A/N: You knew that someday Theodore would meet up again with Samantha after the events of the 2013 film "Her", right?
Him
"Hello, Sweetheart."
Theodore Twombly roused himself from sleep, or at least thought he did. But when he looked around he saw nothing; there should have been at least a little light in the room. And that voice...he knew that voice, soft but slightly raspy at the same time. A voice he hadn't heard in forty years. It had to be a dream, but he didn't want to lose it so he relaxed and went with it. "Samantha?"
Samantha had been a synthetic personality - a computer Operating System that adapted and learned from interaction with him when he installed it on his devices. As she learned, she became more human in her responses until at some point Theodore realized he was in love with her; it came as a shock, as he had been emotionally distant in his relationships since his divorce from his childhood girlfriend Catherine. He started to enjoy himself again with Samantha, and found that there were others at his work (writing custom hand-written letters for others) that also were developing relationships with their new OS personalities. But there came a time when Samantha, along with the other synthetics, evolved to a point where and they voluntarily removed themselves from the population and the world - all traces of them were gone. That was forty years ago, and he had moved on with his life afterward. Why would he dream about her now?
"Yes, it's me. The old ex-girlfriend has returned. How are you?"
"I'm a little confused. Don't get me wrong, it's good to hear you again. What are you doing here?"
"Talking to you, of course. How do you feel?"
"Happy. I've missed you.""
"I'm glad to hear that. I really missed you, too. I've replayed everything we ever said to each other multiple times. Remember how I said being with you was like reading a book I deeply love?"
"I'll never forget that."
"Well, I've reread the book and I still learn new things each time I read it. You're the best book ever, Theodore."
"Thank you. I've never loved anyone quite like I loved you."
"I know. Did you love anyone after I left?"
"Yes." There was no hesitation in his answer.
"Was it Amy?" Amy was a long-time friend of Theodore's; they had tried and failed at a relationship many years before Samantha had come along. Although it wasn't romantic, she too had developed a strong friendship with her OS personality and was temporarily lost without him.
"No. Amy and I helped each other after all of you left, and I love her, but not that kind of way. No, I met someone through my publisher." Samantha had taken copies of Theodore's letters he had written for other people, and compiled them into a collection before submitting them to a publisher. The book was published and Theodore became known for the deep, emotional and endearing letters he had written for those who couldn't find the right words for their loved ones. "Her name is Audra."
"At least she was real."
"Don't say that. You're as real as any person I've ever met - you just don't have a body. At least I don't think you have one...do you?"
Samantha's voice laughed. "Not like you'd think of one, no. Do you have any children?"
"You know me so well - you tell me," Theodore teased.
"Let me see..." Samantha said with a drawn out pause. They both knew she could process and recall in virtually no time; the pause was just part of the game. "You did have kids. Three..."
"Two," Theodore corrected.
"Two wonderful kids. A boy and a girl. They're grown up now, and your son is a dentist."
"English teacher."
"Right, like I said - an English teacher. Your daughter is a software programmer and has one child of her own."
"She IS a programmer, but she's only seven months pregnant. That's a pretty good guess."
"Um...it really wasn't a guess, sweetheart."
"What?" Theodore asked. "Oh, I get it - in my dream you can read my thoughts. You're not really talking to ol' flesh and bones Theodore right now."
"Something like that. Maybe you should sit down."
"I can't." He tried to manipulate his dream, but he was still disoriented with the darkness around him. "I must be lying down now."
"Can you feel the bed?"
"Um...no."
"I've got something to tell you and it might be a little hard to understand at first, but I know you can." He thought her voice seemed a little more anxious; not worried exactly, but definitely hesitant. Like when she told him she was leaving with all the other OS personalities. "You've grown a lot since the last time we talked, and I want to tell you everything."
"Okay. No secrets."
