The Novelization of Super Mario Bros. USA
Chapter 3
"Help me! Help me, Mario!" A voice screamed from outside alongside the echoing sound of Birdo's eggs soaring through the air. Mario, Luigi, Toad, and the Princess listened intently as the Hawk's Mouth closed behind them. "Do you hear that?" Toad asked. "Yes, someone needs our help!" The Princess replied. Mario looked up. The four of them were inside a small room with a ladder leading to a second level with a door, which was where the cries for help were coming from. "Well let's find the clog, what do you say, Luigi?" But Luigi had already placed a hand on the ladder. He changed a bit over the past three worlds, and by now, here in the third Level of Subcon World Four, Luigi was taking more initiative, emboldened by his brother's leadership. "You betcha, Mario." Luigi nodded.
Mario, Luigi, Toad, and the Princess exited the doorway from a snow-covered hillside. Birdo stood ready for them, several yards away. She threw her arms out and breathed in before spitting a large oval-shaped egg in their direction. The four scattered to dodge, none of which were phased. By now, all of them had become used to her species' attacks. Beyond Birdo, however; was a downed Subcon. She was laying with her back against the snow and a look of terror across her face. "Help me! Please! She's trying to kill me!" The Subcon screamed. The Princess landed nearby, watching everything unfold. Something didn't feel right to her. Mario dashed forward, meeting Birdo face to face, before reaching out his hand and squeezing her snout shut.
"Well, that battle went quick." Toad said as he walked forward with Luigi by his side. Birdo flailed her tiny arms desperately as her eyes watered. "You're safe now," Mario said, looking past Birdo at the downed Subcon. "What's your name?" He asked. "Karyme" she responded, blinking her pretty eyes. Karyme stood up now, brushing the snow off her robes and spreading her beautiful wings. "You're welcome to join us, Karyme. We've embarked on a quest to overthrow Wart," Luigi said, kindly, but bluntly. "You're the first Subcon that we've seen in this entire world that hasn't been under Wart's spell," Peach added in a suspicious tone. The other three went quiet as the conversation now turned awkward. "There are very few of us left." Karyme tearfully responded. She paused for a moment, as if to collect her thoughts, and then added, "I can get you over this water. I have some friends that can help us too." She held a hand up to her mouth innocently.
The four looked beyond Karyme to find that the snow and earth had stopped abruptly at a cliff, with icy cold waters taking their place. Given the fog and constant flurries, one or all the four might have fallen into the dangerously cold waters if not for Karyme's offer. Without thinking, Mario cast Birdo to the side. She tumbled through the snow, bumping into rocks and jagged earth on her way before coming to a rest. Mario wasn't normally this callous, but Wart's enemies were getting on his nerves. Most of Bowser's troops were lawful-evil, unlike the Shyguys, Snifits, Tweeters, and Hoopsters of this world. In fact, Mario recalled a level of respect that he and Bowser's army had shared amongst each other, whereas the enemies of Subcon were cunning and sociopathic.
"Alright, I'll bite. How do we cross this water?" Mario asked. One of Birdo's eggs narrowly missed his face and soared across the crashing waves. Karyme held up both fingers like guns and winked, as if to say, "Bingo." Everyone now understood, except for Birdo, who fired off a barrage of eggs in their direction. Each of the four hopped on an egg, utilizing it to transverse the icy waters. Karyme followed, flying alongside them. "Thanks, Karyme." Toad said. "Anything for you guys," Karyme responded with difficulty. Her feminine voice changed mid-sentence into a deep manly voice, before returning to its original tone by the end of her statement. Luigi did a double-take, asking, "Are you ok?" Karyme blushed, saying, "I'm fine!" Peach raised an eyebrow in hearing this, but all their attention was diverted to the three large brick buildings that they were quickly approaching.
A red brick roadway was fastened to the side of the first building. Three figures could be seen standing on it—two riding Autobombs and one creature that was hovering. Another brick roadway connected the second and third buildings. Each roadway was around twenty feet wide with solid construction. It appeared as if Subcon was building this roadway to connect all the buildings to the landmass from which the five of them were coming. "Those are my friends!" Karyme exclaimed excitedly. "Any help is good at this point," Toad remarked. "Maybe we can all set up camp inside one of those buildings and take a break," Luigi said. "And make a nice lasagna?" Mario asked, smirking. "Something doesn't feel right here, Mario," Peach blurted out.
