truth, it would make matters much simpler."
"How so?" Nodoka asked.
Cologne shrugged. "Then Shampoo could kill her and we could go home." The others all stared at her in shock. "That is one of our most basic laws. If an Amazon is defeated by an outsider female she must give the kiss of death and kill without delay. Unfortunately, when Kasumi married Shampoo he became an Amazon, and that law no longer applies."
Nodoka was shocked by this revelation, but was not done fighting. "Very well, if Kasumi is still married as a female we can deal with that in some manner. But, until we do can you not at least allow her to live her life in her natural body?"
Cologne shook her head in denial. "In doing so I'd hand over Shampoo's life to her. The Amazon laws regarding same sex marriage clearly state that the stronger of the pair takes all honors and position of the weaker. Shampoo would effectively be left with nothing, particularly if Kasumi decided to fully exploit his advantage."
"Kasumi would never-"
"What he would, or would not do is really irrelevant. If anyone from the village found out about this, and believe me they would, they would enforce it simply to force my family from the council once I step down. My family has headed the council for centuries, and there are many who would use this to force a change. If Kasumi were female, on my death or retirement only she would have the right to that position. Whether he acknowledges that right or not would change nothing. That does not even consider the hardships Shampoo would have to endure since she officially would have no status or position that did not flow from Kasumi." The old woman paused a second then continued. "Centuries ago when the council was petitioned to allow same sex marriages they were reluctant. Our's is a small village and we cannot afford to lose the blood lines that those females who would chose this lifestyle represent. The Elders agreed to the petition, but they created conditions and rules that would preserve the village. They also decreed that the junior partner would have the status of a married male. They did this in order to make the option unappealing to all but the most determined lovers. We may allow same sex marriages, but no Amazon enters into one casually. It is Shampoo's misfortune to have slipped through a crack that the Elders never foresaw. Believe me, no other Amazon will ever suffer a similar fate, but that does not aid my great grand daughter. So believe me when I say nothing will change my mind on this matter."
"I don't suppose divorce is an option?" Nodoka tried desperately.
"Oh, it's an option, but I don't believe you would be all that pleased with the Amazon laws regarding divorce. They would call for one party's death, a thing I am sure you do not want and neither do I."
Nodoka and Soun nodded quickly and fell into thought. Nodoka shook her head as she realized how efficiently they had been trapped into seeming like the 'bad guys' should they not concede the marriage. The only option left was to somehow show the marriage was invalid. Nodoka looked over at her husband who had been quiet the whole time, nervously twiddling his thumbs.
"Okay, Genma, perhaps you would like to tell us exactly what happened?" Nodoka asked, her expression making it clear that 'no' was not an acceptable answer.
XXXXX
"Akane, would you mind being a little more careful?" Ranma asked as he held Akane by the arm as she dangled over an open pit of wooden stakes.
"Shut up Ranma, and pull me up!" Akane yelled back in a mix of fear and anger. Ranma hauled Akane back onto solid ground while the others examined the trap Akane had nearly fallen into.
"That's new," Akira commented. "I really should get overtime for this. There's nothing in my job description about avoiding death traps."
"Perhaps it would be better to go straight inside," Kasumi suggested.
"Yeah, that way she can kill us nice and legal like." Akira replied deadpan and walked over next to the wall of the house. "Any of you good a climbing shear walls?" Akira asked sarcastically.
To his surprise everyone answered simultaneously, "Yes."
"O...kay, well then, why don't you guys look in the windows and see if you can see anything. If we're lucky we'll find your dog and we won't have to search through the whole house." The others nodded and started climbing up the wall to various different windows on the upper floors while Akira searched the lower windows.
"What dog look like?" Shampoo asked as she looked inside one of the windows.
"Well, she's real big, has grayish fur-" Ranma began to answer as he looked through another window.
"Look like wolf?"
"Ahhh, sort of," Ranma responded, a hint of nervousness creeping into his voice.
Akane and Kasumi notice this and gave Ranma suspicious looks. "Ryouko's a wolf?" Akane blurted out.
"Ahhh, do you see her Shampoo?" Ranma said, avoiding the question.
"See girl and wolf, but wolf have pink fur," Shampoo answered. The others climbed over to her and looked in as well while Akira waited below.
