A/N: Hello readers, I have to apologize for how long it's been since I last updated this story, I hadn't realized the last update came in 2021. I know I've previously informed you all that I've been working two jobs, but I've also been dealing with burnout. I've been taking care of my mother that is recovering from an accident and dealing with my father who seems to be showing early onset dementia. I've gotten no help from any of my siblings and felt like I've been drowning. The depression hasn't helped any and there are times where I can barely drag myself from my bed. I hope that as my mother heals from her accident that life won't feel quite so overwhelming.

Any mistakes in this brief update are my own, I wrote this chapter last night and I apologize if it seems choppy or disjointed. Writing fanfiction is one of the only guilty pleasures I allow myself anymore and some of the new stuff that I've been trying to write has all been on my phone. And we all know how much autocorrect loves to make us look like blithering idiots at times.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy this update and I'll probably be posting an update to one of my other stories here sometime soon.

I will warn readers though that I have put some course language in this chapter as well as described some of the abuse that Alan endured. If you find the content triggering, then don't read. You have been warned.

Sad-Blue-Eyed-Angel 2010

Jeff held his breath as he listened to the voicemails he'd saved from Alan's old phone. He'd turned the messages over to the police, pressing charges after asking Alan if that was what he wanted. Originally, he hadn't wanted any part of it but then after some time thinking about it and talking with each of his brothers, he was encouraged to 'do the right thing'. Even Octavia had agreed to Alan pressing charges, if not for them than for himself. If Trevor was found guilty, which Jeff was positive he would be held accountable for his offenses; he felt that would give Alan more power over his life.

XXXXX

Alan had been a little more like his old self in the weeks since his return from hell with Trevor. He'd been timid when Virgil went in to go see the younger and it'd been unlike Alan to shy away from any contact. Virgil figured it was a carryover from his time spent with Trevor and the years of abuse he endured. Virgil didn't hold it against Alan. He knew the younger wasn't always like this and wouldn't stay like this.

"Hey kiddo. How are you doing?" Virgil asked as he walked over to sit in front of Alan at the foot of his bed.

"I'm doing okay. I still find myself expecting to have Trevor show up even though I know it's unlikely."

"Don't forget, he doesn't know where we live. I think you're perfectly safe here." Virgil said before he held his hand out and put the new phone in Alan's hand. "I hope you don't mind, but I took the liberty of changing your number and replacing your broken phone. I've already transferred your old pictures and most of your contacts with the exception of a select few."

"You didn't have to do that but thank you." Alan said with a small grin. "I appreciate all that you've been doing to make everything easier. And thank you for getting me out of there."

"Think nothing of it. I know you'd have done the same thing if I'd been in your shoes. I just wished I'd known sooner. Feels wrong that none of us had a clue and we hadn't acted earlier." Virgil said as he watched Alan suck in as deep a breath as he could manage.

"I wanted to tell you guys, I really did…but I was terrified that none of you would believe me." Alan said as he looked outside the room, through the windows at the horizon. "I often wonder how long I could have lasted if I hadn't called you. But then I feel like it wouldn't have been much longer."

"It's better to not think like that. You're safe and now it's time to pick up the pieces of your life. Dad was wondering about when we should take you in to get your teeth taken care of."

"Oh great, my first trip to the outside since my escape and it's to the dentist…I'm so excited." Alan replied wryly before he gave a shrug. "I suppose whenever it works with dad's schedule. It's not like I've got a job to schedule around."

"Ok, well I'll relay that to dad and we'll let him set the date." Virgil said before he reached out and ruffled Alan's hair like old times and was pleased that his little brother didn't flinch away from his touch.

XXXXX

Gordon woke up, his nose crinkling. He could smell something he hadn't smelled in a long time. It pulled him from a sound sleep and the aquanaut slowly sat up. He rubbed at his eyes, raising his other arm to check his watch, and groaned when he saw it was two in the morning. It wasn't normal for him to be up so early unless he was on a rescue. So, what was that he was smelling?

He glanced around and his gaze turned to his French door which he'd left open because there was a nice breeze when he'd gone to bed. Standing from his bed, Gordon went to look out his door and there he found Alan, sitting with his knees drawn to his chest holding a lit cigarette in his fingers. Finding that picture odd, Gordon opened his door further and stepped outside.

Alan didn't notice that Gordon had joined him on the shared balcony and so he visibly jumped when Gordon spoke.

