A/N: This chapter ended up being so long I had to split it into two chapters. So we'll have two more chapters after this. I'll also explain how much this chapter changed from original planning to actually writing it at the end. It's the only one that has had changes.
"We've got three guys out sick this week with the flu," Tank told me after roll call. We were walking back to my office after handing out the day's assignments.
"Did you call our contractors to get fill-ins?" I asked as I sat down at my desk. I winced slightly from the pain of a pulled muscle in my lower abdomen.
"It isn't my first fucking day," Tank replied. "Of course, I did. But I had to offer them double the normal pay for cover for the entire week. I was just letting you know that so you could approve it on payroll." He put the list of names on my desk and left the office.
"Fine," I said to his back, bringing up my email and sending the message out to accounting.
Things had been tense between us since I'd returned from Miami in mid-October. I had told him on the drive back from the airport about what had happened with Stephanie that past week. Before we had left Miami on Sunday, we had agreed that we were back together, but that we weren't going to rush one of us relocating just yet. We still had work to do and a child to consider. Tank had called me a fucking idiot for getting back together with her and I had told him that what decision I made with my personal life wasn't any of his fucking business. He didn't have to agree with it, but he could keep his thoughts to himself. We had hardly spoken since then, only when absolutely necessary and often through text or email.
I didn't like being on bad terms with him. We had never been this distant with each other, though our friendship had been more strained in the last few years. I felt guilty because I knew I hadn't been nearly as invested in what was going on with his life as he had been with mine. I didn't know if he had been dating anyone. I hadn't asked how his family was doing. I wanted to apologize for being a shitty friend and try to do better, but I knew he probably had more to say about Stephanie and I didn't want to hear it. What he couldn't seem to understand was just because I chose to forgive Stephanie and pursue a future with her didn't mean I was condoning what she had done. She knew it was wrong, and I wasn't pretending otherwise. We both knew there were scars on our relationship, but we chose not to let them be the only thing we focused on. Before we'd left Miami, she had asked me to read a book with her about relationships and I had agreed. We were doing the work, and I didn't need his opinion on it.
I sat through meetings in the morning with increasing discomfort in my abdomen. I had skipped breakfast that morning because I hadn't felt hungry. At first, I thought I just needed a trip to the bathroom, but nothing seemed to help. By my third meeting, I was feeling nauseous. Afterwards I took medication for it and wondered if I had food poisoning. It didn't seem likely, but not impossible either. Ella was fastidious in food safety, and I had only eaten things prepared by her or myself in the last few days. I decided to push through the day and hoped it would pass.
My afternoon was going to be spent going on patrol with a new hire, Paul Genoese. He had come Rangeman from the National Park Service a month ago, having been an investigator for the NPS for several years. He was originally from Philadelphia and had wanted to be closer to his extended family after years spent in Arizona and New Mexico. He was married and had three school-aged children.
I was guiding him through the routine of the patrols and wondering why the hell I was sweating so much. I took off my coat and cracked the window a little. If I didn't start feeling better soon, I was going to need to go back home. It wasn't until I went to get out of the car at a commercial account that I realized how bad the pain was. I doubled over as stepped out of the car and nearly lost my footing. A sharp pain was shooting through my lower abdomen. I got the feeling that what I had originally believed was a pulled muscle might be something else.
"Are you okay?" Paul asked as he walked around the car.
"I don't know," I admitted. It was mildly embarrassing to be showing weakness in front of a new employee, but the pain was so bad I couldn't care enough to lie. "I haven't been feeling well today and now I've got this sharp pain."
"Where is it?"
I pointed to my lower right abdomen and Paul grimaced. "That's not good," he said. "That sounds like your appendix."
"Oh fuck," I said. I tried to take a few steps, but the pain intensified, and I knew I wasn't going to make it far. I felt like I might vomit.
"Get me to a hospital," I said, getting back into the car.
Paul dropped me off at the emergency entrance and was headed back to the office to check in with Tank. I tried walking a few steps, but a nurse saw the difficulty and brought a wheelchair. After explaining my symptoms, I was taken back into the emergency room, bypassing a full waiting room.
I was taken into a triage area and given a hospital gown to put on. Undressing was a slow process because the pain seemed to be getting worse with every minute. When I was still half dressed after a few minutes, the nurse coming in to take my vitals stepped in and helped me finish.
I was asked when my symptoms had started and other medical questions as I tried not to vomit. I was given a small pan, but since I hadn't eaten all day, I just dry heaved. A nurse started an IV and a doctor came in a few minutes later to start pressing on my abdomen. The pain had me crying out when he hit the most sensitive spot.