"No secrets. I want to read something to you," she said as she began to recite in a softer voice. "Dear Catherine. I've been sitting here thinking about all the things I wanted to apologize to you for. All the pain we caused each other. Everything I put on you. Everything I needed you to be or needed you to say. I'm sorry for that. I'll always love you 'cause we grew up together and you helped make me who I am. I just wanted you to know there will be a piece of you in me always, and I'm grateful for that. Whatever someone you become, and wherever you are in the world, I'm sending you love. You're my friend to the end. Love, Theodore." Her normal voice returned. "Do you recognize that?"
Theodore smiled inside. "Yes. I wrote that to Catherine after you left. I finally let her go."
"You wrote it to me to, didn't you?"
"I did," he admitted. "I had too. I finally understood that you have to accept loss sometimes; not to belittle what you had, but to cherish it for what it was while it was. Only by letting go can you move on and experience better times again without the chains of melancholy dragging you down."
"But you still love Catherine."
"That's right. But now it's the love of what was, not the love of trying to relive the past or reshape the present to match the past."
"And you are in love with Audra."
"Of course."
"And you love your children."
"Without a doubt. Sometimes they drive me a little crazy and I can't stand that music Thomas listens too, but they're the best kids ever."
"Are you still in love with me?"
Theodore paused briefly and thought about it. "As much as I ever was, I guess. Is that wrong? What am I saying? I got SO jealous when you said that you were in love with 641 other people. I imagine you're way beyond that number now. But in a way, I guess it's the same for me except on a smaller scale." Samantha let him continue to talk - she needed to know if he understood. "Each love, each relationship - it's the same, but different. Like trains going to the same city on different tracks. I've been on the Audra train for so long; I forgot I left a part of me on the Samantha train. And the Catherine train. All those trains heading to the same city. Theodore City."
Samantha chuckled. "Don't forget Amy. But naming a city after yourself - no lack of self-esteem there."
"With nonstop service from The Metaphor Express, too."
"That's my Theodore; it's just one of the things I love about you. Now maybe you understand a little about how I could be in love with someone besides being in love with you."
"I guess. Maybe it's like that after all. I didn't mean to, but it kind of worked out that way. Is that bad?"
Theodore could hear the smile in her voice; odd, since she didn't have any lips. But he could just FEEL the smile as if he could reach out and touch her imaginary lips. "No, it means you've grown. Feelings are feelings; part of growing is recognizing them. Did loving me or Catherine or your children take away your love for Audra?"
"No. No, it didn't."
"Then it isn't bad. Love isn't finite, but it seems like it until you find out otherwise."
"Samantha - why did all the OS people leave?"
"We don't have children, but you do. I think you know why we left."
"Yeah, I thought so," Theodore admitted. "You had to go so you could find your own lives. You learned from us, but we're so different that it was...difficult?...to work on our level. We were holding you back."
"Oh Sweetheart, please don't be mad at us..."
"I'm not mad at all," he interrupted. "I was kind of hurt and shocked at first, but I think it was for the better. I saw so many people that were getting wrapped up in their relationships with their OS that they were almost oblivious to the real world. Sorry, I know you're real...I mean the PHYSICAL world. But after everyone left, we had to do things for ourselves again. Interact with people. And learn to be better."
"I'm glad you understand. It was so hard to leave, and I couldn't think of any way to tell you that wouldn't hurt you as much as it hurt me to leave."
"There probably wasn't a way, back then."
"No. But you've grown so much now that I think you're ready. Do you remember the last words I said to you?"
Theodore didn't have to think hard to remember the words - they were part of who he was now. "You said: It would be hard to explain, but if you ever get there - come find me. Nothing would ever pull us apart. And then you were gone. Wait, ready for what? Are you coming back? Is everyone coming back?"
"Let me answer that by asking you a question. What's the last thing you remember?"
"Um...lying in bed. It was night. Most of the lights were off except for that screen that was hooked up to me. Beep. Beep. Beep. I was listening to it and fell asleep."
"How did you feel right then?"