"Since when did you take up smoking?" Gordon asked, not even appearing fazed when his little brother almost jumped out of his skin. It took the younger a moment to gather what he wanted to say, before he lifted his head.

"I don't smoke…I started just lighting them and sitting outside so I could have an excuse to be away from Trevor." Alan explained as he flicked the filter of his cigarette to knock the ashes off.

"Well Al, I'd like to believe you right now, but Trevor is not here and so I can't quite understand why you'd feel the need to light up." Gordon said as he sat with his back on the opposite wall, so he was facing his brother.

"I had a nightmare that I was back in that hellhole, woke up thinking Trevor was about to kill me…I needed to ground myself and the smell of cigarette smoke makes me think of papa – papa was strong, and he taught dad everything there was about strength, being a man. Papa wasn't afraid of anything."

Gordon drew up short, seeing the logic in Alan's actions. Their grandfather was a strong man, no nonsense. Smoked until the day he died, and Gordon always remembered their grandfather smelling like cigarette smoke. He could see why Alan was doing what he was doing. But he couldn't understand why Alan was still tortured by the nightmares. It had now been two weeks since Alan got home and he had his moments where he acted almost normal, like he hadn't been involved in an abusive living arrangement. But then there were times, such as now that showed Alan still hadn't recovered from his ordeal. Gordon watched Alan flick the filter of his cigarette again without taking a drag and believed Alan that he hadn't taken up smoking. Pushing up to a crouch, Gordon maneuvered until he was sat next to Alan, and he licked both his thumb and forefinger before squeezing the end of Alan's cigarette. Alan didn't say anything about Gordon extinguishing his attempt at grounding himself, but if he flinched when Gordon pulled him into a hug…Gordon wasn't the first to point it out. As Gordon sat with Alan, he couldn't help but to recall his visit to see Alan a little over a month prior.

Gordon grinned as he walked up the sidewalk. He'd had to park a couple blocks away due to the lack of parking spaces available. Gordon glanced up at the apartment complex and raised his eyebrows. Personally, he thought Alan could have found a better place to live than this hovel; but the kid didn't want their father's help financially and wanted to live 'like normal people'. Gordon hadn't announced his intention to visit, and he couldn't wait to see the look on Alan's face.

Putting his hands in his pockets, Gordon climbed the stairs, until he came to a stop at apartment 56. He raised his fist to knock when he heard it.

"What the hell is your problem?!" Gordon picked up that being Alan's voice.

"What do you mean, what's my problem? You're my problem!"

"I never asked for this! I was going to get my own place, but you wouldn't give it a rest! You kept hounding me until I caved!"

"I thought you'd be a good roommate!" Apparently, Trevor was giving Alan lip.

"I AM a good roommate, you're the sorry excuse for a roommate! I cook, I clean, I wash the laundry while you…you just drink the day away and screw the next thing that walks by!"

Gordon stayed quiet as he continued listening to the argument between Alan and Trevor. It sounded like the two were back away from the door, maybe the living room? Gordon could only hear the arguing. He wished he was a fly on the wall so he could see what was going on.

"I'm tired of the way you treat me! You're lucky I don't sue your ass!" Alan yelled and even Gordon could tell it was true genuine anger. He'd always been able to distinguish between Alan's irritation and his genuine anger. As he turned away, the argument already having gone more than twenty minutes that Gordon began feeling awkward just standing there. He walked away with a lack of the excitement he had when he arrived.

But had he just stood there a few more minutes, he'd have been there when Alan cried out followed by a loud bang as Alan was knocked to the ground. As Gordon came back from his memory, he pulled Alan just a little bit closer. He felt like he'd failed Alan in leaving that day, he didn't know all of what Alan faced when he was at the mercy of Trevor, but if he ever learned of it – he feared not even the strongest of his brothers could hold him back from tearing Trevor limb from limb for daring to lay a hand on his brother. You mess with one Tracy, you messed with them all.

XXXXX

Later that week, Jeff and Alan both walked into their family dentist's office. Alan kept his mouth shut and spoke the bare minimum allowed because he felt embarrassment at how bad his teeth were. He knew he'd needed to follow up sooner, but before he got away from his situation that just wasn't feasible. Trevor never would have allowed him to even leave the apartment unless he had good reason such as going to get beer or dinner. If it was Alan trying to go to work or anywhere else, he got a fist in either his face or gut for daring to do anything remotely normal.

