My beta is back! So this chapter is finally fixed! Thank you for your patience!

What? 3 chapters in seven days? Yeah, that's right ;) (I'm still kind of sick if you wanted to know)

Anyway... OMG GOD GUYS! THANK YOU SOO MUCH FOR YOUR REVIEWS THE RECCS AND FOLLOWS! You are amazing!

Now, the Obssesed1 sent me the correct link for the bone marrow donors: www().()marrow().().org

Thank you so much for the amazing response, and for everyone who shared their own story about them or a family dealing with this horrible disease. I'm sorry and my prayers are with you! Hopefully it'll get better!

WARNING: Team Bella, I highly recommend you to go and grab your pom poms, horns and cheerleaders' outfits! As for Team Edward, just a box of tissues will be enough.

Also, I used some of New Moon's dialogue since it's based on that book, I just twisted it a little bit for fun! Let's see who can remember the lines!

Again I took some creative license with Bella's sickness, I did my research but I'm still not a doctor so... *shrugs*

Again, my betta is on Spring Break so all mistakes are mine!

SM owns everything!

P.S. I love this chapter's song, if you have time to hear it I recommend it and it fits the chapter perfectly!

Chapter 16: A Twist In My Story

"A Twist In My Story" – Secondhand Serenade

Slow down, the world isn't watching us break down
It's safe to say we are alone now, we're alone now
Not a whisper, the only noise is the receiver
I'm counting the seconds until you break the silence
So please just break the silence

The whispers turn to shouting
The shouting turns to tears
Your tears turn into laughter
And it takes away our fears

So you see, this world doesn't matter to me
I'll give up all I had just to breathe
The same air as you till the day that I die
I can't take my eyes off of you

I'm finally waking up, a twist in my story
It's time I open up, and let your love right through me
I'm finally waking up, a twist in my story
It's time I open up, and let your love right through me
That's what you get
When you see your life in someone else's eyes
That's what you get, that's what you get

You know those moments, when everything stops… where nothing else exists but the sight in front of you? The sight, so beautiful you are blinded and awestruck by its brightness? Those moments, where you don't see or hear anything else, when your whole body stops functioning and your own instincts shut down? A meteor could have crashed the place, but you still wouldn't notice?

A special moment a slight twist of fate that changes the whole course of your entire life. These kind of moments, are the ones that stay engraved in your memories for ever. The moments where you instantly know that your life will never be the same again.

Yeah, I'm having one of those moments.

"Momma! Momma!" Lizzie cried hysterically, but her cries were far away at the back of my mind, barely registering. My sole focus was on the beautiful angel in front of me.

"Shh… it's Ok baby, I'm here… I'm here." The angel was on her knees, holding our daughter tight to her chest as if her life depended on it.

I was a block of ice, people started moving around me. Leaving the theater probably to go and pick up their daughters, I don't know and I don't care, but for the life of me I couldn't do anything but stare. I was awestruck, not believing what my eyes were seeing, afraid that if I blinked she'll be gone and everything would have been a dream, an illusion.

I was sure it was an illusion, I was almost a hundred percent sure it was. A beautiful illusion that I knew my chest and heart will pay dearly for it in a few seconds when it's gone.

"No! I'm dreaming!"

"God… Lizzie, open your eyes honey…" Lizzie shook her head stubbornly "Elizabeth, open your eyes, oh god baby look at you! You've gotten so big!" The angel laughed through her tears, the sound was so beautiful my mind couldn't have come up with it in its own.

But, how? She couldn't be here… what's going on? Did I finally lose it? Did I reach my point?

"Momma, d-don't go!"

"Shh… I'm here, please look at me! Shh… it's Ok, I'm here honey." She shook her shoulders lightly "Lizzibizzi, listen to me, open your eyes baby. It's really me." The divine figure started pampering her face with kisses, but Lizzie got a hold of her again.

"No!"

"Oh god," She hugged her tighter once again "Lizzie, please baby let me see your face" She kissed her cheeks again "I'm here, see?" She sobbed brushing Lizzie's hair away from her face. "I'm so sorry baby, please… open your eyes for me. Let me see your beautiful face, I-I missed you so much."

Slowly, as if in fear… Lizzie finally opened her eyes and more tears filled them.

"Momma?" She cried.

"Yes, that's me." She brushed Lizzie's tears away with her thumbs, holding her face with her hands "You were so wonderful up there… I'm so proud of you!"

"I-I… mo-omma… I…" Lizzie touched the angel's cheek who held her hand tightly against her skin.

"Shh… I know honey," She placed a lock of hair behind Lizzie's ear "I love you too." She kissed her forehead and then stared into each other's eyes for a long moment, as if having a private conversation.

"You are here?" The angel nodded "You are really here?! Oh!" Lizzie let out another gasp as the angel's smile grew wider, the sight struck me hard, leaving me breathless and lightheaded "You are here! You are here! Daddy!" Lizzie whirled around looking for me "Momma's here! Momma's here!"

And that's when our eyes met, for the first time in over four years.

