Hi! See? I promise it wouldn't take so long this time!
I wanna thank ThecDKnight for recommending me this song! I think it fits the chapter beautifuly to Elizabeth and Edward's relationship!
Now, about last chapter...
Thank you soo much for the people who reviewed and still have faith in me! I was so sad some people bailed the story thinking the worst SMH... anyway, thank you again for your amazing reviews, and I promise... the angst is over, and now the drama begins! Be patient! I don't want to say anymore since I don't want to spoil it for you! Just remember, this story takes place some time during New Moon, I hope all of you are catching the similarities!
Special thanks to Lisopera for prereading and Cattinson for her awesome betta skills!
SM owns everything!
Chapter 14: Run
"Run" – Snow Paltrow
I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done
And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you, dear
1 year later…
"Daddy!" Lizzie jumps onto my back giggling, the sound makes me smile in return. "Did I scare you?"
I laugh.
"Of course, I didn't hear you coming!" I lie.
"SEE?!" She turns back to Seth with a playful glare "I told you I'd get him this time!"
Seth just rolls his eyes at her, seeing through my lie but doesn't say anything, not wanting to spoil her fun like me.
"Yes, you are getting better at hunting." Seth compliments her "But there are a few things you could still work on."
With that, Lizzie releases me and goes back to Seth as she listens intently to his instructions. They've been like this since yesterday when Lizzie said she wanted to learn to hunt like me. I wasn't too comfortable with it since she isn't as strong as a vampire and I didn't mind getting her food for her but she argued that she had speed to her advantage. In the end, she is as stubborn as her mother and as I can't deny her anything she asks for either, I asked Seth to teach her a few tricks instead of me. I didn't feel comfortable teaching her these things, I didn't like seeing her as a prey and pouncing on her to show her the gist of it, that's why I asked Seth to do it.
With a sigh, I return to my journal.
It's been a little more than a year since… since we left Alberta, and during all this time I have shown Lizzie the world.
She has grown so much Angel, you should see her. I wish you were here so you could see how beautiful she is, as beautiful as you.
With another sigh I close my journal in my lap and look up at the sky.
I miss you.
I love you, more than yesterday.
We just got back from Australia about two weeks ago, and now we're are back on Isle Esme, we thought we could end our vacation where we started it. Things are better now, kind of. So I thought it was time to go back, although I haven't called Alice or Esme since I could still change my mind. I bet Alice is going crazy.
There are more good days than bad days now, -for both of us- but those bad days still show up once in a while. I think Lizzie is handling it way better than me, she has tried to put up a brave face but I still see her sadness whenever she sees or does something it reminds her of her of you.
I close my eyes and remember the time she spent two days crying when we first got to Isle Esme, feeling bad for being in such a beautiful place without her mother. Seth and I tried to comfort her as best as we could, explaining to her that Bella would have wanted her to enjoy her life. I know I was being an hypocrite since I too hated myself for continuing with life without her, but I reasoned that no matter how wrong it was for me to do it, I had to for our daughter. The only way Lizzie would smile or try to do something she would like was if I did it too.
So I put on my mask, swallowed my pain and came out of my own shell. Even if I would never move on, or I'll never forget her or forgive myself, I had to continue with life without her, for our daughter. As I had promised, my life revolved solely around Elizabeth and together we slowly started to heal.
As I said, it was a slow process and I was thankful to Seth for giving us our space and our moments at first and anytime we needed them. It started with Lizzie and I going for a run every morning where she would ask all the question she still had for me and vice versa and then we would have a quiet afternoon on the deck. I would play piano for her for a few hours and I also started tutoring her after a while. She was smart but she still needed to learn, I'm not sure about her going to school yet with her fast growing. But I was able to enroll her in those ballet classes she wanted so much. Since we moved from place to place every two months people wouldn't notice her change and I would just enroll her in another studio.
Then, every night while she was sleeping I would do my research. I looked through thousands of legends, stories and tales looking for anything that would give me an idea for what to expect of Lizzie's future. Her fast growing had slowed down dramatically this past year, but I still worried I wouldn't have much time with her. So it was looking through this stories that I came across with a certain legend, the legend about the Lobishomen, a blood drinker from the deepest rainforests in South America.
According to this legend, the Lobishomen would seek beautiful women through the small towns near the jungles of Brazil. He would lure them in, trick and deceive until eventually they would give themselves to him claiming to be in love with him. As a fateful consequence, the woman would conceive the demon's spawn, who would bit his way out of the mother's womb and killing her in the process.
