Fall had gone by rather uneventfully. There was a bit of a change in their usual routine, as Petra soon traded flower picking for mushroom gathering, much to Levi's misery.

"I'm not putting that shit in my mouth."

Petra laughed as she pushed the mushroom further in his face, earning one of his infamous nose scrunches. He was adorable when he was acting so stubborn. Petra had been doing this all her life and had never made someone ill with the ones she chose. Her father had taught her well enough.

"I would never poison you, Levi."

He was not usually one to refuse food since he knew first-hand the effects of its scarcity, but mushrooms had always been a no-go for him. As delicious as people claimed they were, Levi could never carelessly eat something that could kill you so simply.

"Not on purpose, at least," she whispered between giggles.

Levi rolled away from her, not paying any mind to her protests to return. The ones she got out between the laughing fits, that was.

"You're on your own if a bear comes," he yelled as he put more distance between them.

"Wait, there are bears in these forests?" He could sense the terror in her voice as she ran up by his side. Not that he could do much to help if a bear did actually come. But truthfully, he knew nothing about it, but she deserved it for mocking his fear of mushrooms.

"Maybe you could just stare at the bear until it goes away. I'm sure it'll be frightened."

"Stop acting like a brat," he warned her as he led her to a place where he had spotted more of those devils.

He had also gotten the chance to meet Petra's son and her two daughters. Her daughters were excited to put a face on the man from the many stories their mother had shared, asking Levi dozens of questions, both about his time spent as Humanity's Strongest Soldier and regarding his personal affairs. But her son had mostly been watching him in silence, approaching him with wariness. An unspoken question of what are your intentions regarding my mother. Levi could appreciate his need to protect his mother, so he tried his best to reassure her children he would never hurt Petra.

"They are something, aren't they?" she whispered after the children took their leave. She had been nervous about them meeting Levi, but after hearing he had come back into her life, they had kept insisting on it. She believed it was partly about them making sure Levi would not hurt her.

"They're good kids. They love you a lot."

It made his heart swell with pride at seeing how good of a mother Petra was. Levi had never considered parenthood, and while it was a bit late for it now, he wondered what type of father he would have been. If his children would resemble his mother or be unlucky enough to take after him. But dwelling on the past and what could have been would do him no good now.

Time spent by her side was bliss, and as December was approaching sooner than he would have expected, the matter of finding her the perfect birthday gift had become rather an urgency. He couldn't afford to half-ass it, not after being away for so long. Back in their military days, his usual, practical go-to gift had always been excellent quality cleaning supplies, but Levi had a hunch that would not do for this occasion. Seeing as Petra was his sole companion for trips into town, finding the opportunity to go unnoticed by her was a challenge in itself. His wallet felt lighter in his jacket after dealing with the bribe for the janitor to distract Petra and what he thought to be a rather suitable gift. But as Levi had always been an unlucky bastard, the janitor did a shit job, and the first person to greet him back to the house was the birthday girl herself. He could barely get a word out before Petra ran up to him with genuine hurt on her face.

"You went to town without me!"

As Levi felt no need to address the obvious that he had indeed gone into town without her, Petra went on with her inquiries. She could not believe he had not asked her to join. It so happened she badly needed a dress for her upcoming birthday.

"Who did you go with?"

"You're not my only friend," said Levi as he shrugged. An appropriate, innocent gesture in his eyes that only made Petra nosier.

"Please, like any of us could believe that. Was it a date?"

Petra was not in any way jealous if he had met someone. Levi was a free man, after all. He had made no promises to her nor shown any actual interest in her after they had reunited. A few compliments here and there, yes, but nothing serious. But the hope was still there, and she was nervous to hear his answer.

"Tsk, as if."

Her question irked him. As if he would ever have eyes for another woman. He had tried his best to flirt with her, but it seemed to have all been in vain. As usual, Gabi was right. His experience with women was shit.

"What's in the bag then?"

"Laxatives."

While she usually enjoyed his unusual sense of humor that seemed to rely predominantly on toilet jokes, Petra was far too intrigued about the trip he had insisted on taking on his own. A smirk appeared on her lips as she put the pieces together.

"Is it a birthday gift for me?"

"No, I just need to shit."

Levi tried to make his way back into the house as Petra kept whining in his ear that she hated being surprised.

"Got you those laxatives from the apothecary."

Levi dropped the pale pink box on her lap and went to sit by the fireplace. He was pleased to see the curiosity and enthusiasm on her face as she hurriedly started unwrapping the pink ribbons he had spent more time on than he would ever admit to her. But to see her smile, he would wrap himself up in pink ribbons if it did the job.