As soon as Ranma looked in he let out a startled yell. It was indeed Ryouko except her fur was dyed pink and she had numerous red bows tied into her fur. She lay unconscious on the ground as Azusa happily tied another bow onto her. Ranma let out another yell, this time of outrage, and before anyone could stop him he smashed the window and jumped in. The others quickly chased after him.
"You little brat! What did you do Ryouko?" Ranma yelled out as he ran towards them.
"Who are you? Go away! You can't have Azusa's little Charolette!" Azusa said as she stepped between Ranma and Ryouko.
"Get out of the way or you're going to get-"
Ranma never finished his threat. Instead Shampoo suddenly appeared and threw a punch at Azusa, sending her flying through the air into the far wall and knocking her out. "No bother with silly talk. Take animal and go." Shampoo said, turning her back on them and walking over to the window Ranma had smashed. Everyone looked between her and Azusa in shock for a moment then Ranma took her advice and picked up his unconscious pet.
XXXXX
A short time later, Akira left the foursome plus wolf at the gate to the Tendo home. Ryouko was stuck presently in what Kasumi could best describe as a mixture of complete catatonic shock and over boiling fury. Despite Ranma's best efforts to cheer her up she remained despondent. Kasumi feared that once the shock broke Ryouko's anger would be violently released.
Once they stepped inside they heard Nodoka's, Soun's and Genma's voices. Genma appeared to be recounting the early part of their arrival at the Amazon village, although it was clear from the shake slipping into his words every few seconds he was scared out of his mind. Kasumi could somewhat feel for him. He was dreading the inevitable explanation himself, especially now with the complication of this marriage.
"Maybe a bath would-" Ranma started to say much to Ryouko's dismay but Kasumi quickly jumped in.
"I don't think that would be wise. She's seems way too tense for one right now. Besides, the dye is already set in."
"Yeah, guess you're right. Come on Ryouko," Ranma said and started to lead a slightly relieved Ryouko upstairs. Kasumi sighed, disaster temporarily averted. Now was not the time for Ukyo's secret to be revealed.
"I guess we should wait till they're through with Uncle Saotome," Akane said, then followed Ranma. Kasumi gladly took advantage of the temporary reprieve and went with her, Shampoo coming up behind them. Ranma stepped into his room with Ryouko while Akane stopped in front of the door to Kasumi's room.
"Is boy brother?" Shampoo asked, gesturing towards Ranma's room.
"Ah, no, not really. Actually he's my... fiancé. My future husband," he continued when he saw Shampoo's blank look.
Shampoo looked back at the door to Ranma's room with a pensive expression. He has a lover, Shampoo thought and almost felt stabbed by this new information. As if her situation wasn't bad enough as it was.
Shampoo took her eyes from the door and walked on into Kasumi's room followed by Akane. The sound of scratching at Akane's door quickly caused Kasumi to dash in after them.
"Shampoo, about this cat tongue thing, can you not convince your great grand mother to remove it?" Kasumi asked.
Shampoo shook her head. "Great grand mother say bad for marriage be girl, girl. Shampoo title Kasumi title then." Both Akane and Kasumi tried to puzzle through the meaning of Shampoo's statement. Shampoo sighed then tried again. "Sorry, Shampoo still learn Japanese. If Shampoo married to girl Kasumi then Kasumi take all Shampoo title. You understand?"
"I believe so, but could we not work that out later?"
"What if no can work out? Shampoo have nothing then. No, you stay boy. Better that way."
"But that's not fair," Akane responded.
"Life no fair. This no fair to Kasumi. Other no fair to Shampoo. Less two evil." Shampoo said then sat down on the bed. At this moment Ranma walked in. Shampoo glared at him, but he was oblivious.
"How's Ryouko?" Akane asked.
"Miserable, what do you think?" Ranma snapped back.
"Gees, just asking."
"Sorry," Ranma mumbled then looked at Shampoo. After a moment a small smile appeared on his face. "Guess the engagement is off seeing as how you're married and all."
Shampoo jolted at this. He dared to treat her husband's love so casually, the pig!
"You're a tactless jerk, Ranma." Akane said with an angry shake of her head and Shampoo nodded in agreement.
"What? It's the truth, isn't it?"
"Yeah, but it's not like Kasumi wanted this, you dork!"