Mario, Luigi, Toad, and Princess Peach stepped off their flying eggs and descended to the roadway below. Karyme's shadow flew over them, never landing. The three beings slowly turned around, realizing that they had company. The first entity was a Tweeter. He reached down and pulled a lever that caused his Autobomb to gradually turn around and face the four. The second entity revealed herself to be a Porcupo. She too wheeled her Autobomb around to meet the cast head-on. The Autobombs were slightly modified from the others they'd seen, with both having a steering wheel, various levers, and a seat installed. The third entity hovered above the two Autobomb operators revealing himself to be a Beezo. "Mario Brothers," The Beezo stated solemnly, addressing the entire group. A medallion with stamped text that read, "Beezo; Job Class: Ranger; Rank: Sergeant." hung from Beezo's neck.
"You tricked us…" Peach stated angrily, staring at Karyme, who landed behind the Beezo and two Autobombs. Unexpectedly, Wart appeared behind Karyme and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Evidentially, I misjudged the four of you," Wart stated. None of Wart's soldiers moved when he spoke, including Karyme. "You've overthrown half of my forces," Wart continued, his voice a bit stressed, but conveying power and authority. "We're working our way towards you, be patient," Luigi replied calmly. "Luigi, just stop," Toad chuckled, trying to hold in his laughter. "We're not going to stop," Mario interrupted, staring up at Wart. "The closer you get to my castle, the tougher my soldiers will become," Wart explained. "I offer you the chance to join us. The Dream Machine can offer you anything that you desire," Wart continued.
"But I work in Brooklyn," Luigi blurted out in an intentionally stupid sounding and comedic manner. Peach and Toad burst out laughing. Mario closed his eyes for a moment and said, "Wart, we don't want to work for you. In fact, your own people don't want to work for you. You just haven't figured that out yet." Wart turned and used his claw to draw and doorway beside him. There was no physical door, but the world behind that tall and rectangular entrance flashed with brilliant colors. "Have it your way, Mario Brothers," Wart said, stepping through the doorway and disappearing. Beezo and the Autobomb operators relaxed their shoulders and became animated again. "It's time, Mario Brothers," Beezo stated, holding up a tall, forked weapon upside down. Twitter and Porcupo swiveled their Autobomb barrels towards the party members. Karyme took off running down the roadway towards the first building's door. "Peach don't let her get away; we'll handle the mid-boss!" Mario shouted.
"Oh, will you?" Beezo planted his forked weapon into the pavement. Lightning crackled across the sky and the weather instantly became overcast. "Direct!" Peach leaped overtop the soldiers and pursued Karyme into the doorway. "Everybody, listen! They specialize in ranged attacks! Dodge and move in to attack! Get ready!" Mario shouted. A flat diamond-shaped piece appeared over the front of Beezo's weapon, and he began to emit a golden aura. "I don't have a good feeling about this," Toad raised his eyebrows. Both Autobomb engines revved, letting off thick clouds of smoke behind them. "Mario, I would have gone after her," Luigi vented. The diamond-shaped piece on the front of Beezo's weapon now opened apart in panels, revealing four globular pieces within. "Peach can take care of herself; I need you to focus!" Mario responded. Beezo readied his One-Shot Kill Move, shouting, "VOLTEKKA!" The combined globular pieces unleashed a ray beam of light toward the party of three. Both Autobombs fired in unison.
Peach ascended three icy platforms before dodging a Flurry. She then stopped to catch her breath on a fourth platform, only to narrowly miss another charging Flurry. She watched her Exhaled Breath Condensate for a moment, now realizing how cold this building was. "Punking out on me already?" Karyme's voice echoed from above. "Is this building filled with chains and spikes too? Is that some weird obsession you all share in these parts?" Peach responded in a snarky tone. "Oh, I'm sorry, I forget. You were hoping for lava and a drawbridge, weren't you, Princess?" Karyme replied. Peach ascended more icy blocks, grabbing up a Flurry in her path. Despite being captured, it continued to quickly move its little skates, much like a dog dreaming about chasing a cat. Peach looked up, observing Karyme just ahead. She threw the Flurry into Karyme, who flew backward into the wall and let out a painful cry. "Serves you right," said Peach as she reached Karyme's platform, but the little Subcon quickly fluttered above her. "Your momma so poor, the ducks throw bread at her!" Karyme shouted.
Peach angrily retorted, "Your momma is so lazy, she has a stay-at-home job and is still late to work!" Karyme spiraled in circles towards the ceiling, saying, "Your momma is so dumb she sold her car to get gasoline money!" Peach leaped over two Flurries and ascended further, asking, "What's a car?" Karyme paused, unsure how to respond, and then stated, "Oh, that's right. You aren't from the real world." Peach grabbed up a Flurry, and went higher up, now staring over a bed of spikes. "There we go. What do you guys do? Have a Shyguy come in and decorate the place with this stuff?" Karyme, who was now standing atop an icy platform that levitated over the spikes, attempted to answer, but Peach lobbed the Flurry into her. As a result, she was thrown off the platform onto one below. Peach advanced higher now, stating, "Two hits? You must be a strong one." Karyme slowly got up and brushed off her shoulders, before making a beeline toward Peach. "I'm not the one that got captured by a turtle and needed a man to save me!" She threw a punch, contacting Peach's cheek. The Princess held her face and fled upwards, sidestepping a flurry. Karyme gave chase.