Petra gasped in surprise at his choice of a gift. She would have expected a perfume or a pretty dress, definitely not something about a passion she had never shared with him.

"Levi, how did you know?"

He always thought it a shame that Petra had let no one see her work. She must have thought she was discreet, but Levi would always notice her doodling under the oak tree in the back of the training grounds. He had never dared to disturb her, being content with just watching her work.

"Happy birthday, brat."

Petra hugged the notebook to her chest, touched by his kind gesture. It had been years since she had picked up a crayon or a brush in her hand. Her encounter with the Female Titan had left her with a tremor that took countless hours of therapy to remedy. And after it, Petra had found excuse after excuse until her passion for drawing became a distant memory in her mind.

"It's perfect. Thank you."

"What are you going to draw first?"

But Petra already had the perfect idea in mind even before he thought to ask. She had done this before dozens of times, not that he could ever know it. She had never dared to gift him a drawing.

"Can I draw you?"

Her question surprised Levi. The last thing he wanted was for Petra to focus her attention on his physical appearance. He had been unlucky enough to be unattractive even before Zeke had scarred him.

"Wanna waste your time on an ugly, tired, old man?"

"You're neither of that," she answered without a second thought. Petra had never understood why most people failed to see Levi's beauty. She had never seen a more handsome man in her life. His blue eyes had captivated her from the first moment she had seen him.

"The scars…"

"I actually think they make you more attractive," she interrupted him. "You fought and bled to protect all of us," she stated with a heavy blush on her cheeks. She had always trusted Levi with her life and had no moment of doubt when it came to him, but she had always been too timid to show him just how far her devotion went.

Levi nodded in approval, and when he got back to his room at the end of the night, he found the portrait on his nightstand, next to a cup of his favorite tea.

While he would have preferred a quiet day spent by her side, Petra had insisted his birthday could not go by uncelebrated. After waking up to Petra bringing him breakfast in bed, a habit he would never repeat and taking his time to change his bedsheets in fear of crumbs, he and Petra had made their way into town, where she had arranged a tea tasting session at the local shop. The most thoughtful gift someone had ever given him, and Levi let Petra know how much he enjoyed it. With a bag full of tea leaves on his lap, they had taken a longer route home, allowing Petra to spot an untouched portion of snow, perfect for creating Levi's first snowman. Petra had made sure to give him only one coal eye to make it resemble its creator.

Levi was grateful for all the time he spent by her side and the happiness she was bringing into his life, but the guilt was still there, nagging at him each time he was alone with his thoughts. It was only a matter of time before Petra would address it.

He knew something was wrong the minute he got into the room and noticed Petra staring empty-minded at the fireplace with a drink in her hand. Levi could tell she had been crying, and he wondered if it was anything he did or if New Year's Eve carried sad memories for her. He sat next to her in silence, waiting for her to reach out to him.

"You never looked for me."

The conversation he had hoped to avoid for as long as possible, if not at all. The shame and guilt would haunt him for the rest of his life, but he knew he had no good answers to her questions.

"I'm sorry," he whispered without daring to look her in the eye.

"Are you?"

He was not proud of how he had acted, but he would have been no good to her. Of that, he was sure. He had nothing to give her, not even empty promises. Only pain.

"I needed you. I waited for you for weeks, months, even years." By then, the tears had run down her cheeks. "He must be busy with the war I had said to comfort myself. But then the war ended, and no letter came."

He answered her questions with nothing but silence, so she went on.

"I love my family with all my heart, but no matter what, you were still on my mind. As each year passed, my thoughts would go to you, wondering how you're doing, if you ever think of me at all."

Levi tried taking her hand in his, but she pushed it away. Her rejection had hurt more than he would have thought possible.

"I never forgot you. But I knew you were happy, Petra. Look at how you've flourished without me."

He had been too ashamed to face her after she had recovered from her injuries. He had nothing to offer her, no comfort. He had even failed in bringing their killer to justice. Months passed, and the Survey Corps needed him for mission after mission, and by the time he had finally gathered the courage to face her, he had heard of her engagement. It had hurt him to lose her forever, but he would have done anything for her happiness. Even staying out of her life.

"You deserved to forget all the pain, Petra. You deserved to forget me."

"That wasn't your choice to make."

Levi knew she was right, but he would have always chosen his mission over her. He had done it, and it had killed her friends and almost claimed her life. And Petra deserved someone who could put her first.

"Do you care for me, Levi?"

"You know I do," he answered without hesitation. He had always cared for her, and he would do until his last moment, even if she would tell him to stay away from her.

"Do you love me, then?"

