Apriltober 2022 15 Stand Guard (Mia, Irina, Sharon)

a/n: Mia is taking her job seriously! So seriously that she may have to fight Irina and Murderess.

All the good things belong to Monolith Soft.

Mia practically bounced up to the approaching figures. She'd been waiting out in the Oblivian elements for what felt like hours and this was the first chance to do more than rub sand out of her eyes. "Hi! I'm the one on duty, so I betcha I'm the one you're looking for."

The two stopped, a blonde with sharp and silver eyes and and her companion, muffled head to toe in the most expensive and sleekest gear that Mia had ever seen. She wondered if she could grab a quick snapshot of the mystery woman to put on her mood board of Life Goals. The blonde woman greeted her. "Hi, Mia. We ran a little late but here we are."

"Cool, cool." Mia stepped in front of them as they started to walk towards a canvas shelter.

"Cute. Get out of our way," snapped the mystery guest, revealing her identity. Mia was tickled to have guessed correctly; Irina had brought along her snooty friend from the Curators. Shanon? Sharon? Something like that. Mia had long admired her personal style, if not her manners.

"No can do. I'm on guard duty!"

"Move."

"Nope. Mr. Secretary picked me himself," Mia gushed. "He looked at me and just knew I was right for the job. How amazing is that? I mean, he's not wrong, but to have Secretary Bad Ass pick you, wow. And he's not wrong! Chief agreed. You know, I call him Chief because we're so tight, you know who I'm talking about, the best BLADE in NLA, the one that Elma hangs with and ..."

"Colonel Elma is the team leader," Irina pointed out.

"Sure, because Chief just has too much awesomeness to spread around to be leader of just one team."

Sharon (or maybe Shanon) leaned angrily on one hip. "Get. Out. Of the way. Fool."

"Not until you tell me the correct word."

"Please." She managed to make it sound like it rhymed with "fleas" and was about as attractive.

Mia still found it funny. "That's the magic word, and good for you. But I need today's challenge password. You know it. I can't give you a hint but, um, gosh, I just can't."

Irina nodded. "I have it. Parsley."

Mia smiled brightly. "And mint! Okay, that's good. Now for the second bit." Before Irina could react, Mia slapped her.

"What the ..." Irina looked at her in shock. Shanon (or Sharon) already had her psycho launchers powering up and trained on Mia.

It was a good thing she was a fast talker, Mia considered. This part got tricky, depending on the customer. Frye had laughed, H.B. had looked like he was about to spit on her, but this was the first time she had felt mortal danger. "Look, we gotta test for Definians. The only way to break their shape-shifting whatnot is solid physical contact."

"You didn't have to slap her!" The psycho launchers were still ready to fire.

"Honest, that's the best way. Trust me. I have more experience with their tricks than I can mention in polite company, in places where the sun hasn't shone since I was a kid. So, Irina, you're good." She took a deep breath, reminded herself of her absolutely crucial responsibility, and lifted her own weapon to block Sharon (or maybe it really was Shanon). "But not you."

"You have got to be kidding me."

"Look, Mia, it's fine. She's been with me the entire trip, from NLA to here. There is no way she could have been switched. She's my guest," Irina emphasized.

Mia shrugged as best she could with her hands full of shiny raygun. "We already did the password, but I still need to do the touch test."

"I will make you hurt, and your children, and your grandchildren," growled Shanon/Sharon.

"I suppose I can do it gently. Are you ticklish?" asked Mia.

Irina broke the stalemate. "Just let the kid do her job, Shar. But," and here her eyes drilled into Mia, "I would take it as a personal favor if you didn't hurt my friend."

"I'll be like a whisper," promised Mia. Sharon (Mia had know it all along) removed her helmet with the angriest sequence of snaps Mia had ever heard. Mia reached over and cupped Sharon's cheek in her hand, gently sliding her fingers along the edge of the woman's face. "See? Easy peasy." She smiled at the two, but couldn't help from flicking her fingers slightly. She looked at Sharon with a small frown. "Wow, you use a LOT of foundation, you know that? Can I give you a bit of advice?"

Sharon was looking at her with wonder. Irina was covering a cough, probably from a sudden gust of dusty wind.

"The Ma-non have a fantastic skincare line, and they've launched a new brand with some products that work wonders on mature skin. ... gosh, Irina, that cough is really bad. Never mind, I'll send you the deets later. You can go on in and get something to drink."

a/n: High stakes poker game, out in Oblivia, end of every pay period. Frye runs it. Sharon's money is good at the bar, not at the table. In hindsight.

Next up: Honey pot ... Oh for crying out loud I am trying my best not to write more on the Lila Brown AU.