They had pushed the Thomas hard, and by the time they reached the top of the bluff, the poor creatures were breathing raggedly and nearly shaking. Meryl saw figures in the near-distance—one of them massive, easily three times her own height—and she pulled back on the reins. Probably better to approach on foot, for appearances' sake, though honestly Meryl would much rather have the Thomas under her for the dual purpose of adding height and facilitating a quick getaway if needed.
At her side, Milly brought her Thomas to a halt as well. Meryl dismounted with some difficulty and watched the other woman slide down from her mount in one fluid movement, landing solidly on her feet and stroking the neck of the exhausted Thomas. Then Milly turned to Meryl's mount and did the same; Meryl didn't bother trying to comfort Thomas anymore. They only ever bit at her elbows, and she had no idea why.
"Hurry," she said to Milly, out of breath. Meryl pointed wordlessly up at the saddlebags and Milly dutifully opened what Meryl couldn't reach, digging around for the carefully sealed box they had prepared.
Meryl had told the Dankin sheriff that only one fact was consistent through all the descriptions, that there were no fatalities, but that wasn't the whole truth. There was another obscure common fact she had found frequently in her travels: the Human Typhoon seemed to have a soft spot for donuts. If the old adage, "The fastest way to a man's heart is through his stomach," had any truth to it, there wasn't any harm in trying. Assuming Vash the Stampede had a heart at all...
The box of pastries held tightly in both hands, her fingers clutching at it tightly enough to make the cardboard bow and the plastic crinkle, Meryl stood as straight as she could and squared her shoulders before striding purposefully toward the group of men. She felt Milly following close on her heels.
The men were facing away from them, all seemingly intent on something Meryl couldn't see. As they drew nearer, she realized they were actually standing in a circle and there were many more men than she had initially assumed; half a dozen had been hidden behind the giant, and now one of them had spotted Meryl and Milly under the giant's elbow.
"Hey!" he called, drawing a gun in an instant.
Meryl stopped abruptly, eyeing the gun. Milly bumped into her from behind and the stun-gun swung forward into the back of Meryl's knee. Her leg buckled and she nearly collapsed, but she caught her balance and was more comforted by the huge weapon's presence than she was annoyed by the near-stumble it had caused.
The rest of the circle had turned to see the women, and all of them wore identical looks of astonishment. Except the giant. Meryl looked up to him and saw only brief surprise before he fixed them both with a very sharp glare.
"Who are you?" he barked. Milly jumped in alarm, and Meryl couldn't help doing the same. His booming voice seemed to shake the ground beneath their feet.
"My name is Meryl Stryfe," she said, amazed that she sounded as calm as she did. "This is my partner—"
"Milly Thompson, sir." The younger woman's voice was not as unfaltering.
"We represent the Bernadelli Insurance Company," Meryl continued, glad she knew this speech as though rote. "We have business to discuss with the man known as Vash the Stampede." Milly pushed Meryl's elbow forward with one hand and the box she held jumped out toward the giant. "The donuts are for you," Meryl blurted, immediately wishing she had managed to phrase it better. How asinine...
The giant looked down at them, eyes narrowed. Meryl's hands began to shake, and the only other movement in the circle was of the stray green hairs of the giant's mohawk swaying in the slight breeze. For a moment there was only silence. Then his eyes widened in comprehension.
"You think I'm the Humanoid Typhoon?" he asked. He burst out laughing, and the other men started guffawing loudly as well. "That's the Humanoid Typhoon," said the giant, stepping back and pointing. Then he jabbed his own massive thumb into his chest, saying, "And I'm claiming the $$60 billion."
Flabbergasted, Meryl leaned out to see what he had been indicating. She gasped and dropped the box of donuts.
"You!" Meryl shouted in disbelief.
"Me?"
It was him, again. That bristle-blonde-haired maniac, sitting there in his red jacket, bound tightly around the torso with rope. He was looking up at her with a sheepish grin.
"Mr. Vash!" called Milly, smiling and waving.
"That's not him!" Meryl bellowed, clenching both fists tightly and stomping one foot even as the giant looked down at Milly excitedly.
"So he is Vash the Stampede!" the giant exclaimed. "You—"
Milly screamed as a shot rang out, a small plume of dust erupting at her feet. She danced backward a few steps and clutched at Meryl's shoulder.
Meryl's head had turned at the sound, as had that of every man there, including the captive man. A tall figure stood up on the ridge overlooking the area, staring down intently.