"It's very likely appendicitis," he stated. "I'm going to send you off for some imaging, but I have little doubt you'll need surgery. I'm going to get that CT ordered and send someone in with something for your pain and the nausea in a minute."
I heard my phone ringing in a bag on the small table next to me, but I couldn't reach for it without making the pain ten times worse.
A nurse walked in fifteen minutes later with two syringes that she fed into the IV and told me that the doctor had ordered a CT scan. Given that I was nauseous and most likely going into surgery, I got to skip drinking the chalky shit and would be given IV contrast instead.
It took a few minutes, but the pain and nausea eased somewhat as the medicine kicked in. I had intended to find out who had called and to check in with Stephanie and Tank, but the medication I'd been given for the nausea was making me drowsy. I don't know how long I was like that, but I was awakened by the sound of someone calling me Ricardo. It was a young woman in her mid-twenties in blue scrubs.
"I'm here to take you down for your scan," she said. She grabbed the bag containing my clothes, shoes, and other belongings and put them on the end of the gurney.
"You'll most likely go to a different area after this, so we'll take your stuff along," the tech said as she wheeled me through the emergency room.
After what felt like a mile of nondescript hallways, I finally arrived at the location for my scan. I had to get off the gurney to get onto the machine and the gurney was pushed out of the room. I was positioned, told to lie still and given a second IV injection that made my mouth taste like I was sucking on pennies.
Once the scan was done and I had been wheeled back to a different exam room in the emergency department, I dozed off again. I needed to call people, but I couldn't keep my eyes open. Nurses would come in and check on me occasionally, each time telling me that the doctor would be in soon to talk to me. I wasn't sure how long it went on like that, but by the time the doctor finally walked in the nausea medication was wearing off.
"Okay, you definitely have appendicitis. I'm actually concerned that your appendix might have ruptured," the doctor said. "The surgeon is on her way, along with the anesthesiologist. They will be coming in as soon as they get here to get you ready."
I nodded and looked at the bag on the table next to me. "Can you give me my phone? I need to make some calls."
The doctor pulled out my phone and handed it to me. "If you need us to call anyone else, just let the nurses know."
My first call was to Stephanie. It was almost seven and she would be expecting me to call for our normal facetime with Stella.
"Hey, you're early," she said when she answered. "Stella's just finishing her bath."
"I won't be able to Facetime," I said. "I'm in the emergency room. I'm going to be having my appendix taken out tonight."
"Oh my God," she exclaimed. I heard Stella ask her what was wrong in the background.
"How long has this been going on?" she asked, ignoring our persistent child.
"I was having some pain this morning, but I thought I'd pulled a muscle working out last night. Then I started feeling nauseous, so I thought I'd eaten something bad. But then it got so bad while I was out on patrol with a new hire that I could hardly walk. I had him drop me off here," I said. "I think I got here around two, but I can't remember. I've been asleep from the medication they gave me."
"This sucks," she said. "I want to be there."
"Well, unless you've become a surgeon since the last time I saw you, I don't think there's much you can do," I said. "I'll have them call you when I get out of surgery to update you. I put you down as my emergency contact."
"Is anyone there with you?" I could hear the worry in her voice.
"No, you're my first call. I need to call Tank and make sure he gets things covered for at least the next couple of weeks. It goes without saying that I won't be making there for Thanksgiving. Is Katie still going to see her parents?"
"Yes, she is. Please your call your mother and have her be there," she said. "I don't want you going into surgery with no one at the hospital."
"I'll be fine," I reassured her. "I just hate the idea of you spending Thanksgiving alone."
"Stop worrying about me," she said, emphasizing each word. "You focus on getting better and calling your freaking mother."
"I don't want my mother here," I told her. "I haven't talked to her since August."
"I don't care, Ranger. I can't teleport from Indiana to get there in time before you go into surgery and I don't want you there alone. If you don't want your mother there then at least call Tank."
Stephanie didn't know about the issues between Tank and me, and I wasn't going to tell her now.
"Babe, I'll be okay," I told her. I knew she was scared. I remembered that helpless feeling of being hundreds of miles away from someone you loved when they were going into surgery. At least I didn't have Stella with me. "I love you. Just tell Stella I'm not feeling well, and I'll talk to her tomorrow. I don't want her to be scared."
"I love you too," she whispered. "Make sure they call me right away."
My next call was to Tank to tell him I'd be having surgery and to get things set up at the office to cover my absence for at least a couple of weeks. He asked if I needed anything and I just told him that I'd need Ella to pack a bag for me. I figured I would be released from the hospital the next day but needed a phone charger and a change of clothes. I didn't ask him to come to the hospital. I'd deal with Stephanie's frustration later, if she ever found out I had gone into surgery without anyone at the hospital.