It was a disturbing tale, but that was what made us leave Isle Esme for the first time after two months of being here and go back to main land in search for answers. That's how we came across Zafrina and her sisters, Kachiri and Senna, who eventually took us to Huilen and her nephew Nahuel.
Nahuel is a one hundred and fifty year old hybrid, his father –a vampire- had acted much like the Lobishomen on these legends. He had tricked his mother into trust him and give herself to him before he disappeared only to come back years after he was born. He had bitten his aunt Huilen as a toddler, -changing her in the process- who raised him to be a good man and now he didn't want to know anything about his father and his experiments on creating a new race, so he stayed with Huilen and the two of them had been living in the Amazon forests since then.
Nahuel was the remedy to all my worries for Lizzie, he had all the answers I needed. He said he reached maturity by the time he was ten and hasn't changed since then, still looking like his sixteen year old self. He also said the fast growing process lessened when he was five, which is what is happening to Lizzie right now. She is five now, but looks like a seven-eight year old and has looked like that for a while now which I'm so thankful for.
See angel? She is going to be fine.
I miss you.
And I love you more than yesterday.
With a heavy sigh, I put my journal back in my bag with the rest of them and head inside to prepare Lizzie's dinner. I've been writing a lot this past year, especially at the beginning while Lizzie slept unless she would wake up screaming calling her mother. I know I have to put a brave face for my little angel, but sometime it's so hard, and it seems like the only way out is through ink and paper. I can't scream, I can't get angry and much less I can't cry. Not if I want Lizzie's life to go back to normal, she can't see me crumble so I write and write.
I'm getting better at it though, -at hiding the pain- but sometimes I wonder if she actually believes me. I feel her pain and see it in her eyes, it's that bond thing so it would only be natural if she could feel mine too, but I never ask her… I don't want to open that door. We try not to talk about her too much, since it hurts us both, but we do sometimes. When Lizzie needs reassurance or she has one of those bad days.
I open the fridge and take out two bags of blood, my throat burns but I ignore it as I pour them into a cup and heat it in the microwave. Since there isn't much wild animal life on the island, when we first got here I hunted for a whole day and gathered as much blood as I could for Lizzie, so we wouldn't have to go back and forth from the isle to main land endangering her by leaving her alone with Seth or by coming with me into the unknown.
"Lizzie!" I call out for her as the microwave dings. "Dinner's ready!"
When I turn around with her cup, she is already there sitting at the breakfast bar.
"You are getting better I truly didn't hear you this time around." I kiss the top of her head as I hand her, her Shrek cup.
"It's easy inside the house," she takes a sip "No leafs or dried sticks get to caught in my feet." She makes a pout and I chuckle remembering the first time I had played the piano for her, when she had sneaked up on me too without me noticing.
"You'll get better at it, you are my daughter after all and I'm an excellent hunter." I winked.
Seth walks in at that moment, he's already so used to Lizzie drinking blood he doesn't even flinch when he sees her blood mustache, and instead he goes straight to the fridge to make himself a sandwich. I take out a napkin and wipe Lizzie's face clean.
"Lizzie, I have one question for you." I hesitate a little.
"Shoot!" She smiles brightly and I roll my eyes playfully at her, knowing she picked up that word from Seth.
"How do you feel about going back to Alberta?"
Seth stiffens for a moment before continuing with his task, but I know his whole attention is on us now, worrying about Lizzie as always. I never thought I'd have so much in common with a wolf. He and I are so overly protective of Elizabeth, but again he knows his place and knows when to step aside which again proves he's an excellent kid.
"Going back?" Lizzie asks in a soft voice.
"Yeah, I thought… I thought it could be good for you. Going back to a routine, you could join a ballet studio for real, and be there long enough to get the chance to perform in the plays."
She looked up curiously at me.
"Like in a theater?"
"Yes," I smiled at her "and… now that your growing has slowed down… wouldn't you like to join school for a while? Meet other kids your physical age? Play with them and learn new things?"
By the look in her eyes I knew she loved the idea, a lot. But something was still making her hesitate.
"What is it?" I nudged her "You know you can tell me anything."
She touched my hand and showed me Rosalie's face.
"Don't worry about her. She won't come near you, she knows better now."
She pursed her lips.
"I do miss Alice… she is nice, and Esme is so sweet." She said before shutting her mouth and frowning.