The two quickly degenerated into a match of heated words. Kasumi shook his head and was about to cut off the argument when he noticed Ryouko walk by the doorway. Having Ryouko wandering around in her present state of mind wasn't good.
Akane opened her mouth to respond to Ranma's rebuttal but Kasumi spoke first. "Akane, it's all right. Why don't you two show Shampoo around. I could use the time to think." Akane reluctantly nodded and directed Shampoo to follow her and Ranma.
Shampoo did not want to go want to leave, but then it occurred to her that this was an opportunity to observe her husband's lover. She followed Akane out of the room.
XXXXX
Kasumi waited a minute to be sure that the three were well on their way to the dojo. That, of course, was in the minds of all three of them, the primary feature of the house.
Satisfied that the coast was clear, Kasumi slipped out of his room and headed in the direction of the bathroom. He was worried about Ukyo. Despite her anger she had still been very groggy a few minutes ago, walking with a pronounced stumble as she made her way past Kasumi's room. Anger, depression and a clouded mind could be a dangerous combination. He was glad that Ranma had not spotted her. There was no telling what she might do if Kasumi's suspicions turned out correct. Not having to worry about Ranma's reaction was a welcome relief in a day already full of disasters.
Moving as silently as a shadow he ghosted down the hallway, pausing at the top of the stairwell and listened intently. From below floated up the heated voice of Nodoka and his father. Their voices only paused every few minutes to allow Genma to make an explanation. Genma was lying of course. Kasumi could not make out his words, but if he was speaking he was lying. Of that fact Kasumi was certain. He desperately wanted to question Genma himself, but the opportunity for that would not come for a while. Hopefully father would not hurt him too badly. Kasumi did not want to have to worry about his conscience being pricked by an injured Genma. He did not want anything to interfere in his interview with his 'teacher'.
All that had to be put aside for now. Kasumi could only deal with one disaster at a time and it was Ukyo's turn at the moment. Having determined that it was safe to proceed he made his way down the stairs and around the corner to the bathroom. With relief he made his objective undetected and taking one last look around he slipped into the laundry room. He slid the door shut behind him, and breathed a sigh of relief at having made it this far with no new disaster appearing. He moved stealthily towards the other end of the laundry room, and the entrance to the bathroom.
Before he had managed more than two steps a sound came from the other side of the door that raised Kasumi's hackles. From the bathroom came a curious mixture of laughter and crying mixed together in a most unsettling way. Stealing himself for what he knew he was going to see Kasumi slid the door open. On the other side of the room Ukyo stood. She had changed forms, and was now standing in front of the mirror staring at herself, all the while running her hands through her hair. Something in the transformation process had warped the dye that Azusa has used, and instead of one uniform shade of pink it now covered the full spectrum of pink, from pale almost blond to so deep it was almost as purple as Shampoo's hair. Ukyo stood there laughing and crying as she stroked her fingers through the nightmare her long beautiful hair had become.
Now that he was close enough Kasumi could make out words mixed in with the other noises Ukyo was making. "Wanted to tell Ranma, guess I don't have to worry now. Pink wolf, pink Ukyo, what's to figure." Slowly she collapsed, folding up until she was kneeling on the floor, a pinkish ball of misery. This was not good, Ukyo might truly do something stupid if Kasumi did not do something.
Before he could think of anything Ukyo noticed his presence. "What the hell do you want?" She nearly yelled, standing up and facing Kasumi. She lifted a hand and dashed the tears from her eyes. Then, she glared at Kasumi, daring her to say something.
"Ukyo-"
"Shut up!" Ukyo growled angrily. "You haven't won yet you know. I don't know how, but I'll beat this thing."
Kasumi was amazed at the change in Ukyo, from despondent to rock certainty in the space of a few seconds. Then he realized what it was. As much as her experience had affected Ukyo there was one thing that was more powerful then her recent trauma, her hatred of Kasumi. No matter what, Ukyo would never allow herself to surrender if it meant she had to concede a victory to Kasumi.
For the first time since she had appeared Kasumi was glad of Ukyo's unreasoning hatred. It gave her something to hold on to in the face of adversity. He looked at her in admiration. She had gone from a huddled ball of misery to a proud defiant woman in the space of a few breaths. The straggled multi shaded hair now dried, flared around her head in a corona. A sudden impulse took hold of Kasumi and like a witness at an auto wreck he found he could not resist looking. For just a second his eyes flickered down, just for a fraction of a second but enough to show that whatever else she might be, Azusa was certainly thorough. He blushed at his weakness, but thankfully Ukyo did not notice his momentary lapse. He had enough problems with Shampoo without adding that complication as well. All he needed was Ukyo to decide he was a pervert on top of everything else.
