Morning everyone!
I'm setting up to make myself a cup of coffee and posting, let yall get back to your normal morning routines. Tis the season, so I'd recommend a nice cup of tea while you read, like Moroccan Mint or Jasmine Pearl. (Or Coffee of course.) I did all the edits last night, and am gearing up to post, fix my hair and then *ahem* *deep breath*
THROW ON MY JERSEY BECAUSE ITS GAME DAY YALL! THE CHIEFS WILL PREVAIL.
…So, I like football. Quite a lot. And this is a day I'm greatly looking forward to. Aside from my obsession with the sport, this is also a rather important chapter so I won't blather on too much. Thanks for being here and let me know your thoughts!
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Levi gave a single nod to Eld in acknowledgement, but soon turned his gaze back to Petra, watching as she ran off toward Oluo. He gave one last amused shake of his head and prepared to walk over toward Eld and begin their first match, but he instead remained in place as he watched Petra give a wave to Oluo and in the next moment, suddenly pull her shirt up over her head, removing it completely and leaving her clad in only her tight black shorts and matching sports bra.
She threw her previous tank top to the ground and moved closer to Oluo, rolling her shoulders and neck in preparation.
Levi blinked and felt his breath leave him as his eyes trailed over her form, because he certainly hadn't been expecting that, and he watched with a sort of indignance as Oluo's eyebrows also raised as he watched Petra with a similar surprised expression that Levi was certain, mirrored his own.
A scowl was instantly at his lips and he crossed his arms in immediate frustration. She had worked out in that exact same outfit a number of times before, and each time he had always hated it. He couldn't tell her to cover up because by all accounts, it was well within regulation for her to wear whatever she wanted during training that intentionally neglected use of the 3DM gear – so as her Captain he wasn't able to do anything because it didn't technically break any rules.
Yet even still, he had always wanted to say something because it was…distracting.
The team's productivity always went down as a direct result and worse still, Petra was completely unaware of the raw sexual magnetism she carried, and how it was only intensified when she dressed like that. It always became this intricate sort of balancing act in attempts to keep his team in check without making her aware as to why he needed to safeguard her in the first place. He feared that if she did understand the nature of their stares and sudden desire they shared to be close to her, it might make her feel uncomfortable with her place in a squad of men and Levi worked tirelessly to ensure that Petra trusted them all implicitly and felt like she belonged, even if days like this…tested those boundaries significantly and reminded them all that Petra was a very attractive woman.
On days like this, the men would watch her just a moment longer than usual - they enjoyed teasing her about her pale skin, make wise cracks about how it must be getting close to summer if Petra was working out in that again – even if the behavior wasn't always wandering glances or his team treating her as a mere object, no one could deny the difference in behavior that occurred as a direct result from her more revealing outfit.
Levi would have marveled at the impact she had on his team, if it weren't for the fact that she ran him ragged with all the necessary damage control.
Everyone wanted to be close to her. Everyone wanted to make her laugh. Everyone wanted to be the one to nudge her shoulder or muss her hair – Levi supposed that if she worked out more consistently in such attire, they would get used to it eventually and wouldn't think much of it, but due to the fact that it was maybe only a handful of times each year when the days were hot like this, it was always noticeable and a considerably big deal to see Petra in less than her normal choice of wardrobe. Try as he may to keep on top of it, it was a full-time job in and of itself and what was more…
It was exhausting on a new level, because unlike before…now he wanted her too.
Levi scowled and cursed his luck, because of course today would be one of those days. Had he known that was what Petra had intended changing into, he wouldn't have let her change at all and spared himself the mental frustration of trying to keep himself, and the team focused on their training and not focused on her eye-catching and considerably appealing physique on clear display.
Levi mumbled a few choice words to himself as he watched her, somewhat jolting when Eld appeared beside him, having been that distracted by his own previous thoughts that he hadn't even noticed the blonde's approach beside him.
Eld hadn't missed how the Captain had gone from smiling to scowling in a mere two seconds flat and curiously followed his line of sight to see what it was that had changed his mood so suddenly. When Eld's sights scanned across the arena and settled onto Petra and her apparent change of wardrobe, he furrowed his eyebrows as he realized the nature of his superior's irritation.
Eld cleared his throat, and nodded toward Petra casually, "See something you like, Captain?"
Levi shook his head darkly and turned back toward the open ground for their match with a menacing scowl, "No."