Her eyes were as beautiful as I remembered them, the same shade of chocolate brown as our daughter's, overall… besides the fewer pounds on her she was exactly as the last time I saw her, porcelain skin, flushed full cheeks, strawberry-pink lips… the only difference was her hair's length. It was shorter, barely passing her chin but it was still thick and shiny as always.

But the best part, the part that made me want to scream and sing of joy was the sound of her strong, beating heart. The tangible evidence that she was really here, alive.

My angel.

She's here.

And I still couldn't move, afraid the spell would break.

She slowly stood from the floor, not letting go of Lizzie's hands who wouldn't take her eyes away from her, fearing she would disappear too, as if she was just a fidget of her imagination.

But she wasn't, she was real… the strong beating of her heart is a sound I'll recognize everywhere, she was here. I knew that sound, I knew her heartbeat better than myself… I even had composed a lullaby in sync to that same heartbeat.

She's here.

"Hello, Edward."

And that did it. The sound of my name, falling from her lips made wake up from my daze. I gasped, my face no doubt crumbling from the waves of pain I felt making up a storm inside of me.

With purpose, I walked in a straight line towards her. Every inch that brought me closer to her felt so painfully good and liberating. When I wrapped my arms around her, it was as if my heart had sprung to life, as if suddenly it had started beating again. As if the weight of the world had finally left my tired shoulders. Adrenaline raced through my veins, and there was something inside of me fighting with all its will to come out from my body and I instantly knew what it was.

It was my old self, fighting to finally come out.

I was finally waking up, I finally felt alive after more than a hundred years.

"Bella." I croaked, burying my face in her hair.

She stiffened in my embrace, but I was so overwhelmed, my mind was a total chaos I didn't stop to think about what it meant.

"Oh, god… thank god." I closed my eyes.

My throat burned, it felt as if a hot iron was pressed against it but I didn't care. I welcomed the pain, this pain meant that she was really here. She was alive, warm, breathing, blood pumping through her veins, human and beautiful. And that was all I cared about right now, her beating heart.

With more care than ever, as if I was holding the most delicate glass, I held her face and kissed her cheeks, nose, forehead, every place I could reach but her lips. Knowing if I did, I would never be able to let them go, and I had so many questions. But then I thought… what the hell? I'll ask them later. I needed to kiss her, but just when I was about to lean in…

"Edward," Bella interrupted my advances and I wanted to scream again in joy when I heard her voice mixed with my name once again, her soft voice soothing my tormenting soul "stop, I'm fine."

"B-but, how?" I threaded my fingers through her hair, brushing the short strands away from her cheeks "I don't understand… Alice?"

I forced myself to look back at my sister for a second, -whose face was a mix of shock, pain and utter happiness, just as the rest of my family- and Bella took the chance to disentangle herself from me and step back, pulling Lizzie between us by wrapping her arms around her. I quickly turned around and frowned at her, hating the loss of contact. My arms felt colder than they already naturally were and most of all… empty.

"I got a bone marrow transplant," Bella explained "I couldn't come back until I was cleared and fully recovered… in case of, you know… something went wrong."

"What about the call? Paul? The hospital?" I asked with a shaking voice, this was so much and I needed so many answers. "Why didn't you call?"

"I think I can explain that." Seth cut in, my mind had only centered on her, feeling her presence, her warmth and drowning myself into her scent that I didn't noticed him and Jacob - who was glaring at my entire vampire family - until now. "But, I think this is not the best place for it." He looked around.

That's when I realized, half of the audience was still inside the theater. Then I became worried, and scanned their thoughts for any suspicions but most of them only found it cute and adorable that a little girl jumped down from the stage and run towards her mother, probably having stage fright.

When I knew everything was ok, I turned back around and went for Bella's hand, longing for the contact, I needed to touch her, to make sure I wasn't imagining things but when I was about to take it she quickly started playing with Lizzie's ringlets that were falling at the sides of her face. Her rejection was like as if a bucket of ice cold water had been poured on me.

"Bella?" I frowned, searching her eyes again.

Now that I was kind of out of my shock, I took the time to really see her. Aside from the shorter hair, physically she was the same… but there was something different in her demeanor, in her stance. She seemed… careful, distant and… cold? Wait, why did she stepped away from me?

"Bella? Are you Ok?" I reached out to touch her cheek but she turned away to look at my family, she still had a hold on Lizzie who still wouldn't take her eyes out of her mother.

"Hi." Bella gave them a tight lipped smile, and I was even more worried now. Was she feeling ill? Did something bother her?

"BELLA!" Alice cried throwing her arms around her. Bella froze again, her eyes wide in shock at Alice's exuberance. "Oh my god! Thank god, thank god! I missed you so much sister!"

Reluctantly, one of Bella's arms let go of Lizzie and she gave Alice half a hug patting her back.

"It's good to see you too, Alice." She said simply.

What the hell?

Something was wrong, I knew it. I felt it in my gut.

Alice too sensed that something was off, so she stepped back to look at her closely but again Bella avoided her gaze and turned to Esme who was about to burst out of her own body if she didn't get to hug Bella anytime soon.

