MONOLOGUE 9- NORA COSMA

NORA

Unbelievable. Un-fucking-believable. I can't believe my ungrateful son did that to me. After all I do to provide for his family and the wife he married behind my back, this is how he treats me! I don't know how much longer I can put up staying with this abusive family anymore! It's like they don't even treat me like a goddamn person. I'm everyone's fucking slave.

I've always hated Wanda, almost as much as I hate my bitch husband, Linnie. She reminds me so much of the woman that took my first husband away from me. Pink, swirly hair, nagging voice, a body that's quite overweight in my opinion. I could never see what Cosmo saw in her. He made such a terrible mistake. I can't fucking believe what he said to me and Linnie and lunch this afternoon.

So, the little shit stops by for lunch which, whatever, I was hoping to just watch TV since I have to work my ass off all day but whatever, and he's like, "I need to talk to you about something", like a damn pussy. Spit it out damnit! Have some goddamn balls to tell me upfront! Oh wait, you're a guy..nevermind.

Anyways, so Cosmo fucking decided to sit down and eat the groceries that I fucking pay for with my fucking money, and I happen to notice he's put on some weight as well. Then, out of nowhere, ta-da! The little fucker's pregnant! With Wanda's kid of all people! Wow, way to go son! Am I supposed to be happy you let one of my nemesis fuck you? Should I be proud, because I don't feel it. I deeply regret not teaching them how to fuck properly when they were kids. Maybe then, this bullshit would've happened.

I still remember the time we had Darren (I refuse to call him Schnozmo, what a stupid ass name) and Chelsea when they were kids, and I found a positive pregnancy test in the bathroom. I ended up lining everyone up to tell me who it was, and whoever it was, was getting their ass beat. I've got no more patience for ungrateful family members spending my money and making me look like a bad mom. I'm a good mom, goddamnit. These children should be grateful! This family would be nothing without me!

They're both still young, so I figured maybe it was an accident. Trust me, I've had that experience with Linnie way too many times, thanks to his irresponsibility. I suggest to Cosmo that to get rid of the baby, tell Wanda the kid isn't hers, or drop the little shit off at a fire station or a police station. Somewhere you can't get arrested for child endangerment. I've also suggested that they drop the brat off at an orphanage or even abort the baby, and you know what Cosmo fucking does? He starts yelling at me, cursing Linnie and I, and storming out of the house like I didn't teach him some goddamn respect.

Linnie tried to intervene of course. When does that damn money ever mind this business. Hopefully that black eye'll quiet him down for a while. For now, he's too busy crying his little eyes out. What a pussy.

I'd forgive him storming out if he left to give one of my suggestions a try, but knowing his disrespectful ass, I know he won't.

I do so much for these two ungrateful men in my life. I give Linnie food and shelter, and I raised Cosmo since he was a child. I did more than what anyone has ever given him in a lifetime. I deserve better goddamnit! I'm so sick of being treated like a doormat! Why the fuck does everyone hate me! Gah!

I'm so sick of this shit. I'm headed to the bar, but I gotta make sure Linnie picks this bullshit up from the table first.

Linnie! Come get the shit YOU left, you fucking bitch!