Chapter Two
Ryan, Liam and Liv were putting up decorations with a huge banner reading 'Happy 6th Birthday Skye'. The room was covered in pastel shades pink, purple and blue.
"I cannot believe Skye Bow is 6" said Liv
"I know, it feels like only yesterday I was in labour" Ryan reminisced a little sad her baby was growing up.
"How weird it is that we didn't even know each other then? I can't even begin to imagine you pregnant" said Liv
Ryan remembered exactly what it was like, she remembered finding out, she remembered telling Sean, she remembered how awful she felt with morning sickness and heartburn.
6 AND A HALF YEARS EARLIER
Ryan was sat on the couch staring at a positive pregnancy test perched on the edge of the coffee table. There was a baby inside her, she had a little human growing inside of her. She wasn't sure if she was excited or terrified. They hadn't planned on getting pregnant and she had no idea how Sean was going to react. How was she even going to break this to him? What if he wasn't happy about it? After Sean's outburst a few months prior things were ok, he had his good days and his bad days. He hadn't lost it like he had that particular day but sometimes he got mad at Ryan, she just tried to stay out of his way until he calmed down. She heard Sean's car pull up began to panic. As the door opened she bottled it and decided she wasn't ready to tell him and quickly picked the pregnancy test up to hide it. Sean walked into the room, had he seen?
"Hey beautiful"
"Hey" she replied with a smile
"What have you got there?" He'd noticed she thought "What are you hiding?" asked Sean she could see his persona change, he was getting impatient and angry. "Ryan!" Ryan nervously held out the test. "Is that a pregnancy test?" he asked reaching out for it. He looked down at it and then back at her "You're pregnant?" he asked, she nodded. She couldn't read him, was he happy, sad, angry? He stared at the test as Ryan waited eagerly and nervously wanting to know what he thought. She saw a smile creep on his face. "I'm going to be a Daddy!" he exclaimed. Ryan's entire body relaxed, he wasn't mad, she was relieved. Sean approached her and stroked her face "Aren't you excited?" he asked wondering why she wasn't reacting.
"Err…yeah…I'm just a little shocked, I think. I found out like ten minutes ago"
"Ry, this a good thing. A little baby that's half you and half me…that kids going to rule the world" he said with a giant smile on his face before pulling Ryan in and squeezing her tight.
6 Months Later
An exhausted Ryan tried to catch her breath while an overwhelmed Sean kissed her on the head. The room was filled with screams from their newborn baby who was being checked over by the staff.
"Is she ok?" asked Sean
A nurse then made her way over to Ryan and placed a small 6lb bundle of joy into her arms. Ryan immediately fell in love with her. Sean sat down on the bed next to her and they both stared at the baby. Sean kissed Ryan again he was so grateful to her for giving him this beautiful gift.
"She's real" said Sean as reality hit "We have to keep her alive?" he started to panic "Oh my God, we are not ready for this" he stood up and began to freak out a little. He then turned back to Ryan who hadn't broken her gaze on their daughter, she was calm and serene. Sean saw how natural it looked to her; she was meant to be a mum. Suddenly he felt calm, he knew they would be ok as parents because where he failed at it, he knew Ryan would thrive because she was the most amazing person he'd ever met. He sat back down next to her and put his hand on hers as she rested it on the baby. They were both captivated by their little girl.
"Does this little one have a name?" asked the nurse
They looked at each other and realised they never agreed on a name for her.
"We haven't figured that one out yet" replied Sean
"Ok well we will name her Baby Girl McKenzie until then"
"Slater" interrupted Ryan "Baby Girl Slater" she said looking at the nurse. Sean smiled and kissed Ryan's head, he couldn't remember a time when he'd ever felt that happy.
"Ok" replied the nurse leaving the little family unit together in the room.
"Baby girl Slater has a ring to it" said Sean jokingly, or at least Ryan hoped it was jokingly
"We're not naming her Baby Girl" insisted Ryan
Sean chuckled "Ok, ok what about Mildred?"
She looked at Sean and smiled at him, even at the birth of their daughter he managed to be a goof and she still loved him for it.
PRESENT DAY
"I mean Skye is a pretty name but I would go for something more…"
"Pretentious?" said Liam finishing her sentence for her
"Traditional. I love Skye but what are the chances that Skye Slater will be a lawyer or a supreme court judge. They're your Elizabeth's, Charlotte's, Emma's"
Ryan looked over at Liam who had this dumbfounded look on his face, like he couldn't believe the words coming out of Liv's mouth.
