Afternoon all yall!
For those who jump at my 9am ish alerts, today I got a late start and am just now rolling around to this update. All I gotta say is buckle up, because this chapter is a bit of a long one. Honestly, most of these chapters are long ones, but believe it or not, I seriously think we have maybe 10ish chapters until the end?
It doesn't feel like it sometimes, but I did name this arc the 'wrap up' arc for a reason. Either way, I am looking forward to wrapping this story up in a bow and moving onto some of my newer ideas that I really can't wait to bring out for yall! Until then however, happy holidays and enjoy!
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…
Petra gave a nervous, staggering sort of exhale as she looked up toward the clock and gave an agitated bite to her lip.
She had been waiting for Levi now for some time, because her little order from her favorite shopkeeper had officially arrived. A few weeks back, she had gone to the medic tent and thanks to a certain Captain pulling some strings, her appointment had gone without issue and she had almost the entire afternoon left over to go shopping.
True to her word, she had shamelessly spent almost every bit of the money that the Garrison had given her, and after restocking up on some essentials – new shampoos and conditioners, a few more sets of undergarments to replace some of her more worn out sets – and finding she still had a large amount of funds left over, she had eventually found herself back at a rather expensive shop she had become admittedly fond of – a few ideas already in mind as to what she wanted to purchase from the talented seamstress. She had been there for almost the entire evening, laughing and relaxing in the store, and when the shop eventually closed and the older woman had invited her to stay for dinner, Petra had been more than happy to oblige.
They discussed her trip back home, how the marriage was going, and how long her order would take to be made and when it could be picked up. Today had in fact been the day, and considering she didn't have any early morning responsibilities to see to, Petra had gone into town and picked up her order the moment the shop had opened. When she had picked it up just earlier today, at the time she had felt super confident and wanted to use it is soon as possible, but now, sitting alone in Levi's room and wearing nothing but a sheer and lacy, baby pink teddy – she was extremely nervous for reasons she couldn't quite place.
She looked down at herself, admittedly a bit nervous, trying to calm her nerves because she thought she looked…well, pretty damn good. The lingerie, if her opinion meant anything, was sexy and revealing, but not actually see through, because she had wanted something that would leave his imagination running wild. The laced garment had a fitted bodice at the top that pressed her chest upward, paired with a deep plunging neckline to lead the eye, where more than a fair amount of cleavage was on prominent display.
The lace detailing continued down over the expanse of her stomach, where there were various cutouts in the lace to highlight her pale skin, and the garment ended just a few inches shy of her navel, where a simple pair of matching tie on panties brought the outfit to a teasing, sultry finish.
She knew Levi would like it, she knew he would never complain about being taken by surprise in such a way, yet even still, she was increasingly anxious for reasons that were impossible to place. It was usually Levi who made the first move, so because of that, with some of the free time she had found herself with, she had wanted to try her hand at being intentionally seductive…it was just when put to the test, it was clear to her that she knew very little on the subject because she didn't know how to go about such a thing.
Should she be laying down on the bed, seductively, perhaps?
That seemed like the right thing to do but…what would that even look like? What if she tried to strike some sort of sexy pose, but ended up looking absolutely horrible instead? She definitely didn't want to be laughed at.
Maybe she should be standing; she could try popping out a hip or leaning forward in some confident, attractive manner that would give the illusion that her curves were a bit more prominent. And yet posing just seemed so…unpractical. For one, it would be obvious she was striking a pose, and for two, heaven only knew how long she'd have to hold that position and pray that Levi walked in before her muscles locked up and started cramping.
Petra gave a quiet groan, finding herself pacing across his bedroom floor because gods, maybe this had been a bad idea from the start. She should have just worn it to bed one night or something, and it would have been a happy surprise in the very unlikely event that Levi decided to visit her that night.
As she was pacing his room, chewing her bottom lip and somewhat fiddling with the idea of throwing her normal clothes back on and aborting the mission completely, she heard the ever familiar cadence of Levi's footfalls as his boots tapped across the tile of the hallway, and at once her stomach seemed to sink with a nervous dread.
It was too late now.
She found herself cautiously turning over her shoulder, a nervous expression still on her face as she bit her lower lip when the turning door handle grabbed her attention, and as the door opened, Petra watched timidly as Levi took a step into the room, his expression blank because he hadn't known that she would be in his room waiting for him.
As Levi took a single step into the room, he all but paused midmotion when he realized he had company – realizing further that this was not an average, casual visit from his wife, and Petra gave an exhale and turned around toward him more completely, wishing she could maybe be more confident or that she could shoot him a coy, flirtatious smile; perhaps say some seductive line or some sultry thing that would take him by surprise all the more, but before she could so much as take a breath, Levi took a startled inhale.
"Holy shit."
At once, Levi closed the door behind him very fast, almost leaning into the wooden surface for a few moments as though…collecting himself? A silence extended across the room as the Captain remained unnaturally still, staying in place for a prolonged moment, his forehead eventually brushing against the surface of the door as he shook his head in clear bewilderment. Petra realized in a sort of wonder that she really must have taken him by surprise, to such an extent that he had to take a moment to pull himself together outright, because he had been in the room for close to a minute now without so much as a word further.
