Hi? Is anyone there? Oh well... I'll just leave this here for the ones who are still bearing with me and my lateness ;)
I suggest you to put on your seat belts guys, things are about to get hectic!
Mistakes are all mine, I have no betas, last time I posted someone offered but since I know you've been waiting for this update I didn't want to delay it anymore. But I'll repost as soon as she's done with it =)
SM owns everything.
Chapter: 29
"Scarecrow" – Alex & Sierra
I'm standin' still without you
In the emptiest of fields
I wish that I could say what's on my mind
The straw that fills your heart
So you never have to feel
You say that you just need a little time
Days like these I bury my
My each and every word
And hide them underneath these lonely trees
The harvest moon is wicked
I know that you've been hurt
I swear I'm here for good I'll never leave
This is where it starts tonight
If you open up your heart tonight
You're staring out the window
And I'm out here in the street
You stand there like a scarecrow
And I'm begging you to speak
You used to be my solid ground
Now I'm drowning in the sea
And I just want to believe in you and me
I just want to believe in you and me
You used to be so full of life
Not just an empty shell
You're out there all alone I wonder why
…
You said you'd open up for me
Well nothing's what it seems to be
How can I make you feel again
Only you can make me real again
"The witches?" I ask with a rigid voice.
"Yes, Alec and Jane. With so many newborns they need Alec, Jane's leading the guard, you know how Aro trusts her." Garret answers me, walking in the direction of the house. We all move along with him, subtly forming a circle around him.
"And they'll be here within two weeks?" Eleazar asks clarifying and Garret stops and turns to him.
"Yes, I have a friend in the second guard. I run into him in England, he told me the second guard is staying to guard the palace and Aro and his brothers. They've been having trouble with the Russians, that's why they haven't been able to act sooner."
"Is there anyone else coming?" I ask, itching to go back into the house and take Bella and Lizzie away.
"I don't know… maybe? It's not very often we have a massacre this big. It has got a lot of us curious and want to join the fun." He says walking past us and heading for the house. "Why do you all look so shocked?" He turns around, walking backwards "This was bound to happen sooner or lat-" Garret stiffens just as he reaches the back porch, not a full second has passed when Tanya, Emmet and I are blocking the door.
"What is that? Is there a human in the house?"Garret thinks, already placing Bella's heart beat on the top floor, his pupils dilate and his body tenses with adrenaline.
"Step back Garret." I hiss, stepping in front of him and breaking his vision at the top floor. He looks at me in confusion. My whole family has him surrounded by now in a tight circle. He stares at all us us in shock.
"Carlisle, what's going on? Why do you have a human in there?"
"Bella is part of our family," Carlisle says in a calm voice. "No harm is coming towards her… or Lizzie."
"Carlisle!" I yell enraged.
"Edward, he already smelled her… he might help us." Carlisle says patiently and I glare at him.
"Who's Lizzie?" Garret asks confused, his body tense from all the hostile vampires surrounding him.
Carlisle sighs.
"Bella is Edwards mate… and Lizzie is their daughter."
Shit.
Garret's eyes become as wide as saucers, his face contorts in terror, horror and fear before he composes and looks at me with an incredulous expression on his face.
"You made an immortal child?! Holy shit! Carlisle!" He turns to Carlisle with horrified disbelief "Why would you allow this?! You know you are all dead, right?!" He says looking around us and stepping back as far as he can in our circle.
"Garret, calm down please. It's not what you think, let-" Carlisle tries to calm him but Garret speaks over him.
"Wait a minute… you were in Washington…" He thinks aloud "is she the reason behind all that blood?!"
"WHAT?! NO!" I'm quick to explain, god I never thought he would come to this conclusion "Elizabeth is not an immortal child… she is my biological daughter, you smelled her when you got here."
"Edward, I'm not stupid… that's impossible." He says disgusted and I roll my eyes.
"Just, let me explain."
"No, I'm out. I can't be part of this." He says jumping out of the circle and heading for the woods."
"Stop him!" I scream.
