A/N: Happy Anniversary to this fic (on Dec 31)! Happy Holidays and Happy New Year!
Thanks very much for reading/reviewing/subscribing/favouriting.
Hopefully 2013 will produce more chapters and inspiration for this fic, certainly more than 2012 had (probably not 2011's record of 19 chapters though)

Flashback order: 14, 2, 9, 13, 17, 3, 15, 11, 8, 7, 6, 5, 12, 4, 10, 16.

Disclaimer: Bleach belongs to Kubo Tite.

Chapter 24: Grasp

The apple was crisp, sweet; the juices bursting with flavour as it filled her mouth. The crunch of the fruit as she chewed added to the joy that filled her as she ate. Bite after bite made Orihime feel as though her mind was filled with all the truths the world could hold, all the knowledge, all the joy, and all the beauty, and she felt as though she couldn't get enough—that one apple simply wasn't enough. If she couldn't have another one, she wanted to savour, to save what was left for a later time.

There was only a quarter of the red apple left by the time she stopped, and only then did she notice the rapt spectators surrounding her. Crimson coloured her cheeks as the thought came that she might have seemed like such a glutton in devouring nearly a whole apple in what seemed like mere seconds. Rukia stood beside her, uncustomarily gnawing at her lower lip, while in front of her both Senna and Neliel watched curiously.

"How do you feel?" asked the Goddess of Snow. "Are you alright?"

Still chewing, Orihime could only give her a nod in reply.

Rukia sent the Goddess of Autumn a venomous look. Noticing this, Senna simply sent her a sweet smile.

"It's not poisoned, see?" she said mockingly.

Rukia curled her hands into fists. "It might take its effect later."

Swallowing finally, Orihime placed a hand on Rukia's arm as an attempt to comfort her and to stay her from lunging at the other goddess. "It's very good," commented the auburn-haired to the giver of the fruit.

Turning to the bride of her former lover, Senna inquired, "And what is that apple to you?"

Orihime tilted her head to the side, puzzled. "Pardon?"

"Is it of joy?" elaborated Neliel, excited, almost bouncing on her feet, seeing that the situation seemed to be under control. "Mine always tastes of joy. It's a very good feeling."

Orihime nodded, thinking. "It is of joy, but more of truth. It tasted like what the colour blue would taste like..." Realizing what she said, she sank back. "I-if it had a taste."

The Goddess of Time clasped her hands together. "Blue! Oh I wish I'd gotten that red one instead. The golden apples taste like purple."

Even Rukia couldn't help laughing at that, though the worry hadn't dissipated from her eyes.

"Will you not finish the apple now?" asked Senna, and for a brief moment, Orihime thought she detected a hint of malice and impatience on the goddess's face. But perhaps it was merely a trick of the reflection of the bright sunlight on water.

The auburn-haired clasped the fruit as though cradling something precious. "It's so delicious that I want to savour it and taste it again later. W-will that be alright?"

"Oh." Taken back, a part of Senna was pleased at this unexpected reaction. But she pressed on nevertheless. "Are you sure you will not be swayed from this decision?"

There was something in the Autumn Goddess's voice that raised an alarm in her head, and Orihime realized with a sense of familiarity that it was the same kind of compulsion that used to overtake her whenever Rukia or Rangiku commanded her to do something. With a start, she came to the realization that this was perhaps one of the last residual pieces of her humanity, being able to feel this and identify it for what it was. Now, being of equal status to the other gods, she had the free will to disobey that compulsion.

"Why are you so keen on getting her to finish it right now?" asked Rukia suspiciously. "You did put something in it, didn't you?"

"Rukia!" exclaimed Neliel, her lips pursed in disappointment.

Senna laughed, waving her hand in the air. "Ah, don't mind me. It's just, as the one who'd given that gift, of course it stands to reason that I would like to see it enjoyed so thoroughly, is it not? Ah, well, it is enough to see that you managed to eat most of it and are planning to continue it later. I have trust in your word, bride of Death, and I'm very glad you found satisfaction in my gift. And you don't need to worry: even half-eaten, that fruit will keep its freshness and will not brown as the day passes." Turning to the Goddess of Snow, she held out a green apple. "I don't suppose you'd care for one?"