When Levi finally looked over toward her, his expression was conflicted, as though he didn't know what to do or how he was supposed to respond. Had she done something wrong? Oh gods, maybe she should have tried posing or something – with him just staring at her like this, her nerves were starting to eat her alive! She was standing in the middle of the room, one arm crossed over her stomach because Levi was just watching her with such a strange expression, still frozen at the doorway and not moving to close the distance between them or reach out to her or anything!
Admittedly, Levi found it was difficult to know how to react, because even though it was Petra, it wasn't often he found himself so completely, wholly taken by surprise to an extent like this. To see her at all, was surprising, but to see her and know exactly what she intended, exactly how his evening would be spent – such a great alternative to what he assumed his night would be comprised of – he wasn't even sure how to put his thoughts into words.
His eyes scanned her body, the painfully erotic expression across her face because with her large green eyes and the way she was biting her lip, the way her arms pressed her chest together and the way her legs were angled that made them look so damn long and stunning – fuck, it was like he couldn't breathe.
That outfit she was wearing…there was no mistaking that it was clearly lingerie. He hadn't even known she had owned something like that and…his eyes scanned her body all the more and when he noticed the hand tied bows resting at her hips, his eyes following the line of ribbon as he realized that the pastel pink ribbons were the only things holding up her panties to begin with, his breathing hitched and he wanted to groan because fuck that was hot.
"Petra…" he barely whispered, still unable to look her in the eye because he just couldn't stop looking at her, "Is this…is this for me?"
He had swallowed then, a painfully dry sensation because gods, he wanted her so bad right now, he had wanted her for weeks now but the time just hadn't been there and…
Even still he remained frozen at the door; some guarded, skeptical part of him continued to stall in place because he was undeniably overwhelmed. Never, never in his entire life did he think he'd come home to a beautiful woman – his wife no less – with a smile on her face and something like that on, wanting nothing more than to spoil him because Petra…she was in love with him.
Gods, it was almost too much for him to fathom sometimes, even though she had told him so herself more than once.
Petra had heard his question of course, and all at once her nervousness left her because his question was so profound that it admittedly confused her.
"For you?" she repeated in question, cocking her head at an angle in attempts to meet his conflicted gaze, and Levi felt his lips part when a lock of her hair fell forward from off her shoulder and slipped down into the line of her cleavage in a cascading caress, "Uh Levi…who else do you think this would be for? I mean, this is your room isn't it?"
He had taken a few cautious steps forward, mentally kicking himself because he supposed it was a rather stupid question, but as he moved toward her, the door to his bedroom opened from behind him and Levi froze in place, turning toward the door with wide eyes because this was not exactly a good time for company.
"Hey Captain, sorry to bother but about next week's material? I was looking it over and-" It was Eld that walked in, a studious expression across his face as he reviewed his notes with a critical stare, and as he looked up in attempts to find the Captain, his eyes landed instead on a very indecent Petra, who was already gaping as she all but ran behind Levi in embarrassment with a high pitched squeal of retreat.
An instantaneous, pleased grin came across the blonde's face and he gave Petra a cheeky laugh as he leaned to one side to catch a better glimpse of her skimpy little getup, chuckling all the more when her eyes narrowed and she pressed herself against Levi self-consciously, to which the Captain took an immediate sharp inhale.
"Hey hey Petra, looking good! You're a lace kinda gal, eh? Totally called it. You just won me a bet, in fact. I'll admit though, that color's a little delicate for your brutish personality, don't you-"
"Eld! Get out!"
"Fucking voyeuristic asshole, get the fuck out of my room!"
The couple's complaints were roared simultaneously, and Levi was already shoving the door shut with his heel, all while Eld was snickering at their collective offense, relieved by the fact that he had unintentionally walked in on them now, rather than ten minutes later, as that would have been a different experience entirely that wouldn't have been as easy to laugh off.
Eld moved out of the room with a certain fire in his steps because the Captain was royally pissed off, and he barely managed to dodge a bludgeoning smack to the back of the head as Levi slammed the door shut and made a point of locking the door with a violent rattle of the metallic handle.
Hearing Levi give a low grumble from inside the room, Eld leaned toward the door, unable to resist the temptation to ruffle the couple's feathers, and he gave a taunting smirk, "So Captain, I know you'll be a little occupied for a bit so…what, maybe ten minutes I should be good to come back? Maybe fifteen, if it's a good day for ya?"
"I fucking swear to god-"
Eld didn't press his luck any further and merely shook his head, giving a light tap on the door in good nature, "I'm kidding, Captain. Tell you what, I didn't mean to ruin your little moment, so if anyone starts looking for you or Petra, I'll tell them you're in Erwin's office and that you won't be out for a while. You two have fun; no one else will bother you."
As he walked away, there was a grumble from the Captain, "Shit, why the hell is it always Eld?"
