Hi! You missed me?
You have no idea how sorry I am for the two months delay but I was sick and hospitalized, too much stress according to the doctor. I had an anxiety attack so I had to take a break which translated on my mom taking my laptop away for the reminder of summer break. So between that, getting back to school and my work I HAD to take a break. BUT I'M BACK! And good news is I had next chapter half way done so I hope to be back on schedule from now on.
Again, sorry for the wait I hope you haven't abandoned me and this story.
So, I'm not entirely happy with this chapter... but meh, at least we are finally on our way to our HEA although we will sill have a few step backs. I'm not me without drama but I promise some much awaited fluff by chapter 26!
SM owns everything.
Chapter 24: Never Stop
"Never Stop" (Acoustic Version) – Safetysuit
This is my love song to you
Let every woman know I'm yours
So you can fall asleep each night, babe
And know I'm dreaming of you more
You're always hoping that we make it
You always wanna keep my gaze
Well, you're the only one I see
And that's the one thing that won't change
I will never stop tryin'
I will never stop watchin' as you leave
I will never stop losing my breath
Every time I see you lookin' back at me
And I will never stop holding your hand
I will never stop opening your door
I will never stop choosin' you, babe
I will never get used to you
And with this love song to you
It's not a momentary phase
You are my life, I don't deserve you
But you love me just the same
And as the mirror says we're older
I will not look the other way
You are my life, my love, my only
And that's the one thing that won't change
You still get my heart racing, for you
You still get my heart racing for you
While Alice kept asking Bella for opinions on what her new room should be like, Carlisle started questioning me about my back. When I had used my shirt to stop the bleeding in Bella's wound he had noticed that my back was healed and the scar almost invisible even for vampire eyes. He was awestruck when I told him about Lizzie's tears and as I predicted he immediately took a sample of Lizzie's venom and was now in his study inspecting it along with a sample of my venom and Seth's saliva.
Later that day, after making sure Bella and Lizzie would be ok alone for a while I asked Emmett to help me bring back Bella and Lizzie's stuff from the cottage and clean the area from all the debris and chunks of wood and concrete that were spattered around. Meanwhile Alice decided to drive to Calgary to buy everything she needed for Bella's room before it got too late.
After this morning's events, thankfully the day passed smoothly afterwards. I spend most of the late afternoon on my piano with my daughter in my lap listening to whatever she asked me to play for her and I noticed Bella watching us from the living room where she laid on the couch. Not paying attention to the documentary Jasper was watching. Her pensive looks made me wonder what she was thinking several times.
It was past ten when Alice came back with everything, Esme was the most excited one at having the opportunity to re-do a room but most of all at having Bella living with us, at least for two weeks.
"I put the last of your things in the basement, I'll bring them up to your room as soon as Alice is done with it." I say coming into the living room where Bella is settling herself for the night.
"Thank you." She let herself fall on the couch and carefully laid her crutches on the floor next to her.
"Emmett couldn't fix your laptop, but you can use mine if you need it while your new one arrives." I added.
"That won't be necessary but thanks." She snuggled into the couch, wrapping a blanket around her.
"Are you sure you'll be alright here? There are tons of beds upstairs for you to use. Alice will have everyone up in my room all night anyways so it should be fine."
"I prefer the couch here downstairs, less noise." She explained.
Well I couldn't argue with that, my room was being transformed right now so that meant drills and hammers making noise all night. That's why Lizzie was now sleeping in Esme and Carlisle's room on the second floor since her room was next to mine, but I bet it won't be long before she crawls back here and lays with her mom. She still doesn't like to sleep alone.
"Alright, call me if you need anything… I'll be upstairs." I say, not wanting to leave her alone but at the same time not wanting to be in the way. I had two weeks to convince her to move in permanently with us and I didn't want to screw it up.
"Uhm, Edward?" She called as I reached the second floor.
"Yeah?" I was back on the living room a second later.
"Does Carlisle have some Advil, by any chance?"
"Medical kit." Carlisle thought having heard us from my room where he was painting the walls with Jasper.
"Does anything hurt?" I asked worriedly, looking through Carlisle's medical kit on the coffee table that I had used earlier in the day to clean her cuts.
"I have a headache… Maybe I did hit my head after all." She said sitting up on the couch.
"Are you dizzy?" She shook her head and I kneeled before her handing her the pills and the tea Esme had made her earlier.
