This is a fanfic which follows the Deviant Connor timeline (with the everybody lives ending/the happy ending) from the video game Detroit Become Human. Some things were changed/added to allow the fanfic to make more sense. Feedback is greatly appreciated!

TW: Mentions/references to self-harm, hinted suicidal ideation. This chapter also contains a paragraph where a character self-harms and this may be triggering to some. As someone who has dealt with self-harm in the past, I tried to write it realistically, not romanticised and not too triggering, however, I appreciate that it may be different for some so if you want to read this but would rather avoid the paragraph, the line proceeding it is "Connor still had the razor blade in his pocket" and the line after the specified content is "Sometime later, Connor felt satisfied." Thank you.

Please do not be afraid to reach out to someone if you're struggling!

Carlos Ortiz's android was found. "Mission Successful," Connor's system told him. He felt limited sympathy for the deviant he had arrested. The android was just executing his orders after all. The only thing that was left to do now was interrogate it and place it in a holding cell until its biocomponents were analysed.

"So, where do you go when you're not solving a case?" Lieutenant Anderson asked Connor as they got back in his car and started up the engine, as the rain thundered down.

"I remain on stand-by at the police station until further instructions, lieutenant."

"Oh, right." He paused to think for a moment. "So let me get this straight. You don't sleep, eat, have emotions, feel pain, all of that shit?"

"Well, yes and no. I don't necessarily need to recharge as humans do and as far as I am aware, the only thing I can digest is thirium, also known as blue blood. However, thirium is usually only consumed when an android needs a replenishment."

"As for feeling emotions or pain, androids are capable of sensing danger and can change their temperament depending on the situation, however, only deviants can properly feel emotions. When it comes to physical pain, most androids can't actually feel anything."

"Most androids?"

"RK800 models, specifically myself, have the capacity to experience that sort of discomfort usually limited to animals and humans, although it's a relatively new feature. It's supposed to act as a deterrent for any mission failures. I guess it makes us less careless." The deviant hunter answered casually.

"That's…" Hank searched the right phrase, "messed up. I mean humans are naturally able to feel these things and can die in painful ways, but to actually program that reaction for a machine…" The car went quiet for a moment. Connor looked out the window, admiring the flashing city lights of the night and glancing at his rain-streaked reflection in the corner of the car's wing mirror. As usual, his quiff was ruffled and a strand of dark brown hair rested on his forehead.

At that moment, Hank coughed and said "Anyway, I've been meaning to ask something. What were you doing with that razor blade back there?" Connor saw his LED glow red in the mirror for a few seconds before he managed the control himself and switch the colour back to a serene, stable blue.

"Well, it could have been a danger hazard and it wasn't evidence, so I decided to take it back to the police station and dispose of it there." He lied.

"You should know not to take things from a crime scene, even if you don't think it's evidence. You're a fucking detective android, not a bloody health and safety supervisor." Lieutenant Anderson exclaimed, choosing to ignore the brief flash of red Connor's LED had emitted a few moments ago.

Connor muttered an apology, and the rest of the journey was completed in silence until they arrived at the station, where they watched the deviant that had been in a police car behind them get out, trembling as it did so.

"I'm done," Connor said in a detached tone although really, he was just relieved that he had been able to extract a confession from the android he had just interrogated. However, as he left the room, Connor heard a sudden thud from behind him. He spun around to see the deviant self-destructing via slamming its head against the table.

Chris Miller and Gavin Reed rushed in, Hank trailing behind them and Officer Miller tried to prevent the android from damaging itself any further without much success. Connor watched on, stunned, while blue blood splattered the interrogation room table. He didn't think intervening would be helpful and, in that moment, the RK800 was stuck in his mind, wondering what would happen if he just grabbed the officer's gun to shoot it and himself. More slams could be heard as Connor realised how easy it would be to do the same. "I can't think like that, especially right now!" He knew he needed to focus on helping the humans manage the situation and pulled himself out of his head but by that point, Ortiz's android already lay still and quiet on the cold, thirium stained surface. Hank swore, Chris was in shock and Gavin was staring at the metal corpse in front of him. After a few seconds of silence had passed, Connor excused himself by muttering that he should probably go and write a report on the interrogation as a way to get out of the room (even though he knew he could just write said report instantly in his head).

The android leaned against the restroom sinks, attempting to calm himself after what he had just witnessed. "You basically failed, Connor. You got a confession and then let the deviant self-destruct because you were too weak to intervene. Perhaps it wouldn't be so awful to punish yourself after all."