And that was the honest truth.
He didn't see anything he liked, because he did not like seeing Petra being stared at by Oluo. He did not like seeing Petra laughing and talking to him so casually, unaware of the potent effect she had on her teammate or the nature of his stare. For that matter, he did not like being reminded of the potent effect she had on him personally. All at once he was unwittingly reminded of the way she had looked that night with her lined green eyes and full red lips, and what was more, the way those lips had felt when pressed up against his.
The longer he watched her, he found that he wanted her to come back because she was so far away from him and Oluo was looking her up and down and the unsettling combination was putting him on edge fast. He wanted to be the one to tease her about her inability to handle the heat, to be the one that watched her as she twisted her body in combat, her lithe and shapely legs moving beneath her as she all but danced in front of him, a challenging smirk in her eye because even though he was heavily favored to win, his record to date being flawless against her, she would never just hand him the victory.
He found that more than a mere sparring match, he wanted to get a rise out of her – create a false opening that would only lead to her being pinned in his hold, lead to her green eyes widening and a gasp drawing from her lungs when she realized all too late that it had been mere baiting. He would grip her wrists tightly, feel her chest press against him as she tried to catch her breath, and he would watch in satisfaction as blood rushed to her face as he confirmed that she'd have to knock him on his ass some other time, because she clearly needed more instruction.
Levi exhaled sharply and forced his mind to clear, because it wasn't him, it was someone else, and it wasn't his place to say anything about it because again, no one was technically doing anything wrong. He turned his back on the sparring pair across the training grounds, tried not to think about Petra and her adjusted wardrobe, and exhaled lowly, patience thin for reasons that he wasn't prepared to address just yet.
But even still.
Fuck.
Eld followed behind the brooding Captain in silence and they each took up a fighting stance, Levi giving a single nod and both springing into action at once.
"You know Captain," Eld began as he blocked with one arm and attacked with the other, "This actually works in my favor because I've actually been wanting to talk to you."
Levi moved around him quickly, swinging his leg out and pivoting back up into a full standing position as he dodged Eld's forward jab. He said nothing to his statement, knowing that Eld of all people did not need the encouragement to keep speaking, and as expected, Eld continued just the same.
"What's going on between you and Petra?"
Levi rolled his eyes and initiated an attack of his own, speaking with a strained voice as he kicked his leg out again and successfully managed to kick Eld back a few feet, "Nothing."
Eld gave a slight groan and stood up more fully as he found his footing again, both of them walking in a slight circle as they tested each other and tried to bait a premature attack from the other. Eld gave a fake smile and clicked his tongue, "Okay, fine. If that's how you want it, then let me rephrase my question. Why did you kiss Petra after the party?"
Levi was admittedly surprised because he hadn't known that Petra had talked to Eld about it – although now that he thought about it, he really should have known considering how close the two of them had always been - and it was at that moment that Eld lunged forward aggressively, the fight continuing all the more as Levi brought his arms up to block at the last moment. Reading his perturbed expression and last-minute block, Eld gave a smirk at the Captain's surprise, "That's right, she told me. You'd do well to remember that you're not Petra's only friend; I'll have you know she tells me a lot of interesting things. For example lover boy, I hear it from a good source that you're an excellent kisser. I must say, I'm so proud. Didn't know you had it in you."
Levi's eyes narrowed, "Piss off, Eld."
Eld's teasing expression fell suddenly cold and he looked at him seriously as he ducked below Levi's elbow, "Oh but I'm not even close to finished Levi, because Petra is pretty heartbroken right now and I don't like seeing my comrade's emotions being toyed with."
Levi turned in the same forward motion and swung his other elbow aggressively toward Eld, moving lower to the ground and thrusting his palm upward toward his chin. Eld grabbed the Captain's wrist and turned his momentum against him, stepping out of the way as he tossed the Captain behind him smoothly.
Levi moved the few steps in attempts not to fall and corrected himself upward, and again they were back at a sweeping sort of distance, each circling each other warily.
Eld watched Levi with a dark expression, "You see what I find most interesting is the fact that Petra is pretty convinced you rejected her, but-"
As Eld spoke, Levi's attention flitted across the field, a sort of guilt coming to him at hearing Eld's words. He had hoped that maybe Petra wouldn't have taken it like that and figured that there was more she hadn't initially noticed, but hearing it from Eld was almost as good as hearing it from Petra herself and merely confirmed that she had chosen to blame herself after all.