Alice and I shared a look, wondering what was wrong. Alice tried to see the future but with the wolves and Lizzie in our lives now it was impossible.

"Oh my god, Bella." Esme wrapped her arms around Bella in a motherly gesture and Bella's shoulders relaxed a little. Her smile now was more genuine.

Suddenly, my whole family was surrounding us and Bella tensed again. Even Emmet noticed her hesitation so everyone stepped back awkwardly but Esme, who hugged her again, not wanting to let go of who she thought of as her own daughter.

"We thought you were gone? You have no idea how glad we are that's not the case." She pulled away to hold Bella's face between her hands. "Thank god you are Ok! You are Ok, right?" Esme asked her seriously and Bella's eyes filled with tears again.

"I know, and yes… I'm Ok now, better than Ok" She looked down to our daughter who had the side of her face pressed against her stomach "I can explain… I'm so sorry it took me so long to come."

"What happened? Why didn't you call before?" I asked, if only so she could look at me again so I could try to figure out what was bothering her, but her eyes on me only lasted a second as she looked at something behind us. We all turned around and saw the Denali's and Rose approach hesitantly, but stayed several feet away not wanting to scare Bella and also hesitant about the werewolves so close to us.

I was desperate, my arms literally ached in need of holding her again but something told me to be careful.

"Bella," Carlisle started, his voice was thick with emotion as he tried to hide it. He was as overwhelmed as everyone else and took a breath before continuing "These are our cousins from Alaska, that's Tanya and her sister Kate, and that's Carmen and Eleazar."

"It's nice to meet you." Bella said politely, but her eyes were as guarded as before. Probably because she didn't know them therefore she might be scared.

"No, it's our pleasure. We've heard so much about you," Tanya said with kind eyes "we are so glad to know you are Ok, your loss was very hard on our cousins. You have no idea what you being here means to them." Tanya's eyes flickered to mine and I know she was talking about me. I smiled at her in thanks and looked back at Bella, whose eyes quickly turned back to Tanya.

"I can imagine." She was about to say something else but Jacob interrupted, talking for the first time since he got here.

"Bella, it's almost six you need to eat." Jacob gave her a meaningful look, basically reminding her that she had to take care of herself now that she was finally with Lizzie, but Bella glared at him before rolling her eyes and chuckling.

"Are you hungry?" I asked her immediately, maybe this was what was bothering her.

"No, I'm fine… Jacob is just being overprotecting, that's it."

Jacob scoffed.

"Overprotective? I'm letting her do this craziness. We should have gone with my plan. Take Lizzie and leave, but of course she never listens to me-"

His thoughts made me see red.

"Elizabeth is not going anywhere." I growled at him and everybody tensed, my family standing straight and closer to us on guard.

"Stay out of my mind leech! And you have no power over he-" He hissed back but Seth stepped in before I could launch myself at him.

"Jacob! Not now." He tried to reason but Jacob ignored him and looked back at Bella.

"I told you this was crazy, I'm not letting you go on with this madness. We should go now."

"I don't want to leave daddy!" Lizzie cried, jumping to my arms and I hold her tight as Bella glared at Jacob.

"What madness is he talking about?" I asked getting really angry at this mongrel. Who now hid his thoughts by singing some 80's song in his mind.

Bella ignored my question and stood on her toes to kiss Lizzie's forehead.

"You are not going anywhere you don't want to, I promise." Bella's assurance to Lizzie calmed me somewhat, but I still couldn't shake the bad feeling away.

"Jacob, I know you are only trying to look after me but this doesn't concern you. This is between Edward and me, Elizabeth is his daughter too."

"Sure, what a great father he is… leaving you like that."

My body tensed as some pieces started to fall in together. Bella's distance, her avoiding my gaze… the clipped words and tone. I knew something big was about to crash on me, but I kept pushing it away. I had this dreading feeling at the pit of my stomach. My gut instinct told me to run and hide.

I ignored the rest of Jacob's thoughts and turned to Bella.

"What is he talking about?"

"We need to talk."

I've never been more scared in my life.

It was decided that we all would go back to the house, so Bella and I could talk without worrying about curious humans' eyes, but of course they all would go on a short hunting trip for a few hours so Bella and I could have privacy. Lizzie remembered her backpack backstage, so we went to pick that up before piling up in cars.

Now, that was an awkward situation.

Jacob decided to run, -by Seth's thoughts while he was back in La Push he knew were we lived- not wanting to be in a car for any length of time with a bunch of vampires. Lizzie wouldn't let go of Bella, and I couldn't let go of any of them so Seth, Bella, Lizzie, Jasper and I ended in my Volvo. Jasper came along for obvious reasons, the tension between Bella and me had been so intense while we walked to the parking lot we didn't want Lizzie to notice and worry so he came to keep her and us calm. Seth just couldn't be away from Lizzie after all these weeks of separation and it would be a nice distraction so she wouldn't see my worried face.