"Uh, always? What do you mean, Captain?"
"Fuck, uh nothing. It's nothing Petra."
From inside the room, Levi was still glaring at the door suspiciously, and it wasn't until Eld's footsteps were heard retreating, until he was completely out of ear shot, that Levi groaned and turned toward Petra with an apologetic look. "Damn, I'm really sorry about that. I normally lock the door but I was…well, pretty distracted. Are you mad? I just…I don't want you to leave." He watched her with a defeated sigh, and Petra smirked.
"Well I mean, I wasn't trying to dress up for anyone else, and your negligence did make it so Eld got a sneak peak and insulted my 'brutish' personality. Now you'll have to make it up to me and I'm staying right here until you do."
Levi gave a slight amused grin, looking back at her and giving a soft tilt of his head as he ran his eyes up her form, "Well in my defense, what's a man to do, when he comes back to his room and sees something like this waiting for him? Forgive me for being impressed. For whatever its worth, this color actually...really suits you."
As he spoke, he ran a single finger over the band of her stomach that was completely bare, and his finger wrapped around one of the lace ribbons that held up her panties, his eyes showing an equal mix of sheer lust and complete anticipation. Seeing the way his eyes lingered on her sides as his fingers toyed with the ribbons, Petra could only smirk, because she had had a feeling that Levi would be intrigued by that little detail, and she offered no resistance when his hands began roaming her skin as he looked across the lacy garment with an appraising focus.
"Is this…new?" Levi asked in a low whisper, curling the ribbon around his finger all the more until it was just shy of unraveling, as though he were torn on whether he wanted to untie it right then, or if he wanted to save that bit of gratification for later, and Petra nodded.
"I know you probably won't approve of me spending all my money but…I don't know, I figured that you were an equal part of the gas shortage success, so I wanted to spend the funds I earned on something that we could both shopkeeper, you know the one, her name is Melinda by the way-"
As she spoke, Levi gave a soft 'Mhm' as though to confirm he was listening, although he was already mentally checked out as his thumbs drew circles into her skin, into the cut outs across her stomach, and he leaned forward and ran the tip of his nose into the swell of her very presented, all too accessible breasts.
Petra had continued speaking just the same, not even missing a beat when Levi leaned down and picked her up, moving her toward the bed step by step as she continued to explain how the shopkeeper and her had decided on what sort of outfit to make – because apparently she was so petite that something custom was in order – and Levi gave another 'Mhm' as he pulled his shirt off, joining her on the bed and leaning over her until she was forced to lay back into the bed, all while Petra continued prattling on about the entire process of getting it fit and ordered.
When Petra took an additional breath, as though preparing to explain god knows what, she instead remained silent as she finally seemed to look up at him, and she traced her fingers down his neck, giving a pleased smile of contentment when Levi sighed and leaned into her light caress with abandon. "Sorry, I'm rambling aren't I? I'm just nervous because I wanted this to be perfect for you, and maybe the presentation wasn't all that I thought it would be. Erwin told me that he was giving leadership the weekend off, so I figured that I'd sneak into your room tonight and try to take advantage of you before someone else tried to steal you away."
Levi had almost chuckled at her words, but before he could respond, Petra's eyes suddenly narrowed and a serious expression came across her face, "Actually now that I think about it, I have a bone to pick with you Levi."
The Ackerman blinked, not sure if he had actually done something wrong or if she was just being dramatic, and Petra took a breath and sat up onto the bed with a sudden glower, "You. You knew!"
The Captain blinked, "Knew…? I knew what?"
Her expression seemed to darken and she jabbed him in the chest with a pointed finger, "About Erwin! And Hanji! And them…being a couple, or a thing, or a something! When that meeting started up and they were all cutesy and cuddly, you walked right in without even the slightest bit of shock or surprise, because you already knew! You knew the whole time and you never even told me!"
At Petra's sudden change of conversation, Levi made a face and held up a hand, "Fuck, that's what you want to talk about? Can we…not? You come in my room dressed like that and get my hopes up, when all you really want is to talk about Erwin and Four Eyes? You…for real? Yeah they're a couple, who cares?"
Levi had moved closer toward her, leaning in to try and kiss her, but Petra ducked to one side and watched him indignantly, "I care! I mean, it's the Commander and Hanji! That's big news Captain!"
Petra knew better than to let her voice raise where their conversation might be overheard, but the shrillness in her voice was just as palpable and after being rejected a kiss, Levi found himself running a finger down her side, desperate to change the topic and to get back to the original reason she had paid him a visit.
"Not really. They've been a thing for a while but-"
"How long is a while?"
"I don't know," Levi grumbled, giving an agitated sigh and shrugging in growing impatience, "Maybe a year, year and a half? Maybe longer than that? That's when I found out about it, but you know damn well that sort of thing can't get around the regiment and I don't exactly engage in that sort of gossip. If it makes any difference, I think they've cleared their relationship with all the right people, but to be honest with you it's not my business so I don't get involved."