We all go after him, Tanya is the first one to grab him but Garret being stronger and taller shakes her off easily throwing her against a spruce. Kate hisses and throws herself at him. She uses her gift by wrapping her arms around him and electrocuting him until he ends up on his knees and then lying on the ground.
"God woman!" He screams in pain as he opens his eyes and sees Kate on top of him with a devilish smile.
She leans down and whispers menacingly on his ear.
"And that was just a little taste, touch my sister again and believe me you'll wish you were dead."
Garret smiles back and says in a challenging tone.
"Kate, right?"
Kate rolls her eyes and stands up, Garret stays on the ground, still recuperating from the after shakes.
"Garret, please listen to me."
"Edward, Carlisle is one of my oldest friends…" He says, his body still pressed to the ground and eyes staring straight up at the sky. "Please don't put me in a bad place. I don't want to know." He finishes closing his eyes.
"But we have done nothing wrong… just, please listen. What do you hear?" I wait a few seconds before continuing "Do you hear that fluttering sound?" I point to the third floor and after a few more seconds he nods slowly.
"That's her heartbeat." I say referring to my daughter's strange heart "Blood runs through her veins. I swear to you she is not an immortal child."
Slowly, he turns to his side and stands up on his feet, cleaning himself up from small leaves and twigs from his round with Tanya and Kate before staring at me once again.
"If what you say it's true," he pauses, thinking about his words "then why have you kept her hidden all this time?" He asks still skeptical. "And how on earth did you conceived a child with a human?"
I raise an eyebrow.
He snorts.
"I'm being serious Edward. How's that possible."
"We have a lot of theories, but that's not important right now. What's important is that no one can know about her, especially Aro. She's… special" I don't want to divulge about Lizzie's healing tears "She's gifted and we have only found one other of her kind. You know Aro, he likes to collect rare things."
He purses his lips, still not believing me.
"Edward, why don't you bring Elizabeth and Bella down... so they can meet our friend." Carlisle suggests, but I don't move. "Edward, we need him." He presses.
By now, Garret's too curious to run away. He's an adventurer, he loves a good mystery, and this is a too good one to pass up. His eyes are glued to the window on the third floor, his senses focused solely on my daughter, her movements, her breathing… her heartbeat.
I sigh.
"Emmett." With a look, I tell my brother to come with me and we both walk inside the house.
We reach the third floor, and I knock on Lizzie's room. Carefully, Seth opens the door.
"Are you really bringing them outside?" Seth asks with a glare, I glare back. Of course he heard everything that went down outside.
"We don't really have an option, if he leaves thinking she's an immortal child we'll have the entire guard in our backyard by midnight."
His glare is replaced by fear.
"What? Why? What's an immortal child?"
I sigh, this possibility never occurred to me. Someone seeing Lizzie and assuming she's an immortal child. One more problem to add to the pile.
"I'll explain later, just… please trust me. Garret has to see her."
He nods before opening the door and letting me in.
"Can you please wait outside? I need to talk to Bella alone." I tell him. He rolls his eyes and I know it doesn't really make a difference, everyone in this house has super human hearing but I know it'll mean something to Bella at least.
With a last glance at Lizzie, Seth steps out of the room with Emmett and wait on the hallway. I turn around and see Bella sitting on Lizzie's bed, with our daughter sleeping on her lap. Her face is pale, and I can see the fear in her expression. I kneel before her and grab her hand in mine.
"Are you Ok?"
She nods without looking at me, and starts playing with our daughter's hair.
"I'm sorry about before." I whisper, her eyes are red with unshed tears "I'm so sorry, angel but please try to understand. There are a lot of things up in the air right now, and… I need to focus solely on your safety first."
"I want to help, Edward." She whispers harshly, not leaving her eyes from our daughter's face "Elizabeth's my daughter too, I want to protect my family." She looks up at me "I want to protect you too." She wipes a tear with the back of her hand.
I take her hand and kiss her knuckles, her wrist, then her lips. Resting my forehead on hers.
"Bella, you already do protect me." I say quietly.
She shakes her head.
"I don't understand." Her voice breaks and I pull back a little so she can see my eyes.
"Bella, the only thing that can hurt me is you... I don't have anything else to be afraid of. I've told you before, you're my only reason to stay alive."