"Her name doesn't dictate the career path she chooses. My girl can be anything she wants to be" said Ryan proudly
"Is there a story behind her name?" asked Liam
She smirked "We couldn't decide on one. So, we each picked our top three, put them in a bowl and pulled out the winner"
"Who picked Skye?" asked Liv
"He did"
"What did you want to call her?"
"Rose after my grandmother, that's why she is named Skyler Rose"
"And where exactly did Bow come from?" asked Liv. Ryan didn't want to go down that path, she wanted to celebrate her daughter's birthday and although not a bad story she didn't want memories of Sean to take over and ruin the day.
"A story for another time, come on let's get this done so we can go collect the birthday girl from school" she said excitedly
LATER AT SKYES SCHOOL
Ryan had arrived to pick up the birthday girl ready for her party. As the crowds thinned out she wondered where Skye was. She watched as the stragglers left and still no Skye. Ryan spotted Skye's teacher and approached her.
"Excuse me" the teacher turned to face her.
"Miss McKenzie how can I help you?" she asked politely
"Is Skye still inside?"
"Err…she definitely came out with the class"
"Well she's not here" stated Ryan beginning to panic "Can you please go check to see if she went back inside?"
"Of course"
While she waited for the teacher to return Ryan walked across the playground screaming Skye's name to see if she was hiding or playing a game with her but she got no reply. The teacher emerged from the school.
"She's definitely not in there"
Ryan's heart sunk and panic took over "Then where is my daughter?!"
ELSEWHERE AT A CAFÉ
A waitress arrived at the table and placed down an ice cream sundae in front of a very excited Skye. The waitress left the table.
"Thank you" said Skye
"It's ok sweetie, I had to get my baby girl a treat for her birthday" said Sean who sat across from his daughter watching her with a huge smile on his face. Skye was only two the last time he saw her. "Is it delicious? It looks delicious" Skye held out a spoonful of sundae offering it to Sean. "Oh, thank you" he said taking a bite "Wow, that's really yummy"
"Where's my mummy?" asked Skye
"You're Mummy is busy setting up a big birthday surprise for you"
"How do you know my Mummy?"
Sean looked at her a little confused "Do you know who I am?" he asked her. Skye shook her head. "I'm your Daddy"
"I have a daddy?" she asked
"Everybody has a daddy" he answered enthusiastically "Has your mummy never told you about me?" Skye shook her head "No, I can understand why" he said a little upset she didn't know him.
"Why?" asked Skye
Sean caught a little off guard by this inquisitive little girl "Err well if Mummy had told you things about me, you'd have asked where I was right?" she nodded "It would have been hard for Mummy to answer that because it was secret" he lied trying to shield Skye from the truth "Even Mummy didn't know but I'm back now and I would really like to be your Daddy again. Is that ok with you?" she nodded "Ok Bow, this sundae is too big for one little girl how about we share?"
"My Mummy calls me Bow but my name is Skye"
Sean smirked as he listened to her "Do you know why you're called Bow?"
"After the rainbows"
"That's right, because rainbows mean hope and when you were a teeny tiny baby" he said moving his fingers closer together until there was a half inch gap left.
"I was bigger than that!" she said giddily
"Just a little bit" he said adjusting his fingers slightly. Skye climbed on the seat reached over the table and moved Sean's hands apart.
"Oh ok" said Sean going along with it
"I was that big" she insisted. Sean chuckled.
"Ok when you were this big, we made a list of hopes and dreams for you, that's where you got the nickname Bow from" he explained
"I hope you're strong, I hope you're brave, I hope you don't live in a cave. I hope you smile; I hope you laugh; I hope you don't grow as big as a giraffe" Sean smiled as Skye recited their hopes and dreams that they'd made when she was a few days old. "Giraffes are really big, they're bigger than a car"
"They are bigger than a car, some are even bigger than trees" added Sean
"And buildings" Skye added excitedly. Sean was in love with this little girl. He loved how much she reminded him of Ryan. He could see himself in her, the eyes, the dimples, the freckles but that spirit she had was definitely all Ryan.
BACK AT RYANS HOUSE
Ryan was frantic, she didn't know where her daughter was. She'd called everyone she could think of, they'd checked everywhere she could think of.
"Miss McKenzie…" said a police officer. Ryan looked at him, she knew he wanted a response but she had no idea what the question was as she couldn't concentrate on anything, she just wanted her child back.