Levi watched as Petra leapt away from Oluo suddenly, gracefully flitting through the air before moving back toward Oluo and pulling her arm up in an attempt to punch him. Oluo grabbed her wrist and held her there for a long moment, smirking down at her as Petra tried to pull her arm out of his grasp but to no avail. It didn't escape his notice that Oluo leaned closer to her, the closeness not necessary considering he already had her arm trapped.
Levi's eyes narrowed at this, at the intensity of Oluo's stare and his daring proximity, and the sound of Eld clearing his throat caught his attention.
He realized that Eld had been watching him through this interaction, and the blonde gave him an accusatory stare, "You see? Even now, it's obvious that you want her, that you're jealous for her attention, jealous that Oluo's looking at her when she's dressed like that and not you."
Levi looked back at him and Eld continued, "Even if you have Petra convinced, you haven't convinced me in the slightest because it's written all over your face. There's no fucking way you rejected her after the banquet, and I'm not buying it for a second. I don't know what happened that night, but I'd bet that with whatever happened, your pride is getting in the way. I also know that the one who's taking the fall in all of this is Petra and I'm not happy about it. She's miserable, and the whole squad has been out of sorts ever since because you're being indecisive."
Levi tightened his fists, inhaling sharply as Eld moved toward him, powerful attacks being exchanged as a battle of speed began to take place. There were quick jabs, punches, ducks, and dodges that were traded between the two men and Levi all but growled, "I am not being indecisive. I backed off, Petra backed off – it's been three weeks of hell, but a consistent three weeks of hell."
Eld continued twisting, returning attack for attack without missing a beat – Levi was attacking him with intent to knock him out and end his irritating line of questions, but as expected, Eld's skill was undeniable. Eld grabbed Levi's fist at the same moment that the Captain grabbed his other fist, and the two continued to push and pull each other, both successfully immobilizing the other as they stared at each other heatedly.
Eld gave a sarcastic bite of a laugh as he looked down at Levi as their arms shook from the sort of tug of war they had fallen into. "Oh? So tell me Captain, what the hell was going on just a bit ago? You don't think I saw that – that all of us watched as you pulled Petra close to you? Tell me, what did you whisper in her ear that made her blush and give you those large eyes that made you smile? You really think I didn't see you look her up and down as she walked away? The way you looked at her when she took her shirt off just now? Dammit Levi, who do you think you're fooling in all of this?"
Levi pressed his lips together tightly, his voice low, "Eld. I'm not having this conversation with you; it's none of your damn business. Back the fuck off."
Eld rolled his eyes, "Oh sure, so you deny it before, but when I point out that you are in fact being inconsistent with proof no less, you just try to ignore it and say it's not my business? Well guess what Levi, you made it my business because this is my team too and you're not leading it properly right now."
Of all that Eld had said, all that he had thrown in his face and drug into the light, that grabbed the Captain's attention. At once he dropped his arms and instead of moving to attack or defend, Levi crossed his arms tensely and took a step toward Eld threateningly.
"What did you say?"
"Need me to say it again?" Eld retorted hotly, also crossing his arms as their match came to a complete halt now that the conversation was taking a more serious turn that overstepped the bounds of just a normal discussion, "You aren't leading this team properly! You refuse to acknowledge the bonds you've built with Petra, you refuse to address the team and confirm that things have in fact changed between the two of you, you're lying about what you think you can get away with, and you've been unapproachable for weeks now because you're torn up about it. You want to be around her, but you're too stubborn to apologize so you spend all day in your office sulking – what, just hoping that she comes to you? You're pathetic! Meanwhile, I can't tell you how many things I've had to do on the back end because the squad doesn't feel comfortable coming to you right now. Be it supplies, maintenance requests – tell me Levi, have you even noticed that no one has come to you for anything as of late? That no one has needed their Captain at all, for even the smallest of things? Even once? You didn't think that was strange?"
A sort of building rage was coming over Levi as his second in command reprimanded him, and the Captain gave a sort of snarl, his arms shaking from something unrelated to the previous battle, "Eld, that's enough."