"You can't protect me from everything, at some point something's going to separate us. An accident, an illness, old age... or Victoria. The only solution is to change me."
"Not like this, Bella." I shake my head.
"Why not?" Her voice breaks again
I look at her strangely.
"The very first day you got here I told you that I would change you if that's what you wanted, I asked you again several times afterwards, and you always said no. Suddenly you want it? Just because we are in danger?" She stays quiet and I continue "Bella that's not a reason to give up your soul, I promise I'll do everything in my power to keep you and Lizzie safe. There's no need for this decision to be made now."
"Edward… I really, really want it."
"Why?"
"Because…" she pauses "because… I… I want to do something. I'm tired of everyone pushing me around," She points outside the window "I want to be out there with you… forming a barrier between them and our daughter" she is crying now "I don't want to be useless… I want be able to stand next to you and feel strong and beautiful and-"
I interrupt her speech with a kiss, I cup her jaw between my hands and force her to look into my eyes. My heart breaking in pieces at seeing her so broken, have I made her this insecure? Can't she see what she does to me? What she means to me? What can I do to prove to her that I don't want or need anything else?
"I know where you are heading with this, angel. And I hate to interrupt you but can we please have this conversation tonight? Alone?" I say giving her a look, there are too many ears around.
Her eyes widen, as if she's remembering now we are not alone. She nods and straightens her back.
"Yes, I'm sorry."
I kiss her again.
"Don't apologize. We'll talk later just… just remember. I love you, only you, Ok?"
She nods.
"Ok."
I smile tightly at her and give her a last kiss. The pain never lessens, every time I tell her I love her and she doesn't say it back… the pain is always the same. I should be used to it.
I look down at our daughter, she's sleeping soundly with her head on her mother's lap. I hate to wake her up but it's necessary. I take her hand and place it on my cheek, getting a glimpse of her colorful dreams. I smile at what I see.
She's playing around in our meadow back in forks. I chuckle when I see she has a little kitten on her lap. Strange, I'd have thought she would want a puppy… well, she has Seth already, so.
I lean down and start peppering her face with kisses. She stirs and giggles sleepily.
"No, daddy…" she giggles again "stop." She hides her face on her momma's lap.
"But you are so yummy!" I laugh with her caressing her hair "Can you wake up for daddy?"
"She sleeps? Vampires don't sleep." Garret thinks outside, analyzing everything he hears and sees, he's even more curious now. I don't know if that's a good or a bad thing. If word gets out and more vampires become curious, this could easily reach Aro's ears within days. That's why Garret needs to be in our side, he needs to keep our secret.
Lizzie finally opens her sleepy eyes and stares at me with a smile. God, she is so beautiful. Just like her mother.
"Can we go play outside now?" She asks and my heart falls again.
"I'm sorry angel, we'll have to play indoors for a while."
"But I'm bored." Bella and I exchange a look.
"Just for a couple more weeks honey, then we'll do whatever you want. Ok?" I say.
I was already planning ahead. I'll take Elizabeth and Bella away, I'll take them to our house in Alaska with the Denalis, their scent won't be strong there with the snow storms and wait until the Volturi come and finish with the newborns and are gone. The rest of my family will stay here to keep up with appearances and if someone asks for me, being vampire or human they'll just say I got bored and went away on a long trip or something. Too many vampires are going to descend soon around the area, I can't risk anymore surprise visits like Garret's.
"Ok, daddy."
"Now, there's someone outside that wants to meet you." I brush her hair away from her face.
"Who?"
"His name is Garret, he's an old friend of grandpa Carlisle… he just arrived here."
She sits down and I chuckle at her messy hair.
"Is he a vampire like you?"
"Yes."
She frowns.
"Why does he want to meet me, daddy?"
"Because you are special, remember?" I wink at her.
"So I can be myself with him? Or do I have to act like a human?"
I can hear Garret's mind analyzing everything Lizzie says, the way she says it, what and how. He knew immortal kids couldn't be contained or taught so he had expected an spoiled, irrational, self centered and demanding kid, like the immortal children from our legends. Instead, he got a sweet, happy, sensitive and insecure girl, obviously smart and aware of her surroundings.