Things were starting to make more sense now, especially when Seth told me his side of the story since he arrived to La Push through his mind during the two hour drive from Calgary to Sundre then the half hour drive home.

As I suspected it when she recoiled from my touch, she wasn't here for me, she was here just for Lizzie… she hated me.

And it hurt, so much.

But I deserved it, I was a fool for even entertain the idea that she might have forgiven me. But I had been so, so… happy? Excited? I can't even come up with a word to describe how I felt when I saw her in front of me, breathing and alive, so I just threw caution away and let my mind go wild, thinking about possibilities, for the tree of us. I mean, she was back… I thought that maybe, she had listened to me that day I called her and took my offer, of us becoming a family… I thought… I thought she believed my words.

But I was wrong.

When Seth went to La Push, he immediately went to look for Jacob and Leah. But as Emily told him when he called they had been gone for a while so Seth went to look for them to Seattle. He thought Jacob was still suffering for the loss of his sister so he wanted to be there for him. He went to Kaya's house, figuring they'd be there and what he got was the shock of his life.

All this time, that's where Bella had been. At Emily's sister's house. The same house Seth had offered when we had planned to go to Seattle looking for Bella more than a year ago. I wondered briefly what would have happened if Victoria hadn't messed with our plans and we had showed up unannounced at Kaya's house.

Anyway, no one had known about Bella being at Kaya's but Emily who put Bella in contact with her sister when she wanted to escape and hide. Jacob and Leah only found out about it when the hospital called the very same day Rebecca died in a car accident to tell them about finally finding a donor for Bella, and asking for permission for the surgery. The very same call I must have received but was stupid enough not to answer and misinterpreted. Now that I replay the nurse's voice in my head, she never said Bella died, she just said she was calling regarding Bella and to call back. Then I remember Paul's words, he too hadn't mentioned Bella's name.

I had been so stupid, overreacting and not thinking as always.

In the end, Jacob and Billy had gone to pick up Rebecca's body while Leah went to be there for Bella and take care of her at the hospital, which explains why Bella disappeared from Alice's vision since Leah is a wolf. Then Jacob and Leah took turns taking care of her with the help of Kaya for the past year. Since Forks never heard of Bella again, they all assumed she had died, same for everyone at the reservation but Emily of course. Bella wanted her privacy, and she didn't want word to go out in case something went wrong and she ended up dying anyway. The odds of her surviving even after the transplant were close to none, everything could go wrong, from her body rejecting the transplant to her getting an infection. Most people don't make it half a year, so Bella asked Jacob and Leah to not tell anyone, not wanting us to found out and then disappointing Lizzie and making her suffer all over again in case things turned for the worse.

But that didn't happen, Bella started to respond to the treatment, she stayed at the hospital in observation for a few months and making sure she didn't caught any infections and nurturing her through an IV until she was able to eat normal food. When she got out, she still needed a lot of care and constant check-ups. She was weak and vulnerable so she stayed with Kaya again and Leah and Jacob moved in. Jacob was using Bella's recovery to get his mind off of losing his sister, focusing solely on Bella -and his promise to Charlie- to deal better with the pain and Leah being Jacob's mate supported him in everything.

And then, Bella made it. A year passed and she was cleared, the transplant had been a success, she still has to be monitored but now she was able to travel again and return to her normal life. The doctor gave her the news just last week, so that's why she is here now. Seth told Bella about Lizzie's play and she wanted to surprise her.

Seth also told me about the conversation he and Bella had had when he found out she was alive. He was mostly in shock, and angry because he knew all Lizzie had suffered because of her absence but as soon as Bella explained he understood. He didn't want Lizzie to suffer a letdown again in case things didn't work out either.

Then, it was Bella's turn to ask questions.

She only asked about Lizzie, if she was well, happy and safe. So Seth told her everything, the truth. Everything from Victoria's attack and me saving both of them to our trip around the world to get Lizzie away from the pain. Bella didn't ask questions about me, but Seth was sure to tell her anyway, until Bella asked him to stop. That she didn't want to know anything about me unless it concerned our daughter.

So every time Seth would mention me, Bella would change the subject or ignore him. Seeing his memories, seeing Bella snap at him and glare cut me deep. Like a million tiny razors slowly cutting their way into my chest and reaching my heart.

"I'm sorry Edward… I tried, but… she wouldn't listen. I don't think she hates you, I think she is just still hurt."

"It's Ok, Seth." I whispered so low so only him and Jasper… and probably Lizzie would hear.

The only noise the whole ride home,was Lizzie's voice contently telling her mother about her life with me and asking questions, of course.

"Mommy, you should see the BIG animals daddy gets me! He is so strong! And he plays for me every day, he plays me your song! I didn't know it was your song, the one you used to sing to me? Remember? Why didn't you tell me daddy wrote it for you?"

I looked at Bella's face through the rearview mirror just in time to see her look away.

"It slipped my mind, honey."

"Oh, well it's very beautiful. He also let me keep your CD, he says he gave it to you on your birthday, it's so pretty! You wanna hear it when we get home? It has nana's favorite song in it too."

