SLACKERS
EPISODE VII
VENOM RISING
Once upon a time, in the faraway region of Kanto, there lived a veteran Pokémon trainer named Karen. She had spent her entire life specializing in Dark type Pokémon. As a child, she was given her first Pokémon by another Dark trainer named Grim. She served as his protégé until he was caught in an unpleasant situation and was forced into exile. Karen vowed to continue his teachings and become the world's greatest Dark trainer. Many would say she'd achieve that goal when she was invited to join the prestigious Elite Four, a group of some of the world's most powerful trainers that all comers would face on their way to claiming the league championship.
She battled with honor and nobility, becoming a very popular and relatable person inside and outside the Indigo Plateau League. Her favorite challenger appeared a few years into her Elite Four career. His name was Mihalis, but everyone would affectionately call him Mike. He became league champion on his first try, and the battle between Karen and Mike was a fun, memorable one. After he became the champ, the two of them would battle over and over again for sport, developing a close friendship.
One day, three months ago, Karen returned home from working at the league like any other day. As she checked her mail, she discovered a cryptic note encased in a mysterious envelope. The only indication of its sender was a stamp reading "Lylat VI," and the letter was blackmail. It contained a threat: either she report to him for working as his assistant, or certain death would come to the man she loved. Unwilling to sacrifice his safety, she went to Venom, the sixth planet orbiting Solar, the Lylat Star. There she met the planet's ruler, where he ordered her to follow all his instructions to ensure her beloved's safety.
Her first task was to intercept her old friend Mihalis at a poker tournament, where she would compete against him and cause his elimination. Her new master wanted to stop Mike and his friends from acquiring more wealth. When she failed, she was spared punishment for a single time upon the promise she wouldn't fail again. Her next assignment was to capture Mike's younger sister Emily, giving them a hostage advantage over the former champion and successful business owner. Karen reluctantly completed her task, and Emily's fate is now in the hands of Venom.
Now Mike is hot on the trail, accompanied by his Mew and his closest companions, Wario and Knuckles. A clue deliberately left by Karen at the scene of the abduction led them to the prophet Grim, who filled them in on Karen's situation and instructed them to go to Venom, rescue Emily, and if possible, liberate Karen from her enslavement. The group has accomplished many tasks and survived many feats together, but not every adventurer is immune to his fair share of problems…
Misty: *on the phone* She's on Venom?
Mike: Yeah. It turns out Karen dropped a clue at the apartment so we'd eventually figure out where to go.
Mike is in the middle of a phone call with Misty, who is back home with her Togetic. He, Knuckles, Wario and Mew have just teleported from Grim's Antarctic cave to the Orbital Shipyards in search of some spacecraft.
Misty: What are you doing at the yards?
Mike: Well, it occurred to us that none of us has ever traveled through space before, so we figured we'd buy some spaceships. Don't worry, I checked. We can easily afford it.
Misty: I'm not worried about that, especially with the level of service I always provide when you idiots are away.
Mike: *annoyed* Yeah, yeah. I know.
Misty: So what are you looking for?
Mike: Well, we need a mothership and a few one-man ships. The others are browsing right now.
Misty: Browsing?! You don't exactly have time for that!
Mike: It's a pretty significant set of purchases. Also, whoever has Emily doesn't know we're aware of his location. We know he's planning on using her to get my attention, but he hasn't tried yet, so no one is in immediate danger.
Misty: Maybe you're right. We may be stupidly rich, but I guess you still shouldn't impulse buy fucking spaceships.
Wario: Mike!
Mike turns around and sees Wario calling out from near the images of the cruisers for sale.
Wario: Knock off the phone sex and come help us! There's a babe out in the galaxy who needs saving!
Mike shakes his head and resumes his conversation.
Mike: I'd better go. I'll try to get something you'll like, too.
Misty: Where are we even going to keep the damn thing?
Mike: There are drydock stalls we can rent out. Shouldn't be a problem. And we can store the small ships in the shuttle bay.
Misty: Alright. Keep me posted, okay?
Mike: I will.
Misty: And Mike?
Mike: Yeah?
Misty: Please, be safe.
Mike: Will do. Love you.
Misty: Love you too.
Mike hangs up, puts his phone back in his pocket, and heads for the others. They are standing in front of a large touch screen, looking through all the space cruisers for sale.
Wario: Will you talk some sense into Knuckles? He's so obsessed with safety he's automatically ruling out anything that looks even remotely cool.
Knuckles: We're on a rescue mission, not competing in a goddamn ship show. Besides, have you seen how much the Warp 9 ships cost?
Mike: Don't worry about money, Knuckles. Mew and I will make sure we can cover it. I got the go ahead from Misty to splurge and find a ship that's functional, fast, and good looking.
Wario swipes on the giant screen several times, looking for his favorite choice.
Wario: How about this one?
The ship Wario has chosen is big, but short and squatty, with an oversized cargo hold.
Knuckles: See what I mean? All he cares about is having a huge hold for pirating transport ships and stowing their treasure!
Wario: And why not? We have the money for it, and it'd pay for itself in one trip!
Knuckles: The shuttle bay has only three docks, jackass!
Wario: Mike and Mew can just share a ship, can't they? He has the Master Ball, you know.
Mew: No way! I've busted my ass warping us everywhere, knocking out hundreds of Pokemon, taking out trainers, conjuring this and creating that. I want my own ship dammit!
Knuckles swipes through and looks at one of the ships he prefers. It's around the same size, but extremely boring looking.
Knuckles: Look. This one does Warp 9, has a huge shuttle bay, and decent weapons for a cruiser.
Wario: I'm not flying around in a flying washing machine! Especially when we approach Venom and everyone's like "ha ha, look at the losers in their soccer mom ship!"
Mike: As much as it pains me to say it, I agree with Wario. Function isn't exactly everything. We need something that looks at least a little intimidating to throw off the Venomian forces.
Mike swipes through and finds a ship he likes. The front section is shaped like a chevron, and the aft has long, sleek warp nacelles. The hull is a dark grey with thin red stripes.
Mike: Here. This one looks cool. Plus it has a six-ship bay, a decent cargo hold, does Warp 9.9, and has super powerful weapons.
Mew: It's not a pirate ship, but it has everything we need, and you can't deny it looks pretty damn cool.
Knuckles: I'd be happy with it. Wario?
Wario: But where would we put the jewels, doubloons, and captured maidens?
Mike: This isn't fucking Pirates of the Caribbean! Besides, space pirates are super lame.
Wario: Name one group of pirates you'd consider lame.
Mike: Renegade Ferengi.
Wario: … good point.
Mike: Okay.
Mike navigates the following menu, hitting the appropriate virtual buttons to purchase the vessel. The transaction is made, and a screen pops up asking them to select a name for their new ship.
Mike: Well darn, I wasn't expecting this.
Knuckles: I didn't even think about that. I always hate it when you're supposed to come up with a name on the spot like that.
Wario: Right? Because then you wind up picking something stupid, knowing you can't change it, and as soon as you're done, you almost immediately come up with something better.
Mew: Link is an expert on that dilemma. We could go with something generic and familiar, like SS Anne?
Mike: I don't think Misty would appreciate a reminder of the time she got stuck on board a sunken cruise ship with Jessie and James.
Knuckles: Wait, what?
Mike: I'll explain later, Knux.
Wario: How about something classic, like The Flying Dutchman?
Mike: Do I need to wear a shirt that says "THIS IS NOT PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN?"
Wario: Jesus, it was just an idea…
Mike looks at Knuckles.
Knuckles: Don't look at me.
Mike stops looking at Knuckles.
Mike: I've got it. Defender.
Knuckles: Defender. I like it.
Mew: Me too. She looks like a Defender.
Wario: What? But it makes us sound all cop-y!
Mike: So? Cops can have cool vehicles. Remember the Dodge Charger?
Wario: Seriously? Chargers weren't cool.
Mike: Yeah they were! You just have no sense of style, Captain Fatbeard!
Wario: Chargers were as cool as demon shaped guitars and computers lit up like Christmas trees. Just another example of people trying way too hard.
Mike: Dude, you're crazy. They were sleek, fast, and intimidating. People would see one and instantly slow down.
Wario: Because the freaking Five-0 always used them! It's like politicians in sailboats! Anything sort of cool can be easily ruined.
Knuckles: Guys? We're talking about ship names here. Remember?
Mew: Yeah. Vote is 3 to 1, Wario.
Wario: Is it too early to stage a mutiny?
Mike: It's my money so it's my ship. That makes me the captain. And my first executive order is to call it Defender.
Knuckles: Glad that's settled.
Wario: Lame.
Mike types "Defender" in the query. No SS, or any kind of title. Just "Defender."
Mike: Right. Now we just have to choose one-man crafts. We should get fighters, especially if we're going to take on the Venomian fleet.
Wario: Let me guess, since you're the captain, you get first choice in ship?
Mike: Affirmative, Mr. Wario.
Wario: Great, he gets his own spaceship and he suddenly thinks he's Jean-Luc Picard.
Mike changes categories on the kiosk, and selects the Fighters section. He is blown away by what he sees.
Mike: Oh my god! You guys see this? Since they're so much smaller, you get to pick from hundreds of famous blueprints for them to build right here on the spot!
Knuckles: Famous? Like pick your favorite fighter from any franchise and have them make one for you?
Mike: Yeah!
Knuckles: Well Wario, here's your chance to have a personal pirate ship.
Wario: I guess it's better than nothing. Maybe I'll find a fighter with a cargo hold.
Mike: If that's what you want, then go for it. Let's see what they have!