"Why are you here?" Ryan asked the officer sternly "If my daughter was here, she wouldn't be missing. You need to be out there looking for her!" screamed Ryan.
"Sorry officer maybe just give us a minute" suggested Liv stepping in. The officer obliged and stepped away leaving the two women alone.
"Where could she have gone?" Ryan asked Liv for maybe the thousandth time "She knows not to walk off unless there's a grown up there to collect her. I need my baby back Liv"
Ryan began to feel claustrophobic in the house surrounded by people, most of them who couldn't have given a damn about her and Skye they were just being 'Helpful' so they could be nosey. Ryan pushed her way through the crowd and burst out of the house onto the front garden. She sat on her steps and put her head between her legs trying to calm herself.
"Mummy!" shouted Skye running in Ryan's direction. She looked up and immediately ran to her daughter and scooped her up.
"Oh my God Skye. You're safe, thank god. Thank god" she said repeating herself squeezing Skye so tight there was no chance she'd ever get away again. A crowd grew outside the house all thankful Skye was home. Ryan let Skye go and looked at her "Where were you?"
"With my Daddy, look what he got me" she said waving a mermaid doll at Ryan. Ryan was overwhelmed by a feeling of shock and fear. Was Skye telling the truth? Was she with her Daddy? Was Sean back? Where was he? Was he there now watching them? Ryan picked Skye up in her arms and ran inside, Liv running after her.
Sean was parked down the street out of sight of them but in perfect view to make sure Skye got home safely. He started the engine on his car and he drove away.
Back inside Ryan's house. Ryan was checking Skye over to make sure she was ok, which she seemed to be.
"Bow, you said you were with your Daddy?"
"Yep we had ice cream"
"That's nice" she said trying not to scare Skye "Did he pick you up from school?" she nodded "You know you shouldn't leave school with anybody you don't know right?" she nodded
"Can I see my Daddy again? He's silly" she said with a huge smile on her face, clearly she'd enjoyed her time with him. Skye was completely oblivious to what had been happening back home and Ryan didn't want to upset her.
"We'll see" replied Ryan not wanting to upset her child.
At that moment Liam ran into the room "She's back?" he saw her sat on the chair before he could start reacting frantically Ryan took him to one side.
"She's ok" said Ryan assuring him.
"Where was she?" he asked
"With her dad apparently" answered Liv
"Her dad?" Liam was as confused as Ryan. He thought the same as Ryan that Sean was still in prison. "He's out?" he asked confirming it.
"Apparently" replied Ryan
"What the hell was he thinking?" asked an infuriated Liam.
"Miss McKenzie…" began the officer as he approached them "…I have sent everybody home"
"Thank you"
"Do you want EMTs to check Skye over?"
"No, I've checked, she's fine. I don't want her wondering why people are checking her. As far as she's concerned, she just went to have ice cream with her Daddy"
"Does her father have rights?"
"Her fathers meant to be in prison. I have full custody of her. Can you explain to me how he can be out of prison and no one thought to tell me?"
"Did the crime he was sentenced for involve yourself? Were you the victim?"
"No"
"Then there's no obligation for anyone to inform you I'm afraid"
"That's bullshit!" exclaimed Liam "He's dangerous"
"I can't comment on that sir" said the officer not aware of the situation
Ryan looked over at Skye who was playing with her new toy from her Dad.
"I'd like to celebrate my daughter's birthday so I'd appreciate if you left now. Thank you for your help" she said walking away from the officer and over to Skye "Hey you, you haven't seen the living room, have you?" she said taking Skye out of the room to her party they'd set up before this nightmare ensued.
LATER THAT NIGHT
They had celebrated Skye's birthday, they'd played games, smashed the pinata, eaten cake, opened gifts and danced all around. Skye had the best time but the sugar crash had hit and Ryan placed a sleeping Skye into her bed. She sat down beside her and stroked her hair; she couldn't believe the events that had unfolded that day. What if he'd decided not to bring her home? What if she'd never seen Skye again? Ryan shook it off, she didn't even want to think about that possibility. She kissed Skye softly. "Happy Birthday Bow" she whispered.
She collected Skye's dirty clothes as she vacated the room, she began to check the pockets ready to throw them in the hamper. She pulled out the contents of her coat to find a photo. She looked and saw it was a photograph of them; her, Skye and Sean. She remembered the day it had been taken. They'd been living in this perfect baby bubble where it was just the three of them, she remembered how happy she felt at that time. The photo was of them huddled up with newborn Skye between them. How did they go from that, to this?