"Interesting."
"Oh, what if he doesn't like me?"
I can't make promises that don't depend on me, for all I know Garret will freak out and run away to Italy.
"Everything is going to be fine princess, you have a whole family that loves you and that's more important."
"Nanna always says that."
"Nanna Esme is very smart." Bella chuckles.
"Now, Elizabeth… Garret might get a little…mhmm curious and might ask you a lot of questions. He has never met someone like you so he'll want to know everything he can. But you don't have to answer if you don't want you, Ok? Remember when you met Tanya and her family?"
"Yes, you carried me and told me to pat your shoulder when it was enough."
"Exactly, if you feel uncomfortable just pat my shoulder and mommy and I'll bring you back upstairs. Alright?"
"Momma's gonna be there too?"
I stare at Bella and she nods at me then at our daughter.
"Of course baby." She kisses Lizzie's head "Alright, let's not keep our guest waiting."
"You want me or momma to carry you?"
Lizzie extends her arms towards me, indicating me to carry her. I place her gladly on mi hip and she immediately hides her face on my neck. I chuckle at her, her brain might be that of a ten year old and her body of a six year old but she is still a baby at heart.
"You want your blankie?" I poke her side and she nods. Bella hands her her torn blanket and we are ready to go.
I can understand why Elizabeth get's so nervous around strangers, and it's something we should work harder on as soon as this mess is over. Her entire life until she came to live with us Bella kept her hidden in their home at La Push, afraid that someone might see her. She barely had any contact outside Jacob and Seth's family because she didn't know how to act, or move or how to be around them. That made her insecure, and I know she's getting better with school and her ballet lessons but it's still hard for her to meet new people since it's not something she's used to. Because even around Vampires, no one can know about that other gift of hers, not even the Denali's know so she has to hold out.
We reach the back door and I take Bella's hand in mine before whispering.
"Please stay close to me."
She nods and Emmett opens the door for us.
Garret's eyes land on Bella for half a second before zeroing on our daughter. He's in shock, not believing what his eyes are seeing. He sees Lizzie, he hears her heartbeat and sees the blood rushing through her veins, he sees it in the pinkness of her skin but it's hard for him to accept it, he struggles to believe what his eyes see. He can smell her unique scent, she doesn't smell like a vampire at all but not human either.
I pause, not wanting to get any closer to him. I feel Lizzie move her head and see through everyone's eyes that she's trying to peek but hides her face back in my neck.
But that small peek was enough, Garret sees the resemblance between her and me. Garret notices that our hair color matches and even though Lizzie is hiding half her face on my shoulder he can still see her chin and nose which are a rounder and softer version of mine. But most importantly, he got a glimpse of Elizabeth's eyes. Brown, not red or black, brown. Just like the human standing next to me.
"Impossible." He says in awe.
Bella clings to Lizzie and me, although more in a protective way than afraid. Her heartbeat is oddly calm next to me, maybe because she can see my family separating Garret from Lizzie.
"Bella," I snake my arm around Bella's waist, bringing her even closer to my side "this is Garret. He's an old friend of Carlisle. Garret… this is my mate, Bella."
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Bella." Garret says, but his eyes can't leave my daughter.
"Nice to meet you too." Bella answers quietly.
While my eyes don't miss Garret's every move, I notice through my siblings' minds that Bella keeps staring at Garret's red eyes. He's not thirsty, but that doesn't mean he'll restrain if he finds Bella's scent too appetizing.
"Lizzie, sweetie…" I kiss my daughters head in a hurry to move on "Can you say hi to Garret for me, please?"
Slowly, Lizzie's face leaves my shoulder and gives Garret a look. She stares at him curiously, she has never seen a nomad before and by touching my neck, she quietly asks me her own questions.
"Why are his clothes so dirty? Is he a friend? Would he hurt mommy? What's that hanging from his neck? Is he alone? Where's his family? What's his favorite movie? Does he like Frank Sinatra like you, daddy?"
I chuckle and Garret gives me a quizzical look.