Levi leaned toward her, starting at her ear and nipping down her jaw line with a series of hungry kisses as he pulled her against him, "And to be upfront about it, you shouldn't either. No doubt they're both spooked as hell now that someone else found them out, but I know you wouldn't hurt them by spreading rumors so I didn't plan on bringing it up at all. Yeah, they're a thing. Yeah, they're probably fucking and have been for a long time, and no, I do not want to think about it, or talk about it anymore because I'm trying to focus on you. If you're goal is to set the mood by bringing up Erwin and Four Eyes, I'll tell you now that this conversation isn't exactly going to do it for me. Drop it, okay? It's between them, and you rambling off about it here doesn't do anything for anyone – just creeps me the fuck out. Besides, there's a lot of things I'd rather be doing with you right now, if you don't mind."
Levi tilted her chin up, giving her a single, soft kiss – the action requiring a vast level of restraint considering how badly he wanted to kiss her in a much more passionate, demanding sort of way, but the softness of his approach seemed to give Petra a moment of pause as she lightly kissed him back, relaxing against him as she gave a gentle, contented sigh against his lips.
She pulled back from him ever so slightly and smiled, "I'm happy for them, Levi. They're your best friends, right? Does it make you happy to know that they have each other? A secret relationship like that – it just sounds so romantic! I've been working with both of them now for a number of months and I didn't even know. It must be hard for them, always having to keep up the pretenses like that. But I suppose in a sense, the waiting would only make it more meaningful come the times where they can actually-"
Levi groaned and gave her a disgusted look, "Gross, don't make it sound so fucking sappy. At the very least, they have each other and it means they bother me less. I suppose that makes me happy, if anything."
Petra smiled at his stubborn words, and she gave him a serious look as she retorted, "And you make me happy, Captain. I've actually been planning this for a while, and I've been working hard to finally spend some real time with you. I'm trying to think of everything I wasn't able to tell you before…"
She paused and eventually continued, "Well, I'm expecting my birth control to come in any day, but as a heads up the doctor says it will take a full month's dosage before it will actually take effect, so we'll still need to be careful for a while longer yet." Levi nodded in understanding and Petra continued, "You probably already know this, but I've been working on your paperwork and trying to help get you caught back up little by little, and then yeah, I went shopping a few weeks back and while I was out, I tried to buy something special for you. I've never owned anything like this so…I'm honestly a little nervous."
"Don't be." Levi whispered seriously, his words almost cutting off her own, and Petra blushed at the intensity of his stare. Before he could speak further, Petra gave a quiet whisper and bit her lower lip in a shy, embarrassed manner, "There's actually…something else too."
"Something else?" Levi repeated in admitted interest, already looking her up and down, then around his room because with his focus being on her so damn attractive lacy mind fuck, it was highly possible that he had in fact missed something, and he was curious as to what other surprises Petra had apparently planned out for him. When she moved to sit up, Levi had backed up to give her space, but Petra shook her head and pulled him back toward her, until his head was pressed near the hollow of her shoulder. He was confused for a moment, turning his head toward her neck and debating on just kissing her skin and drawing those amazing sounds out of her because he could only be so patient when she looked like this, but that was when he finally noticed it and he couldn't help but smile outright.
It was subtle, so soft and delicate that he had missed it at first, but he leaned into her and almost sighed because now that he had noticed, damn, it was unmistakable.
"Perfume." He ran his nose up her neck, a featherlight, tender caress because fuck, she really had gone all out for him, and he could feel Petra give a subdued, simple nod as a quiet whimper left her throat at his gentle touch.
"Yeah. That one was a bit more tricky if you can believe it. It has notes of citrus, white jasmine, lilies, and a few other things that I can't really remember." She seemed to pause for a moment, and when she spoke again, her voice was warm, "You actually surprised me that night Levi, you know, back in the hotel? You seem to have a really prominent sense of smell, and so I kinda thought that something a bit more subtle would be better, because maybe more robust smells might be overwhelming or too aggressive for you. But, you promised me that you'd give me your honest opinion, so you better not back out now. Do you…like it? She gave me just a small bottle to try out, so if you don't like it then I'll just try again next time."
Levi took a breath, inhaling the scent on her skin and allowing the aroma to fill his airways because it was so…calming, he decided after a moment. There were a few bright notes that lifted the sweet fragrance, but all in all, the scent was gentle and subdued, like the sunrise of a spring morning, or the wafting cool breeze over a grassy plain. So very, very like Petra herself, and Levi found it almost impossible to pick out her own natural scent from the complimenting perfume that she wore, because it harmonized with the petite ginger so well.
He nodded into her skin, "I do. I like all of it, very much." He sat up slightly, allowing his eyes to trace down her body as he spoke, "This is really nice too, the fit is nice, it makes your boobs look amazing, and this-" he found his hands moving down to her hips, and he allowed himself to give a slight sigh as his fingers pressed into the skin of her hips with a greater degree of force, because he still couldn't get over how irresistible those panties were. He pulled at the ribbon, just slightly, and he bit back a growl as the pangs of arousal pulsed through his body with a thrumming, fiery surge, "This is going to fucking ruin me."