It was another ninety minutes before I was wheeled into surgery. Both the surgeon and anesthesiologist had come in a little bit earlier and asked questions about my medical history, asked if I had ever had any other surgeries, and if I was allergic to any medications.
I had vague memories of waking up in the recovery room and dry heaving, but then drifting back off to sleep. I woke up at one point to find myself in a hospital room with a nurse standing over me. She was asking me if I was having any pain. I couldn't remember my answer. It felt like I was never going to wake up.
"How are you doing this morning?" the surgeon asked when she came in my room around eight-thirty. I had been awake for a little bit after a nurse had come into check my vitals.
"Better than I was," I replied.
"Good," she replied, reading through notes on an iPad. "I told you this last night, but most people say they can't remember much when they're coming out from the anesthesia, so I wanted to go over it again. Your appendix had ruptured by the time I got you into the OR. I had to open you up rather than use laparoscopic methods. The infection wasn't too badly spread through your abdominal cavity, but I did have to clean it out. There were no abscesses, but I still put a drain in to make sure you don't have any leftover infection. You're on IV antibiotics and I'm going to keep you here a couple of days for observation. The biggest concern with a ruptured appendix is sepsis, which is when you get infection in the bloodstream. If you seem to be doing okay, then I'll send you home in a couple of days with the drain and more antibiotics. You'll have the drain for a couple of weeks and then you'll follow up with me to have it removed. Recovery on this type of surgery is usually four or five weeks, which a little longer than laparoscopic."
She checked my incision and asked if I had any questions.
"Did you call my girlfriend last night?" I asked.
"Yes, Stephanie?" she asked, and I nodded. "I told her you came through surgery well. She had asked if anyone was here with you, and I told her not that I was aware of. She didn't sound happy about that. I think you might be in the doghouse."
"I knew I would be," I replied. "Thanks."
I didn't know where my stuff was but didn't have time to figure out as someone in brown scrubs and a hairnet brought in breakfast a couple of minutes after the doctor left. I had been given oatmeal, toast, some grapes, apple juice, and milk. I repositioned as best I could so that I could get started on breakfast. I was finally hungry after not eating all day yesterday, but ate slowly so I didn't throw up. The drain was uncomfortable, and I moved gingerly to avoid the pulling sensation. I'd had a drain before when I had been shot and they weren't fun.
I was about halfway through my breakfast when Stephanie walked through the door carrying Stella, who appeared to be wearing her pajamas under her coat. Both looked exhausted.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, almost not able to believe what I was seeing. Stephanie was in my hospital room in Trenton, only thirteen hours after I had called her from the emergency room.
"Are you okay, Daddy?" Stella asked meekly. I patted the bed on my left side and Stephanie placed her there. I put my arm around her and kissed her head.
"Hi, baby," I said. "I'm okay. The doctor took out my appendix so it wouldn't hurt anymore. I'm going all better really soon."
Stephanie sat down in a chair that was along the wall. "We can't stay long because Boston is out in the car losing his mind and I'm exhausted. But I wanted to stop and see you. I couldn't just sit home when I knew you were out here having surgery," she said. "As soon as I got off the phone with you, I started trying to find flights, but they were packed and the earliest we could get here would have been this evening. I finally decided to just drive, so I packed up our stuff, Stella, and the cat, and drove out here."
"You drove ten hours overnight by yourself with a four-year-old and a cat?"
"Like I said, I wanted to be here. I was worried you wouldn't ask anyone to be here when you got out of surgery and I was right," she said, giving me a stern look.
I took a minute to take her in and be in awe of her. This woman, who had nearly died in a car accident almost exactly one year earlier, who had been anxious about driving ever since, had packed up our child, their cat, and had driven over six hundred miles in the dark so that she could be with me after a ruptured appendix.
"I'm glad you're here," I told her. "But I'm also glad I didn't know you were coming. I would have been worried sick until you got here."
"I did a lot better than I would have ever thought possible," Stephanie said with a small smile. "I was so worried about you that it took my mind off the driving anxiety. Stella and Boston slept most of the way, so that helped. Katie kept calling me every hour to see how we were doing. I stopped a couple of times to take breaks and then I pulled over to take a nap at a gas station on the Pennsylvania turnpike around three-thirty. That little bit of sleep got me the rest of the way here."
She was running on adrenaline, and I knew she was going to crash soon.
"Can you check that drawer for my stuff?" I asked her, pointing to the nightstand next to my bed. She opened the drawer and pulled out my bag of clothes. I opened it up and found my housekeys.