"Finally," said the man, with a bark of laughter. "Found you!" He was tall and lean, and he had a long-barreled rifle aimed directly at the giant's chest.
"What the hell?" Meryl whispered.
Under a tall, wide-brimmed and pointed hat, the man's face was obscured by shadows and a bushy moustache and beard. He was grinning broadly and chuckling.
"Watch where you're pointing that, asshole," growled the giant. Then he asked, "Are you here for the bounty? He's already mine."
"I am, as a matter of fact," said the man, not lowering his rifle. "My name is Ruth Loose, also known as Constance Rifle, and I've come for your head, Vash."
"Mine!" said the giant, in a barking laugh. "I'm not Vash the Stampede, he is!" He pointed again at the man sitting bound in rope, but Meryl noticed he was also slowly reaching for the huge metal boomerang at his hip.
"This is so not good," Meryl muttered to Milly.
"I won't fall for your tricks," called Ruth Loose. "Vash is a short-legged earringed giant in red!"
"What?" said one of the giant's men. "No he isn't!"
"He's a blonde man in a red coat, with a big gun!" said another.
"But we thought—" Milly glanced at Meryl. "The descriptions don't match!"
Oh, fantastic.
Yet more rumors, and still no idea what to trust.
Both men were shouting at each other now, each threatening the other with a massive weapon, be it the long-range rifle or the metal boomerang. The situation was starting to look as though it might spiral out of control at any second.
Meryl was torn. Their assignment was to babysit this Vash character and make sure he didn't cause any more damage, but at the moment there were two men who might be Vash and Meryl wasn't sure what to do. Especially now that it looked like they were about to kill each other.
"Excuse me, gentlemen," Meryl said, raising her voice, but no one turned their attention to her. "Please, there's no need for this to—"
"It's him!" shouted one of the giant's cronies. As though waiting for this rallying cry, all parties began shooting at once. Meryl tackled Milly to the ground—well, she dove for the taller woman's knees, anyway, bringing her down just the same—and the two women fell flat on their bellies, covering their heads.
Meryl's cheek was pressed hard against the sand-covered stone and she swore through her teeth as bullet casings rained down on them. Looking up after the initial volley of gunfire seemed to be over, she gasped; the man on the ridge had just launched into the air what looked like a jerry-rigged bomb made of six sticks of dynamite strapped together. It was sailing over the heads of the giant's henchman, headed straight for the green mohawk, and the big man roared and dived out of the way while his men ran for cover.
"Shit!" said Meryl, scrambling onto hands and knees. Milly was up even faster, and she grabbed Meryl's arm. She felt herself wrenched clean off the ground and flung sideways behind an enormous boulder. Meryl landed hard on her side and rolled up into a crouching position as the explosives went off. The sound and impact pressed in on her eardrums as though someone was trying to crush her skull with their hands. Milly cried out, and then coughed as acrid black smoke wafted over them.
Someone else nearby was screaming, and Meryl was afraid one of the giant's men might have been seriously injured by the blast. She was rising slightly, hoping to peek around the side of the boulder without being seen, but something massive fell almost on top of them, less than an arm's length away. For an instant Meryl was terrified it was another, larger explosive.
Until she realized it was still screaming.
"You!" she said, for the second time that afternoon. The man they so frequently ran across was still tied up, and had apparently been thrown into the air by the force of the blast. The tips of his spiky blonde hair were smoldering in some places and he was flailing as best he could, long gangly legs flying around and shoulders and torso wriggling around despite his arms being tied tightly to his sides. And he was still letting out a high-pitched, little-girl scream with his eyes clenched tightly shut.
Meryl sized him up in a glance; no blood, no bones sticking out, no bits of him blasted away.
"Relax!" she shouted over his screaming, grabbing his shoulder. "You're fine!" When he still hadn't stopped, or even acknowledged her presence, Meryl slapped him hard across the face.
"Ma'am," said Milly, ever reproachful of Meryl's more violent outbursts. But it had worked. The man suddenly went quiet and still and opened his eyes, blinking blearily.
"Oh hello!" he said, grinning happily at them through the clearing smoke.
There was another explosion and Meryl and Milly both ducked, Meryl half-throwing herself forward to crouch over the head and torso of the immobilized man. Her goal had been to protect him from any flying debris, but he had rolled toward her at the same time, presumably in an attempt to be better sheltered by the boulder giving them some cover. It all resulted in a the two of them colliding and getting thoroughly tangled up together. Meryl had been supporting herself with one hand on the ground on either side of his body, so when he rolled toward her she found her left arm trapped under him, forcing her shoulder down to the ground as he kept rolling forward.