The blonde just gave another sarcastic laugh, "Is it? So what's your plan then? Keep Petra at arm's length and reel her in when it's most convenient for you, only to push her away when your pride gets the best of you, break her heart and ignore her until she just 'gets over it' – then what, rinse and repeat for the rest of time? Face it Levi, you aren't strong enough to reject her. You couldn't let her go home, you couldn't reject her that night, and you sure as hell can't reject her now. You will always have your moments of weakness when it comes to her, and the more you try to stop it or fight it off the worse it's going to become for everyone. Just admit you like her and that you want to be in a relationship with her. Simple as that."
Levi gave a sarcastic, haughty snort, "Fuck off. You seem to forget that Petra and I have successfully not been in a relationship for five years and counting. You're taking this far out of proportion because you are wrong. I do not want to be in a relationship with her, or with anybody. That night was a onetime thing, Eld - a mistake."
"A onetime thing? A mistake? Right, I'd pay you good to say that to Petra's face right now, because you kissed her and that was certainly no accident." Eld reprimanded with critical, testing eyes, "Captain, I'll agree that you haven't been in a 'relationship' or whatever with her before, but you're a bigger fool than I took you for if you believe for even a moment that you can just walk away from her now. You've always been drawn to Petra, and now that you're married and those boundaries fell lax, I'm calling your bluff because like hell you can build them back up – you value her too much to shut her out completely, and what's more, you want her like a man wants his wife. Just fucking admit it for Maria's sake and let's all move on! So you want Petra. So you are attracted to her. So what?"
Levi rolled his eyes and turned over his shoulder, "I'm done Eld. I don't have to take this bullshit from you."
The Captain was actually walking away, and Eld matched him step for step as he continued speaking, anger coursing through him as Levi actually had the audacity to walk away from him mid conversation. "Hey asshole, I'm not finished talking to you!" Eld called out hotly, his tone loud and condescending.
"Well I'm done listening!" Levi retorted with an equal ferocity; his volume also raised as he continued marching away.
At the loud, obviously angry voices that rang across the training grounds, the rest of the squad paused from their training, watching in silence as Levi began walking off the field in an obvious fit of rage, and Eld chasing after him with an equal intensity, still shouting.
"See? You're just proving my point." Eld bellowed, "You refuse to actually fix anything, you just walk away from the problem and hope it fixes itself! We're sick and tired of this, Captain; just address it once and for all! We've all talked about it, the guys and me, and this is getting out of hand! You're being a coward and-"
Levi paused in his tracks and turned around, whipping back toward Eld and coming toe to toe with him in a flash, "So you've all decided this? You've all been talking about me behind my back and you accuse me of being a coward?" he stated in a tense, enraged hiss, then looked back toward the training grounds and noticed that his entire squad had paused from their assigned training and were each watching him and Eld with concerned, questioning eyes.
Levi gave a huff and nodded, a dark resolve coming over him as he pressed his lips together into a line, "Alright. Alright, fine. If you've all decided that's what you want, then let's fucking address it, here and now."
At Levi's suddenly dark tone and bitter resolve, Eld held his hands up in concern, knowing that if this was the mood Levi was in, he was only going to make things worse. His tone softened dramatically, "Now listen here Captain, there's-"
Levi pushed his arm out and shoved Eld to the side as he walked past him intentionally, eyes narrowed in determination as he spoke threateningly, "No, this is what you all talked about, right? This is what you wanted to see? We're doing this, Eld. If it makes me a better 'Captain' apparently, then I will set the record straight here and now so you little shits can settle it in your mind and we can all move on."
"Levi, listen to me. I really think you should-"
"Line up!" Levi shouted as he reached the middle of the field, crossing his arms as a sort of blind rage continued to overwhelm him, Eld's words ringing poisonously in his ear even now.
He was furious. They had all been talking? They had all been avoiding him? He had been aware of the tension and admittedly it had been quiet on his end of the hall for a while, but he hadn't thought much about it because he had been too busy thinking over his falling out with Petra and -
No, he mentally decided as he took a breath of preparation.
It had been over three weeks. He had been patient, he had tried to keep quiet and put it all behind him, but if his squad was dead set on forcing his hand, then he would oblige and make sure they didn't forget that he was still the head of this team, that he could in fact handle his adjusted standings with Petra, and that he was not to be overlooked just because Petra was gun-shy around him.
As his squad cautiously walked toward the center of the field toward them, an obvious concerned hesitation slowing their steps, his voice rose, "Now!"
They each ran to their spots after hearing his command, and Levi spoke loudly, anger evident in his every word, "Everyone to attention, now!"