"Take these and go back to my house," I told her. "Do you remember the address?"
"I have it in my phone."
"The code for the alarm is 3282941," I told her and she typed it into her phone. "I'll call Ella and tell her you're here. She'll probably stop by and see if you need anything."
Stephanie nodded and picked Stella up from the bed. "Do you need anything before we go?"
"I need you to get back to the house safely and get some sleep," I told her. "Ella is packing a bag for me, so I figure it'll be out here in a little while. If I need something I'll let her know."
She leaned down to kiss me. "I'll come back later after I've had some sleep," she said.
She promised to text when she got to the house and left with Stella waving at me over her mother's shoulder. I went back to my breakfast once they had left. The fact that Stephanie had put aside all her anxiety and her steadfast refusal to ever step foot in Trenton again to come out here because I was in the hospital made my chest tighten. I had been feeling good about things between us since October, but this was something different. I still hadn't been able to wrap my mind around it before Stephanie texted to say she had gotten to the house safely and that Ella had been there packing my bag when they arrived.
I passed the time watching television or sleeping until Ella showed up around eleven with a change of clothes, my phone charger, and iPad.
"Thanks, Ella," I said as she plugged the charger into the wall and connected my phone. "Did Stephanie get settled okay?"
"She did," Ella replied beaming. "I'm so glad she's here. I'm going back to the house after this to get Stella. I told Stephanie I would take her out to run errands with me while she got some sleep."
"That's good," I said. "Make sure she isn't overdoing while I'm not there. She pushes herself too hard."
"Hm," Ella said, putting a finger to her lips and looking up at the ceiling. "Who does that remind of? Certainly no one in this room."
"Don't be too hard on yourself, Ella. You can't help that you're a workaholic," I said, which made her laugh.
Stephanie came back to the hospital around dinner time to visit without Stella. She said Ella had made dinner and was going to stay at the house until she got back.
"How are you feeling?" she asked as she pulled the chair that was along the wall next to the bed.
"Not too bad," I said. "The drain is uncomfortable, but as long I have pain meds I'm okay. I'm really hoping I get to come home tomorrow."
"It'll take as long as it takes for you to get better," she said, clearly imitating something she had been told while she had been recovering. I reached over and she put her hand in mine.
"I still can't believe you're here," I told her. "I thought hell would have to freeze over before I would ever see you anywhere near Trenton."
Stephanie gave a small laugh. "I figured that too. I thought about it a lot when I was driving here, and how you told me I needed to stop giving so much weight to other peoples' opinions. I guess this is going to be a trial run to see how I do here. Maybe if I manage to get out of here without burning down a building or getting my car destroyed that means there's some hope for me after all."
We spent the next couple of hours talking about the holiday and the book we had been reading together. I asked how she was doing given that the anniversary of her accident would be on Friday. She said she was feeling okay about it, and that being together helped. If she had stayed in Indiana, it may have been a little harder.
"Thank you for coming here," I told her as she got up to leave. "I can't even begin to tell you how much it means to me."
"You came rushing out to Indiana this time last year to be with me. How could I not do the same for you?" she said, bending over to kiss me. I stole a glance down her shirt as she pulled away.
"Ugh, you'll be just fine," she said, smacking me lightly on the arm. I grinned unapologetically.
I was discharged from the hospital the morning of Thanksgiving. I had hoped to be out earlier, but the doctor had wanted to be sure I didn't have any fever for forty-eight hours after surgery. Stephanie and Stella were waiting for me at the pick-up area as a nurse wheeled me downstairs. I could see Stella bouncing excitedly in her car seat as Stephanie got out to help me into the passenger seat. The ride home had been uncomfortable on my wound, but I didn't complain as I reassured Stella that I was feeling okay and would be back to normal very soon.
I spent the day grateful that I had bought a couch with recliners on either end. It allowed me to be comfortable while I sat with Stella and watched a movie. Boston and Shadow had both tried to come up to me when I got home, then froze when they realized it would be a territorial match. Shadow decided he wasn't going to let the bigger stranger take over his home and jumped up on the arm of the couch to sit next to me. I put a pillow over my incision and the drain so that he couldn't step on it if he tried to get on my lap. Boston looked betrayed by me and wandered off to the kitchen where Stephanie was making Thanksgiving dinner.
"Are you sure you don't want to call your family and let them know?" Stephanie asked as she brought me a bottle of water and the prescription bottles for my pain medication and antibiotics.
"Do you want to call yours and tell them you're in town?" I asked.
We stared at each other for a few seconds, neither backing down. "I didn't just have surgery," she told me.
"You pretended to sleep when your mother visited you in the hospital," I replied.