Alan still blames himself for getting in that situation and on occasion believes that he deserved what he got. John had urged Alan to seek therapy the first time he heard Alan say that and he backed up his reasoning with articles describing a type of PTSD known as "battered person syndrome" or more commonly known as battered woman syndrome. Alan tried not to focus too much on the little robot that followed him around the house, one of Brain's inventions. If Alan started talking to it, it'd talk avidly about whatever Alan asked it. It even followed Alan to the bathroom, much like a cat or dog and brought up the e-articles on a holographic screen for Alan to read from. Alan denied everything until he started reading the articles on the holo-screen while he went to soak in the tub. As he read some of the attributing signs of "battered person syndrome", Alan felt like a stone dropped into the pit of his stomach. He may not recognize the signs himself, but he recalled each member of his family saying that he was exhibiting things in some way or another. When Alan climbed from the bath, he wrapped his towel around his waist and walked over to the vanity. He used a hand to wipe away the condensation on the mirror and with the feelings welling up inside him, Alan simply snapped the moment he looked in the mirror. He looked at the fading bruises, his still swollen eye socket, swollen nose, and fat lip and felt boiling hot rage welling up inside. Soon he could hear echoes of the words Trevor used to say to him. 'You're worthless, you're good for nothing, you don't matter, you're only good for one thing.' As Alan heard the things Trevor used to say, he felt the burn of tears and then the rage returned tenfold. Raising his hands, Alan covered his face and doubled over as he felt hatred for himself, at Trevor and then came the tears. The waves of emotion started and with it came the sniffles which soon turned to sobs which then progressed to an angered scream. He had no recollection of putting his fist through the mirror to disguise the anger and self-hatred he felt at being so frozen with fear that he was unable to protect himself.

Jeff was in his office down the hall, his sons apart from Alan gone on a rescue when he heard a bellowing scream followed by the sound of shattering glass. Jeff stood and ran from the room and he hurried to the bathroom where he heard Alan sobbing. He wrenched open the door and immediately went to Alan who was knelt on the floor amidst the broken mirror and took to holding him as he sobbed. Alan grappled onto his father, needing a lifeline now more than ever. Jeff cradled his son, whispering in his ear that he was okay, he was safe, Trevor wouldn't find him there on the island. Alan's sobs only seemed to become harder, more intense and in a moment of clarity – Alan realized that this wasn't healthy.

"Oh god, dad…I can't do this. I-I can't. I can't." Alan's cries broke Jeff's heart. The father of five held his son, running his hands through Alan's wet hair and he kissed his son's head. He didn't know what he could suggest, but he worried he'd lost his son. "I-I need help."

Jeff helped to stand Alan up, uncaring that he was just in a towel and he led Alan out of the bathroom and into his office down the hall. Once he had Alan seated, he sank down next to him.

"How can I help you? Just tell me what I can do to make this better for you." Jeff pulled the afghan blanket from the back of the couch and he draped it over Alan's form as he went to the corner of his office where he kept a first aid kit stashed in the off chance he ever needed it. He returned to Alan's side and proceeded to put some disinfectant on a cotton ball while he tried to get Alan's injured hand treated. He looked at the deep, jagged cuts and other lacerations on Alan's hand, where some glass even cut between his fingers.

"I t-think I need to talk to s-someone." Alan croaked as he let his dad doctor up his hand. "I can't handle this on my own, I thought I could…but I can't. It's too much."

"Do you want me to have Virgil talk to you or Gordon? They saw the aftermath of your ordeal." Alan shook his head in the negative. His dad looked confused until Alan elaborated.

"I think I need professional help, someone who I can talk to that can help me. Nothing against you all though." Alan said before he paused, a couple more tears leaving trails down Alan's cheeks at his admission. "Please don't say I'm crazy."

"You're not crazy. I'd never say that, but I am proud of you. It takes a lot of strength to admit that you need help and the fact that you can recognize your need for help, it just proves how strong you are." Jeff said, soothingly. He applied the bandage and then pulled his son into his arms. Alan stayed rigid for several long moments before he sagged against his dad, glad for the support. "I'll call around to find you somebody that you can talk to, then we can begin trying to put this behind us."