"Do you even need to ask?" countered Rukia coldly.

Senna only chuckled, returning the fruit to her basket. "Suit yourself."

Neliel released a deep exhale. "Well, now that the pleasantries are done, shall we catch up with each other, Senna?"

"If it pleases you. I'm sure there's a particular god you would like to speak to me about."

At this, the green-haired woman blushed, and with a smile and a nod to Orihime and Rukia, the Goddess of Time led her guest to the port-side chairs, both settling themselves down and chattering away.

Deflated, Rukia flopped heavily back down on her seat.

Worriedly, the auburn-haired touched her arm. "Are you alright?"

"I should ask you that."

Orihime looked at what remained of the apple in her hands. "I'm really okay, Rukia. Thank you, though, for being so caring." She squeezed the Snow Goddess's arm gently when she made to retort, stopping the dark-haired woman as she explained herself. "I know—I know that my life drastically changed because of her...But I know that she was only one of the causes, not the entirety of it. And I—what she said about new starts...that's what I've been trying to do. And I've resolved to let go of my worries, of things that bother me, and to work through my relationship with Ichigo. Because right now that's more important to me. And this apple—she said it is a symbol of that new start. For all of us. As I've put my trust in my new family and my new friends, I am also putting my trust in her good intentions."

Rubbing her face with her hands, Rukia released an exasperated exhale, not able to voice out her own thoughts on the matter. A shadowy figure suddenly took hold of Orihime's shoulders, startling them both.

"Ah, madam!" exclaimed Urahara. "Will you be so kind as to oblige me?"

"Don't sneak up on her like that!" admonished the Snow Goddess.

"Eh?" Orihime turned her head. "What is it?"

Kisuke held out a hand, indicating for her to precede him, and after giving a small nod to Rukia, she followed his direction.

The God of Knowledge and Invention leaned conspiratorially close to her ear, covering his mouth with his fan as they walked. "I hope you don't mind, but I've taken it upon myself to educate you in the ways of godhood."

"Eh? Oh, that's very nice of you—"

"I only endeavour to aim to help out the Death God and his family in any way I can."

"Thank you very much but—"

"And here we are!"

The god had led her to where the husband of the Snow Goddess sat, who was quietly polishing a sword in a corner. The redhead raised his head when they drew near, eyebrows raised in question.

"Renji will be your teacher."

"What?"

"Eh?"

"Brilliant, isn't it?"

"What's going on?"

"But I thought you were—"

"Oh please, please. I am flattered you thought so highly of me, but in this instance, Renji here is the better educator. After all, he is also a newly-made god, and therefore can tell you things I would have no knowledge of." Grinning widely, the tow-headed god snapped his fan closed. "Well, then, I'll leave you two to it."

Setting down the weapon, Renji watched the god walk away. "What's going on?" he repeated his earlier question.

"Um, he said he'll teach me about godhood, but he just said now that you'll be doing it."

"What the hell?"

"I'm sorry."

"No," he waved. "Don't apologize. That guy, seriously." Sighing, he indicated the seat next to him, scratching his forehead as he thought.

Lowering herself, she looked at him expectantly, hands nearly squeezing the apple she still held.

"Teach you about godhood..." he began. "To tell you the truth, I'm not really sure how to go about this, where to start or anything."

"I'm not sure, either."

After drumming his hands on his lap, he reached up to pinch the bridge of his nose. "Well, um, is there anything in particular you'd like to know, or you're worried about?"

Orihime's brows furrowed as she thought and said the first thing that popped into her head. "Um, what kind of power do you have?"

"Me?" Surprised, Renji merely shrugged. "Just the usual, nothing special, really."

"You mean you can also change broken things back to the way they were like they've never been broken at all?"

He frowned, his narrowed eyes narrowing further. "...No, nothing like that. I can flash-step."

"Flash-step?"

"Yeah. You know, being able to travel a great distance with just one step, or even to just quickly move from one side of the room to another in a single bound. All gods can do it."

"Oh." She bit her lip, picturing in her mind where she could have seen that, and concluded that she had witnessed Ichigo do it at least once or twice. "I don't think I can do that."