This situation seemed relatively stable for the moment. However, it was best to let Ukyo think she had the field for now and not antagonize her further. "Well, I guess you win this round then Ukyo." Kasumi said and, nodding his head at the defiant girl, he stepped out into the laundry room. Once there he leaned against the linen closet, and sent a prayer to the gods, thanking them for sparing him at least one problem. Not having to deal with a clinically depressed wolf was at least one thing he would not have to worry about.
"Kasumi! Could you come in here please," Nodoka called out from the common room. Kasumi sighed, the time had finally come.
Just a few short minutes later everyone was gathered in the common room. Kasumi sat at the table the object of everyone's attention in the room, particularly one pink wolf's. He still wasn't ready for this, but it was useless to delay any longer.
"When you're ready," Nodoka prodded and Kasumi nodded.
He took in a deep breath that helped to calm his nerves. "Well, I'll tell you what I remember, which is a bit sketchy. It was shortly after we went to Jusenkyo…" Kasumi began and let his mind regress back to that day.
XXXXX
Kasumi sighed and pulled the belt on Genma's second best Gi a bit tighter. If things did not improve soon he would be able to go back to wearing his own clothes, he thought... without the need of hot water first. He shifted the heavy burden of his two backpacks, twisting his shoulders in an effort to move the straps from the place where they were trying to wear two holes in his shoulders. He frowned at the plump panda that was strolling along several feet in front of him, happy and unburdened. Kasumi was sure he would be whistling if he had the lips to do so. Every now and then the black and white bear would snag a bamboo shoot, and happily chew on it while continuing to walk along. Kasumi had never been that good at scrounging food and without the motivation of hunger Genma had no interest in exerting himself. Gods I'm hungry, he thought. This body burns food like a furnace. At that moment Kasumi's stomach registered its own vote on the matter letting out a loud liquid rumble. Kasumi blushed as the guide turned to stare at him, his attention drawn by the sudden loud noise.
"No worry Miss Customer, we find food soon. Very famous village just over hill in next valley. We get food there, I thinking."
Genma looked up at the mention of food and promptly decided he had eaten enough bamboo for a life time. Time for some real food. He picked up the pace, and started trotting up the long slope ahead of them. Soon his sensitive nose picked up the savory smells that were floating over the rise ahead. Spurred on by the smell his pace increased to the point where the others were forced to run to keep up.
Mere minutes later, they crested the hill and found themselves looking down at a picturesque native village. It was built on a rise in the bottom of the valley, in the shadow of a white shouldered giant of a mountain peak. Huts were scattered with no apparent plan, but a broad empty area ran through the middle of the scattered houses. One end of that area widened out into a considerable space. In that space what looked like the entire village was gathered. Genma did not give the impressive view a single glance. He had spotted a heavily laden table holding more food then he had seen in a month, and it completely captured all his attention. Unable to control himself, not that he really tried, he rushed ahead with no thought or caution. Kasumi and the Guide trotted along in his wake.
As he got close to the village Kasumi saw that fortunately for Genma the villagers were all concentrating their attention on a large log held a dozen feet off the ground by four ropes that slanted down at an angle, two at each end. They held the log secure but allowed it to move lengthwise making for a less than secure footing for the two figures that leaped up and onto opposite ends of it.
The guide exclaimed upon seeing the activity. "Oh, we very much lucky. This famous Amazon village. We get here good time. They having o so famous tournament. This deciding champion of village. Very lucky to get here now Miss Customer I thinking."
"Amazon," Kasumi exclaimed. Sure enough after a close examination he was able to determine that indeed both the contestants were women. One, a purple haired young woman, was easy. She could have been identified as female by a blind man... on the opposite side of a noisy room. The other was much harder to identify as female. Indeed, if the guide had not mentioned they were Amazons, and by definition female, he doubted he would have guessed her gender.
By now Kasumi and the guide had caught up with Genma who was stuffing his face with a large ham hock. Kasumi was tempted, but his inherent politeness, much battered though it was after ten years in Genma's company, made him stand stoically while waiting for the current contest to end. He could inquire after about getting something to eat.