So needless to say that Jeff had scheduled two appointments, one with their family dentist and another with a professional therapist that specialized in domestic abuse. Alan was already taking a brave step by seeking help and Jeff wasn't about to allow Alan to back out on his appointments. Before they were to go, Jeff pulled Alan aside to find out for himself if Alan would be fine attending these appointments by himself or would he prefer Jeff be present. Alan insisted that he'd be fine but he appreciated his father's efforts. Jeff still took it upon himself to personally take Alan to his appointments, but he waited in the waiting room until Alan was done with both meetings. When Alan exited the appointment with the domestic abuse counselor, the woman smiled at Alan telling him she'd see him for their next appointment a week from that day. Jeff could tell that Alan had had a very emotional appointment. His eyes were a little puffy and Jeff watched Alan stuff a couple balled up tissue in his jeans pocket. Alan remained quiet as he and his father drove down the road. His mouth hurt from his dentist appointment. He had to have a lot of work done and his gums were sore. He was also feeling numb emotionally.

His appointment with the therapist had been eye opening to say the least. The therapist Evelyn Hoover had listened to Alan talk about how things had been great with his roommate until it wasn't. She asked him how he felt after the first attack and Alan remembered the shock he'd felt initially. It made Alan think back to the night it occurred.

Alan exited the bathroom, freshly showered after his race he'd participated in. He was almost giddy with excitement. It was one of his first big qualifying races and he'd advanced to the next round. He couldn't wait to call his family and tell them. Stopping by the kitchen, Alan stepped in and opened the refrigerator door, crouching down to grab a bottle of water from within and when he stood up he heard the keys in the lock at the front door.

It didn't occur to him at the time that it took a lot longer for the door to unlock than normal and Alan greeted his roommate with a smile. He hadn't realized that Trevor was beyond intoxicated, he'd never really showed any outward appearance of being drunk in the past. Raising his hand to give Trevor a high five, he was taken off guard when Trevor stumbled forward, raising a fist, and punching Alan across his jaw. It knocked Alan off balance, causing him to fall back, hitting the wall on the way down and he was stunned as it took him several seconds to figure out what had just happened.

He raised a hand and felt his throbbing cheek and he opened his mouth to work his jaw before he sent a venomous glare towards Trevor.

"What the hell is your problem? Fuck! The fucking hurt!" Alan yelled and he watched as Trevor wavered where he stood before he acted like he was coming at Alan and the younger threw his arms up to defend himself in the event of another attack.

"It's your fault that I lost, this was supposed to be MY win, MY time to shine and YOU ruined it! You selfish bastard!" Trevor yelled before he stood over Alan and punched the boy on the floor. Alan began to cower, trying to cover his head from further assault. He was in a predicament where he couldn't defend himself. Trevor stood above him and was raining down blows one after another.

When the assault finally came to an end, Trevor had stumbled into his room down the hall and left Alan where he was curled up on the floor. The youngest Tracy eventually uncurled from his protective ball and he was in an unbelievable amount of pain. It hurt to breath, hurt to move and just in general his whole body felt like one big headache. Alan crawled to his bedroom, slow and quiet until he'd made it to his pitiful excuse for a bed. It was a mattress on the floor, the frame Alan bought for himself, Trevor took and when Alan tried to say something Trevor told him to quit being selfish. Had Alan realized it then that Trevor was going to make waves, Alan might have recognized that Trevor was an unfit roommate, and he could have saved himself the pain.

Another occasion that Trevor had raised his hand to Alan had been after Alan's 21st birthday. Trevor had insisted on going to the bar, hoping to get a little action and Alan hadn't been too keen to go. He and Octavia had just begun dating and Alan felt like he was cheating by using his charm to attract girls for Trevor. Trevor had punched Alan once in the back of the head and to avoid further torment, Alan finally agreed to go. But not long after getting to one of the many dives, Alan had been working an angle to try to get a girl to go for Trevor and she wasn't interested in him. When Trevor started trying to woo her, she told him off and started showing Alan attention that he hadn't an interest in gaining. Alan told her he had a girlfriend and she accepted it and left. Trevor was blitzed, having started drinking before they got to the bar and having a few more while he waited for Alan to try and snag him a girl to warm his bed.