Stephanie made a disgusted noise and headed back into the kitchen, knowing she didn't have a leg to stand on in her persistent efforts to get me to call my family. My parents began having Thanksgiving dinner on Fridays once their kids had started getting married because they had never wanted my siblings to have to choose between their house and their in-laws. This would be the first year I hadn't been there for dinner since I had been in the army. I felt guilty when I thought about my father, brother, and my other three sisters. I was still pissed at Silvia and hurt by my mother's inaction. I wasn't sure if Silvia would be there because she didn't always make it to Thanksgiving, but there would be no avoiding my mother.
When she had lived in Trenton, I had known Stephanie wasn't a good cook by any stretch of the imagination. After spending so much time with her in Indiana, I had discovered she had picked up some skills in the years since then. But this Thanksgiving meal really showed her progress. Everything was delicious, and I didn't think it was just because I'd been living on hospital food the last two days.
I tried to help her with a little bit of clean up, but she threatened to call my mother if I did anything other than sit on the the couch. Stella and I read books while Stephanie loaded the dishwasher and put leftovers away. I heard her cell phone ring around seven-thirty.
"Oh, look who it is," she said, showing me the display on her phone. It was my mother calling.
"Please don't answer," I begged. She swiped the screen and took the call, walking away from the living room as she greeted my mother. I knew she would tell her about my surgery because doing otherwise would require outright lying. My mother undoubtedly would want to know if I was in Indiana with her as she came up on the anniversary of her accident and would want to know how Stella was doing. I caught parts of their conversation as I continued to read to Stella.
"She wants to talk to you," Stephanie said, holding her phone out to me. "Stella, let's go get ready for bed."
I counted to three before I put the phone up to my ear. "Hi, Mom."
"How are you feeling?" she asked, the concern clear in her voice.
"I'm fine. I've got a drain in and I'm on enough antibiotics to wipe out my gut biome."
"I wish you would have called me," she said quietly. "I would have been at the hospital with you."
I didn't respond to that. That had been the entire point.
"Carlos, can I come visit you tomorrow after we finish dinner? I've missed you, and I'd like to see Stephanie and Stella. I know your father does too."
"I don't care if you come down to visit them," I said.
"I owe you an apology," she said. "I've been trying to call you to do it, but you weren't answering. I should have just come down there."
I didn't say anything to that but waited for her to continue.
"I'm sorry I didn't say anything to Silvia when she was talking to you like that," she said. "You were right that I've always been so afraid of her walking away again that I let her do whatever she wants. But last month she called me and was complaining about you not talking to any of us and I let her have it. You hadn't spoken to me in two months and it was because I had refused to stand up to her and I made that clear. She got angry with me and told me she wasn't coming to dinner tomorrow. I told her that was her choice and that we would see her when she got over herself."
"It's about time," I told her.
"I know," she sighed. "I just look at her and still see an angry, pregnant teenager because she's never really matured beyond that point. I shouldn't be sacrificing my relationships with the rest of you because of her."
I talked to my mother for a few more minutes while Stephanie got Stella into pajamas. I would reserve judgment on whether my mother could maintain this confidence in putting Silvia in her place until I could see it happen for myself. We made plans for her to come down the following evening.
"See, that wasn't so hard, was it?" Stephanie asked once I had handed her the phone.
"No, it wasn't too bad," I said, reaching for my own phone. "We'll call your mother now."
"No!" Stephanie exclaimed, snatching my phone away. "Your mother called me, that's different."
"Not that much different," I told her. "You need to talk to your mother while you're here."
"I'm not saying that I won't. I just don't want to do it right now," she said.
"I'm going to hold you to that," I promised. And I kept my promises.
A/N: I wrote the original outline for this story in December 2018 and it hasn't really changed except for this chapter. The intent of the chapter has stayed the same: Ranger is forced to stay in Trenton at Thanksgiving, which leads Stephanie to go to him and face her fears of her going back home. But the reasons leading those circumstances that have changed drastically because when I originally outlined this story, we were still a year away from the first appearances of what is now known as COVID-19. In the original outline, there was a particularly virulent flu going around the tri-state area that was shutting down schools and businesses due to short staffing and the desire to reduce the spread. Rangeman was hit very hard (which forced Ranger to stay in Trenton) and that lead to major changes in the office. I was having people work from home, social distancing and wearing face masks before those were things in our everyday vernacular, and hoarding sanitizer long before we were doing it in real life. It was actually kind of chilling to read what I had planned so long ago compared to what we have been living through. Having no desire to put us all through that again, I went with Ranger being sick and I honestly find it much better than the flu story line would have ever been.