"Why don't you tell me about school? Seth told me you just started? That must be so exciting!" Bella changed the subject and Elizabeth beamed at her.

"Yes! Daddy told me it was Ok, he teaches me how to act around humans, I like humans they are interesting."

"I like to hear that." Bella smiled warmly at her and took her hand to placed it on her cheek "show me your first day of school, what was it like?" She asked with tears filling her warm chocolate eyes.

The rest of the ride was silent, I couldn't tell what Lizzie was showing Bella but I guessed it was good since Bella kept smiling and crying as she held our daughter in her lap. At some point her eyes flickered to mine but she immediately averted them, and I frowned. I hated this, I hated the way she pushed me away.

I needed to talk to her as soon as possible, so I could clear things with her. I'm not stupid I don't expect her to forgive me but I want her to listen to me so she can finally hear the truth about that day in the forest. So maybe she can give me another chance, and work things out between us. I want it all with her, I love her so much it is madness. I want the three of us to get our own place, be a family and most of all… be happy, after all this pain the only two woman in my life deserved to be happy. I would spend the rest of my existence making it up for them, taking care of them, loving them and giving them anything they wanted.

Ten minutes later, we parked on the driveway to our house in the middle of nowhere. Of course this didn't surprise Bella, she was used to this. We all left the car, and I wasn't surprised when only Carlisle's car with him, Esme and Alice parked behind us. The rest had gone hunting, knowing we needed privacy and not wanting to be in the way.

"Momma! Come! Let me show you my room! It's so cool, auntie Ali did it for me. You can sleep with me until daddy gets a bed for your room!" Bella tripped with her own feet at that and I caught her before her knees touched the ground.

"You Ok?" I asked her.

This old trait of her, her clumsiness… dear god, it did something to me. God, I missed her. Her cheeks flushed, venom flowed around my mouth but I ignored the burn it my throat. It surprised me how easy it was for me to do that, when years ago it had been damn near impossible to not sink my teeth down her throat.

"Yes." She breathed before standing right and stepping away from me.

Lizzie stared at us curiously, and I wondered if she had finally caught with our situation. Then she took us both by our hands and pulled us inside.

"Daddy, you know mommy sleeps you have to get her a bed in your room. She can't sleep in the couch."

"Lizzie, that won't be necessary." Bella told her as we entered the house. Seth, Carlisle and Esme following. Alice and Jasper climbed the side of the house and entered their bedroom through a window. Alice was trying so hard to look into the future, she needed to concentrate. She was sure the static was because of everything being so up in the air now and because of Seth and Lizzie. She was trying to see around them but she could only get glimpses, nothing she could work on.

"Oh, well you can sleep with me always then. I don't mind, the three of us can fit I'm sure."

I closed my eyes and looked away.

"Edward, breathe…" Jasper said from upstairs.

I needed to talk to Bella now, I needed to know what was going to happen now. I'm not stupid, I know nothing is going to be like a fairytale so easily and I didn't want Lizzie to keep up with this. It would only hurt her more in the end if Bella didn't believe me.

"Lizzie…" Bella started but then shut at the loss of words, we shared a look and for the first time she held my eyes for more than three seconds.

The pain in her eyes told me everything I needed to know, whatever was going through her mind wasn't good and she knew it would end up hurting our daughter.

But I wasn't going to let that happen.

She was back, for some reason she was back and I wasn't going to make the same mistakes that brought so much pain in our lives. I wasn't going to let her go, not ever again. I was going to convince her, I was going to fight for her like I should have done all those years ago.

She had to see, she had to know… maybe Seth wasn't able to make her listen but I will. I'll fight for my family, I won't lose them again without a fight. I'm probably being selfish, Bella deserves better than me but I don't care anymore. I'm done with hurting the two people I love the most, I'm done with the damn pain in their eyes.

Bella's here, as impossible as that might be she is here and this was the second chance I had prayed for so long ago. I'm not going to waste it by being a martyr and being noble as I had done in the past when I left her.

The greatest mistake I'll ever make.

"Elizabeth, why doesn't nana take you to your room to take you out of your costume and give you a bath while your mother and I talk for a bit."

"No, I want momma to do it!" She went to hug her waist again. "Don't leave me momma, please!" Lizzie instantly started crying again and Bella and I kneeled in front of her at the same time, shocking both of us but we recovered quickly.

"Lizzie, listen to me. I'm not going anywhere Ok?" she caressed her cheek "I swear honey."

"How about this," I interrupted, not standing Lizzie's cries and pain "You go with mommy and you show her your room. She'll help you get ready for the evening while I make your dinner, and then while you eat your mother and I will talk on the porch where you can see us. Will that work for you?"

Lizzie could only nod as she clung to Bella's neck.

I listened to them as Lizzie guided Bella through the house to her room I wanted to follow them but decided to give them time alone. I knew how much Lizzie had missed her she had known nothing but Bella her entire life until she came to live with me. She had been used to be with her 24/7 their separation had affected Elizabeth harshly.

