A/N: Happy 2022, everyone! I hope this year is being gentle to you so far.

I wrote this for AdiGallia9, for the Han/Leia Holiday Exchange 2021. This is right after the end of the book "Last Shot" by Daniel José Older, around three years after Return of the Jedi. The events of "Last Shot" are referenced but a passing familiarity with the book is enough to understand it. Other elements from Disney canon were incorporated, including a toddler by the name of Ben, but as far as I'm concerned, this little guy is otherwise not connected to the fascist man-child from the sequels, which could only be a fever dream in my 'verse. This work also contains explicit sex scenes. Please don't keep reading if you don't like any of that, and don't bother telling me about it. I honestly don't care what you like or expect from me; I'm not going anywhere. All that will get you is ridiculed on Tumblr.

To the rest of you: thank you for reading and kind comments are appreciated.

For your love I will go far
I wanna be wherever you are
I'm know I'm coming back for you

Our love is a river long
The best right in a million wrongs
I know I'm coming back to you

—Go Solo, Tom Rosenthal

The best right in a million wrongs

He wouldn't have admitted it to anyone under torture—and having been under torture, he knew what he was about—but part of Han had hoped to see Leia and their son waiting for him at the spaceport. Ben would be waving and crying for his Dada as he threw himself into Han's arms, and Han would tilt up the proud, smiling face of his wife to kiss her hello.

Had the Chevalier not landed on Hanna City at 0209, that fantasy would have been a bit more realistic than it was at present. The spaceport was a hubbub of activity at all hours, but outside, there was only the occasional night traffic as the city slept, and nobody but an air taxi waited for Han.

He let himself into the apartment as noiselessly as he could, dropping his go-bag and his boots by the door, and headed down the hall to his and Leia's bedroom. There, in the low light coming from the hallway, he finally saw the people his heart had been aching for, ever since he'd left. Ben had taken over Han's side of the bed, dark brown curls mussed and stuck to his forehead, drool falling from between his pink lips and pooling darkly on the bedsheets, his long limbs sprawled every which way—was it possible he'd grown some centims during the week Han had been away?

Leia lay on her side; the ancient t-shirt she'd taken long ago from Han's closet—black faded to grey, the name of Han's favourite Corellian band printed on the front, a list of dates and cities from the 5 BBY tour on the back—had ridden up her thigh, and her breath made a low, steady sound as it came out of her open mouth. She had to be congested again; all that air conditioning in the office all day never did her any good.

His family hadn't been waiting for him like in his fantasy, and it didn't matter one bit to Han. This was real, and it was better.

He took his blaster off and tucked it at the bottom of the locked drawer on his bedside table before dropping a kiss on Ben's temple. Then he walked around the bed, shedding his pants and shirt off before throwing them carelessly over the chair in the corner. Leia stirred, eyebrows knitting together as her eyes tried to focus.

'Han?'

He pressed his lips against the crown of her head before slipping into bed behind her. Untangling the sheets from between her legs, he threw them over both of them as Leia yawned and stretched.

'Hi, sweetheart,' Han whispered, wrapping an arm around her waist as Leia rolled on her back. After seeing her insubstantial figure during holocalls, so deceptively close yet out of reach, holding her in his arms, warm, soft, solid, felt like clipping back on a part of his heart he'd left behind.

'Welcome home,' Leia muttered, lips curling into a sleepy smile even as her eyes fell closed again and she nuzzled his chin, one cold foot wedging itself between Han's shins.

'What d'ya want for breakfast, Ben?'

'Yesh.'

'No, not do you want breakfast, what do you want for breakfast?'

'Yesh, bekfas.'

Her son's sweet little voice and Han's graver one carried from the kitchen as Leia left the 'fresher and followed the sounds of domestic endeavors. Miraculously, Ben had slept through the night again, and so had she—not without both of them tossing and turning for hours first. She had the fuzzy memory of Han arriving last night and spooning her shortly after she'd managed to doze off, and then she'd fallen deep asleep. So deep, she hadn't heard Han and Ben getting out of bed this morning.

'No; listen—what do you want for breakfast? Do you want pancakes?' Han was enunciating carefully, pointing his spatula at Ben. His light brown curls were all Leia could see as her baby boy sat on the kitchen counter.

'Cakes!' he chirped.

'Okay, paaancakes,' Han repeated, smiling at Leia as he spotted her.

'Pa-caaakes,' Ben repeated obediently, if not perfectly.

Han laughed as he turned to the stove. 'Good enough.'

'Where are these pancakes?' Leia chimed in.