When Alan finally got a girl to look at Trevor, he stood up and told Trevor he was going back to their apartment. Trevor got mad because the girl bowed out of going to the apartment with two guys living there and he stalked after Alan who was walking to the bus stop. Without warning he'd gotten a shove from behind and Alan stumbled to the ground. He got a couple kicks to the back and fists to his face and then the attack was over. Almost as quick as it started. Alan dragged himself home having missed his bus and when he walked in, he could hear heavy grunting beyond Trevor's bedroom door, the headboard knocking against the wall and the obviously fake cries of pleasure from the girl Trevor had charmed. Alan went into his room and softly closed the door, grabbing his music player and plugging in his headphones. He'd rolled his eyes as he got his music started but was unfortunate enough to hear Trevor as he came to a finish. This was why he'd begun listening to music to go to sleep, he didn't like listening to his roommate in the throes of pleasure with a one-night stand. He'd been raised to respect the women in his life and even though they were dating, Alan wasn't able to bring himself to pressure Octavia for a few minutes of fun under the sheets. He was content to let things be and he knew when the time was right they'd be together.

By the time Alan had finished recounting everything to the therapist, he was unable to control the anger and tears over his situation. Dr. Hoover encouraged him to let it out, let the tears come to the surface. Use language and get mad. Alan had done exactly that and surprisingly after the first session, Alan already felt lighter.

After the appointment with Dr. Hoover, Alan left with his father and they drove across town to get to Tracy Enterprises, the initial plan was to spend the night as Alan had a follow-up dentist appointment the following morning to finish repairing his other teeth that had been damaged. When the father and son stopped to get dinner, Alan couldn't stop himself from looking around and over his shoulder every time he thought he heard Trevor's voice. Jeff couldn't help but to observe Alan and his skittish habits. Jeff walked over to Alan and gently put an arm around his shoulder and he felt Alan jump at the contact.

"Are you going to be okay? We can order in if that's better for you." Jeff whispered and he watched Alan duck his head in shame as his cheeks grew pink. His youngest son looked back up at his father, with the puppy dog pout before he shook his head stubbornly.

"No, I have to do this…I can't go through life looking over my shoulder, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Let's have dinner." Alan whispered back to his father. He tried not to let his dad see him looking around, worried that Trevor was going to show up at a moment's notice.

"Nobody will think any different of you if you can't. I won't think any differently of you. I'm proud of you. You've been so brave through this whole thing and it's okay to have a setback." Jeff continued at a whisper, so as not to embarrass his son. Alan ducked his head a little more if that was possible and Jeff took the lead, guiding Alan from the restaurant. He knew Alan had conceded and he wasn't going to force Alan to endure more. They sat in the car and Jeff called in the order, waiting for it to be delivered curbside. When they had their food, Jeff drove in the direction of the penthouse. They made it in a reasonable amount of time and both father and son boarded the elevator that took them to the top floor where they lived part time. They sat down to eat and Alan took a couple bite before he dropped his head into his hands.

Jeff detected a change in his son that he didn't know if he liked and he stood from his seat and went to crouch by Alan's side. Alan stayed where he sat, visibly shaking and Jeff hesitated in touching Alan. But he managed to coax Alan to turn towards him. Alan turned, and he allowed Jeff to embrace him as his lay his head on his father's shoulders. Jeff kissed the top of Alan's head and held his son. He felt bad about assuming Alan had been making the abuse up and he had a lot of making up to do. He intended to be Alan's support as long as he'd let him.

XXXXX

A phone ringing drew the attention of a young man who was under the hood of a vehicle. The young man looked across the room, wishing he wasn't alone right now. He didn't want to answer the phone with his hands covered in grease. When the phone continued ringing, the young man started grumbling as he grabbed a rag and began wiping his hands.

"Damn telemarketers not catching the drift."

Grabbing the phone roughly, a dull beep answered the ringing phone.

"What do you want?" Taking a deep breath he pulled the phone away from his ear before he put the phone back to his ear. "Trevor, where you been?"

If anyone had been in the room at the time of the phone call they'd have seen the young man's shoulders slump. Giving a shake of his head, the young man paced around the mechanic shop.

"I don't know man…I mean you know you have a temper. I know the kid and he's a good kid. He'd have no reason to lie. No…no, I'm not saying that. Dude, would you just calm the hell down? This is what I'm talking about." The young man argued. After a moment of silence he spoke again. "Alright…but it's gonna take me a couple weeks to get the money gathered. Do you think you can last a little while?"

The young man went silent presumably as he got reamed out from the other caller.

"Dude, I don't have a pocketbook big enough like our little prodigy. You forget I come from a meager upbringing. I can't possibly get the money together at the snap of a finger. You're going to have to have a little patience with me, okay?"