Petra gave a shy laugh and she positioned herself beneath him so she could wrap her arms around him, tracing her hand up his back and feeling his muscles flex and pulse beneath her fingertips, "Good. I know we don't have all that much time nowadays, so I wanted to…well, do something special. You mean a lot to me Levi, and even though we both have responsibilities and the military doesn't leave a lot of time for us, I've been trying really hard to make sure you're caught up enough to relax a little. I want to find little moments like this to be there for you. I mean, I am your wife after all, so it's up to me to take care of my man, don't you think?"
Levi gave a sigh, not surprised that Petra had used up her own free time to bail him out once again, but feeling guilty just the same. His words came out as a conflicted, reflective sort of whisper, "You do more than enough for me, Pet."
She blushed when he used her nickname, and Levi ran his hand over her stomach and palmed the planes of her abdomen, finally giving into the temptation and pulling at a single ribbon until the fabric opened at the sides, hardly staying up on her rounded hips now that one end had been undone.
He gave a shaky exhale as his eyes traced her silky skin, struggling to focus as he continued, "Frankly, I feel the need to do something for you in return, because this is just too much and I haven't done anything for you, other than what my job requires."
She gave him a concerned shake of her head, "Levi, it's okay. We've all been busy and-"
"And you still managed to do all of this."
"I've been on leave." She corrected gently, "I'm not an officer. You are. I know you like to be a harsh critic of yourself, but the whole reason I did this was so we could enjoy some time together – not give you another ten reasons to beat yourself up." She paused, giving him a teasing grin and trailing a single finger over his skin, "You think I look okay though, right? I mean, you like this?"
"Yes." Levi admitted easily, and Petra's smile brightened at his simple confirmation. He nodded toward her, "But it's not wrong for me to want to do something for you too, especially after something like this. How about we start here; you tell me what you want, how you want it, and I'll make it happen; whatever you say okay? And then, considering I apparently don't have any deskwork and a decently open weekend, maybe…" He paused in thought, a pensive expression coming across his face until he looked toward her directly with a nod, "Well, want me to take you out? You know, like a date, or some shit like that?"
Petra had cocked her head, a growing smile pulling at her lips and she watched him in amazement, "Wait, I thought that Captain Levi doesn't date, you remember that?"
He almost chuckled, and he pulled at the other ribbon, until with a satisfying sort of zip, the pink material somewhat fell from off around her and his grin widened all the more. He almost shook his head and he struggled to meet her gaze as his stare continuously lingered on her pale, soft and inviting skin, "Well if I recall, you said that you usually put out on the first date, right? Believe me, if you were in my position, you'd give it a shot too."
Levi pulled the loose, untied fabric from off of her, and he caressed her inner thigh gently. Petra gave a quiet gasp, and she nodded with a feverish shake of her head, "Okay, deal. What time are you thinking?"
"Well I may not have meetings per say, but with your return to active duty I need to rewrite my material for next week and that's going to take some time. I'll try to be finished before dinner though, so if you don't mind waiting for me then-"
"Of course, whatever you want, Captain."
He looked up toward her and corrected her with a quirk of his brow, "No, whatever you want, Petra. That's the point here, remember? I mean, all of this is just…wow." Levi allowed his expression to soften as he looked down at her with a heated, predatory stare, "Please, tell me Petra, what do you want?"
He carefully leaned toward her and kissed her neck, giving her time to think and sighing in contentment as she ran her fingers up the center of his back, over his neck; her nails grazing his skin and coming to run through his cropped hair in a way that made goosebumps rise over his skin.
She rubbed her body up against his, and she grinned when Levi's eyes slipped closed, a low, pleased hum leaving him as she pressed herself into him with a wind of her body. She wrapped a leg around him, pulling him lower toward her as she lightly pecked the skin of his neck, whispering into his ear as she spoke.
"You mean it, Captain? Any way I want?" she asked quietly, a sort of hesitance clearly lacing her voice as a sudden, almost forbidden thought came to her mind, and Levi smirked at the shift in her tone because her sudden reluctance was notable, and he could only imagine what this woman had in store for him.
He nodded and kissed her skin in return, grinding his hips into her and gasping at the heat from her bare skin, "Any way you want. Just say it."
There was a moment where Petra merely ran her lips against his skin, as though giving the matter deep thought and still hesitant to actually speak aloud what she wanted from him – something that intrigued him all the more because now he was extremely curious as to what naughty thing she was thinking of, and he chuckled as the silence extended all the more because it seemed clear that perhaps she wouldn't be finding the nerve after all. He supposed he shouldn't be all that surprised, because Petra was so modest and gentle in nature.
To ask for something risqué or something that fell to the side of fetishism – he imagined that would take time.