'Momma!' Ben cried, twisting on the counter. He pointed excitedly at Han. 'Dada make cakes!'

'Yes, love, Dad is here and he's making pancakes.' Leia's eyes swept the counter, but Han had put everything away from Ben and kept him entertained with some of his picture books as he ladled batter onto the pan. 'Is there a pancake for me?'

Ben thought about it for a few seconds before saying, 'No!''

'No?' Leia pouted at him. 'Momma doesn't get a pancake?'

'Yesh!' Ben said, and laughed. 'Cake fo' you, cake fo' Ben, cake fo'... all!'

Smiling, Leia pressed a kiss onto his unruly curls before stepping up to her husband.

'Hey, you,' she said, tilting up her head.

'Hey,' Han said, a single syllable so full of warmth and longing, it released a knot in Leia's stomach. He moved the pan off the fire before bending down to kiss her, one hand cradling her cheek as Leia's hands came up to his waist.

There hadn't been a doubt in her mind that he would come back. Not one. That wouldn't have been the Han Solo she knew and had fallen in love with, the one who always came back, no matter what. But part of her had still been worried.

Things had been tough recently. Becoming parents had thrown them both into the deep end of their relationship, a bond much deeper and scarier than either one of them could have predicted. They had finally seemed to be getting the hang of it when Ben entered the terrible twos. On top of that, Leia was still part of the efforts to reconstruct democracy—sometimes she thought fighting a war had been easier—and Han had yet to find his place in all of it after quitting his military rank. She'd known about his insecurities regarding parenthood; she'd just never thought how deep they still ran until he'd told her in that holocall. It wasn't him leaving that she'd been afraid of; it was him staying and realizing how unhappy he was.

'Been a while since I've seen you cook,' she told him now. Until Lando's present, Han had been in charge of both meals. Leia had been in charge of ordering takeout. 'What happened to BX? You didn't… decommission him for what happened, did you?'

Leia narrowed her eyes with suspicion, moving back closer to the counter to watch Ben.

'Ah, no,' Han laughed, turning back to his pancakes. 'Trust me, not for lack of wanting. I just need some space from droids. For a while.'

'Makes sense. He's been a great help to us, though… especially to me. Saved you from my disastrous cooking more than once,' she reminded him.

'Yeah, yeah, we'll turn him back on tomorrow,' Han said. 'And your cookin's not disastrous, you just need to not want to do a million other things while you're cookin'.'

'Mm. Not a chance.'

'Dada, cake!' Ben cried impatiently.

'I'm workin' on it, buddy,' Han told him. He shook his head, but smiled at Leia as she started taking out plates. 'He got that from you.'

Leia slapped his ass playfully.

There was more talking to be had, she knew, even if she thought she'd gotten through to him during their last holocall. But that conversation could wait a little longer. Right now, her husband was back, her child was laughing, and that was all Leia needed.

Han had been lying very still on his back for the past hour. Maybe it was only a half hour, but he couldn't move to check the chrono. In any case, the dark and the stillness made it feel like an eternity.

Yes, he'd missed his family terribly while he'd been away with Lando and the others. He'd especially missed rolling over and finding Leia next to him. But boy, it had felt too good to have a bunk for himself again, for a few days. Not being woken up by a little whimpering body wedging himself between him and Leia at ungodly hours. Not having a very small, very solid foot punch him in the face, or the stomach, or—worst of all—the groin. Being able to roll over and stretch all he wanted without fear of jostling and waking up a toddler who'd only recently fallen asleep.

He heard a rustle over the soft sounds of Ben's breathing, and he looked across the bed. Carefully, Leia was untangling herself from the bedsheets and Ben's grasp before sliding out of bed and out of the door.

Had she been awake all this time, too? Holding his breath, Han looked sideways at his son. Still fast asleep. Maybe being away from Han had cured his sleep regression.

Stop that, Han chided himself. Leia said it was supposed to last just a few weeks.

Whatever it was, it didn't look like Ben was waking up right now, but he was still taking up an enormous portion of the bed and, since Han couldn't find a comfortable position at present, getting up for a bit sounded like a good idea.

Reaching back with one foot, he slowly slid towards the edge until he touched the floor; then he stood up and held his breath. Nothing. Han walked backwards and almost on tiptoe towards the open door; even once he was outside, he still peeked into the gloom of the room and waited for a few seconds.

He finally breathed out and followed the light into the kitchen.

Leia was leaning into the counter, drinking from a glass of water. She set it down and pressed her wrists against it, letting the condensation cool off her skin. BX was nowhere to be seen; Han assumed he was still deactivated in the closet where he'd stuffed him that morning.