"What about nausea?" I asked frowning.
"I'm fine." She said after swallowing "It's been a long day… I'm just tired, that must be it."
I used the little flashlight on Carlisle's pen and pointed it directly at her eyes.
"Look here…" I held up a finger, both her pupils dilated so it wasn't anything serious so far. "Now here…" I moved my finger to the right "Does the light hurt?"
"No, I told you I'm fine." She said patiently but I could hear a bit of annoyance in her tone.
"My apologies…" I said feeling chastised but didn't relent, her safety and wellbeing was more important "Can, can I try… just one more thing? Please? Just to be sure?"
She took a calming breath.
"Ok."
"Tell me if it hurts…"
Gently, I probed my fingers around her skull. When she didn't complain after a minute I stopped.
"It doesn't seem to be serious… just a headache." I whispered looking down, feeling now like an idiot. She had told me she was fine, but I had to go all mother hen on her again.
…
…
"I'm sorry…" She breathed after a few seconds "It's ok, I know you can't help it."
I looked up a little surprised by the softening of her voice, and I saw a ghost of a smile on her lips.
I nodded with a tightlipped smile.
"I'm really trying Bella… to give you your space, but I can't help but worry."
"I know… I'm also trying here… I, I want to understand you."
…
…
I took her hand that was lying on her lap.
"I'm sorry I'm so… obsessive and worried all the time… I really want to be what you want and need but old habits die hard. I just want to make sure you are ok I don't want anything happening to you… I wouldn't survive it this time around."
She was quiet for a minute, thinking over my words. When she finally spoke again, her voice was quiet.
"I understand Edward… but you also have to understand that I'm not a damsel in distress… I can do things on my own, I don't need you or Alice or Esme to take me by the hand everywhere… just because I'm human that doesn't mean I'm useless."
"I don't think you are useless Bella… it's just," I was having a difficult time expressing myself "have you ever had something so precious, so worthy you are afraid of breaking it? That you wouldn't even take it out of its box?"
She nodded but said nothing.
"Well, that's what you are to me… you are everything to me, so precious… I want to keep every harm away from you."
She took a deep breath, as if thinking in how to say her next words.
"But, Edward… I'm not something for you to keep safe. I have a say in my own life… I'm not an object, I'm your equal no matter if you are stronger and more durable than me we are both our own persons. I don't want you to baby me, what I want is for you to treat me as one of your own."
"You don't get it," I shook my head "Bella, I do respect you as your own person. I do see you as a strong independent woman. Taking care of you doesn't change that, I want to take care of you not because I don't think you can but because I want to."
When she didn't say anything I continued.
"It's like when you feed Lizzie, even if she doesn't need food… you do it because you care. Because you have that need to make sure she is ok. I don't want to be patronizing or domineering… I'm sorry I may look like that but that's not my intention as you may think." I say slowly, letting my words sink in.
"It's not because I think you being human makes you weak," I continued explaining "I've seen multiple times how strong you are, stronger than I am."
I turned her hand around and passed my thumb over the scars on her wrist. Where she had cut herself when she gave up in Kaya's bathroom back in Seattle.
"I take care of you because I like it, because it makes me feel like I'm finally doing something for you… as if somehow I finally have a chance at deserving you." I bring her wrist to my mouth and brush my lips over her scars.
"I take care of you because you matter to me more than anything else in the world besides Lizzie. I've seen Alice's visions and it killed me see you go alone through that hell when you needed someone beside you to tell you it was going to be ok, to give you courage, to give you love."
She pulled her hand away and covered her wrist with her sleeve, hiding her face from me. I pulled her hand back, not wanting her to hide herself from me and kissed her wrist again, breathing her in this time. Tears started falling down her cheeks while my throat was set on fire.
"I'm a hypocrite…" She sniffed "here I'm telling you I'm strong enough but this" she brushed her thumb over her scars "says the contrary… I hate them, I wish I could erase them."
I shook my head.
"I don't think you were weak… you want to know what I think?"
She nodded slowly.
"I think you were in too much pain for you to handle on your own."
She snorted.
"That's the same thing."
"No, there's only so much pain someone can handle alone… and I don't blame you for wanting it to go away… I don't think less of you for this."
"Why?"