"Are you ok?" asked Liam
"I don't know" she answered honestly
Liam moved in and hugged Ryan, holding her as tight as he could. She welcomed it, its what she'd needed all afternoon, everyone had been treating her like glass but this was what she needed and she was thankful for Liam more than ever at that point.
THE NEXT DAY
The mornings were frantic as always but today even more so, Ryan was terrified to send Skye to school, she was terrified it would all happen again. They'd put provisions in place with the school and she knew Skye would be fine though she couldn't help but panic. She got down to Skye's level and smiled at her "You be a good girl for Liam and stay close to him ok and remember you only leave the school with Mummy, Liam or Aunt Livvy ok?"
"Ok Mummy" Ryan kissed her and sent her on her with Liam who was doing the school run that day.
"Bye baby" said Liam kissing Ryan before they left the house for the day.
Ryan cleared the table as she was loading them in the dishwasher, she heard the front door.
"What have you forgot this time?" she asked turning to greet a very forgetful Liam but she was surprised to find it wasn't Liam but Sean stood in front of her.
"Hey beautiful" he said
Ryan was frozen to the spot, she looked at him, she couldn't help but, she even questioned whether this was real or whether she was so stressed over everything she was imagining this. He was exactly as she remembered him, his hair a little longer, his frame a little larger, he'd clear taken care of himself physically whilst he was away. She wanted to speak but she couldn't, she wanted to move but her body wouldn't let her.
Sean approached her standing a foots width between them, he looked down at her he couldn't believe he was this close to her again. He'd obviously seen her from a distance and knew she was as beautiful as ever if not more so but to be near her was the best feeling. The silent motionless moment between them came to an abrupt end when Ryan began to hit him, repeatedly in the chest all the while screaming at him.
"What the hell were you thinking? She's just a little girl. Do you know how worried I was?"
Sean stood there and took the hits, he let her vent her frustrations, she was right to be angry and he deserved it. Ryan stopped herself and turned away from him, she didn't want to see him anymore because the mere sight of him made her furious.
"I'm sorry" he apologised and watched as Ryan turned back to him, he could see she was pissed.
"You're sorry?" she asked angrily
"Yeah I am, I know what I did was wrong but I just wanted to see my daughter on her birthday"
"You kidnapped her!" exclaimed Ryan
"Kidnapped? She's my daughter how is that kidnap?"
"You went to her school, took her without my permission, I didn't know who she was with, where she was, if she was safe…"
"Of course she was safe, I would never hurt Bow"
"I didn't know who she was with! In the moment how did I know she was ok?" screamed Ryan
"Ry, I've apologised. In hindsight I should probably have approached it in a different way"
"You think?"
"Ry, if I'd have come to you the day I was released and asked to see my child, you wouldn't have let me because the last time you saw me I was…" he hesitated trying to play it down "…in a pretty bad state"
She remembered! She will never be able to forget that moment.
4 AND HALF YEARS EARLIER
Ryan was running herself in circles trying to hold down everything at home. Skye who was around 18 months old at the time was screaming in the background having a full-blown tantrum because Ryan had dared to tell her it was bedtime. Ryan was trying to cook dinner ready for Sean arriving home, she had to clean up Skye's toys which were all over the floor and every time she attempted to put them away Skye had taken them back out the toy box, the kitchen looked like a bomb had gone off, she was cradling an arm full of dirty laundry that she'd collected on her way, she knew she would then have to wrestled an overly tired Skye to her bed. Today was one of those days where she just didn't seem to be able to win at anything and she was on the verge of just giving up on it all and letting it win. Just then the front door opened and Sean walked in, he caught a glimpse of the chaos wondering to himself what had happened here. He turned his attention to a crying Skye and wondered why Ryan wasn't checking on her.
"Why is she crying?" he asked Ryan
"Because I told her she had to go to bed, so of course I am the worst mum in world for making her sleep" she snapped as she checked on the pots on the stove to make sure nothing was burning before moving on to her next job.
Sean picked Skye up and tried to soothe her, Skye loved her Daddy probably because he acted like a big kid himself but he always managed to calm her. Ryan continued to do her endless tasks while Sean held Skye and although thankful, he'd got her to stop crying she also resented him a little that he 'could' stop her because she'd failed for the last 45 minutes. What was it about him?
"What have you been doing all day?" asked Sean in an accusatory tone almost criticising her efforts.
With that condescending comment an already angry Ryan shot him a look ready to finally blow her lid on him when she saw Sean's face was covered in blood.
