Dear Diary,

Is there a thing as to perfect? Or that you wish things to be different, and your wish comes true? And even if you like it, you wish for the old to come back?

I snapped at Cat Noir today, and he gave up his Miraculous. I didn't mean to snap at him. Just the stress of Cat Blanc makes me tired and scared and sometimes I snap. It has never been my intention to hurt him, or make him feel replaceable.

After I found the ring, I went back home where I had a long discussion with the Kwamis. If Cat Noir was gone, then I needed to find a new holder. I gave the ring to Plagg, trusting it to be in good hands.

So, I was surprised when a new Cat Noir showed up on patrol tonight, though his name isn't Cat Noir. His name is Cat Walker. Usually on patrol, we don't end up fighting akumas or Sentimonsters, but tonight is different.

He was handsome, with a black and gray suit with little paw prints all over it. Green eyes like Cat's with with greenish hair that he wears in a small ponytail. I don't why, but I ended up meowing at him. How embarrassing. I guess I'm lucky I didn't fall down. Meowing is cuter anyway….

His voice was smooth as silk and gentle. Cat's voice is playful...Oh. I was so distracted by this new hero he was rather handsome, but something was off. Then I realized it. He's not my Cat Noir.

Luckily, he seemed to be a good fighter. Giving me advice and luring the Sentimonster cat away. At first I thought Kitty had been akumatized and I froze. I never want that to happen again. I want to protect him.

Cat Walker told me he was going to take care of me, and I felt a wave of peace wash over me. When was the last time that has happened? We're I felt utter peace as I placed my hand in his, his hand slightly rough from the material of the suit, but reassuring as well.

My lucky charm was a picnic blanket. I looked around and my eyes kept landing on Cat Walker. He reminds me of Cat, or being I'm just missing my Kitty.

There haven't been many battles that he hasn't been by my side, so it feels strange and empty without him here. I realize how much I love Cat Noir, and even if I cannot be in love because I don't want the world to end, I feel a different kind of love. Laughter and giggles and close moments fill my head, causing me to blush. I can tell my secret to you, Diary. I love him.

You don't appericate what you have until there gone. For me, that is Cat Noir, my Kitten. Cat Walker may be a good fighter and he could be my friend, but he's not Cat Noir.

Does Cat Walker notice how many times I've said his name? Each time I say it, he gives me advice and somehow I keep a level-head.

I feel off at the end of the battle. No pound it, just a "we did it!" moment. Oh, Cat. Whenever you are, your Ladybug needs you.

Next day at sunset he shows up and even if I'm so glad to see him, we have to have a talk. "Just because I don't need you all the time, doesn't me I'm replacing you. Your irreplaceable." We sit quite close our shoulders almost touching. The words "I love you" stick in my throat, but if I say them, I might cry.

I need to change, to be quiet and listen, to be a friend when he has questions. He's always been there for me from the very start, I have to a change of heart.

Is everything back to normal? I don't know, things like this take time. Deep breath, Ladybug. You need to gentle, he needs your love now more then ever.

Though I have seen certain changes. Him being less flirty with me, and trying to be a gentleman. What do I want? A partner calm and cool like Cat Walker, and funny and warm like Cat Noir? Or maybe a combination of the two? Strange, when I close my eyes I see Adrien.

I need to be watchful, for Shadow moth could once again get his hands on the Miraculous. I realize something. I lost sleep having to find a new Cat Noir, when I wanted the old one all along.

I had to be strong and not let me tears flow after he was gone. Everything may not be perfect, but we're working on it. He's always asking me to the movies, should I say yes? I smile to myself, it could be fun.

I close my eyes and think back to the day when Cat took me to the movies as Marinette. It had been awhile since I opened up like that. And….I really enjoyed it.

Tikki is on the corner of my bed, watching me. I glance at the clock. Should I call Cat Noir, so we can hang out? I know its dark out, but I need to be with my Kitty, wanting to feel his arms around me, protecting me. Oops, sorry, Diary. That was a tear that just splashed onto the page. I want to ring Cat's little gold bell, which is adorable on him.

It the little things you don't notice until you don't have them anymore. Soon, I will close these pages for I want to call Cat, and have a chat. Hmm, maybe Starbucks will be open?

Though I'm glad Cat is back, I will miss Cat Walker. He was a gentleman and like a prince. Goodnight, my diary, until tomorrow. Getting these thoughts down on paper really helps to calm me.

Now to say "Spots on!" and find my Kitty. I spent enough time away from him.

Marinette Dupain-Cheng

-Ladybug