"Very well then, Pet." He sat up slightly, allowing his hands to trace her bare sides as he stole a long glance at her chest, "If you're too shy, then I suppose that I'll just have to-" He had moved a hand underneath her back, searching for perhaps a zipper, maybe a sash or ribbon that held the ensemble together, but at once Petra's eyes widened in concern, and she shook her head outright, "No, no Levi, I - what I…"
At her sudden correction, Levi paused for a moment, his smirk growing all the more as a blush came to her face because her sudden outburst had apparently surprised them both, and Petra took a stabilizing breath. She just needed to say it, and the longer she waited the more difficult it would become. She knew that, but even still…
At the request she was considering perhaps voicing, her heart was pounding in her chest because it seemed almost selfish. She was blushing, she knew she was blushing, and as Levi looked at her, his blue eyes swirling with desire, a certain lean to his posture as though he really were hanging on her every word, Petra gave a sigh.
She looked toward her Captain directly, her voice soft but laced with resolve, "Levi I want, I mean what I really want…" She paused as she seemed to lose her nerve once more, and Levi leaned toward her, pressing his lips against hers to encourage her and bolster her wavering resolve because gods, she just had to tell him.
"Woman, it's okay. What do you want? You want me to take you? To fuck you? Something dirty? Did you maybe want to ride me this time? I sure as hell wouldn't mind that, especially if I got to watch you while you're wearing something like this. Or not wearing something like this – I'd like that just as much. Gods woman, talk to me already."
He was so close that she could feel his heart beating in his chest, feel the warmth of his skin as his fingers traced up her body, his lips still brushing hers as he spoke, and Petra couldn't help but wind her body against his, desire fueling her because she knew exactly what she wanted, and she had for some time.
"Levi." She said his name and found herself kissing him, slowly at first, but with a building and desperate intensity as she forced herself to admit the truth, "I want you to make love to me."
She kissed him again, giving a moan into his mouth at the truth behind her words, her hands palming down his back, over his sides and she allowed her hands to crest over his rear as she rolled her hips into his with a whimper, "Please, Captain. Just that. That's what I want. Please."
At her words, Levi couldn't help the surprise that came over him, and the once smug grin left his face instantly because of all the things he had been expecting her to say…that had not even been close to what he had been prepared for, no, not even in the same realm of possibilities. Seeing his agape response, as though he didn't even know how to respond to her, any resolve Petra had managed to find within herself had instantly vanished, and she was already back pedaling, "I mean, if you can or…I mean…maybe something else is fine too. It was just, an idea I had on the fly."
Levi couldn't help but stare at her in wonder, because more than her attempts to coverup her previous request, it seemed she hadn't forgotten. He had told her once that it took actual love, that being in love with someone was a requirement in order to truly make love to them, and he was no fool that her request stood more as a question, a confirmation of his feelings for her, more than a simple matter as to how she wanted to be touched by him.
He marveled at the blushing woman beneath him, because in her own unique way, Petra had found a way to ask him if he was actually in love with her.
At the conflicted expression across his face, knowing that her question had put a sudden halt to their intimacy when it should have been heated; heavy breaths and shaking hands, sloppy kisses and loud moans – Petra felt a sudden flash of embarrassment, and she gave an empty laugh as she wound a hand around the back of his neck to pull him in toward her, her tone light and understanding, "Sorry. That really wasn't fair of me Levi; forget about it. Whatever you want, okay? I mean, this was for you after all, so how about you tell me what you're wanting – it sounds like you've got some ideas, after all."
As she tried to force them to move on and not linger on the subject in fear she had done damage by even asking him in the first place, Levi pulled his neck back at her easy dismissal, knowing that she was just saying that to make him happy. She was sacrificing herself and her feelings for him, like she always did, and he tried not to sigh because as much as he teased her about it, this girl just didn't have a selfish bone in her body. Regardless her dismissal, even still he found himself giving the matter some pause.
He remembered asking himself once, some number of months ago now, what it would look like, to love her – to be in love with her, and accept her love in return. Back then, he had almost mentally pictured it as some sort of secret…twelve step process or something, where they would suddenly behave in some mysterious way that he had seen other couples do in the past.
The notion in and of itself that, maybe Petra could love him, and wanted his love in return - had once caught him off guard, frustrated him even, because while he could sense for so long that's where things had been going whether either of them liked it or not, he had been fearful that in the end, he simply wouldn't be what Petra truly needed out of a husband. He was too cold, scarred and hesitant, and Petra was still so young, full of life and ambition and he had been so sure that he would break her because as much as she would try to deny it, his inability to return her feelings would devastate her.
He had wondered how he would ever express such a thing, or if his 'love' – assuming he could ever learn to feel such a thing in the first place - could actually make her happy or not, because he had no experience on the matter, and as a result he was purely selfish in nature, even now.
Now though, thinking of the fire in her eyes, the way she cautiously yet intentionally brought out a sort of bravery within himself to dare to grow his relationship with her, the times they shared, and the knowledge that no other woman could ever pursue after him, nor care for him in the same way that Petra had, knowing that just as certain as he was that he would fail her completely, Petra was equally as certain that he wouldn't…
Petra took a deep breath then, the sound pulling him out of his thoughts, and she ran her fingers down the sides of his face to grab his attention completely because he was clearly lost in thought, and she nodded at him seriously, "Really, Levi. It's okay if you're not-"
"Only to you." He whispered as he stared at her purposefully, and the words Petra had previously spoken died on her tongue as a new silence fell between the pair.