At first he thought the attractive young girl badly out matched by her much larger opponent. He quickly realized that it was the other way around. The young girl was faster than anyone Kasumi had ever seen. She was inside her opponent's guard in a flash, and then demonstrated considerable strength by knocking her opponent's large iron headed mace aside with one of the two hollow steel Chui she carried. Then, with a blow from the other, she sent her opponent rocketing through the air. A cheer went up from the spectators, and the young girl lifted her hands in victory, a broad smile on her face. Kasumi applauded along with the rest. The young girl was truly an accomplished martial artist.
Turning on the log, hands still in the air, the victor's eyes fell on Kasumi and widened in appreciation. Then, just as quickly they narrowed in anger. One of her hands lashed down and the Chui in it flashed across the intervening space between Kasumi and her. Kasumi reflexively swayed to the side allowing it to fly past. It continued on and smashed the bench in front of the banquet table dumping a startled Genma onto the ground.
The girl shouted angrily.
"Why you let bear eat food. This food for winner of contest, she say," the guide translated. The girl continued on to say something else. "She say you have fine panda give to them and leave." The Guide gave Genma a short look. "Make children in village very happy, nice plump panda. That what she say," the Guide finally said after a second.
XXXXX
"That not what Shampoo say," Shampoo jumped in, giving Genma a dirty look, then thought for a moment to get the words right. Her limited Japanese, however, failed her and she spoke the proper line to her great grand mother.
"It would seem your guide was a little less than accurate. Her actual statement was: How dare you let your animal eat my prize. This food was for the champion. How dare you take what you have not earned. You will have to replace what you have stolen. We will take your animal and roast him for my victory dinner." Genma swallowed loudly when he realized how close he had come to being the main course. The old woman paused for a second to talk to Shampoo. "Perhaps Shampoo should add in the missing bits. It would be better for all of us if the story was as accurate and complete as possible."
Kasumi sighed then nodded and continued on, Shampoo beginning to regress into the tale herself.
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Kasumi fought down the urge to agree. It would serve Genma right to spend a week of so being pawed by a group of children, but he controlled the urge. There had to be some way to get out of this honorably, but they had no money to pay for the food Genma had stolen. "Do they have any work we could do to pay for the food?"
"The young man wishes to know if he might work to pay for the food his animal has eaten." The guide translated.
Shampoo seethed with anger. What an insult! How dare he come here and take what's not his and think he can get away with it, she thought. "No, this is not about cost, this is about honor. Each family brings food for the contest, the winner gives the food back to the festival this evening. His carelessness has destroyed part of our festival. We do not need money or work done, we need food for the party. Tell him again, give us the panda to replace the food it destroyed."
"No, that what she say," the guide translated.
Kasumi blinked. Surely she said more than that, he thought but dismissed it as just the quick translation and hung his head to think. Reluctantly he decided there was no alternative. Kasumi turned to the guide and asked him. "Is it permitted that I fight for the championship?"
The guide looked startled and exclaimed. "Very bad thing, you sure you wish do? Amazons very fierce fighter, have much pride, they not be gentle if lose. Please Miss Customer, give bear to Amazons. You no want fight, I thinking." The Guide gave Genma a dirty look, clearly blaming him for their current trouble.
"I have no choice. There is no other way I can see to settle this with honor."
"I ask then." He turned to the girl who had been watching the exchange with impatience and growing anger.
"The young man begs to inquire as to whether it would be allowable for him to challenge you." At this Shampoo started, and murmurs arose from the crowd.
"What a waste, look at him prime stuff if I ever saw it."
"Yeah, try not to hurt him where it counts Shampoo. We might get some use out of him before Cologne gets back to perform the operation."
"Hey, maybe we could offer to let him work off his dept after all. Nudge, Nudge wink, wink, if you know what I mean."
After Shampoo had malleted the Monty Python fan she turned to face Kasumi. Challenged by a man, a good looking... no, gorgeous man, but still... She examined him in a new light. He didn't seem the lecherous sort, out to get himself an easy bride. In fact, by looking at him she would have guessed he knew nothing of the law at all. However, she could certainly see herself with this man. Of course, he'd have to win which wasn't likely. Too bad actually, such a waste. "I will accept your challenge, but I wish you had given us your panda. Pandas can be replaced." Turning her back she walked over to the suspended log, and lightly leaped onto the far end. Turning she motioned for Kasumi to join her on the log. Then, she stood there with a grim look on her face as Kasumi walked over to the end opposite hers.