'Woke you up?' she asked, looking up before he'd even come into her line of vision. Much as she wanted to ignore her Force-sensitivity—and much as Han had been skeptical of it for a long time—Han thought it could be pretty handy to be able to tell when someone was trying to sneak up on you.

'Couldn't have, was already awake,' he answered, closing the hallway door behind him before walking up to the counter and standing next to Leia. She turned her head to him and gave him a tired smile.

'What was it like to sleep on a bed all on your own without interruptions again? Tell me everything.'

Han chuckled, shuffling closer and leaning into the other side of the counter. 'Fabulous. But I did miss you.'

'So I've gathered,' Leia said, giving him a playful look. 'What did you miss about me? My political ramblings?'

Definitely not, he almost said, but—he kind of had.

'I've missed us,' Han blurted out. He'd already told her one thing he'd been afraid to admit; he might as well go all in, full honesty, even if he made a fool of himself with his poorly worded thoughts. 'Just…us, y'know? Lately it's like… even when we're alone, I'm thinking about Ben. Worryin' about him. And we're not alone enough in the first place!'

Leia sighed. 'I know. We really need a date night.'

'Yeah.'

He held her gaze, feeling the weight of unsaid things between them. But whatever it was they each wanted to say, right now, in the still of the night, in the middle of their kitchen, it was just them again, and everything else could wait.

Han came up behind her, hands resting at her waist, and pressed a kiss on her shoulder.

'I did miss your rants,' he told her, hands stroking her back, 'an' your snoring.'

'I do not snore,' Leia protested, leaning back into his chest.

'That's what you think.' He pressed a kiss against her temple. 'Just a bit.'

Leia turned her head back and he captured her lips, trying to show her how much he'd missed her, how much he loved her. His hands slid down her sides to her bare thighs, stroking her warm skin, then moved upwards again under her shirt, skimming over her soft stomach; her ribs, rising and falling and full of her life; her breasts, where he could feel her passionate heart beating. His fingertips traced the contours of her breasts lightly, making her giggle breathlessly into his mouth.

'No tickling,' she admonished.

'Sorry, Your Highness,' Han told her with a smirk, but he wasn't too sorry as he looked into her sparkling eyes and radiant smile. His thumbs circled her nipples, the roughened pads brushing against them. Leia's head fell back against his shoulder, sighing as her eyes closed. 'This better?'

'It's an improvement, yes.'

He lowered his head, planting another kiss into her hair, then nudging her to give him better access to her neck. His tongue pressed against the spot where her ear and her jaw met and sucked, careful not to leave a mark, as his hands kept working on her breasts. His mouth moved a little lower, sucking again on the delicate skin of her neck, and his hands did too, tracing again the landscape of her body.

He shifted a little and kissed her nape, then moved his right hand over her underwear, three fingers brushing a path from her mound to her lips and back, nails scraping against the thin fabric a few times as Leia rested contentedly into him, then arching her back slightly as she grabbed his hand and pressed it firmly into her.

'What about me? You missed me?' he asked, his voice lowering to a rasp against her ear.

'I missed that,' Leia said. 'I missed your hands.'

'You missed fuckin' my hands,' Han told her, making a fist and moving it as she began to rub herself against it.

Leia opened her eyes. 'I did. Did you miss me fucking your hands?'

'Always do. Don't know what else to do with them.'

'Must be hard… to get anything else done.'

Two fingers dipped under her underwear and stroked her lips before massaging the sweet spot far back between them and bringing his fingers back up through her slick center.

'Han,' Leia panted, arms stretched out over the counter as she held onto the edge. He kept working her up, fingers teasing her clit but not stopping there yet. He felt his cock harden against her ass as she ground against him and into his hand.

'Han… the door?'

'Closed,' he grunted, checking just in case. His eyes had kept checking for any intrusions but, determined to make Leia forget for a few minutes, he decided it was time for a change of setting.

'What are you doing?' Leia protested weakly as he moved away, turning around to see him grabbing a chair from the dining table.

'Get to the couch,' he whispered and, after opening the door and listening for a couple of minutes, he closed it again and put the chair up against it. Leia gave him an anxious look.

'He'll be fine,' Han said, walking back to her. 'Elsie is in his room, she'll go if she hears anythin' and she'll take care of him for a few minutes.'

Grabbing her hand, he led her to the couch and they sat down.

'Okay,' she said, nodding. 'Don't think we should take long, though.'