Her green eyes widened, and she blinked, "…What?"
"Only to you, Petra. If-" he swallowed as he tried to pick his words, "If that's what you truly want from me. I'll…try."
"You will? I mean…you can?" her question was quiet, a mere whisper, and he didn't miss when tears began to form in her eyes as she looked across the room in attempts to avoid his gaze, "Listen Levi, if you say things like that, it just…well, it really gets a girl's hopes up, you know? She might just think-"
"Good."
He pulled her against him without another word, and he pressed his lips against hers, hungry and searching, and he couldn't help but sigh when Petra eagerly wrapped her arms around his back and returned his kiss with a sort of sniffle; her face already wet with tears.
Did he love her?
Fuck…of course he did.
What he had once feared would be impossible, feared would be the outright end of them because he just didn't know what such a thing would look like, gods, he had been afraid for nothing. In the end, it really was as easy as breathing. He didn't have to try to love her, he simply did, without question. He could feel it in his thoughts, in his desire, in his fear of hurting her or losing her…
It was love, he realized now with overwhelming clarity.
Those actions, his overwhelming desire to be near her and learn her, protect her and support her - that was simply how his deep affection for her had manifested itself in his daily life and behavior; in ways he would have never expected.
Perhaps the only thing that astounded him, more than the fact that he did love her, truly, was the fact that it had happened so easily. Even now, he couldn't point to when the change had occurred, to a time or moment where it all just 'clicked into place' – no, he just knew by sheer instinct that he did, through and through.
With the way Petra's lips were pressing against his, in a slow and sensual manner, he gave a quiet exhale when her hands moved around his waist and she unbuttoned his pants, pulling the fabric downward, and Levi shifted onto his side so he could assist in the task.
Petra had shifted as well, following his movement as she sat up from the bed, and as he pulled the material off his legs, setting his discarded pants aside, Petra had crawled toward him, moving her legs around him until she was straddling his hips and she pushed him back into the bed as she leaned over him. Levi exhaled as she palmed his chest, leaning into his touch as his fingers curled around one of her laced, yet still immaculately presented breasts. Her voice was soft as she spoke, "Gods Levi, I just love you so damn much."
"Yeah." He merely whispered with an affirming nod, pleased by her words because some part of him would never quite get used to hearing her say such things to him, and he sighed when her lips met his skin, her hot breath sending tingles across his body as she nipped and sucked at him with a flurry of kisses and love bites.
"And I love it when we get to be together like this too. Gods, I think Monday marks a full three weeks or something like that."
"Nineteen days." He rasped out in a low hiss, because Petra was winding her hips against him in unhurried, pleasurable circles, rubbing up and down his groin, and Levi couldn't help the moan that left his lips as the heat of her body surged through the thin fabric of his underwear. His muscles felt so tight with desire as he watched her tender, desperate expression and the soft smile that pulled at her lips as she watched him with a warm expression. Amidst his desire, a sort of wildfire surging through his veins, some alternative part of him felt so very, very exposed to the beautiful woman above him, in ways he had never felt before, because now…she knew.
She knew his heart, perhaps at this point more than any other woman had before. She knew he struggled with people, struggled with intimacy, she knew that he was hesitant; afraid of allowing her to be his weakness, intentionally, and yet there was nothing he could do because he was simply too far gone to back out now. She knew that he wanted this, so fucking bad. Regardless his weaknesses and his mannerisms and everything about him that pushed others away, she knew he wanted her in ways he couldn't even express, simply because he was human and he longed for that connection – to be special to someone and to be wanted and needed and cared for.
He was…in love with her, and even if she broke him, even if she hurt him or betrayed his trust, he supposed the tradeoff was more than fair. He'd gladly take the heart break if it meant he got to have her like this – experience her love and see her flourish as he loved her in return. And so now…he found that above all, he wanted to try.
For Petra of course, but perhaps for himself as well.
If there was any woman worth fighting for, any woman worth pursuing – even if he'd only end up playing the fool, he supposed there were much worse things that he could be called foolish for. Even if she'd only ruin him in the end, he was more than happy to sit back and watch her do it, because of course…she never would.
She had his heart, and while it completely scared the hell out of him…hell, she could keep it for as long as she wanted.
…
...
Their time together had been sweet, passionate, and long overdue – both of them staying up late into the night in attempts to make up for lost time, now that the moment had finally presented itself for the first time since their return to headquarters.
Levi had spent hours, telling her all that she meant to him, touching her in the ways that she liked to be touched; holding her and focusing on everything that was so uniquely Petra, until there was nothing else on his mind except her. Of course he had fucked her in the past – other times he had been gentle, doting or possessive, in some cases a purposeful tease as he tormented her and refused to give her what she wanted until she begged him for it – but this…he had never made a point of loving her, intentionally using such a time to focus on the bond that ran between them. Slowing down, focusing on their desire to simply be with each other – it had been uniquely thrilling because he knew how much it meant to Petra – and there was no denying how special the time had been for him as well.
