Chapter Two – Magic Power and Life Power

A normal life, as a small part of the big picture. Isn't that enough for you?

"No, it's not."

You want more?

"Yes."

How much more?

"Until there's nothing left."

...

An abrupt voice snapped Daphne out of her rehearsed ritual. "Talking to yourself again, Greengrass?"

Daphne clicked her tongue. What torture not to have a room to herself since summer. She rose from the table and her mirror in which she had been looking at herself, grabbed her bag, and turned to face her roommates.

Pansy once again gave her her typical look that tempted Daphne every time to make her the subject of her next experiment. Behind Pansy were Millicent and Tracey, Pansy's two lapdogs. Millicent and Pansy had known each other their entire lives, and Tracey, as a half-blood, had quickly learned who she had to kiss the feet of to survive in Slytherin. Daphne had nothing but contempt for such an attitude.

Without giving them another glance, she walked past the three girls.

"Where are you going?" asked Pansy.

"None of your business," said Daphne in a sing-song tone.

"You watch yourself, Greengrass, before –"

Daphne made a motion with her wand, causing the heavy wooden door to their dormitory to fall shut behind her. She could hear her roommates calling and knocking, but they would never manage to open the door again without help, pathetic witches as they were.

Daphne's legs carried her down to the almost deserted common room. This was not only due to the late hour, most of the Slytherins had also gone home for the Christmas holidays. Much to Daphne's regret, however, this did not apply to all of them.

Well, there was no point in moping around, as tempting as the idea was. But there were more exciting things to experience on this post-Christmas night. Much, much more exciting things.

Her encounter with Potter, Harry, the night before had taken her by surprise. She had no trouble admitting that to herself. The boy amazed her. The boy who had taken down the most powerful Dark Lord in history, and yet acted like a Muggle-born. Even though he admittedly learned the spells in class extremely quickly. Without a doubt, despite his obvious lack of education, he was one of the best with a wand in their year – far better than most of their conceited classmates from oh-so-exalted pureblood families. In addition, he was the youngest Quidditch player in at least a century and had – if the rumours were to be believed – defeated a troll on Halloween. And now she had also learned that he had an Invisibility Cloak.

He could certainly be useful to her...

These thoughts ran through Daphne's mind as she strode through the common room, her heels clicking loudly on the stone floor. One or two heads looked up, but Daphne ignored them too.

Through the portal, she stepped out into the dungeon. She rounded three more corners before, hidden in the darkness of a corridor shrouded in shadow, she transformed into her crow form. And from one moment to the next, Daphne's entire world changed, as if by a sudden eclipse on a far too sunny day.

Full of delight, Daphne pushed herself off the ground, felt the air glide through her feathers, let it carry her and enjoy the complete control that came only from flying herself. Never again would she sit on a broom, such a thing was but a pitiful imitation of much loftier skills.

Daphne's field of vision also changed in her crow form. She saw more clearly, not only light and shadow, but also the magic inherent in the walls of Hogwarts. Ancient, vibrating magic, nourished by countless generations of young witches and wizards who had lived, argued, and laughed here. Add to that the auras of ghosts and house elves who prowled the castle; Daphne gave them a wide berth, as well as two prefects who patrolled the corridors.

Daphne flew through the castle, over paintings, armour, and spider webs. Fortunately, there was no sign of Filch's cat far and wide. Although Daphne always tried to keep an eye on her surroundings, the bloody animal was far too good at suppressing her aura and had already tried to hunt her down several times. How anyone had ever allowed this dangerous creature in a castle full of children was beyond Daphne's comprehension.

Eventually – Daphne was already very close to the library – she noticed another aura. As if from nowhere, it suddenly appeared in the classroom where they had made their agreement the night before. No doubt Harry's miraculous cloak had once again suppressed his aura. Now, however, it shone full of life like a fire in the darkness.

Daphne flew through the open door into the classroom and landed in front of Harry, who was again sitting on the same table as the night before, his Invisibility Cloak in his lap. She didn't waste a second and transformed back into her human form. As every time, a feeling of crushing heaviness overcame her, as if an invisible hand was trying to bring her to her knees. Daphne arched her back and turned her gaze to Harry.

He grinned at her. "This is still as awesome as the first time. And I only noticed now that you have the same eyes as a crow as you do as a human. They're just as golden and unique."

Daphne couldn't help herself. She returned his grin.

"Well then, welcome to your first lesson, Sir Harry."

"Well then, welcome to your first lesson, Sir Harry."

Harry jumped up, wand in his hand. He couldn't wait to get started. "Okay, let's begin!"

Daphne shook her head. "I told you, the way I've become an Animaga doesn't require a wand. You'd better put it away before you poke your eye out. Or worse, mine."