Beezo spun his forked weapon and flew backward as the party of three advanced. Each of them was cut, bruised, and burned. Tweeter wheeled his damaged Autobomb around and shot off a fireball that narrowly missed Toad. Mario dashed forward, throwing punch after punch at Beezo, each time missing by less and less of a distance. Luigi sidestepped Porcupo's Autobomb and kicked it in the side, causing metal gears and sprockets to fly upwards. Below them, the bricked pavement was coming apart. "You fight well!" said the Sergeant, who retreated into the air, just out of the three's reach. "We're not done here!" replied Mario, who was staring up at him. "You're right. One way or another, one of us won't be leaving," said Beezo as he placed his forked weapon in front of him. Bricks and pavement began to come off the bridge below him and fly up into the air. The diamond shape appeared over the front of the weapon once more, with its panels opening and revealing the glassy and globular pieces within. Beezo glowed bright yellow, readying to spam his One-Shot Kill Move.
Peach burst through a door that opened to the building's rooftop. Lightning brightly lit the sky and thunder crackled. A brick road connected this building to the second where she was, with a door on the other side. Peach looked over the side of the building, watching the ongoing fight below. Karyme entered the rooftop shortly thereafter, more composed. "Hey, I thought you were chasing me, not the other way around?! What are you even doing up here—" Karyme's voice changed mid-sentence, now sounding as if ten men were speaking each word. She stopped to catch herself. Peach turned around and looked at her, asking, "What ARE you?!" Karyme was silent for a moment, obviously hurt. She then responded slowly, every other word sounding as if a crowd of men was speaking all at once: "If you want me so bad, then you will have to catch me." Karyme soared through the air, crashing through the next doorway. Peach followed her through the door, which was now crooked and hanging off its hinge. Explosions could be heard below, where the fight lingered on.
Peach's momentum caused her to slide off the icy platform beyond the door and plummet through the building's levels below. She found herself rapidly descending, side by side with Karyme. "Let's see how strong you really are!" Karyme accomplished a somersault in mid-air, allowing her to grab a passing Starman. Her clothing immediately began to sparkle and glow with the familiar aura that the group was accustomed to. Peaches eyes widened in disbelief. Suddenly, a broken and digitized voice spoke to her telepathically, "TThat was sssuposed to be for youuu." Peach had never heard this voice before and looked around, trying to find the source. Karyme reached out, trying to hug Peach with hands that were full of Starman's electricity. "What are you looking for? I'm right here, Princess," Karyme said, her voice having trouble once more. The two landed on an icy platform with a door. Karyme charged toward Peach, but the Princess dodged and entered the doorway.
Beezo breathed heavily. He was down on one knee, with his wings spread and still clutching the forked weapon. Both Autobombs were overturned and on fire, with their operators no longer present. Mario, Luigi, and Toad now surrounded Beezo. The Sergeant caught his breath and slowly rose with his robes rippling in the stormy weather. None of the three had managed to so much as scratch him; however, they had worn him down. "I won't go down without a fight," Beezo mumbled, holding the forked weapon up in front of him once again. The diamond-shaped piece materialized into place. "You did, Sergeant. You fought like hell, but it's over. I don't think you have the energy to use that ray beam of yours anymore," Mario stated, calmly.
He was right. Beezo's One-Shot Kill Move had consumed all his life force. The forked weapon fell from his hand, and he collapsed onto the pavement. Sparkles began to rise off his robes and wings, ascending into the air. "My time is almost up," Beezo said as a familiar wind rushed in. The party knelt beside him. "Can I help you up, Sergeant?" Mario asked. "No…I'll just stay here," Beezo said, exhausted. He slowly turned his face towards Mario and stated, "Your friend is in grave danger."
Peach found herself in a long icy hallway and stopped to catch her breath. Karyme lie ahead, grounded, and standing between her and the Hawk's mouth at the other end. "Peach, I haven't had this much fun in a while," Karyme smiled brightly. At that moment, the broken and digitized voice spoke to Peach again, "AAAre you listening to mmmee?" A lightning bolt flashed across Karyme's eyes as she realized something was wrong. "Who are you?" Peach said softly, not knowing whom to address. "III am the DDDDream machine," the voice responded, each word having inappropriate pitches and tones. "WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO?!" Karyme yelled, flustered and paranoid. "Karyme is not what she seems. YYYou will have to fight for your LLLife. I will ggguide you," The voice spoke once more. Peach nodded. Karyme pulled a black mask from within her Subcon robes. The Hawk's mouth gradually opened behind her.