As they were now, Petra was nestled against his side, her hair still wet from their recent shower and the smell of soap still strong on her skin, and he traced a hand down the side of her body, feeling her shiver at the gentle caress.
"Pet, you…awake?"
"Mmhmm. Somewhat, I think."
"I was thinking, about earlier and I guess…I'm sorry you had to ask at all - how I felt about you, that is. You keep having to do that. I'm sorry."
His words had come as a bit of a surprise, and the petite woman fell perfectly still as Levi gave a shake of his head and whispered further, "There are times that I myself don't even know what I'm feeling and it's just…this sort of thing is difficult for me, even after all this time and everything you've done. Some days are fine, but other days I just can't even believe that this is actually my life. It's like a part of me expects to eventually wake up and find that it was all this cosmic, amazing dream. I have a complicated past, and one day I'll tell you about it – how I grew up and why you're so fucking amazing for someone like me but for now…"
Petra rolled onto her side, her green eyes shining in the light with a mix of concern and awe, and Levi gave a long exhale as he continued softly, "Just be patient because I'm not ready to tell you everything, not yet at least. But still, I want you to know that I do, uh, love you, Petra. Really. And I don't ever want you to have to doubt that. I mean, I'm not complaining about your approach because this was great, but if you ever need to know or to be reminded that I want this with you, and that I'm satisfied with you because I've built this sort of bond with you alone – next time, just ask. And when you do, I'll tell you again, as many times as it takes for you to believe it."
The Captain fell silent then, and Petra eventually gave a soft nod, a shy smile pulling at her lips as she nuzzled her cheek against his chest and whispered softly in return, "Thank you, Levi. For the record, you're pretty amazing too, for someone like me. And I know you don't believe that I'm the lucky one, but one day, I'll make you see it for yourself."
She gave a light press of her lips to his skin and hummed, "Goodnight, Captain."
…
End of Chapter
...
Meanwhile: Eld was standing far down the corridor, stationed purposefully where the hall split, where one side led to their shared dorm room, and the other end was where a certain Ackerman was undoubtedly enjoying some much-needed alone time with his wife.
From the main hall Oluo approached, waving toward Eld with a single raised hand, "Hey Eld – you seen the Captain anywhere?"
Eld furrowed his eyebrows in obvious frustration and nodded with gusto, "Damn, you're looking for him too, eh? I swear he does this on purpose. Man's impossible to find when you need him – I was hoping to review some material for next week but the man's a no show. What do you need him for?"
Oluo looked surprised at Eld's clearly angered response, and he groaned, "Great. It's nothing major, but I'm trying to schedule some time off and he's been impossible to track down lately. Have you checked his office, maybe his bedroom or whatever?"
Eld rolled his eyes scathingly and crossed his arms in indignance, "Right - like that's not the first place I looked? Checked his office, checked his room, checked with Erwin, and finally figured that I'd stop running around the whole campus and just stand watch here. He can't get to his office or bedroom without passing me first, so he's bound to show up sooner or later. After I'm done chewing him out, I'll be sure to let him know that you're looking for him as well. No reason for both us of to waste our time standing guard like this."
Oluo nodded, giving a pat on his shoulder as he walked by, "Thanks man – try not to piss him off too much. I'll be in our room until then, just let me know."
"Will do!" Eld called out after him, allowing himself a pleased smirk at Oluo's simple and uneventful retreat.
This was now the fifth person he had successfully redirected away from trying to seek out Levi, and Eld allowed himself a small chuckle as he leaned back against the wall in satisfaction.
The Captain owed him big, and Eld was undoubtedly looking forward to eventually cashing in the favor.
…
End END of Chapter
...
Alright yall, I don't normally do 'epilogues' shall be say, but this was a special occasion!
Of course, this is a special chapter that has been coming for a long time. True little author's note on this end, but originally this story was never going to have the 'I love yous' from either person because I could see Levi and Petra being the type to not obsess about feelings and needing to say the three magic words but yeah, this story was set up in such a way where that wasn't really plausible so it took the battle of, okay, I'm going to introduce Levi to love – have him experience it, and recognize it, and eventually verbalize it and-
Honestly, I'm not mad at it :)
I think I will take next week off as well, and with any luck, that should have to be my last break until this story is officially over. The holes are getting filled in bit by, and like I said before, there's just not a lot of material left to write out – even though it seems daunting. Like was stated by one of yall (you are a saint for reviewing each week by the way, there are a few of yall who do and if it means anything at all, I notice and am SO grateful!) but with there being so much time where Levi and Petra are away from each other…filling this arc where it's not bare bones but not lingering on details that don't matter, it's tricky.
This puts the next update right after Christmas, on the 27th. Merry Christmas yall – see yall soon!