That's right, she had said that, Harry thought. With slight regret, he put his wand away again. He liked the feel of the wand in his hand and was reluctant to give it up.

"Let's sit down," Daphne said, taking a seat cross-legged on the floor.

Harry did the same. They were about the same height, so they could look each other straight in the eye.

"I promised you I would share my knowledge with you," Daphne continued. "But know that my approach to becoming an Animaga was not the traditional approach that most witches and wizards use. I doubt, for example, that Professor McGonagall chose the same path. I am not yet an expert on the magic behind it either, but it worked for me. What I'm saying is that anything you do after this, you do at your own risk. Do you understand me?"

Harry nodded. "Yes, I think I do."

Daphne gave him a deep look as if she doubted that, but eventually she nodded as well. She brushed her black hair out of her face. "Well, what I used to achieve my transformation was blood magic. What do you know about that, Harry?"

"I don't think I've ever heard or read anything about it..."

"That's what I thought. It's not something you'd read about in school books. Very simply, you could say that blood magic harnesses a different source of power than the normal spells – which are the spells we learn at Hogwarts. These spells use what is called magic power, whereas blood magic uses life power. The two, magic power and life power, are independent of each other. For example, ghosts can exist without life power and only through magic power, whereas with Muggles it is the other way round. But the two powers also influence each other. Thus, by means of blood magic, the life power in beings can be harnessed, be it your own life power or that of other beings. This life power can be transmitted, for example, through pain or blood, hence the name. You can then use this life power for certain spells, especially rituals and the like, or you can use it to strengthen spells created by magic power."

Harry felt a shiver run down his spine. Daphne's words fascinated and shocked him in equal measures. That sensation intensified even more as Daphne continued.

"When using pain, the distinction between your own pain and someone else's is very important. Your own pain can only really be used efficiently if you know the currents of magic in your own body. Starting from your heart, along the bloodstream throughout your body."

"Magic starts in the heart?" asked Harry. "But where does the magic come from there?"

"That is one of the old questions of magic to which we will probably never know a definitive answer. But most these days suspect that magic comes from the Spirit Within, our soul, or whatever you want to call it."

"Soul?"

"Yes. And that is also the link to your Animagus transformation. A person's Animagus form is an expression of their Spirit Within. Therefore, in order to find your Animagus form and later be able to willingly transform into it, it is necessary to understand your Spirit Within. There are a variety of ways to do this – meditations, potions, rituals – but the one I have used is the same as harnessing your own pain for spells."

"And what about someone else's pain?"

Daphne shook her head slightly. "Not helpful in finding it. Besides, pain from someone else is a double-edged sword. It is both easier and more difficult to use the life power thus released. Easier because, at least for most people, the pain of others is easier to bear than your own. More difficult because you need a channel for the pain to yourself. Air can serve as a medium, of course, but that is very inefficient. Efficiency can, however, be increased by certain runes or metals. Or by the flesh of certain magical creatures, but I haven't read that much about that."

Harry felt another shiver run down his spine. Part of him just couldn't shake the feeling that what he was doing was wrong. But another part – the astonished child that Hagrid's revelation had resurrected this summer – was riveted by Daphne's words.

"And you taught yourself all this?" he asked.

"I had plenty of time to read the books in my family's library. And I didn't have a wand to use, so I tried other things." Daphne shrugged her shoulders.

He hadn't had a wand either, Harry pondered. Did that mean he could have used magic then, too, had he known all that? The thought made Harry dizzy.

"Is blood magic more powerful than normal magic then?" he asked in a whisper, not knowing why he was whispering. It was the middle of the night and they were both the only living creatures for miles around.

"I wouldn't say that," Daphne said. "In fact, many would disagree. Using magic power is clearly easier and strengthening spells is often not even necessary. Using life power is often much more inefficient, and also forbidden in many manifestations by the Ministry. Moreover, it is very difficult to find the Spirit Within. Only very few make it. Many give up beforehand, because they run the risk of being confronted with the ugly sides of themselves that they may not want to see. In any case, it is a very long and challenging process. For me, however, it has been easy."

Daphne's voice sounded completely serious when she said this. Obviously she didn't mean it as a joke.

"How modest you are," Harry remarked.

Daphne's head snapped around to face him, her eyes sparkling with anger. Her expression, however, relaxed when she noticed his grin. Man, she could be scary.

She clicked her tongue. "Modesty is for idiots. I am proud of what I have achieved. Which doesn't mean I'm satisfied with it, though."

"You want more?"

"Yes."

"How much more?"

Daphne's face hardened. She averted her eyes from him. "I have goals, Potter. And –"

"Harry."

"What?"