Yes. There was no other answer, yet Levi only met her question with silence.

"I'll see you around," she said as she left the room without giving him another glimpse.

A few weeks went by and Petra had done her best to avoid him at any cost. He never spotted her in the common rooms or the mess hall anymore, and each time he got in front of her door, he would back away from knocking at the last second and leave her be. He would respect her choice to stay out of her life if that was what she desired. But getting a glimpse of what happiness felt like and losing it so soon was more painful than not knowing how life by her side would have been. He had lost his chance at sharing his life with her years ago and it was time to accept it.

Just as he had lost all hope, Petra shyly approached his table at lunch one day, asking if she could join him. Levi eagerly nodded but made no attempts to start a conversation with her, anxious of pushing her away again. After a few long minutes of silence, Petra cleared her voice and started discussing the weather with him. It took only a few lines for that conversation to dry up, and the tension between them felt even heavier than before.

"Valentine's Day is coming. A bit of a silly tradition, I know, but the people here love a good party."

He had not considered Petra would be interested in something like this, but then again, she had always been a hopeless romantic. He had heard of how excited she used to be for the stupid parties Erwin used to throw every year to boost morale, but he never attended them. He would always have to hear the weeks of teasing Petra would receive from the guys on his squad, as apparently, she was always the star of the night.

"Maybe I'll save you a dance," she said with a sad smile before she left the table.

The party was a success so far, as everyone had shown their gratitude for her sweet gesture and had been kind enough to compliment her organizational skills. Petra had to admit it was one of her best works yet. She had made the flower arrangements herself and had hired one band currently in vogue. Despite all that, she had a hard time enjoying her triumph. One person was missing, the only one that mattered in the end. Her heart felt heavy ever since they had become distant from one another. She regretted her actions, but at the same time, she felt free; he finally knew how she truly felt. It had been far too long, and his sudden reappearance in her life had only made it worse. But as Eld has so wisely taught her, there was no broken heart alcohol could not mend. As she was about to refill her glass, someone from the staff approached her.

"We have a situation in the gardens. Could you go check it out?"

At least it would take my mind off him. Petra accepted without a complaint, thankful for the distraction. The last thing she would have wished for was to spoil everyone's fun with her lack of enthusiasm for this day. While she agreed that love deserved to be celebrated all year round, it was hard not to be enthusiastic about this silly tradition. And her sweet tooth had definitely played a role in this, as no year passed without her receiving what her heart desired most. Chocolate. She could feel herself salivating just by thinking about it, and she made a plan to return to her table as soon as possible. Petra hurried her step as, suddenly, some music seemed to come from the gazebo, and she was certain she had not included the garden in her plans. She cussed her choice to leave the house in nothing but a thin satin dress and high-heeled shoes in the middle of February.

Petra stopped in her track as she made it to the gardens. But she barely had time to react to her surroundings before Levi hurriedly made his way to her. "What were you thinking?" Levi complained as he was already taking off his coat.

"What is this?" She could already feel the tears pool in her eyes. She knew her captain was far from a romantic man. Yet, for her, he had created a scene out of one of her cheesy, romantic novels, the ones she would never admit to reading. Petra followed the lights around the gazebo like a child, momentarily losing sight of why she was there, to begin with. Levi pulled her out of her reveries as he wrapped his coat around her shivering form.

"You know… just thought you deserve this shit," he muttered as he kept his gaze away from her. He hoped Petra would not take notice of the unusual redness of his neck and face.

"Only you could add shit to a romantic declaration and make it work," she laughed as tears ran down her cheeks.

"Doing a shit job if it made you cry."

Petra hurriedly took his hand in hers to reassure him he had nothing to worry about. "These are good tears."

There was something Levi had always wanted to do with her but had never dared ask her. He was sure his clumsiness would have embarrassed her in front of their colleagues. But he had no more time to lose. "I know this is not what you would have imagined… but do you want to dance?"

"I've always wanted to dance with you," she said without a second thought. After Petra had handed him one of his crutches, Levi wrapped his arm around her for support, and they slowly swayed to the music. Levi never wanted the song to end. He wanted to stay in her arms until he took his last breath.

"I'm sorry… I should have…"

"I know, you don't need to say anything," she stopped him before he could get another word out.

"But I…" Petra shut him up using her lips, and after the initial surprise wore off, Levi returned her kiss, deepening it. His first kiss in decades, and it was well worth the wait. She was worth it.

"We lost so much time because of me," he whispered as he put his forehead on hers. He sneaked in a nose kiss that did not fail to make Petra smile.

"We have plenty left," she whispered before she kissed him again.