"Huh. Well." He coughed, looking up at the sky as he thought about something to say. "Maybe not now, but someday you'll be able to."

Her eyes brightened as she voiced out her realization. "Perhaps it's because I haven't tried it yet?"

"That could be."

"I mean, the other times, the power...um, things just happened without me meaning them to."

His tattooed eyebrows rose, and he couldn't help feeling at a loss and simply settled for a nod in response. He remembered the incident on the day before yesterday, of her spiritual pressure seeming to have disappeared, where everyone was unable to sense her, a cause drastic enough for the Death God to threaten to kill a Scribe in front of the other gods in his father's hall, no less.

And then he recalled how it had been like for him when he first became a god, after getting over being sick from the concoction that changed him that had been made by Urahara. "Sometimes, that's how they start out," he offered. "Sometimes you think, 'if only I can do this,' and then poof, it happens. You have to learn what it is first, though, before you can control it. You need to understand its nature, it essence, and using the power over and over helps you in reaching this understanding. Really, it's just like any skill that, if you do it enough times, you can master."

"I guess this means I need to remember how it felt. The power I mean."

"Yeah. Or even how you were feeling just before it happened."

Pursing her lips, Orihime thought back to the evening in the library. There was a lot of fear, resignation, and even resistance to that resignation. She wanted to be protected. She wanted to keep at bay the one that was causing her to fear. And then she'd felt a warm, golden glow come from within herself, and it felt as though it was a shield.

And yesterday, when she was at the Karakura cemetery witnessing the destruction of the headstones...something had come from inside her, another warm, golden glow that had fixed everything that had been shattered. The only thing she could remember that could tie these two events together would be her feeling of desperation. But surely, in order for her to access those powers, there had to be some other way? She couldn't just wait for another moment when all she was left with was urgent despair, could she?

The silence continued, not quite uncomfortable, and in an effort to learn more about godhood, she asked, "Are you a god of anything?"

Renji shook his head. "No. I haven't picked anything yet."

Interest piqued, she tilted her head to side as she questioned, "You get to choose on what to be a god of? I don't understand."

"Well...how should I put this?" The redhead rubbed his chin as he thought. "Gods who are born as gods, their powers are already predetermined. Sometimes, if they feel like they could take on another duty, they choose to oversee two or more things. Like Rukia and Ichigo, for example. Rukia is originally only the Goddess of Snow. But since she's really good at drawing, she decided to also be the Goddess of the Arts. With Ichigo, he was born with the power of the Death God, although it didn't manifest until after his sisters were born. He became the God of the Moon later, when he first took his heart out and placed it in the sky. Really, as long as nobody else presides over something, then it's okay for them to pick another."

"I see. So, are you going to become the God of Flash-steps?"

A rueful grin stretched the corner of his lip. "No. That title is informally held by Yoruichi, I believe."

"Oh."

"With us, we're only gods who became gods through association. Marrying a god entitles us to godhood, but we're not required to be gods of anything. The power or powers we get doesn't really have anything relatable to preside over. It's random, really. Maybe the god who made the potion added something to it that gave us what ever kind of power we ended up receiving. Maybe we already have something in ourselves, in our bodies or hearts or minds, that the potion merely enhanced. I can't really say much about this as I don't have much knowledge in how a god is created.

"In any case, what this boils down to for us is choice. Since we're not born with powers, only granted them, we can choose to be a god of something. For example, I can choose to become the God of Baboons and Snakes just because I happen to like those animals, but I don't have to be. I'm certainly not required to be just because I happen to favour them. And they don't really need gods anyway, so me presiding over them wouldn't really be much work.

"With your powers, the more you learn about it, the more you can decide for yourself how useful it can or can't be. It's really up to you. From what you've said about fixing things that had been broken, maybe you can be that kind of goddess, if you want."

Orihime's mind churned as she struggled with the information she had just been given, but couldn't help smiling as she remarked, "Hmm, being called the 'Goddess of Fixing Broken Things' doesn't quite have the ring to it, don't you think?"

He threw back his head and laughed. "Well, I'm sure it can be shortened to something much more elegant."

Ducking her head, she gave the redhead a warm, grateful smile. "Thank you, Renji, for your help."