I look curiously at her, when she doesn't speak again I get more curious.
"Lizzie, is something wrong with Aunt Alice or Esme?" I sat her in my lap but again she didn't say anything.
I gave Seth a look, understanding what I meant he stepped out of the kitchen and walked back outside.
"What's wrong angel." I brushed her hair away from her face.
"You think mommy would be mad at me?" She asked with a tiny voice and my eyebrows shot up.
"Why would she be mad at you?"
She touched my face.
Bella brushing Lizzie's hair, then Bella's face becomes blurry and it's replace by Alice's.
Bella singing to Lizzie, then the voice changes into Esme's.
"You are worried you will be replacing your mom?" I ask, finally understanding.
She nods.
"And you think she'll be mad about it." I stated the obvious.
She nods again looking down.
"Elizabeth, no matter how many other women are in your life, no one will ever take your mother's place. She has a special place in your heart, am I right?"
A single tear falls down her cheek and I hug her harder.
"Alice and Esme are part of your life, they are your family too. Of course they'll step in and do things that are supposed to be for your mommy, but that's just because is their job as Aunt and… grandmother" I guessed that was Esme's role "You still need a woman figure, no matter how hard I try there are some parts of your life that I'll never be able to fulfill."
"Alice was your mom's best friend, and Esme loved her like a daughter. Bella trusted them, and I'm sure she is glad you have them to guide you while she can't. So don't feel guilty about it." I caressed her hair.
"You promise?" She asked in a tiny voice.
"I swear," I kissed her tears away "So, what do you think about going back? Are you ready? We can stay here another year if you want."
She shook her head.
"I want to go to school… and I want you to be able to take me to school." She said, knowing if she went to school here I wouldn't be able to take her because of the sun.
Thankfully, for her ballet lessons I had found studios where they have classes during the late afternoon -just when the sun was coming down- for girls her age whose moms would have to work during the day and couldn't bring them then.
"Then it's settled, we'll leave in two days. We can make a stop in New York, to buy you new clothes for school, a backpack and maybe a new pair of ballet shoes? Would you like that?"
He face instantly lit up.
"Can we make them green again?"
"Of course, anything you want." I chuckled, remembering the distraught faces all her teachers have made when they saw her green ballet shoes. Apparently pink was the rule but after I donated a few thousand dollars they never said anything again. Besides we would only be in a city for a couple of months, so is not like it would be a huge deal for them and I just wanted Lizzie to be happy. So, no matter how crazy her whishes were, I made them all true.
I loved to spoil my daughter, but she was also Bella's daughter so she still valued things and would never be a brat. She was still as sweet, innocent and good as the first time I met her. Sure, now she is way different from the scared little girl I met a year and a half ago as she is more talkative and open now but the sweet manor and innocence remained.
She was my sweet little angel.
She is as weird and unpredictable as you angel, I'm glad. Sometimes I feel as if some part of you were still here, through her. I'll see you in her eyes, her mannerism, her personality and other times… I feel as if you aren't gone at all. It's weird, that feeling in my chest. I searched about it and some psychology books say it's normal for people to not let go of a deceased loved one when you never saw the body, when you didn't have closure. So I guess that's it.
"Thank you daddy!" She kissed my cheek.
2 days later…
"Don't let go of my hand, Ok?" I tell Lizzie as we step out of the cab. We are in New York now, it's already dark and we are about to go into a crowded mall. The plane for Calgary leaves at 6 a.m. so we decided to go do the shopping I promised her before having to head back to the airport. Seth stayed at the hotel for a nap and taking care of the luggage, but I knew the real reason he stayed was to give Lizzie and me some time alone before all the chaos when we get home.
"Can we go to the Disney store?"
"Sure, after we get you new clothes. Your jeans look like capris now."
"Won't Aunt Ali get mad at us for not inviting her?"
I chuckled.
"I'm sure she'll use it as an excuse for you owing her a shopping trip. So don't worry about it." I calmed her worries.
In the end, I'm sure Alice would still take her to Calgary for a shopping trip no matter if we had stopped here or not, claiming she missed a good year of shopping with her.
We had previously stopped at a famous ballet shoe store in Long Island called Freed of London, where I had specially ordered a pair of custom made green ballet shoes for Elizabeth. They make them there at the store so it shouldn't have been a problem, the problem was that I insisted on green satin instead of pink, red or black which are the common ones. The designer had stared at me as if I was crazy but I didn't care. In the end, money can move mountains so now we had to head back in three hours to pick up three pair of custom made green ballet shoes from one the best suppliers in the world.