Kasumi was thinking fast as he made his way towards the log. This will not be easy. He didn't know his own strength accurately yet. With his longer reach he could easily do her serious harm. Striking at pressure points was out for the same reason. That left throws and grips and it was not going to be easy getting by those maces of hers. Still, it was the only way, but he might be able to up the odds a little if he played up to her confidence. The woman she just beat was taller and outweighed Kasumi. She wouldn't see his size as a reason to be cautious.
Reaching his end of the log, Kasumi refrained from leaping lightly up, and instead looked around for some other means of climbing up onto the log. After a moment the watching Amazons realized what Kasumi was looking for. With much snickering two of them went and got the ladder that was used to hang the ropes from the uprights during the setup for the contest. Leaning it against the large cross log they waited until Kasumi had scrambled up and then carried it back to where it had come from.
"Not like the outsider is going to need this again," one remarked to a friend.
"That's so, Shampoo will be most pleased to assist him in dismounting."
Kasumi stood facing Shampoo, knees bent and arms held out from his side giving every impression that he was fighting to maintain his balance on a surface wide enough for two to walk abreast. Seeing this Shampoo felt a twinge of regret. She should have refused to allow him to challenge her. He might never had known she was obliged to accept a challenge from an outsider male. It was an uncommon occurrence given the penalty for losing, but her own pride had made her agree. Now, looking at the discomfort he displayed, she was regretting that. She could take some criticism for dodging a challenge, but he wouldn't be able to take the results of his loss. She decided then and there that she would strike to kill. Despite killing on the challenge log being considered the mark of a clumsy warrior, she would not see this handsome outsider suffer the consequences of his rash actions.
Kasumi studied his foe intently, and noted the slight change in stance and the altered grip on her weapons. She was not playing around. This was not going to be a simple contest like the previous conflict. He started to shuffle down the log towards his attractive opponent. Holding his arms wide spread and sliding one foot ahead of the other, it looked like the motion of someone who was unsure of his balance. However, if anyone had studied his stance closely they would have seen that even though it left him wide open, at no time was he not solidly planted, ready to react to anything. Shampoo let him get to within two yards before making her move. Sliding forward she lashed out with her right hand mace, holding the other in reserve for the final blow. Kasumi swayed to the side and slipped... For a moment time seemed to stand still, and then it resumed. Shampoo saw her opponent start to fall and lashed out with her reserve weapon, hoping to strike a killing blow before he fell beyond her reach.
Kasumi saw the second weapon strike out at his head, and he pulled back just enough to allow the mace to swing by, brushing his hair and missing his skull by the thickness of a five yen piece. His upper body fell past the log. Suddenly the arm which he had held wide spread in an apparent attempt at maintaining his balance struck the log. Curling his arm, Kasumi converted the momentum of his fall into a spinning motion as he rotated his body around the log, using his arm as the pivot point. Looping around he brought his legs up and over the opposite side just as Shampoo realized what had happened. Before she could do anything about it Kasumi's feet had come to rest in the small of her back, and when he straightened his knees she was catapulted off the log and landed sprawling on the ground.
Shampoo was stunned. The fight was won, and the next instant she had lost. With a gentle thump the man dropped from the log, the ease of his motions in direct contrast to the clumsy way he had moved mere moments before. She should have considered the way he had dogged her Chui earlier. Instead she had made an amateur's mistake and judged him by the surface appearance. Handsome and pretty under the dust he might be, but now that she was looking for it she could see he was not just pretty. Those were well trained muscles coating his body, and the smooth way he was now moving put her in mind of a tiger she had studied for a week three years ago.
She became aware of the dead silence from both the onlookers and the outsider. There was a collective holding of breath, waiting to see what she would do. What could she do, it was not as if she had any choice in the matter, especially here and with so many witnesses. She raised herself from the ground, and as she brushed the dust from her clothes she studied him surreptitiously. Her head was lowered as if she were giving full attention to the task of removing dirt, but from under lowered lids her eyes watched his every motion. He had tensed as she had risen, prepared to resume the battle, and this was puzzling. He had won, she would not attack now. As she began to clean her clothes, he relaxed slightly only to tense again as she stood up and faced him. It looked like she had guessed right; he knew nothing of the law.
