I slowly make my way into the forest. It is my ritual. Every day, I walk into the forest and just sit. Ever since I woke up that morning to complete darkness I have been coming to the river bank and just sitting. I don't know why, but it offers the only feeling of familiarity. Even without my eyes, my body seems to know these woods. As if I have spent a lifetime exploring them.
I sit on the damp soil and listen to the life throughout the forest. I can hear the birds' morning songs and the deer walking through the forest. I let out a small smile and trace the raised skin over my heart.
My fingers trace the letters. Velaris.
The word seems to hold so much weight, but my memories always come up blank.
I should be used to the familiar disappointment I have been used to for the last couple of months.
When I woke up on the cold ground in front of that house I thought I was going to die. It would have been a blessing as the pain rippled through my body. I was sore and malnourished.
If the villagers didn't hear my screams I would have surely died. They took pity on my crumpled form and nursed me back to health. Scars lined my thin frame.
There were days I wished they left me to die.
Listening to the natural music in the forest pulled me from those dark thoughts. I still can't remember who I am or the events that led me to where I am now.
The only thing I know for certain is the hundreds of scars that create a map along my body. Every morning, I wake up from the darkness of my dreams to enter the emptiness of reality. I trace the jagged and raised lines along my body. I count each one. They ground me to reality. They give me hope that I once had a life before the darkness.
The people in town don't remember who I am. I am just as much a stranger to them as I am to myself. It was like I was erased from the world only to be dropped back into it as a cruel joke.
I sit on the river bank until I feel the warmth of the sun is replaced by the chill of the moon. I slowly walk back to the empty house the village lets me use. I use my hands to trace the familiar path and make it back home safely.
I walk up the steps and smell the sweet scent of lilacs.
"Hello Elain," I say quietly and sit on the top step next to the gentle soul that sometimes brings me flowers from her gardens.
"I brought you a new set of flowers!" Her crisp voice chirps. I slowly open my palms and a bouquet is laid into my hands. I raise them to my nose and smile at the lovely smell.
Flowers always bring a grin to my face. I love the smell. The feeling of the soft petals on my fingers.
"Is your father still away?" I ask.
"Yes," Elain said. "We had to send all our staff away too. It wasn't practical to have them all here anymore."
I knew exactly what she was talking about. Over the last couple of months, word has spread of a war going on. Nobody has details, but the fear has spread through the small village.
I am surprised that Elain is sharing this with me. Usually, her words are superficial and flowery. She does not want to upset me more than I already am.
I never understood the Archeron sisters. Nesta and Elain are the only two in the village who treat me with an underline sense of belonging. Almost as if they knew me in another life.
They never said anything, but I sometimes dreamed that I was their third sister they never talked about. I didn't even know her name.
Nesta refused to talk to me. Even when I was not sure I was going survive the night. She kept herself in her mansion locked away from my pain. Elain, however, visited me often.
Usually with a new set of flowers. We share the same love for gardening. I often would find myself in their garden when I could not sleep. Neither sister has ever mentioned the intrusion into their home, but I would sometimes find myself held in Elain's arms in between the rose bushes.
The smell of roses never failed to calm my nervous heart.
"Feyre came to visit last month." Elain whispered, "She seemed so happy with her new family. However, I wished she would come back, so we could be a complete set again."
I stayed quiet as she shared her worries.
"Do you remember Feyre?" she asks.
I shake my head. "Elain, I don't remember anything before that night I was dropped off in this village."
"I figured I would ask. She asked about an Annalise when she was here. I didn't even remember who she was talking about. There has never been an Annalise in this village. She looked so sad when I told her that." Elain elaborates.
I couldn't get the feeling of familiarity of that name out of my head. Annalise.
"Is your sister coming back?" I ask.
Elain seems to hesitate before saying "She is supposed to come back this week." She spoke as if she was sharing a secret I was not supposed to know.
We sat in silence for a while before Elain got up and left me alone with a simple goodbye.
As I sat in the cold darkness I wished I could see the stars again.
With a sigh, I stood up and went inside to try to go to sleep. As I lay in bed tossing and turning I keep thinking about that name. Annalise. I wish I could remember where I have heard it before.
After what seemed like hours I got up and pulled on the coat that Elain gave me last time she visited. She said it was out of style, but I knew she could see me shivering in the winter wind.
I walked back outside and started to sit back on the steps. While I ran my hands along the steps to sit on the top step I feel a cool piece of metal. I pick it up and trace my hands along the smooth grooves.
I know instantly what it is. Elain showed me her engagement ring last week. It must have fallen off of her hand when she came to visit me.
I picked it up and became my journey towards the smell of roses. I hope Elain doesn't mind the late-night visit. She has not stopped talking about her engagement since it was announced.
On my way towards the house, I feel a familiar sense of dread. When have I felt like this before?
I can't place the feeling, but quickly brush it off. As I push the gate surrounding the house open I hear the chilling sound of Elain screaming.
I start to sprint towards the sound. My hands are outstretched and I desperately try to navigate the darkness.
Elain's voice is getting closer and right before I could reach her I felt around wrap around my body and rough arms slam me to the ground.
"What do we have here? I thought there were only two Archeron siblings." A deep voice asked.
I desperately try to figure out what is going on. Elain is screaming to let her go. Nesta is begging for them to leave Elain alone.
The rough hands grip my face. "She doesn't look as pretty as the other ones. Who are you?"
Before I have time to respond Nesta says the only thing she can think of is to save her sister.
"She is Elain Archeron. My sister. Please let the servant go. She has done nothing."
I gasp. What is she doing? Why is she lying?
The man grunts and says "Well until we figure this out you are all coming with us."
His rough arms tighten around me and I am punched in the face repeatedly until I blackout.