I know, with Lizzie's fast growing she might get rid of them in three months but that's why I ordered three pairs, one of her right size and the other two a little bigger. In the end all the hassle was worth it when I saw Lizzie's big smile after we left the store.
Now, I let Lizzie guide us around the mall, going into the stores that caught her attention and getting her a few things she liked. Then I took her to Neiman Marcus where I had a buyer's assistant pick up a bunch of clothes for her. Lizzie didn't like trying on all the clothes, but when I promised to take her to the Disney Store right after this she stopped complaining.
"You are a great brother." The sale's lady smiles at me when I encourage Lizzie to try on another pair of Mary Janes. "It's so nice of you to take the time and do all this for her. It must be so annoying for you."
"He's not my brother, he's my dad." Lizzie suddenly scowls at her making me chuckle, I was used to this. "And he says I'm his only girl, so move on." She finishes with a firm nod.
Pretty soon after we left Alberta, I learned that Lizzie could be quiet possessive. She'll get all jealous when another woman would talk to me. I thought it was cute as hell.
"Oops, sorry." The lady blushed before going back to bring another pair of shoes.
"God a daddy, he is so hot, a total DILF! Maybe if I play nice with the girl…"
I turned back to Lizzie, who was throwing daggers at her retreating from and smirked.
"That's right," I winked at her "You are my one and only, but you already know that so there's no need to be rude to the poor woman." I chuckled at her kitty like temper. "What did she ever do to you?"
She crossed her arms across her chest. The posture immediately reminding me of my angel I had tu look away. It hurt so much.
"I don't like her, she stared at you funny and she mostly picked up dresses! Pink dresses!" she made a mortified face and I had to laugh. She is the only one that can make me laugh of course.
"I think they look cute on you," I kissed the top of her head "but I'll tell her to pick up something sportier too."
"Can I pick something on my own?" Her anger was gone, and now she was all smiles and sweets again. I'm beginning to think she also got my –what Bella called once- mood swings.
"Sure." I shrugged taking her hand and helping her stand up from the chair. We looked around for a little while, -while the assistant followed us- until her eyes fell on a pair of red chucks.
"Look daddy! These are like yours!" she was excited.
I looked down to see my old pair of red converse and chuckled.
"You are right." I lightly kicked her butt with my toes making her giggle.
"Can I have them?" She asked with bright eyes "They are so cool!"
"Oh honey, you don't want those." The sale's lady interrupted "Those are for boys." She made a face. "A pretty girl like you wouldn't like to look like a boy, would you?"
"I wonder if there's a mom… well she looks like a freaking tomboy now so I guess not."
Lizzie looked down disappointed, and I hated that. I stared at her sad face for a whole minute as the sale's lady whose name tag read Jennifer parroted about only god knows what, the only thing I knew was that she was getting a customer's complaint for insulting my daughter.
"Would you give us a moment please?" I interrupted her with a cold voice.
So what if she likes to wear jeans and hoodies when Alice is not around? They are comfortable for her and that makes her happy, not a tomboy and if she was, so what? She is perfect in my eyes and I was glad I didn't have to figure out how to make pig tails and braids when we left Alberta. I had enough trouble with her ballet buns thank you very much.
"Sure." Jennifer smiled at me again before walking back to the cashier.
"Maybe if I give him a discount? No, that wouldn't impress him by the piles of clothes he is getting her he must be loaded."
I took the chucks and sat on a nearby chair with Lizzie on my lap.
"Try these on." I ordered her but she shook her head. "Why not?" I lifted her chin so she would look like me.
"They are for boys."
"So? You like them you should do and wear what makes you happy."
"But… I don't want to be weirder."
"You are not weird," I told her sternly, we have gone through this a bunch of times in the past too "You are unique, special and perfect." I reminded her.
She bit her lip.
"Elizabeth? Repeat after me."
When she didn't say anything I tickled her tummy.
"I'm unique, special and perfect!" she giggled our little mantra for every time she got upset about things like this, and just like that my little angel was back.
"Good," I beamed at her "now try these on, and I think they have them in green too."
About half an hour later, we walked out of the store in step with each other with nothing but our matching red chucks and headed towards Gap Kids on the next corner.