"She's curious… she has some questions."
"How do you know?" He asks in awe.
"Lizzie, why don't you show Garret your questions?"
By reading Garrets mind, I know he won't attack her, he's not afraid, he's too curious and fascinated.
"Show?" He asks in wonder.
"She's gifted…" I take a step forward "she's special, Lizzie would you like to show Garret your gift?"
"What if he thinks I'm a freak?"
I laugh at that.
"We are all freaks around here honey. Why don't you tell Garret a little bit about yourself in your special way and then he'll tell you something about himself?" I tell her before addressing to Garret "Her gift is special, kind of backwards of what I do… she has to touch you."
Garret takes an eager step forward and Rosalie, Emmet and Carmen are immediately blocking his way.
"It's ok," Jasper says "he's calm enough, he won't hurt any of them."
I nod in Jasper's direction, affirming his statement.
Carmen moves slowly and Garret is able to walk closer our way, he stops a couple feet away from us so to not scare Lizzie.
"Hello Miss Elizabeth," He smiles at my daughter "nice to make you acquaintance, what a lovely young girl you are. I'm Garret." He makes a grand gesture of bowing his head before giving her his hand.
Lizzie stares at Garret's hand for a long second, then she looks into Garret's eyes and back at his hand again. She does this a couple times before settling on his eyes before smiling shyly and lifting her hand in Garret's direction. Garret looks at me for permission, after I nod in confirmation he leans down and lets Lizzie touch his cheek.
Immediately, Garret's eyes un-focus and I'm able to see what Lizzie's showing him.
"What is she showing him?" Bella asks me quietly.
"She's telling him everything, about her life in La Push, her fast growing, you, Seth, me," her isolation, Bella's illness, how she came to live with me. "About her ballet lessons and school... She's now telling him about our runs, and how I hunt for her."
When Lizzie is done she retracts her hand and cuddles back to my side and I take a step back. Garret's too shocked for words, he doesn't know what to say.
Suddenly, he starts laughing.
"Oh, boy!" He turns to Carlisle "You are so damn lucky Aro's not coming!"
"Can we trust you'll keep Lizzie's existence a secret?" I ask.
"You have my word my friend, but it's not me you should worry about, or the other nomads. Once the Voltury arrive to America, if they catch her scent along with hers" He points towards Bella "They'll come looking for answers… and it won't help you have a child of the moon within your coven, that'll only anger Caius."
"He's not really a werewolve," I say and Seth's head perks up "He doesn't need the moon to phase, he's a Quileute he was born with it, its part of their legends."
"Caius won't care about that, he'll just need any excuse to get rid of all of you and take the girl away."
"It won't come to that," I hiss holding Lizzie tighter "we are leaving tonight, by the time the Volturi cross this territory their scent will be long gone."
"You can't hide forever Edward, maybe Aro will see past Lizzie and the wolf and would like to just follow her progress through the years but he won't see past her" He points at Bella "she needs to be changed. You don't want anymore things against you."
Bella stiffens next to me.
"Seth, can you take Lizzie inside, please?" Bella says.
"Of course, c'mon beautiful." Seth takes a reluctant Lizzie from me and takes them both inside the house. As soon as the door is close behind them Bella turns to me with blazing eyes.
"See? I told you, change me. Please!"
"Not like this!" I hiss.
"Damn it Edward! You are sentencing all your family to death! Carlisle, please tell him!"
"No! I don't want to hear it anymore, you should have a choice. Non of us did, I won't change you like this. End of story!"
Bella ignores me and goes to stand in front of Carlisle.
"Carlisle, please… I know you can do it. Please, change me."
Carlisle looks uncomfortable, but I know what's on his mind.
"What?! Are you insane?!" I say incredulous "No!"
"Edward, she's right… I'm sorry son but you chose not to live without her, if the Volturi find out about her, they'll kill her."
I shake my head and turn Bella around so she'll see me.
"Bella, nothing will happen to you. I swear, I have a plan!"
"Yes, but it sucks! We'll go with mine!"
"Woman's got balls." Garret chuckles and Emmett joins him but I ignore both of them.