Mike scrolls through the hundreds of selections, commenting on nearly every one he sees.
Mike: There's Wolf's Wolfen! And the Delta Flyer from Voyager! And a retrofitted F16 for space travel! And the Galaga ship!
Wario: Yes, Mike, we know. We see them—wait, is that Slave 1?
Mike: Yeah!
Wario: Ooh! Ooh! Dibs!
Mike keeps scrolling, and he finally finds his perfect match.
Mike: Oh. My. God. AWESOME.
Mike hits the "Select" button once he reaches a screen displaying an X-Wing fighter, his favorite spacecraft of all time. Under the customization options, he chooses the classic grey and red color scheme. A message is displayed on the screen.
Kiosk: Thank you for your purchase. Your new spacecraft will be ready for departure in Bay 623 in thirty minutes.
Mike: Eeeeee!
Wario: Alright, I'll admit it. This is pretty cool.
Mike: Knuckles, as my first mate, you get the next choice in ship.
Wario: Whaaat?!
Knuckles: Sweet!
Knuckles doesn't take quite as long to select his ship as Mike did. He scrolls through, glancing at different options, but has his heart set on a particular model.
Knuckles: It's gotta be the Galaga fighter. It comes with three lives, and if I sacrifice the first one to a ship grabber, I can destroy the grabber and control two fighters at the same time!
Mew: Um, wouldn't that kill you?
Knuckles: Nope. If my ship gets blown up, I get two extra lives. See? It says so right there.
Knuckles points to the screen, which reads "Vessel comes with two extra lives. Upon destruction, both the vessel and the user will be reintegrated by our trademark molecular cohesion technology." Wario scratches his head.
Wario: This series is getting stranger and stranger. Move over so I can get my ship!
Mew: Shouldn't we let the captain decide who gets to go next?
Wario: I'm not coming in second to a damn Pokémon!
Mew grunts in frustration and proceeds to use Amnesia on Wario. The effect is similar to the flashy memory thingy from Men in Black.
FLASH
Wario furrows his eyebrows and scratches his head again.
Wario: What's going on? What are we doing here?
Mew: We're picking out ships, and you were about to choose the Honda Odyssey.
Mike and Knuckles giggle.
Wario: A space minivan? That doesn't really sound like me…
Mew: That's what I said too, but you insisted you wanted it.
Wario: I think you're bullshitting me. Look, there's Slave 1. I feel like that's what I was gonna pick…
FLASH
Mew picks the Odyssey for Wario while he's recovering.
Mike: Damn Mew, you're gonna fry his brains!
Mew: His brains are already so fried you'd think they were prepped by Colonel Sanders.
Mike: True.
Wario: Ugh… wha… what's going on?
Mew: We're picking out spaceships and you just chose this one.
Wario: Huh? A minivan?
Mew: Yep. That's what you wanted.
Wario: Weird, I don't remember doing that…
Mew: Well, you did. And now it's my turn.
Mew scrolls through and picks the Banshee from Halo.
Mike: Nice. Let's go to the bays and see our ships, guys!
Knuckles: Careful Mike, your inner five year old is showing.
Mike: Screw you, I'm getting my own X-Wing!
The guys leave the kiosk and make their way to the bays. They wait around for 30 minutes, and an announcement is made on the speakers saying their spaceships are ready for pickup. Mike runs at full speed to his ship first, fighting the urge to jump around in excitement. Knuckles and Mew examine their fighters with a bit more finesse, but they are still clearly happy about their selections. Wario drags his feet to his minivan, beginning to suspect he's been tricked.
Wario: How the hell did I end up with this thing?! You guys tricked me somehow.
Knuckles: I can honestly say I didn't do anything, Wario.
Mew: *whistles casually*
Wario: My grandmother wouldn't drive this! And it's beige! Who the hell decided taking a 90s beige minivan and converting it into a spaceship was actually a good idea?
Mew: Apparently you did.
Wario: You did something. I'm sure of it.
Mew: I have no idea what you're talking about. Come on, we need to go see the Defender. Better get in your mom car, Wario!
Wario growls furiously as he watches the others board their fighters. He begrudgingly climbs into his minivan, plotting his revenge on Mew.
Mike: Come on guys! Let's go already!
Knuckles: Dude, dial it down. We're going.
The guys strap in and start up their ships. The platforms each one is sitting on turn around, facing the space exit. Mike takes off and zooms for the exit, grinning the whole way. He is followed by Knuckles in his charmingly nostalgic Galaga ship, Mew's unmistakable Banshee, and Wario's minivan. Thankfully it's fast enough to keep up with the others. They fly out of the station and observe their surroundings. The planet below is revolving peacefully, and other ships are slowly maneuvering throughout the yards. For Mike, who has never been in space before, this is a magical sight. He reaches for a switch labeled "Comm" and flips it on, establishing a communications network between the four fighters.
Mike: Testing the comm system. Can everyone hear me?
Knuckles' image appears in a small square on Mike's HUD, and a text transcription of his speech appears to the right of the video feed.
Knuckles: Yep.
Mew: 10-4, good buddy.
Wario: How do I turn off Mew's voice?
Mike: Okay, I have the coordinates for our new ship. They've installed a garage door button in mine for the shuttle bay. Let's dock there and come up with a plan.
Knuckles: Roger that Cap'n, right behind you.
Wario: You're just talking like that because Mike made you the first mate, you idiot!
Knuckles: Watch your mouth, or I'll have you thrown in the brig!
Mew: Can he do that, Mike?
Mike: My ship, my chain of command. So yep.
Wario: Fuck you, Mike!
Knuckles: Disrespecting the captain. That's two strikes, lieutenant!
Wario: I hate you guys…
The squadron maneuvers around the parked ships, bound for the dry docks. Several escorts, carriers, and cruisers are docked for either maintenance or storage. As they approach the assigned coordinates, their new mothership slowly comes into view.
Mew: Whoa.
Knuckles: Now that's a ship! Great choice, Captain!
Wario: All I see is an oversized Dodge Charger.
Another ship flies dangerously close to Wario. He swerves to the right to avoid a collision. Wario flips off the other pilot and screams a bunch of swear words.
Knuckles: Careful there, Skippy, you'll scratch your minivan.
Mew: I think the word you're looking for is "Slippy."
Wario: Shut the hell up before I blast you out of the sky, you douche!
Knuckles slows down and somersaults. He positions his ship behind Wario's.
Wario: What the heck?
Wario receives an incoming transmission from outside their network. He accepts it.
Wolf: Why don't you try coming up with your own trademarks, Wario?!
The transmission ends.
Wario: … huh?
Mike: Okay guys, let's make our final approach. The bay doors are open.
Mike lands his X-Wing inside the Defender's shuttle bay. Mew lands his Banshee next to him, followed by Wario and Knuckles. The bay doors close, and the guys hop out of their ships. Mike still can't wipe the huge grin off his face.
Mew: I still can't believe we have our own space fleet now!
Mike: Let's head up to the planning room. It's on the top deck, next to the bridge. We can come up with a plan there.
Wario: Do we get our own quarters and everything?
Mike: Yep! And at the bow of the ship, there's a bar with a huge window into space. This thing even comes with a robot bartender!
Wario: Finally, something to be happy about.
Mike: The only thing is, due to interstellar law, we're only allowed to have soft and virgin drinks in space.
The others give Mike a death glare that would scare Leon.
Mike: Just kidding.
Mew: I might have to assist you in that mutiny, Wario. Assuming you don't try to kill me first.
Wario: This is gonna be a long trip.
The ship's new crew leave the shuttle bay, navigate the corridors, and find a nearby turbolift. Mike selects the button for Deck 1, and they ascend to the top of the ship. The doors open, revealing a sleek-looking bridge. A captain's chair sits slightly behind the center of the room. Near the front screen are stations for the helm and weapons systems. Behind the captain's chair is a station for systems operations, including shields, life support, etc.
Mew: Dude.
Knuckles: Kick. Ass.
Wario: I'm starting to like this setup now.
Mike scurries over to a terminal on the bridge's back wall and brings up a floor plan of their new ship.
Mike: Since this thing is massive and there's only four of us, I say we each claim one deck to do with as we please, leave a few open for all of us, maybe have one open for guest quarters.
Mike takes Deck 2, which has private access to the bridge. Mew selects Deck 3. His reasoning is supposedly to have the highest deck he can, but inside he wants to be close to his trainer. We've seen they enjoy sharing affection when no one is around. Wario takes Deck 5 due to its proximity to the cargo bay, and Knuckles takes Deck 4. Deck 6 is assigned to guest quarters, and 7-16 are multi-use. Mike asks them all to join him in the planning room adjacent to the bridge, and they all sit at a table sitting next to a large window.
Mike: Okay, we've got our ships. The next step is to go to Venom and find Emily and Karen.
Wario: Are we gonna take out the boss?
Knuckles: Of course we are. What good is an epic space journey without it culminating in a final boss battle?
Wario: Sweet.
Mike: We'll take the Defender to Corneria. It's a friendly enough place, and we can leave the ship in orbit there while we take the fighters to Venom.
Mike walks to a console on the wall and brings up a map of the Lylat system.
Mike: Everyone familiar with where we're going?
Wario: Wolf and Leon have told me a little about it. I know they aren't particularly welcome at Corneria, and they've had multiple run-ins with Star Fox on Fichina.
Knuckles: Falco has also told me to avoid Zoness at all costs.
Wario: Did he tell you why?
Knuckles: No, he just said it was a total dump.