It was 8:30 in the morning in Calgary when we finally descended. Lizzie was fast asleep with her head in my lap as Seth quietly snored in the back seat. I stood up and carefully cradled my daughter in my arms so to not wake her up and lightly kicked Seth's leg to alert him that we had arrived.
We made our way to baggage claim and picked up our things, which were a lot since we had been gone for a little more than a year and with our last stop in New York, I had to buy even more bags to fit it all in. Lizzie woke up sometime during the line in customs.
I wasn't surprised by our reception when we got out of the terminal, as I predicted Alice must have seen everyone disappear and that's how they knew we were finally coming back. Even without my gift I could sense Alice's excitement and Esme's joy.
As soon as we came into view, Alice squealed running towards us. Picking up Lizzie from the floor and hugging her tightly, Esme was not far behind.
"Oh my god Lizzie! Look how much you have grown! You look so beautiful!" Esme could barely contain her happiness. "You are not a little baby anymore, although I'm sure your dad disagrees!"
Lizzie blushed and pressed herself against my side, hugging my leg.
"Of course," I smiled down at her "she'll always be my little princess." I caressed her hair proudly.
"Oh Edward!" Now Esme threw herself at me "We have missed you so much too! I'm so glad you are finally home." She cried.
"I missed you too, mom." I kissed her cheek, a knot formed in my throat feeling bad now about leaving for so long but I had to do it for Lizzie. Hopefully things will be better now.
"Son," Carlisle opened up his arms for me "welcome back."
"Thanks." I hugged him tightly, I had really missed my family. "Where's Rosalie?" I asked in a whisper then, since everyone was here but her.
Event Emmett came, he was bouncing in excitement waiting for Esme to be done with Lizzie so he could welcome her too.
"Esme forbid her to come, she also already told her not to come near her until you allow it."
I nodded feeling like a weight had been thrown away from my shoulders. I didn't want to deal with Rosalie, I was glad Esme had foreseen this, although I still felt like ripping her head off for what she did last time.
We all packed in different cars, of course everyone wanted to go in the same car as Lizzie. I loved how my entirely family were going out of their way to make her feel welcomed and loved. In the end, Esme, Alice, Carlisle Lizzie and I went in Carlisle's car and the rest in Emmett's jeep. Seth decided to run he wanted to stretch a little since he hadn't been able to phase in two months since we got back to Isle Esme.
The entire ride home, Alice talked Lizzie's ear off, telling her about her newly redecorated room. Since now she knew Lizzie wasn't really a fan of pink she changed it to a combination of greens and reds. By her thoughts, I knew Lizzie was going to love it.
By the time we arrived to the house, it was already ten in the morning. Carlisle had to stick to the speed limit because of the snow. It was the end of February so the snow covered sidewalks and frozen roads were normal.
As I predicted, Lizzie loved her new room, and Alice was over the moon when she saw Lizzie's big smile. She thanked Alice but was still a little guarded, no doubt still thinking she was betraying Bella which was silly. Neither Alice nor Esme were like Rosalie, they'd never even dream of taking Bella's place in Lizzie's heart.
Alice also had prepared a welcome back party, between her and Esme they had prepared all of Elizabeth's favorite snacks and foods, as well as Seth's and had balloons, ribbons and flowers all over the place. A huge welcome home sign above the chimney and next to it a table full of gifts.
Lizzie stayed by my side most of the morning, and I was content to be with her. Sometime during the afternoon Alice finally convinced her to play scrabble with her, Jasper and Emmett. Carlisle watched them from the couch and Esme kept refilling her cup with apple juice and bringing different sweets for her.
Discretely, I left the living room wanting to leave her with her family alone for a while so she'd grow more comfortable with them. I walked back to the front living room, where my piano sat. My green piano. I chuckled without humor when I saw it, remembering that morning when Lizzie and I painted it. I felt my throat closing, as that had also been the morning half of me died.
I sat on the stool and lifted the fall, I stroked the keys as I stared at the pictures over the closed lid.
I miss you.
Listening Lizzie's laugh at the end of the hall, my mind wandered to the enormous pain I felt right now seeing these pictures. The pictures of Lizzie as a newborn in Bella's arms, as a toddler, as an infant. I'll never be able to forgive myself for leaving, I know I'm paying the consequences but no matter how much pain I suffer I'll still never be able to forgive myself. Especially because of all the pain I put Lizzie through.