"Bella," I say calmly, trying to regain my composure "please listen to me. Once you are changed, there's no way back. Please think about it, it's not an easy life, the first months you wouldn't even be able to be near Lizzie, you'll be too controlled by your thirst you might hurt her."
"I wouldn't hurt my own daughter." She says firmly.
"It doesn't work like that, the moment you wake up you'll be controlled by your thirst, your body and reason won't be yours anymore."
"If that's what it takes, then I'll stay away from her."
"That's the type of things I don't want you to sacrifice, what about your mom. Don't you want to talk to her again? Jacob and Leah? They are human, their baby will be too."
"It'll just be for a year… and Rene thinks I'm dead, it's for the best. She can't know about Elizabeth either." She cries.
"Bella, love please… think about it. Is not as easy as you think, if I change you now and the newborns come you'll be crazed with bloodlust, you have no battle skills, you might get hurt."
"And if I stay human I will get killed."
"No, because I'll take you and Lizzie away. I can't do that if you are rotting in pain. If I change you, we'll have to stay for a little longer and that's more dangerous. We need to leave tonight."
Bella's chin quivers and I wrap my arms around her. She starts crying and I sway us, trying to comfort her.
"Edward is right Bella." Carlisle says, coming to a stop next to us. "Although I agree with you, changing you right now won't be prudent."
"Then when." she croaks.
"Two weeks time." A small voice says.
We all turn to our left to see Alice standing next to Jasper, her eyes unfocused, seeing the future.
"What?" I ask, but the only thing I see is Bella. Standing under the bright sun, her pale skin glittering as if made of millions of fine diamonds. She looks up at the sky and opens her eyes.
Blood red eyes.
"I'll change her myself," Alice continues and sets her eyes on Bella "after all this is over if you still want it I'll change you myself."
"No!" I say but Bella ignores me and launches herself at Alice.
"Thank you, thank you!" She cries.
"Damn it!" I pull at my hair, but don't say anything anymore. I bit my tongue so I won't say anything that I'll regret later.
The truth is, my emotions are all over the place… I can't stop feeling hope and joy for her joining me in immortality, but that's the selfish monster in me, the other side of me, the rational side of me knows this is the wrong choice. She's scared, that's the only reason why she's doing this, she's scared the Volturi might punish us, she's scared she'll get hurt, she's scared for Lizzie and she's willing to sacrifice herself for us.
I won't let her, I'll make her see reason.
"We should all get back inside, Garret, we have much to discuss." Carlisle says, patting Garret's back.
Bella loses her grip on Alice and smiles at her, Alice smiles in return, her eyes shinning with unshed tears. It's the first time Bella has hugged her since she came back, and both walk back inside together, Bella asking her questions about how will she do it and where to which Alice answers with a lightly tone, as if they were discussing a lunch date.
I snort and groan and follow after them.
"Sorry Edward, it's for the best." Alice thinks and I ignore her, but not without throwing a furious glare her way first.
When we get inside, I spot my daughter at the piano so I go and sit next to her, needing the distraction. I need to calm my nerves, place my thoughts and think and as always my daughter is my remedy to all my ills.
"Daddy, would you play for me?"
I kiss my daughter's hair.
"Of course princess, what song would you like?"
"Momma's song!"
I chuckle.
"Your wish is my command." I say as Jasper, Eleazar, Carlisle and Garret gather around the living room in the next room, watching the news while Jasper tells Garret about our previous plan of going to Kamloops tonight, but with the Volturi already on their way that plan is now useless.
I start playing and the soothing melody and my daughter's scent helps me clear my head. I close my eyes and loose myself in the notes, thinking about my happy memories, going to my happy place. I remember the day I started composing this song, it was the day I invited Bella to have lunch with me at the cafeteria, when I stole that lemonade bottle tap from her. I still have it in my drawer. When the song ends, I start over again… not wanting to come back to reality just yet.