"Daddy gave me this doll on my first birthday with him, Auntie Ali and I always play with her, she has made a lot of little outfits for her to match mines."

"That was so nice of her. What else do you do with them?"

"I like to play with Uncle Jazzy and Emmy, they are too funny. Jazzy is always on my team, he is very smart he helps me to beat uncle Emmy."

"That must be fun," Bella chuckled "I bet they fight a lot over it."

"They do! They are so funny mommy, and they missed you too almost as much as daddy and me."

"Let's get you ready for your bath."

I remember Bella liking pasta, so I decided on spaghetti. Then I remembered she must still be in recovery so she needed to eat healthy and I decided to make a salad as well. Esme helped me quietly next to me, she too was worried about Bella's health and made a few other things that might be beneficial to her. She had already prepared a guest room for Bella, figuring she'd stay with us. I hoped she was right.

When Bella was done bathing Lizzie I heard the both of them coming down the stairs but instead of coming into the kitchen, Lizzie stirred Bella towards the living room. Even if I couldn't hear Lizzie's thought, I knew her intentions. So I quietly followed them without being noticed.

"Look momma, I helped daddy decorate his piano. It's green! He let me paint it green, and he helped me… like you with our treasure's box!"

Through the windows reflection, I saw Bella's face go from shock, to incredulity to pure pain as she stared at the lid of my piano. Lizzie kept talking about how I had been teaching her to play it without noticing Bella's tears.

"Elizabeth, nana is waiting for you in the kitchen."

Lizzie looked unsure between the kitchen and Bella until she smiled at her encouragingly. Lizzie stood on the piano's stool and hugged Bella fiercely.

"I love you momma."

"I love you more honey, we'll just be outside. I promise I'm not going anywhere without you."

With that Lizzie nodded and jumped down the bench, she rushed to me and I caught her in my arms hugging her to me too. Bella's scent lingered on her so I breathed her in, like an addict in need of his drug.

I dropped Lizzie to the floor and I saw Seth who had been outside with Jacob waiting for her at the entrance of the kitchen. I was so glad he was here for her he gave me a nod and carried Lizzie away.

"Good luck."

When I turned around, Bella's back was still to me. Knowing her I knew she was trying to hide from me. God, I wanted to hold her so much, I wanted to feel her warm body against my cold one, I needed to be surrounded by her scent, I needed to hear her voice, her laugh. I needed my angel, I needed to hear her tell me I still had hope, that I still had a chance with her.

I missed her so much, all this time I never stopped thinking about her. She was there every time I closed my eyes, every time I saw our daughter's eyes. She was always in my thoughts, when I looked at sky, when I watched the sunset at Isle Esme, when I waited for dawn at any country we were at the moment. She never stopped being out of my life.

She was staring at the collage of pictures on the lid of my piano, her fingers tracing the edges and faces. I stood to her side and watched her as she examined Lizzie's and I piece of art with wonder on her face. Tears were falling down her cheeks and made small pools over the flat surface.

"I always knew you'd be a great father," she whispered "thank you."

I swallowed.

"She makes things so easy, I love her."

"I know I see it in your eyes." She finally looked at me.

"Bella…" Great, I had wished for this moment for years and now I that I had it I forgot the great speech I had come up with.

"What?"

…

…

…

"I missed you."

She looked away with a sardonic smile.

"Well, that's… that's hard to believe." She looked back at me as she harshly wiped her face clean and I pulled at my hair. How do I make her understand?

"Bella," I tried again but she interrupted me.

"Let's take this outside."

I nodded and motion her to lead the way.

Even though it was spring, it was chilly outside. I looked down at Bella and noticed she was only wearing a thin sweater. Without a word, I shrugged off of my jacket and placed it around her shoulders. She rolled her eyes but didn't fight me off instead she wrapped it tightly around her tiny frame. Then it occurred to me how stupid this idea was, she shouldn't be outside, she had just been cleared what if she gets sick?

"Maybe we should go back inside," I started to say as we reached the edge of the back yard and entered the woods.

The house was still in our view and we could see Lizzie on the kitchen bar as she and Seth had their dinner and Esme and Carlisle stood nearby watching them.

"No, I'm fine." She stopped walking, and turned to me. "Can she hear us now?"

I turned to see Lizzie and called her, but only Esme, Carlisle and Jacob heard me but acted as if they had not.

"You are Ok." Carlisle assured me and I nodded.

"You are safe." I told her and she nodded.

It was awkward, none of us said anything at first and the silence was killing me. This wasn't supposed to be us? We used to be way more than this, how could I have messed things so badly.

"Bella, before we… talk about, whatever happens now. There's something you need to know."

"I know of Victoria, Seth told me-"

"No, that's not it… I wanted to apologize."

"Save it, I'm ok… you didn't know I'd end up pregnant."

"No, please, listen to me…" I pleaded "Bella… it's more than that. I'm sorry, for everything. That day in the forest, I-"

"We don't have to talk about that day, I'm not here looking for an apology. I only came back because of our daughter."

"I know Bella, but we do need to talk about us first."