"I'm so sorry angel." I whispered, my thumb caressing her face over her picture. She was so beautiful, I was so glad Lizzie had her eyes so I wouldn't miss them that much. Although it will still hurt every time I looked at them. I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose when a new wave of pain hit.
"Please angel, give me strength." I begged in a whisper, hopefully she'd hear me. "I love you, more than yesterday." I don't know how that is possible but it is.
I rested my forehead on the music rack and closed my eyes again, giving into the pain. It was at times like this when I was alone when I would let the pain wash over me. When I would let myself crumble, when I was sure my daughter wouldn't see or hear me.
Angel… why? Why did you give up?
I never thought the "S" word could be so hard to pronounce, even in my mind I couldn't think about it. The image of the blood dripping from her wrists is an image I wouldn't ever be able to get rid of, an image I'd have to learn to live with. It haunts me every time I close my eyes, every time I blink. And every time I see it, it only fuels the burning sensation in my chest.
I hear Esme coming to into the living room I sit back straight and try to compose my face. But I know I didn't fool her even one bit, she stares at me with a pained expression and that's when I see I'm not the only one.
Esme is suffering too the death of her daughter, it's the second time she has lost a child in her eyes. She doesn't say anything aloud, we just stare at each other, and she shows me how last year has been for everyone. She tells me Lizzie and I aren't alone, I'm glad they are here for Lizzie I just wish it was enough to take her pain away.
"Everything will be Ok." She whispers coming into the room and I scoff.
"I've been saying that to myself for the last fourteen months and nothing changes."
"You have to have faith." She sits next to me and I roll my eyes. "God-"
"I don't think he ever listens to our kind or our prayers," I interrupted her "at least not mine."
"But he still gave you Lizzie… What do you call her? Little angel?"
I nodded.
"See? He didn't leave you alone."
I look down again, swallowing the knot in my throat.
"He still took her away."
"God works in mysterious ways… maybe he had another plan for you two."
"Bella was my only plan. The three of us." I say angrily.
"Well, as much as it pains me to say this… you need a new plan. You are back, what are you planning to do with Lizzie? You don't expect her to be in the house all day for eternity right?"
I was glad for the change of topic, I needed the distraction before the need for screaming over powered me.
"No, of course not. I'm going to enroll her in first grade, I'll look through private schools tonight and she wants to continue with her ballet lessons. She's pretty good." I smiled proudly at the last part.
"I can imagine," She smiled back "and enrolling her into school is a great idea, it will give her a sense of normalcy."
I can't believe my little angel will be starting school soon, she is growing up so soon. God angel, you should had been here too, both of us watching her grow, taking her to school for the first time…
"She needs a routine I can help you with that." Esme continued.
"Thanks, Seth and I had enough of a hard time trying to get her ballet buns right. I mastered it, but poor Seth still can't do it without pulling her hair too tight." I chuckled humorlessly "I'm sure she'll be glad she has you and Alice now for feminine stuff."
"I'd love to help you with that, and seriously Edward you have done a wonderful job. She is so different from when she first got here. I think this year worked wonders for your relationship. She loves you so much I can tell by the way she always looks at you when she does something, as if wanting your approval."
I smile as I stare down the hallway where I can still hear her giggles in amusement at Emmett and Jasper's banter. They are overdoing it just for her.
"I know, I've noticed it. She thinks there's something wrong with her since she's one of a kind. I'm trying to get her to accept herself and what she is."
Esme sighs dramatically.
"She sounds awfully similar to someone I know." She elbows me playfully and I laugh.
"Touché."
Just then, Seth burst into the foyer from the front door. He is crying and his face looks distraught.
"Seth? Are you Ok?" I ask, immediately on my feet. My family kept distracting Lizzie in the other living room but I know they are paying attention to us too.
Seth looks torn, staring at the end of the hallway where Lizzie is picking her letters oblivious to us.
"What's the matter?" I asked him in a low voice so Lizzie wouldn't hear as I walk us out of the house.
"I just talked to Emily…" He sobs.
"And?"
"I decided to call Mom and Leah, to tell them I might visit soon. I haven't talked to anyone from the rez since we left… I just told mom we would leave for a while and that I'd be Ok, since I didn't know where we'd be I didn't promise to call. So I just called to check in."
"So she's mad you didn't call?" I asked not understanding, he was so distraught his thoughts didn't make sense.
"No, I didn't talk to her she wasn't home neither was Leah. So I called Emily to see if they were at her house." He cried sitting on a fallen tree at the edge of the woods. "I just found out Rebecca died."