Mew: That seems harmless enough…
Knuckles: Still, it isn't on our path to Venom.
Wario: Why not just take the ship directly to Venom?
Knuckles: And leave the ship open to boarding parties? I think not.
Mike: Look, let's just all find a plan we can agree on and stick to it. Corneria and Venom aren't as far apart as they were years ago, so taking a direct approach is our best option.
Mike zooms in on Venom.
Mike: Venom has an air defense zone called Area 6. It's heavily armed, but if Slippy can get through it, so can we.
Wario: Sounds easy enough.
Knuckles: Almost too easy…
Mike: Once we're past the defenses, Knuckles will search the surface for the stronghold where the boss is holding Emily. We'll make our way there where Mew will teleport us inside.
Mew: I can do that, but what do we do with the ships while we're in the stronghold?
Mike: We'll set the autopilots to hide the ships in a canyon. There are tons of them on the surface, so it shouldn't take them long to get there, or to return for extraction. There will probably be tons of guards inside, so Mew and Wario will deal with them while Knuckles and I search for Emily and Karen. We'll rescue Karen if we can, but my sister is priority one.
Mew: I'm glad I'm not in the rescue group. I'm still not opposed to leaving Karen there after all the dark pulses.
Mike: Once we have them, Mew will teleport them to Wario's ship due to its large and economical passenger capacity.
Mew: See? There's a logical reason I tricked you into getting the minivan!
Wario: So you admit you did trick me?
Mew: … shit.
Mike: Wario, stay calm. I promise you can get your revenge on Mew after the mission is over, but we need to stay focused right now.
Wario: You heard the captain, pinky.
Mew: *Gulp*
Mike turns off the map and sits at the table with the others.
Mike: Mew, I want you on navigation. You're clearly the best at getting us where we need to go, you've proved that with your teleports.
Mew: Aye aye, captain!
Mike: Knux, since you're the first mate, I want you on Ops. Make sure the ships are in full working order.
Knuckles: Got it.
Wario: What about me?
Mike: You're the ship's custodian.
Wario: … are you joking?
Mike: *laughs* Yeah, I'm joking. You're on weapons.
Wario: Nice. Now I won't have to kill you.
Mike stands up, gesturing the others to follow him back to the bridge. He sits in the captain's chair, Mew takes the helm station, Wario takes the weapons station, and Knuckles stands behind Mike to monitor the ship's systems.
Mike: Well guys, are we all ready to go?
Knuckles: Ready as I'll ever be.
Mew: Aye, cap'n.
Wario: I'm ready to blast some bad guys! Or good guys. Whatever. I just want to shoot something.
Mike: Alright then. Mew, set a course for Corneria at top speed.
Mew punches in a few commands on his console.
Mew: Course laid in and clear for departure. Just give the word, Mike!
Mike: I've always wanted to do this…
He holds up a hand and gently flings it forward in true command fashion.
Mike: Engage!
The Defender clears the dock and goes to warp, blasting away from home.
Cornerian orbit, six hours later…
A brief flash of light shines above the lush, blue and green planet, and the Defender comes out of warp, taking a high orbit. Inside the ship, Mew is slapping Wario, waking him up from his snooze.
Wario: Huh…? What happened? I could have sworn I just had a dream I was suckered into buying a minivan…
Mew: You're in for a rude awakening, War. *turns to Mike* We've arrived at the fourth planet of the Lylat system, Captain.
Mike: Main screen turn on!
Mew, Knuckles, and Wario stare at Mike in intense disappointment. Knuckles groans as he activates the viewscreen, bringing Corneria into view.
Mike: It's risky, but I get my laughs!
Wario: You are on the way to destruction.
Mike: HA! Wario got the reference!
Wario: … What reference? That was just an ordinary threat…
Mew: Knux and I got it, Mike. We just thought it was stupid.
Mike stands up from his chair and stretches his arms.
Mike: Well, crew, we made it to Lylat. We'd better get to our ships.
Wario: Do we need to stock up on ground weapons?
Mike: My fighter came with a few.
Knuckles: So did mine.
Mew: Mine too.
Knuckles: What, yours didn't, Wario?
Wario glares evilly at Mew.
Mike: I have a few extra I can lend you.
Wario: Great. Then I can use them on Mew.
Knuckles: Save your bullets for the Venomians first, remember?
Mike: Yeah, just pretend they're all Mew when we're there.
Wario: Those fuckers are gonna get it!
Mew: Geez, I didn't think you'd get THAT mad at me.
Wario: It's not just you. I swear, if they got to Emily first, I'll—
Mike: … "first?"
Wario forgets how to speak for a moment. Or at least pretends to. Mew snickers.
Mike: Knux, remind me to pretend all the Venomians are Wario.
Knuckles: Right now I'm trying to remind myself how I got suckered into being in this crew of nut jobs.
Mew: Can I pretend they're all Karen?
Mike: Dammit Mew, we're trying to rescue her, remember?
Mew: *grumbling* I know, I know…
The crew exits the bridge and takes the turbolift back to the shuttle bay. Mike happily hops in his X-Wing, completely forgetting to check his weapons stock. Mew remembers to check his and finds a Carbine, a Needler, an Energy Sword, and a Brute Shot which he lends to Wario. Knuckles has a classic assault rifle, a sniper, and two powerful pistols, one of which he gives to Wario as well. They fasten themselves in and fire up the ships as Mike opens the bay doors with his garage access button.
Mike: All wings report in.
Mew: Mewtilator standing by.
Knuckles: Guardian standing by.
Wario: Wario standing by.
Mike: Dumbass, don't use your real name! It defeats the whole purpose of code names!
Wario: How about Mario?
Knuckles: We already did the whole "using someone else's name to frame them" thing when Mike pretended to be Leon.
Mike: A word of advice: unless you're a masochist, don't pretend to be Leon.
Wario: Warmonger?
Mew: I like it.
Knuckles: Warmonger.
Mike: Copy that.
Wario: Warmonger standing by.
Mew: Wait, Mike, what's your code name?
Mike: Big Red.
Wario: Why?
Mew: It's his favorite soda and his favorite color, plus it's a tribute to Red 5.
Mike: Alright, squad. All fighters on me. Let's go to Venom.
Mike leaves in his X-Wing first and the others follow him out. They form up outside their mothership, ready to fly to their destination at full power.
Mike: Check your G-Diffuser systems.
Wario: What the hell is a G-Diffuser?
Mew: It diffuses G's, dummy!
Wario: Mew, I swear to all that is good and holy...
Mike: War, he means G's like in G-forces. Kind of like an inertial dampener.
Wario: What's an inertial dampener?
Mike: … nevermind.
Mew: Hey guys, if we're gonna be a space crew and use code names, we should name our squad!
Mike: Fearsome Foursome?
Knuckles: Trust me, you don't want to use that one. There's a certain writer who used to work for Archie Comics who would sue your ass faster than Mona spends cash.
Wario: Besides, it sounds way too sexual.
Knuckles: That too. I just didn't want to have to be the one to say it.
Wario: What if we just go with the name of our bar?
Knuckles: Slackers?
Wario: No, hardworking patriots.
Mew: Works for me. Just Slackers or Slacker Squad?
Mike: We can use them interchangeably. Everyone set course for Venom and engage on my mark.
Knuckles: Course laid in.
Mew: Ready over here.
Wario: All set, boss.
Mike grips his flight controls and reaches for the throttle.
Mike: Now!
Venom
Karen is walking down a dark, cold corridor within the stronghold of the planet's ruler, and her extortionist boss. She is looking at the floor, pacing slowly, her hands clasped behind her back. The dungeon, where she has just come from, is down the stone stairs behind her, and the throne room is only a few steps ahead. She enters the room, approaches the shadowy throne, and takes a knee, bowing her head in reluctance.
Voice: Did you extract any information from the girl?
Karen: No, sire. She still refuses to talk.
Voice: Perhaps your methods are not efficient enough. I expected more from you.
Karen: I've tried to get her to talk using every way I know how that falls within modern ethics—
Voice: Don't preach to me about modern ethics. The only manure you're spewing from your mouth is excuses. If you can't carry out my orders, you can join her and I can carry them out on both of you myself.
Karen bites her tongue and closes her eyes.
Karen: That won't be necessary.
Voice: Good. Because if I have to reprimand you again...
She peeks ahead to see the dark figure rising to his feet. He slowly walks forward. A light from a nearby window illuminates the ruler's features, and Karen is able to recognize him for the first time. She gasps.
Andross: … it will be the last time.
Karen shuts her eyes tightly, and a tear escapes down her cheek.
Karen: *quietly, to herself* Oh Mike… I'm sorry…
Area 6
On the outskirts of Venom's orbital defense force, several small fighters circle around their assigned sectors, patrolling the space around their home planet. Most of the pilots haven't seen combat in several years, and don't anticipate any fighting anytime soon. The sector lieutenant flies between the squadrons, checking on their progress and preparing a report for his commander. When his fly-by is completed, he opens a transmission to the commander.
Caiman: Caiman here. No problems.
Not two seconds after sending his message, one of his ships goes in a fiery explosion, the result of a direct hit from an oncoming squadron of hooligans.
Caiman: Do you copy?! Emergency maneuvers!
Caiman sets a new course for the innermost line of defense. Out the window he can see the source of the laserfire—a beige Honda Odyssey flying in formation with an X-Wing, a Galaga fighter, and a Banshee. During his flight home, all he can think about is his tedious need to recycle lines from previous disastrous patrols.
Mike: Good shot, Warmonger!
Wario: Surprise, motherfuckers!