"Us?" He face immediately change, she was angry now "Please don't make me laugh Edward, there's no us, you made that pretty clear when you left." She said with venom.

Her words stung, but I wasn't backing down.

"It was a mistake!" I hurried to say, please believe me angel "I never wanted to leave you, I thought I was doing what was best for you, what happed with Jasper… it scared me Bella. I thought I was going to lose you permanently if we continued… especially after that night." I said desperately, she needed to believe me, I'd grovel if I had to. "But I never wanted to leave, ever… I swear, I love you Bella, I never stopped loving you. You are the only thing I've been thinking about since that day."

I took a step towards her, trying to take her hands in mine. I needed to touch her, I needed to feel her close to me.

"You can go to hell, Edward." She took a step back "I'm not an idiotic little girl anymore. I'm not stupid! You treated me like trash! After all I did for you, after all I gave you. I was yours and you didn't care!" She cried with angry tears, raw pain lacing her voice. "I'm worth more than that! I'm not something you can just toss aside when you are done with it!"

"I never thought you were! Bella, that night was the best night of my existence! I swear! I just panicked, I thought you'd hate me later… when I saw the bruises I hated myself, I couldn't believe I'd hurt you like that. I thought you deserved better than me."

"Of course I deserve better than you, I know that now," she said angrily "That's exactly what I finally realized! I spent almost six months in a hospital and you know what I came up with?"

I could only stare at her with my mouth hanging open.

"I've been so stupid," She laughed, but none of these was funny "I loved you, god… did I love you. I thought you were perfect, with your perfect smile, your perfect hair, your perfect face." She started pacing around, as if she was talking to herself, and I couldn't believe the woman standing in front of me. "Edward could do no wrong, he was good at everything… he was even a better actor." She finally stopped to glare at me once again.

"Bella, please listen to me… I-"

"All this time at the hospital, by myself, made me realize all the things I did wrong, and you know what I did wrong?"

I looked down, I couldn't meet her eyes.

"I loved you more than myself," her voice shook with emotion "I had you on this pedestal, I thought you were a god, perfect and could do no wrong. But boy how wrong I was. You are the most imperfect, broken soul I'll ever meet. You are so broken inside you don't know what you want."

"Bella, I'm sorry… I really am." I told her, meeting her angry stare and pained eyes. "If you could only let me explain."

"Every night, you told me you had been so alone for years… and I was there for you," she started with her voice barely above a whisper "when you were scared, I was there for you… when you doubted yourself I was there for you! I never walked away! I thought, if I was yours entirely then you'll finally realized that I really wanted to be with you forever… you already had my heart so I gave you everything left of me… and you left… that same morning! What more did you want from me?!" She started sobbing.

"I know I was just a human, I know I could barely keep up with your life style… but I was willing to try, I was willing to leave everything in my life behind for you and you just… you had to be so cruel about it? Couldn't you just tell me I wasn't enough? You had to let things go for so long? Or was that part of your sick game?"

It was as if suddenly I needed air. How could I even think she'll give me a chance… I was a monster.

"Bella, I know I have no real excuses… but please let me explain."

I stood in front of her and cradled her face in my hands backing her against a tree, not letting her escape, she needed to hear me out

"It wasn't game, I really loved you, and I still love you more than anything!"

"I don't believe you!" She tried to push me away but I didn't let her.

"Angel, don't you remember anything I told you before?"

"I remember everything that you told me. Including the words that had negated all the rest."

God, what did I do?

"Bella, I can't live in a world where you don't exist. I'm a good liar Bella, I had to be. I'm a good liar, but still, for you to believe me so quickly." I winced "That was… excruciating."

She waited, her furious eyes still drilling into mine and again I wished I could just read her mind already!

I won't give up. I couldn't lose her, she needed to see.

"You have to know what you mean to me, Bella. Before you, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark, but there were stars points of light and reason… And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. Nothi-"

"Oh, stop that poetic crap, it worked once not anymore." She snapped, and the hate on her eyes left me breathless for a second.

"It's not crap, you have to understand! When we were in the forest, when I was telling you goodbye, you weren't going to let go especially after that night. I could see that, I didn't want to do it. It felt like it would kill me to do it but I knew that if I didn't convince you that I didn't love you anymore, it would just take you that much longer to get on with your life. I hoped that, if you thought I'd moved on so would you."

"That's pretty arrogant from you, and you are not like that. I know you, so quit it. Stop lying, it doesn't matter anyway now."

"Of course it does! Why won't you believe me! Or more importantly, how could you believe me then?!" I was angry now too "After all the thousand times I've told you I love you? How could you let five words break your faith in me?!"

I don't want you anymore.

Five words I'll regret for the rest of my existence.

"Because it never made sense for you to love me!" She finally pushed me away.

I shook my head in disbelief.

"That's the most absurd, ridiculous concept…" I laughed without humor "as if there was any way that I could exist without needing you !"

"Well you did perfectly fine to me. You went out on a nice long vacation around the world if I'm not mistaken."