"Gah!" was all she managed, and then he was on top of her and still moving. As he rolled off her chest she was able to briefly catch her breath again, but she realized her right leg had become tangled between his knees. When he continued rolling, it wrenched painfully on her hip and she seized the collar of his jacket, hurriedly hauling herself up onto his chest so he wouldn't just roll off with her leg.
Meryl was choking and blinded by the smoke and dirt kicked up by the explosives, so she shut her eyes tight and buried her face in his neck, smelling sweat and something sweet and holding on for dear life as he kept rolling over and over. Moments later they stopped abruptly, slamming into the back of the boulder. She coughed, unable to breathe, and found herself on the bottom again, nearly crushed under the man's weight. The ropes binding him were rough and hard against her chest while her concealed derringers were digging painfully into her back.
"Get off me!" Meryl demanded, freeing her hands and trying to shove him away.
"I can't!" he said, laughing and trying to shrug. His long, pointed nose was jammed into her left eye, and she tried to turn her face away but it just fell into her ear, tickling her as he giggled uncontrollably.
"Get off me!" she shouted again, furious, and as if on cue he simply disappeared. Meryl took in a great breath and sat up on her elbows, watching Milly pull the man up to his knees by the shoulders. "Thank you, Milly," she said, glaring at the man. He gave her another sheepish smile.
Getting up to her feet again, still crouching low, Meryl cringed at another loud burst of gunfire and shouting. She and Milly shared a glance. Carefully, Milly set the man down with his back against the rock.
"Stay here," Meryl ordered, sparing him a glare before darting out from behind the outcropping, racing for another boulder closer to the raging battle.
"Wait!" called the man, starting to wriggle around again. "Untie me! Wait!"
But Milly had already followed her partner, leaving the man behind and (hopefully) out of harm's way. They took refuge behind the low boulder and waited for a pause in the all the sounds of the fighting before daring to look out at the scene.
Meryl was having trouble seeing through the smoke and dirt, but what she could make out horrified her. The giant's boomerang was slicing apart huge chunks of the landscape, cutting through rock as easily as butter. Ruth Loose seemed to have an endless supply of explosives, and none of the giant's cronies appeared to be running low on ammunition. It was a scene of complete devastation; many of the giant's men were already dead or dying, lying in pools of blood, some with limbs missing.
Next to her, Milly let out a small noise of distress. Meryl turned to see the younger woman becoming more and more pale. Sudden shots made Meryl start, and she drew two derringers in an instant, but not before a huge metal claw from Milly's stun-gun snapped shut on the giant's henchman who had noticed them standing several yarz away.
Though she still looked pale, there was a determined look on Milly's face as she held the stun-gun in her strong grip, prepared to fire again if needed. Meryl was glad of it. Then another figure appeared through the smoke and Milly trained her stun-gun on his profile. Meryl recognized the man's pointed hat and let out a small cry, realizing Ruth loose was lobbing another bomb their way.
"Oh fuck," she said, thinking fast. There was no more cover to be had; she and Milly were barely hidden behind the boulder and it would give them almost no protection. "Just run!" Meryl shouted. "Just go!"
Milly took off sprinting, and Meryl had only managed ten yarz or so before the explosive went off just behind them. Meryl felt the heat on her neck and shoulders as though it burned through her clothes, and the blast picked her up off her feet and threw her some distance before dropping her forcibly on the hard-packed dirt. She rolled, trying to spread the blow of the impact over the whole of her body, but it still hurt everywhere. When she finally came to a stop, Meryl lay on her stomach, wondering momentarily if she had broken any ribs.
"Ma'am!"
Milly had appeared at her side, kneeling, looking terrified.
"I'm fine," said Meryl, figuring it was mostly true. The younger woman helped her up, though she still felt unsteady on her feet. Meryl could feel grit stuck to her skin all over, and she wiped her face on her sleeve. She was surprised to see a smear of blood on the white fabric and touched the side of her face gingerly. It stung, and she pulled her fingers away to see the tips glisten red.
"Ma'am, you're hurt!" Milly said, concerned.
"Forget it for now," Meryl said, wiping the blood from her fingers onto her sleeve with the rest. "Let's just get the hell out of here, we need to warn the town before it's too late."