It's cool... Cool... I first read that review and laughed. Then I thought about it and realized there really wasn't one. Then I thought a little more and remembered this is a Diary after all and most diaries don't have plots. That's my story and I'm sticking to it...
Disclaimer: Nintendo owns King Koopa and all Darklandians...
Day 92-
After me and Loki bid "Good Day" to King Koopa, my blue shelled friend entered the brick combination opening the path so that we could pick up where we left off yesterday. The guards and servants continued staring in our direction but still didn't dare making a move.
'Thank you my king' I thought happy to have his protection even though he said I'd lose it out here.
It didn't take long for us to find the library and after seeing the enormity of it I couldn't help becoming awestruck. Yesterday Loki asked if King Koopa's private collection was as impressive as the castle's library. Well the official answer to that question is-No.
My king's library had around ten to twenty thousand books but the keep's selection had to be tens of millions. Books ran along shelves going wall to wall while the case stretched from floor to ceiling on every wall.
The glow from the volcano lit the entire room through a pair of skylights in the ceiling. I noticed that all the books had black leather style covers but were wordless. Even the spines lacked the identifiers necessary for the reader to recognize title and author. Chalk one up for King Koopa's library; at least there I know what I'm reading.
"Master Loki, how do you know what you're reading," I asked pulling and opening a book. 'Strange? Even the inside pages are text less' I thought flipping to multiple blank pages.
"Our king cataloged everything by subject watch," Loki answered as I replaced the book onto its shelf. My buddy led me to the center of the room. "Books on the various types of mushrooms, please."
Easily a hundred different books flew off the shelves and floated around his head. It was a really cool method but that's still too many options if you ask me.
"Can I try," I asked. "Books on Princess Toadstool, please," I said when Loki nodded. Nothing happened.
"I never seen it not respond," Loki scratched his head. "Try again."
"Books on Princess Peach." Nothing. "Books on King Koopa." Nothing. "Books on Super Mario? Yoshi? Dress socks?" Still nothing happened. I frowned turning to Loki, "I guess I broke it."
Loki laughed. "Books on Dress socks, please," he asked and a group of 50 books circled his head. "Weird. I never saw that happen before."
"Could it be because I'm a slave," I added my own laugh.
"No. I've seen slaves use it before," Loki rested his chin on his hand.
A goomba with white busy eyebrows, red spirally eyes and get this a monocle (How cool is that? It looked like a mad scientist) appeared from behind a pile of books. He was 4.5 feet tall; 3ft of which was just its head.
"It's because he's human," the goomba said annoyed.
I smiled. This was the first time I've ever got to talk to a goomba. I'm assuming it was an old timer because of the white hair and monocle. Ha, ha! A monocle! Why can't I get over that?
"Ah Professor Gazmo," Loki greeted the librarian. "This is the maggot."
The goomba sized me up. "Doesn't look like much."
'Ouch' I thought unable to suppress a laugh. "Nice to meet you professor."
"Don't talk to me, human," the professor ordered snidely.
'Double Ouch! They really don't like me' I thought turning to Loki. My friend seemed annoyed at the goomba's attitude.
"What do you mean because he's human," Loki said with a bit of a snarl. It went unnoticed by Gazmo.
"His majesty chose to keep this wealth of knowledge a secret from humans as a precaution," Gazmo informed. He continued seeing Loki's questioning look, "Considering the humans that have infiltrated the castle so far, I believe his majesty made the correct choice."
Loki didn't seem convinced. "The only humans ever to enter the castle were the Super Mario brothers," Loki countered.
"Exactly," Gazmo sighed rolling his crazy eyes. "The SUPER Mario brothers," he emphasized "super". It made sense.
Recalling what my king told me about Mario and that the plumber threw him around by the tail, humans sounded powerful enough in this world. I think my king made the right choice limiting their knowledge too. Although…
"But I'm not a human," I pointed to myself drawing both Loki's and Gazmo's attention. I smiled, "I'm a footstool."
Loki broke out in laughter but the professor's white bushy brows narrowed joining his already maddening eyes. Before Gazmo had a chance to chew me out, Loki's stomach growled and he shuffled me out of the library.
We wandered a little further in the castle before entering into the kitchen. Apparently, we made it just in time for the lunch rush as dozens of Koopa troopas ran around the room like chickens with their heads cut off.