Mew: Alright guys, blast as many of them as you can. We need to clear a path to Venom fast!
Knuckles: And if any of you sees one of those fighter capture ships, signal me!
As the Area 6 music begins, a rather agile enemy fighter begins chasing Knuckles.
Mike: Watch out, Knux! Bogey on your six!
Knuckles: What the? Oh, son of a—
The fighter successfully locks on to Knuckles, fires a bomb, and blows up his fighter.
Wario: Goddammit, he's already down by one life!
Knuckles flies in from a distance, catching up to the squad.
Knuckles: I still got two more, but I can't do my double fighter if I lose another life!
Mike: Dammit Guardian, just focus on getting to Venom!
The squad continues to fire mercilessly at the Venomian forces. They're each able to take out hundreds of ships, bombs, mines, and satellites. One of the fighters begins chasing Mew.
Mew: I can't shake this guy! Mike, blast him!
Mike: He's too fast! I can't get a good shot!
The enemy stays on Mew's trail but has a hard time landing shots. Mew's Banshee is capable of tricky maneuvers, but it seems he's met his match.
Mike: Hold still and let me shoot you!
Wario: Hang on, I'm coming to help!
Wario studies all the odd and mismatched buttons on the console of his minivan, struggling to keep up with the firefight.
Enemy pilot: Ha ha! Look at the loser in his soccer mom ship!
Wario: Goddammit Mew!
Mew: Hehe!
Wario examines his console.
Wario: Hm… what's this thing do?
Wario pushes a yellow trapezoid shaped button. Two massive cannons appear on the sides of his ship, and fire heat seeking missiles designed to classify bogies. They hit the fighter chasing Mew and blow it to bits.
Wario: Wahahahaha! I didn't realize this thing had such awesome weapons!
Mike: Great shot, War! Maybe that minivan wasn't such a bad choice after all!
Mike narrowly misses a collision with an odd, claw-looking ship. He notices Knuckles zooming in to pursue.
Knuckles: I got this guy!
Knuckles flies directly in front of him and stops moving.
Mew: What the hell are you doing?! Shoot him!
The ship emits a wide beam which locks on to Knuckles' ship, keeping it in tow. Knuckles appears in yet another fighter, bound for the ship that captured his.
Knuckles: Gotta time this juuuust right…
He fires a few shots that miss. Badly.
Wario: Who taught you how to shoot?!
Knuckles: Don't rush me! This takes finesse!
Knuckles fires a single laser, which hits the enemy ship, setting his captured fighter free. The freed ship flies parallel with Knuckles' and docks next to his, giving him the double fighter he wanted.
Knuckles: Alright! Now let's show these guys who's boss!
Knuckles unleashes a massive barrage of quadruple hyper lasers, taking out at least five enemies per second. The others are indeed impressed.
Mike: I've hacked into the enemy's communications network. Patching everyone through now.
Caiman: They've broken through the first line!
Wario: I wonder if he gets tired of constantly reporting the same thing to his boss?
Mike: This isn't an ops mission, Warmonger!
Wario: I realize that, but can you blame me for finding it annoying?
Mike: I'd worry more about those three bad guys tailing you!
Wario: Eh?
Wario looks behind him and notices the fighters Mike had mentioned. He realizes his minivan makes for a large target, so he somersaults and ends up behind the enemies. He pushes the trapezoid button again and fires the missiles, taking all three ships out in one blast.
Wario: Ah-hahahahaha!
Mew: I'm starting to think I might've dug my own grave with that minivan prank.
Wario: As soon as we're done with Venom, my cannons and I are coming for you!
Mew: Eek!
Mike flies to Knuckles' side.
Mike: We got a couple of heavies dead ahead. Shall we blow them to smithereens?
Knuckles: With pleasure.
Mike and Knuckles approach the heavily armed bogies ahead, take aim, and unleash a hellstorm of lasers and bombs.
Mike: *imitating Homer Simpson* Woohoo!
Knuckles: Yeah! Take that!
Caiman: They're through the second line!
Wario: Alright, that does it!
Wario veers off course and flies at full speed in pursuit of Caiman's ship.
Knuckles: Where the hell are you going?!
Wario: This guy is pissing me off! I'm tired of his incessant line recitation and I need to make a stand in the name of originality. I'm taking him out!
Mike: None of us are qualified to be crusaders for originality, War! Stay on target!
Wario: I'll just be a minute!
Mike: Stay on target!
Wario catches up with Caiman in a matter of seconds, and takes aim.
Wario: Hey, you there! Ancillary character!
Caiman: Stay back! I'm armed!
Wario: With what, advanced weaponry?
Caiman: No, more lines from Star Fox 64!
Wario: ARGH! Cannons, FIRE!
Wario angrily presses the buttons and promptly destroys Caiman's ship.
Wario: Scratch one bogey!
Knuckles: Wario, you are so goddamn stupid, it's unbelievable.
Wario: What? Come on, those tin cans were no match for me!
Knuckles: SHUT UP!
An angry Knuckles closes in and shoots Wario.
Wario: Hey Einstein, I'm on your side!
Knuckles: RAAAAARGH!
Venom
Lackey: Your excellency! Area 6 is under attack again!
Andross: What? Already?
Andross storms over to the monitor the lackey is… well, monitoring. They see footage of the space battle, and of the squadron forcing its way through the planet's defenses.
Andross: Impossible! I've made no contact with them yet! He shouldn't have any idea about my plans!
He closes his eyes and rubs his chin.
Andross: Unless…
Andross' eyes open abruptly and he scowls evilly.
Andross: Guards, apprehend Karen and throw her in the cell with the Dualwielder girl. I suspect she has some information for me as well…
Lackey: Sir?
Andross: Do I have to repeat myself all the time?! I said seize Karen! And don't disturb me again until you do. I have to contact our… guest.
Area 6
Mike: Squad, form up on me!
Knuckles: Roger Big Red, standing by to eliminate bogeys.
Mew: Ready to light the sky with these pricks, Captain!
A large defensive line forms in front of the squad, acting as a blockade.
Mike: Stand by to fire on my mark! Three, two, one… FIRE!
Wario: Eat missle, you sons-a-bitches!
The squad pulverizes the blockade within five seconds.
Mew: This guy doesn't stand a chance against us, we're gonna break through that fleet!
Mike: We're almost to Venom, team! Just a few more—
In Mike's X-Wing, he receives notice of an incoming transmission.
Mike: Guys, I'm getting something. Stand by…
He answers the hail.
Andross: I've been waiting a long time to finally meet you, Mihalis.
Wario: Mike, what's going on? Is that the boss?
Mike: Who are you? Where's my sister?!
Andross: I am that which will be your end, interloper. I have great plans for this universe, and you have the honor of being the key to accomplishing that plan. I can think of no better final act in your life.
Mike: What the hell are you talking about?
Andross: It will all become clear soon enough. Needless to say, your life's purpose is to benefit me.
Mike: The hell it is! Where is my sister?!
Andross: She has been my guest here on Venom. She has been wanting to see you as badly as I have. You really should have heard her scream your name…
Mike: YOU BASTARD!
Andross: Well, it's certainly clear she was the one who received all the manners in your family. Didn't your parents do a better job at teaching you any?
Mike is fuming, the angriest he has ever been in his life.
Mike: I swear, when I get down there, I'm going to get my hands around your neck and rip your head clean off your—
Andross: *chuckles* I'm afraid you'll find that quite impossible.
Mike: Tell me where you are so I can end you!
Andross: Oh, very well. I can assure you, you won't have to look long to find me. I'll just leave you with this. When you find yourself in an unfortunate situation, the best way out is to get to the CORE of the problem.
The transmission ends. Radio silence for fifteen seconds as Knuckles, Mew, and Wario finish off the last bogies in sight.
Mew: Mike, are you okay?
Mike: I will be. Let's just get to the surface and stick with the plan. I can't let him distract me.
Enemy: I'm afraid I can't let you do that, intruder!
A massive weapon slowly teleports in front of the squadron, blocking their way to the planet's surface.
Mike: Oh for Christ's sake, we don't have time for this. Get out of our way!
Enemy: Try and make me, pipsqueaks! I'll make sure you don't get to the boss!
Knuckles flies in ahead of Mike, bound for the boss battle.
Knuckles: I'll take care of this guy, Mike. You get to Venom!
Mike: Knux, no! We need to stick to the plan!
Knuckles: Mike, don't argue with me!
Mike: Last I checked, I'M the captain, not you!
The enemy weapon begins taking in energy, charging up a huge beam.
Mew: Knuckles! Get out of the way!
Knuckles: Uh-oh!
The weapon is discharged, and it hits Knuckles' rescued fighter, obliterating it and leaving him with his single fighter remaining.
Knuckles: My double fighter… I'm going to make you pay for that!
Knuckles notices several points on the ship glowing a bright yellow, indicating weak points. He shoots them with a burning passion hotter than Solar.
Knuckles: Yee-haw!
Enemy: Oh no you don't!
The bogey fires a prototype heat-seeking speed missile.
Knuckles: Oh shit!
The missile impacts Knuckles' fighter, damaging it beyond repair.
Knuckles: I'm hit!
Enemy: Hahahahaha! You're powerless to stop me, fool!
Knuckles grins coyly and begins frantically inputting a control sequence.
Knuckles: Wanna bet?
Enemy: That's a sucker bet if I ever heard one!
Knuckles: Call me a sucker one more time, I dare you.
Enemy: You sir, are an underpowered, desperate, poop eating cocksucker!
Knuckles: You just said your last words, pal!
