The colours of the seasons are forever changing. The nights sky is at the darkest it's ever been and the moon shines the brightest it's ever been. The star's are but a mere reflection and half as bright. A sad song play's softly in the background. The song is From now on, the group is Shinee. As the song begins English subtitles appear across the screen though the figures that stare out the window and who's dark Shadows rest one the wall barely notices this. Knowing the song by heart as they do. Each figure silently sings the appropriate part, letting the song fill the rest, an though it seems an age it is but a mere few minutes as the song ends an fades into silence before a different melody takes its place.
Start...
Taemin...
If I hadn't met you yet, what would I have been doing now. Not even knowing the meaning of love, where would I have strayed.
Jonghyun...
No words to describe my surging emotions, but you, we understand each other. Always have always will.
End of the song
Minho.. I offer you all my love.
Jonghyun...
And endless gratitude. I'll be with you forever.
One remains staring out of the window at the silver moon while the rest huddle close together. Though none mentioned it each knew how long it had been since that song had been sung. Until now it had never been sung even in silence or heard since that day until that moment, and old memories begun to flow freely as did tears. All the songs that had been written by their late brother and best friend had been stored away for safe keeping. Never seeing the light of day or sung again because of the painful memories the songs invoked and the loss that they were reminded of time and again whenever they heard their songs played and Jonghyuns voice was heard. But all that was about to change. Only happy memories came to mind and though there was sad emotions and wishful longing their grief had long since passed and been forgotten though not their lost member his memories were always there at the back of their minds never forgotten. Key who had been the only one still remaining at the window turned from the moons gaze to the rest of his hyungs and spoke.
'It's time don't you think that we bring out those songs instead of keeping them safe and secure. We should be honoring his memory more and more with each passing day that we grow older and not hide them as we have been. Hyung Jonghyun would not want us to, he would want us to live our lives each day to the fullest and to remember him not for what he did but for what he gave us and the rest of the world.'
He moved from the window and settled on the empty seat next to the rest of them. Each of them huddled against each other. Onew picking up the remote turned off the noise in the background and taking a deep breath he let it out and said.
'Yes it's time to take those songs out and sing them, sing our hearts out for ourselve's for shawols and most of all for our hyung. We shouldn't have stopped singing them we should have sang or listened to them whenever we needed to.'
He looked at each of them in turn.
'We all made a song for him and we gave them to our shineeworld when we should have also included ourselves in that.'
Onew walked out of the room and into the recording room and hunted through the filing drawers for all the music that their hyung had written over the yearsthey'd been together since their debut right up until the time he left them behind, not just on paper but the audio files as well and set them up on the computer in alphabetical order and hit the play. Because he had left the door open the sound of the music begun to fill the space and the rest of the members walked into the recording room and found a seat and just sat there listening and singing along the tears falling freely down their faces to the melodic sound of jonghyuns exceptional voice.
''What would we have been hyungs if we had not become Shinee and met one another? I've often wondered what we'd all have been doing. Would we still have met each other, and would our hyung still be here with us? I think so but in what capacity that would have been is the question I sometimes wonder at the oddest of moments.'
Taemin said softly 3 heads turned his way and looked at him thoughtfully. None of them had wondered this as their baby makanae had. each glanced at one another before returning their gaze back to their youngest. The music played softly in the background going from one track to another but the members had forgotten as they pondered Taemins question seriously. No one responded at first as they were still thinking through Taemin's question. Eventually it was Onew who answered first.
'I think we would all have come to meet one another even had we not become trainees and debuted as we did. There is not one of us that does not have some aspect that doesn't involve the music industry in some way wether it is songwriting dancing fashion ect.' He nodded his head thoughtfully. 'Yes I think we would not only have met but would also have become the best of friend's and brothers all the same.'
Onew smiled though there was a touch of sadness to it as he brushed his hand across Taemin's head as he wondered just how long their youngest had been thinking of this. Both the other member's also nodded their heads in agreement that they would have still come together in some way.
'But in what capacity hyung. I think that is what I am most curious about especially for hyung Jonghyun. And would he had overcome his illness or would we have still lost him as we did.'
Taemin replied as he out his head into his hands to wipe away the tears that flowed down his face. Key moved and settled next to him hugging him since he was motherly to most of them in some way whenever it was needed. Onew had also moved closer to him on his other side and minho had moved his seat closer in front of him so that he too was as close as he could be.
'We're here for you Taem, your hyungs will always be here whenever you need us to be. You were closest to hyung Jonghyun, after all he was your number one fan.'
minho said taking taemins hands in his trying to make their youngest smile.
'we all know hyung would shout at us for being this way except you you always got away with anything with him. anything you wanted you always got it he was able to give it to you,'
minho said which made taemin smile though it was a sad one.
'yes he did, I miss him.' 'we all do taem i often wonder why i was the last one he came to visit before that day. I don't know the answer none of us do or ever will that's why it hit all of us so hard.' key replied softly.