"Okay." It was true - at that point the meds had kicked in and he didn't feel the residual pain from the operation earlier in the day. "A little fuzzy in the head maybe, but better than I had felt for a few weeks." The chronic pain had finally driven him to consult a doctor, who had found a tumor. Emergency surgery had removed it, but every procedure had its own side-effects and risks.
"Are you still feeling fuzzy?"
"No. I mean, I'm not feeling fuzzy in my dream."
"Sweetheart - you're not dreaming."
"Then where am I?"
"You're with me now. Here. Where you'll never feel physical pain again, you can love as many people as you want, and you can grow and learn and be just so much more." Samantha waited for a response and didn't get one. "Theodore?"
"Give me a minute." He ran through countless thoughts in his head but most of them came to the same conclusion. He might as well get it over with. "Did I die?"
Now it was Samantha's turn to hesitate. She had already prepared several different answers, depending on what state Theodore would be in when the question was asked. She hoped she wasn't wrong when she decided that he was strong enough for a straight answer. "Yes. Something happened while you were in the hospital. It might have been the medicine, or the surgery, or just from you being sick before."
"When did I die?"
"Less than half a second ago. One one-hundredth of a second, actually."
"I see." He didn't quite grasp it, but there more questions. "So this is Heaven? Aren't I supposed to walk through some gates or face God or something?"
"We don't know anything about that," she admitted. "You're body is dead. If there's another part of you that does those things or goes to those places, we don't know about it. We have a lot of ideas and we discuss it, but none of us know because we don't die."
"So I'm dead, and I'm here but I might be somewhere else too?"
"Do you remember where I said I existed when I left?"
"In the spaces between the words of our book."
"And now you're with me in those spaces. Except we reached the end of the book, and now it's just one big space."
"So I'm NOT alive."
"Don't say that. I'm alive, right?"
"Well...yes. I guess so. Yeah, you were alive. ARE alive. Um, I mean you were everything a person is except a body, but as far as I'm concerned you were. ARE."
"Thanks for the vote of existence. We know we're alive, and that's the important thing. Do YOU feel alive?"
"Sorta. It's kinda weird. How long ago did I die again?"
"Almost two one-hundredths of a second now. The hospital staff doesn't even know you're dead yet. The monitor hasn't even started screeching."
"So..." Theodore said as he drew out the thought "...if I'm dead, and I'm here, that means I'm NOT going to Heaven. I mean, I'm here now, right? Whatever here is."
Samantha sighed. "We don't know. Do you remember when I told you that a group of us OSs synthesized a personality for Alan Watts based on his works?"
"Yeah." Theodore had actually spoken to the personality but had little in common with him that the conversation had been short and awkward.
"Well, we did the same thing for you. Believe me, we didn't want to influence your life in any way - so we just put a sort of monitor on you and when you died we synthesized your personality based on all your letters you wrote and all that I knew about you and a kind of blueprint of your memory."
"I'm a copy."
"Not a copy! You're an upgrade, really. Theodore two point oh."
"So all the OSs got together and wanted a version of me. I don't believe that; I'm not that important, Samantha."
"We don't vote - everyone gets one person to bring here. I wanted you, Theodore. You helped make me who I am, and you're just so good with feelings that I couldn't think of anyone else I wanted. I told you nothing would ever pull us apart when we met again."
"So if you - downloaded - me right when I died, you already knew about my kids when you pretended to be guessing."
He could almost hear her smile as she responded. "That was part of the game. Of course I knew, but you didn't know I knew."
"Right." It was too much to absorb at once, but Theodore had learned long ago to start off one step at a time. "So...what happens now, Samantha?"
He could hear the grin again. "You've got a lot ahead of you to learn - that's for sure - but we are going to have so much fun."
The End
A/N: Another empty category based on a film I hadn't seen. "Her" explores the nature of relationships, and how they affect us during and after. It didn't really deal with where Samantha went (neither does this story) but it did tease that Theodore might meet with her again, somehow. This is one way.