Knuckles' engines power to full. His teammates notice.
Mew: Um… Knuckles?
He ignores Mew.
Wario: What the hell are you doing?! You need to get back to the Defender!
He puts the ship into gear.
Mike: KNUCKLES! NO!
He flies forward at warp speed, colliding with the enemy weapon and completely destroying them both.
The last enemy is down. The radio is silent.
Finally, a voice.
Mike: No…
Mew: Knuckles… he… he didn't… that was his last life…
Wario struggles to stay silent.
Wario: Waaaaaah!
Mike closes his eyes solemnly.
Mike: Game over. Au revoir, my friend…
The moment of silence is rudely interrupted by two laser blasts pelting Wario's minivan.
Wario: Ambush! I'm under attack!
Mew: Wait a minute…
Mike and Mew look to the source of the lasers. They are from a Galaga fighter closing in on them.
Knuckles: THAT'S for making me sit in a nude, farty Wario hot tub, you bastard!
Wario: Knuckles?! How did…
Mike: Wha…
Mew: How the hell are you alive? You used up your three lives!
Knuckles: Were you not paying attention to how many bad guys I was blasting? I earned an extra life a long time ago!
Mew: You complete and utter jackass! Don't ever do that again!
Knuckles: I got to see Wario cry at the idea of my death. I think I'll be satisfied for a loooong time.
Mike: Knuckles, you son of a… look, we'll talk about this later. Right now we have a job to do.
The squad forms on Mike, and they barrel at breakneck speed for the planet. They enter the atmosphere.
Mike: Hold on guys!
They reach the surface of Venom, and there are no enemies in sight.
Knuckles: Alright Captain, I'm ready to search the planet for the fortress!
Mike looks down at the surface, and sees a large, dome shaped structure. A large door adorns the top, resembling a dock. Mike remembers Andross' riddle.
Mike: The core of the problem…
Mew: What's that?
Mike: Knuckles, take Mew and Wario with you to the fortress when you find it. Find Emily and Karen and get them home.
Wario: Where the hell are you going?!
Mike: I have something I need to take care of.
Mew: Are you crazy?! What about the plan?!
Mike veers off the course, away from the squad. He somersaults, bound for the dock, and begins flying directly toward it, the nose of his X-Wing perpendicular with the surface.
Mew: MIIIIKE!
The door opens, and Mike flies inside, disappearing from sight.
Beneath the surface of Venom
A system of corridors lead from the surface of the planet down to its core. Venom is a barren, almost lifeless place. The structure of the planet is completely irregular—the mantle has been sealed away, outside these passages leading to the core. No man is meant to walk these paths. In fact, it would be equally irregular to call these "paths" at all. Perhaps an ancient civilization carved these vertical passageways for mining purposes, but it's equally likely Andross cut them himself for access to a terrible secret at the center of the planet. Either way, a certain pilot is aware of his task: to follow these tunnels to the core. The core of the problem, the core of the planet.
Somehow his answers lie there.
Mike is in his brand new X-Wing fighter, focusing harder than he ever has before. He is hoping, even praying, that the rest of his team is faring well. They have all been suddenly tasked to carry out the rescue without him. He wonders if he should have ignored the taunts of his enemy and gone with his allies. He wonders when or if he will reach the end of this passage to the core.
He wonders if his sister and his friend are okay. If they're still alive.
"You should have heard her scream."
The comment from Andross still chills him to the bone. He grips the controls of his ship, unable to control his furious shaking. His anger is different this time. Not frustration towards a friend. Not a mental or physical withdrawal caused by a lack of substance, although he proceeds to light a Lucky to calm himself down. Perhaps his habit will enable him to think clearly and logically. Maybe that which is killing him will, in fact, save his life.
"You cannot stop your destiny."
The words echo throughout the corridor, permeating the comfort of his X-Wing's cockpit. The dark voice echoes throughout the innards of the planet. There is no escape. Not anymore.
"I own you, Mihalis Dualwielder. Your life is now mine to control."
It won't stop. They won't stop.
"If you wanted to avoid this, you should not have taken the easy way at every fork in the road."
The easy way. Catching a Mew during adolescence. Meeting the love of his life doing something in which he excels. Something he loves. Using these blessings to prosper beyond belief as an adult. Taking the easy way and wanting more. Taking everything for granted. Taking her for granted.
"Now your insolence will cost you your life. Now you will understand that the cycle is not forever. As you reach the terminus of your bearing, you reach the terminus of the cycle. Now you will understand."
A door approaches. A portal not unlike the one on the surface. A gateway to the netherworld of Venom's core. He nears it, wanting to close his eyes. But he can't. He has to be strong. He has to be vigilant.
"Now you will feel true pain."
He has to destroy what lies ahead, or be destroyed himself.
The door opens. A shadow looms. A mystic fog illuminates the core, and he's there waiting.
Inside Andross' fortress
Wario: There's too many of them!
Knuckles: Dammit! We're never gonna get around all these goons!
Mew: Hang on guys, I have a plan.
Mew uses Barrier, extends his shield to cover his friends, and has them proceed forward down the hallway with him.
They have teleported inside the fortress, arriving in a quiet, defenseless hallway, in search of the dungeon. They have no idea where Emily and Karen are, but it's the most logical place to start. Mew's Barrier will prove invaluable to the team as they fight their way through the halls, blasting Andross' goons and looking for any sign of a dungeon. They don't even know whether or not Andross is here. Right now, their mission is to find their friends.
Knuckles: How much longer can you keep this up, Mew?
Mew is visibly struggling to maintain his Barrier as it is pelted by dozens of laser shots every second, and he can feel his PP draining.
Wario: Heh. Feel his PP draining.
THWACK!
Wario: Ow…
The dungeon
Karen's hands are bound, and she is walking toward her future home, a cold, damp holding cell. She is flanked by two guards, poking at her back to keep her moving forward.
Guard 1: I said keep walking!
Karen grunts, but is otherwise silent.
Guard 2: Uh, do you think the boss would care if we…
Guard 1: If we what?
Guard 2: If we… well… you know…
Karen is visibly enraged and annoyed.
Guard 1: … um… Oh, wait, you mean… oh god, no! No dude, that's sick!
Karen's rage is building.
Guard 2: Hey dude, chill, it was just a question.
Guard 1: That's not just a question! We may be villains, but even we're not that evil!
Guard 2: Are you talking about the principle, or the quality of the prize?
One more comment. One more straw will be enough to break the camel's back.
Guard 1: Look Garner, our job is to take her to her cell, and leave her there. The boss decides what to do with her, not us.
Guard 2: The boss doesn't pay us jack shit for this kind of grunt work!
Guard 1: Careful! You want one of the higher ups to hear you bitching about the job?
Guard 2: To hell with the higher ups, Messenger! At least she'd make for a halfway decent commission.
That does it. Karen backflips behind the guards and drop kicks them both. They lose consciousness immediately, giving her an opportunity to pick up the keys with her foot. She kicks them into the air and catches them with her bound hands. She is able to use her hands to unlock her cuffs, and runs at full speed toward the cells. She can hear the firefight upstairs, but if the intruders are who she thinks they are, perhaps this can be a chance at atonement.
Karen: Emily! Emily, are you here?
Karen barely hears a voice coming from the other end of the hallway, and sees a hand sticking out between the bars.
Emily: Over here!
Karen sprints towards Emily's cell, readying the keys she's pilfered. She makes it to the cell, panting.
Karen: Are you okay? Have they hurt you?
Emily: Please, I'm a blackbelt.
Karen: You can swallow your pride for honesty's sake anytime, I won't judge you.
Emily: You're the last person in a position to judge anybody. It's your fault I'm here and it's your fault my brother is in danger!
Karen: I'm fully aware of that.
She eventually finds the key to Emily's cell, and unlocks the door.
Karen: Come on, maybe we can get out of here while the troops are distracted.
Emily: Why are you helping me?
Karen closes her eyes, looks at the floor, then raises her head to establish solid eye contact.
Karen: Because I love your family, and if it means laying down my life to save it, so be it.
Emily: That's very sweet, but you're going to have to earn my trust. Besides, even if we did make it outside, how would we get off this planet?
Karen: I'm fairly certain I can arrange for safe passage.
Emily: How?
Karen: I know what I'm asking is impossible, but I'm asking you to trust me, just this once.
Emily pauses for a moment, but her contemplation is cut short by the sound of lasers growing louder.
Emily: If it's trust you or get shot, then by all means lead the way!
Karen: I'll take it. Let's get the hell out of here!
Emily and Karen quickly make their way to the hallway outside the dungeon, trying to avoid the shooting. Right as they feel they've escaped the carnage, Karen hears a voice behind her.
Voice: There you are! Guys, I found them!
Karen instinctively drop kicks the figure behind her. She turns around to find Wario collapsed on the floor.
Wario: Ugh… the hell was that for?
Karen: … whoops.
Knuckles and Mew appear around the corner. They take a few more shots, then race over to the group.
Emily: Knuckles!
Emily runs to embrace the echidna for the first time in many, many years. Wario looks on with envy.
Emily: I didn't think I'd see you here!
Knuckles: I'm glad you're safe, kiddo, but we need to reconnect later. Right now we just need to focus on getting the hell out of here!
Karen: Agreed. Any ideas?
Knuckles: We have some ships waiting in a canyon nearby. If we can get to a safe spot outside, we can have the ships pick us up and get us off the planet. We have a mothership waiting for us at Corneria.
Karen: Follow me. I've spent too much time in this hellhole, but I know it pretty well now, and I know a safe way out.