"Call me Harry."

Daphne looked at him, and her golden eyes seemed to him deep, like the water of a fountain reflecting the rays of the sun, yet at the same time wild like a raging torrent.

"I have goals in my life, Harry. And for that I study. That's why I've been reading my parents' books since I learned to read. And try out what's in them. Every night I fly to the Restricted Section and try to increase my knowledge. And when I'm not reading, I'm training magic in abandoned classrooms like this one."

"Why?" asked Harry. He leaned forward so as not to miss any of Daphne's words.

"That, Harry, is a knowledge you have not yet earned," Daphne said, dashing his hopes. "I've told you far too much already anyway. Just know this: I will help you find your Animagus form as best I can, since that was our agreement yesterday. I will share with you what I know and we will meet again when you are ready. So it is up to you. I will not slacken in my own efforts just to teach you how to swim."

"I never asked you to!" said Harry a little more impulsively than he had meant to. In a calmer voice, he continued, "I will do my part."

"Good, then let's get started."

With that, Daphne drew her black wand. She pointed it at her hand and a bleeding cut appeared, just as it had the night before. She raised her hand and moved it through the air.

"Do you see my blood, Harry?"

Harry nodded, his heart pounding.

"I can feel it running down my skin. I can feel it oozing out of the wound. I feel it coursing through my veins, from my heart through my entire body. And I feel the magic inside me." Daphne looked to him. "I want you to cut your hand now too. Try to feel your inner magic."

Harry raised his wand and pointed it at his hand. Then he stopped. "Um, how do I do it?"

"What?"

"How do I cut my hand?"

"I forgot. They haven't taught that at Hogwarts yet. Well, I don't have the leisure or time to teach you cutting spells on top of that – but please, please practice this on other objects first before you try it on yourself. I would hate to be responsible for the Boy Who Lived losing his hand. And if I hurt you, it will not have the same effect. Wait."

Daphne rummaged in her bag before pulling out a golden knife, like the ones they used when they ate in the Great Hall.

"Here, take this."

Harry took the knife from her and pointed it at his hand. He was no stranger to violence, but so far it had always been done to him by others – his aunt and uncle, Dudley, Marge's bulldogs, his classmates at primary school. He had never hurt himself before.

He felt Daphne's intense gaze on him and knew he could hesitate no longer. He took one last deep breath before cutting his skin with the knife. Even though he didn't cut deeply, blood instantly oozed from the wound.

Harry closed his eyes and tried to focus entirely on the blood running over his skin. He felt it running down his hand and had to suppress the impulse to wipe it away. He felt the throbbing pain emanating from the wound, unpleasant but far from unbearable. He tried to imagine how the blood flowed through his veins to finally spill out of the wound. He –

"That's enough."

Harry opened his eyes. In front of him sat Daphne, resting her chin on her hands and giving him a bored look.

Harry was irritated by this. "I was about to –"

"No, you weren't," she interrupted him again. "You could have sat here all night and still made no progress whatsoever. Trust me, I went through the same."

Daphne rummaged in her bag again. This time she pulled out a glass vial in which a bluish liquid shimmered. She uncorked the vial and held it over his hand. "May I?"

Harry just grunted.

Daphne then began to pour some of the liquid onto his hand. Where the liquid met his skin it began to foam. Harry felt a strange tingling sensation as he watched in amazement as the wound closed.

"Where did you get that, Daphne?" he asked.

"From my parents," she said as she corked the vial again.

"Do they support you in what you do?"

Daphne laughed up, but her laugh was without joy or warmth. Harry thought it was a sad sound.

"I'm sure they don't. If they knew all the things I've done and stolen from them, they'd probably take me out of Hogwarts on the spot."

Harry would have liked to know more about Daphne's family, but her tone made it all too clear to him that it probably wouldn't be a promising endeavour. Still, he couldn't deny it ... he was interested in what kind of circumstances a pureblood like Daphne had grown up in. That she stole from her family was surprising, to say the least. He himself had only stolen very rarely, at night when the hunger had simply become too bad, and even then it could be argued that he had only taken what was his due.

Daphne had been watching him intently during his train of thought, but said nothing in response. Instead, she handed him the vial, which was still almost full.

"I suggest you continue practising in your spare time," she said. "When you manage to sense your inner magic, you can contact me. Then we will continue with the search for your Animagus form. It's best not to send me your snow owl, but one of the school owls. It's better that no one knows what we're doing here."

"Believe it or not, that's what I thought," Harry replied.

Daphne nodded. "Good, so you're not a complete idiot. In fact, for a Gryffindor, you're not so bad."

"Daphne?"

"Hmm?"

"For a Slytherin, you're not so bad yourself."