'Just wanted to do this properly, sweetheart,' Han said, using his clean hand to cup her cheek and bring her in for a kiss. His tongue swept against her lower lip before dipping inside, and Leia moaned and wound her hands through his hair as her tongue matched his pace.

Pulling apart with a last peck, he slid down to the floor and knelt, grabbing one of her legs and lifting it over his shoulder as Leia leaned back. Sliding her shirt up, he kissed her breasts and the smattering of freckles over her ribs, tracing her constellations with his tongue.

Next, his lips tended to her thighs—and there, out of sight for anyone else, he nipped and sucked gently until a small red mark blossomed on her skin. He pressed a final kiss there and looked up. Leia was leaning back on her elbows, biting her bottom lip, her dark eyes fixed on him. They had often done that, during the war, when they would be pulled to different corners of the galaxy and reunited for short periods of time. Something to remember me by, Leia had told him the first time, with that smirk that held the power to undo him hovering over the strawberry red mark on his stomach. He wasn't going anywhere now. He just wanted to be there, on her skin.

'Are you leaving again?' she asked quietly, one eyebrow raising. Her fingers stretched out to his as they splayed on her thigh, and he let go to grab her hand, head shaking solemnly.

'Not as long as you want me.'

'I do. I want you,' Leia whispered, and although part of their words were meant as sex banter, they were truer than ever.

He pressed open-mouthed kisses over her underwear, following the curves of her body. His tongue swept an arc between her legs, then sucked on the spot her clit would be under until the fabric was drenched and she was tugging at his hair.

'Stars, Han, just take it off,' she gasped, one hand pushing down her underwear. She rose impatiently to meet his mouth as he bent his head down again, until he got her writhing and whisper-gasping encouragements and curses alike.

'Yes, right there—kriff, your mouth—! Harder, love, please—'

Her hands grasped at the couch and one of his shoulders while she tensed and bowed back under him. His pants were feeling too tight at the moment, the heady scent of her sex and the feeling of her body taking so much pleasure from him driving up his own arousal. It was tough job work not to reach down and stroke himself, but coming all over their couch was something he knew better than to do.

With a last great shudder, Leia fell back and sighed, then let out a breathless laugh. Han wiped his mouth on his shirt and looked at her, one leg thrown over the back of the couch, arms splayed out over her relaxed face, his old-as-dirt shirt dark with sweat and riding over her stomach, her sweet, damp curls exposed as her underwear hung from one knee. He was one lucky bastard.

'Definitely missed that sight,' he told her with a smirk, tilting his chin at her post-orgasm state before planting a kiss on one of her knees and standing up. Leia chuckled again and reached out for his hand.

The prospect of going back to their hijacked bed so soon didn't appeal much to either of them. After pulling the chair away from the door again and leaving it ajar in case Ben or Elsie came looking for them, Han and Leia took the couch's cushions down and snuggled up on the floor.

Leia knew she was going to pay for this in the morning, but moments of privacy like this had been so rare recently, she didn't feel like going to sleep just yet.

Wrapped around each other, they made out lazily for a while. One of Leia's hands ran down Han's ribs and slid between their bodies to lightly stroke his cock over his underpants, as she hooked her leg over his waist to bring herself closer. They weren't going to do anything else tonight, but it felt good to touch each other like that. Comforting.

'We really need a date night,' Han said, his eyes dropping shut at her gentle touch.

'How about Saturday?' Leia asked, sucking lightly at a spot under his clavicle.

He opened one eye to look at her. 'Really?'

'Really. Ben has been doing much better. Elsie can handle it.'

'You know, Lando and Kasha might still be around. Could ask them to do it. Lando owes me.'

'Hm. Not sure if he does or he just squared up, love.'

'Bah. It was his mess, too.'

Leia chuckled and pulled away, hands stilling on his chest as Han stroked her back, looking suddenly thoughtful.

'Leia, I've been thinking today… I don't wanna do the Pilots Commission job anymore.'

'Of course you don't.'

Han's body tensed against her, and his voice was a touch defensive when he spoke. 'What's that s'pposed to mean?'

'Not what you're probably thinking,' Leia said, unfazed. 'Han, you hate meetings.'

'I do!' he said miserably. Ever since he'd joined the Commission, all he'd done when he got home was either complain about it, or hide the fact that he wanted to complain about it. She didn't need the Force to reach a conclusion.

'I thought this was what you wanted to do—you seemed excited.'

'Yeah, I dunno… it seemed exciting, on paper,' he said, rubbing a hand over his chin. 'But I don't care about all that bureaucratic crap. I can't even make it five minutes before everything starts spinnin'.'

'Mhm. Well, that's fine, you know. You don't have to do it.'

