Another little drabble.

My lovely beta and eblonde mentioned something about how all of the events in s 4 must have been affecting Kurt, and the angst he experienced (as if he hasn't had enough, poor Grumpchkin). So, here's my take on how things finally start to catch up to him. Post 4x17.

Heather, thanks for the proofread, again, and helping me to get out of the writer's block.

Let me know what you think.

Sleeping Demons

Jane woke up to a feeling of chill. Her comforter had slipped off her shoulders and she had goosebumps on her arm. It took her a second or two to realize that something was missing. The warm, solid form of Kurt that was often pressed against her was not there now. She rolled onto her back, looking towards the bathroom, but there was no light coming from under the door.

"Kurt?" She whispered.

Receiving no reply, she got up and put on her bathrobe to ward off the chill of the apartment. Tiptoeing into the hallway, she noticed a faint light coming from the living room. As she got closer, she saw him.

Kurt was sitting on the couch, wearing only his pajama bottoms. The only light in the room came from the table lamp by the couch, its soft light enough for him, for whatever he was doing.

He had a small box on the coffee table in front of him. Around the box, on the table, were what appeared to be photos: a couple of prints, and a polaroid or two. Next to the box sat Kurt's unopened bottle of Scotch and a glass. He was lost in thought, as he didn't show any signs of noticing her presence when she called out to him. He was holding one photo in his hands, tracing it gingerly with his finger.

As Jane took another step closer her heart shattered; Kurt's shoulders were shaking, tears running down his cheeks. He must have sensed her presence, as he lifted his eyes away from the picture and saw her.

He brought his hand to his face, hastily wiping his tears away with the back of his hand. "Sorry if I woke you." He cleared his throat, avoiding her eyes and glancing away. "Go back to sleep."

Instead, she walked up to him slowly, laying a gentle hand on his back. "Kurt…" His skin was almost cold to her touch, and now, next to him, she could see the sweat glistening on his brow. A nightmare.

Jane glanced down at the small box and the photos. Most were old photos, their colors faded. Looking at them she realized what they were. Photos from Kurt's childhood. Of Taylor Shaw, and of him. A couple of the photographs were newer, of her. They must be candid shots that Kurt had taken with his phone. One of them was of her sleeping on the same couch that he was now sitting on, and another was of her, sitting out in the park with her sketchbook in her lap, concentratedly drawing something. She had never seen any of the pictures before.

She ran her hand down his arm, caressing the knuckles of his hand still holding the photo. "Childhood photograph?" Her tone was cautious, she saw the pain in Kurt's features.

"Yeah. This was…" Kurt's voice quivered and he cleared his throat again. "This was taken in the summer before Taylor disappeared. Emma took it."

Jane leaned in closer to get a better look. It was a picture of Taylor and Kurt. They were sitting on a blanket in the yard, clearly on a picnic. The little girl had ice cream all over her face and she was laughing at Kurt, who was pointing at a large chocolate muffin in his hand, a large chunk of it already missing as was evident from the chocolate traces on his cheek in the picture.

Jane gave an affectionate chuckle. "I see you liked chocolate then, too." She cast a loving look at Kurt, running her hand through his hair. "It's a nice picture. You both look very happy," she spoke softly to him.

"Yeah, we were." Kurt's reply was wistful, and Jane's heart ached for him. She saw the traces of the tears on his cheeks and felt the tired tension radiating off him.

She sat down next to him on the couch. She guessed the box's contents were something that Kurt hadn't intended for her to see, something still so intensely raw that he had kept the box private. She knew that whatever had caused him to take it out from wherever he kept it must be something that upset him greatly.

She caressed his arm, hoping to soothe his demons. "I've never seen that box," she ventured carefully, hoping to make sure he didn't feel like she was accusing him of something. "What made you take it out?"

He carefully placed the picture back in the box and glanced toward the balcony. "It's nothing." He gave her a quick, tense smile, but avoided eye contact. "I'm sorry I woke you. Go back to bed, I'll be right there."

Jane hesitated for a moment, wondering if she should just drop it. But she still sensed his unease, and wanted to try and help if she could. She reached for his hand and squeezed it gently. "Something upset you."

He gazed at the floor, shaking his head. "It was just a nightmare, it brought up the memories of Taylor again." He tried to dismiss it. "I don't want this on your shoulders, Jane. You've been through enough."

She didn't know if she should be touched or infuriated by his words. "Kurt…for better or for worse, remember?" She asked him rhetorically before continuing softly. "We promised not to keep secrets from each other."

She put her hand on his cheek, caressing the stubble there before gently raising his chin so she could look at his face. Her heart contracted painfully at the sight.

He was biting his lip, tears brimming his eyes again.

"Kurt, please. You've been here for me through all of his; you've been my anchor, my support. Let me carry you for a while."

At her tender plea his resolve broke, and he sobbed. He leaned his arms against his knee, burying his head in his hands.

He spoke quietly amid his tears. "I've been having this recurring nightmare. About that night in the woods. I keep….I keep digging, but I just can't find the right place. I can hear you screaming my name, but at some point I'm not sure if it's you…you or Taylor calling for me." He sobbed again, his tears landing on the floor. "I can hear your screams, and all I know is that I need to save you, both of you. But I fail…I can never find the place." He looked up at her, agonized. "I can't bear to lose you, Jane. I love you so much."

He averted his eyes, but Jane couldn't watch him suffer alone.

Swallowing her own tears, she reached for him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. "Come here," she murmured and pulled him gently into her embrace. "I love you, too," she whispered. Kurt wrapped his arms around her, his breath hitching as he cried into her chest.

"Shh….it's okay," Jane shushed him, soothingly running her hand through his hair. She held him close, whispering to him as his breathing calmed. "I'm right here with you. You found me." She kissed his temple softly. "I'm never going to leave you."

The minutes ticked by slowly as she kept stroking his hair. His eyes were closed when she glanced at him, and she could tell from his breathing that he was starting to fall asleep.

"Kurt?"

"Mhh?"

"Come on, let's go to bed. Otherwise you won't be getting off this couch without a chiropractor."

"Are you calling me old?" He mumbled against her sleepily.

"No, but I know your back is going to be killing you in the morning if you sleep here like this. Come on." She nudged him and got up, before leaning into him as he stood. Leaning on one another, they made their way to the bedroom to hopefully get a few more hours of sleep before another hectic day began.