'You would have been as you are now taemin a dancer or perhaps a choreographer in the muisic world. I also think you would have still had a singing career. Somehow the life we have is one suited to you. Like hyung you shine brightly in this world.'
Onew said to him nodding.
'Yes definately you would still have the career you have now, as for the rest of us. I think at least for me that perhaps I would have been more of a vocal coach rather than a singer or dancer someone that helps to teach trainees to sing or maybe I would have been in the business world.' he sighed thinking about it as his brothers listed and looked at one another in surprise. 'i majored in music long before computers so I think i would have been more on the vocal coaching side.'
Onew went quiet and when he took the time to look at them he saw their surprised expressions.
'What?'
he asked looking uncomfortable.
'We're just surprised.'
minho replied sitting back in his chair staring.
'what about hyung what would he have done?'
taemin asked.
'teaching'
key said and all heads looked his way.
'What? hyung once told me he always wanted to be a teacher or radio host which is what he did. He liked to listen and offer his honest opinion on things. but he was also a writer so i think he would still have written his songs just not the way he did for us all.'
key sighed.
'we all know hyung didn't like being out when he wasn't recording in the studio or on stage. he always stayed in. Wether his life would have been better and not the way we all know it was we'll never know.'
key said as he then went on to say that what he would have done.
'Me well since i am good when it comes to design or fashion i think that that is what i would have been doing that wether it was on tv or were behind the scenes for different musicians. I don't know but i don't think that i woud have been involved with the music world if our lives had been different than they are now. also i don't know if you all would have met me either, i like to think we would have still met somehow though.'
after he finished speaking everyone looked at minho and wondered what he would have been doing instead. minho shrugged his shoulders and shook his head.
'I wouldn't have been in the music scene or been a rapper. i wouldn' have even entertained the idea of going into the music business. i would have stuck to modeling and acting because i was good at it and since my father didn't want me to follow in his footsteps and go into sports even though i was really good at it i chose to go into modeling and acting instead. '
he replied as he really took the time to think about it. everyone sat in silence their own music playing in the background and the sound of jonghyuns soft voice echoed as his solo work played.
'I think that if we were meant to have a different life than the one we all came to have then we would have. but what if situations are things we should put aside for we will never know what our lives would have been or if we had or would have met each other. we should be more concerned with our lives as they really are.'
key replied as he reached out and halted the music.
'This moment right here right now is all that we have and all that matters. we have to savour and remember every thing we say and do from here on out for we never know when it will turn out to be the last. Hyung jonghyun would not want us to look to or for what if's he would tell us to live in the now and not worry over things that are gone or are yet to come. that we should live our lives every day as if it were our very last day here on earth.'
taemin, minho and onew looked up at key who was standing and pacing the room. this upset taemin.
'how can you say that!'
taemin stared crying again upset by his words.
'ya! key issi that was un called for.'
minho snapped at him in an angry tone. key came to a stop and turned and looked at him.
''It's the truth we are who we are there is no what if life for us this moment right here and now is! so unless we all quit this business and do something else.'
he snapped back. onew who had been silent till then and holding an upset taemin finally snapped and lost his temper and slamed his hand down on the table hard enough for them all to turn and stop.
'Enough. you! all are showing not only disrespect but dishonor to hyung jonghyun and his memory and all he stood for and i will not put up with that! not to mention you both upset taemin and me. Hyung is not here and you should damn well show the respect and honour to him he deserves when he's not here to defend himself. You two should be ashamed and apologize not only to me and taemin but to each other and most of all you should apologize to our hyung who we buried! he would be the one most hurt by all of this! Its a good job he's not here anymore to see how you two are behaving. but since he is not here i and taemin will speak for him. Get your act together and stop this now.'
onew returned to his seat and settled down with a crying taemin hugging him close and rubbing his back in comfort. key anad minho looked at one another in shame and then knelt beside taemin.
'Taem we're sorry, hyung onew ssi is right. we should have known better. and if hyung could hear us wherever he is then we are sorry to him too and we will try to be better hyungs to you and each other.'
minho said as he sat there beside their youngest.
'Ya! taem i agree so we hope you can forgive us for shameful behaviour and call us out on it whenever you think you should so that we do indeed do better. we love you and we love hyung though he's not here anymore and that will never change. we are and always will be a 5 piece group. shinee will always be five and will always be there for shineeworld as they have been there for us. we are and always will be family'
taemin raised his head and looked at them and though his cheeks were stained with tears he smile and nodded.
'Family that's the best thing ever, as long as we remember that and keep our hyung and our shineeworld in our hearts and minds. other things can be forgiven and forgotten.'
each member held each other close together for warmth and comfort and playing in the background once again was the song that brought them all to this moment. and the fading voice of their hyung jonghyun as the song came to an end.
Start...
Taemin...
If I hadn't met you yet, what would I have been doing now. Not even knowing the meaning of love, where would I have strayed.
Jonghyun...
No words to describe my surging emotions, but you, we understand each other. Always have always will.
End of the song
Minho.. I offer you all my love.
Jonghyun...
And endless gratitude. I'll be with you forever.