"Who's Rebecca?"
"Jacob's older sister… she lived in Seattle, she went to U-Dub."
"I'm sorry, where you close to her?"
That was a stupid question, by his behavior it was obvious they were.
"Yeah, she was Leah's age… but she was closer to Emily. She used to babysit me. Damn, I feel so selfish and guilty… I should have called sooner. I didn't know." He cried.
"It's Ok Seth, I'm sure you can still make the burial?"
"Edward… she died a year ago, that's why I feel like crap."
Oh.
"I can't believe I didn't know! I was so worried about Lizzie… I should have called more often!"
"Seth, it wasn't your fault… we were away, I'm sure Jacob will understand." I placed my hand on his shoulder to comfort him.
Seth and I had truly become good friends this past year, both of us dedicating every breath we took to Lizzie. It really pained me to see him like this.
"I really hope so, I tried his phone and Leah's but they have them off. Emily said he's gone, he left shortly after the burial and Leah hasn't been around the rez too much lately, she thinks Jacob is still having trouble accepting it. He hasn't reported with the pack in a while either. He left Sam in charge until he came back."
"You should go home."
"What?"
I shrugged.
"Jacob obviously needs you, and I know you miss your family… we'll be here I won't take her away I promise."
"Are you serious?" He asked hopeful.
"Go find Jacob, be there for your friend."
"Are you sure? I mean, we just got here… Lizzie might get overwhelmed…"
"She'll understand, just talk to her. Besides, it will only be a few weeks right?" I asked, I knew what a long separation would do to Lizzie and I wanted to make sure he wouldn't be gone for too long. I have come to terms with their imprinting a while ago, even though I still don't like it -no matter how good of a kid Seth is- I know Seth is good for my daughter.
"I promise."
I nodded.
"I'll go and buy you a plane ticket, pack your stuff and come inside to say goodbye to Elizabeth."
"Thank you Edward, seriously."
"Don't even mention it I owe you way more than a plane ticket."
As the cab pulls out of the driveway with Seth in it, I head back inside. With so much going on, I don't think Lizzie even processed that Seth was leaving for a while. She was having such a good time with her Uncles that there wasn't much space in her mind to feel saddened. Seth was happy about it, not wanting to ruin her party, so after an "I'll be back soon" he hurriedly walked outside to the waiting cab. Poor kid was still devastated about Rebecca. My guess is that they tried to reach him while we were away and because we didn't have cell phones with us, only mine for an emergency they couldn't contact him.
Poor Jacob, I knew what it was to lose someone you love. Someone so close to you, I could empathize with him although I'm sure his pain is not even an inch of mine. Now, if it had been Leah -his mate- instead of his sister that would be a different story.
I reclined against the wall, watching my daughter transform into a little boy like her Uncles. Jasper and Emmet where teaching her how to play video games on their Nintendo 64, they say the oldies are the best ones and I agree with them.
"There you go mini-bell! A, A, A,! Don't stop pushing the A!" Jasper coached her.
"Hey!" Emmett shouted back "Stop it, that's not fair!"
"Are you scared of a little girl?" Jasper smirked and Emmett grunted before get let out a groan.
"YES!" Jasper threw his fists in the air.
"Aww Damn it!" Emmett threw a cushion against the wall.
"I won?!" Lizzie asked incredulous, with a smile slowly spreading over her gorgeous face.
"Yes you did!"
Lizzie turned around, no doubt looking for me.
"Daddy!" She beamed running towards me. "Did you see that?! I won!"
I laughed as I picked her up.
"Yes I did! I'm so proud of you!" I threw her in the air.
"This proves it, you suck! A five year old beat you!" Jasper continued teasing Emmett.
"I want a rematch! It doesn't count, you were distracting me. Cheater!" Emmett accused him.
"What did I do now?!"
"All right," I told Lizzie "why don't we leave the crazies behind and get you ready for bed, huh?"
She nodded as a yawn escaped her.
"Would you stay with me?"
"Don't I always?" I kissed her nose.
As I ascended the stairs, I caught a glimpse of Rosalie going into her room. She has been up here all day, and I don't care. As long as she doesn't speak or stand to close to my daughter I don't care what she does.
When I open the door to Lizzie's room, Esme comes out of her bathroom with a soft smile.
"I prepared you a bubble bath, is that Ok sweetie?"