"Bella, you did go through hell I don't think any of us would bear it for as long a you did. Nobody here thinks less of you for this, we all have our long list of sins… think of Esme for example, she threw herself of a cliff because she lost her baby… and before Alice found Jasper he had tried to end his life multiple times too, he hated the way he lived before us and Rosalie was letting herself bleed to death, without screaming for help before Carlisle found her too."
She gasped she didn't exactly know what happened to Rosalie. Just that it was something similar to what almost happened to her in Port Angeles.
"I'm not saying what you did was right, because it wasn't the solution but I understand why you would go that way, so I'm not judging you, no one here judges you. We empathize with you, we feel your pain because some of us have had it just as hard as you and we want to help you overcome this."
She started crying again and I sat by her holding her as she cried on my shirt.
"Aside from Alice we all saw our family die or suffer our deaths, we had to leave them behind, some of us have been alone for years too thinking of what ifs and regretting so many decision from our human lives… Esme still regrets not being there for her father's funeral and Rosalie hurts for the life she wishes she could have had but was taken away from. Emmett had to leave his sister and nephew behind and it killed him not being able to protect them anymore."
"Why are you telling me all this?" She whispered through her cries.
"So you finally understand it's not pity, charity, arrogance or superiority why we are trying to help you. In some way we have all been were you are, we've been as hurt and as angry as you with the world because of the mistakes of others and we are just trying to help you make things better, because we love you and we hate to see you like this. To go through what we went through."
"I never thought about that… about the others' pasts, I'm so sorry."
I kissed her temple, then her ear before whispering.
"But, unlike them… we can make things right again, some of it."
She looked back at me with curious eyes.
"What do you mean?"
I brushed my thumb under her right eye, drying her tears.
"I was serious earlier… before we were interrupted by Irina. I'm willing to do anything you want for a last chance."
"Why?"
"I've told you why…" I placed a lock of hair behind her ear "a thousand times but you don't believe me…" It was her turn to look down.
"Edward, it's more than that… I'm so confused, I don't know what to believe anymore."
"Then what's stopping you from giving me a chance?"
"I can't trust you with my heart again... you hurt me too much."
I swallowed hard and took a breath to undo the knot in my throat.
"Bella, I'm out of ideas… what do I have to do to win your trust back?"
"I've told you…" She said staring at me with a meaningful look I couldn't decipher "give something only you can give me."
"But you hate presents." I said confused.
"I do, but there's only one thing from you that I'd accept… but only if you really want to give it to me."
"Daddy!" Lizzie jumped on my lap "Can we go for a run? I'm sooooooo boooored!" She said dramatically.
I stopped writing on my journal and looked up.
"A run?"
"Yes, please? Please, please, please pretty please?"
Damn it, there's the look. I damn the day Alice taught her that trick.
I looked at Bella who just finished her breakfast, it's been three days since Irina crushed the cottage, her foot is better but… I don't know.
"We have to wait until someone comes home, I can't leave your momma alone."
"But Nana is here, and Seth."
"Yes, but Nana is busy coming and going from the cottage, and Seth is a kid just like you."
At that Seth grumbled and Lizzie jumped from my lap dancing in her mother's direction.
"Momma, you wanna come with us?"
Bella looked up form the sink where she was washing the dishes.
"Sure honey, just let me go change."
"But Bella, your foot." I pointed worriedly.
"It's ok," she rolled her ankle "good as new. I need some fresh air too." She smiled shyly looking at me.
I smiled back, and I could feel my heart wanting to beat again.
"We'll wait for you outside then."
Five minutes later, Bella walked out through the kitchen back door wearing an old pair of jeans, t-shirt and hoodie. It made me think of our high school days, she hadn't changed much and that gave me hope. My Bella was still there somewhere.
"Ready to go?" I asked.
"Yeah, were are we going?"
We started walking out of the back lawn in direction of the forest.
"I usually take her to a lake deep in the woods where there are no hunters nearby. We can walk there for you, it's not that far or I can carry you if you prefer."
"How far?"
"About an hour and a half."
She nodded.
"I'll walk, I need to stretch my legs too. If I get tired I'll tell you and we can rest."
"Good." I smiled at her before looking up to watch Elizabeth. She and Seth were a few feet before us. Lizzie was holding his hand communicating with him in her own special way, showing him images of what she wanted to do today.
About forty minutes into our hike, Bella broke the peaceful silence.
"When do you think she can go back to school? I hate to see her so restless." She motioned to Lizzie who was playing catch with Seth running in circles around us.