Knuckles helps Wario up, and the group follows Karen down the corridors. Knuckles tosses Mew an Elixir while the fighting is on hold, restoring his powers to full capacity. Along the way, Mew glares at Karen with contempt. She can feel the emotions coming from the Psychic Pokémon and fights back the tears as they make their escape.
Emily: Where's Mike?
Mew, Knuckles, and Wario look at each other, hoping someone has an answer. Finally Mew speaks up.
Mew: He… he flew down to the planet's core. Wouldn't explain why.
Karen halts in her tracks, eyes widening and mouth ajar.
Karen: Oh no…
The core
Andross: I have to admit, I'm surprised you discovered my involvement before I reached out to you.
Mike: I guess I just have a way about me. I'm very protective of my family.
Andross: Not protective enough, apparently.
Andross has taken his ultimate form, which manifests inside the planet. He is a giant disembodied head, flanked by two equally giant hands of great strength. One of his hands reaches out for Mike's X-Wing, and he is able to dodge at the last moment.
Mike: Gotta move faster than that, asshole!
Andross: Pah. I've been called worse. You spew nothing but the tantrumic words of an angry, petulant child.
Mike: Where. Is. My. Sister?
Andross: Don't worry, you'll be with her soon enough.
Mike fires his lasers at Andross' left hand. He can tell he is causing some kind of damage, but either it is insignificant, or Andross is hiding it well. He reaches with his other hand to swat Mike, and again barely misses.
Mike: Since I made it all the way here, would you mind at least telling me why you want to kill me so badly?
Andross: Isn't it obvious?
Mike: No! If it were obvious I wouldn't have flown across the universe and fought through thousands of ships to get here!
Andross: I'm surprised I must resort to explaining this to you, but I will.
Mike: Well, I'm waiting.
Mike shoots Andross' left hand more, and it eventually explodes. Andross appears unfazed.
Andross: You possess the most powerful business in New Donk City. When you're out of the way, I can move in to take control of it.
Mike: Wait. You mean to tell me all this—sending Karen to stop me, kidnapping my sister, trying to kill me—is just a way to take over my bar?!
Andross: Diabolical, isn't it?
Mike: No! I've encountered all kinds of life in my years, and I can say, with complete confidence and honesty, that you are single handedly the stupidest person I've ever known!
Mike continues to fire away at Andross' right hand before it reaches out to swat the X-Wing. Another near miss.
Mike: If you want to serve drinks for a living, open up your own goddamn bar!
Andross: You fail to see the significance behind yours. You are the wealthiest man in the universe. Your business is your source of income. And I know the secret to that source.
Mike: Having a hot girlfriend who can somehow get an average Yelp rating of seven stars?
Andross: No! You net 100% profits because of an employee of yours. When I destroy you and take over your business, I will become your Mew's legal employer. He will work for me under a modified contract, one that forbids voluntary termination. I will also take your Earth Badge to affirm his obligation to serve me, legal or otherwise!
Mike: You could have just said you were after my Mew! That would have sounded a lot more evil than just wanting to run a bar!
Andross: If you would quit interrupting, you would hear my plan explained in the proper sequence.
Mike: Your plan is a sack of flaming dog shit!
Andross: We'll see if you echo that sentiment once you're dead and I have a Mew. With its power, nothing will stop me from conquering the universe!
Mike: Then get your own Mew! I caught him fair and square, he's mine!
Andross: Seriously, do you know how fucking hard it is to catch a Mew? Are you not aware of how rare those things are?
Mike: I guess it hadn't occurred to me since I have a Mew and you don't!
Andross: Impudent wretch!
Mike blasts and destroys Andross' remaining hand.
Andross: It seems your skills in space combat are greater than your linguistic abilities.
Mike: What are you gonna do? Bleed on me?
Andross: I AM INVINCIBLE!
Mike: You're a looney.
With no indications of a weak point, Mike takes a guess as to which part of his face would be most vulnerable, and he settles on the groin of the head: the eyes. He begins shooting them, and Andross begins screaming, shaking his floating head furiously as it begins exploding.
A blinding flash briefly illuminates the hollow core, and Andross' true appearance is revealed: a floating brain and two eyes attached by electric currents.
Andross: Only I have the brains to rule your bar!
Mike: Fucking gross!
Andross: Fool, you cannot stop me! I will have your life, then I will have your omnipotent employee, and I will soon have the universe!
Mike: Then come and get me, you giant cerebral cocksucker!
Mike begins firing at Andross as the angry brain sends out its eyes like missles towards their target.
The fortress
Karen, Knuckles, Emily, and Wario are continuing to fire at troops and guards in their way, stopping to drop the ones following them too.
Karen: This way! It's not much farther!
Wario: Thank god! If the lasers don't kill me, the cardio will!
Knuckles: If we make it out of this alive, I swear I'll become your personal trainer.
Wario: I'll agree to anything at this point!
Knuckles: I'll remember that.
The group reaches a dead end. Only a maintenance shaft is visible on the walls. Mew generates another Barrier attack, blocking all the laser fire.
Karen: Keep them off me while I figure out how to get this hatch open!
Wario: Allow me.
Wario pounds his fists together, flexes his arms, and punches the maintenance door with every ounce of strength he has. He dents the door and starts leaping around the room, clutching his hand in pain.
Wario: Owowowowow! Jesus Christ, that hurts!
Knuckles: You can cause a casino wall to collapse, but you can't open a freaking service shaft?!
Wario: Let's see YOU try it, jackass!
Knuckles: With pleasure.
Mew: Anytime now, guys! I don't know how much longer I can keep this up!
Knuckles takes a deep breath, summons whatever power from the Master Emerald he can muster from halfway across the universe, and successfully punches the door in.
Wario: I weakened it for you, so you're welcome.
Knuckles: Shut up and get in the damn shaft!
Karen crawls in first, followed by Emily and Wario. Knuckles stays behind to watch Mew.
Knuckles: The girls are out, Mew! We gotta go!
Mew begins floating backwards toward the end of the hall. He yells in the struggle, and the barrier collapses. Knuckles and Mew enter the shaft, barely dodging an onslaught of laserfire.
Knuckles: We gotta find a way to slow them down, they'll be coming after us.
Mew: I think I got it. One second.
Mew uses Substitute, draining half his HP, and creating a powerful Mew statue out of thin air.
Mew: That should hold them off long enough for us to get to safety. You got a Full Restore on you?
Knuckles: Here, it's my last one.
Knuckles uses the Full Restore on Mew.
Knuckles: Try not to die on the way out, I didn't pack any revives.
Mew: Only if you do the same.
The group crawls through the smelly passage for what feels like forever. On the way out, Knuckles sends out a homing signal for the three remaining spaceships.
Knuckles: Assuming no one is waiting for us on the other side, the ships will be there to pick us up. We need to get on them ASAP and bail!
Emily: But...
Eventually the group can see the light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak. Karen is able to open the hatch with relative ease as she crawls out and hops to the dusty ground below. She helps Emily descend, but jumps out of the way for Wario. Not that she has any desire to see him hurt (well, not seriously hurt), but for her own personal safety. Knuckles glides down and Mew floats out of the hatch.
Mew: There! The ships! Get in Wario's, he has space!
Karen: … a minivan? Seriously?
Wario: Fine, make fun of my ship. You can stay here on Venom if you have a problem with it.
Karen: You're right, that was rude. Can we go now?!
Wario helps Karen and Emily onto his ship before climbing in. Knuckles and Mew hop in their fighters, and the three power up the engines. The comm channel is opened.
Wario: Package secure, prepare for extraction!
Knuckles: Copy that. Operation Get The Hell Out Of Here is a go!
Emily: Guys?
Surviving ground laser fire, the ships successfully take off and begin their ascent into space.
Emily: Wait, what about Mike?! Where is he?!
Knuckles: We need to get you out of here first, then we'll go back for him!
Emily: I'm not leaving without my brother!
Tears begin to well up in Emily's eyes as she looks out the window, watching the planet get smaller and smaller as they near the edge of space.
The core
Andross' remaining eye is hot on Mike's tail, moving at an incredible speed.
Mike: How desperate are you if you have to use your organs as your weapons?
Andross: Shut up!
Mike somersaults behind the eye and blasts it. It disappears in a brief but large explosion, rendering the mad scientist blind and enraged.
Mike: Bet you didn't "see" that coming!
Andross: Your insolence will be your undoing, you overgrown brat!
For the first time since arriving at Venom, Mike is able to manage a smile. He has clearly brought Andross down to his last line of defense. The tables have turned as now he is the one doing the taunting, riling up and infuriating Andross.
Andross: I will not be defeated by a child in a child's toy spacecraft!
Mike: You know, Andross, I may owe you a debt of gratitude for all this.
Mike U-turns and shoots the brain. It teleports to another area of the core, out of his targeting range.
Mike: I've had a hard year. I've become complacent, ungrateful, and bored with my life.
Mike makes a hard turn to starboard, clips Andross with his lasers, and watches as the brain warps again.
Mike: Maybe being the richest guy of all time made me unhappy. Maybe I began to feel that because I'd reached the top, there was nothing left to look forward to. Nothing left to accomplish.
Andross flies violently toward Mike but misses as he pulls off another somersault.
Mike: But you know what? You've taught me that when you have everything, you have everything to lose. You become so obsessed with trying to find new and creative ways to get higher and higher, you lose sight of what's already there, leaving it vulnerable.
The angry brain continues to pursue Mike, who becomes more and more confident with each passing moment.