Slowly, offering no threat, she approached him, moving slowly closer until she stood within striking distance. He remained cautious, but made no move to distance himself from her. There was a collective in drawing of breath as she moved closer still and raised her hands to either side of his face. He remained calm, but prepared. He was looking at her with intimate awareness of every motion she made. She studied his face carefully, unmindful that several of the women surrounding them were turning slightly blue from holding their breath. They did not want to miss a single moment of this very rare occurrence. There was no dissipation in his face. It was an open honest countenance. Decision made, she exerted a gentle pressure on the side of his face offering no threat, but merely asking him to lower his face to her level. After a second hesitation he did so keeping his eyes intent on hers, looking for the first sign of an attack. Shampoo slowly and gently wrapped her arms around his neck giving him no cause for alarm. Bringing her lips close to his ears she murmured the traditional phrase. "You I love." She found that the line was very easy to say, and surprising enough she actually believed it. Then gently she kissed his cheek.
As she moved away from him a roar erupted from the crowd and they flooded forward to offer congratulations to the new bride and groom.
Kasumi felt as if he had been branded. His entire sense of touch seemed to be concentrated on two square inches of skin. Her...no his first kiss. He raised a hand to his cheek and felt it. There should be a difference, he thought, but under his fingers there was none. He had been kissed on the cheek before, by her mother, her aunt, her sisters... Why did this girl's kiss burn so? Was it because of the curse? Was it far more complete then he had thought? He had not felt any difference in the last two weeks. If he closed his eyes he still saw himself as female in his mind. If he did not touch his body he still felt like a female. It was just his shell that was changed. His mind was as female as ever. That's what he had been telling himself. If that was the case, however, why was his heart beating faster? Why could he not take his eyes of the face of this girl?
He suddenly realized that he was surrounded by a yelling screaming mob that seemed determined to knock his backbone out his chest. The laughter and smiles reassured him. They certainly take losing well in this village, he thought. He spotted the guide and Genma, now in human form, waving frantically at him from the outskirts of the crowd. Pushed back by the throng that surrounded him and the purple haired girl, he waved at them cheerily to show all was fine and then went back to enjoying the party.
Someone shoved a chunk of fine cheese into his hand, and he eagerly bit in to it. The hunger he had put aside for the fight was now back with a vengeance. His Purple haired companion was handed two large mugs of liquid, one of which she handed to Kasumi.
Kasumi cautiously sniffed and smelling only fruit juice so took a sip. It was cold and refreshing. His body was dearly in need of liquids so raising the mug he swallowed the contents in one continuous swallow. The crowd cheered heartily and Kasumi flushed with embarrassment. Suddenly a sensation like a fireball exploding in his belly ripped through him and he exhaled violently. He was surprised to see he was not breathing fire. He bent over wheezing. His companion patted him on the back while the surrounding crowd laughed. After a minute he was able to stand under his own power though his eyes continued to water. Remembering something Genma has said in a similar circumstance he repeated it. "Smoooooth." Looking at the mug in his hand he wondered what it had been. Liquid fruit flavored fire to judge from his experience. That did not prevent him from taking another mug, however, but he was much more cautious in the amount he drank at one time. As his companion linked arms with him he alternated eating the contents of one hand while sipping from the container in the other. Whenever either hand was empty someone in the surrounding crowd was sure to fill it with either food or drink, whatever was required.
Finally, the edge taken off his hunger, Kasumi looked down at the purple haired fighter who had not left his side since the fight. I can't keep thinking of her as a head of hair, Kasumi thought. Getting the girl's attention he pointed at his chest and said, "Kasumi," then he pointed at the girl and raised an eyebrow in what he hoped was an inquiring way. His companion caught on quickly, and after a repeat performance reciprocated the action.
Tapping her chest she said, "Shan Pu."
"Shampoo?" Kasumi repeated with some doubt.
When the girl nodded her head and said, "Kasumi," tapping his chest and then her own saying, "Shan Pu," Kasumi had to accept that unlikely as it seems her name was indeed Shampoo.