I watched as one turtle prepared a pot of soup and another one broke leaves off a tree branch placing them into a bowl. I guess it was suppose to be a salad. Ah I was right as I saw them chop a beat the size of Jimmy's head and a red capped mushroom (I hope it wasn't Jimmy's head) adding both to the plant mix.
At another station, a Koopa troopa in a chef's hat and jacket used a butcher knife to trim a tray of meat. I guess it was Yoshi meat. As we approached his location, the turtle ran about ten feet from the counter.
Suddenly a blue stone surrounded by spikes fell from the sky making an "Oof" noise. When the rock ascended back into the ceiling, each piece of meat was flatter than a pancake. That must be how the chef makes the meat so tender. The turtle returned to his station and began prepping another tray.
Loki approached the other turtle reaching out to tap him on the shoulder. The chef turned startled swinging his knife. Moving faster than I ever seen him, Loki drew his bone sword from somewhere in his shell deflecting the butcher's blade into the air.
The whole kitchen staff froze and fell silent. Loki and the chef stared at one another almost as if waiting for the other to make a move. Eventually the stalemate ended with Loki and the cook breaking into beaming smiles followed by a bear hug.
"Loki, how you doing brother," the chef smiled pulling back.
"Good and you, Xander," Loki replied.
"What are you doing here," Xander asked.
Loki grabbed his belly when if growled again, "Lunch buddy."
"Why back in the kitchen instead of one of the dining rooms?"
Loki's attention shifted to me. I had remained stationary unsure of the reception I was going to receive from the knife wielding cook. "He wanted to meet you," Loki answered.
"This the punk that's got the castle all discombobulated," Xander asked pointing his knife toward me.
"Yep. This is King Koopa's footstool," Loki lowered to a harsh whisper giving me a half smile. "Although he likes to be called maggot or bug."
"Doesn't look like much," Xander's eyes surveyed me from top to bottom.
'Ouch' I thought. I guess my sneaky muscle regimen must be paying off. I mean it has to be if everyone's first impression of me is so low.
"Maggot, come over here and meet the chef," Loki commanded.
I approached the turtle and bowed. It was another motion done in the cartoons I watched. It's considered a sign of respect I think.
"Thank you for the meals, sir," I said staring at the floor. I noticed his shoes were black. I wonder if that meant his shell was black too. "They are the most delicious breakfasts, lunches, and dinners I've ever had."
I continued staring at the ground when the chef responded, "You ate the meals meant for King Koopa."
"Yes, sir, somehow my king finds the will to share his meals with me," I answered still bowing. "My favorite have been the Yoshi ribs. Thank you sir."
There was a pause. Could the chef not receive compliments either? I can't imagine that some one that makes food that good would not be thanked or told about it.
"Loki does this bug do this often?"
Loki laughed, "Yep, Xander. It's been nonstop since we bumped into each other."
"Listen maggot stand up straight. This is weird," the chef ordered. I complied. He went on rubbing his neck, "Listen if I had known King Koopa was sharing his food with you, I'd have spit in yours or something."
"Then I can't wait for lunch." I joked. "I bet it would just add another layer of flavor."
Loki joined in my laugh while Xander sort of looked off to the side. Preparing two dishes and a bowl of porridge, the chef turned to the rest of the kitchen. "I'm taking a half hour lunch."
Next thing I knew, the three of us had settled down at a small table in a tiny dining room. Xander set a plate in front of him and Loki before giving me the bowl. I never had porridge before so I'm not sure if it's supposed to be thick and lumpy. I took a spoonful and made a face.
"Ha… Pay back for all of those royal quality dinners you had," Xander smiled evilly. "Outside of the king's room, you'll get the same slop we give the other slaves."
"It's delicious," I said taking a second mouthful.
"Oh it is," Xander took the bowl and spit. Did you ever see a Koopa troopa spit? It's like he submerged the whole bowl into a pond. "Try it now."
Raising another spoonful to my mouth, Loki moved as quickly as he did defending himself in the kitchen. He knocked the spoon out of my hand.
"Don't eat that," he ordered then took my bowl and empty the contents into a trash can. Xander stared in silence when Loki slid his dish to me. "You can have mine."
"But Master Loki you wanted something to eat," I stared at the plate.
"It's alright. I've lost my appetite," Loki never broke eye contact from Xander.