I thought for a moment, watching our daughter trying to climb a tree but of course she fell. She didn't have vampire strength and Seth caught her midair before she could hurt herself.
"Are you Ok?" I asked her in concern.
Her skin was as hard as mine so she couldn't scratch herself but I still worried.
"I'm fine daddy!" She answered and took off again, with Seth chasing her.
"I don't know, I guess until we hear about Irina again." I answered Bella's previous question.
"You really think she would harm her?"
I shrugged.
"I don't think so, she loves Lizzie but I'm not taking any chances. Laurent wasn't her real mate, so I don't think she'll go that far. She just needs time to realize this, hopefully before she does anything stupid."
"How strong is a mate's bond?" She asked curiously.
"It's a really powerful thing… in our world, you don't kill anyone's mate unless you have a death wish. You know how we don't change, right?"
She nodded.
"Well, feelings are the same… it's really hard for something within us to change. So when we do there's no way back," I said slowly, letting her absorb my words "if we fall in love its forever… with humans, time can heal almost anything there's no such thing with vampires. It's like engraving something in stone, it's permanent."
"And… how strong are those feelings?" She was playing with the end of her scarf, not meeting my eyes but her brows were knit together, telling me her mind was working on something.
"As I said it's a powerful thing, just as our abilities as humans grow during the change so does our feeling capabilities." I looked at her through my periphery "We feel with so much passion and force it can be overwhelming. We would do anything for our mates…" I emphasized "even if we die in the process."
She seemed to think hard, biting her lip in the process.
"Why are you asking?" I asked, curiosity getting the best of me.
She seemed to hesitate, suddenly nervous.
"What is it?" I insisted, she should know by know that' she could tell me anything.
"Something Irina said…"
I waited for her to go on.
"She called me your mate." Her eyebrows furrowed deeper, as if she wasn't sure about what she was saying.
"That's because you are." I said simply.
"How do you know?" She looked up I could see her eyes burning with curiosity… and something else.
"Because I know, I feel it."
"But you said Irina thought Laurent was her mate," her frown was back "how do you know for sure I'm yours?"
"What Laurent and Irina had was basically a relationship based on sex…" she blushed making me chuckle before continuing "Vampires are mostly lonely creatures, they were both feeling lonely and they found companionship with each other. They were using each other to fill that sense of emptiness, which is common with vampires. Especially in old vampires… did I ever tell you how old the Denali clan are?"
"No."
I laughed.
"Don't ever tell them I told you, Kate's the youngest she is 246" she gasped "Then there's Irina… she is around Carlisle's age, born in the early sixteen hundreds as well and Tanya, well she says she doesn't remember" I smirked "but of course I know better… she's been around since the twelve hundreds."
Her eyes went wide in shock.
"What? But, they are so beautiful and young looking." She gasped.
"Age is just a number, it doesn't really mean anything in our world… especially when you find your mate, as I said it's just a number. Carmen is about a century older than El and it doesn't bother them." I shrugged.
She thought about it before going back to the main topic.
"That still doesn't answer my question. How do you know that what you feel for me is different from Irina's feelings?"
I chuckled without humor and reached for her hand entwining our fingers together. As I knew, the electric current flew between us going up our arms and warming all our bodies from head to toe.
"Do you feel that?"
She nodded a little bit dazed.
"That's one of the reasons how I know, our bodies reaction to one another's. The attraction, it's not just lust. You are as made for me as I am made for you."
She seemed to think about this for a long moment, and I noticed how she never retrieved her hand from mine. I brushed my thumb over her knuckles while a peaceful smile spread over myself. I missed her touch, it was amazing how the feeling of her skin against mine put my mind at ease so quickly.
"Is this ok?" I asked, squeezing her hand because no matter how good it felt, I still didn't want to push her. But her hear beat accelerated, and I put a mask on my face to hid my triumphant smile. I knew it, she still feels something she just won't admit it to herself.
She seemed dazed and out of it for a moment before nodding.
"What else?" She breathed after a couple more minutes.
"When I'm with you, sometimes I swear I feel my heart beat again… you make me feel alive. Not even Lizzie can do that, it's hard to explain… she gives me a reason for living but, you are my life."
We went silent again after that, Bella seemed to be too deep in thought so I left her to her own thoughts, although still holding her hand. I was greedy, I've longed to feel her touch for so long, I'm taking as much as I can.
It wasn't until several minutes later that I heard her labored breathing that I sent her a worried glance.