'But I gotta do something.' Han rolled his eyes with a sigh. 'Can't keep quittin' everything.'

There it was, his insecurities rearing their heads again.

'You don't. You don't quit everything. You've never quit me. '

He smiled then, hazel eyes soft as he looked back at her in the dim glow of the kitchen light.

'How could I?'

'And besides—do you think I don't know how enormous this all has been for you after the war? I do. I really do. Your whole life changed—partly so we could be together. I mean, no wonder you were eager to get out of here!'

'I wasn't—' he began to protest, but she talked over him.

'You're here with Ben most of the time, doing stuff you hate for the New Republic. Of course you were going crazy. But I—' Leia sighed, weighing her words before speaking them out, 'I wish you'd talk to me more about it, instead of feeling guilt because you haven't found your footing yet.'

This time, he bent his head close and kissed her again.

'I'm sorry, sweetheart. It's just—seemed unfair to complain. Especially 'cos you're dealin' with your own shit, too, but you're still like, a super mom.'

'Han, I'm not,' Leia said, her heart squeezing in her chest with a mix of gratitude and embarrassment. Was that really how he saw her? The Force knew she tried her best, but she'd felt so… ill-prepared for motherhood, so many times. 'I'm not a super mom.'

'Yeah, you are.'

'No, I'm not,' she insisted, and this time the impatience in her voice made him raise his eyebrows in surprise. 'And I need you to see it not just for you, but for me, too. If you think I'm perfect, then you can't see when I'm struggling—or worse, then you'll think I'm falling short.'

To be fair to Han, he had noticed she had struggled, the first year. They had both learnt together, cried together, been an exhausted mess together. Somehow during the past year, they had started to take more for granted when it came to each other's experience of parenthood.

'I'd never think that, Leia,' Han said softly, smoothing her hair away from her face, then trailing his hand down her arm. 'But—okay. Fair point. I didn't think about that. It's just—you don't look like you're struggling. Maybe you need to talk to me more about that.'

Leia smiled, rolling her eyes at the irony. 'True. Got me there.'

Rolling on her back, she grabbed one of her husband's hands and laid it on her stomach, fingers tracing the veins and calluses and muscles as they lay in comfortable silence, until Han broke it.

'So, what now? How does one figure out what they wanna do for a living?'

'Actually,' Leia said, wetting her lips, 'I thought about something you said. On our last call. You said that being out there in space feels right, but that being here also feels right.'

'Yeah.'

'What if… you had your own shipping company? I mean, transporting stuff is part of smuggling, you just wouldn't be doing the smuggling part. At least not in a way that can be traced back to you,' she added, giving him a sideways glance.

Han snorted. 'Are you endorsing smuggling off the record, Senator?'

Leia shrugged one shoulder. 'I'm not technically endorsing anything. Anyway, if you had your own company, you could manage your own time. Do short runs and be back home for dinner, or work only a few times a week. Maybe even hire out people, eventually.'

Han was staring at the ceiling, a look of concentration on his face, as if he was holo-projecting that career path for him on the white plaster to better analyze it.

'Well?'

'That—yeah. Yeah,' he repeated, then let out a half-surprised, half-relieved sort of laugh. 'I don't even need that much capital to start with. Just contacts.'

'And we can get those.'

'What about Ben?' Han asked.

'We'll find a daycare for him. It's time.'

'Are you sure? He's still so small… What if he hates it? Hates us?' He looked at her, worry lines over his face, and she pulled him closer for a kiss.

'See? You're a great dad. But let's talk more about this whole thing in the morning,' Leia added, stifling a yawn. Rolling on her side, her back towards Han, she let him pull her closer and wrap his arms around her.

'Shipping… ha. Never thought of that,' Han said, before yawning himself. 'Maybe I'll make enough to move to a bigger place. Get you a proper home office. No more Mothma waking up the kid. 'Nother room to have sex in when the bed's taken.'

She chuckled, her eyelids feeling too heavy to stay up now. 'Sounds marvelous.'

'Leia?'

'Hm?'

'Shit gets tough sometimes. Routine. Figuring out stuff. But I'll never not want this. I've done a lot of crazy things—'

'I know, I was there for most of them,' Leia mumbled.

'—asking you to marry me on Endor was one of the craziest things I've ever done. And the best one.'

Her eyes fully closed now, Leia smiled and tucked a foot between Han's legs.

'I love you, too. Just remember that in about five minutes, you're on Ben duty,' she managed to say, dozing off before she could hear his answer, and the sounds of her son quietly pushing the door to the hallway open.