I feel her presence getting closer, and I open my eyes to see her across the room watching me through the threshold. Her expression is unreadable to anyone in the room, but I know her. I know her better than I know myself, I don't need Jasper's gift to know she's scared, apprehensive and confused. I know she still doubts me, not my feelings for her but my compromise, my word. A part of her still thinks I'll leave her or that I'll get bored or lose interest, a part of her still feels insecure. That's what she meant when she said she didn't want to be useless… that she wanted to be able to stand next to me and feel strong and beautiful… because she still thinks she's not enough, her fears are still there and I'm doing a lousy job at showing her she's strong on her own, that she doesn't need to change to prove anything, much less to me because she owns me completely just for being her.
I lock my eyes with her, and beg her to come closer. She does hesitantly and reclines her hip on the piano crossing her arms across her abdomen.
"Lizzie, would you do me a favor?"
"Yes daddy."
"Aunt Alice printed a few new pictures last week, would you like to decorate the piano with them? I think they'd look great."
"Yes! I'll be right back daddy."
I wink at her.
"We'll be here."
As soon as Lizzie is out of the room, I look up at Bella and nod next to me, asking her silently to sit next to me. I sigh in relief when she does.
…
…
"Is this really what you want?"
She nods.
…
…
"Angel, if this is what you really want… I won't get in the way, I promise."
Her body becomes rigid next to me and her face abruptly turns my way.
"Really?" she asks hopeful and I nod slowly. "This is what I want." She confirms.
I nod.
"Ok, I promise I won't get in the way then. But please… in return can you promise me that after the newborns are gone you are going really think about it? Give it time?"
She sighs.
"Edward, it's for the best."
"For who?"
"For everyone!"
"What about you? What's best for you? Bella please, think about yourself too."
"Why are you so against me becoming like you?"
"I'm not against you becoming like me, there's nothing in the world I'd like most than you joining me in this life."
She looks at me wide eyed.
"I don't understand." She says in a shaky voice.
I stop playing and turn sideways on the bench, taking her hands in mine.
"Bella, this life is really hard… I'd hate to see you suffer and then regret it, regret me for making this decision."
"What makes you think I'll regret it?"
"Because I don't think you truly want it."
"Why?" she tilts her head to the side.
I let out a long sigh.
"Because I told you I would change you if you wanted it before, and you said no. Because I keep telling you I that I love you and I know some part of you still doubts me. I know how you always sacrifice yourself for what you think is right, and right now that's what you are doing and I think once all this is over you are going to realize you made a mistake."
She seems to think over my words, and I keep playing. Letting my words sink in. After I have replayed her song about three times, she slowly reclines her head on my shoulder and speaks in a small voice.
"Edward, you are right… I'm scared." She says in a shaky voice "But, not for the reasons that you think… well, not only for those reasons."
"What are you scared of?" I ask in an equally soft voice.
"Years ago, you swore you loved me, and left… I'm scared that after all is done and there's no more threats… you'll do it again." I close my eyes and bring our foreheads together, fighting the waves of pain "I'm scared, once your duties and responsibilities with me are gone, you'll find me boring again and I won't be able to hold you." She sniffles. "That's why I can't give myself to you entirely… that's why I'm still protecting myself… I don't want to hurt anymore and maybe, if I'm more like you, if I'm as strong and beautiful as you, Lizzie and the rest of your family, then I'll belong with you too."
I pull her onto my lap and hold her tightly in my arms.
"Bella, love, listen to me… I know I made you this insecure, I know this is my fault, but please, believe me when I say that there's no one else in the entire universe I'd rather be with than you. You are my family, you are my only world."
I pull away slightly so she can see the truth in my eyes as I speak.
"Human or Vampire it doesn't matter, because it's you I'm in love with. It's you who's always in my mind, it's you who I'm always looking at in a room full of people, it's you I want to spend the rest of my life with." I whisper, brushing her hair away from her face.
"When I look at you, I don't see your beautiful eyes, your perfect skin or your lovely face… what I see is your beautiful soul, your gentleness, your selflessness, your generosity, your charm and your strength. You are an amazing human being Bella, with so much love to give, with so much to share… that's what I love about you. That's why I'm so damn crazy about you."
She buries her face on my chest and I whisper.