"Are you Ok?" I stopped, and since I still held her hand forced her to stop too. When I caught a good look at her face I stiffened. "Bella you are pale." I touched her forehead, she was cold.
"I'm so out of shape," she laughed it off "I think I need to sit down a bit."
I guided her to a bed flower next to a tree, she sat down and reclined against the trunk closing her eyes.
"Love, your heart beat is a little high… are you sure you are ok?"
"Yeah, just a bit dizzy. I haven't done any exercise for years."
"Momma! Are you ok?!" Lizzie asked worriedly coming to a stop next to where I was kneeling in front of Bella. Concern all over her beautiful features.
"Yes sweetie just got a little tired. How far are we?" She asked me.
"About fifteen more minutes, are you up for it? Or you want me to carry you?"
"I'm fine, just give me a sec."
"Daddy, why don't you take mommy on your back? Like you take me?" Lizzie said worriedly.
I looked at Bella.
"I'd prefer that too," I said carefully "you are too pale, that can't be good."
She seemed to struggle with herself, but at last she relented with a nod.
I helped her on her feet and crouched so she could wrap her arms around my neck and then her legs around my torso.
"How about a little race?" I smirked down at our daughter, who beamed at me before taking off at lightning speed.
We heard her laugher as we chase after her, Bella's strong heartbeat beating against my back and I swear, this time I heard mine beat too as I heard her laugh too. I don't think I've been this peaceful in a while, knowing both of my girls were happy, healthy and here with me.
It's just a matter of seconds until we finally reach the small lake, and I put Bella back on her feet.
I instantly see the wonder in her eyes, it is a beautiful place and she says this out loud.
"It's not like our meadow, but it does the trick." I say back winking at her at which she blushes.
"Daddy, can I run now?"
"Just make sure I can still hear you, and Seth is going with you." I tell her.
"Ok! Thank you daddy!" She kisses my cheek before going around the lake with Seth after her in his wolf form.
I look up and see Bella sitting on a rock by the edge of the lake, she had a serene look on her face.
"What are you thinking?"
"Charlie, he used to bring me fishing to places like this when I was little."
…
…
"I'm sorry I wasn't there." I said sincerely.
She shrugs.
"How would you have known?"
I sit next to her on the ground.
"If I hadn't left, I would have known… or maybe nothing would have happened at all."
"Edward," She says my name slowly, carefully "I don't blame you for Charlie's death. You had nothing to do with it."
"But I could have prevented it."
"How? None of the wolves saw Laurent coming, what makes you think you would?"
"You heard him. Laurent was looking for me, when he didn't find me he went to your house." I grimaced. No matter what, in the end it was still my fault Charlie was killed. I started this war with Victoria I should have killed her back in Forks after James' demise.
"It still wasn't your fault, you didn't kill him."
She was quiet then, a somber look taking her features.
"You want to talk about it?" I asked in a whisper, I was surprised she heard me.
"What's the point? It won't bring him back." Her voice trembled and she brought her knees to her chest, hugging her legs.
"It might help you, getting it off your chest. Tell me what you feel."
"You already know how I feel, or haven't you heard Jasper's thoughts?" She said a little resentful.
"It's not for me Bella, it's for you… I think if you vent a little, it might help you heal."
"I don't need help." She snapped, her walls coming back up.
Damn it! I could practically see her getting away from me again.
"Bella, no one is invincible." I tried to reason with her "Vampire, human or werewolf it's ok to seek help. I can tell you are holding so much inside it's eating at you… you need to let go of this stuff, look at what happened to you the other night? You had a breakdown which is ok but, what if that happens again in front of Lizzie?"
"I don't know what you want me to do here Edward."
"Tell me what you feel." I insisted.
"You already know, you saw it the other night."
"Bell-"
"I said I don't wanna talk about it!" She snapped "Stop it."
I sighed, she had her walls up again. God, I thought we had made progress today.
"I just want to help you Bella."
"I don't want your help."
Her mood had made a 180 it seemed. She stood up and whistled for our daughter to come.
"Yes, momma?" Lizzie said happily, appearing next to us and Bella smiled down at her, taking her hand.
"Nothing honey, just checking in on you. Don't go too far you can't hear me Ok?"
"But daddy can hear me, and Seth's with me… I'm safe." She frowned.
"Still, stay near me too."