Lizzie looks up to me in question.
"I've heard that's fun," I tell her "why doesn't grandmaEsme help you get ready for bed tonight while I do a few things I have to get to."
I thought if I referred to Esme as grandma, then Lizzie would start seeing her like that and she wouldn't have a problem anymore about thinking she is replacing Bella for someone else.
"Grandma?"
"Yes, she is my mother, remember?"
She looks back at Esme with new eyes.
"You can call me nana too, grandmother can be a mouthful and it's not out of place if you call me like that out in public." She winked.
"I like nana." She said in a tiny voice.
"Well, then would you like for your nana to give you a bath tonight? I'll be one floor down in Carlisle's study."
"Ok." She said quietly.
Esme beamed.
"Good! Now, let me show you everything Aunt Ali and I got for you. We have bubbles, sponges, toys…"
After that, I quietly left the room. I intended to go onto my laptop to start looking for references for schools in the town's nearby and for ballet studios in Calgary, but when I passed Alice's room, I saw her sitting by her window sill with a concerned look on her face.
"Alice? Why are you alone in the dark?"
She didn't answer, I tried to see her mind but everything was black, then a rush of images. It didn't make sense at all.
"Alice." I called a little louder making her jump in her seat. That was weird, I thought she had heard me come in?
"Alice? Are you alright?"
"Yeah," she shook her head "sorry… uhm."
"What's the matter?"
"Something's changing."
"What's changing?"
"I don't know, I can feel it but can't see it… it's all just a blur but, I don't know."
I frowned and sat on the couch next to the window.
"What are you talking about?"
"This afternoon, when Seth decided to leave… something changed."
I stiffened.
"You think something is going to happen to him?" I whispered, not wanting Lizzie to hear.
Alice's eyes widened.
"No! Well… maybe? I don't know, it's just… I don't understand. I thought the same at first so I tried to look into his future but I couldn't see him."
"What?!" I whispered yell.
Is something going to happen to Seth?! I need to go after him, the plane doesn't leave in another hour, I think I can still make it.
"No Edward it's not that… I think, I think I've never been able to see him in the first place?"
I knew I had a stupid expression in my face.
"What?"
"Well, as soon as he decided to leave I started getting all this weird images… like static in a television, I too thought it had something to do with Seth but when I tried to see his future everything was black, even when his life isn't tangled with Lizzie's anymore since he is gone I can't see him."
"I can't see his future anymore than I can see Lizzie's. So I got scared and tried to see Jacob and Sam's future since I've encountered them before and the same thing happened. I can't see any of them… I can't see any of the wolves."
"And you just realized this now?" I asked incredulous.
"I know, it's strange. I think, since Lizzie has been with them all this time I thought it was because of her I never saw them or Seth when he came to live here. I thought it was Lizzie all the time."
She shook her head, trying to see again.
"I can't believe I never noticed." She sighed in defeat and frustration.
"Well, to be fair you didn't have a reason to look into Seth's future, since you assumed you couldn't because of Lizzie."
She shrugged.
…
…
…
"So this… change, it doesn't have to do with Seth, then?" I asked again as she tried to see once again in vain.
"I don't know… it happened when he decided to leave though."
I frown.
"But, do you think is dangerous?" I immediately worried over Lizzie. "Maybe is Victoria playing with your visions again?"
"We are not sure if she knows how to block me and I still don't think Laurent would play Irina like that, we are her family and she is his mate."
"She could have still figured it out on her own."
She was shaking her head before I had finished.
"Probably but no. This doesn't have to do anything with Victoria, I'm watching her she is somewhere around Montana. I'll see her when she decides to come."
"So what do you see?"
"I think I see you… yeah, I think you are there but you are so blury… I only see static… Funny," she chuckled without humor "it reminds me of the first vision I had of you and Bella in your meadow."
I ignored her last comment.
"Alice, concentrate… I need to know what you see, for Lizzie's sake."
She closed her eyes again, but there was only static again.
"I don't know, but something big is coming, I feel it."
I frowned, worried as hell for my daughter.
"Is it good or bad?"
…
…
…
"I don't know."
Phew! That was quiet a time jump but you know how this things are, some people needed a little time to heal ;)
Please please please review! I want to know what you think about Daddyward! How cute are they both with their red chucks huh? And poor Lizzie she still thinks she is weird!
Now, Rebecca huh? That's interesting don't you think?
Till next time!
Saludos!
tpec