"That was for Lizzie's benefit! Bella, you don't know what a hell I've been living without you and god… when I learned about your sickness… and Lizzie, god you don't know how thankful I am for her. It was Lizzie, our beautiful daughter it was her who finally made me wake up. I finally realized I should have never left I shouldn't have taken that decision for us, that's why I looked for you, so hard. I was going crazy without you."

She turned around and walked to sit on a fallen tree. I saw her shoulders shake as she hid her face in her hands crying. I walked and kneeled in front of her, pulling her hand s away from her face and making her look at me.

"It hurt me so much to learn what you went through… when I thought you were dead, dear god." I brushed her tears away with my thumbs "I still feel sick, sick to my core, even now when I can see and feel you in my arms for what I did, for leaving you alone through that." It was so hard to keep my voice from shaking "When I saw you close your eyes through Alice's vision… it nearly killed me not being there for you."

Her eyes were red with tears I threaded my fingers through her short strands of hair and kissed her eyes. She tried to fight me off but of course I was stronger.

"But… angel, I'm so, so sorry… I shouldn't have left I know that now I was just so afraid of losing you forever if I did something stupid! Please, you have to believe me. I mean… when I saw all the physical pain you were in that morning… I wanted to kill myself so badly for hurting you like that."

"So you left? You were afraid of losing me and you left?! That's the most idiotic thing I've ever heard."

She laughed again and stood up walking away from me only to whirl around when she was a few feet away.

"You know what it is to really be afraid of something? Huh? Being alone at your father's funeral, with your body acting all weird and to only have Mike fucking Newton there to console you! Now THAT is something to be scared of!"

Anger boiled inside my body at the thought of another man having his arms around her, but I know I didn't have a claim on her so I couldn't act on it.

"I know! And you have no idea how sorry I am! I'm sorry for what happened to Charlie, I'm sorry for not being there to protect you both and above all… I'm sorry for not being there when Lizzie was born. I'm sorry," I was hyperventilating now, who knew vampires could do that "I'm sorry I wasn't there through your sickness, I really am… Bella please, you have to believe me. This past year has been pure hell without you!"

"You wanna talk about hell?! What about my own hell! You don't know what a hell I went through!" Her anger only fueled my own.

"The hell I know! Show me your wrists!"

Her entire body froze.

No one but Alice and I knew the specifics of her vision, so I knew Seth couldn't have told her that we knew about her giving up.

"That's none of you business." She gritted her teeth and hid her hands behind her back.

"You are the mother of my daughter and the woman I love. Of course it is."

She looked down ashamed of herself.

"There wasn't any hope left, I knew Lizzie was safe with you and I was in pain."

"You still had three weeks left. Damn, if you had gone through it just one minute before… you wouldn't be here."

"That's not true I didn't get to cut too deep. I fainted with the smell of blood."

That caught me off guard.

So that's what Alice and I saw, she was just fainting not dying. But of course, when Alice didn't see her again what were we supposed to think?

"Still, you gave up."

She started crying again and covered her face with her hands. I could hold it any longer and I wrapped my arms tightly around her. She stiffened, but didn't try to push me away.

"Bella," I kissed her head "I'm so sorry, I swear to god… I love you."

She shook her head in my chest, not daring to look up and I looked up at the darkening sky, asking for help.

"Don't ever say that again, please." She whispered, finally stepping away from me.

"You don't believe me, do you?" I whispered, feeling exhausted and defeated. "Why can you believe the lie, but not the truth?"

"It never made sense for you to love me… I always knew that."

…

…

…

"I'll prove it to you."

She looked up again curiously as I stepped closer to her gathering her in my arms. I cradled her face between my hands and rested my forehead on hers. Our noses touching and our lips just a breath away from each other.

"Please don't."

"Why not?" I sniffed with my eyes closed, my jaw tight with the restrain. A war between lust and thirst broke within me, but my love for her conquered.

"Because I don't want you to."

She took a step back from me, and even thought we were still inches away from each other, I've never felt so far away from her.

"I know you hate me, and I don't blame you. I hate myself too for what I did to you too. But I have to know… Am I too late? Did I hurt you too much? Just, tell me now whether or not you can still love me, in your letter… you did say you loved me, that you'll never stop loving me… is it true? Can you?"

Slowly, Bella took another step backwards, shrugging off of my jacket and giving it to me. I took it in an automatic movement, my eyes never leaving her face.

"I didn't come back for you Edward, I'm only here for Elizabeth."

"Just answer the question, please." I said with my heart in my throat "Can you still love me or not?"

…

…

…

"You have hurt me too much…"

"Bella…" I pleaded.

…

…

…

"No, I don't love you anymore."

Damn, I think it's clear Bella is not an innocent little girl anymore, she has kind of grown a backbone!

What do you guys think? Was she to hard on him? what should Edward do now? Should he give up or grovel at Bella's feet until she takes pity on him? LOL I know some of you wouldn't mind that... right, Ffaddward?

Who recognized New Moon's lines? Let me know!

Next chapter will be up soon!

Saludos!

Tammy!