"Ok momma." Lizzie responded like the good girl she was "You wanna see what I saw?" She smiled sweetly then and Bella smiled back, her mood changing drastically again.
"Always." She said before placing Lizzie's hand on her cheek.
An hour later we decide to head back, and since Lizzie was getting sleepy after the run she was on Seth's back, riding him like a horse. Bella and I were silent, we hadn't talk to each other since she shut me out by the lake. I felt as if we had taken like ten steps back, everything was going so great I wonder what the trigger was. Was it me asking her about Charlie? Our earlier conversation about mates? I don't know but I was planning on confronting her as soon as we put Lizzie to bed. I needed to know what was bothering her. We should be able to talk all this stuff out… I wanted her to trust me aga-
I stopped on my tracks, my skin standing on end. Bella bumped into my shoulder and Seth growled.
Something is wrong.
I look around me, instantly on alert and venom flowing all over my mouth. There was a scent I couldn't recognize, but definitely a Vampire. The scent was strong, new and everywhere, just minutes old. I looked around, no one was around and I couldn't hear anyone either.
"Edward, what is it?" Bella asked, I hadn't realized I had taken a protective stand in front of her and Lizzie, who Bella was now carrying protectively in her arms as well.
"Stay here." I hissed and followed the trail.
And sure enough, as I predicted the trail led to the house. I couldn't hear anyone inside but that didn't mean anything so as silently as possible I went through the house. My vision turned to red when I realized the scent was more potent in direction of Bella's room. I flew the stairs up to the third floor, and choked on my own breath when I saw her room. It was a chaos, her clothes were a mess everywhere, drawers and doors wide open.
Damn it!
God, what if Bella had been here alone? The pure thought filled me with rage and fear at the same time. I took my phone out and dialed Carlisle's number. I still could hear Seth's mind so I knew him and the girls were ok for now.
"Someone was at the house." I said as soon as he answered.
Carlisle was silent, probably shocked.
"Vampire?"
"Yes, I didn't recognize his scent. Although is everywhere around the house and the woods. He or she turned Bella's room upside down." I said through gritted teeth.
"The others are still working at the cottage?"
"Yes."
"Call them and secure the house, I'll be there in an hour."
In record time, I was able to clean up Bella's room leaving it spotless again. Thankfully nothing was broken so she wouldn't notice. Then, I proceeded to pull down the iron windows though the whole the house.
"A nomad passing through?" Esme suggested.
We were all in the big living room now, except for Jasper and Emmett who have been swooping the forest, tracking the unwanted visitor for about four hours now.
"Our scent is everywhere, a nomad wouldn't have left. They would be too curious about us." Rosalie said not really looking at me.
"How old was it?" Carlisle asked then, breaking the tension between Rosalie and me. She didn't do anything wrong but I still had a hard time not pulling her hair out every chance I got.
"Just minutes old… if it wasn't a nomad what do you suggest?" I asked him.
Lizzie jumped from the couch were she was sitting on Bella's lap and I caught her, she wrapped her arms and legs around me and hid her face in my neck. I rubbed her back comfortingly, knowing she was scared.
"I didn't recognized the scent either" Carlisle said "but… Rosalie is right, a nomad wouldn't pass the opportunity to meet new acquaintances. So that only leaves-"
"No," I said immediately, my skin crawling at the thought. "Why would a Volturi guard be here? It makes no sense."
"Maybe they were dealing with the newborns in Kamloomps and brought a message from Aro."
I shook my head.
"We weren't away that long, if Aro wanted to deliver you a message he would have stayed."
Alice groaned in the background, she was trying to see around Seth and Lizzie so she was having a headache.
"What if… what if it was one of those newborns?" Bella asked quietly.
I could hear the fear in her voice, she had heard Jasper talk about them before so she was scared with reason, but her eyes told me she wasn't scared for her as they kept glancing from my face towards our daughter.
"I don't think so, we are still very far away from the border." I tried to calm her.
"She is right," Rosalie spoke again "a nomad would have stayed but a lonely newborn would have been to scared to mingle around the scent of seven vampires. That would also explained the mess he made in Bella's room."
Fuck.
"WHAT?!" Bella screeched then and I shut my eyes close, silently cursing Rosalie. "Is that true?" She asked me with furious eyes.
"I didn't want to worry you." I said honestly. I had told them about Bella's room while she was making hers and Lizzie's dinner in the kitchen away from us.