"Well, Shampoo, now that I've eaten and drunk it must be time to make merry." Kasumi was vaguely aware in a disconnected sort of way that he was not really behaving like himself. As a she, he had learned that it was best to keep to herself. Many people resented her skill, feeling that it was not proper behavior for a woman, especially in the more rural areas, and you could not get much more rural than this. Suddenly he experienced what seemed a flash of inspiration. "Hey, now I'm a guy, right? Isn't that right, Shampoo?" Not waiting for a reply he continued. "Damn right! I'm a guy now. I can do all the things that guys do: Go out alone, dance at parties without all the girls thinking I'm trying to steal their boyfriends..." He suddenly got remorseful. "I've never had a real boyfriend…" he said then frowned in remembrance. He doesn't count, he thought then refocused back on the present and his current companion. "Can you believe that?" He turned so he could look straight on at Shampoo. "I mean, look at me. I'm a hot looking babe, ain't I? I hear all the guys saying so when I walk by, or when I work out in a public area." He swayed a bit. "So why don't I got no one eh? Why is that?"
Kasumi had just drunk more alcohol in the last fifteen minutes then he had in the entirety of his previous life. That combined with the years of associating with Genma were taking their toll on his reasoning ability, and in his muddled state he was slipping into the dialect and mode of talk that had surrounded him for most of the last ten years.
Shampoo just looked at him with a smile on her face. She really didn't understand anything he was saying, but he seemed to be enjoying himself. After a moment she moved in closer and hugged Kasumi, rubbing his chest with her cheek.
"Hey, you can't do that," Kasumi said in a slightly flustered and slurred voice. "I mean, you're a girl and I'm a g... O wait, that's right, I'm not a girl, am I?" He continued in a sing song voice, "never going to be a guurl again, never going to be a guurl again." Stopping suddenly he experienced what seemed like a profound insight. He decided to share it with Shampoo. "Hey, guess what. If I'm not a girl, then I don't need a boyfriend, right? If I'm a boy, I need a girl friend, right? Will you be my girlfriend Shampoo?" Kasumi paused a minute waiting for a reply. When none came he gave a laugh and continued. "O wait, you can't understand, can you?" He stopped again, trying to think of a way around this difficulty. Then he snapped his fingers, or tried to, all that happened was he rubbed his fingers together. "Sign language, that's the ticket, universal language that is. Now, how would you tell a girl you want her to be your girlfriend in sign language?" Kasumi brought his hand up near his face and wiggled his fingers in front of his slightly out of focus eyes, trying to think of a sign she could use.
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About this time Kasumi suddenly realized that Shampoo's great grand mother was doing most the talking. Somehow she was able to fill in the part that Kasumi memories were cloudy about. But now, when he heard her speaking it clicked the memories into place. Even with his recollections being limited and distorted he had known he had acted... oddly but this... However, with a sense of growing anxiety he realized that none of it was being made up.
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Shampoo sighed happily as she pressed herself tightly against her husband. He was babbling, but that was to be expected with the amount of Great Grand mothers special stock he had consumed. She was feeling more than a little giddy herself. Being so close to him made her feel like she had never felt before, sort of at peace. So, this is what she had been missing all this time. She noticed that her rubbing had caused Kasumi's top to part slightly. Caught up in the moment she turned her face towards him and lightly kissed the base of his throat.
"That's it," Kasumi shouted. He picked up the startled Shampoo. "That's how you tell a girl you want her to be your girlfriend in sign language. Matching action to words." He lifted Shampoo up until their faces were level and kissed her. It was clumsy and awkward, but after a minute they seemed to find the best position and it was not so clumsy then. After about twenty seconds Kasumi let Shampoo down with a rather dazed look in her eyes. "That was interesting." He finally managed. Shampoo blinked as she tried to contend with the feelings overwhelming her. She really had been missing a lot. She nestled back into her former position, attached firmly to Kasumi, head resting on his chest.
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The old woman stopped to let the last tidbit set in. With the exception of the two Amazons and Genma everyone at the table was in various states of shock. Kasumi just wished he could faint again before the inevitable explosion.
End Chapter 11
Chapter 12, with the conclusion of the flash back is in the process of editing at the moment, so it shouldn't be long.
For anyone paying real close attention to the original versions may notice a few changes here due to mess ups in writing. In particular, Kasumi originally said she had no boyfriends but that's inaccurate (although she would likely want to forget the one she had at this point in time).
Bye for now.