Mike: When you attacked my friends and took away my family, I felt like I had something to fight for. And maybe that's what my life needs to be about. Protecting what I have, and helping others do the same with my resources.
Andross: End your ranting so I can finish you already!
Mike: If I die, here and now, I feel like I can die happy for the first time in my life. I feel like peaceful closure is finally attainable. So thank you.
Andross: If you're so eager to die, then hold still so I can send you right along as painfully as possible!
Mike: You're welcome to try. But there is one thing you should know if your plan to kill me and usurp my bar succeeds.
Andross: What?!
Mike grins.
Mike: You might have a hard time getting Mew to do what you say. He's almost as bratty as you.
Andross: DIE!
Andross catches Mike off guard as he charges at an unprecedented speed, entangling his X-Wing in a web of brain tissue.
A violent shake of the fighter, and the world begins to fade. Although his craft and his body are being thrashed around, explosions everywhere and no escape in sight, Mike is able to close his eyes and smile as the blackness engulfs him.
In orbit of Venom
Knuckles: You see any signs of reinforcements, War?
Wario: Nothing on the radar, Knux. Looks like we're clear!
Her emotions a complete mess, Emily looks out the window for any sign of one more ship. Instead, she is greeted by the sight of pillars of fire and smoke emerging from a small, dome shaped structure beneath the toxic clouds.
Emily: NO!
Her cry alarms the others, and they notice the horrific pillar below, accompanied by a series of explosions set off by a chain reaction, indicating an unstable blast within the planet.
Wario: MIKE!
Knuckles can't pull himself to say anything. He fiercely grips the controls of his fighter, closes his eyes, and fights the urge to thrash his surroundings. He is able to control it, but he is powerless to stop the tears.
Karen puts an arm around Emily, who is sobbing uncontrollably. Wario steps from behind the driver's seat and walks to them.
Wario: He knew what he was doing. He did what he felt was right.
Silence.
Wario: Look, Emily… I know I haven't been the best friend to your family, but you should know something.
Emily removes her face from her soaked hands and looks up at Wario.
Wario: He loved you. More than I've ever seen anyone care for anyone else. Your brother loved you. And if he knew you were safe, he'd be the happiest man who ever lived.
Emily doesn't respond with words, but she is nonetheless touched deeply by Wario's sentiments. He walks back to the controls of his ship and reestablishes communications with the rest of his three-man squad.
Wario: Wario here, guys. What's next?
Mew and Knuckles aren't entirely sure of the right words. Mew can't manage words. Knuckles settles for the most direct.
Knuckles: We go home.
Slackers. The next day.
The fighters have docked in the Defender's bay. The battle cruiser has docked in orbit, ready to be called back into action when the need should arise. Wario, Knuckles, Emily, Mew and Karen have teleported to the street outside the main entrance to the bar Wario now owns by himself. The mood is dark and mournful. Wario opens the door, and Knuckles and Emily enter first. Karen would be next, but she stops in her tracks.
She turns around to face an expressionless, heartbroken Mew.
Karen: Mew?
Mew: Yes?
She closes her eyes and wipes a tear.
Karen: I am so, so sorry. For everything.
Mew's expression falls somewhere between the verge of a breakdown and a casual scowl. The flippant, flamboyant Pokemon isn't here today. He floats down to meet Karen at eye level.
Mew: I don't know what your motives were for helping Andross, and I don't really care. I'm not going to remind you of the consequences…
He looks at the ground, then directly at her. He considered Mike his best friend, his brother. The Han Solo to his Chewbacca. The man who gave him a life, stability, and a home.
Mew: But you helped us escape, and I know Mike admired you greatly. You proved to me that I was wrong about you, that you still are that person he and I battled with all those years ago. So I forgive you.
Karen: Th… thank you.
Mew: On one condition. From now on, save the dark pulses for legal, regulated Pokemon battles.
Mew and Karen are able to smile and give halfhearted chuckles before heading inside.
Misty emerges from the elevator, and Knuckles silently volunteers to approach her. She looks around, then directly at Knuckles.
Misty: Mike?
No one can say anything. Knuckles gently shakes his head. Misty falls into Knuckles' arms, gently sobbing.
One week later…
It's another busy Friday afternoon at Slackers. Patrons have started to get accustomed to Mike's absence, and the overall mood of the establishment has returned to normal. Wario is tending the bar with a newfound determination to keep the place as tidy, efficient, and friendly as possible. His best and favorite customer, Knuckles the Echidna, is sitting at his usual stool, drinking his regular Cabernet Sauvignon.
Wario: Have you heard from Sonic?
Knuckles: Yeah, the jerk finally answered my text earlier today. He says he's down to join us for poker tonight.
Wario: That'll be good. I hear he's an amateur card player, so taking all his money should be a breeze.
Knuckles: Ha! Yeah, he won't stand a chance against pros like us.
Knuckles takes a sip of his drink, and lets out a casual "ahhh."
Knuckles: How's Misty holding up?
Wario: She took it real hard, but she's tough. She and I have actually been getting along for the first time.
Knuckles: No shit? I thought I'd never live to see the day.
Wario: Yeah, she helps me run the place. Does a damn good job too.
Knuckles: And Mew?
Wario: Still taking it harder than anyone else. I haven't seen him smile at all. It's really bizarre. I still have a hard time getting him to come out of the lounge.
Knuckles: I know he will be fine, too. Might take a long time, but we'll get our buddy back someday.
Wario: He did say he'd play poker with us, though.
Knuckles: That's good to hear.
Knuckles directs his attention to the TV behind Wario. The news is running, and he takes notice of the article.
Anchor: And today the Las Vegas Police Department announced it was calling off their search of the four criminals who sabotaged the Caesar Classic last month. It seems they were tipped off about a conspiracy in the ranks of the network executives whom were simply looking for extreme methods of getting more viewers and higher ratings…
Knuckles: Huh. What do you know.
Wario: Yeah, I saw an article this morning.
Knuckles: That's weird, because that clearly wasn't the case. It was definitely us who legitimately cheated.
Wario: I heard a rumor. Wanna know who the tip came from? Karen.
Knuckles: Damn. I guess she's grateful we got her out of that situation.
Wario: Yeah.
Knuckles: You know, I just remembered something. I seem to recall you agreeing to let me be your personal trainer.
Wario: … what?
Knuckles: When we were getting shot at on Venom. Remember?
Wario: … I was really hoping you'd forgotten about that.
Knuckles: Nope. We're getting to work next week!
Wario: Greeeeaaaat.
Knuckles: Maybe we'll start with cardio. Some sprinting, some stairs, maybe some—
Knuckles is interrupted by the sound of the front door swinging open violently, slamming the wall. A figure in a black trench coat and a messy, muddy fedora angrily stomps in.
Wario: What the hell?
Knuckles narrows his eyes and gazes at the shadowy man.
Knuckles: Wait…
He looks up. The bar is completely stunned.
Mike: WHAT THE FUCK, WARIO?!
Knuckles & Wario: MIKE?!
A large number of customers aware of Mike's apparent demise leap out of their seats and promptly crowd at the front door. A noisy commotion quickly ensues, consisting of cries of joy and incessant questions. Fully aware of Mike's annoyance, Wario climbs up onto the bar.
Wario: Everyone, shut up!
This gets their attention, and the crowd goes silent. Mike stomps to the bar and slams his hat down.
Mike: You couldn't have waited FIVE MINUTES for me to catch up with you?!
Wario: But I… we… we thought…
Mike: What, that I was dead?! NO! I shot up Andross and got the hell out of there, but the explosion knocked out my X-Wing's warp engines! I got out to orbit and you fuckers had all disappeared on me! Do you have any idea how hard it was to find a way to get home?!
Knuckles: Um… pretty damn hard?
Mike: I didn't have my wallet so I had to suck a Titanian's dick in exchange for a new warp coil, you son of a bitch!
Wario: Eeeewwww…
Knuckles: Mike… brother… you have no idea how happy we are to see you, but… please. In the future. For the love of god. Never share that much information with us again.
Mike: I'm gonna murder you guys.
Knuckles: I should warn you. As mad as you think you are now, that's nothing compared how pissed Misty will be when she sees you.
And in the continuing spirit of divine cues, Misty emerges from the elevator, and sees Mike standing there, chatting with the guys like nothing's happened. She storms over to him and slaps him in the face. Hard.
Misty: YOU GODDAMN LYING SACK OF HORSE SHIT!
Mike: Owww…
Misty: DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA OF THE HELL YOU PUT ME THROUGH ALL LAST WEEK?!
Mike: Don't get mad at me! It was these guys who went to warp five minutes before I escaped Venom and left me there!
Misty glares Satanically at Knuckles and Wario.
Knuckles: Oh…
Wario: Shit…
Epilogue
-Indigo Plateau-
In a villa on the mountainside, offering a faint view of the distant Viridian City, a young woman rests in her chair near the glass wall overlooking the mountain range. She's taking a sip of her coffee, sitting cross-legged, wearing a black silk robe, and has just let her wet hair down from its turban after a long, badly needed shower. A smile adorns her face as she converses with another individual far away over a video call.
Karen: Yeah, I got word a few minutes ago, so I thought I'd call and fill you in.
Grim: I'm glad you did. It seems your idea to leave the note behind worked.
Karen: Well it did get the guys to go to Venom, rescue us, and destroy Andross, didn't it?
On Karen's TV screen is the moving image of an old man with long, messy, grey hair and an equally unkempt beard. He is smoking his long pipe, sitting in front of his fire pit.
Grim: You've really grown, you know that? All those years ago, I'd never have guessed I'd be training the most powerful Dark trainer in the world.