"When were you planning on telling me this?" She looked truly hurt and disappointed. I wanted to kick myself, right after dismembering Rosalie.
"It didn't matter, I won't let anything happen to you."
"Seth," she gritted her teeth together, damn I was in trouble "would you please take Lizzie upstairs?"
As soon as Seth and a crying Lizzie were gone, her eyes shone with pure anger towards me.
"God!" She threw her arms in the air "I knew it! You haven't changed one bit…" she said bitterly "if I am the reason why Lizzie is in danger of course I'd like to know!" She glared.
"Bell-"
"When are you going to get it in your thick skull that I'm not a fucking damsel in distress!" She screamed and one by one my family left the room "We've been through this! I'm Elizabeth's parent too, I'm supposed to take care of her as well. Stop making decision for me! I want to know anything that concerns her and me too!"
"I didn't think it was that important!"
"Then why didn't you tell me!"
"I didn't want to worry you for no reason! I won't let anything happen to any of you, I swear!"
"You are not invincible! You said so yourself! Vampire, human or werewolf we all need help! You want to know what I need from you? I need you to see me as an equal and not your weak, unworthy little human of an ex!"
"I never said that!" I growled, I was angry now too. "Stop putting things in my mouth!"
"Then you stop speaking for me! Don't ever hide something like this again, if someone is after me I want to know! Lizzie sleeps with me every night, if that puts her in danger I wanna know! If taking walks with her is risky I wanna know too! I should be able to protect her too!"
"Bella, it doesn't change anything! What difference does it make?! You can't fight a male human on your own, much less a newborn! You are still recovering from your illness, I wanted to spare you the worry!"
"It might be hard for you to believe but I'm not stupid, I know I'm not as strong as you so I'm not talking about protecting her physically! If me being a human puts her in danger, then I should go!"
"No you don't, you are safe here. Both of you!" I screamed panicking, she couldn't leave.
She sneered at the same time her eyes filled with hurtful tears.
"You can't tell me what to do." She spat, and with that she walked out of the room and run upstairs to her room.
"Fuck!" I screamed, flipping over the coffee table with enough force to send it flying across the room.
I sat on the couch and tried to breathe through my nose to calm myself. I could hear Bella crying upstairs in her room and that only made things harder. I was an ass, I should have told her. I couldn't believe many of the things I said either.
"AGHHHH!" I screamed again, pulling at my hair in frustration.
Fifteen minutes later, Emmett and Jasper burst into the room. Thankfully ignoring the mess I had done.
"We followed the trail until we reached an old deserted road, it disappears there. A car must have been waiting."
Fear creep up my whole body.
…
…
"I don't like it." I said.
"Me neither." Jasper added.
-SLA-
His lips traveled down, brushing my neck, my chest… waking every nerve in my body, setting them on fire. I could feel him, all of him but I could still feel his fear… his hesitation. I laced my fingers through his hair, bringing his mouth back to min before forcing him to look me in the eyes again.
"Don't be scared… I want this, I want you."
He kissed me again, deeply and passionate.
"I love you." He rested his forehead on mine.
"I love you, too." I whimpered, I couldn't believe this was happening. I was so happy, so full of bliss. I still couldn't believe this beautiful creature wanted me, it was so surreal. A dream come true.
He moved above me, aligning himself and I took a breath. This was it.
My vision blurred, a lone tear falling down my left eye, he leaned down kissing it away. Could he see the great love I had for him through my eyes? Could he finally see and understand I wanted him forever? That I would do anything for him? Even leaving my family and life behind for him by joining his world?
His lips found mine again, taking in my gasp as he finally joined our bodies as one.
Dun, dun, duuuuun! Who was at the house? Do you think Bella was a bit dramatic? What did you think about the "mate" talk?
As I said before, we are getting there I promise! Have a little patience, like one or two more chapters?
Anyway, while I was sick I read some amazing fanfic by an incredible author: pattyrose
I'm currently reading a third fanfic written by her, but I recommend you "The Cullen Legacy" then jump to "Indicent Proposal" right now I'm reading "This is who I am" I've never read so many fanfic by the same author (with the exception of CaraNo of course) and she is amazing! If you like my story, "One More Chance" Then you should read "The Cullen Legacy" it's waaaaay better to be honest and it's about the same theme and their characters aren as frustrating as pretty girl and pretty boy LOL!
Till next time! (Soon, I promise!)
Tammy