Immediately they each saluted and stood perfectly still, though Eld's head was turned to him and Eld gave him a firm warning shake of his head, to which Levi snorted, "Yeah Eld, you can go fuck yourself, because you're the one who wanted this the most, right?"
There was a muffled groan and Levi glared at his team, pacing in front of them as he spoke, "Apparently there's been a little bit of gossip going on, and it ends here and now. From what I understand, it seems you are all going to Eld when you need something, because you are too spineless and intimidated to come directly to me?"
As Levi paced, he noted that not a single one of his subordinates were meeting his gaze and he paused in place, his voice dripping with malevolence, "That ends immediately. I am your Captain. Only in the event that I am busy in a meeting or have explicitly instructed otherwise are you to go to Eld for assistance. Is that understood?"
"Yes sir!" came the collective reply and Levi nodded and resumed pacing.
"Furthermore, it seems I've given you all far too much free time, because the fucking gossip doesn't stop just there. Rest assured, I can find something to fill the extra time you've had in the evenings, because it's clear you aren't disciplined enough to utilize it properly, and I'm sick and tired of your shit. Eld has confirmed with me that you are all concerned that I haven't been addressing my 'relationship' with Petra as of late, is that correct?"
At the mention of Petra's name, Levi watched his entire team's eyes collectively widen, and Petra specifically went considerably pale.
Watching this instant reaction only enraged Levi further, because it merely confirmed that Eld hadn't been lying; they had all talked about it, most likely when Petra hadn't been around and the men felt comfortable speaking feely about it without himself or Petra there to deter the conversation.
Fucking…
He was so beyond frustrated, feeling blood pounding in his ears as rage pulsed through him in waves. He needed to make a point so they got it through their heads that things were fine, he was in control, things were exactly as they needed to be, and he did not need them leering over his shoulder when it came to his standings with Petra because it was none of their damn business!
"It's time for some house cleaning." He confirmed with resolve, "Let me start first with the supposed 'men' on my squad. If you all have a problem with me, you come and say it to my damn face. There will be no more of this gossip about what I should, or shouldn't do when it comes to my squad. As your Captain I demand respect, and this going behind my back is to stop immediately. Is that understood?"
Another low, "Yes, sir."
Levi walked toward Petra then, his head held high as he looked down at her reprovingly. Her eyes were wide as an obvious nervousness came over her and he shook his head, watching her with narrowed eyes, "More house cleaning that needs to be addressed apparently: Is there a reason you defaulted to dressing like that, Petra? Was your shirt truly that overbearing that you had to remove it?"
He watched as Petra's eyebrows pulled down and she looked to her left where the rest of the squad was lined up beside her, silently pointing out that everyone else had also removed their shirts. As it stood now, he was actually the only one still wearing his, and if he were being honest, he probably would have removed it earlier, but the various line up of events prevented him from doing so and it certainly hadn't mattered now.
Even still.
He watched as Petra continued to look at the rest of her team in confusion, and they gave her equally puzzled looks in return. Watching his team exchange confused, blank looks between each other while in attention, caused Levi to grow even more agitated because even now his squad wasn't listening to him! Where was the discipline? Had they all gotten so comfortable, so cocky, that they didn't even respect basic military rules?
He cleared his throat sternly, "Excuse me? Listen up you fucks, you're all in attention so eyes forward! Now Petra, I don't care what they're wearing, I'm talking about you." He paused as he leaned down toward her, his voice low as he glared at the woman who had unintentionally brought so much tension and frustration in his life.
There was a mocking in his tone, his head cocked slightly as he spoke, "Do you like the attention? Does it make you feel warm and tingly when people watch you because you're dressed like this?" He quirked an eyebrow in challenge as her eyes widened; his voice cold as he spoke, "Well. If that's what you wanted, then you probably should have joined Squad Leader Michael's squad when you had the chance – you could get that sort of attention every fucking day. I'll bet you would have liked that, right?"
He watched as Petra took in a sharp inhale, and she bit her lip as a mortified, indignant blush rose to her face at his implications.
"Captain, that's out of line!" Eld's angered voice spoke up and Levi's attention moved to Eld as he stood up more fully, away from her.
Levi pressed his lips together in realization - it seemed Petra had told him about that too then. Shit, was there anything that they hadn't talked about? Just how long had his team been behaving like this? It seemed a full crackdown was well in order, because it was painfully obvious to him that they were all out of sorts and apparently needed to be micromanaged down to the smallest of details.