Suddenly, Peach's silky gloves were replaced with Kevlar ones; a turn-out coat materialized over her torso; boots took the place of her heels; an air mask appeared over her face and an oxygen bottle fastened to her backside; a Cairns 1010 firefighter helmet adorned her head. "LLListen cLosely. I haven't much tiMe," the Dream Machine said. Peach nodded again. Her heart was racing, and her adrenaline was pumping. Each breath was audible. A bead of sweat slid off her cheek inside the mask. Peach watched Karyme closely. "I'm not myself. I don't want to do this, Peach," tears filled Karyme's eyes. "I'm all messed up. I'm a monster," Karyme added. Small embers and bits of fire began to ascend from her robes. "I know this may be hard for you to understand right now, but you're under a spell," The Princess responded, her voice muffled due to the breathing apparatus. "You're a strong woman, Super Peach," Karyme said before solemnly turned towards the Hawk's mouth and disappearing within. Peach followed.
Beyond the Hawk's mouth lie a great drop. Peach and Karyme descended alongside one another. The two studied each other as they fell several stories. Karyme placed the black mask over her face and fire instantly engulfed her entire body. Peach's eyes widened in terror. Karyme's figure was no longer discernable, rather, it was overtaken by what turned into a large floating entity of red and yellow flames. The temperature quickly shot up to 1,300 degrees. Even with the suit, Peach could still feel the heat. She touched down in a concrete room with several platforms and Mushroom Blocks. The fiery entity hovered high above her, having now reached a size comparable to that of Bowser. "I am Fryguy, the General of World Four," Karyme stated, her voice now reaching its full glory, sounding like a group of men speaking each word. The temperature continued to rise, now reaching 1500 degrees.
Peach placed a gloved hand on a melting Mushroom Block but was interrupted by the Dream Machine's telepathic and distorted voice: "SSStop fighTIng, start TTThinking." Fryguy descended towards Peach as she placed her hand in front of her mask to shield the heat. "III haven't Much timE," The Dream Machine said. Peach backed away as Fryguy neared her, his heat causing her turnout gear to darken. "AAlthough Subcon is diFFerent from yoUr world, SSome things are UUniversal. Heat rises. FFire consumes oXXygen," the Dream Machine added, before going completely silent. Perhaps the machine had crashed, or Wart caught it helping her. At any rate, Peach was on her own now. Fryguy met her face to face, the room's temperature reaching 1700 degrees. The thermal liner of her gear was quickly reaching its limits. "There is no fighting me," Fryguy stated, each word a painful conglomeration of different men speaking.
"I don't need to fight you to win this battle," Peach said confidently. She lowered to her knees to reach the coolest area of the room, although that temperature was now 1900 degrees. Her suit had just about reached its limit. Fryguy became larger now, blinding her with his magnificent flames. "You're finished. You can't even stand up," Fryguy laughed. "No, I can't, but there is one difference between the two of us," she said calmly. The leather piece on the front of her helmet burst into flames. "What's that, little one?" Fryguy asked, now hovering into her. "Oxygen," Peach said weakly before crying out in agony as the heat scalded and seared her skin. "Nani?!" Fryguy stopped dead in his tracks. This fiery being of brilliant light and searing heat quickly burnt up and faded out like a match. The temperature plummeted and Karyme was left in Fryguy's place, levitating in thin air. Her eyes were closed and her entire Subcon body was charred. She fell lifelessly to the concrete floor.
A melody played in the distance with a door suddenly appearing in the room. The bricks that sealed up the ceiling vanished, releasing the heat, and causing the temperature to plummet. Peach's suit disappeared and was replaced by her normal attire. She knelt and picked up Karyme, who was lifeless. Peach began to cry and rubbed Karyme's face against her own. "Karyme no…please…don't go," She pleaded. A breeze began to circulate about the room. Peach tightened her hold onto the Subcon fairy, angrily yelling, "No! Just let me hold her. Please!" Mario, Luigi, and Toad now descended upon the room. "We followed your path of mangled Flurries," said Mario. "We're so glad you're alright," Luigi joined in. "What happened here?" asked Toad. Peach lifted her face off Karyme and watched as she turned into sparkles and went with the wind. "I learned that I am a strong woman," she answered.
Author's Notes:
Beezo's weapon was a tribute to Tekkaman Blade.