Embarrassed, Renji scratched the back of his head as he tried to keep his blushing to a minimum. "I wasn't really much of a help."

"No, I really appreciate you taking the time to talk to me about this, even though you've been made to by the God of Knowledge and Invention."

"No, it's alright. I guess, being in the same situation as you, I really am the one qualified to talk to about this. So, um, I appreciate your thanks, even though I feel like I didn't really help much."

A silence enveloped them for a space of a few seconds that was broken by a loud grumble that issued from her stomach. Embarrassed, she rubbed her belly, peeking at him from under her bangs. "Sorry."

He just sent her an answering grin. "It happens. Don't worry about it. Besides, you're eating for two now."

A small smile stretched her lips. "Yes."

He tapped his knee as he shook his head. "I gotta say, though, that facing all those years in that condition...man, I can't even really imagine that, even though I've lived for a really long time."

Orihime let out a chuckle, then frowned. "I'm sorry...you said 'years.' What do you mean?"

"Hmm? Oh. The pregnancy."

She couldn't help giggling and shaking her head. "I think you mean 'months.'"

Biting his lip, Renji scratched his temple. "Well...I suppose, since a year does consist of months. But it's easier to say 'one-hundred years' than saying 'one-thousand-two-hundred months.'"

Orihime's smile froze, and she could swear she felt her heart cease its beating inside her chest just now. She was so still, the only thing that moved were her eyelids as she blinked in disbelief. "Eh?"

Noticing her present state of frozenness, Renji couldn't help but gulp loudly, feeling as though he was suddenly treading on dangerous ground as he elaborated, "I don't suppose anybody told you that a goddess's pregnancy lasts for a century...?"

Feeling as though the breath had been knocked out of her, her jaw fell slack as her mind tried to wrap itself around this new piece of information. "I...I think I need to sit down." She frowned, through her numbness starting to notice her suddenly trembling legs. "I'm already sitting, aren't I?"

The redhead could only nod out of nervousness.

"Oh." Hysterical laughter began to bubble out of her even as tears sprang in her eyes. "Shouldn't it just be nine months?"

For lack of anything else to do in this kind of situation, Renji reached over and awkwardly patted her shoulder. "A-a g-god's body is d-different than a human's," he stammered.

"But it's so long."

"Er...um...yeah..."

"Why?"

"...I d-don't really know. I'm not really the person with that kind of knowledge."

"And everybody knows that it's that long."

He had to swallow the huge lump in his throat before he could respond. "Everybody who's a god."

Her lips trembled as she imparted, "I've only lived for eighteen years, and now I'm going to be pregnant for a hundred."

"...er...I-I'm sorry about that...?"

"I'll be pregnant for a longer time than I've lived."

"...um..."

"That's...twisted, isn't it?"

"I-I guess."

"It doesn't even make sense."

"I-I suppose n-not."

She burst into tears.

Renji jumped out of his seat and reached out but stopped himself from taking hold of her shoulders out of fear and anxiety. "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to! I swear!" He looked around, growing frantic at the sudden situation he found himself in where minutes before everything had been calm and friendly. For lack of anything else, he yelped, "Help! Help!"

In a flash, the two were immediately surrounded by the other passengers of the boat.

"What's going on?"

"Renji, what have you done?"

"It wasn't me, really!"

"Oh, my dear. Here, cry into my bosom."

"Tsk-tsk. She should cry in my manly chest instead."

"Why is she crying?"

"Is something the matter?"

"Renji!"

"I didn't do anything, I swear!"

APPENDIX

Rukia - Goddess of Snow and the Arts
Senna - Goddess of Autumn
Neliel - Goddess of Time, Messenger of the Sun God
Spirit King - God of the Sun, Ruler of All Gods and the Natural Order of the World
Urahara - God of Knowledge and Invention
Renji - formerly a Scribe (servant to the gods), now a god by association for marrying a goddess
Yoruichi - Goddess of Cats (and Flash-Steps)
Orihime - formerly a human, now a goddess by association for marrying a god; possibly the newly-made Goddess of Fixing Broken Things (?) (just kidding ;P )

Thanks for reading :)
Dec/2012