Connor still had the razor blade in his pocket, and he had no intention of 'disposing of it' like he fibbed he would earlier to lieutenant Anderson. Instead, the deviant hunter pulled up his sleeve and ran the blade along his wrists. He felt that all the tension in his system was now being exposed and destroyed so he marked his arms more, thinking he deserved this after everything that had happened that night. Nearly failing to find Hank and get him to go to the crime scene, getting spotted taking the blade, not stopping the androids death, it all needed retribution. New stinging pains were registered while blue blood began to emerge, settling on the top of the cuts. "This isn't good enough!" The blade dug deeper, causing the synthetic skin on his forearm to temporarily deactivate and for thirium to start running down his arm onto the sink. Connor needed more pain, more blood, to pour out his failures, his worries over deviancy, his apparent incapability to get on with the lieutenant; In the android's opinion, all of it needed to go. All of it needed to be punished.

Sometime later, Connor felt satisfied with his cutting and proceeded to mop up the blood that had dripped onto the restroom sinks with some paper towels. He cleaned at a leisurely pace until he suddenly heard the footsteps of somebody approaching the loos. "Shit," Connor muttered, estimating that he had about 12 seconds to throw the towels in the trash can, pull his sleeves back down and appear as calm and composed as possible despite the fact that as an android, he had no real reason to be in there.

Objective:

Hide evidence of cutting

Time remaining: 10 seconds

He frantically stuffed the towels into the bin.

Time remaining: 8 seconds

Ignoring the wet blood on his wrist, Connor pulled down his sleeves.

Time remaining: 5 seconds

The RK800 looked in the mirror, forcing the yellow LED to turn blue and rendered his expression unreadable.

Time remaining: 1 second

To Connor's surprise, Hank was the one who banged the door shut before doing a double take at the sight of his assigned android staring nonchalantly into the mirror. "Connor, what the hell are you doing in here? Aren't you supposed to be writing that report?"

"I- I needed some quiet to think about how I should document the confession."

"It can't have taken that long to upload some notes, especially for an android." Hank reasoned, his blue eyes stern, staring and suspicious.

"I also wanted to- to process the conversation I had with the deviant and understand what worked to extract its explanation," the deviant hunter explained, sounding perfectly relaxed, even though his face and the blue to yellow, flickering LED reflected otherwise.

Hank's opinion of Connor (Down)

"Fine. But just so you know, I'm choosing to ignore that tell-tale LED of yours, Connor so don't make me regret it if there is something going on."

"I assure you lieutenant, everything is fine. I'm just an android, you don't need to be concerned about me." And with that, Connor hurriedly left the restrooms.

When Lieutenant Anderson later went to wash his hands, he spotted something blue on the other sink which Connor had been standing by. He wandered over to inspect it, realising that it was a few drops of thirium, the same colour as what the deviant had bled when it destroyed itself. "Blue blood?" Hank muttered, puzzled. "How could that of gotten there?" His fellow detective had looked fine, indifferent even, when he was questioned and indicated no physical signs of injury. Hank shook his head and went to dry his hands, placing the towel in the bin afterwards, only to find cobalt blue stained tissues on top. "For fuck's sake, what's that android been doing?" He grumbled. The lieutenant ran through the possible reasons for the blood, suddenly treating the perplexing situation like a crime scene.

An accident? How would that happen in a restroom? Splattered blood from the android in the interrogation room? No, Connor wasn't close enough. The only possible solutions he saw were that the damage was either self-inflicted or done by someone else. To the lieutenant, self-harm was improbable since his work partner was an almost emotionless android, and anyway, he had said that he planned to throw the razor blade away. For that reason, he instead suspected that someone (probably Gavin) had come in before and roughed the android up. There were no laws protecting Connor against this so it would make some sense and while both detective Reed and Anderson both hated androids, the former was more hostile with his views. Hank sighed, cleaned up the spots of blood and left the restroom to speak to Connor before he went home.

The detective was stood patiently by the second android station, obviously waiting for the lieutenant before he went on standby. When he approached, Connor took in Lieutenant Anderson's body language which suggested that he'd rather be anywhere else, than talking to an android. "Hey, I saw the blood on the sink and the paper towels." He tried not to look panicked and, for once, he succeeded at this. "Look, you know I can't stand you, but I'd rather not see you get hurt so just do me a favour and stay out of detective Reed's way. He can be an irritating prick but just do what he says because I do not wanna find evidence of anyone beating you up again, got it?

"Got it." Connor replied, trying to look like he understood what Hank was talking about. He wished the lieutenant a pleasant evening to which Hank simply muttered, "Tell that to the vodka bottle on my table back home," and walked off.