(The Dwarf in the Dirt)

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I really don't own Bones.

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"See, Ms. Defonte, when a man can't have the woman that he loves he gets a bit crazy. One brother, he died for you right there. The other one, your husband, you put him through hell." She didn't want him to tell her husband about her affair with her brother-in-law, but Booth considered Nicole Defonte a fool. Of course her husband Derek already knew about it. He knew and Booth believed that Derek Defonte decided to kill his brother Bryce to keep Nicole for himself. It was just a matter of time before he proved it.

Love was complicated even when it was one sided. He'd awoke from his coma in love with his partner. He wasn't really sure if he had been in love before his surgery, but he had seen what life could be like with her and he wanted that life so much. He didn't want a life where he was just Brennan's partner and friend. He wanted it all, but he knew that he couldn't have it.

Brennan didn't love him not in a romantic way. He did believe that she loved him, but more as a friend. He knew he was right because if she did love him romantically he was certain that he would know it. He was a people person and he could read people like a book, or at least he could before his surgery. There was that niggling feeling in the back of his mind that made him wonder if his powers of observation had been destroyed, so that did sow doubt and that is where his dilemma lay.

After confiding in Cam and Sweets they had both tried to assure him that his love for his partner was just temporary and that in a few weeks it would fade away. They were afraid that he would hurt Brennan if he pressed his case with her and that held him back. He never wanted to be the cause of pain for his friend and yet, how could he forward his case with her if he couldn't even mention his love to her? His memory was a little off and his feelings seemed to be more intense since his surgery, but he remembered something his friends didn't know anything about.

He had been drawn to Brennan since the day he had met her. The sight of her was breathtaking and from that moment he knew that she would always be his standard when it came to beauty and intelligence. She had been so beautiful standing on the stage and her lecture confirmed just how smart she was. He had always been drawn to intelligent women and in his heart Brennan had been as close to the personification of perfection as she could be.

Of course, in reality she was far from perfect. She was a genius and she knew it. Brennan was filled with pride and wasn't above gloating about her accomplishments and she was the most direct person he had ever met. At first all of those things had been a source of irritation to him, but eventually Booth realized that she wasn't like anyone he had ever met before and her accomplishments were important. When he'd had time to think about it, he'd realized that she should be proud of everything she had done. He was proud of his accomplishment, so why couldn't Brennan be proud of hers?

As the weeks went by and he recovered from his surgery, all of his friends were determined to make him forget about his love for Brennan. They wanted him to let the idea go. What he couldn't really understand was why. Why talk him out of pursuing Brennan? Didn't he have a right to be happy? Didn't Brennan have a right to know that he loved her and wanted to be with her? What if what he wanted was what Brennan wanted? He wanted to make her happy as well as himself. Why was that so impossible? Why was that so wrong?

"Pops it's good to see you." Booth entered his grandfather's room and handed the old man a box of chocolate chip cookies and a bag of granny smith apples.

Surprised to his grandson in his room, Hank slipped his eye glasses off and laid them on the coffee table along with the book he had been reading. "Shrimp, did I forget you were coming today?" A quick glance at the calendar next to the door and he shook his head. "It's Thursday. You don't come to see me unless it's the weekend. What's wrong? Is Parker okay?"

"Nothing's wrong, Pops." Booth placed the cookies and apples on the coffee table. "I just came to see you that's all." His intention had been to talk to Hank about Brennan when he called in sick that morning, but now that he was standing in front of his grandfather, he wasn't sure if he should bring it up. Moving over to the chair next to the bed, he placed some distance between himself and Hank. "You doing okay?"

Hank might be old, but there was nothing wrong with his power of observation. "Yeah I'm fine." As he observed his boy's body language Hank started to worry about his grandson. "You're looking good. I was worried about that tumor thing and the coma, but you came through it okay . . . didn't you? You are okay aren't you? Be truthful Seeley."

"I'm okay . . . well . . . I think I've changed, Pops. Bones says I have and so does Sweets and Cam." Booth rubbed his hands together as if he was trying to warm them up. "I've forgot how to do some stuff. Not important stuff, but stuff . . ."

"Like what?" Hank was beginning to worry. "Seeley, is your tumor back?"

He was worrying his grandfather and Booth hadn't meant to do that. "No, no, it's still gone . . . I forgot how to work on plumbing. Bones bought me a plumber's book for dummies, so I got around that problem when I had to fix my pipes in my apartment, but there has been other stuff. Not important stuff . . . it's just, I don't think I'm me anymore. Some of me is missing."

"Missing." Hank's concern was becoming full blown. "Listen Son, just because you've forgot somethings doesn't mean parts of you are missing. I've been getting a little forgetful for years. It's part of growing old. I used to have a steel trap mind, but in my thirties I had start filling out lists when I went to the store. I've forgot a lot of things over the years, it happens. That doesn't mean you're not you. I guess the tumor they took out, it might have affected your memory, but you are still you."

Oh how he wished he could believe his grandfather, but the evidence was pointing to the fact that he wasn't who he used to be. "Did I love Bones before my surgery? Cam and Sweets say I didn't and that it's all part of the tumor thing. They . . . "

Snorting, Hank shook his head. "Of course you were. Cam and that kid is wrong. You've loved Temperance for a long time."

A little stunned, Booth stared at his grandfather in a state of disbelief. His mind racing, he finally protested. "But Cam and Sweets . . . "

Impatient, Hank leaned forward trying to lessen the distance between them without being obvious. "Forget those two . . . look, I can't tell you how many times we've talked about that partner of yours. You've talked about how beautiful she is, how smart she is, what a great friend she is to you, how much you really like hanging out with her . . . doesn't that sound like love? It does to me. I can't remember the last time we got together and we didn't talk about Temperance . . . You've been in love with her for a long time. I have no idea why you haven't tried to do something about it, but you love her, boy. This is not new. If anything I would be worried right now if you didn't talk about that partner of yours. You're still you, Seeley. If you've forgotten some stuff then so be it. You can always relearn that stuff, but you know the important stuff. You know who me and Parker is. You know we love you and you love Temperance. You haven't forgot the things you need to know . . . okay?"

A sense of relief filling him, Booth gave his grandfather a smile. "Thanks Pops. I really needed to talk to you."

"Are you going to tell Temperance you love her?" Hank stood up and with the help of his cane, moved over to where his grandson was sitting. As he looked down, he placed his hand on the boy's shoulder. "Tell her Seeley."

"I can't Pops. She doesn't love me." Booth raised his arm and placed his hand over his grandfather's hand. "She doesn't believe in love. If I told her I love her, she might look for another partner, friendship or not. She's . . . she's complicated."

Hank shook his head and moved over to his bed. Sitting down on the edge, he sighed. "So are you, boy. So are you."

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