He crossed his arms and gave the blonde a long stare, "This is what you wanted, for me to be a better Captain and speak my mind, right? Stand down Eld, because I am not finished discussing the issues that you all wanted to have addressed." Levi looked back to Petra who was looking down to the ground in attempts to not meet his gaze and Levi shook his head firmly, "Oh no. None of that. Fucking look at me Petra; that's an order."
She hesitantly brought her gaze back up to him with a worried, hesitant expression and Levi snarled as his eyes met hers once again, "Just so you and everyone else understands," he directed his attention to Eld for a moment, then stared back down at Petra firmly, "Let me say it again because you seem to have forgotten what I told you when I proposed to you all those nights ago."
Petra was visibly biting her lip, trembling slightly as he leaned even closer to her and matched his eyes to hers. She flinched but held his gaze due to his order, even though it was obvious she wanted to do anything but look at him right now. At least one of them could still follow orders so it seemed.
Levi watched her with a grave expression, eyes boring into hers as he spoke viciously, "I do not want you, understand?"
He spoke each word slowly and with purpose, a malice underlying in his tone as he continued slowly, ensuring each word was painfully clear as he bit out every syllable with purpose, "I do not want a relationship with you. You are my wife merely on paper, so make no mistake, you are just my subordinate and nothing – nothing – more to me. I agreed to marry you strictly for the purpose of keeping you on my squad, so don't get some grand illusion that you're something special just because you've got my last name now. You're still just Petra Ral in my eyes, and absolutely nothing has changed."
Her eyes were red and glassy by the end of his explanation and she watched him with unfallen tears, her shoulders heaving as her breathing became irregular. He gave a nod and took a small step back as he looked at his team, certain that if that didn't placate their curiosity, nothing would.
"There. Now does everyone understand that?"
Though it was hesitant, there was a low, "Yes sir."
Levi exhaled in overwhelming aggravation, still just as frustrated as he leaned closer to Petra who struggled to keep his gaze, "Good. Now do you understand that, Petra Ackerman?" he spat her name out poisonously and she flinched again at his harsh tone, pained by the outright mocking and sarcasm that he spoke with as he said her proper, legal name.
She swallowed thickly and gave a shaky nod as a single tear ran down her face, "…Yes."
He tilted his head up and watched her narrowly, "Yes, what?"
She bit her lip and cleared her throat, her voice a quiet, trembling whisper as she forced herself to respond, "Yes, Captain."
"That'll do. Now, seems how-" his voice was strained as he grabbed the fabric of his own shirt and pulled it up over his head in a smooth motion, "you lost your shirt, here's mine."
He wadded the material up in his hands and threw it at her firmly and she caught the shirt as it slammed up against her face. She held the fabric in her hands and watched him in confusion, "Uh...sir?"
He crossed his arms, "Considering you enjoy being looked at so much, I'm about to make your wish come true. Put it on, and then you can go run laps around the entire campus until the dinner bell rings. Bet everyone in this whole damn campus will wonder why you're running countless lap after lap; seems a girl like you would enjoy something like that."
Petra's mouth fell open and she watched him with large eyes. When he merely watched her with a flat, unmoved and uncaring stare, she took a deep breath and sighed as another tear ran down her face. She gave a broken nod and, moving slowly, she pulled his shirt hesitantly over her head, putting her arms through the sleeves one at a time and refusing to look at him as she adjusted the fabric over her stomach so it laid properly.
"Good, now fucking get."
Her lip trembled again and she wasted no time, pushing her weight into her heels and sprinting away as though she was actually grateful to leave. She made her way toward the track that bordered the Scout's campus without another word and took off down the path, not stopping or even attempting to look back.
"Now as for the rest of you-" Levi started tensely, though when he turned back around, he was greeted by the glares of all of his subordinates, their stares so enraged and threatening that it caused him to lose his train of thought completely.
"What is wrong with you? The dinner bell? That's like three hours from now - have you lost your goddamned mind? What did she even do to you that justifies this?" Eld shouted loudly, and it wasn't a second later that Gunther was shouting next.
"You went too far, Levi! You think this is going to fix anything? Petra's been nothing but respectful and you treated her like dirt for no reason!"