"Oh my god what happened?" she said walking over to him and touching his face. He pulled away.
"Nothing!" he replied putting Skye back down in her playpen and handing her, her favourite toy and comforter.
"That's not nothing Sean"
"Just leave it alone will you" he said walking by her and retrieving a beer from the fridge. He looked at the pots on the stove. "You're burning this shit" he said aggressively before sitting down at the kitchen table and drinking his beer. Ryan tended to the pots on the stove and turned off all the rings, she retrieved the first aid kit from the cabinet and sat down with Sean, she opened the kit. "I said leave it alone" screamed Sean just wanting her to stop fussing but Ryan was concerned as it looked like a deep cut on his face.
"Sean, I think you need stitches. I'll clean it up and we'll see if you need to go to the hospital ok?" she said getting out the supplies she needed. Sean watched her doing this and grew angrier that she wasn't listening to him, he didn't want her help, he just wanted to be left alone but she was carrying on. Sean reacted and he stood up and flipped the table over in rage. The loud noise scaring Skye, causing her to cry again.
"I said leave it!" he screamed at her. She was still sat on the chair and he leaned in and got in her face so close he pressed his face against hers, his blood smearing onto her skin. "Are you an idiot? Do you not understand English? I told you to leave it alone now FOR ONCE RYAN" he screamed "Do as you are fucking told"
They were interrupted by a knock at the door. Sean looked over in the direction and could see through the glass blue lights flashing.
"Did you do that?" he asked "Did you call the fucking cops?!" he screamed in her face
"No" she insisted "I've been with you the whole time" she said pleading her case
Sean went over to the door, as soon as he moved away Ryan jumped up and picked up a crying Skye. Sean opened the door to see two police officers before him.
"Officers what can we do for you?" he asked sarcastically as he actually couldn't have cared less about their presence at his home.
"Are you Sean Slater?" one officer asked
"That's what my driving license says" he joked
"Can you step outside please" Sean stepped outside still not sure why they were there, if Ryan hadn't called them then who did? "Sean Slater we are arresting you on suspicion of manslaughter" The officers proceeded to put handcuffs on Sean.
"Manslaughter?" asked Sean confused by the arrest
Ryan ran over to the door and watched on in disbelief.
The officers continued "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney, and if you cannot afford one, one will be provided for you"
"You've got the wrong guy fellas" he insisted as he was moved in the direction of squad car
"Wait officer, what's happening?" asked Ryan
"Who are you ma'am?" asked the officer
"I'm his partner, the mother of his child" she said with Skye still in her arms.
"Miss, it appears Mr Slater has been involved in a physical altercation tonight that has resulted in a fatality. That is as much detail as I can go into at this time" he said before walking away
Ryan stood motionless and stunned by what was happening right before her eyes. This couldn't be right? Yeah Sean was hot headed but he wouldn't do this? He couldn't. Could he?
PRESENT DAY
Ryan came back to the room after remembering that night. She looked at the man before her and wondered whether it was the same man from that night.
"I'm not that guy anymore" he continued but this was the same line she'd heard before, that she'd believed before. Every time he screwed up, he would apologise and promise it was the last time and he would change but he never did and she suspected he still hadn't "I got help while I was inside. I got counselling, I did anger management, I was put on a course for …" he hesitated ashamed he was admitting it "for domestic violence. I know what I did to you, now I know why I did that to you. I've worked really hard to change Ry. Now I just need the chance to prove that I have"
"And you thought what you did yesterday was the best way do that?" she asked
"I will keep apologising for what I put you through yesterday but I will not apologise for why I did it. I wanted…to meet, my daughter. The last time I saw her she was so small and now she's like a real little person and she's funny, smart, sassy as hell and my god is she beautiful" he replied gushing over Skye, Ryan was pissed at him but to see how much he clearly loved Skye warmed her heart. He had been a good dad, Skye idolised him. He had flaws, more than most people but not being a loving and attentive dad wasn't one of them. "It's a good job she takes after me really" he said jokingly trying to break the ice with Ryan. She smirked and shook her head, that was the Sean she remembered, who she fell in love with. That charmingly arrogant side of him. "Please let me be a part of my daughter's life" he begged.
Ryan didn't know how to respond; she didn't want to stop him being in her life but how could she be sure that he'd changed? She didn't want to put her trust in him as she had done so many times before to only find out when its too late, when Skye has formed a bond with him that he is the same Sean, because 'that' Sean is not safe to be around Skye and her first priority is always Skye's safety.