Daphne raised her eyebrow before a smile curled around her lips. It was the second time Harry had seen her smile, after the night before.

"You have no idea what you've gotten yourself into, Harry."

It was a few hours later that Harry was lying in his bed. Ron's snoring filled the dormitory, but Harry couldn't sleep. Incessantly his thoughts circled around the previous events in the classroom, and Daphne's words.

"You could have sat here all night and still made no progress whatsoever. Trust me, I went through the same."

Still, it had annoyed him that she had stopped the test so quickly. Maybe he would have succeeded in the end, after all, a new spell didn't work right away on the first or second try either. Still, so far he had mastered every spell they learned in class at some point.

Knowing that he wouldn't be able to sleep anyway in his current state, Harry straightened up. He fumbled for the golden knife Daphne had given him, which now lay on his bedside table. It was dark in the dormitory, but Harry didn't need to see. With great accuracy, he brought the knife to his hand and pressed it into his skin. A cutting sound rang out and Harry could feel his blood welling up again.

Concentrate, he admonished himself.

He closed his eyes and tried to focus fully on the feeling of the pain and the blood on his skin.

Spirit Within. Spirit Within. I have to find my Spirit Within.

However, Harry felt no magic and no sign of any Spirit Within. Instead, the feeling of pain in his hand began to fade already. And no new blood was oozing out either.

Harry pressed the knife again, right into the wound. He sucked in his breath in pain. His heart was pounding in his chest and his ears were ringing. If Ron saw him now, he would undoubtedly ask him unpleasant questions, but his friend slept and continued to snore without a care in the world.

Harry continued to press with the knife. He could feel more and more blood running down his hand, leaving a warm, tingling, sickening sensation. He clenched his hand into a fist, thinking hard.

Come on. Come on. Blood from the wound. Blood in my veins. Inner magic. Spirit Within. Come on.

The minutes passed, during which Harry relentlessly tried to find the feeling Daphne had spoken of. But it was hopeless. The wound was tingling, the blood was sticky and Harry's heart was pounding with exhaustion, as if he had run a race. Yet he was as far from his Spirit Within as he was from a compliment from their Potions Master.

Harry had to admit to himself that perhaps this wouldn't be as quick as learning to fly or learning a new spell in class after all. In any case, it didn't seem to be something he could accomplish this night.

Frustrated, he put the knife back on the bedside table before reaching for the vial that stood beside it. He uncorked the vial and began to drip some of the liquid inside onto his hand. And like before with Daphne, the wound was healed completely after only a few seconds, as Harry could not see, but feel. Only the dried blood on his skin still testified to his failed experiment.

Harry let himself fall back into bed. Although he had come to terms with not becoming an Animagus that very night, today's events still left him restless. They were, in some small way, a reflection of everything he had experienced since he had learned that he was a wizard and that the entire world was very different from what he had previously imagined. Every day he learned something new, yet he knew that there was much, very much, that he did not yet know.

But it also bothered him that so many knew so much more than he did. He didn't even mean Daphne, who clearly knew much more than he did. No, what really bothered Harry was that everyone, witch or wizard, young or old, seemed to know him. And his parents. Everyone seemed to have an opinion about him, and expectations that he had to live up to in their eyes. In this new world he had fallen into, he was a hero for a deed he could not remember, whereas he had been a nobody for all those years before.

Yes, he was better off than ever before and he was more than happy that his life had taken this new direction ... but still ... who was he? Who did he want to be? What was his life meant for? And how could he make sure that his parents had not died for him in vain?

With a deep sigh, Harry turned on his side.

It was the same questions as every night, and as every night, he couldn't give an answer. All he knew was that he still had a hell of a lot to learn. The best thing would be to start learning a cutting spell first thing in the morning, so he wouldn't have to use that stupid knife any more...

AN:

Wow, over one hundred favorites and two hundred follows after just one chapter, that's awesome! Thank you so much! Thanks also to everyone who wrote reviews or just read and enjoyed the first chapter. I hope you enjoyed the second chapter as well.

These first two chapters, and the two chapters that follow, are what I would call the introductory phase of the story, where Harry and Daphne slowly get to know each other better. And in this chapter, Harry has definitely learned a lot more about Daphne. What is your impression of her? Would you also be as curious as Harry or would you make a quick getaway?

I've also already finished the next two chapters and will publish them in the next two weeks while I'm working on the fifth chapter. So you see, I have a lot planned for this story. But please let me know what you thought of the chapter and what your expectations are for the further course of the story. I am always very excited to read your thoughts. Also, feel free to ask me questions, I always try to answer them, even though I won't spoil any details ;)

Well then, until the next chapter, and have a wonderful Advent/winter season! Take care!

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