He shook his head with wide eyes and shouted back at them in equal frustration, "What the goddamned fuck is it with you all? You wanted me to address it, and I fucking addressed it! Have I not made things perfectly clear to her and everyone now? What the hell do you fucks even want from me?"
Oluo's voice came next, a low grumble rather than a shout, and for some reason it cut twice as deep as anything else that had been said to him before. "Oh yeah, you addressed it alright. Made it perfectly clear that Petra deserves someone better than you."
Hearing his words, Levi snarled and took a large step toward Oluo, building momentum from his forward lunge and swinging his fist around until it connected with the man's jaw. Angry though he was, Levi knew how to control his strength so while it wouldn't knock him unconscious, wouldn't break his jawbone, Levi knew with confidence that it would hurt like a bitch.
Oluo stumbled back a number of steps as his hands went to his face, blood pooling over his lips as he coughed and spat blood into the dirt while shooting him a scathing glare. Though his eyes were watering from the sting, Oluo watched him defiantly and stood up slowly until he was standing proudly, "Fuck you, Levi. I refuse to acknowledge you as 'Captain' because you don't deserve the title, not after how you treated Petra."
Levi clicked his tongue and crossed his arms, "Yeah? Fuck you too, asshole. I'd ditch your title but you don't even have one to start with."
Oluo rolled his eyes and again spat into the ground as he continued to rub his jaw, and Levi took in a deep breath and waved his hand, "You know what, fuck all of you. I'm so fucking done with this. Dismissed or whatever, see if I give a damn."
He began walking off the field in an angry storm as thoughts continued to engulf him, though as he made his way across the arena, he paused in step, looking down as he passed by Petra's discarded shirt that she had torn off previously, the fabric pressed into the ground, completely forgotten about so it seemed.
Petra's words suddenly rang in his ear – that today was the day apparently. Today was the day that she would successfully beat him in a match, according to her. He had promised her another round and her excitement had been palpable, the tension finally gone between them for the first time in weeks. He had felt the rush of electric air when he pulled her close and whispered in her ear. She had gasped in surprise, but trusted him implicitly and remained beside him. Even after all he had put her through, it amazed him that she had allowed him to be close to her, without question, without explanation…
An unpleasant twisting began churning deep within the pit of his stomach, a sour sort of feeling resulting that made his breath catch in his lungs as he remembered what he had said to her, as well as the fallen tears that his words had produced.
…Why had he done that? Why did he…
He cleared his throat to empty his mind of the suddenly crushing recollection of all he had said, of how he treated his squad, how he had belittled Petra so purposefully, and the tightness in his chest didn't go away, instead only intensifying until his gut seemed to ache with a sudden sourness. He gave a long, shaky exhale and pushed his hands into his pockets, walking off the training grounds and swallowing thickly as he realized that he was walking away, completely alone.
...
End of Chapter
...
Alright yall, breathe.
I think I've been staring at this spot, wondering what to type for a long while now. Of course, I remember writing out this section and how hard that was for me, and I remember my immediate friends reading it, and their reactions…so…
Not that it helps, but yall remember the concept of flying too close to the sun? The perspective here was written out through Levi, in attempts to make you see, or perhaps better understand where he's coming from and why it happened like that. I think any other perspective just wouldn't have captured the problems or the fears and anxiety properly, and perhaps made it seem almost out of character through the eyes of someone else. The irony is, after reading it all over last night, I am convinced this is one of the most spot-on parts I have written thus far for Levi. I truly can't see it playing out any differently because he's been backed into a corner regarding one of his weakest areas in life - actual, meaningful intimacy - while at the same time, being told, with proof no less, that he's failing at one of his strongest areas of his life - his role as Captain. The combination of that, while being told that the same people he trusts are going behind his back and talking about him, could you imagine what that would do to someone like Levi, who has a hard enough time trusting and learning how to make meaningful relationships? Let's not even go into the fact he's been pissed off and desperate and lonely for a solid 3+ weeks, and it that moment it all seemingly boils down to Petra - who he had told he didn't want anything with, but she so easily crawled past his defenses and now look at the mess she had made for him! (Looks to above explosion and shrugs)
...You see it, right?
I was toying with the idea of doing another update this week, because I know this is a HARD section to be left on, but because it's such an important chapter, I don't want to post up an even sooner update, just to take the sting away. It's okay to burn a little, you know? Next chapter will come on Sunday, and we'll pick right back up as we always do.
Thanks for your support guys. I'll see yall next week.