"No matter what you are… human or vampire, or in what world we live in, those things never fade away, so that means I'll always be crazy in love with you no matter where we are. Angel, you had me at your mercy since day one without even knowing, and you still have me at your feet. There's nothing I wouldn't do for you."
She's sobbing now, clutching at my shirt and I just hold her back. Letting my words sink in.
"So baby, as I said if you decide to go ahead with this I won't stop you. But I just ask you to please really think it through, think about your choices and what you really want. You'll always have me, no matter what you decide, I promise you on my mother and our daughter that you'll always have me. Would you please think it through? Would you please think about it and don't make any rash decisions?"
She pulls away and grabs my face, kissing me hard.
"I promise I'll think about my choices." She says after we break apart.
"Thank you." I say, and kiss her again because I just can't get enough of her.
"Daddy!" I hear Lizzie running back into the room "I found them! Sorry I took so long, Auntie Alice couldn't find them! Mommy? Are you sick? Why are you crying?"
"No baby, I'm fine. I'm perfect." Bella smiles down at our daughter before taking my hand again. "Daddy just kissed me better." She winks at me, making me laugh.
"Good! Daddy always makes me feel better too, he's good at it."
"I know. So, princess, what did you get there?" Bella chuckles.
The next couple of minutes, Bella, Lizzie and I separate pictures and bring out Lizzie's paints and glitter. And while Bella and Lizzie paint and re-decorate my green piano I play music for them.
The atmosphere is so happy and relaxed, one by one all the family members start to join us in the second living room where my piano is, starting by Jasper and Alice, he's attracted by the calmness and happiness of the moment and Alice trying to distract herself from her headaches. The Denali sisters are sitting on the nearest couch talking quietly, Esme and Carlisle by the window listening to the music. Emmet, Eleazar and Garret are still on the first living room watching the news.
We stay in our bubble for god knows how long, until Alice becomes restless and starts cleaning the room from paint stains and glitter that fell to the floor.
"What's wrong with Alice?" Bella asks.
"She's frustrated because she can't see Victoria."
"Should I be concerned about that?"
I shake my head.
"Victoria's alone, there's eleven of us, twelve now with Garret and he's an extremely good fighter. You are safe."
"Are you going to Kamloops tonight?"
I shake my head.
"There's no point anymore. With the Volturi already on their way our best bet is to leave as soon as possible so there would be no trace of us."
"So when are we leaving?"
"Tomorrow will be Tanya, Kate, and Garret, on Tuesday it'll be us with Emmet, Jasper, Seth and Alice. Esme, Carlisle, Eleazar and Rosalie will stay in case the Volturi visit so they can cover for us and no one tries to track us."
"Why are we breaking up? Isn't it better if we all travel together?"
I shake my head again.
"Too many vampires on the move might be suspicious, it might attract attention and with the Volturi close we don't want that. We'll have to leave in small groups, take different routes but stay close in case someone needs help."
She nods slowly.
"Are we taking a plane?"
"Well drive to Edmonton, then take the plane to Anchorage and then drive to Denali."
"We are not staying at your house in Anchorage?"
"Tanya's house is bigger and it's closer to the city than ours in Anchorage and both you and Lizzie need close access to civilization, just in case."
She rolls her eyes in a condescending way.
"Lizzie doesn't really need civilization, I know that's just for my benefit. Thank you."
I smile at her.
"I love you."
She smiles shyly back at me and opens her mouth, but as soon as the words are about to fall from her lips, a loud shattering sound echoes through the room, startling us all. We all turn with wide eyes to the source, only to see a petrified Alice by the threshold with a horrified expression, her face pale, eyes wide and glass from what used to be a vase all around her feet.
She is staring right at me, and for the first time in almost a century I feel as cold as ice.
"Alice? What's wrong?" Jasper asks in concern.
…
…
"They are coming here…" she cries.
"Who?"
"The newborns… they have Bella's red sweater."
You know what this means right? MY version of a tent scene is up next ;)!
Soooo what do you think everyone should do? Who should they ask for help? What did Bella mean about thinking her choices? What do you think is going on that big head of hers?
Love you all and... I guess I see you soon? Seriously! Don't look at me like that! I mean it!
¡Saludos!
Tammy