the song stuck in my head
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(for rarepair week 2022, day 1: dream)
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Even at eighteen, Gray still wasn't totally used to wet dreams. The dreams in which he imagines himself with another, his mouth over theirs, their hands traversing his chest and own, the way in which he'd wake with an uncomfortable erection or sticky sheets. While he'd thought that he'd find pleasure in them, once the embarrassment died, having a dream about a friend is definitely… less than ideal. Especially when that friend is sleeping in the hotel futon next to you.
Gray glanced at the motel clock, which blinked a green 3:46am, and his sleeping mission partner, Loke. He was relatively new to the guild, a womanizer with an unspoken past – not that he's ever told Gray. But Gray knows enough about heartbreaking pasts to know when someone else has one.
Loke was also the subject of Gray's most recent dream.
The boy sighed and turned onto his back, his short ginger messy from the pillow. Careful to not wake him up, Gray shifted out of his thankfully-dry sheets to take a shower.
As the cold water ran over his hair, Gray reflected on why he might be thinking this way. When Loke invited him on this mission to a beach town, Gray expected trouble from the low-level criminals they were tracking or Loke's ex-girlfriends or even the plenty of tourist traps along the water. He did not expect to be haunted by the image of Loke at the beach that morning, water dripping down his cheeks and his swim trunks tight around his muscular thighs. Or how, when an underpaid teenager lost control of their ice-cream cart, Loke pulled Gray out of the way, how Loke's hands gripped Gray's bicep or how him bumping against Loke's chest and … other areas wrangled a rough inhale from his friend. He just couldn't seem to forget the hot breath against the base of his neck or his friend's apologetic, gleaming smile when he finally let go or his friend bending down to pick up the ice cream cart's sign, the way his back flexed, the power in those toned muscles. Gray's mouth had dried at the sight. His mouth, remembering the beach, dried again.
Gray turned the shower off. The cold water had helped his more, ah, immediate issue, but it didn't change how Gray felt like a pervert. He knew it was normal to find people attractive, but Loke was a) his peer at the guild, b) most likely straight, and c) his friend. It was too complicated.
As Gray exited the bathroom, towel wrapped around his hips in uncharacteristic modesty, Loke sat up.
"Gray?" he asked, sleep muffling his words.
He froze at the doorway. Why did he feel so nervous? It was just a dream. It didn't mean anything; yet, Loke's glinting eyes trapped him. Is this what a mouse felt like under a cat's paw?
(It probably felt less erotic for the mouse.)
"Did you have a bad dream?" Loke fumbled for his glasses. Dark shrouded the room, but Gray could still make out his friend's face in the moonlight from the hotel window.
He shook his head.
"You can tell me if you had a bad dream, you know?" Loke said.
"It wasn't that."
Loke squinted at him. "You're wet."
"I took a shower."
"At four in the morning?"
Gray flushed. "You know…"
Loke paused and then muttered something. Gray caught forgot and humans and maybe boner? It made him more embarrassed.
"It's normal," Loke said.
"I don't want to talk about it."
"A lot of people dream about sex."
"I don't see you getting them. Probably 'cause all your girlfriends wanna hop on your dick."
"Not just girls."
Gray's irritation transformed into confusion. "Huh?"
"I don't only sleep with women." Perhaps Gray imagined it, but his friend's tilted head: was it thoughtfulness over their late-night discussion of sexuality or a subtle appreciation of Gray's exposed body? Gray's own eyes drifted down Loke's bare chest and toned arms, illuminated by the full moon, before snapping up to those hazel eyes, thankful for the dark room hiding his blush.
Loke opened his mouth, then snapped it shut. Something was in the air. The tension was taut, but he didn't know what exactly that tension was.
"Go to bed," Loke eventually said, laying back down. "We still have to finish our mission tomorrow and you're not at your best when you haven't slept."
Gray wordlessly returned to his futon. As he drifted off to sleep, he glanced over at the planes of his friend's back, where the green guild mark stretched between his shoulder blades. Unbidden heat rolled in his stomach and he closed his eyes.
Gray's dreams wouldn't go away anytime soon.
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endnote: The title is fromfavorite record by fall out boy. all comments, whether it be compliments or constructive criticism, are appreciated 33