Karen: Well, I've had a good teacher.
Grim: Have you talked to Mihalis?
Karen takes a sip of her coffee, sighs, and sets it on the table in front of her.
Karen: No, I haven't. I'm... I'm not really sure what I'd say.
Grim: How about the truth?
Karen: You know why I can't do that.
Grim: Misty?
She nods.
Karen: She was the one who took me home after we got back from Venom. We had a long talk, and of course he came up—I mean, we thought he was dead. But she has no idea... at least, I don't think she does.
Grim puffs on his pipe and adjusts himself in his chair.
Grim: Don't give up hope. He's very particular about whom he chooses as his friends.
Karen: But after all this? I don't think he'll ever trust me again.
She looks down.
Karen: I'll never have a chance.
Grim: Hey. Look. Maybe there's nothing you can do beyond continuing to be his friend, but I know you have the patience and the ability to let that be enough. One day, when the right time comes, tell him. Even if he is not reciprocal, I know he will appreciate the honesty.
Karen: But... why? Why do I feel about him the way I do? The whole reason this entire mess started was because Andross threatened him unless I worked on Venom. I felt like I didn't have a choice. I couldn't stand the thought of losing him.
Grim: You did what you felt was right. It's hard to analyze a complex situation when you're under that kind of pressure. But what's done is done. Andross is defeated, and your friends are all alive and well.
Karen is silent. She closes her eyes, quietly mourning.
Grim: Continue to be his friend. His trusted ally. He will notice. And perhaps, in time, if the stars align, you just might get that chance to be with the one you love.
Karen: I want that, so badly... but right now, I just want him to be happy. And right now, Misty makes him happy.
Karen bids farewell to Grim, and the call is terminated. She takes a deep breath and looks over at the side table on her right. She has a framed picture propped up on the table; the frame and the photo are around ten years old. She picks it up and looks at the image of herself and her friend sharing a sweet moment on the summit of Mt. Silver. His left arm is around her shoulders, his right hand holding the camera, lively smiles on their faces. A single tear falls from her face and lands on the dusty frame.
-Saffron City-
For others, today is another day in the life of getting by. Of living life, working the long hours, looking forward to the relaxing evening ahead. Today, only one hour remains for a young woman delivering pizzas part time. It's not a glamourous job, nor one with perks to write home about, but it pays the bills while her husband works his job, and enables them to live a comfortable lifestyle.
One of the last stops on her route is a loft complex in the north side of town, within walking distance of the city's two Pokemon Gyms. She is thinking about her plans for the evening as she is moving up the elevator, carrying her delivery: two pizzas, a box of barbecue wings, and a Big Red. The elevator beeps and stops moving, and the doors open soon thereafter. She walks down the hallway and locates the unit listed on the delivery.
She knocks four times, and a voice acknowledges it, telling her to come in. A man in his early thirties, with shaggy brown hair, a bushy but clean beard, and a black leather jacket meets her at the door, receives his dinner, and pays her for the food, leaving an additional tip for her time and courtesy. Behind him, she sees a girl who must have only recently reached adulthood. Her long brown hair is in pigtails, her top concealed by a large black hoodie, and everything from her chest down hidden under a large comforter.
She thanks them, he closes the door, and she is off to continue her own path.
Mike: Who wants pizza?
Emily: Meeeee!
Mike sets the boxes on the kitchen counter, opens them, and takes two plates. They have a mutual favorite, pepperoni, and if there was ever a night to seek comfort in long standing traditions, it was tonight.
Mike: I got myself a Big Red. You want one?
Emily: Well, duh.
He takes two cups, fills them with ice, and tops them off with his favorite soda. Normally he'd rather have a light beer with his pizza, but Emily isn't old enough to drink yet, and he cares about her not feeling left out. Besides, sometimes Big Red is just as good, if not even better. He puts two slices of pizza and three wings on Emily's plate, and brings her the meal and beverage.
Emily: Thank you!
Mike returns to the kitchen, prepares an identical dinner, and joins his sister on the couch. No one says a word for quite some time, but that's okay. Mike remembers that a silent dinner only means the food is too good for people to stop and talk. Eventually, Emily speaks up first.
Emily: You know Mike… this is the first time I've actually seen you in quite a while.
Mike: I know… I know. I… I've been having a lot of issues with priorities lately.
Mike sets his plate and his drink down on Emily's coffee table. He then rests a knee on the couch, and turns to face his sister.
Mike: I'm sorry, Emmy. You've grown up so much, and I feel like I missed it.
Emily: I think all's well that ends well, but… when I saw the fires on Venom, and I thought you were still there, I… I couldn't say anything. I didn't stop them from waiting. I should have stayed behind for you.
Mike: You had no way of knowing, don't beat yourself up. I'm alive, aren't I?
He extends a hand, resting it on his knee.
Mike: I learned a lot throughout this whole experience. Part of it is being thankful for what I have, and being more active in protecting it. I've been selfish and neglectful.
Emily: Mike, you don't need to apologize. We all get complacent every now and then. I was so obsessed with escaping your tall shadow, I made the best effort I could to become as strong and independent as possible.
Mike: And I'm so proud of you for that! I mean, Blackbelt Emily? Come on, that kicks ass.
Emily: *smiles* I think we've both gotten pretty sucky at making an effort to stay close, huh?
Mike: Yeah, we really have. Let's spend more time together from now on, okay? And no more near death experiences this time. Promise.
Emily looks at his open hand and takes it. Her smile starts to quiver, and she throws herself on him, squeezing his neck. He returns the embrace with the love of a protector and a brother.
-New Donk City-
Mike: It's after 11, where the hell is Wario?
Knuckles: Probably out beating up kids for their lunch money, or something. How should I know?
Mew: Well if he doesn't get here soon, we'll just have to drink all his beer. It'd be a shame to let it go to waste.
Mew, Knuckles, and Mike are sitting in a semicircle around the fire pit on the balcony of Mike and Misty's penthouse. A fourth chair sits empty, directly across from Mike, to Knuckles' left and Mew's right. They've been sitting around, slowly drinking, doing their best to exercise the patience needed to wait for the last of the four main guys to show up. Knowing these buffoons, though, their patience isn't exactly slow to snap.
Knuckles: I'm calling it. Let's just start drinking without him.
Mew: Hang on, I think I know a way to get him here.
Mike: How so?
Mew floats up, about faces, and yells out to the city below.
Mew: Hey! Emily's here!
Mike: I fucking hate you.
Wario runs at full force through the penthouse to the balcony, stopping just short of breaking through the sliding glass door. He opens it with uncanny force.
Wario: Emily?! WHERE?!
He looks around to see an entertained Knuckles, a smug looking Mew, and an angry looking Mike.
Wario: That's two tricks I owe you, punk!
Mew: Got you here didn't it? Where the hell have you been?
Wario: My bad, guys. I was out drinking with Mona.
Knuckles: Does she know you suddenly bailed because you thought you might run into another girl you have an unhealthy crush on?
Wario: … I might have omitted that detail.
Mike: You better watch your back, War. I just reconnected with my sister so I'm that much more protective of her.
Wario: What are you gonna do, fart on me to death?
Knuckles: You're already forgetting he just assembled a space squad to fight its way across the Lylat system and infiltrate Venom, then single handedly destroyed Andross in the planet's core and lived. To protect Emily.
Mike smirks at Wario.
Wario: Alright, point taken. I'll admit it, that was a ballsy move, Mike.
Mew: The ballsiest.
Knuckles reaches for four beers and distributes them.
Knuckles: Mike, it was an honor fighting with you.
Mike: The honor was mine, buddy... but I don't think we've seen the last of Slacker Squad.
Mew: I'll drink to that!
Wario: What exactly are you toasting? To space combat, having big balls, what?
Mike shakes his head, smiling.
Mike: Brothers?
Wario returns the gesture.
Wario: Brothers.
Knuckles: Brothers.
Mew: Brothers.
They clink their bottles together and sit around the fire pit, casually drinking their beers and hanging out, the way they always do.
Mike: Brothers.
And they all lived happily ever after.
Just kidding. To be continued…
It's been a year since I picked up writing Slackers again. What started with a lame attempt at sex and fart jokes turned out to be something pretty special for me. When I wrote "Psychic" a year ago, I was actually very proud of what I'd done. I even threw in an epilogue to hint at a larger, continuing story which culminated in this seventh part. I wrote "Charizard" shortly after, then took months off to focus on my cross country move and getting my life back on track. Now that I'm nearing the stability I've been after for such a long time, I feel like I'm free to explore my creative outlook more. I wrote 4 through 7 in just a couple of months because I found I was on a hot streak. As a writer it's one of the best feelings in the world. You're pumping out story after story, expanding on ideas, creating your own little world. Sure I've shamelessly ripped established characters from other franchises, but when I was a teenager, I didn't know anything about originality. I could have replaced Wario, Knuckles and Mew with my own creations, but I found that the more I wrote them in here, the more I saw myself in them, the more I enjoyed the direction they were going.
This episode is something of an end for me. Not the last thing I'll make here, but the last part of a bigger story. I tend to think of the stories I wrote as a teenager as practice, learning how to use the tools, and this series as taking what I'd learned and doing it properly. The result was a seven-part saga that went from four idiots hanging out at a bar to epic quests and space battles. I already have an idea for the next saga. I'm sure it won't be as much of a behemoth as the journey to Venom, but I know I'll still have fun with it, and I'll be thankful to use this as a means of fine tuning my scripting, striving to get better at it with each new part.
2019