"So it's true. You are a traitor," Xander said looking coldly at me. "Protecting a human. Despicable."
I divided the contents on the plate in half dumping what looked like half a steak and some vegetables (I don't really like vegetables either except for green beans. The others rank barely above fungi) into the bowl. I pushed the remaining plate of food to Loki.
"Just like during our travels Master Loki," I said. He nodded digging into his half.
"Loki, how can you protect a human," Xander watched as we ate. "Especially considering your family obligations. It's not safe. Aren't you worried about them?"
Family obligations? I wasn't going to ask him until later but given Xander's current attitude I may not have to ask at all.
"Not all humans are bad," Loki said. "This maggot is not Super Mario. He hasn't done anything to attack or provoke the Darklands. He willingly came here to meet the king and he saved my life.
"I promised my king that I would protect him and show him around the castle," Loki stared at Xander. "Sheila understands and supports my decision."
So Loki's wife's name is Sheila. Oh man, I wanted to ask him questions but held my tongue. I didn't want to force Loki into a position that would undermine his authority.
"What I don't understand," Loki stated annoyed. "This human has already won over King Koopa and earn his majesty's respect. I don't understand why the rest of the Darklands has not accepted him yet."
"He's human. Have you forgotten that humans kill Darklandians every day," Xander yelled.
"TOM IS NOT SUPER MARIO," Loki growled seething.
With that outburst, Xander fell silent. His cold stare relaxed into the warm accepting one shared between him and Loki before lunch. A smirk creased Xander's face.
"Alright brother calm down. You're right. This maggot is not Super Mario," the chef looked at me. He made a face, "Tom yuck."
I broke into laughter after just taking a bite of steak. Xander's well placed quip sent a piece up and out my nose. Both Xander and Loki entered their own fits of laughter erasing all the tension in the room.
We finished our meals in peace and quiet. Before returning to the tour, Loki made Xander promise to never spit in my food again. The chef agreed making eye contact with me guaranteeing it.
"Thank you Master Loki," I said after exiting a room considered a pool with water temperatures at 324 degrees. Safe to say, I won't be using the pool.
"What for Tom," Loki questioned opening a new secret passage.
"Protecting me," I answered. "I'm sure it's hard to stand up to your brother like that."
"Xander isn't my brother," Loki responded then elaborated. "We call each other that because we were in the same training class. We helped each other survive our first couple years serving in King Koopa's army."
Another reason I want to find Morton. If for no other reason than to make another real friend, I recalled Loki's quick reflexes. "Even so that was amazing how you blocked that knife and knocked my spoon from my hand," I moved my hands trying to mimic his motions. "So fast. Hey Loki could you show me how to be fast."
"I don't know what I can teach you," Loki laughed. "As I recall you're already fast with your hands."
We emerged from the passage back inside my king's hallway. Loki unlocked the door but didn't try to enter this time. I was about to enter when I paused.
"Loki what family obligations are you putting at risk to help me," I asked misty eyed.
"Oh I guess the king didn't tell you," Loki replied. "My wife Sheila hatched three kids. Two boys and a girl.
"They're the reason it took so long for your request to go through," Loki scratched his chin. I was speechless. "King Koopa asked me but the eggs hadn't hatched yet. I asked for the king if you could wait until they did. He agreed."
"Congratulations, Loki," I hugged him lifting the reptile off the floor. Setting my friend down, I asked the all important question, "What are their names?"
Loki held up a finger. While wagging it, he winked, "Now now, that's a secret until King Koopa lets you go and see them."
"That's mean," I frowned watching Loki smile evilly. "Oh shouldn't you get going and help your wife?"
"It's okay. Sheila's stronger than me and she has that little Shy Guy there to help her," he answered.
"Really Simon's your slave," I asked. "Do you know what happened to Ed and Bain?"
Loki placed his hand to his chin. "King Koopa assigned both the horse and wolf to Kol's Ground Pound Squad. Last I heard Kol's very proud of their performance.
"The two joined his ranks and almost instantly became devoted soldiers. I think both of them even protected Kol during a mission in the jungle," Loki answered before finishing with, "Since Simon was weaker, he was assigned to my house. Though he's more my friend than a slave and I think he knows it."
"I'm happy they're getting along with everyone," I replied. "Have a great night, Loki. I'll see you tomorrow."
"Definitely, good night Tom," Loki walked away as I entered my king's chamber.